Book Jacket

 

rank  Editors Pick
word count 132564
date submitted 05.03.2010
date updated 28.02.2011
genres: Romance, Non-fiction, Biography, Ch...
classification: universal
complete

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not -Bk I&II Tell Me True Love Stories Memoir

Susie Gulick

Memoir: Vulnerable. Love. Tragedies. Incest. Poverty. Survival. Lupus. Zero-seventy, breaking all Ten Commandments. Six marriages. Verbal and physical abuse from husbands. Testimony. God's love/agape.

 

Why have I always been physically and verbally abused, and unappreciated when I've always bent over backward to be a good wife, giving love anyway?

With God's help, I've weathered tragedies.

Incest on my father's side, still! My father molested my older sister since she was a baby, raped her from age five, threatening death to her and family, if she told - in 1947, told at age eleven. He was imprisoned. Raped her lots 1970 until my twin brother threatened him.

Granny raped by her father, so Mama and her brother were born. Granny castrated her father after he raped Mama when she was fifteen, birthed a son, put up for adoption, a secret until Mama was dying of cancer at age seventy-three, searched, found him, then told us six siblings.

My adventures. Sadnesses. Joys.

At age eleven, found my younger sister drowned.

When tiny, my Sunday School teacher prayed with me to ask Jesus to forgive my sins and come into my heart, so He has been there since then.

My quest for my true love, to be married "happily ever after" to my "Knight in Shining Armor," with He Love Me, He Loves Me Not always happening!

 
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abuse, adoption, anemea, anger, autobiograpy, baptist, bible, california, calvary, cancer, chico, christian, chronic-fatigue, commandments, crushes, d...

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     Do or Die

     “Are you going to the Singles’ weekend retreat next Friday?” I asked Tom after a Friday Night Singles’ meeting at the church.  Everyone, including me, was crowding around the refreshment tables that were set up on one side of the room.  He had come all of the way across the room for our ritual long bear hug.  These hugs had been ongoing three times a week after each church meeting for the last month since we first met each other on February 25, 2002.

     Norm wasn’t even the least bit interested in me, nor was Doug who I thought was cute, but he liked someone else, who didn’t return the same feelings.  So, I decided that Tom was better than nothing.  At least he liked me. That’s probably what he had decided, too, since the three different girls he had chosen didn’t like him back.  All of us were victims of “unrequited love, for sure.

     At least, I loved the way Tom danced.  Under the stars in front of Norm’s apartment since his front room was packed out his front door, was where we had first done the swing – one, two, three, rock.  I could dance with him forever.  I had kept dreaming of our dancing, replaying it over and over in my mind since the potluck at Norm’s house the previous Saturday.  I had loved the feeling of floating in the slow dances and doing the swing in the faster oldies like, “Rock Around the Clock.”  We did it very well and everyone watched as Tom twirled me around and around.

     “I was thinking of going to the retreat,” Tom responded after a few moments.  “It’s at Lake Arrowhead?” he asked.  “I’ve never been up there.”

     “I haven’t either,” I responded, “but it sounds really fun.”

     “I’ll call you up and let you know if I decide to go.  Okay?” he asked.  “Could I get your phone number?”

     “Of course,” I said joyously as we exchanged phone numbers.  Wedding bells rang in my heart.  This was going to be a relationship where I’m really loved, ran through my mind because I knew Tom always sought me out and really liked me.  He was totally shy, though, so conversation was kinda slow.  On Friday nights, he always sat by me at the restaurant after Singles’ church meeting where we had our clique meetings.

     “I’ve decided to go to the Singles’ retreat,” Tom told me on the phone the next Tuesday.

     “Great,” I replied excitedly.  “I’ll see you there.”

     “Could my friend and I get a ride from you, Tom?” I asked when I phoned him on Thursday.  “We haven’t been able to find anyone that we can ride with.”  Of course, this was on purpose so that I could ride with him.

    “I won’t be able to go until later in the evening,” Tom apologized.  “My car has so much stuff in it that there’s no room.  I also have to go shopping when I get off of work.  I’ll get up to Arrowhead really late.  Maybe you can find someone,” he suggested.

     “I’ll try,” I despondently replied.

     We did find a ride and he did get there way after mealtime, during the evening meeting.  I motioned for him to come and sit with our group.

     The next day, after lunch, was free-time for the afternoon.  Tom came over for his bear-hug.  We walked over to the back of the sanctuary.

