Book Jacket

 

rank 27
word count 96671
date submitted 26.02.2010
date updated 28.02.2013
genres: Fiction, Literary Fiction, Popular ...
classification: moderate
complete

The Existence Game

J.S. Adams

Told with warmth, insight, and humor, The Existence Game portrays the life of Alex, a young woman suffering from and overcoming Borderline Personality Disorder.

 

THIS IS NOT A MEMOIR, IT IS FICTION!

“...I investigated every place in my bedroom that a murderer might hide -- even, I'm not kidding, my desk drawers... then got into my closet, pulling shoes, comic books and other stuff over me, so the murderers wouldn't see me. They'd figure I was a pile of junk. But even then, the pile of junk couldn't get to sleep. I hallucinated the sound of footsteps, breathing, even threatening whispers. Roasting under the blankets, I read by flashlight until I couldn't keep my eyes open.”

Alex Moser, a self-declared nutcase, is at the end of her rope. Finding little meaning in a life governed by innumerable phobias, she finally gives suicide a shot, but… “I couldn’t even get that right!” she moans upon awakening in the hospital. The Existence Game chronicles two months in Alex’s life, detailing her path from suicide attempt to long-awaited healing. Peopled with complex, intriguing characters and situations, this is an altogether inspirational and uplifting story.

 
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borderline personality disorder, child abuse, munchausen by proxy, overcoming mental illness, patient therapist relationships, psychiatric hospital, p...

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...I’ve fallen, weak, but will not die

My tears will be my battle cry;

Though illness threatens to devour,

This will not be my final hour.

I’ll struggle on through fear and shame

And soar, a phoenix from the flame;

I’ve laughter, friendship, art to give,

There is a love-filled life to live.

Excerpt from the poem PHOENIX by Carmen Paddock

 

INTRODUCTION

 

This is about two months that took place shortly before my thirtieth birthday. No other time in my life even remotely compares with this tiny fistful of weeks beginning in February of 1989. Among other things, George Bush had just been sworn into office as our forty-first president, and was soon to launch Operation Just Cause – the largest U.S. military invasion since Vietnam – in order to oust former U.S. ally, General Manuel Noriega, from Panama. Driving Miss Daisy would win an Oscar for Best Motion Picture, with Jessica Tandy taking Best Actress in the same movie, and, there were probably some other incidents of note…

In my world, however, you’d think my home base was on Mars. I had no idea who Jessica Tandy was, hadn’t heard of Driving Miss Daisy, was clueless about The Oscars, and knew nothing of Panama, except that I had a vague suspicion we’d dug a canal there because I’d recently seen the movie Arsenic and Old Lace. And although I knew George Bush had just been inaugurated (because the inauguration forced me to take a different route to The Pub that day), I wasn’t really sure of who had come along for the ride as Vice President of the United States. And I lived in D.C. for Pete’s sake.          – Alex Moser, Spring, 1999

 

CHAPTER ONE   –   THE SET UP

“When I was little, Pop called me ‘Sponge Baby.’ He said I soaked up everything I came in contact with, good or bad. I guess that’s how kids are – they absorb everything, just suck it all in. People should be more careful about what they do around kids.”

Eileen O’Keefe, Bartender and Budding Philosopher

 

I am Alexis Moser. I like the name “Alexis,” but I cringe when I hear it. I feel like I’m in trouble. So I go by Alex. The events of the day before I landed in the hospital don’t explain everything, but they are what led me to Jonathan Frank. Without him, I’d be dead, so it seems like a good place to begin. Events don’t occur in a vacuum, though. To understand why someone would decide to end her life often requires some background, so please bear with me as I introduce you to my world.

The Beatles’ song, Tomorrow Never Knows, refers to existence as a game, and implies that it is a game we play over and over again. I always liked that perspective. Reincarnation as a learning vehicle made sense to me. One lifetime didn’t seem long enough to learn everything – not for me, anyway – so I thought we probably just kept coming back until we got it all right. My Definition of “right” included honesty and fairness in one’s dealings, actively caring for the poor among us, avoiding judgment, excess, and greed, and certainly not murdering one another.

After we finally got through the existence game, we began something new. I had no idea of what that might be, but I felt certain that it was a good something, since striving to be a good person seemed to be what most people held as one of the highest ideals – even when they fell short of the mark themselves. I was also pretty sure the existence game didn’t allow for cowardly departures; if we cut our mission short, we might have to come back for the same lessons.

So I was more than a little hesitant to check out, although I wasn’t particularly afraid of dying. I had known a good deal of happiness in my life, but since pain and fear trumped happiness by about ten to one, I often felt somewhat inclined to end my existence. What worried me was that all of the pain I’d already lived through was supposed to teach me something. If I bailed out early I’d probably have to come back and repeat all of that misery. I often wished I could just figure out what I was supposed to learn, and learn it, so I could leave. No revelations ever came to me, though, and I was quite sure I did not want to come back for the same lessons.

In spite of my concerns, however, on Tuesday, February 4th, 1989, I felt that I could no longer play the current existence game; all I wanted was for the abundant, virtually ceaseless pain and fear that comprised my life to finally be over.

The night before, Nick Valenzano, my landlord and neighbor, had told me that neither the January nor the February rent had been paid, and he needed the January rent by the end of the week. I had given my boyfriend, Gunner, (yes, “Gunner”) my half of the rent, and didn’t know he hadn’t paid Nick. I felt furious with Gunner and frightened by the possibility of eviction. To add insult to injury, he hadn’t come home, and I fumed all night about both the rent and about a fact I’d been trying to pretend didn’t exist: Gunner was certainly cheating on me.

On Tuesday morning, with still no sign of The Gun, I was so enraged that I collected all of his possessions and, stuffing them into garbage bags, I hurled them over the landing of our second-story apartment. I didn’t think of myself as a vengeful person, but I admit I felt some satisfaction when I tossed Gunner’s leftover pizza into the same bag as his favorite suit.

Dating Gunner was one of my bigger mistakes. I should have been suspicious of a grown man who referred to himself as “The Gun,” but I felt like I was somebody because the great Gunner Rhodes was my boyfriend. I wasn’t anxious to let that presumed prestige go. He had seemed so perfect. Frankly, I was as surprised as my family to find myself going out with such a successful guy. But I’d always hoped that maybe I was better than my family believed. Better than I believed. I imagined that Gunner saw something good in me that I’d somehow missed.

