Book Jacket

 

rank 5847
word count 72050
date submitted 21.02.2010
date updated 26.06.2012
genres: Fiction, Romance, Fantasy
classification: moderate
incomplete

Wolf and the Riddle

Kasie Stadig

Captain Liam Magnus seeks to repay a debt owed to an old friend and finds magic and mischief in the shape of a woman.

 

Continuing to edit, loading a chapter's worth at a time. Made Part Two a seperate novel and expanded the first half, taking excellent advice from this site! Complete version no longer uploaded. Captain Liam Magnus is a successful English privateer, but, momentarily short of crewmen, he needs help when an old friend contacts him after his daughter is kidnapped. He finds that help from an unexpected source, a girl who has ties to his ship, the Sphinx's Riddle. Rowan Harrington is far more than the simple peasant that she seems, and he finds her mystery intriguing in ways he is not accustomed to. She involves him, his crew, and his reluctant passangers Nick and Bianca in more adventure than even he expects, but what does the moon have to do with it?

 
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captain, galleon, kidnap, magic, moon, ocean, pirate, pirates, privateer, romance, sailing, sea, ship, silver, voyage, werewolf, werewolves

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     Rowan stayed out of sight for the rest of the day.  Liam kept unobtrusive watch for her, but midday passed and evening came without glimpse of a single freckle. 

     There were a hundred reasons she might choose to stay out of sight.  It was hardly unknown for new sailors and inexperienced passengers to be stricken with seasickness they could only wish was terminal.  She might have been shaken by Mr. Tony’s earlier verbal attack.  On second thought, he doubted that was it; the memory of the man’s face when she picked him up still caused a mad desire to chuckle.  She might be embarrassed by her own unwomanly actions, though he didn’t think being womanly was one of her major concerns.

     Liam pulled off the expensive but worn green coat once appropriated from a wealthy French slaver, who was now neither wealthy nor a slaver.  He tossed it aside, threw his equally worn hat down on the deck next to it, and paced, the thick leather soles of his boots thudding on the well-scrubbed planks with every step.  He wasn’t worried.  Truly. 

     Smelling the savory tang of the crew’s supper stew, Liam replaced his tattered finery and sought out his other two passengers.  He found them under the protective raven wing of Jones Smith, where they were avidly listening to a tale of the Riddle’s last battle with another French slave ship.  Nicholas was helping Liam’s first mate check the sails and tighten any knots that needed attention and Bianca listened to the story with her light hazel eyes wide.

     She always had liked Jones despite her loathing of pirates, privateers, and Liam’s crew in particular.  The man could be anywhere from ten years younger to ten years older than Liam, but his polite and protective manner made him a fatherly figure, and he treated her like the most delicate of china, though in Liam’s view she more resembled hard, faceted quartz.

     Liam waited for Jones to finish.  No one could tell a tale with quite his panache, his voice rising and falling with the action from a low, dangerous whisper to a humor-filled roar.  “ . . . an’ th’ slaves freed themselves.  They swarmed up on deck, armed with weapons from th’ men below, an’ joined th’ crew.  Most of ‘em were weak, starved an’ sick, but they fought like angry bears.  One youn’un still had paint on ‘is face, a chief’s son or some such, an’ he got hold of th’ spear ol’ Captain Godenot had in ‘is cabin, taken as a souvenir t’ show off t’ his dandy friends.  Th’ boy was screamin’ a language I’ve never heard, an’ sayin’ things I know I’m glad I didn’t unnerstand.  The others, men and women both, even a few little ‘uns hardly bigger ‘n monkeys, got behind him and started screamin’ along with him, waving th’ swords and guns they’d taken from those they were s’posed t’ call master.  The French were so outnumbered they just threw away their weapons an’ dropped where they stood.”

     “What happened after the ship was taken?” Bianca asked, breathless.

     Stopping with his hands on a stubborn rope, Jones stared off into the distance in fond memory.  “Well, our Cap’n has hisself dead set against a man ownin’ another man, an’ has no use an’ no sympathy f’r those as would make themselves rich on another’s sweat an’ blood.”  Leaning a little farther forward, the dark, wiry man grinned viciously, his black eyes glittering.  “When th’ crew all refused our gen’rous offer to join the Riddle, we locked th’ dogs in their own brig, shackled like the slaves.  A couple of th’ slaves spoke some English or Spanish, enough to talk sense to.  A few o’ the young bucks hadn’t anythin’ left t’ return to an’ decided to take up th’ sailorin’ life.  Twenty of our crew chose t’ stay on the French ship and take ‘er for the King.  We took our share of ‘er valuables onto th’ Riddle an’ left ‘em th’ food, enough t’ make it back t’ Africa with those as wanted t’ return.”  A wicked light gleamed in Jones’s expression.  “The slavers went with ‘em.  Don’t know what they did with ‘em in th’ end, an’ I don’t want to.  I do hear tell that Africa be loaded with cannibals.”

     Bianca shuddered, half in horror, half in delight.  Liam cleared his throat.  “Excuse me, Mr. and Mrs. Babcock,” he said.  “There is a meal prepared, and since you are our guests as well as our passengers, it is only right to extend invitation for you to join me in my cabin for evening repast.”

     He could still speak “properly” and formally, and sometimes in times of stress it slipped out if he wasn’t thinking, but it felt falsely stiff on his tongue compared to the more comfortable vernacular he had grown accustomed to.  Jones gave him a too-eloquent roll of the eyes; Liam gave a mock bow that made the man chuckle.

     Bianca’s small face stayed neutral while her husband accepted the invitation with equally formal speech.  Dropping his moneyed manners with the impatient flick of an eyelid, Liam inclined his head to his first mate.  “Well, Mr. Smith, as it seems yer short a cabin for th’ moment, ye are more than welcome t’ join us.  T’would be a pleasure to have ye.”

     Jones gave his captain a swift, mischievous smile.  “Nay, Cap’n.  I’ll eat with th’ other men.  Best they don’t think I’m favored,” he explained with a dark twinkle.

     The bastard was deliberately leaving him alone with this pair?  He thought about threatening to have him keelhauled, but Jones would only laugh at him.  “Aye, sir.  Best not,” he snarled.  With one last black look, he led Nicholas and Bianca to his cabin.

     Rowan had left it neater than she found it, going so far as to straighten his bunk.  Her bag lay tucked underneath, her heavy boots standing next to it.  As there were only two chairs, he sat on the folded covers, holding his plate in his lap.

     He thought the smell of food might bring the girl out, but she remained in hiding.  Bianca gave Liam a long look as he sat poking at his food, barely hearing Nicholas’s discussion on the merits of every kind of ship on the ocean, including a list of what seemed to be every pirate ship ever in existence.

     At least his passengers ate hungrily.  Bianca was used to more elegant fare, but she voiced no complaint about the less-than-appetizing mess on her plate.  She looked pale and drawn, with a gauntness that spoke of too little food for too long a time. 

     A sudden flash of anger tightened his stomach.  He hoped that someday Leopold would discover who had taken his small, pretty daughter, and that he, Captain Liam Magnus, would be there to bear witness.

     Catching Nicholas’s look, Liam read his own thoughts in the boy’s innocent face, which seemed less innocent since they’d retrieved his wife.  It would be a joyful sight; even if you didn’t know he had a more exciting history than captaining an occasional merchant vessel, Leopold Gower was a bloodcurdling vision when his blood was up.