     “I can do cart-wheels and backbends,” I bragged to Tom, when he had brought up exercising.  It had been years since I had, but I had no doubt that I still could do them.  I looked around to be sure no one else was there.  I balanced on my spread feet and bent backward until my hands touched the floor.  It was totally embarrassing when I couldn’t stand back up.

     “You will have to put your arm under my back to help me stand back up,” I called to Tom with my head upside down.

     “Okay,” he agreed, then, raised me up.  That was April 8, 1992.  He was thirty-six years old and I was fifty-two, but I looked like his age, he had told me.  He couldn’t believe I was so much older than he.

     “Would you like to go over to Arrowhead Village?” I asked Tom.

     “Sure,” he smiled.

     As we walked along the shore, I started to pick up small beautiful rocks since I was a collector.  Tom volunteered to carry them for me.  All of this time, our interchange of information about everything was non-stop.  It included likes and dislikes, childhood events, you name it.  Our walk continued as we looked in all of the shops’ windows and he bought ice cream cones for us.

     After we returned for dinner, we went for a walk down a trail to a fireplace.  He hugged me and lightly kissed my lips.  It was “true love for sure, as we smiled at each other.  We began to hold hands as we walked.

     “Do you want to go to the rec-room?” I asked.

     “Sure,” Tom responded excitedly.

     “I used to be the ping pong champ at camp when I was in high school,” I bragged.

     “I like ping pong, too” Tom rejoined.

    “Forty-nine, fifty!” I counted, as we volleyed the ping pong ball back and forth.  Then, I missed.  We were in love, was my feeling as we laughed and talked together.
 
     When we parted to go to our rooms, Tom prayed for me and I prayed for him as we hugged, then kissed goodnight.  This was Saturday night.

     You could see us holding hands during the Sunday morning meetingTom even cleared out his front seat from books and clutter to bring me back home, down the hill of five thousand feet elevation in the San Bernardino Mountains southeast of Los Angeles.  He even stopped at my request at my best friend, Marilyn’s house which was on the way to my house.

     “This is going to be my new husband,” I whispered to Marilyn.  Her response was shock, but she knew anyone I ever liked, my endeavor was to marry them.

     For the next six months, Tom came over to see me after work every day and took me out to dinner wherever I choseThen, we talked and kissed endlessly until midnight.  He lived a half hour drive from meAfter this courting period, we got married at the Orange County Courthouse September 14, 1992.  We’ve been married eighteen years.

     The bad news is that Tom got laid-off from his seven year job at aerospace the day after we got married.  Ten months later, after working sixty hours each week to make ends meet financially, I got sharp pains in my side at work and couldn’t stand up.  It took three months to diagnose my condition as shingles which you can get from stress if you have had chicken pox.  I’ve been permanently disabled ever since.

     Tom’s 401K savings of $40,000.00 was gone within a year and he couldn’t find work, finally ending up as a retail clerk at a drug store, from $20.00 an hour to $6.00 an hour.  My wage went from $30,000.00 annual income to under $10,000.00 per year received from permanent disability payments.

     Needless to say, our bliss was ended by stress.  Love is turned into hate when we have hollering heated arguments, even to the point of divorce being the solution.  Most argument are caused by Tom’s being upset that I can’t work to help pay bills because of my lupus and his genetic mental problems controlled by medication which in nullified when his addiction to diet coke which is three liters within an hour more than once a day occurs.  We have our ups and downs, but we have God in the middle and He’s working on both of us.  Morning and evening Bible reading always is a must for us and we hug and pray for each others each time we part.

     Our vacations have been twice with the Married Couples group to Hawaii, a weekend drive to San Francisco, returning through Carmel, a weekend Ensenada cruise, a two- week Caribbean Cruise of which the third day was the bombing of the New York towers, and a Jon Courson of Applegate Community Church Alaska Cruise.  We’ve taken our kids and grandkids the past eight years for a week long Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa family camp.  Married Couples retreats at Murrieta twice and once at Twin Peaks, we have also enjoyed.

     To be able keep the communication open with God and also between each other, our attitude has to be, “Do or Die.”

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HarperCollins Wrote

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not is a tour de force of a memoir. It’s the powerful story of a girl called Myra who is born into a violent home – a world filled with incest, paedophilia and violence.

Gulick opens her story with a surreal, dreamlike sequence of a mother in labour on an icy lake. The story’s beginning, set before Myra’s earliest memories, has the feeling of a myth, slightly removed from reality. It’s the strange, dark prehistory of Myra’s life and a vivid opening to the book.