He was a well-known sports reporter on one of the local TV news programs and my family thought he was wonderful. They were all baffled about why he would date me, although none of them actually said anything – except Grandma, who asked, “What’s he doing going out with you?” Everyone feigned surprise at her question, but they had obviously been wondering, too.

When Gunner finally arrived and saw his stuff all over the driveway (a few of the plastic bags hadn’t survived their trip) he stormed into our apartment and started getting rough, but I was so angry I didn’t care. Fortunately, Nick had been watching for Gunner’s return, and shortly after he arrived, Nick charged into our living room and ordered him to leave. I thought no one knew that Gunner knocked me around, but Nick obviously did and although I felt relieved to be rescued, I also felt ashamed to be living with a man like Gunner.

Nick wasn’t a large man, and towering over him, Gunner just sneered, but Nick wasn’t even remotely intimidated. He treated Gunner like a cranky toddler, calmly informing him that the police were on the way. A moment later, when the unmistakable sound of sirens could be heard, Gunner had a change of heart. Cursing us both, he headed downstairs, shoved his bags into the car, and roared off.

Nick suggested that I find a woman to rent the second bedroom. I was glad he wanted me to stay, even though I didn’t know how I could afford it, being two months in arrears on the rent already. But I loved the wood-frame house, and the second-floor apartment was beautiful. It would be good to find a way to stay. Nick was a great landlord and I enjoyed talking with him. Unfortunately, although I was still wound up, I knew I’d never make it through work that evening. So, reluctantly, after thanking him profusely, I told Nick I had to get some sleep.

But I couldn’t sleep, and here’s where the real admissions begin. An abusive boyfriend was just the tip of the iceberg. I couldn’t sleep because I was afraid to be by myself. I always had been. I mean, I’m not anymore, but this is after a lot of therapy. Back then, when I was alone, I couldn’t stop imagining someone was either hiding in my house, or was about to break into my house, and then rape and murder me. That fear took such control of my thoughts that I couldn’t sleep. During the day, if I wasn’t trying to sleep, I usually managed to hold in the fear enough to uneasily accomplish a minimum number of tasks, provided I was wary. But trying to fall asleep was nearly impossible.

After dark, whether I was ready for bed or not, I became utterly terrified of being alone, and no amount of logical reassurances made one bit of difference. I stayed awake and vigilant until exhaustion finally knocked me out – hours after I should have fallen asleep. I fashioned my life to accommodate this all-encompassing terror, and either lived with a boyfriend, or, more frequently, in a group house. As long as I was engaged with others, my fears took a back seat, and it wasn’t until bedtime that I ran into difficulties. At bedtime, though, it was just as bad as when I was a kid.

Between the ages of five and twelve I’d slept with my sister, Shelby. I was less afraid and fell asleep more readily. Although I was plagued by nightmares, it was better than when I turned twelve and Mom made me start sleeping in my own room. Every night was the same. I reluctantly left my family members, and, terrified, but without options, I began my nightly investigation of every place in my bedroom where a murderer might be hiding – even, I am not kidding, inside my desk drawers.

I then donned the following: two pairs of underpants, tights, leotard, tank top, long-sleeved tee-shirt, shorts, sweatpants, sweatshirt, and socks. It was an utterly miserable outfit but I felt safer, as if I were wearing armor. Then, instead of getting into my bed, I got into my closet, pulling shoes, comic books, blankets and other stuff over me, so that when the murderers came in, they wouldn’t see me. They’d figure I was just a pile of junk. But even then, the pile of junk couldn’t get to sleep. I was constantly hallucinating the sound of footsteps, breathing, even threatening whispers that were not quite discernible, but rich with evil intent. Roasting under the blankets, I read by flashlight until I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer.

This made for difficult times in school, where I slept more often than not. I always managed to move to the next grade, but I didn’t learn very much and was regularly humiliated when the teacher called on me. Being in school was a nightmare. With the exception of my very small handful of friends, none of whom were in my classes, being around other children was excruciating. I felt so painfully awkward, and was so frequently on the verge of tears when anyone talked to me, that I became an automatic target for the cruelest children in school.

At home, my insane mother was continually shifting between Good Mommy, Evil Mommy, and Absentee Mommy. Trying to balance my responses to the Mommy of the Moment was impossible. She might be going along in a pleasant, “I’m so happy to be your Mom” sort of a way, and then something inexplicable occurred, and PRESTO! She turned into Evil Mommy and sought me out as her target of choice. There were no clues as to what brought about the change, and like my father and sister, I learned to stay away from her as much as possible – quite a challenge since I had a powerfully conflicting desire to win her good opinion, which required that I remain in her sphere of awareness. The only respite I had was to bury myself in a book. I grew up inside of books, and usually read a couple of dozen each week. The local librarians loved me and always got up to hold the door for me as I marched in, or out, with borrowed books loaded from as far down as I could reach to just under my chin.

Fortunately, there were some exceptions to all of the miserable times. From the age of three on, I had a wonderful friend, Jane Rosenberg. Until we were seven, when I moved, we were inseparable and had many fantastic adventures – hunting butterflies, crayfish, and minnows, swimming in the creek, building a go-cart (we forgot about brakes), climbing trees, racing around on our bikes, plastered to her heated dining room floor on Sunday winter mornings, reading The Washington Post comics, (Peanuts and Ripley’s Believe It or Not were our favorites).

After my family moved, I was only able to see Jane about once a month, but I became close friends with the boy across the street, Chris Worth. He and I picked up where Jane and I had left off, and spent as much time as possible outdoors – building forts, attempting to reach China with our little shovels, turning purple picking mulberries, pretending to be space men, or whatever struck our fancy. When bad weather forced us inside, we meticulously built and painted plastic monsters from an endless supply of models Chris kept on hand. My favorite, and I still have it, was The Creature from the Black Lagoon. Chris was very bright and funny, always doing crazy stuff like sending away for samples of things, and following his name with “MD.” As a result, at the age of nine, he was receiving all sorts of medical samples, including thousands of tongue depressors and gauze squares, which were great for our numerous craft projects.