     Those thoughts set him wondering what the less pleasant Harrington sibling had done to his own sister to inspire such anger, and not a little fear.  He wasn’t known for his vivid imagination, but the images streaming unwanted in his mind sent his guts twisting.  If Leopold ever found the man, Liam was going to help.

     Their meal was mostly silent.  Bianca finished two helpings of the stew, watching Liam through most of her second plateful.  Finally she dropped her fork with a clang. 

“Liam, if you’re that worried, go and find her.  She must be hungry.”

     “I’m not worried,” Liam retorted automatically.  He slowly rose to his feet under her lightning stare.  “You’re right.  She should eat.”

     Bianca calmly finished her last bite as Nicholas scrambled away from the table, awkward in his eagerness to please both his dinner companions.  The pair followed Liam to the door to join his search uninvited.  Liam wouldn’t tell them, but he didn’t mind the company; he wasn’t sure he’d know what to say to Miss Harrington if he found her and another female at his back gave him a bit more confidence. 

     They started on deck, walking from bow to stern to ask his men about any sightings, except for Tony who fled from a single searching look.  Nobody had seen her since she’d gone below, so they took the search there.

     The first two decks they checked were empty.  For a few minutes, Liam was afraid that Tony in his illogical hatred had thrown her overboard, but in the end she wasn’t hard to find.  All the explorers had to do was step into the cargo hold.

     The space had gone from disordered chaos to efficient perfection.  All the materials

the ship needed were within easy reach—rope coiled neatly, extra canvas rolled into a compact space, tools hanging from hooks or piled conveniently, food separated with the inedible thrown out.  Assorted booty taken from carefully targeted ships, namely those owned and/or captained by those Liam didn’t like, was similarly sorted.  In addition to the rest, lists detailing everything were tacked up on the wall, one for the goods and one for the necessities. 

     Taking one down, Liam angled it towards a burning lantern, his two tagalongs clustered around to read it with him.  It was written in a neat, squarish, feminine hand, the cultured script speaking of education, the perfect calculations and detailed accounts speaking of more education than most ever received, especially women.

     “She’s good,” Nicholas commented.  “She should work for your father, Bianca.”

     “I’ve picked up a bloody accountant,” Liam muttered.  It was . . . useful, he had to admit, but only to himself.

     They found the girl herself half hidden in a corner, curled up on a shipment of silks.  Liam thought she was asleep, but she spoke before they could quietly leave.  “You’re not angry, are you Captain?”

     Liam stopped in his tracks halfway out.  “Angry?  No, sweet.  Should I be?”

     “I touched your cargo without permission.”

     Liam aimed a raised eyebrow at his passengers, who left with faint smiles.  Returning to the shadowed corner, Liam could see Rowan’s eyes gleaming at him oddly bright.  “Look, lovely, if ye want to do more work than even m’ men are willing, do it without all the permission ye want, long’s you don’t hurt ye’self.”

     She sat up, still moving stiffly.  Something big and black slithered behind her eyes for a moment; when she blinked, it was gone, but she wouldn’t quite meet his gaze, keeping hers aimed more towards his chest.  “I’m sorry for the way I acted on deck today,” she said carefully.

     “The way you . . .”  He had to think what she might be apologizing for.  “That?  No sorry necessary.  It was impressive, sweetling, and the man had it coming.  Ye did nothing but earn th’ crew’s respect.”

     She studied him for a moment, measuring, and nodded.

     Liam moved a step closer, smelling a deeper mystery than he had at first suspected. 

“Methinks something dark lives somewhere in those pretty eyes o’ yours.  The men won’t forget it.”

     “You’ve no idea, Captain Magnus,” Rowan answered, her voice soft and heartbroken.

     It wasn’t the reaction he expected, and he even felt a momentary pang of guilt for trying to dig.  Not knowing what else to do, he lightened his tone.  “Come on up, sweet. 

Won’t be much food left if ye don’ hurry.”

     “Aye, Captain,” she answered, visibly forcing herself to brighten.  She followed him back topside, blinking dazzled at the sunset, an ocean of fire reflected off the waves.  It gleamed oddly in her eyes, giving them a yellowish cast for just a moment, then it was gone, leaving her looking tired and a little wan.

     As they crossed the deck, Liam watched his crew from the corners of his eyes, but his prediction proved true; the men showed her nothing but utter respect, a few going so far as to tip their hats.  The girl was just as polite in return, dipping a swift curtsy or giving a shy, girlish smile—so many faces for one average-sized female.

     The meal was simple, hard tack, dried meat, and fish cooked together with a bit of lime added for flavor, but Rowan ate hungrily, and finding a bit more appetite himself, Liam joined her.  They polished off the last of the meal between them, and it seemed a bit more satisfying the second time around.  Sitting back in his chair, Liam raised a bottle of sweet bombo for a swig.

     When he was done, Rowan held out her hand, her brows raised in a silent question. 

Liam handed the bottle over with a small shrug.  “It’s not sherry, sweet.  Ye may not find it palatable.”

     She gave him an impish wink and tipped the bottle for a long draught, draining a good

bit of it.  Handing it back, she licked her lips thoughtfully.  “It isn’t bad.  Not the best quality perhaps, but whoever spiced it had some talent.”

     Liam couldn’t think of anything but to stare.  She flashed him a quick grin and left the cabin.

     By the time he was composed enough to emerge himself, Bianca had retired to bed and Mr. Smith was shouting directions to Nicholas and, he was surprised to see, Rowan.  They were busy at the never-ending task of adjusting and tying off lines, Rowan copying her partner’s movements with some skill.  Liam watched for a few minutes, until stars began to appear. 

     Female pirates were hardly an unknown.

     Liam shook off the unbidden thought.

     He realized that he was tired, bone-deep weary, and even an overactive mind couldn’t stay it any longer.  Fleeting catnaps the night before had done little to alleviate the need for sleep.  Finding himself a nice, large coil of rope, Liam leaned back and kicked his legs out, pulling his hat down over his face.  The night would be cool but comfortable, hardly the worst to spend under the open sky.

     Someone nudged him with a toe.  Just dozing, he was ready to be annoyed until he pushed his hat up with one finger and cracked his eyes open to find Rowan standing over him.  “Captain, I am not going to take your cabin again, not all night.  The men will say you’ve gone soft.”

     “Then I’ll prove otherwise.”

     A frown battling to be a smile tugged at her lips.  “If you’re really that stubborn, there’s a perfectly comfortable chair in there.”

     “The men will talk then.”

     “Then I’ll prove otherwise.  Or at least make them pretend not to notice.”    

     A picture flashed behind his eyes—the girl holding a man easily time-and-a-half her weight in the air.  “Aye.  Ye could.”

     “Then shift yerself,” she said in a horrible imitation of rough pirate talk.  Liam laughed, a deep, full-throated sound that startled Nicholas, who was just passing on his way to a night’s rest.  Scrambling up, just outside the pleasant edge of wobbly legs from the extra bombo, Liam entered his cabin at her heels.

     She was already curled up in the chair.  Liam frowned.  “Lass, ye can’t sleep like that.  You’ll wake up an old woman, ‘specially with such a wound.  Yer doin’ wonderfully well; don’t ruin it on my account.”

     “This is perfect.”

     Stubborn little chit.  Shedding his hat, coat, and belt, leaving him clad in beige canvas trousers and a no-longer-white linen shirt, Liam sat on his bunk.  The old thing felt wonderful after the last days, but he couldn’t get past the quirk that was actually concerned for her well being.  She wouldn’t budge, he knew.  So . . . “It’s a squeeze, but there’s room for two,” he offered.