As the narrative of Myra’s life progresses, the author skilfully adapts her writing to match. The dark, surreal language of the pre-life era morphs imperceptibly into the sunny, childlike prose of Myra’s early years. In later years this becomes a clear, matter-of-fact style, occasionally harsh and grating, reflecting Myra’s adult life and the new hardships she faces. This is exceptional writing.

Myra’s upbringing is a compelling mix of sweet and sour. Her cheerfulness – which is only matched by the cheerfulness of her mother and siblings – coexists with the dark side of her heritage. Generations of incest, violence, paedophilia and infant mortality lie hidden beneath every idyllic sunny day. These elements threaten to explode at every twist of the tale – and sometimes do, with dark consequences.

The strength of this story is Susie’s likeability and strength. She inherits this, it seems, from generations of strong women before her, and passes it on to her children in the same way. It’s satisfying to see the dark past linked intensely and movingly with the present.

However, the deeply personal, self-contained nature of this story means it will not be taken under consideration for publication at this time.

Although the story is highly readable and genuinely endearing, this is Susie’s personal story. It can never be anyone else’s. For this reason, sadly, we will have to pass on it. But this should not, under any circumstances, put a damper on Susie’s writing, which is graceful, heart-warming and unique.

SusieGulick wrote 1255 days ago

I've begun reading Susie Guilick's "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not - Book I. Don't let the itemized list of tragedies in the pitch discourage you. Pitches are tough to write, especially for a modest author - simple advice to authors, avoid lists in the pitch. This is true for Susie Guilick, especially as the narrative in her memoir immediately transports readers to a wholly different mindset. The author's writing style is clean and engaging, and most important, accessible to readers across a spectrum of ages.

The memoir leans heavily on terrible events, which batter the lives of the characters. A reader wonders if everything in the memoir can be true. Realistically, the trials are all packed into a full, if not pleasant life. The challenges are like Job's labors and coping with them layer a Christian theme on the memoir. At first, I was a dissuaded by the emphasis on the love for Jesus, but again, the narrative is much deeper and the proclamation is necessary, for the sake of sanity and humanity in this memoir. Susie Guilick is a wonderful storyteller. The author catches the attention of the reader and holds it with a pattern of emotional "highs" and "lows."

Matthew Sawyer - author of the Pazuzu Trilogy
November, 2010



Dear Matthew,

I am so happy to hear from you & that you commented on my book. :) I notice that you have no books on your shelf. To back books: In "my news," click on author's name which will bring up their profile page, on which you scroll down & click on their book cover & title, which will bring up their book. :) Over to the right, you'll see ******-rating, so click on the right star & then click on "read the book" which will bring it to your bookshelf & you will see it. :) On top left of your screen, click "me" & it will bring you back to where you started. :) Let me know if I can help more. :)

With pleasure, I read, commented on, ******-rated, & put your book on watchlist, to back when space opens on my bookshelf. :)

I am totally amazed at your beautiful heartfelt review of my story which I wrote from my heart with a lot of crying, feelings, & prayer & the underlying message that God loves me in spite of myself & my bad choices. :)

Thank you so very much for taking all of the time for me & for your encouraging word & feedback. :)

Love, Susie :)
p.s. hope you ******-rated my book :) - every ******-ing & backing moves our books closer to the editor's desk :)

Hunter A wrote 1314 days ago

This particular quick review will not address editing, the nature of foreshadowing used at the end of each chapter or the use of capitalizations for emphasis (after all, who am I to say?).
He Love Me, He Loves Me Not--a Memior by Susie Gulick
This work of 134,000 plus words is a remarkable piece of work in my view for a number of reasons. First, it is mostly done in dialog--it is astounding recall by the author, it quickly brings the reader into hard human life in America--so hard, and it is non-stop. I question whether I can possibly do it justice. The answer is that I cannot, however, I will attempt to capture the book(s) as best that I can.
It is a story of human life, human tragedy, human mistakes and inhuman people close to her. It is a story of one's search for joy against a stereotype perhaps formed early in life out of neccessity--I will not decipher this element any more than that. It was as if every time there was a little bit of happiness or joy for the children early in the memoir, something terrible would rise up to claim it away. For me it was a study of a family who had virtually nothing in the forties and fifties but most somehow managed to survive and at least grow into better physical surroundings--but emotionally were being injured on meeting new people (or employers) and the pain although a different kind, did not stop. The sixties in my view is a glimpse into the so-called sexual revolution many people participated in I suppose, and the author relates the era in such a way that many of us may interpret as cold and best forgotten.
Toward the eighties, nineties and through today, the reader can feel the history of this person and how it still affects her--when inhuman actions are taken against another, there are always lasting effects and I sense that here. It is a labor intensive work and I admire the author for sticking to it. It is easy to cry in chapter one and nurse a headache for the confused actions being revealed in later chapters.
I highly recommend the book. My preference would be to combine it all into one and use the richness of the prose in book two in one title--but that's just me and again, I am hardly qualified to fully appreciate the all this author has given us--she does give us everything.