Chris moved when I was eleven, and although at first we spoke frequently on the phone, he made new friends and our conversations dwindled down to a couple of calls a year. When Chris was fifteen, he called me one day, excitedly telling me he had a girlfriend, and then again, several months later, to tell me he had leukemia. I didn’t know what that was. I visited him in Georgetown Hospital, and was brokenhearted to see my beloved friend so emaciated, pale, and hairless. Chris died shortly after his sixteenth birthday, and my world seemed to nearly die with him. When my father passed away soon after, I felt my life had ended. From that point on I was just going through the motions.

Before that horrible time I did have a reprieve each summer from the madness at home. Beginning in the summer of my eighth year, I was able to attend a wonderful overnight camp in West Virginia. Although I was still terrified when I was alone, I was rarely by myself, sharing a cabin with seven other girls. Inexplicably, I was not considered weird and in fact was fairly popular. The rigorous activities of the days left me utterly exhausted, and I slept well at night. I excelled in most sports and made friends easily. No one ever tried to make me feel awful about myself. I didn’t feel stupid or ugly, and there were even kids who looked up to me – mainly because I was good in sports, but also, to my surprise, because my personality actually seemed okay. I was funny, sensitive, sharp, and bold – all things I could hardly express at home.

It felt indescribably wonderful to be liked and to be a part of a group. Camp was heaven on earth. At home, apart from my friendships with Jane and Chris, the endless hours of school were sheer torture, nights were utterly terrifying, and the ongoing tension between my mother and me was nearly unbearable. Camp was so different – and I was so different – that I went by another name: “Fern,” a character from one of my favorite books. I never had to hear “Alexis” and I felt like a new, whole person.

The best thing about my childhood was the wonderful relationship I had with my father. We sometimes did yard work together, and every Sunday he took Shelby and me out for breakfast – without Mom. She viewed this as her time off, but the three of us viewed it as our time off – from all of her craziness and anger. Shelby and I always had fun with Dad on Sunday mornings. Between Mommy-less time with my father, and the many weeks I spent each summer at camp, I was able to experience what life was supposed to feel like.

Unfortunately, the good times didn’t outweigh the bad – as I grew older and was expected to shoulder greater responsibilities, I became more mentally ill, developing increasingly strange ways of handling the growing number of situations that I didn’t know how to cope with. I couldn’t admit to my problems, so I had to just allow people to think I was very stupid and/or unbelievably strange, which was very painful. Things might have been different, at least in school, had I been able to sleep at night, but while others slept through their nights, I was vigilantly surviving through mine.

When I was eighteen, and Mom kicked me out of the house, I moved in with a new boyfriend, Dorian Gallon – the first “love of my life.” Dorian turned out to be even more of a mess than I was, although I was ill-equipped to recognize this at the time. I had no other options, anyway. Mom had never allowed me to work, so I had no job and no money, and although Dad left money for our college tuition, Mom had informed me that it would be like flushing money down the toilet to pay for me to attend college. There was simply nowhere else for me to go – unless I wanted to try my hand at living on the streets.

What had not been apparent to me until I moved into his apartment was that Dorian was actually a terribly cruel man. The damage he did to my self-esteem took years to undo. There’s no point in getting into that relationship; suffice to say Dorian’s particular brand of sadism was designed to destroy women and he was excellent at it. The positive experiences I had from my relationships with Dad, Jane, Chris, and my camp friends, were completely undone by him. When I finally got away from him, every tenuous shred of confidence was gone, and a life that was already more than difficult became nearly impossible and utterly joyless.

I was so anxious to leave Dorian that I didn’t realize I was incapable of living on my own. In my new apartment I nailed all the windows shut, making the summer months unbearable, especially since I had to go back to wearing my bizarre nighttime armor. Each time I came home, I checked every conceivable hiding place, including inside the oven, and, after locking the four extra dead bolts, I pushed my ultra-heavy couch in front of the door. I couldn’t shower comfortably, convinced that in spite of my efforts, someone would break in, and I vigilantly kept my eyes glued to the locked bathroom door, often leaving shampoo in my hair as I anxiously dried and dressed as quickly as possible. The laundry room in the basement of the building terrified me, so I washed all of my clothing in the bathtub, hanging it on the furniture to dry, and then had to spend hours ironing stuff that would have come out of the dryer wrinkle-free had I been able to muster the courage to brave the basement. But with its winding hallways and numerous alcoves, there was no way that I would venture into that dangerous labyrinth.

As a result of my inability to sleep at night, I gave up day jobs and surrendered my life to nighttime waitressing and bartending. Although the choice meant that I’d never be able to have any of the jobs I’d dreamed of, at least I didn’t have to try to go to sleep until dawn, and fewer people were aware of just how dysfunctional I really was. To compound the problems, I quickly discovered alcohol, which didn’t help anything, although it certainly seemed to at the time. In high school I had smoked pot to get away from how awful I felt, but after high school, pot was harder to come by. Working in bars enabled me to drink regularly, which numbed my pain and made it easier to tolerate my intolerable existence. With all of the obstacles, there was never any reason to believe that I would ever accomplish anything meaningful, and I sank into a numb existence that, from the outside, appeared fairly comfortable and happy, but which, when the alcohol was removed, revealed its self to be an insidious form of hell.

Eventually I found a room in a group house which made many aspects of my life easier, but the Nazi nightmares that had plagued my precious sleep since early childhood were still a big problem. Fortunately, in group houses, when I awoke frozen with fear I could calm myself more readily, knowing that others were around. When a nightmare was particularly difficult to shake off, I tiptoed to each housemate’s bedroom door, where I stood silently, waiting to hear a sign that they were still alive. After moments of stillness, even the softest breathing became evident and I could return to my room and read myself back to sleep.

After that first apartment fiasco I had always lived in group houses until I met Gunner. And now here I was, alone, because I’d kicked him out. How stupid to prefer being knocked around to being alone. And yet I had preferred it because being hit occasionally was better than feeling too frightened to sleep. I was terrified of not getting enough sleep because the more exhausted I became, the closer I danced toward making that final decision to just end everything – a decision I didn’t really wish to make.

As soon as Nick left I brought my alarm clock, pillow, and blanket into the living room and burrowed into the couch. It made no difference that I hadn’t had any sleep, though. My mind was racing and each sound grew into something deeply sinister. After a sleepless and fearful hour, I decided a shot of scotch with some codeine would help me relax. The next thing I knew, the alarm was blaring and as I stared at the time, I couldn’t believe I’d slept for forty-five minutes through that racket. And, once again, I was late for work.

