Peaceweaver (previously entitled Dragons in the Sky)

The pitch for Peaceweaver intrigued me, not least because I run a local history website for an area of the Welsh Borders, so Gruffydd, Harold et al. feel like old friends. The pitch sets the scene well as Harold plots to become King of Wales by marriage as well as of England. I enjoyed the story told from Eadgyth's point of view, and the prologue set in the aftermath of the conquest makes a gripping opening, followed by a smooth transition into a ten year flashback. This structure often leaves the narrative feeling fragmentary, but here you pull it off with barely a ripple - well done. Your style, idiom and dialogue all fit well with the period and your genre, and though I have not been able to read beyond the first few chapters your research seems thorough to give a historically convincing account of the period. I'll back this with pleasure, and come back to read more when I can.

Hi Judith!

This is a wonderfully written piece of literary fiction, very highly polished! I'm feeling a bit out of my realm here in offering any constructive nits, this is really so well done... Your descriptive prose is probably the best I've seen on the site and the dialogue you weave is rich and has an authentic historical feel to it.

I'm always interested to see what people think of prologues... I know there are a number of people that don't like them. Yours I liked - in my opinion it was well done and set up the story nicely. (I'm mostly interested now because I'm tempted to use one in my next project.) Your storyline, while has the romantic angle and will obviously have great appeal to the female audience, I think you'll attract all sorts with the action, murder and intrigue you've included as well. I really liked this! Great job - backed with pleasure!

Kim
Invisible Justice

WOW.
My mouth hangs open in awe.
Your narrative is beautiful. Simply stunning. Really.
I cannot write anything else. You have a talent that is amazing. I adored this. And it isn't even something I would standardly read!
If I call this gorgeous will it be going overboard?
Right from the get-go it was imagery that was so vivid and rich that I could see eveything. The line about the fires being newly quenched by sheeting rain, seriously gave me goose bumps on my arms.
You are a very very talented writer.
Backed-without a doubt!
T.L Tyson-Seeking Eleanor

Hi Judith, your writing is brilliant I was transported back in time through your descriptions. I like that you gave us a feel for Eadgyth's life in England so we can feel for her when she is shipped off to Ireland. I like how the screaming 13 year old described our beautiful land, she was right though endless rain and an ungodly race! You have given a good background to the story without feeling to overwhelming, her father out of favour is now plotting against the King with the Danish. Its really well written, the dialogue is strong and so is the story. It's on my shelf.
Helena (A Load of Rubbish)

Peaceweaver has all the makings of absorbing historical fiction. The prologue immediately hooks the reader both with the atmospere of growing danger and the desperate situation of the characters. Very well done!

Iva P.
Fame and Infamy

A very professionally written historical fiction. The characters are well presented and your research has been incorporated without the dreaded Information dumps.

Well done.

Wendy Bertsch
(Once More...From the Beginning)

Peaceweaver speaks to the historically intrigued facet of my nature, and although I'm no expert, I thought this was a well-research and dazzling piece of work. You do not let your knowledge of the facts interfere with the reader's enjoyment of the fiction, instead, it enhances the pleasurable read.

Great work.
Abi xxx

This is an interesting story. I had a little trouble with the names at first (I appreciate you can't do anything about that; historical names are names). Once I got past those, I really enjoyed this. It's the type of book you can really sink into and lose yourself in the story. I'm adding this to my shelf. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

Peaceweaver

It takes a very special skill to congruently create character and dialogue that is believable for such historical time and place. You have that skill in abundance.
I sense depth and style that is intelligent and well thought out. A fantastic piece of writing.

Isn't this site wonderful, how the dickens has this wonderful book been forgotten about, languishing in the lower ranks when it should be so much higher.

I love the writing, very fluid and a joy to read. Your narrative voice is almost hypnotic it grabbed me and dragged me along, weaving my way through history and your wonderful prose.

A stunning addition to the genre, a shame more people aren't enjoying it.

Happily shelved without a second thought.

Melxx

The pitch for Peaceweaver intrigued me, not least because I run a local history website for an area of the Welsh Borders, so Gruffydd, Harold et al. feel like old friends. The pitch sets the scene well as Harold plots to become King of Wales by marriage as well as of England. I enjoyed the story told from Eadgyth's point of view, and the prologue set in the aftermath of the conquest makes a gripping opening, followed by a smooth transition into a ten year flashback. This structure often leaves the narrative feeling fragmentary, but here you pull it off with barely a ripple - well done. Your style, idiom and dialogue all fit well with the period and your genre, and though I have not been able to read beyond the first few chapters your research seems thorough to give a historically convincing account of the period. I'll back this with pleasure, and come back to read more when I can.