Hunter Ayers
September, 2010

SusieGulick wrote 1362 days ago

To Suzie Q

Firstly can I apologise for my late response to you and a considerable number of other Authonomy writers. Unfortunately - when duty calls and all that jazz1
I'm truly bowled over by your comments on my book, The Contractor. To have you describe it as the 'best one on Authonomy' gives my confidence a terrific boost and I'm sure you can understand the need for confidence. I'm planning a sequel to The Contractor which is where confidence is needed as I'm finding it even more difficult to write than The Contractor. Here's me thinking it would be easier. The Contractor has taken me over two years and I know I have a load of work yet to do..

For someone only 5' tall, you sure pack a real punch with your writing lady. I'm going to admit to something on paper that I would not do on a face to face interview. When I read some of the passages in your books, I had a lump in my throat and for that to happen to me takes a lot of doing.

It's not fashionable these days to carry your love of Jesus Christ as open as you do, but it's something I admire.
Some people will tell you that they only turned to Jesus, many soldiers included, when badly wounded or when all appeared to be lost.

I'm delighted to back you ten times over and that's because I 'm sure I'm backing at least one 'best seller.'

Frank James (The Contractor)



Dear James,

I am so happy that you took the time for me, to read, back, & comment on my memoir book, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not." :)

I loved your book & know that you will do well on your next one. :)

From my heart, I wrote my story with a lot of tears, feelings, & prayter - God loves me in spite of myself & my bad choices - & I never give up. :)

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of your kind reflections. :)

Love, Susie :)
p.s. Hope you'll take a moment to back my other memoir book, "Tell Me True Love Stories." :) Thanks. :)

JohnnyVee wrote 1369 days ago

Came to read your two books as requested and got merrily slapped in the face and dragged inside. My wholly positive comment and eager backing are the same for both books. Memoirs, or even `tales` of human living and suffering will always engage readers because it is good `story` which matters; and you have suffering (good story) in droves. To that end, you’re already off to a flying start. But that’s not the main player here. It’s your wonderful voice. You carry a certain fresh naivety in your tone which captivates - and I mean that in a completely positive way. A naivety which grips reader and pulls him through the `story` - the `suffering` - It’s a page turner. Good luck with this!

Jane Law wrote 275 days ago

Hi I just read up to Chap13. Your book begins well but then it becomes kinds repetitive. I decided it was because it lacks humour and you don't show much insight into what's going on. Can't quite put my finger on it but left me feeling very dissatisfied with the writer. Sorry but that's me being honest. Jane

ibholdvictory wrote 672 days ago

Touching Account, Bet this book will inspire and strengthen your readers. God Loves you more.

ibholdvictory wrote 672 days ago

Touching Account, Bet this book will inspire and strengthen your readers. God Loves you more.

strachan gordon wrote 977 days ago

I must say I found this tremendously sad reading , to the extent that it was very difficult to finish the first chapter.But , of course , it is amazing that you are still here . I dont know as yet whether you have found your Knight in Shining Armour. I don't know if you have the time , but I wonder if you would be able to look at the first chapter of my novel 'A Buccaneer' , which is about Pirates in the 17th century , with best wishes , Strachan Gordon

John Doney wrote 992 days ago

I haven't been on here for a while due to other things and just read what Harper Collins wrote about your book. What they've said is very true but one thing they haven't added is how brave you are to have done it. It takes a lot for someone to expose their life like this. I've been writing another book that documents my adventures over the last year and some things are hard to write about and within your book you've tackled a lot of complicated things and I just wanted to say how proud you should feel of being voted by everybody and getting to the top slot on this site.
I hope somewhere will find this book and help you get your story told to even more people.
All the best, John.