Rusty’s was a pretty laid back restaurant, and being tardy hadn’t seemed to matter very much. On this particular occasion, though, my manager had a new take on my apparently casual attitude toward punctuality. He said that anyone who lived only two blocks away ought to be able to get to work on time. When he fired me, I was furious, but in retrospect, how could I blame him? I was frequently late and he’d put up with me for nearly a year. Burning with shame, fear, and anger, I wandered down Wisconsin Avenue, not really sure of where I was heading. I rifled through my mental rolodex, searching for anyone who might be able to lend money to me.

Unfortunately, I’d borrowed money from just about everyone I knew who had any, and I really didn’t feel I could ask for more – even from the few people I’d already paid back. As I walked, I began formulating a plan. Mom had never been willing to help me, but I thought she might loan me the $400 I needed for the rent if I could guarantee her that I’d pay her back within a month. It’s taken me a long time to learn that this was totally delusional thinking – on two counts. The first was that I almost never seemed able to earn enough to pay loans back, and the second was that Mom wouldn’t have thrown me a rope if she had had one in her hands and I was drowning.

My regular stomping grounds included a bar – a dive, really – called “The Pub.” It was about four miles from my house, and many of my friends were either employees or ex-employees. Lots of them had tee-shirts proclaiming, “I Finally Came to My Senses and Stopped Working at the Pub!” Of course, they still drank there because it was the greatest bar in D.C. It was an Irish bar, not far from Capitol Hill, and the place was a total hoot. Above the front door, Kieran, the owner, had painted, “Thirsty? Hungry? Confused? Come On In!” and installed a rusty mechanical winking eye over the door that periodically got stuck, making an awful grinding noise.

The Pub was not a meat market, like most of the downtown bars, or an upscale yuppie hangout like the other two pubs on the block. It was a neighborhood bar with many regular customers of all ages and from all walks of life. Congressional reps rubbed elbows with sales clerks, and nurses and med students came in for shooters on their Friday night “liver rounds.” But the core contingency of regulars was formed by those who were simply drifting through life, like me, and to us, The Pub was Home. There were a few raging alcoholics among us, but the vast majority were there for the familial camaraderie. Although there were some sad cases, The Pub was filled with many vibrant, talented people, and I felt more alive there than anywhere else.

I’d never applied for a job with Kieran because I didn’t want to risk ruining my favorite watering hole, but I began to consider the possibility. I could make decent money if I worked the bar with my good friend, Eileen O’Keefe. And if it became unbearable I could presumably come to my senses, too, and look for work elsewhere. Walking toward The Pub, I gradually convinced myself that a job opening did in fact exist, and that I wouldn’t have any trouble getting hired. I was attractive and engaging, and landing restaurant jobs had never been difficult (keeping them, of course, was another story). Buoyed by my plans for immediate gainful employment, and spotting a pay phone, I gathered my courage and dialed Mom’s number.

“Hello?” Ugh. I could not suppress a shudder when I heard that voice.

“Hi, Mom,” I managed a casual tone. “It’s me.”

“Alexis?” Hearing her say my name always made me want to crawl into a hole. “To what do I owe the pleasure of this call? Is that traffic I hear? Where are you? Are you in some sort of trouble?”

This response did not bode well, and I should have changed gears immediately. When she responded to my “It’s me” with “Hello, me” she was in Good Mommy mode, and though she wasn’t really a positive force in my life, at least at that moment she seemed to think we were the best of pals, and I could pretend right along with her. Ignoring my “It’s me” and jumping right into “Alexis?” as if she wasn’t sure she was speaking to her own daughter, should have told me to high tail it out of that situation. Granted I’d been adopted, but she’d had me since I was just a few days old. She ought to have known my voice after twenty-nine years. The fact that she wasn’t sure was enough to let me know I should back off. But I was both desperate and dumb. And, I was so comfortable with the discomfort she engendered in me that I hardly recognized it as a warning signal.

“I’m calling from a pay phone. I’m on my way to a new job.” I didn’t like lying to her; it was a self-preservation tactic. She used the truth to tear me to shreds.

“A new job? What was wrong with the old one? You change jobs more than anyone I know. You weren’t fired again, were you?” She was right but it was still really rich, coming from a woman who’d never been able to hold a volunteer position, much less a job, for more than six months in her entire life.

“No, Mom, I wasn’t fired. I can make more money at The Pub. I’m starting there tonight, and I’ll be bartending instead of waiting tables.”

“Bartending? When are you going to get a real job, Alexis?”

“Bartending is a real job, Mom. Listen, I’m calling because Gunner moved out and he owes me several months’ rent. I don’t think he’s going to pay me back, which is why I got a better job.”

“What did you do to make Gunner move out, Alexis?”

“Nothing, Mom, I told him to leave. He wasn’t as nice as he seemed.”

“Oh?” It was obvious that she thought my intrinsic worthlessness had finally become apparent to the great Gunner Rhodes, and he’d jumped ship.

“It’s a long story, Mom, but what I wanted to know was if you might be able to lend me $400 until the end of the month. Gunner didn’t pay his share of the rent, and –”

“Alexis! Stop! This makes me very uncomfortable. You turned eighteen years ago; I would not be doing you any favors if I bailed you out. I’m sorry you’re having problems but you’re an adult, you’ll have to solve them yourself.” And she slammed the receiver down.

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BeeJoy wrote 5 days ago

This was a hard read for me only because I struggled with mental illness. I can relate to some of this. Like my book...I talk about mental illness as well. I will say that this was well writen. Very compelling and addicting. High stars from me!

Edward Gardner wrote 5 days ago

What a well-told and agonizing first chapter you've crafted. Somehow you've presented a narrator who dumps a staggering weight of grief on us without sounding like she's feeling sorry for herself. The believable worthlessness she expresses, and the anguished experiences contributing to and arising from it, comes off as something we can probably all relate to in varying degrees. There's a realism to the account so far, helped by your use of quotations from the characters themselves to introduce the chapters. In conjunction with your opening quotation from Phoenix, these quotes give me the impression of an informal 'school' or forum, a kind of gathering of friends committed to surviving in the most graceful way they can.

