Book Jacket

 

rank 5925
word count 10805
date submitted 12.01.2010
date updated 16.01.2010
genres: Fiction, Fantasy, Young Adult, Come...
classification: universal
incomplete

Jubilee

JL Simpson

Jubilee Dunn has a secret...and it might just save the world. Rogues, spies and Scottish lordlings abound as Miss Dunn takes Europe by storm.

 

Jubilee is the adopted daughter of a psychic and part time magician. When her mother decides to work full time on a daytime television talk show, Jubilee is sent to Europe to finish her education, but a dark and deadly team of assassins and hypnotists are threatening the world, and there are more important things than homework...

 
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tags

funny romantic magical fast-paced travel hypnotism scotland

on 5 watchlists

32 comments

 

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Shelby Z. wrote 833 days ago

This is a very different story. I like the way you start it off right away. It gets the reader's interest up.
Your words are simple but very well chosen to keep things creative.
Your pitch and title are good.
Good work on your book.
best wishes.

Shelby Z./Driving Winds

P.S. Please take a look at my pirate adventure Driving Winds, when you have a chance.

rikasworld wrote 833 days ago

I think this is very, very good indeed! Beautifully written and funny and the pacing is spot on. I'd buy it any day.
I have two niggles - Regency period is a bit earlier and Edinburgh is spelt like this, although it's pronounced like you've spelt it.
Love the idea of someone being more tone deaf than Bob Dylan.
What's a Dove bar by the way? Over here it's soap.
Great book. It's staying on my watchlist for future backing but it might be a week or two as my shelf is overflowing.

elmo2 wrote 835 days ago

i like this, read about the first five chapters, the initial summary was good, general enough while still introducing characters and story line, I like the odd characters, psychic (apparently a real one) and magician, the first person narrative in the first chapters helps to establish the young woman's, Jublilee, character, which seems youthful and appropriately willful, but yet caring and somewhat guarded, and it is Jublilee's willingness to move on and participate in her adventure I think that brings the reader along, and the seeming odd circumstances are left and accepted as plausible becuase she is matter of fact enough about them, the chage to the handsome young man's point of view puts a twist in the story, and it seems like it keeps the story from bogging down early on and i am sure it will be useful later on to be able to alternate points of view for the story's sake, i wanted to know more and that is always a good sign in a story

Tod Schneider wrote 866 days ago

Greetings. I just finished chapter 1. It's delightful! Really clean writing, plenty of humor...I think this will be a winner with teens at very least, and perhaps a broader audience. Nicely done!
--Tod Schneider
The Lost Wink

jlsimpson wrote 870 days ago

Thanks Lisa for both the kind words and the backing. And the starring.
Jubilee is my next big edit project...

Lisa Lawton wrote 870 days ago

You've done it again, JL.
I actually had goose-bumps running down my arms and legs when Nedda read aloud the card from the envelope. Now that's what I call an author who knows how to captivate their readers. This is seriously great writing and is going to snuggle-up to your other book on my shelf. Again, 6*s.

Lisa. x

liberscriptus wrote 883 days ago

Read what you've got posted, and I think you're off to a good start! The opening chapter really grabs the reader by introducing the psychic element, and the narrative is quite well-written. I think it's interesting how you've thrown so many pop culture references in, and I think it really ads an element of realism. The dialogue flows naturally, and Jubilee seems like a very interesting and familiar MC - someone we can all relate to, especially with her attitude about school, and it's a lot of fun to read about her interactions with T.C. Good luck with the rest of it!

Cheers,
M.
Astral Sea: The Pandora Project

JKass wrote 886 days ago

A quick start, makes it hard to put down. Jubilee is a powerful MC and well put together. This book is full of promise, adding it to my W/L so I can come back to it when I have more time. Highly starred!

Lorri wrote 1581 days ago

A nice loud and lively start!

I did note though a typo.. rediculous - ridiculous.

Other than that, a fun and entertainng read, and wow... what a life!

Funny too! Especially the last line.

backed

Lorri (Euphoria - When a demon deals drugs there are no repeat customers)

Fromante wrote 1584 days ago

Hello JL, I am not qualified to give constructive advice and constructive criticism. However, I am qualified to say what Iike, and I like your writing and Jubilee. Good Luck. Sorry I am late commenting. Just give your book another slow read through and correct those little niggling things, you will see them when you sit back and think about it.
Norman.

lionel25 wrote 1603 days ago

Ms Simpson, I liked your first chapter. Good mix of dialogue and narrative. I have one insignificant nit. Terms like "dog eared" are usually hyphenated as "dog-eared."

Happy to back this.

Joffrey (The Silver Spoon Effect)

Bradley Wind wrote 1615 days ago

JL!
It looks like you've given up on Authonomy...that's too bad. I think Your short pitch is well done (your long could use some extra spice though... but still attractive.)
Hope you return one day!
Best of luck to you.
-=Bradley

Jesse Hargreave wrote 1624 days ago

Backed January 24.

Jesse - Savant

klouholmes wrote 1645 days ago

Hi JL, Your characters have immediacy and presence as they well-rendered through Jubilee’s POV. Her wacky situation and journey held my attention. The narrator waiting at the airport was mysterious since she apparently changed flights? I was a little confused there. Her hiding scene and hearing her mother’s name certainly heightened thing and launched the plot. The writing is vivid and exciting before that happened! Shelved – Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)

jhoom wrote 1645 days ago

I love Jubilee's voice. She is a delightful character. Good luck with this!