John Doney wrote 992 days ago

I haven't been on here for a while due to other things and just read what Harper Collins wrote about your book. What they've said is very true but one thing they haven't added is how brave you are to have done it. It takes a lot for someone to expose their life like this. I've been writing another book that documents my adventures over the last year and some things are hard to write about and within your book you've tackled a lot of complicated things and I just wanted to say how proud you should feel of being voted by everybody and getting to the top slot on this site.
I hope somewhere will find this book and help you get your story told to even more people.
All the best, John.

Cheri Moffitt wrote 1078 days ago

What a wild ride this one is!! I just tore through six chapters and look forward to coming back for more...

SusieGulick wrote 1107 days ago

So in other words, real stories no too personal too close to the bone forget it... we go for the garbage..
Good stuff Susie this site is crap and there is no reason to aim for the editor's desk.
A dog could give a better review ~



Dear John,

Afterthought on my response to your comment on my memoirs/testimony book, "He Loves Me" is that I was only wanting their review and was not trying to get published by HarperCollins because, what is the statistics on what I heard that they have only published 7 books since authonomy has been on the web for 3 years? :) I am totally pleased that God gave me grace, mercy, & favor in their sight & gave me a wonderful review - better than I ever dreamt or imagined. :)

I am still extremely sick as I'm sure you've read on my profile page & am only answering messages, so barely on authonomy. :) I'm not able to finish my 2nd book, "Bible Verse Songs" which I put on authonomy 3-1-11 that I'd been writing down Bible verses over the past year that have been put to song & I made it like a hymnal :) - Campus Crusade & Youth For Christ, when I was growing up had a similar booklet with choruses' words without the music. :) It has gone from 4080 to 2075 from the editor's desk. :)

Love, Susie :)

SusieGulick wrote 1117 days ago

So in other words, real stories no too personal too close to the bone forget it... we go for the garbage..
Good stuff Susie this site is crap and there is no reason to aim for the editor's desk.
A dog could give a better review ~



Dear John,

Thank you for taking the time for me & sending me your comment on "He Loves Me." :) To be chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk was my last goal because I've achieved all my other goals & am now old & sick which I'm sure you've read in my profile page, with my only strength being in the Lord. :)

I just re-read your submission & was again thankful that I don't work in mines & have the same conclusion that I'd try to escape. :) I also checked to be sure that I had gold-******-rated your book. :)

Thanks again. :)

Love, Susie :)

polymatrixdragon wrote 1117 days ago

So in other words, real stories no too personal too close to the bone forget it... we go for the garbage..
Good stuff Susie this site is crap and there is no reason to aim for the editor's desk.
A dog could give a better review ~

SusieGulick wrote 1117 days ago

Hi Susie
Havn't been on the site in a while but delighted to see you got a review but equally sad that they didn't want to publish. I think you should go to a publisher who specialises in 'misery memoirs' now you have a good review under your belt. Don't stop now xx



Dear Christine,

It is so nice of you to take the time to send me your best wishes. :)

I went to your page & don't see your book - did you get it published? :) It's not there.

I notice you have my "He Loves Me" memoirs/testimony book on your shelf. :)

Hope you'll put my new book, "Bible Verse Songs" on your shelf, too. :) I put it on authonomy 3-1-11. :)

Thanks so much for writing to me. :)

Love, Susie :)

indigoadventures wrote 1117 days ago

Hi Susie
Havn't been on the site in a while but delighted to see you got a review but equally sad that they didn't want to publish. I think you should go to a publisher who specialises in 'misery memoirs' now you have a good review under your belt. Don't stop now xx

SusieGulick wrote 1117 days ago

I can't imagine a comment from a so-called professional reviewer being less relevant and as entirely useless and unhelpful as that! It's an absolute disgrace and makes me feel genuinely sorry for all the time and effort that you put into the writing and the process of getting to the Ed's desk. If anything proves how wasteful and heartbreaking this actually can turn out to be, then this is it! Shame on HP and their miserable, blinkered and narrow-minded staff!



Dear Vanessa,

Thank you for taking the time for me. :)

God bless you. :)

Love, Susie :)

Vanessa Darnleigh wrote 1118 days ago

I can't imagine a comment from a so-called professional reviewer being less relevant and as entirely useless and unhelpful as that! It's an absolute disgrace and makes me feel genuinely sorry for all the time and effort that you put into the writing and the process of getting to the Ed's desk. If anything proves how wasteful and heartbreaking this actually can turn out to be, then this is it! Shame on HP and their miserable, blinkered and narrow-minded staff!