Stylistically, I'd offer as a suggestion that you break your chapters about in half - I think as shorter episodes they would help propel the reader through Alexis's pain. On the other hand, asking the reader to take in the chapters in one go definitely leaves us FEELING some of that emotional weight. But I'd also shorten some of your paragraphs, which would also move the reader forward easier. For an example, in Chapter 2 I'd make 'I could always count on Eileen' the start of the second paragraph.

Typos:
'...revealed its self to be an insidious form of hell.'

Anyway, this is a powerful, and I think ultimately hopeful, story. Highest stars from me and good luck with it.
Edward
The Black Dionysia

Andrew Esposito wrote 45 days ago

The Existing Game has a strong compelling narrative as the reader is tugged along by Alex and her harrowing life. I really like the in depth analysis of the torturous conditions, both real and imagined by Alex, that leads her on a path of attempted suicide. Gunner is a good, but brief character and the family's thoughts of him being too good for Alex is a good insight into the root of some of her insecurities. Alex's relationship with her mother is distressing and the characterisation contributes well to Alex's trauma.

I like how early on, the reader is aware of the suicide attempt. It made me want to read on and learn what could bring Alex to the decision. I soon found myself cloaked in Alex's lucid, endearing narration of her troubles and doubts. Little nuggets of Pop Culture was also a good hook - I liked the explanation of the Beatles song as it set the scene immediately for Alex's actions and thought process.

Judy, The Existence Game is very well crafted. I wanted to endure Alex's sad journey with a pang of hope - signalling to me that the characterisation was rising above the unsavoury topic. I've rated The Existence Game very highly and wish you much success. Best regards, Andrew Esposito / Killing Paradise

Sheena Macleod wrote 61 days ago

Judy, I had the "existence game" on wl to read. The short and long pitch really grabbed my interest.
Chapter 1.
You give so much information about Alex in the first chapter without any sense that it is pushed- it just builds up her issues so well and flows from the page. This is a complex area, yet you present it so effortlessly. You do know the area well. How you manage to include the family, boyfriend and friend dynamics as well is nothing short of a miracle. Complex, interesting and insightful..
Alex's sense of Identity is bound up in her relationships with others.She has a strong identity whilst being with "The Gun" - she prefers this abusive relationship-to being alone
Anxiety state - grief from the double loss of losing her friend and moving away.-
Obsessive thoughts and ritualistic behaviour0- to prevent bad things happening .Her self esteem in tatters..
EEk, mum, even good mode mum is waful. Amazingly portrayed.

I love Alex Moser's quote's particularly the one at the beginning of chapter two,
Gee, poor Alex. Self harminga and a suicide attempt
I liked the way you used the Grim Reaper -GR- to describe her inner thoughts.

So much, and so cleverly constructed.
I will read more. High starred
Sheena
The Popish Plot

PowerWriter wrote 78 days ago

I've only read the first chapter so far. I'm very impressed with your writing. It's refreshing to see an arguably perfect, active first scene. The conflict and failure resonates and holds. Your voice stands out as unique and matches the prose. Your sentences are mixed nicely and appropriately. I felt no boredom and no hyperbole.

I have a minor criticism: you overuse exclamation marks -- you have at least one *grin* -- and you use capitalization to emphasize -- PRESTO! Such techniques are gimmicky, lazy, amateur, and belittling to the reader. This is a novel. Use words to build and convey emphasis, not punctuation and styling. If we don't get it, you haven't done your job.

My first impression is this will be published, but it's a long, arduous process.

I will revisit this story.

Michelle Richardson wrote 80 days ago

I just read two chapters of The Exsistence Game - it is written in a compelling voice and the
Observational style works well to develop the story and pull the reader in. Placed on my Wl and highly stared .

Well done x
Michelle Richardson - 43 primrose Avenue

Lara wrote 81 days ago

I was impressed by the careful attention to detail. The chapter after her suicide attempt. 4 I think, was particularly realistic, the fluctuating attitude to clothing etc. I am not too sure I appreciate the headings. They take away from the ongoing drama imho.
Backed. A worthy book.
Rosalind
A RELATIVE INVASION

MC Storm wrote 81 days ago

I've read two chapters and really,really enjoyed it. I can feel Alex pain from the time she's young right up the part she throws Gunner out.I snickered when Alex threw his clothes over the balcony and the garbage bag didn't quite make it. You write the sdtory very well, just enough suspense to make me want to read more.
Well Done!
MC
Exposed

Roto wrote 82 days ago

Judy, I just wanted to congratulate you on an amazing and compelling story.

I have just finished the second chapter and it is the first book I intend to read in full. I am going to mark it as one to watch.

I have to admit I cried at the end of the second chapter, so tragic and moving was the scene. It is not an easy story to write,but you do it beautifully, capturing the heartbreaking inner world of the damaged.

Well done,such an excellent job!

Elisa
Keep Running.

Edentity wrote 83 days ago

The Existence Game. After your incredible feedback on my book, I really hoped I could be helpful with yours, but I'm not sure that will happen. I'm no critic, can only say how I find it as a reader.

Pitch: I dunno, I don't think you need the 'told with...etc' - I'd like to see this more brazen, more upfront, taking no prisoners, making no apologies. It's a hard-hitting tale, and that doesn't come across from the pitches. I confess I have seen it before and skated past, not thinking it was my kind of read. Also not convinced by the cover either - but hey, that's small beans on here.

I make notes as I go along, jotting down stray thoughts - these are what I have on my pad.
Chap 1: Love your voice - you have a light touch, easy-listening writing, yet you deal with deep questions. I love the gentle self-deprecating humour of your MC. She's very likeable. Very damaged, for sure, but very likeable. We're gunning for her from the off - or, at least, I am.
There is a lot of back story here...but your writing is so easy on the ear that it's not bothering me and I'm drawn into the story.
She read around 24 books a week? That pulled me up short. I read incessantly as a child but never managed that many.
LOL to Chris - the 9 year old MD.

Chap 2 - Boy, these are REAL people. No wonder people thought this was autobiography. I have never come across such detail in writing.
The GR as a doting old lady is spine tingling. Really chilling.
I thought an afghan was a hippy coat from the 60s/70s - now I'll have to google it. :)

Chap 3 - Hmm. Still one helluva lot of reported action. I'm beginning to feel I need to see more of what's happening rather than be told about it. I'm needing more dialogue, more immediacy.