This is wonderful. Very well imagined and executed.

(As for ways to clean up, place names are never in italics, and non-English words are only in italics the first time they are given and defined. )

Hi Judith,
I have read the first two chs and dipped into the rest (just so that you know what my comments are based on. )
First of all, lots of positives - the atmosphere and tone is quickly established and i get a real sense of the period. You have a real talent for description - lots of phrases I could piuck out, but just a few examples that particularly struck me - 'Where the world has no edge' / 'I had learned early that boys often lied.' /'ice-locked' / ' You are beautiful.... proud.' There are however (in my opinion) a few areas that could be improved - some general pruning would help to tighten the narrative - eg - 'I dipped my face into my cup..' - you don't need 'to hide my blushes' (better to let the reader think through for themselves what the action shows. As it stands it is telling us. A couple of problems with back-story - eg when she discovers that Rhodri is her husband's son - the servant mentions 'young princes' running around, then we get the 'are they still in service' query - illogical question after ref to princes. Also why would the servant say he believed Rhodri was the last - he'd KNOW. If the query was Rhodri's status it would seem both more believable and better paced (imo).
My biggest problem though was with the dialogue, which I found generally unconvincing and lacking in 'punch'. Partly it is the use of 'tis' which doesn't sit comfortably with the more formal tone- which is appropriate. But (imo) most of the dialogue jarrs, some bits more than others - eg - 'Aw dear lil' one' gushed Anwen. -I'm afraid I cringed here.
I hope you don't feel I've been too negative, but I learnt most on here from those who weren't afraid to give constructive criticism and your descriptive ability is so good that its a shame to spoil its effect by dialogue that doesn't match it.
Good luck with this, well-worth re-working,
Margaret

What a FANTASTIC read! I loved this...well, it is one of my favourite periods in history, but you have recreated it sooooo well.
Backed.

Read the first chapter here, Judith. This is a very approachable piece. Great description of the times, as well as the surroundings. Loved the narrative voice--especially aboard the ship. I've put off bed for too long as it is, but I will definitely be back to continue on with chapter 2.
Gerry
(Shakespeare's Talking Head)
Dropcloth Angels

I get rather lost beyond the eighteenth century, find it all too distant to excite empathy, but you conjure something convincing here. Your characters have a pulse and your vocabulary a vibrancy. The hook at the end of your prologue is delivered with a pleasing quiet flourish. I think that you hit a well-measured level of ye-olde with your language; it has an accent that is persuasively antiquated, but not so mannered as to distract. This is richly coloured and engaging.

Wonderful. Really good historic novel writers don't need to constantly remind the reader where they are, they know their period so well they live it and because of that, the reader lives there as well.
You know your period and I was there.

This promises to be an absorbing and well written tale by someone who knows and loves the history so well the details of time, place and context flow naturally (us less learned folk know how hard this is to achieve!). I immediately believe I am hearing Eadgyth's voice describing what has happened to her - rather than an author regurgitating researched facts.

Rich, brooding, atmospheric, this well-written tale of medieval plotting and politicking feels entirely authentic. The landscape is alive in an animistic way, powerful, cruel, and beautiful. Eadgyth is chattel, a political pawn, as were all women of the period. A beautifully painted historical novel.
Ruth
Amsterdam 2012

What a grim and stark period of history this tells of, and does so in terms suited to those times rather than dressed up in fancy language. Ireland turns out more miserable than England for young Eadyth as her father plays the dangerous game of politics in which she is coinage. Then to Wales, and a bit of a shock about Rhodri. An extremely authentic-sounding account of the birthing chamber, followed by a time of relative happiness. But how could you leave the extract there, Judith!!?

The writing is crisp and eloquent: 'my cheeks began to sting as warmer air licked my frozen skin'; 'a consequence that made me regret not telling him sooner'. And Eadyth is a character buffeted by fate but who grows in strength of mind and emotion. Apt for Christmas Eve too ... backed.