Orlando Furioso wrote 1118 days ago

Greetings, thankyou for making your HC review public. I read it with great interest. You worked hard to get that review.

My observation on the review is this: I am puzzled why the reviewer concludes that the personal nature of your story precludes it from publication. It is after all a personal recollection, so clearly it is self-contained and no one else's story. That is the nature of all biography and all of HC's True Life brand is it not?

I sincerely hope their comments on your story and writing style may help you to arouse interest elsewhere.

Ron Askew

SusieGulick wrote 1130 days ago

The sensitivity of the mother was beautiful. Their poverty tragic as was their fear of Byron Sr. This was unbelievability good writing and raw and real and... did I say good? This was so smooth and flowed so well - your talent is obvious.
The only part I'd criticize, if I were forced to find something, would be the dialogue when Byron was lost in ch 1. It didn't seem as natural as it did everywhere else.
Oh, and I love the songs and her sayings are great.
I've read through chapter - whew those are long chapters. Great hook for the end of ch 2.
- lisa



Dear Lisa,

It was so nice of you to read & back my memoirs/testimony book. :) It was chosen on the editor's desk March 1, 2011, but my other book, "Bible Verse Songs" is 2813 from the editor's desk if you could back it for me instead. :)

You are amazing that you commented on, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not," too. :) Thank you for your encouraging words & suggestions. :) I appreciate your taking the time for me. :)

Love, Susie :)

lterry wrote 1130 days ago

The sensitivity of the mother was beautiful. Their poverty tragic as was their fear of Byron Sr. This was unbelievability good writing and raw and real and... did I say good? This was so smooth and flowed so well - your talent is obvious.
The only part I'd criticize, if I were forced to find something, would be the dialogue when Byron was lost in ch 1. It didn't seem as natural as it did everywhere else.
Oh, and I love the songs and her sayings are great.
I've read through chapter - whew those are long chapters. Great hook for the end of ch 2.
- lisa

SusieGulick wrote 1143 days ago

did HC Publish your work?

Andrew Doyle



Dear Andrew,

Thanks so much for your help & caring. :) I am backing books in order, so I will come to yours, in case you are wondering. :)

It takes about a month for authonomy to review books after they are chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk & that's all it is - they read the 1st 10,000 words & give a review. :) Someone told me that they have only published 6 books since they started almost 3 years ago, any chances are totally slim, but I really did want the review because I have nothing else to live for & it was my last goal, because I'm so sick & I am only still going with God's strength. :) I did put my new book, "Bible Verse Songs" on because it was a snap since I had been started the list ages ago & kept adding & still am & just needed to enter them, but authonomy made me rewrite it twice & hopefully it's acceptable, but it's just the Bible verses & stanzas & not the song words - I was just trying to bless people around the world that know the songs, many since I was little, but don't know the references, so could look them up or sing from the ones I remembered. :)

Love, Susie :)

andrew DOYLE wrote 1143 days ago

did HC Publish your work?

Andrew Doyle

SusieGulick wrote 1147 days ago

I really like your story's premise and the intensity of all the trauma as well as the inspiration and motivation that emerges as a result of it. well done!



Dear Arlynn,

It's so nice of you taking the time to comment on my memoirs/testimony book, "He Loves Me." :) Thank you for your most encouraging word. :)

I put a 2nd book on authonomy 2 days ago, "Bible Songs," if you want to look at it, too. :)

I was totally blessed reading your 2 books & have gold ******-rated, read, commented on them. :)

Love, Susie :)

Kairi wrote 1147 days ago

I really like your story's premise and the intensity of all the trauma as well as the inspiration and motivation that emerges as a result of it. well done!

SusieGulick wrote 1147 days ago

Hello Susie, This is written with a great deal of courage and heart and I wish you every success with it. I have placed it on my shelf with a high star rating.
If you can find the time, I would really appreciate it if you could take a look at either of my two books. Thank you.

Phyllis
PAPER DREAMS & A PASSING STORM



Dear Phyllis,

It was so nice of you to ******, back & comment on my book, "He Loves Me" - I just put another book on, "Bible Songs" & hope you'll ****** & back it, too. :)

With pleasure I read & commented on your 1st book, "A Passing Storm" 254 days ago & just read & commented on your delightful Katie story, "Paper Dreams" & am hoping for a happy ending. :) I have also gold ******-rated both of your books. :)

Love, Susie :)

SusieGulick wrote 1147 days ago

Sussie, I have read a few chapters of your book and find your story engaging and well written. Keep it up and congratulations.
Matthew Uzukwu, author of Women of Steel.