Chap 4 - NOW you're talking! It comes really alive in this chapter - all the element fuse beautifully - description, action, dialogue, interior thought. Fantastic. I get the no belts and laces - my mother had psychotic episodes and was on suicide watch several times.

Chap 5 - smiling at the prism. Now I want a prism. :)

Chap 6 - I like Todd's projection. But you know, I'm feeling distanced again. And then, suddenly, wham! We're out of Psych and in The Pub and I'm feeling a sense of let down because I wanted to hear more about how she and Dr Frank worked together at Psych.

You say it in this chapter: "Enough musing - tangents and rants sometimes look to me like the main road" and I think that may be my main stumbling block with this, Judy. I LOVE your writing and I love this story. The world you build and its characters are pitch perfect - but I felt as a reader I needed the information rearranged somehow. It's always a danger, as a writer-reader, to suggest to someone how to write their book, how YOU would write it...and I try not to...but I'm sitting on my hands. I think I'd have maybe kept with a more linear narrative (starting from just before the suicide attempt) and then maybe fed in the back story in nuggets of remembrance, scattering them through the book (so the reader gradually picks up exactly why she has come to this point). There, I said I wouldn't do it and I have... but hey, it's just my thought and, as I said, I ain't no critic.

I'll back this happily because I figure it has MASSIVE potential. And you are a pretty awesome writer.

Janet/Helen wrote 85 days ago

The Existence Game. Chapters 1 to 3.

Brilliant, powerful, gripping. Will be back to read more. In the meantime, 6 stars, onto watchlist and will back in the very near future. Janet

Janet/Helen
The Stranger In My Life

Bea Sinclair wrote 88 days ago

Beautifully written and very original this book is ready for publication. High stars and backed. Yours Bea

Keith Gilbey wrote 89 days ago

On my w/l to finish.

keith

Jaclyn Aurore wrote 89 days ago

The Existence Game - return read

After reading your book, i understand now the conversations we've since had... My book is intentionally unrealistic and should probably be tagged as "fantasy" though there isn't any paranormal or mythical being so i don't want to give people that impression...
your book on the other hand - is everything real.

my useless notes that i made throughout:
- ironic that the MC fears being alone at night lest someone break in and abuse her... yet she found comfort in an abusive boyfriend... ironic, but realistic. that fear of being alone makes us do stupid things, being with someone, no matter how mean, we justify it by saying "well at least i'm not alone/single" etc or "at least i can prepare for the worst" - the fear of the unknown is what makes us do stupid things.

how the family blames Alexis for Gunner's departure - knowing a bit of your history (even though it's not a memoir) i understand this all too well... and can relate and have friends who can relate. it's sad...

the suicide scene was well written and her reasons for doing so - established... it wasn't just 'oh my life sucks, death would be better' - there was so much more to it

by the end of the first three chapters (one autho chapter), i'm anxious to see how Alex will cope in Psych, her sessions, and what she'll learn. I assume that's where the story is going... unfortunately that part isn't posted!

the next two chapters are more like a glossary and dictionary discussion of Bipolar Vs the character... it's well written, but i want back in the story damnit!

do you plan to post more? please let me know

Jaclyn x
My Life Without Me

William Holt wrote 98 days ago

This is a highly emotional story, clearly based on the sort of experiences that we would prefer not to live through but that give fiction a powerful push toward what every writer wishes to induce in a reader--the "willing suspension of disbelief" that Coleridge described in relation to such strange tales as he himself created.

The listing of characters early on is unusual. On the one hand it might seem to violate the familiar recommendation that one should allow characters to reveal themselves through their words and actions without direct description by the author, but on the other hand it creates the impression that what we are reading is drama. One is reminded of the leisurely descriptions of the dramatis personae in a Tennessee Williams play like The Glass Menagerie, given just before the devastating clashes of will that can so mesmerize even the most jaded audience.

And drama this is--a tale of greatly heightened emotion carried to the very brink of self-destruction as the MC endures terrors almost beyond imagination.

Highly recommended.

Brian G Chambers wrote 109 days ago

Hi JS
No wonder you are getting well wishes from people, this is a truly amazing believable story. You have captured the Psychosis perfectly. Ireally like first person stories (it feels like you are in the persons head) and your discriptions of how the MC ended up in a psychiatric hospital is told really well. You started from where you think the problems arose, but it seems as though your MC has had problems all her life. A truly remakable story. Very well done. I couldn't help but notice that your script jumped to the next line half way through a sentence though. Though probably this is due to a glitch on authonomy. You will do very well with this and thank you for sharing it and letting us read it.
Best wishes.
Brian..

Seringapatam wrote 114 days ago

JS Well done on a number fo counts. For coming through this and then writing something as cool as this. You are a special person. To laugh in the face of adversity and then come out with a read like this, I take my hat off to you. Brill story, great pitch. Nice flow and best of all you have very cleverly took these characters and used them to the full as and when you wanted to dictate and increase or decrease in pace. So well done and I am going to be scoring this very high. Loved it.
Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R) Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you?? Many thanks. Sean

c. ross wrote 118 days ago

Hi Judy,

Apart from your naturally flowing and engaging style, the story itself is riveting. At first I felt the long opening providing background might not be necessary, but by the slamming down of the receiver at the end of chapter one, I knew I was hooked. Your long pitch isolated a key scene that, when I came to it again in the first chapter, provided the perfect snapshot of Alexis's disorder (and I even thought it might make some sort of excellent image for a cover--a pile of comic books and clothes with feet sticking from beneath). I am mesmerized by the "Mommy of the Moment," and your paragraph describing Alexis's trepidation while talking to her on the phone is masterful.

Superficially, I'm guessing you've noticed the occasional random break in a line--I had some of the same formatting problems (and also the big breaks after paragraphs) until I turned on the formatting tracker in Word. I was quickly able to indent and eliminate strange breaks with extra lines. One very insignificant punctuation point: the comma before "(Yes, Gunner)" could be moved after the parentheses.

The line that will stick with me (and maybe a connection to your reference to the Panama operation at the beginning?) is this: "If we cut our mission short, we might have to come back for the same lessons." I sense that this entire work so far is a strategic operation for the narrator--both in attempted suicide and also in getting her life back together. Thanks for putting it here for someone like me to read.

c. ross
So Much Depends

carol jefferies wrote 120 days ago

Hi J S,

I was drawn to reading your book 'The Existence Game,' as i believe the more people learn about mental health issues, the better it will be for those affected. I also like reading biographies.