Beval wrote 1646 days ago

Excellent pitch and i'm taken with your young heroine, she is a character with plenty of promise.
The whole back ground is entertaining, I hope this does well.

Sandie Newman wrote 1647 days ago

This is excellent, the cover sort of reminds me of Julianne Moore and the pitch totally hooked me. The opening is brilliant, entertaining and the pace is perfect, nice and fast with witty dialogue and hilarious lines, I love the counting of the excalamation marks. Brilliant brilliant stuff which will do well. Backed with pleasure.

Sandie
The Crown of Crysaldor

Adam_Landau wrote 1648 days ago


A very engaging read with a great main character and superb central conceit. The langauge and narrative zip along nicely delivering on the promise of the pitch and would no doubt do very well with its target market. Good luck with this - deserves to do well.

paxie wrote 1648 days ago

JL Simpson

Fabulous premise, dont think I've come across anything like it on the site....

I made a couple of notes.....

rediculous......comes up as 'ridiculous' on UK spell check....

I didn't think Nedda's line.....'We have a very very special show today' suited her profile.....I imagined a much more snappy professional opening line....ie.....'We have a special show today'....because all her other lines were kind of 'bullet point'.......(my view only)....

The audience got really quiet really fast.......sounds slow motion for a fast action scene....
The audience got quiet fast..........much more urgent.....

I found the dialogue simple, yet clever, in so much as it moved the plot forward on an even keel with the narrative. A compelling blend...

Shelved with pleasure....I enjoyed the read......

bookjunky wrote 1649 days ago

J.L.,

"Jubilee" is an immensely engaging protagonist and you deliver her tale with a sure nd confident hand. Well done and on my bookshelf.
If you get a chance, would you mind checking out my book, "The Wild, Wild Quest"? I always appreciate the comments/feedback.

Best of luck,
J. A. Johnson
(The Wild, WIld Quest)
http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=13246

MKEthridge wrote 1650 days ago

This is a fun read so far! Backed

C W Bigelow wrote 1650 days ago

JL - entertaining first chapter - well written and Jubilee seems to have a likeable, sagely, humorous wit! Shelved earlier. CW (To Save the Sun)

J. G. Reynolds wrote 1652 days ago

Hi JL
I love your book, it's so funny and has a wonderful protagonist. Finely detailed observation, a really refreshing left field look at the world and written with marvellous ease of style. You deserve to do really well, it's great. Good luck with it. Backed.
Hope you're tip top,
JG Reynolds (Head, Heart & Trousers).

M.A. Hoak wrote 1652 days ago

Fun story and a good read. Just one thing..."Reknowed" psychic should be "renowned." :)

Mairi Graham wrote 1652 days ago

A great first chapter. The writing is very well done, the tone a perfect reflection of the consciousness it's filtered through, so you get a clear picture of Jubilee. i particularly liked the repetition and variations on 'point.' I have this on my shelf. Good luck with it. It's really good.

Barry Wenlock wrote 1653 days ago

Hi! If I'd had the time, I would have read this through to the end and would certainly recommend it to others. Best of luck with it. Barry (Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys)

Shayne Parkinson wrote 1653 days ago

Such *fun* that I read at a sitting all you've posted . The wonderful opening is bizarre and charming at once, and all through the posted chapters the humour is affectionate rather than snarky. Jubilee (I actually used to know someone called Jubilee) is great - self-possessed, and obviously well-versed in handling weirdness. She also has a very believable response to hotness :-)

There was a typo or two - I noticed an "it's"/"its" at one point - but I'm afraid I was enjoying myself too much to note just where. Also, it might be worth having someone do a Britpick pass for you - for instance, you have British and Irish people saying "math" instead of "maths", and if Jamie wanted to see the midnight sun he'd probably think of Scandinavia rather than Alaska (although it does make a good chat-up line, which is perhaps why he said it :-) ).

Shelved, of course - and I'd love to know what happens next!

AnnabelleP wrote 1653 days ago

Hi JL :)
I love the name 'Jubilee', it's great. I was hooked from the opening and I think your target readers will be, too. There's lots here for them to identify with I think. It's really funny in parts and I read more than I meant to. Jubilee is a great character, I really can *feel* what she's thinking, does that make sense? This is the sort of book I'd have loved as a YA and it's going on my shelf. I wish I knew someone from the right age-group to show it to. Good luck with this! On my shelf.
Bests,
AP
(Matty McDuff)

Jared wrote 1653 days ago

Excellent pitches and a wonderful opening chapter. I've read four chapters now and this is perfectly aimed at your target audience. I'd expected the fantasy element, but not the humour - please add "comedy" to your classification list. An entertaining and well written story and a likeable main character, this works very well. Backed.
Jared.

soutexmex wrote 1653 days ago

Gotta agree with Simon on your book. SHELVED!

I can use your comments on my book when you get a chance. Cheers!

JC
The Obergemau Key

Simon Swift wrote 1653 days ago

I love the pitch! It is succinct and hints at a great story to follow! Having dipped into the story so far this is backed up and I am looking forward to reading more of this! There is more right? Backed in anticipation!
Simon

Suzannah Burke wrote 1654 days ago

Hi and YES! note the exclamation point, although in this instance it is well deserved.

You write pithy fast paced and enjoyable dialogue, and the descriptions of the audience and the relationships between all the pivotal characters are still causing me to chuckle.

BACKED with pleasure.
Suzannah Burke
Dudes Down Under

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