     The look that suggestion drew made him fear for his life.  “I’ll be good.  Hands to me’self,” he said hastily, palms held out at shoulder height.

     “You are a liar,” Rowan snorted.

     “Promise.”

     “Promise what?  That you’re a liar?”

     Liam grinned at her, waiting.  Finally, shifting uncomfortably, she huffed.  “You’re

just going to sit there and stare all night, aren’t you?”

     “’F I have to.”

     Face screwing up in an unsuccessful bid to hide a smile, Rowan relented.  “All right, but you sleep on the inside.  I want an open escape route.”

     “As m’lady wishes.”

     Curling up facing the wall, Liam didn’t bother to kick his boots off.  He was awake long enough to feel Rowan’s weight settle on the bed and her warm back press against his, but not much longer.

*

     It wasn’t the snoring that woke Rowan.  She was used to her brother, who did worse things at night than breath noisily.  It wasn’t the pervasive odor of bombo wafting from the open bottle and saturating the room, or the cool night whispering a breeze through the open window.  Liam’s heart beat steadily against her back, his slow breaths rising and falling in rhythm, his body heat seeping through both their shirts as a source of comfortable warmth.  None of it made her eyes slide open and her pulse speed with tension.

     It was the smell of blood.

     She’d noticed Liam rubbing his shoulder all morning.  He must have scraped himself when he hit the rough planks of the boat while they were fleeing her brother and his men.  It was an older smell, not fresh, but she could taste it on the back of her tongue like salty wine, heady and rich, making her stomach tighten.

     She had to get out.  Her mouth was damp with saliva, forcing her to swallow and spread the wonderfully meaty odor down her throat.  Moving slowly, she eased one leg off the bed, then the other.  When Liam didn’t stir and his soft, raspy snores remained steady, she pulled herself to the edge and slid off, an inch at a time.

     Still no response.  Relaxing, Rowan padded barefoot across the sudden close, humid stuffiness.  Opening the door an inch at a time, she crept outside and eased it closed behind her, freezing when it gave the slightest click.  Leaning against the door, she pressed her ear to the carved wood, but still Liam was lost in dark and dreams.  Relieved, she tiptoed up the stairs to the upper deck, away from the three men on duty.  If they noticed her, they were careful to ignore her.  She couldn’t keep the tiniest of smiles from curving her lips, for just a moment.

     Rowan took in gulps of salty ocean air, the smells wild enough to raise the hair on the back of her neck.  The swollen moon hung heavy in the sky, gilding the world silver and white.  It set her blood aflame, but the ship creaked and groaned under her feet, solid and real enough to shield her from the night.  Sitting on the well-scrubbed deck, she slid her legs between the rails and let them dangle, feeling the tickle of salt spray on her skin as the clean wind whipped at her skirt.  She watched the waves sparkle like living jewels all around and looked up at a sky filled with so many points of light that she ran out of words for the numbers.

     The day’s tension and emotion, so eroding to her self-discipline, faded with every rocking wave.  It was strange to feel so peaceful.  More than strange, it felt unnatural.  She’d lost the safety of her family’s arms too young, left alone with a twin who carried enough madness for two men.  When she was a little girl, the Sphinx’s Riddle, her grandfather’s great love, was the thing her mind fixed on as her ideal of freedom, fed by stories of the ship’s creation, and later of the adventures of her captain and crew.  Over years of using dreams of this ship as her only escape, they’d become real to her, at times more real than anything around her, and still this reality was a thousand times more than she could have imagined.

     She focused on that reality surrounding her, cradling her against the rest of the world.  The creaking and groaning of timbers should have sounded eerie; instead, the sounds were comfortable, serene, almost homey.  Closing her eyes, Rowan inhaled.  When new, the wood would have had a sharp, tingling scent.  Now it had matured into something richer and more subtle that wafted its way through her olfactory center and seemed to settle at the base of her spine.

     It wasn’t just the ship, either.  Her small crew was diverse of age, race, and background, and as a result was a group of jolly, fun-loving men, not at all matching the French, Spanish, and Dutch description of vicious, murderous, and in some documents cannibalistic criminals.  Mr. Tony wasn’t at all fond of her, but Thomas O’Hara was almost worshiping at her feet, and the others, Sebastian Kyle, Jamison Thorpe, Stephen Newton, Donatello Vasquez, and the first mate with the unlikely name of Jones Smith all ranged from politely considerate to friendly. 

     Then there was the captain, Liam Magnus.  He was too young to be part of her grandfather’s stories, but she’d heard of him, of course.  She listened to every bit of news of the Sphinx’s Riddle her brother’s men brought in, especially after she figured out why Roark was so interested, and the stories surrounding him were at least as unlikely as those of his predecessor.  The man seemed a perfect match for the ship, clever and quick, and dangerous to his enemies.

     And handsome.

     No, that was a bad way for her thoughts to go.

     “Cold to be out here all alone and lost in thought,” Liam’s voice floated out of the dark.

     Rowan’s chest constricted, her heart clamping down until her lungs froze.  She would never learn to be careful enough, no matter how many lessons life taught.  The pirate should never have been able to take her unawares, yet there he was, directly behind her, and she’d not sensed a single breath.  How had she survived life with her brother and the brutes he hired?  She should have been dead long ago.

     “No need to look so frightened, sweet.”  His voice was soft, almost worried.  “You’re as safe as it’s possible to be out on the water.”

     His scent washed over her; man, rum-and-honey based bombo, work, and, mostly, the concentrated odor of sea salt and ocean.  She didn’t look at him, afraid of what he’d see, but he sat beside her in a similar position to her unseemingly casual pose, his coat draped loosely over his shoulders.  Leaning his hatless head on the rail, he gave her a cockeyed grin, his shoulder-length coal-dust hair waving loose in the breeze.

     Arrogant, infuriating, domineering—how could the man be so appealing?  He wanted people to think that if he still had a mother, he’d sell her for a half empty bottle of grog, and still they followed him of their own free will, sailing proudly under his command.  They liked him.  It was distinctly odd, yet she felt herself getting caught up in whatever spell he wound about the people around him.

     She shook herself; such thoughts from one who was trained, at least in her early years, to be a proper lady.  “It’s beautiful,” she said, gesturing towards the moonlit waves.

     Liam’s eyes shifted outward, glinting with reflections of pale, silver-gold light.  “Aye. 

It is.  It’s been a long time since I’ve just sat and looked.”

     “I’m sorry if I woke you,” she murmured, her glance drawn to his face by the soft, unconscious wonder in his tone.

     “You?  It’d take more’n you.  Though it did get a bit chilled in there alone.  What happened?”  He grinned, but it didn’t match his serious eyes.  “Found that like so many others, ye couldn’t trust yerself to resist ol’ Captain Liam Magnus, eh?”

     He was teasing, that was all.  Rowan dropped her head.  She hadn’t meant to look at him anyway, so it wasn’t a retreat.  “No, I couldn’t.”

     She could feel the darkness in that one simple sentence chilling her throat.  Liam paused, uncertain, then apparently decided he’d imagined the deep ring in her voice.  “Sure ye want t’ stay out here?  Even in th’ Caribbean, the wind can bite comin’ off th’ water.”