One of the greatest thing about authonomy is how it encourages us to go outside our area of interest and read thing we would never consider on a normal basis. This is one of those situations for me. The first word that comes to my mind when considering your prose is 'elegant'. Your structure and phrasing seem to glide effortlesly from scene to scene.
Well done,
MickR - The Nightcrawler

It would be to state the obvious that this is very well researched.
I've read the first three chapters and I can say that the research never became an information dump or a lecture but was interwoven with a good balance of narrative and dialogue.
For me, perhaps the most engaging thing about Peaceweaver is the sense of involvement that you bring through your very careful selection of period detail; so creating a very real sense of place and immediacy.
As Eadgyth shields her son, Harold Haroldsson, from 'The Conquerer' we feel there, with Eadgyth, sharing her concern for the safety of her son and, indeed, of herself.
The ongoing scene is very well described 'we climbed the steep castle hill, inhaling the acrid stench of smouldering fires, nearly quenched by sheeting rain.' You're clearly seeing what you are describing and doing so through an exquisite period filter.
The scene of family around the fire, the kind or food they would eat and its preparation are meticulously detailed, again without lecturing, while the narrative build makes us aware of two women, fugitive to a man who would have no hesitation to 'put out our eyes and cut off our noses.'
The flashback to 1056 momentarily changes the mood while concisely bringing in only the most necessary backstory and giving a fascinating insight into the privileges of lifestyle of an aristocrat of the time.
The interweaving of dialogue with narrative is effectively balanced as you unfold the circumstances of Edward's exile and the threats to regency.
I could read this for the very engaging way in which, applying all your senses, you involve me in a very tangible but intimate way with your characters and the growing sense of jeopardy.
Shelved for hard work, craftsmanship and and an affinity to period which the author makes entirely infectious.
Ray
(A Child from the Wishing Well)

Beautiful writing which suits the time, place and characters of the story very well. The dialogue feels appropriate and the pictures painted of the environments encountered by the women are clear and strong. My knowledge of this period in history is not great but I learnt much from your descriptive writing. I know sometimes historical fiction includes a potted history and, although I read and enjoyed it without such, I think my understanding of the context of the story would have increased by knowing just a little more of the political context: having said that, I wouldn't want it to turn into a history lesson! Happy to shelve, both for the quality of the writing and the story, Carolyn.

Judith,
(Peaceweaver)

This is an extraordinarily well thought-out tale that offers evidence of profound knowledge in history and painstaking research into the medieval era in which it takes place. The accuracy of the period seems near-flawless if not completely without error, and it is clear you have done your homework. Your charachers are real and the surroundings so lifelike as to transport the reader back in time. If there are hiccups in the story, or in the accuracy of the portrayal of the time period, this is written in a vein which is beyond my own realm of expertise. I would not know the mistakes to see them. In truth I cannot offer any real meaningful critisism, without being unsure I am the one in the wrong. I must say that you have shown yourself to be a masterful writer. This will do well, I think.

Just a sidenote. I read some of your feedbacks. I am surprised so many women are shocked at what was done to females in that period. Yes, they did indeed poke the eyes of females out. That, and much, much worse. I falter when it comes to certain aspects of this point in history, and there are gaps in my knowledge when it comes to medieval time. However, I have studied extensively the treatment of women. Aside from the frighteing lack of knowldge as far as medics, or good eating and hygeine practices, the medieval era would have been a wonderous time to live in. It was a simpler time, when things were much more clear-cut. For women, it would have had its beauty and romance, and if she was lucky, it would be wonderful. It was a place a lady would love to visit for a time, and perhaps desire to live there. Until she put a foot wrong. If she did, she better hope her time-machine survived the journey, because it would be the last place she wanted to be. Any one who doubts my words should research a medieval weapon known as the Dunking Stool.Reading up on it, I can hear the questions now. Did they really use such an aweful thing? Surely not.

Yes. They did.

This was a delight to read, an eye-opener for anyone who takes the the modern world and the laws that govern it for granted. Impressive. Shelved.

-Raven
The shadowsword Saga

I am backing this because I believe it is genuine quality writing, and I'm impressed. Will comment a bit more fully soon.

Bill (Faust's Butterfly)

A convincing window into a fascinating period of history - did they really put the eyes of women out? I only have one tiny nark - sometimes there are misplaced commas or places crying out for commas (e.g. the sentence 'Too close to the stronghold for comfort now...')