Dear Matthew,

I am so happy to hear from you & that you backed & commented on my memoirs/testimony book, "He Loves Me." :)

With pleasure, I read & commented on your heart-rending story of the southeastern Nigerian women & love that you have share it with the world :) - I had no idea anything like this happened, so I am most thankful for your sharing. :)

I have a new book, "Bible Songs How I Remember Them," if you want to ****** & back it. :) Thank you. :)

Love, Susie :)

andrew DOYLE wrote 1148 days ago

Suzie,
I have just purchased my first copy of The Lost Monks of Avalon.....

after all the anguish, trials and tribulations, and of course some negativity from some, but not all...

http://sbpra.com/andrewdaviddoyle

Andrew David Doyle

Bridget Dunn wrote 1149 days ago

Congrats on making the ED. If anyone deserves to have their story in print, it is you. I hope it all works out for you.

Bridget

Concettah wrote 1150 days ago

Congratulations on being selected Susie :) best of luck to you! God Bless.
Concetta

SusieGulick wrote 1150 days ago

Hello Susie, This is written with a great deal of courage and heart and I wish you every success with it. I have placed it on my shelf with a high star rating.
If you can find the time, I would really appreciate it if you could take a look at either of my two books. Thank you.

Phyllis
PAPER DREAMS & A PASSING STORM



Dear Phyllis,

Thank you so very much for taking the time for me & for gold ******-rating & backing & commenting on my memoirs/testimony book. :) Yes, I wrote my true story from my heart with a lot of emotions & prayer & with the underlying thread that God loves me in spite of myself. :)

I will be reading & commenting on your book this week & backing it when space opens on my bookshelf. :)

Love, Susie :)

SusieGulick wrote 1150 days ago

As I am new to commenting on this site, I wanted to read some of the top rated books. I am sorry but I read your book to Chapter 6, and where I am sure people find the content shocking or moving, this is a writers' site. The writing is in my opinion rather poor and stilted, and is all content and no style. However, you have worked well to reach the desk. Good luck.



Dear Judge Jeffreys,

Thank you for taking the time for my true life verbatim story. :)

Love, Susie :)

Judge Jeffreys wrote 1150 days ago

As I am new to commenting on this site, I wanted to read some of the top rated books. I am sorry but I read your book to Chapter 6, and where I am sure people find the content shocking or moving, this is a writers' site. The writing is in my opinion rather poor and stilted, and is all content and no style. However, you have worked well to reach the desk. Good luck.

Phyllis Burton wrote 1151 days ago

Hello Susie, This is written with a great deal of courage and heart and I wish you every success with it. I have placed it on my shelf with a high star rating.
If you can find the time, I would really appreciate it if you could take a look at either of my two books. Thank you.

Phyllis
PAPER DREAMS & A PASSING STORM

Amobi wrote 1151 days ago

Sussie, I have read a few chapters of your book and find your story engaging and well written. Keep it up and congratulations.
Matthew Uzukwu, author of Women of Steel.

Amobi wrote 1151 days ago

I have read a few chapters and find the story engaging and well written. Congratulations.
Matthew.

marcoslee wrote 1152 days ago

Congratulations, Susie, you're amazing. You've told your story from the heart, like everything else you say and do, have persisted and won over the whole community. And, thanks for being into Revolution or Extinction. Mark Lee Krangle

SusieGulick wrote 1152 days ago

I only read the first three chapters of books on this site as there are so many to comment on.

You write good dialog and that the characters speak with their own voice; that the prose is well structured.

However, I found that you repeated and over used certain words. For example, you use the word 'Shack' three times the first paragraph and a half and over use such phrases as 'he answered' and 'he said'.

Pace felt a little quick. I was looking for more description and a little more 'show' than 'tell' ; some space for the characters to breathe also

Also, like many books on here after three chapters I should have a sense of the story and I don't. You are obviously talented with a concise style but this should serve the story/narrative which is central.

There's a good book in here but it needs puffing up and editing a little.