     The irony pulled out a reluctant smile.  “I’m all right.  Thank you, Captain.”

     The next thing she felt was his coat slipping over her shoulders, tucked around her against the night chill. 

     It had been so long since she was in truly human company.  She couldn’t fight it any more; she felt her ice walls begin to crumble under the weight of buttons and thin, worn cloth.  Tears of fear and old hurt rose in her eyes, leaking past the uselessly melting barrier that struggled to hold them back.  She tried to turn away, but Liam was keen-eyed and aware.  “Eh, no need for that sort o’ thing.  ‘Tis a beautiful night, we’re floating free on the ocean, an’ nothin’ can touch us here.”  His arm wound around her shoulders companionably; laughing a little, Rowan leaned into it, though she didn’t mean to.  Bloody pirates, stealing everything from under your nose, even yourself.

*

     Rowan continued to stare out to sea, but at least the tears had stopped.  After a few minutes of silence during which Liam was careful not to notice that she did not pull out of his arms, she looked at him sidelong, searching his face.  The light reflected oddly in her eyes, turning the aquamarine a brilliant emerald shade.  Odd, but hardly unattractive.  “Captain Magnus?”

     “Hmmm?”

     “Why does Mrs. Babcock hate you so much?  Especially after you came here to rescue her?  Nicholas seems to like you, so you can’t have done anything too horrible to his wife.”

     Liam looked away, trying to decide on an answer.  The truth seemed easiest, even if the truth itself was a hard one.  “Bianca’s mother was murdered by pirates.  Bianca was young, but she was old enough to know, and to form a deep hatred for all of us.”

     “And being a privateer doesn’t matter.  You’re still a murdering pirate,” Rowan murmured.

     “Aye.  Letters of Marque are but a technicality, thin as paper.  We are all one, even though the man who killed Juliana Gower flew a flag red as the barrels of blood he spilled, interested in neither surrender nor prisoners,” Liam agreed, an edge of bitterness entering his voice.  “Even though she was murdered as an act of revenge against h . . .”  He stopped himself from saying too much.  “ . . . against someone else.”

     Liam didn’t think the tiny hesitation was obvious, but Rowan gave him a solemn, searching look.  “Against you?”

     “Partly.  I was . . . involved.”

     Rowan was silent for a time, swinging her legs in the air like a restless little girl in a too-big chair.  “How did you get involved with someone who would harm an innocent woman for revenge?  Did it have something to do with the Riptide?  Everyone knows he had the Riddle before you, and you were his first mate.  Did he have something to do with Mrs. Babcock’s mother?”

     Damn.  He should have expected the quickness.  Or had he done it on purpose, knowing she would pick up the tiny hints?  Liam gazed at her open, honest face out of the corner of his eye and still wasn’t sure what made him speak.  Perhaps he sensed that she had already guessed, perhaps it was something else.  “Best not to mention this to anyone.  Bianca has no idea, and I don’t want Nicholas to know; his misplaced sense of honor wouldn’t let him keep silent.  The Riptide was—is—Leopold Gower, Bianca’s father.  He had no choice but to send me to fetch his daughter. He didn’t want wrong connections to be made by the wrong people to the wrong moments in his past.  Me men weren’t happy, most of them have no idea that th’ rich, mostly respected merchant from the Colonies is a pirate whose name they invoke weekly.  It wasn’t easy t’ talk ‘em into it, but I owe the Riptide more than I can repay in a lifetime, or two.  He was th’ man who gave me m’ life and my ship.”

     Her jewel-hued eyes were wide.  “What?  Really?  Her father?  And she doesn’t know?”

     “Don’t say anything.  She’d go mad.”

     “I would imagine.”  Rowan cuddled unconsciously closer.  “What kind of low coward would kill a wife and mother?”

     Liam closed his eyes against the memories, his jaw clenched.  “His name was Girard Craven.  He was captain of the Red Death, a ship feared by everyone, other pirates as much as any honest sailor.  He had . . . done some things an’ got a price on his head, one that his fellow pirates were particularly keen to be the ones to collect.”  A sneer of anger and disgust bared his teeth.  “Riptide knew where he would be.  His ship was there, we sank it, but he’d gotten word of the bounty, as well as the old “friend” who planned to collect, and wasn’t aboard.  While we were chasing crimson shadows, Craven took his revenge, taking Juliana Gower just before Leopold managed to make it home.”      

     It still made him sick.  “Bianca was there.  She was the first to find Juliana’s body.  Bianca looks very much like her, you know, except for her eyes.  She has Riptide’s eyes . . . Juliana was even smaller, though, always delicate . . .”  He trailed off, his throat working.  “Riptide caught him and killed him, his last act as a privateer.  He retired to raise his daughter.” 

     Rubbing his forehead, Liam shook his head sadly.  “I think he lost his taste for it all.  I had been his first mate for two years, and was elected captain on his advice.”

     After thirteen years it was still hard to talk about.  Rowan shifted uncomfortably, quiet for a time.  “How did you end up on the Sphinx’s Riddle in the first place?” she asked after a long stretch of tense silence.

     The question was an utterly transparent attempt at a subject change, and Liam flushed with a pleasant kind of gratitude.  Smiling, he began his tale.

     Rowan listened without interruption.  He told her the whole sordid lot of it, from a titled father who disappeared and a mother who couldn’t support him, finally dying of fever, leaving him alone at the age of eight.  At ten, he stowed away on a ship bound for the New World, and by eleven, he was a cabin boy and powder monkey for a cruel pirate captain, until Leopold Gower, then an English privateer known only as the Riptide, encountered him in Port Royal, recognized his potential, and took him in.

     His audience didn’t say anything when he was done, just went back to staring at the water, but she seemed satisfied.  After a while she grew drowsy, her weight settling steadily more firmly against him until her eyes closed.

     Liam felt heavy and slow himself.  He thought about carrying her back to his cabin, but in the end it was too much work.

 

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junetee wrote 357 days ago

Wolf and the Riddle.

Wow this jumps straight in the deep end - no pun intended. Right from the first chapter.
This is a great pirate adventure. Its written with great imagination, and visuals.
Its romantic and emotional. Ideal for the ladies as well. What more could we want?
Well done, great ideas and writing skills. highly starred
junetee
FOUR CORNERS.book one.The Rock Star.

Kevin Alex Baker wrote 1007 days ago

Kasie,

Oh man, I'm enjoying this. You weave this tale with an imaginative ease, and you've got some great characters to play with in this sandbox you've created. Wolf and the Riddle reads like a winner! I normally offer some kind of critique, but I've got none here.

Nice work! Backed! Looking forward to your thoughts on Head Games!

Kevin Alex Baker
Head Games

greeneyes1660 wrote 1044 days ago

Kasie, I stayed up til 4:30 am to read this amazing novel. What unbelievable surprises...So much more then gold and trinkets...This is the true treasure. Your Mc's are so well developed as is your storyline...so many unexpected twists.

This is a voyage that takes us on an imaginative, intense, intrigueing, romantic, magical journey. Your pace is perfect, your tension building is superb and this just has something for everyone.

I was truly swept away..I loved all your cast of characters, each were endearing and I found myself equally attached and interested in their storylines. You should be very proud of yourself this is a WINNER...Backed without a doubt Patricia aka Columbia Layers of the Heart P.S Great pitch thank you for not giving away to much, and letting us find the surprise in the middle on our own

delhui wrote 1102 days ago

Dear Kasie --

There's something inherently romantic and compelling about pirate adventures, and you have captured that spirit well. Your characterization is strong, easily defining your primary heroes so that the reader never becomes confused in what is for many of us a strange world. Your female characters are especially well-drawn; it's nice to see a change from the typical, bodice-ripping, chest-heaving empty-headed girl to women that have brains & don't just pretty up the story.