Very well done,
Annabelle

A vivid tapestry of fantasy delight.
V
Hawaiian Orchid/Ginger

Judith

I loved this, move over Antonia Fraser......

The language is consistent, sometimes in period novels this isn't always the case.....You obviously morphed yourself into character as you wrote.....

There is a book on this site,,, Munro's Choice by Margaret Skea.....She made her Harper Collins review public. It gives a detailed overview of what publishers are looking for in the Literary Historical Fiction genre........You should stop by if you havenn't already.....

Finely shaped narrative and digestible dialogue....It was a pleasure to read.

Shelved with enthusiasm and good wishes.

Peaceweaver:

Judith, what a great story, and your excellent writing brings the reader right into the past alongside Eadgytha (Is this a form of Agatha?) making the characters and setting very real. But oh, how dreadful if cutting off noses and prying womens' eyes out was routine torture in those days? What a lot of research you must have done, but the result being this book, is something to be right proud of. :)

Will give this a spin on my shelf.

Cáit ~ Muckers ~

Good storytelling, you have a vivid imagination.

The tone seems to match the period and the descriptive writing is on point.

It is obvious that it required a lot of research and you have put it all together masterfully.

Best wishes

Scott
The Esrevinu Chronicles/Secrets of the Elephant Rocks

Hi Judith, your writing is brilliant I was transported back in time through your descriptions. I like that you gave us a feel for Eadgyth's life in England so we can feel for her when she is shipped off to Ireland. I like how the screaming 13 year old described our beautiful land, she was right though endless rain and an ungodly race! You have given a good background to the story without feeling to overwhelming, her father out of favour is now plotting against the King with the Danish. Its really well written, the dialogue is strong and so is the story. It's on my shelf.
Helena (A Load of Rubbish)

Judith, what an imagination you have to be able to bring these scenes to life. It's wonderfully evocative and absorbing. Backed. Tania, This Last Summer

Cinematic. Your flowing prose and description therefore work very well together to create images that entice one to read on. Authentic dialogue adds to the pleasure of the read.

BACKED

Thank you for your comments and your backing for The Ironing Board. I appreciate it greatly. I've put your book on my watchlist and even though it's not my usual genre I promise to give it a read. Thanks again.
Karen

Judith
I'm not normally a reader of historical fiction, but your pitch got me reading. Your sentences are beautifully cadenced, and you paint colourful realistic scenes. This is like watching a movie from the past. I am impressed!
Backed
Frank

Your settings are beautifully brought to life. The description of Eadgyth's grandfather's home, 'where rolling hills cupped us gently,' is typical of the skill you display in this area. Your characters, also, are well drawn, natural and unstilted. Eadgyth is a spirited heroine, full of life and determination. The plot, dealing as it does with a period when so much was happening, and with its central character a girl / woman living in the very heart of things, is exciting, gripping, and well developed. Backed.
Gerry McCullough,
Belfast Girls.

Dear Judith,

You bring the eleventh century alive from a woman's perspective, like an afterthought, since at this time it would have been unimaginable for women to express the experiences of their roles, in monastries, maybe (Hildegard von Bingen), but not in politics. This is beautifully absorbing thanks to your equisite prose. Backed with pleasure.

Pia (Course of Mirrors)

Hello Judith, As promised, here goes. What can I say. This is a beautifully told tale of the time of William The Conqueror's defeat of Saxon Britain. Your narrative prose is truly excellent and your characters just leap off the page.
I love the line '...rolling hills cupping us gently... especially, but there are many other such lines. The reader is taken back in time and experiences all the heart-ache of a people in fear of their lives. And is their hope on the horizon? I have nothing whatsoever to criticise in this story. Well done and I have no hesitation in SHELVING this wonderful writing. Would love to read more.

Phyllis Burton
A Passing Storm

WOW.
My mouth hangs open in awe.
Your narrative is beautiful. Simply stunning. Really.
I cannot write anything else. You have a talent that is amazing. I adored this. And it isn't even something I would standardly read!
If I call this gorgeous will it be going overboard?
Right from the get-go it was imagery that was so vivid and rich that I could see eveything. The line about the fires being newly quenched by sheeting rain, seriously gave me goose bumps on my arms.
You are a very very talented writer.
Backed-without a doubt!
T.L Tyson-Seeking Eleanor

Very good story. I find that sometimes this kind of history can be confusing to me, but you've written it in a way that has made it an enjoyable read. I understood what I read, connected to the characters and felt the emotions emanate from your story.
Nice work and good luck!