I can see how you suffered from such low self-esteem and high levels of anxiety from your family undermining your confidence, and then experiencing the tragic loss of a parent . Your mother with her unpredictable behaviour sounds a nightmare, compounding your feelings of failure.

Well done for simply surviving.

Good Luck with it,

Carol Jefferies
(A Prince Unboyed)
(Love for Lilian)
(A Kinsman's Chattel)

CATHERINE SHAW wrote 136 days ago

Wow!! powerful stuff. I will e certain to read this all the way through, having been diagnosed with this myself. I wish I had found this before. Top stars!!!!

JMF wrote 211 days ago

I thought this was an interesting read and wondered whether it's a memoir rather than fiction. Whichever it is, I think it would benefit from being broken up a little with some more dialogue as I did find it hard-going at times. I was intrigued by Alex's earlier life and her relationship with her mother, but I felt there were not enough details to really hook me in as a reader. It may be that you delve deeper into these things later on, but I wonder, as you mention how much your character's early life at home affected her, whether it would be a good idea to give some more concrete instances of what life was like for her at home. Just a thought.
You deal with some emotive, distressing issues very well and I wish you luck with your writing.
High stars to you.
Julia
Shadow Jumper

hockgtjoa wrote 247 days ago

I think there is a lot of good writing and character and (maybe) plot elements here for a good book. But as it is, it seems to be an outline of what might be in the book. Please do work on this so we can read what should be a wonderful story.

Lynne Heffner Ferrante wrote 259 days ago

Judy, An incredible insightful empathetic expression of what it feels like to live in the middle of dysfunction and illness. Anyone who has been there will immediately feel it; anyone who has not will experience it second hand but with true emotion. Your structure and writing are careful at the same time that they are totally evocative. the over all effect is charming and compelling. I can't wait to read the rest. Stars for you and you remain on my watch list for now until I have room on my shelf. Best Regards,

Lynne Heffner Ferrante
An Untenable Fragrance of Violets

Neville wrote 262 days ago

The Existence Game.
By J.S. Adams.


Alexis has clearly suffered from a very early age. She’s afraid to sleep at night without the safety of others around her. I felt that her mother contributed to the anxiety by way of her domineering attitude.
I thought that there was very little love there …she did throw Alexis out at eighteen, being the minimum age allowed by law to leave the confines of a family.
It’s a sad story that could well be a true life experience being told; even though it’s fiction it carries a lot of weight for the reader to think otherwise.
You have a good voice coming through and the dialogue is acceptable but at the same time it would enhance the story if there was more of it.
The attempted suicide and the hospital scene breathes new life into it just at the right time…a nice hook.
Pleased to star rate your book and wish it well.

Best regards,

Neville. ‘The Secrets of the Forest – Cosmos 501’ (Series) Book Two.

Lucy Middlemass wrote 262 days ago

The Existence Game

The long pitch tells me this is going to be ambitious and interesting. Good start. I’ve only read the first two chapters so far.

Chapter One

I think I’d like to know if this is a memoir or an work of fiction, but either way it’s a smooth read; it’s well-edited with a strong, straightforward voice.

Your main character’s relationship with her mother is drawn convincingly and is something I’m sure many women would recognise to some degree.

The matter-of-fact way of telling this story helps enormously in making it more relatable. If this is the viewpoint of someone who has struggled with mental illness, then it’s entirely right that we should be drawn into her world by things are regular and normal as childhood friendships and the rent. She is any of us.

I also like the whole “existence game” idea. For Alex, the idea of ending her life is not so unreasonable or remarkable. The “existence game” makes it seem somehow logical and palatable.

Chapter Two

Love the quotation at the beginning of this chapter.

“He looked like a sculpture of a huge infant.” is great. I like the Kevin character - the mini-stories about him are fun, and give the narrative good balance.

The GR part is good, especially the description of him being like a doting old lady. Really horrible, creepy and good.

I’ve enjoyed this, to the extent that something like this is intended to be enjoyed. Some of it makes for uncomfortable reading, especially the end of the second chapter. It’s well-edited with a good balance of flashbacks, plot progression and minor characters. I’m going to star it highly.

Lucy

Abby Vandiver wrote 263 days ago

The writing is good. I did see some grammatical errors. But I think that there is too much narrative. Paragraph can be exhausting to a reader. The story is interesting.

I was a bit confused because i thought Alex was 13. But then sge had a landlord and going to a pub.

Good start.

Abby

Su Dan wrote 263 days ago

this has a great premise that you write very well indeed with intelligence and skill...
backed...
read SEASONS...

Elizabeth Buhmann wrote 299 days ago

What a remarkable story. Is it fiction or memoir? Whichever, it is so unflinchingly honest that it is almost unbearable -- but at the same time, it is wry and captivating -- in sum, totally compelling and utterly convincing. It is beautifully written, in a quiet, matter-of-fact style that makes the powerful emotions all the more effective. I'll read more, but I wanted to let you know how much I admire your work so far. EB

Sue50 wrote 317 days ago

Incrediblly moving! Happy to put your work on my shelf. Hope you have a chance to look at Dark Side by CC Brown. Good Luck.
Sue50

terryj wrote 319 days ago

liked the premis, blurb, first person, character, and [at first] especially the style. super, i thought.
but after a few pages i began, honestly to find it a little too even paced, kind of like rrading someone's diary which, face it, isnt meant for publication?
and also by then i was forced to ask: is it actually ficton?
if it truly is then it's on the way to being great, but i'm aware that such things happen. i'd be a lot happier if i could be sure it was

FRAN MACILVEY wrote 319 days ago

Dear Judy

I just re-read most of what you posted here - I remember it from before, but I wanted to revisit it anyway, just for something great to read. Yours is truly wonderful writing.

You have a dead pan, very straight style which steers well clear of sentimentality. But for that reason, what you write about just hits home with me. I recognise so many of the self hatred and coping strategies, and some of the issues Alexis had to confront, although my experiences were not so intense as hers. Every word feels well considered and exactly placed, and conveys a wealth of meaning and internal gymnastics.