Thanks for the chance to read your adventure, and happy to back you on your way! -- Delhui, The Long Black Veil

patio wrote 215 days ago

Wow, you this good. The descriptions are so strong I could feel and see what exactly was going on

Max stars

Lenny Banks wrote 275 days ago

Hi Kasie, I read chapter 5. This is a gripping story, if you like pirate books or films you are going to love this. I like the way you have twisted mystery and reveal into the story line and the characters are very real. I liked the dialogue, its something I struggled with as I didn't wnat to come over as racist when what I really wanted to do was tell the story. This is good work and should find a willing audience well done.

Kindest Regards and Best Wishes
Lenny Banks - Tide and Time: At The Rock.

revteapot wrote 321 days ago

This is good. I like the beginning, the way you drop me in in the heart of the action, without leaving me confused (and I am easily confused) nor over-burdening me with back-story or flash-backs.
"He might have made an exception ... simple presence. " - sentence a bit clunky, I think.
    “Yes.”. - more full-stops than you need.
"tatter-souled " love this phrase! (may steal it!)
"Unfortunately, some of my men ... It can’t be done, mate." I think you've lost his accent during this speech.

All in all this is very good, and had I more time, I'd happily read more.

Lindsay
A Priest's Tale

Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 325 days ago

Kasie,
An adventure on the high seas with a spunky protagonist named Rowan on a rescuse mission to free a kidnapped beauty. What a premise for a rollicking good read. You have imaginative metaphors worth mention, such as, "nor did the boy's scimitar gaze stab into a guard," "transformed...to a creature sharp-toothed as a badger," and "a tatter-souled privateer." The narrative is rife with action shots, the dialogue true to character. Thank you so much for sharing.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

janbeelandman wrote 332 days ago

Hi Kasie

I read the first chapter. Basically good stuff. Not unlike Pirates of the Caribbean. You obviously have writing skills and talent.

As a writer of short stories I tend to have trouble with the pace of novels. Yours is no exception. For me it is on the long side. I think it would improve greatly if you were a little briefer.

Sydney Smith, a very popular man of letters in his time, once wrote: “In composing, as a general rule, run your pen through every other word you have written; you have no idea what vigor it will give to your style."

This may sound like an exaggeration, but I once had to crop a story of 4,000 words down to 1,500 and managed to do so without deleting any essentials.

Altogether a pleasant read, liberally starred and left on the WL.

jbl

DWBrown wrote 332 days ago

Read through chapter one; good story. You did a great job developing Liam's character.

Suggestions: Chapters are pretty long and on this site, you could lose people...
Long pitch mispelled to...the second word in the first paragraph.
Sixth paragraph hard to understand He hadn't seen Bianca until-recently-Gower....I assume you were meaning in Gower? Not sure...
I like your story and gave it many stars; it's also on my watchlist for more reading.

JMF wrote 338 days ago

I'm here for our reading swap and I have completed the first two chapters. I have to say that this type of story is not one I would necessarily choose in a store, but it certainly is an action-packed adventure. You have obviously spent a great deal of time editing your book. In the chapters I read I did not notice any errors of punctuation or typos, although I'm no editor!
I did find the first chapter slightly long and I think by trimming it slightly you would increase the pace and make it a little more straight forward to read. This is just my personal opinion and others may not agree! I also found it strange when Liam's pirate dialect was lost - it is actually easier to read without the dialect, but if using it, I think you need to keep it throughout.
'Liam hung back to give Nick desperate eyes.' This sentence and the one following it did not make sense to me. I did read them several times!
All in all an enjoyable read.
Best of luck with your writing.
Julia
Shadow Jumper

Charlie James wrote 352 days ago

Hi, Kaisie,

This is the sort of thing that is right up my alley. As such, it it is difficult to offer criticism generally because I am automatically bias towards the genre. I like a good swashbuckle so can't really say if the story has legs. I think it probably does, but perhaps I'm just a little bit too pro the style? In any event, good solid Errol Flynn derring do.

What I can comment on is the style. I think here an edit might be helpful to remove a level of description, sometimes it seems a little over-described; you use three words when one will do, or repeat the same thing a couple of ways.

The sort of things i mean are

"The infuriating pirate walked away with a stiff-legged turnabout"

"Nick drew himself up as tall as he could stand though he knew his gangly limbs and inherently gentle features were anything but menacing"

Also, some of the dialogue seems odd. At times Liam is speaking very piratey with lots of 'get thee t' pit' stuff and then you get “Yes.  I am a coward.  I am a coward and I am proud of it,”... “But I am also not a fool.  It can’t be done.  Not like this.  If we could get the Riddle close enough, come in unseen by night, we could blast the place to bits.  But that would be the end of the lovely Bianca, if not the gold.  If I had a full crew, we could come over the walls under cover of dark, if we waited for the new moon more than a fortnight away, and possibly surprise the guards enough that we’d only lose half me men.”  it seems inconsitent and takes focus away from the story. Personally, I'd drop the 'by eck' stuff. Also, I think the use of 'ye' is a bit off kilter between Liam and Nick, I think, and down quote me on this, that it was the sort of terminology used with a superior or equal. In the same way that he in 'ye old oak' was actually pronounced 'the old oak' etc.

I also got lost a could of times with it being Liam, then the captain etc. a bit of consistency might help the flow. This, and the description stuff above, I think, distracts from the action, I just wanted you to get to the action, a trim might give it a bit more zing.

Hope this helps. I think this has got potential and an edit could make it very sparky. The caveat i must give is that all the above might be complete bollocks. As I said, I have a soft spot for this type of thing so am a little simplistic and set in my ways.

Good luck with it.

CJ

junetee wrote 357 days ago

Wolf and the Riddle.

Wow this jumps straight in the deep end - no pun intended. Right from the first chapter.
This is a great pirate adventure. Its written with great imagination, and visuals.
Its romantic and emotional. Ideal for the ladies as well. What more could we want?
Well done, great ideas and writing skills. highly starred
junetee
FOUR CORNERS.book one.The Rock Star.

rikasworld wrote 360 days ago

There are so many good books on this site and this is most definitely one of them! Packed with convincing, exciting action and a believable background. The real strength is the characters and their relationships, interactions and dialogue. Liam's way of speaking works perfectly and viewpoints from Nicholas and Bianca are convincing and engaging. All the characters have well defined personalities already and I think Nicholas is starting to change and develop even in the early chapters. Rowan's a real kick-ass too. Back stories work well. Love it when Liam calls them 'pets'. He's a very attractive pirate. Pirates are fashionable at the moment and I would think this is eminently publishable. Lots of stars and I will back, once I've cleared my backlog (sorry, no pun intended). If you want comments on later chapters let me know. I'll read on anyway when I have a moment.

Scott Toney wrote 530 days ago

Kasie,

You have a rather interesting premise here and a great, descriptive, writing style. I'm gladly rating this book six stars. Thanks for the enjoyable read!

Have a great day!

Scott, The Ark of Humanity

CarolinaAl wrote 727 days ago

I read your first chapter a month ago. I read your second chapter today.