SD Gillen

Being Welsh and a history teacher i found this book difficult to pass up when i came across it. i think it is beautifully written, the characterisation is excellent and the plot is well developed. it is not the read for an airport but one that requires a cup of cocoa and a warm fire and an evening of bliss with a wonderful strong story.
Best wishes with your book, really happy to back it
Chris (inside out)

You took me right back into time and helped me to see in the past. Great storytelling! Keep it up.

Kristin
Demon in the Knight

historical fiction is not usually my taste, but you certainly demonstrate your knowledge of that era. i thought the wriitng was great and you did a good job keeping the reader interested. the only thing i felt was a little heavy was the shift in time/locations throughout chapter one. but, then again this is the first historical fiction novel i have read. still, its a matter of my taste and nothing against your pacing or chapter structure. i know plenty of friends of mine who would love to read this. overall, great work!

This is a rich story, one to settle down with on a grey November day.
You clearly know your stuff, the detail is very impressive. I have been fully transported into this world.

Excellent! Polished, well written and an intriguing story line. Rich detail takes us right to that time and place. Well done! Backing.

Camille
Curse of the Golden Fly

A fine piece of work about an era of great interest to language scholars like myself. The names might throw some American and non-native speakers for a loop, but otherwise, an excellent read.
Backed
Bonalibro
Moonbeam Highway.

Dear Judith Arnopp,

Thank you for sharing your story with us. Your greatest strength lies in transporting us back in time using visuals and dialect out of history. I too love Bernard Cornwell’s Saxon Chronicles and was delighted by your premise. The woman’s perspective is a great change, and I particularly enjoyed the tension of this sentence, “We cower in this dark place, two women alone.”

In my fallible opinion, a comma would serve better than a semicolon in the first sentence of your long pitch. You have a smart and tension-riveted pitch. I appreciate your desire to bring it all together in the final sentence, but I’m afraid readers may not have an appreciation for the date. I assume that it was the date of an iconic and epic battle, and I think your pitch would become even more exciting if you said that directly.

Small matters of pitch aside, you have an amazing story of a queen on the run with her two royal children. She has both motherly concerns, and concerns of royalty and succession. You don’t pull punches describing the horrors she faces, and the tension will bolt your readers to their seats. Bravo! Shelved.

Best wishes,
Alan Marling
Ghost Warrior, the Stealing

Hi Judith. Well, you certainly know your subject. By the end of chapter three we've learned a great deal about what's going on and have a deep sense of apprehension about what's coming. We've also met quite a few characters and shared their feelings and what's happening to them. Really fine job on portrayals.
You're writing is superb, very easy to follow, a comfortable flow. I only read the three chapters but I see your writing will carry off what the pitch promises very well. An interesting book well done. Certainly deserves to be backed. On my shelf. Best of luck with it, Judith.

John Harold McCoy - Bramwell Valle

Hi Judith, I do love historical fiction, it is pure escapism. You, though, have brought so much more to the genre
than a good story set in a historical background, your writing is genuinely beautiful, poetic and lush. That's all I have to say.
Paul

I found your book as an interesting treasure. I grew up in the New Forest 50-60 years ago and knew the stories. We live with the history of this time on the path to Winchester. I, and my family loook forward to reading more. I have backed your book.

I do not usually have too much sympathy with a whingeing Saxon. They fought. They came second. They rebelled in the north. They came second again. And it was not so much earlier that they were the aggressors.
And it all settled down not too much later.
But I found myself being hooked by the first part of this book. I am not too far into it yet - but I does lure one in - even me.

You bring the past alive. Your writing flows and this is a beautiful story.
This is the genre I love the most and I can imagine this book in print. I wouldn't hesitate to buy it.
Shelved,
Carole

You have a beautiful writing style, and though I might not normally pick up a book in this genre, I would buy yours! Excellent work.

The joy of literary fiction is reading it more than once so as to savour the words. And these are words you really know how to handle. The combination of an interesting story and powerful yet delicate writing makes this memorable work. I am a fan of prologues and this doesn't disappoint. The remainder is equally as impressive. Beautifully writen and a pleasure to read. Backed. Margaret.