I am frankly in awe of your ability to convey Alex's predicament with such searing accuracy and straightforwardness.

Fran Macilvey, "Happiness Matters" xx :-))

Sam Rivers wrote 322 days ago

added to watch list v good x
Sam Rivers - The Balance of Your Life

Tod Schneider wrote 325 days ago

This is absolutely seamless writing! It just flows along so nicely; there aren't any bumps in this road! The tone of the writing, the voice of your main character, the dialog just all seem so fine-tuned. Normally I'd want more intensity throughout chapter 1, but you just write so nicely it doesn't much matter. Really good stuff! 6 stars!

Tod
http://authonomy.com/books/40646/the-lost-wink/

Kim Padgett-Clarke wrote 326 days ago

I found this very traumatic to read but compelling. I work in mental health so a lot of this rang true. I felt incredibly sorry for Alex having to exist with her fear of GR and being murdered and the extremes she has to go to to push her fears into the background and learn to live with them. The line that really got me was 'I'd never cut myself in the living room before. I didn't want to make a mess' That was so poignant it actually made me want to cry. You are a very talented writer. Well done.

Kim (Pain)

Keith Gilbey wrote 330 days ago

This is hard to read - because it is so raw - but that is why it works. Love to see more - well - want to see more - love is a bit strong for something that hurts so bad.

Keith

Olivia wrote 348 days ago

Hi Judy,

Well done on this, you have certainly managed to give us a very convincing protagonist and an inticing story to boot. I did feel that it was slightly rushed in places and would selfishly like to have seen some of this opening section drawn out more...I wanted to spend more time with the tortured child hiding in the wardrobe and see more of her early family experiences, as this is what ultimately shapes the person she becomes (maybe you return to all this again later). Overall though, it is very well written and I can see that you are doing very well with it and wish you all the best. Please give Elastic Girl a read when you get a chance. Best regards, Olivia

Beano wrote 350 days ago

This is faultless work, moving and inspirational. On my shelf with high stars.

il postino wrote 352 days ago

An uncomfortable read in the first few chaptersI read at least, which is testament to its strength. Great writing. I have watch listed it. Thank you. Best wishes, Il Postino (Kate) - Invisible Graffiti.

K J Anderson wrote 352 days ago

Simple, elegant, wonderful writing. Highly starred and backed.

Ted Draper wrote 358 days ago

Joe told me you had a good book, Judy, but he didn't say HOW good. Really outstanding stuff, pleased to back and rate it highly. Best regards, Ted

celticwriter wrote 358 days ago

Hi Judy, on my shelf again, going to re back you soon.
Nice nice nicely done.

blessings,
jim

patio wrote 389 days ago

Your story read well. Its addictive.

Collette Mondrial wrote 395 days ago

The writing in these three chapters is very good and, in parts, nothing short of exquisite. Backed and very highly starred.

Wanttobeawriter wrote 467 days ago

EXISTENCE GAME
This is an interesting look into mental illness. Alex is a great main character. She likable and sympathetic because of the way she’s feisty enough during the day to ruin a suit with pizza but a complete wreck at night because she can’t sleep. She does a good job describing the events that led up to making her the way she is. Highly starred and added to my shelf Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

sheila cooper wrote 489 days ago

A profouldly heartfelt story, A difficult subject to tackle but commendably presented. I have only read your first chapter but Already I feel for Alex, how she must have missed Jane and Chris in those early years. The brain numbing evidence of insiduous mental cruelty meeted out by the men who presumed to love Alex tugs strongly on emotion and compells the reader to open their hearts to her. Your easy discriptive talent allows the tale to unfold whilst keeping the reader on tenderhooks waiting for events to unfold. I could almost feel the pain and desperation of Alex particularly through her relationship with her mother. Highly starred and popped on my watchlist to check out more asap

grantdavid wrote 489 days ago

DearJudy, my time for reading is limited, so the fact that only 3 chapters are shown at present, and one of those was "errored" tonight, may have been an advantage, What I mean is that from the little I've read I've rarely tasted such a remarkable flavour in a book, nor been so eager to consume more, and be ready to finish up every morsel.
I see from those who have read it all that my opinion is justified. So then, "The Existence Game" is a top-quality book. I call it a "book", because one can't tell whether it's fact or fiction. That is not a criticism, it's a tribute.
Highest stars and the very next available place on my Shelf.
David Grant;
"Pompey Chimes"
21315/pompey chimes/david ogilvie grant

CarolinaV1975 wrote 506 days ago

Hello Judy,

Your book is one of the best books I have read so far in Authonomy. I will happily back you up and rate you 6 stars.
I wish you all the best,

Carolina
See the world through my eyes

Melissa Koehler wrote 533 days ago

ive come back for a couple more chapters and this is written so well, its unbelievable. so many emotions being propelled here that i just felt so involved with this story. this NEEDS to reach the ED.
5 stars.

Melissa Koehler wrote 536 days ago

ive read the first chapter and i have never felt this way before. i hung onto your every word. this is beautiful. dont change a thing.

will be back to read more. for sure.

hoping to hear your feedback on Gut Instincts,
melissa :)

Bill Carrigan wrote 552 days ago

Dear Judy,

Your husband kindly backed my novel and asked me to read and comment on "The Existence Game." I've read the first chapter with interest and admiration. The character Alex is so clearly pictured that I feel I've known her, and her torment at home, at school, and with her boyfriends is heart-rending. Yet her story is engaging and leaves me wanting to read more at chapter's end.

I have a few suggestions you might consider when you edit again. --Spell out "Washington, D.C.," since "D.C." may puzzle some readers. --Organize Alex's life experiences chronologically rather than skip around. --Introduce Nick in a line or two before describing the action with Gunner. --Try to find a substitute for the cliche "tip of the iceberg." --In speaking of "the madness at home," you should give some examples. --And again, in describing the Dorian episodes, "show" rather than "tell" would help bring the reader into the picture. Your dialogue with Mom is a good example of showing. All in all, the life you describe is riveting and makes Alex's attempted suicide entirely plausible.

I hope you'll read my novel "The Doctor of Summitville" as I continue to read yours. It's a love story about a young country doctor and an orphan girl during the great American Depression. Please tell Rummy346 that I'll soon have room on my shelf for "The Existence Game" and that I hope he'll back my book again.

Best wishes, Bill