General comments: A compelling, emotionally rich chapter. An endearing main character ... well fleshed out in this chapter. Good visuals. Good tension. Good pacing.

Specific comments on the second chapter:
1) Readers seldom read a book straight through. When they pause, they normally stop at the end of a chapter. As a result, at the beginning of each chapter we must assume that the reader has been away for a while (sometimes for a long while) and must quickly reorient the reader. We must tell them 'who' the narrator is and 'where' and 'when' the current scene is taking place. You have 'who' covered. It's Bianca. Now we need to quickly learn 'where' and 'when' the scene is occuring.
2) 'His feelings ran to deep to be faked.' The first 'to' should be 'too.'
3) 'Caressing it like a lover' is cliche. Consider writing the same action, but in a more unique way.
4) 'She felt herself go pale ... ' Try to avoid using the word 'felt.' Just describe the feeling so the reader can experience it along with the character. When you do this, the reader will be drawn deeper into your story and 'she felt' will be implied.
5) 'Causing pain to another made her feel sick ... ' Try to avoid using the word 'feel.' Just describe the feeling so the reader can experience the sickness along with the character. When you do this, the reader will be more closely involved in your story and character. There are more cases where you use 'feel.'
6) 'Hand picked' is one word.
7) 'Marching up to Rowan, the blonde sailor gave his companion a dirty look ... ' Blonde = female. Blond = male.
8) 'Soft as butter' is cliche. Consider writing the same idea, but in a fresh way.
9) 'Like slop before pigs' is cliche. Consider using a more unique similie.

I hope this critique helps. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest.

Please consider "Savannah Fire" when you reshuffle your bookshelf at the end of the month.

Have a sensational day.

Al

BeachEcho wrote 728 days ago

Not my normal read, but an excellent story never-the-less.

CarolinaAl wrote 755 days ago

I read your first chapter.

General comments: A gripping start to what appears to be an exciting adventure. Interesting, quirky main characters. Good world building. Clever wit. Vivid descriptions Atmospheric. Good tension. Good pacing.

Specific comments on the first chapter:
1) Hyphenate 'sharp toothed.'
2) You alternate between Nicolas and Nick. I would prefer that you only use one name for the young man.
3) Hyphenate 'well armed.'
4) "Listen, luv, I don't think ye realize who yer dealing with," Liam sneered with his usual easy arrogance. Period after 'with.' The only time the last sentence of dialogue is punctuated with a comma is when it is followed by a dialogue tag (tells who said something). 'Liam sneered' is clearly not a dialogue tag, so the last sentence of dialogue should be punctuated with a period.
5) Are you aware that the chapter repeats itself?

I hope this critique will help you further polish your all important first chapter. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest.

Would you please take a look at "Savannah Fire?"

Have a splendid day.

Al

Intriguing Trails wrote 765 days ago

The Wolf and the Riddle
Fiction, 3rd person

A pirate story!

The premise is exciting, adventure with a mystery in a swashbuckling pirate tale! Wide readership guarenteed!

Mechanics, excellent. I didn't see any issues at all. Very professional as far as I could tell.

The pacing, IMO, a bit slow for this genre'. I read the first half of Ch 1, and while it is good, there is a lot of telling as opposed to showing. Lots of back story here that pulled me out of the flow. Never felt the breeze in my face or heard the flapping of sails. The focus was on the recollections of how the characters came to be where they are and what the characters seemed to be. Show me with actions, not words. I think this story has an awesome plot. It just needs to get out of port and sail!

There is some good dialog.

I like the twist to the plot at the end of Ch 1, "the very man who'd gotten her into this mess." Good hook.

I think with some polish this novel will be top-notch. The author demonstrates some terrific skill, good imagination for a nice tight plot. It certainly shows promise.
Raechel
Echo

PCreturned wrote 770 days ago

Hi Kasie,

I finally managed to get time to look at your book. Sorry it took a few days. :(

I'll comment as I read since I find that the easiest way to keep track. Please don't be offended by any suggestions. After all, they will just be my thoughts. You can always ignore me if you think I'm wrong or stupid. ;)

(Sorry in advance for any typos, but my keyboard’s a bit knackered:()

Chapter 1: Hmmm I wonder what Nicholas is staring at so hard. He seems absorbed by something. Curious.

I've a tiny suggestion here. I think, occasionally, you don't need to explain so much. eg in "Rubbing his forehead irritably, Liam cursed..." the reader can figure out he's irritable from the action alone. So I think "Rubbing his forehead, Liam cursed..." works better.

Reading on... Hmmm there are hints Liam's caught up in some venture he wants no part of. Intriguing. And he really doesn't want Nicholas along, so why did he bring the boy? Oho now I see why. They're out to rescue Nicholas's wife. And it seems she hates Liam. There are so many things that can go wrong here. Good. ;)

Looks like there's more to Nicholas than meets the eyes. Despite his unimpressive appearance, he's faced an ogre of a father in law + tracked down Liam in a dangerous place. And it seems Liam likes the young couple. I think he might even think of Nicholas almost as a son. I think that, more than the gold, might be what drives Liam to try this rescue.

A tiny suggestion here. I think it's best to stick to "said" as a speech tag. eg in " "we can't just leave her," he protested..." we know he's protesting from the dialogue, so the word "protested" isn't needed. "said" is a simpler and more transparent word the reader won't even notice. As such, I think it's a better option, and will make for quicker dialogue.

Reading on... I liked the short argument between Nick and Liam. It was fun and really brought out their respective characteristics. Liam's sarcastic and Nick's resolute. In some ways, I think Nick might be even stronger than Liam. Ooh it was a risk calling Liam a coward, though. I'm amazed that didn't prick Liam more. Liam seems to have restraint. Rare for a man in his position.

I've another small suggestion here. I think 90% of the time a strong verb does the job better than a weaker verb-adverb pair. eg I think "Glaring..." would work better than "Staring furiously...". I'd only use adverbs if there isn't a verb that quite fits what you need to describe. Increasingly, I think that picking the best verbs is a large part of writing. ;)

Reading on... Poor Nick. Sounds like they took his wife while he was there and there was nothing he could do about it. Probably sensible he didn't resist, but it may show he's a coward.

I've a tiny suggestion here. Once you've given a name for a character, I think it's easier and clearer to always refer to them by that name. eg after a good amount of time, you mentioned Captain Magnus. It took me a moment to realise who you meant. That moment of confusion could pull the reader a little out of the story. Best to keep them engrossed in your adventure. ;)

Reading on... Looks like they're planning. I wonder what they'll come up with. But wait, who's this strange woman? Is she friend or foe? Aha seems she's a friend. Shock news: the kidnappers want the Riddle. The plot thickens. This woman's brother's the kidnapper, and he's obsessed with the Riddle. Bianca was only a pawn he took to get what he really wants.

I like that you hint of bad blood between the strange woman and her brother without explicitly explaining the history behind it. This makes my imagination race. I wonder what on Earth this man can have done to anger his sister so much.

Uh oh. the clock's ticking. They need to get in or Bianca's dead. Looks like they'll have to accept the strange woman's help. There's no other way they can get in. Now Liam's got motivation too. No pirate would ever let another take his ship without putting up a hell of a fight.

Aha they go in by grappling hook. Quiet and unseen. Neat. And what strange substance does Rowan use to blow the door open? A silent explosive. Interesting.

