Book Jacket

 

rank 5885
word count 12162
date submitted 03.09.2008
date updated 10.02.2009
genres: Fiction, Thriller, Romance
classification: universal
incomplete

The Millionaire Maverick

Susan James

What if one man could make everybody millionaires? What if the powerful individuals who control the world’s money supply will do anything to stop him?

 

What would happen if the entire world used a Magic Wall to create their wealth? What would then happen to the banking systems that seemed to be in control of the world and its resources? What would happen to the men and the institutions that seemed to hold the world's purse strings? And what then would happen to anyone messing with those hands that held those same purse strings? Hank Ramsan, The Millionaire Maverick was about to find out. Hank Ramsan made everyone Millionaires who learned to use his Magic Wall. This enraged the powers that controlled the world's banks because hidden secrets were revealed and lifestyles threatened, as the world's money systems crumbled. Only one person could save Hank from the peril he had created; only she didn't love him anymore. (sj)

 
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charlottesville va, cia, coffee lover, danger in knowing too much, easy wealth, fiction-romance, friesan horses, hank loves josey, hank ramsan, horses...

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Hank and Alex shook hands and went their separate ways. Alex walked towards the back of the gas station and disappeared as Hank went towards his jeep. He wasn’t sure where to go or what to do, but decided since it was early evening to go back to his hotel. Staying in for the evening and ordering room service sounded good.

The Lanto Houston was always Hank’s preference for home away from home accommodations. He felt comfortable and relaxed there and at that moment he needed to feel as comfortable as possible.

Time passed swiftly on his ride back into the city. His mind repeatedly replayed the events of the past hours. Soon he found himself in the underground parking garage of the hotel.

After making his way up the elevator to his floor, Hank reached for his hotel room door. It was unlocked. This did not feel at all comfortable. Slowly pushing the door open, assuming that whomever had been there was now gone, Hank discovered the contents of his duffel bag strewn all over the room. The closet and drawers hung open. Fortunately, he had taken the only thing of real value with him as he traveled around Houston that morning; his laptop computer and its leather case.

He considered changing rooms or hotels, but assumed that whoever was looking for him would find him elsewhere. He chose to stay where he was for the night, but was becoming more aware that he must be cautious of his surroundings and who and what to trust. For a brief moment he even questioned whether he could really trust Alex Saber. He decided not to begin second guessing things.

Hank once had an assignment with a tribe from the outback, and learned some tricks for setting traps around camps to keep unwanted humans and animals out. Now he set up such a trap around his hotel room door to ease his mind while showering. He created the trap using dental floss, needle, and thread kit, which were provided compliments of the hotel’s bathroom basket.

 

Chapters

12

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Dean Lombardo wrote 410 days ago

Hi Susan,
I read the first two chapters, and you write very well and your story is bursting with promise and even some supernatural potential. I think you are going to do well with this. Highly starred.
A few suggestions:
"memories of the girl, his love," sounds a bit melodramatic. Why not just "memories of the girl he'd loved" or "memories of the girl he loved" ?
Last two paragraphs, Chapter 1: It is my personal view that such omniscience take us out of the third person you've already established and inserts you as author too much into the story. Unless Hank is telling this whole story as a flashback and I don't think you should go that route, I think you should cut these fortune-telling last two paragraphs from Chapter 1.
Chapter 2: Consider adding first two paragraphs of Chapter 2 to the end of Chapter 1. They fit better there time-wise. Then, sStart Chapter 2 with "Excitement filled ..."
Really good, easy-to-follow writing, plotting and characterization so far. I get the sense Hank means wells/wants to do good but he doesn't understand the implications and there's going to be some chaos. I also like the references to the Persian tales and would be interested in seeing how those and any modern-day genie-like activity might fit in. Careful what you wish for, Hank.

Dean Lombardo
"Space Games"

Nick Poole2 wrote 1217 days ago

ARISE, AUTHONOMY GHOST!

Ease those weary, withered limbs from your coffin. Push away the stone from the mouth of the tomb.

You have one last task to perform. One last, sacred shelf to confer.

Whether you were plugger, spammer, gusher or troll, whether you flirted or fought in the forum or beavered away in the shadows, now is the time for your resurrection.

One last time. Marshall your strength, muster the last vestiges of your power and carry out your final Authonomy act:

Back my book, MIRROR IN THE SKY.

Then, only then, you may rest easy in your Authonomy grave.

Nick Poole2 (formerly known as NickP)

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