The scene of Bianca's kidnap's vivid and well done. I especially liked the kidnapper's odd eyes. Good to get inside her head a bit too. It seems she's no weakling. She’s filled with fire and character. I almost laughed at her reaction when Liam turned up. She seemed v unimpressed to see him, even while rescuing her. ;)

There's 1 last thing I should mention here. Your 1st chapter has uploaded twice for some reason. It repeats itself within the authonomy chapter 1. Dunno how that happened. Weird.

OK I've just seen how big this comment's getting. Sorry, I guess I got a bit carried away by your story. I'll sum up now, and then shut up. :)

I enjoyed your story a lot. I think it's filled with adventure and excitement. The characters are all well drawn and interesting, and the dialogue feels real and reads well. I want to see what happens to Nick and Bianca. And I want to learn of this mysterious plan to capture the Riddle. And why is Rowan so at odds with her brother? I think all these questions and many more are what will really draw readers into your book, and keep them reading far too late into the night. ;)

I've rated your book v highly, and hope you find an agent soon. I think there's a real market out there for your book. :)

Best of luck,

Pete x

curiousturtle wrote 795 days ago

Kasie,

I started reading your Opus and thought I would give you my cent and half:

The first thing that jumps here is the style. Is a moment by moment perception where every moment is a dangling act promising the next to have the same urgency....

..... and that you deliver.

The jewel of the narrative however is the delicious descriptions you make

"toothsome example of feminine youth"

"delicious curves'

"barbed as a porcupine"

"raked over him"

"rising like heat waves"

All delivered with gusto throughout your narrative....

.....this mind candy creates a cola-like effect in the reader...

...re freshing him time after time

....for we read not only for the plot...

...we read to re -discover language...

...or better said...

...to let language....

...rediscover us

.....and that you do

Some Minor/Minorest/Minormost points:

"obviously wasn't happy" "masterfully crafted" blended perfectly"
I would cut a bit on the emotional labeling
Why?
Because when the writer labels an emotion, the reader reads ...the label
when he uses body language to describe...the reader feels

Let me know if that helps,

Overall, wonderful

david


Ruth Hannah wrote 800 days ago

Wolf and the Riddle. - A great pirate adventure!!!
It has wonderful characters with engaging dialogue.
A great read, I will add to my WL
Ruth x

Ruth Hannah wrote 800 days ago

Wolf and the Riddle. - A great pirate adventure!!!
It has wonderful characters with engaging dialogue.
A great read, I will add to my WL
Ruth x

Pia wrote 857 days ago

Kasie -

Wolf and the Riddle - A highly enjoyable read. I met Liam, Nick and Rowan so far, all impressive and well drawn characters with peppered dialogues between them. The rich descriptions engage and there's a lovely cadence to the writing. Back her to refresh my comment from months ago and rate the book with a handful of stars :) Pia

child wrote 923 days ago

Wolf and the Riddle - The is more than a touch of 'Cap'n Jack Sparrow' in descriptions of Liam Magnus, his manner and dialogue. Pressed by friendship into a mission he would much rather not be involved in, Liam is hampered by kidnapped Bianca's young husband, Nicholas. We met the unlikely pair scoping out a fortress and pondering the possible outcome of rescue. Rowan Harrington is introduced at this point, leaving the reader in no doubt as to her courage, resourcefulness and the hint of mystery that surrounds her. The author has a swashbuckling story to tell. The characters backstories are developed nicely with some good writing that has a wonderfully lyrical feel in places.

Child - Atramentus Speaks

ccb1 wrote 927 days ago

Added Wolf and the Riddle to our watchlist. The pitch caught our attention...what does the moon have to do with it? We must read this to find the answer.
CC Brown
Dark Side

Colin Normanshaw wrote 928 days ago

This is very nicely constructed, with some excellent narrative. I love the metaphore with the cliff face, for example. You make it easy to associate with your characters, and the story has good pace. Backed. Colin

Daniel Manning wrote 978 days ago

Nobility turned boatbuilder had refused to hand the Sphinxs Riddle over, king James saw it has treason, and Rowan Harringtons brother kidnapped the daughter of a wealthy English nobleman, hoping to capture the Sphinx when it was sent to carry out the rescue. Captain Liam Magnus doesn't see the trap, so Rowan herself has to betray her own brother, but thats enough to get her passage on the ship that her Grandfather built.
Great story, a kidnapping becomes a complex issue, revealing that the gift that was once bestowed on Liam Magnus the captaincy of the Sphinx, may not be as straight forward as he first thought.
Backed with pleasure
Daniel Manning
No Compatibility.

John Warren-Anderson wrote 983 days ago

First of all 'for goodness sake' doesn't sound very much like a pirate, I'd expect something like 'by satan's blood' or the like. I had to get that off my chest. Chapters 2 & 3 (3 was as far as I read) were very good and the narative moved the story along. It was well crafted and structured, but beware of starting a sentence with a word that ends ing. It weakens the statement.
But overall I liked what I saw and I will back it. But I do feel you need to lose the prologue. I think you have a better story if you start at what is now 2. Look at what is in the prologue, decide what information is essential, and feed it gently in with the narative. I really think you will end up with a stronger book .
Best of luck.
John

fletcherkovich wrote 985 days ago

Kasie-




I know you are a good writer.
I do not mind much about grammatical errors or a miss of using punctuations like any other writers do here as they are making comments. I want to comment on the general impression of the story, your way of writing and the perfect message that you want to share to your readers because after all literature is sharing all the different colours of life. I believe you, as a writer, have got all the good elements to be called a good writer. The truth is, I haven't finished reading the entire chapters but I did manage to read chapters 1-5 and those chapters were enough to convince me that you deserve to get a good publisher one day and for sure it is going to be soon.The twists and the thrill are really sensible and clear. I believed that your book just deserves the praise and the claps it earned. I appreciate reading a high quality product of literature. Good luck to your writing career.
Take care.

FLETCH

CarolinaAl wrote 989 days ago

A well written fantasy adventure. Original and quirky characters. Snappy dialogue that evokes the era. Well imagined settings. Tense narrative. Poignant scenes. Brisk plot. Superb writing. An immensely enjoyable read. Backed.

Chris Yates wrote 990 days ago

Kasie

I read from the start to the first break in the story and I must say that you set this up well. You jump stright in describing your two main characters, Liam and Nick, and hook the reader with what could possibly be a love triangle , with the missing Bianca.

Your descriptive paragraphs work well as they are not too indepth and serve to inform the reader of what's happening and what has gone before. This works well as too many novels get caught up in trying to tell the reader everything.

I know that there will indefinetly be more to this story and the mention of Port Royal invokes a sense of Pirates and the high seas of the Carribean. Giving the story a Treasure Island/Master and Commander feel.

Backed with pleasure.

Chris Yates

K A Smith wrote 996 days ago

Wolf and the Riddle is outstanding. It is so unusual for me to find a book on here where the author outshines most of their favourite published authors, but I have to say I think this is the case here. If this gets the right sort of support from the publisher, it will be on the best-seller lists, it's that good. Well done indeed, and thank you for sharing it with us. KA.

homewriter wrote 996 days ago

Dear Kasie, What a wonderful yard with a good sprinkling of healthy humour. I absolutely loved it! You are a natural writer: good flow, pace and character development. Gordon - The Harpist of Madrid

Jan wrote 1004 days ago

Hi, sure I backed this a while ago - a remember the pirates and thought what fun :-) It romps straight into the action - no messing. Just the way I like my books! But as I am far too disorganised to keep records :-) I will back it now just in case.

Kevin Alex Baker wrote 1007 days ago

Kasie,

Oh man, I'm enjoying this. You weave this tale with an imaginative ease, and you've got some great characters to play with in this sandbox you've created. Wolf and the Riddle reads like a winner! I normally offer some kind of critique, but I've got none here.

Nice work! Backed! Looking forward to your thoughts on Head Games!

Kevin Alex Baker
Head Games

Bocri wrote 1012 days ago

14 August 2010
Wolf and The Riddle is written with a light deft touch and is pleasingly visual. Characters are introduced with gradual, minimal detail allowing (nice device) the reader to form his own completed imagery. The opening skilfully takes us into an ongoing action and the plot moves on without undue deviation. One minor reservation, and I admit this leans towards the subjective, is the occasional redundancy, such as 'privateer ship' where the sense of the sentence clearly indicates a vessel and not a person therefore 'privateer' would suffice. However, this does not detract from the efficacy of the work which has an overall believable feel of the intended time and genre. BACKED. Robert Davidson. The Tuzla Run

WJ Stephens wrote 1018 days ago

'Wolf in the Riddle' has some really solid writing and captivating pace, pleased to back this one.

djinnia wrote 1025 days ago

read all of it, and i loved it. the werewolf twist on a pirate tale is an excellent twist.

the only thing is that i could see part one as a whole book by itself as does part two. they have a great potential for an even more expansive work.

i can see this it having graphic novel potential as well.

great as it is, but can become excellent.

me

Elizabeth Wolfe wrote 1027 days ago

Dear Kasie,
I suggest you take the last 2 paragraphs off your pitch. This info could be placed on your profile, but the pitch should be dedicated to explaining your story. The rest of the pitch is quite good. It draws the reader in for more.

BACKED
Elizabeth Wolfe (MEMORIES OF GLORY)

Here is your chance to get a double backing. My friend, homewriter, and I have similar taste in writing and trust each other's judgment. Back my book and leave it on your bookshelf. Then do the same for his, "The Harpist of Madrid." Once the backings register, he will give you a return backing guaranteed. Just let him know in an email that you've backed my book as well as his. You might have to be a bit patient as we're 6 time zones apart. But you'll have two backings guaranteed on your excellent book. Of course, comments are always welcome too!

Andrew Burans wrote 1028 days ago

You have crafted a most interesting storyline and your use of short paragraphs and crisp dialogue keeps the pace of your story flowing well. You did an excellent job in building the characters of Liam and Rowan and your descriptive and imaginative writing makes your fantasy a pleasure to read. Backed.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Cariad wrote 1031 days ago

This is great, rollicking writing, carrying us along on a tide (pardon the nautical references) of action and instantly memorable and sympathetic characters. Watchlisting as my eyes are tired, will read on tomorrow.

Idea Girl Consulting wrote 1031 days ago

backed :)

Sly80 wrote 1035 days ago

'There's no bit of warrior in yer ink-filled veins', vibrant, rich language weaves this fantasy which has the spicy flavours of Pirates of the Caribbean mixed with a mysterious supernatural element. There's a nice touch of humour too, 'Well, then, one can do it as easy as two'. Liam, the 'tatter-souled pirate', is misunderstood, if not underestimated, by lanky Nick, and while they are distracted, a new character turns up with some interesting information... Fantastic action during the escape scene, 'He'd left the gold!', and then the bullet wound ... ouch. Even injured, Rowan can stand up for herself, and we're set for an epic adventure ... backed.

Possible nits: consider the following rewording to keep the point of view firmly with Liam in this section, 'but Nick appeared oblivious to it all, his mind no doubt lost to...'. To avoid confusion here, 'He [Liam] aimed a frown'. 'Nick spat through clenched teeth', sounds slightly contradictory ... 'hissed' might be better. There is perhaps a little too much description of Liam and Nick, some of it feeling like a repeat - perhaps trim slightly.

Despinas1 wrote 1036 days ago

Brilliant. Backed
Helen
The Last Dream

Jan wrote 1037 days ago

Pirates. What's not to like.

Craig Ellis wrote 1041 days ago

A great tale of salty sea dogs. Your descriptive powers are excellent, as is the plot. Good dialogue, and some phrases thrown in that made me smile and kept the story moving. "Pampered upper arms",and "ink-filled veins" to name a few. Loved it. Backed with pleasure!

Craig Ellis
The Sun and the Saber

greeneyes1660 wrote 1044 days ago

Kasie, I stayed up til 4:30 am to read this amazing novel. What unbelievable surprises...So much more then gold and trinkets...This is the true treasure. Your Mc's are so well developed as is your storyline...so many unexpected twists.

This is a voyage that takes us on an imaginative, intense, intrigueing, romantic, magical journey. Your pace is perfect, your tension building is superb and this just has something for everyone.

I was truly swept away..I loved all your cast of characters, each were endearing and I found myself equally attached and interested in their storylines. You should be very proud of yourself this is a WINNER...Backed without a doubt Patricia aka Columbia Layers of the Heart P.S Great pitch thank you for not giving away to much, and letting us find the surprise in the middle on our own

Mr. Nom de Plume wrote 1046 days ago

The setting and locale hooked me instantly, I think my reaction was due to reading almost everything in the Hornblower series when I was much younger. This work is a gem of writing craftmanship. Backed and good luck with you work and passion for being an author. Chuck (Paperboy Adventures---Literary Agent Blues---Uboat Officer)

SusieGulick wrote 1074 days ago

You are like totally fantastic, Kasie! :) How can I ever thank you for backing my 2 memoir books? :)
God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)
p.s. I saw that you have a 2nd book, so will back it. :)

SusieGulick wrote 1078 days ago

Dear Kasie, I got so excited when I saw that you had backed, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not." :) Thanks so very much. :) Since I have already "backed" your book, I will put your book on my "watchlist." Could you please take a moment to "back" my completed unedited memoir version? "Tell Me True Love Stories," which at the end tells of my illness now & 6th abusive marriage. I'd be ever so grateful. :) Thank you. :) Love, Susie :)
authonomy quotes: "Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs.
When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved...authonomy

Rakhi wrote 1084 days ago

This story is one great, fun adventure. You have managed to create two very good characters and the reader is keen to know what happens between them. Your writing is filled with humor and wit and the end result is pure entertainment.
Backed earlier and glad to have read more to comment.
Rakhi (Sir William...)

Mooderino wrote 1086 days ago

It reads very well, you give the characters srrong, distinct personalities and the general vibe is full of adventure. i think it has a lot going for it but to be honest this has too many similarities to another Pirate adventure. A cocky pirate, an earnest young man, a feisty young woman, a ship that's desired by various parties, a possible love triangle in the offing. While the story I'm sure goes off in a completely different direction theses similarities to PotC are very striking in the first couple of chapters.

Even though the writing is very good I found it very hard to separate this from that other story and I feel you need to do that if you want to get this story read. Sorry, but I couldn't get past those similarities, to the point their voices started in my head.

This is just my opinion of course but I try to be honest as I would want somedone else to be with me, i hope you take it in the spirit it is meant.

regards
mood

PATRICK BARRETT wrote 1088 days ago

I have always been fond of pirate adventures, so your book certainly interested me. Your characters are strong and the descriptions good. This is perfectly paced and is a real page turner. Wishing you every success - Paula (Cuthbert: how mean is my valley?)

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