Good luck



Dear R.J.,

I am so happy to hear from you & that you commented on my memoirs/testimony book :) - if you backed it, it didn't come through - could you please try again because I have been trying for almost a year to be chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk & was #4 on 1-1-11, but 2 people passed me, pushing me out to #6, so I didn't get chosen January 31 - I am now #1 & need a lot of backings to anchor me in so that I don't slide out again & so that I can be chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk February 28. :) Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your help. :)

With pleasure, I spent a long time reading & commenting on your adventurous Jacob & Angelika story. :) I hope you will write many more exciting books. :)

I have also gold ******-rated your book :) - could you please ****** & back my memoirs/testimony book in return? :)

It was so very nice of you to take the time for me & to send me all of your feedback :) - I really appreciate it :) - I think I have an editor & publisher, now, because I am so very ill to do anything on it, as you probably read on my profile page & my last goal in life is to be chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk. :)

I would really appreciate your help. :)

Love, Susie :)
p.s. every ******-ing moves our books up authonomy's lists, as does backing more than 24 hours & the longer on our bookshelves, the more they move up, per authonomy's new rules 2010 :) - on your profile page in "my news," click on author's name & when their profile page comes up, scroll down & click on their book cover or title & their book will come up & over to the right is "my rating" with 6 silver ******-s under & if your click the far right *, they will all turn gold, then, click on "back the book"

SusieGulick wrote 1152 days ago

Your story is one of sorrow but I can see that through your love of God you have grown as a person. Your book will definitely make the editor's desk and I will back this book until you succeed. Thank you for commenting on my book also. I look forward to more of your work, and hope that you book will be published :)



Dear Andrew,

I am so happy to hear from you & that you commented on & backed my memoirs/testimony book :) - you're wonderful to keep it on your shelf to help me. :)

With pleasure, I read & commented on your honest-to-God view of the world. :) You make me smile. :)

I have also gold ******-rated your book :) - could you please ****** & back my memoirs/testimony book, too? :)

Thank you so much very much for taking the time for me & for your encouraging me in the Lord. :) Yes, a lot of tears went into my true story with underlying thread that God loves me in spite of myself :) - he loves much who is forgiven much. :)

Love, Susie :)
p.s. try to get another fast moving green arrow book in your open space of your shelf so that your book will move even faster to the editor's desk - don't choose red arrows or they'll bring you down - unless, of course, mine gets a red arrow - I'll be screaming, "help!!" & be able to be heard all the way to China :)

SusieGulick wrote 1152 days ago

I love the way Susie hits the reader straight between the eyes: Yes! I got raped! Was that the price of dinner? (Chp15). A story that might exhaust more delicate readers with its relentless energy and drama.



Dear Phil,

It is so nice of you to comment on my memoirs/testimony book. :) It was extremely traumatic to write my true story, which I wrote in 1997 & then kept re-writing & lots more emotions each time, through a lot of writing seminars & writing classes until I finally finished a year ago & got it on authonomy. :) I'm so glad that I have not given up when I'm so ill & am finally from of 6000 away from the editor's desk to #1 & I'll happier if I can stay in the top 5 to be chosen February 28. :) It's from my reading & commenting on thousands of books when it's hard to even sit here, but God helped me & I've almost made it, hopefully. :)

Thank you for taking the time for me & for giving me such high encouraging words. :)

Love, Susie :)
p.s. Why not try to add 3 fast moving green arrow books onto your bookshelf, so you'll go from #4045 red arrow to green arrows & to #1 :) - I've seen within a month, like Malika who is on my bookshelf :) - she was #1083 on 2-2-11 &is now #28, only 24 days later. :)

kcwilson wrote 1153 days ago

"She rushed about in a dither!"

I fell into this story right away and felt comfortable with the narrator until this sentence struck me as one that foreshadowed chattiness, maybe, or some form of excess over economy. Just a little flare went up in my mind, that's all. But it made me realize that anyone reading your story to the end must make a commitment. You require that of a reader and that kind of confidence is hard to turn away from. But the end of your life story is a long way off and before I commit to reading about you from the time you were born, maybe you could ease me into the tale with a little introduction. It's just my initial feeling that your narrator is wound up tighter than Dick's hatband and trying hard not to sound other than spontaneous. That pitch-perfect volubility may prove difficult to sustain. I think it's all a matter of striking the right tone and then modulating the pacing. If it gets too frantic to read out loud, it's going too fast. That's true for me, anyway. I'm no expert at pacing. But I've not yet committed to reading your whole life story. I am reading on, however. With pleasure.

Gregg A Granger wrote 1153 days ago

"He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not" is a treasure. I finished chapter 2, and will continue as time permits. I'm hooked.
Gregg Granger - Author of Sailing Faith: The Long Way Home

IlyaKralinsky wrote 1153 days ago

In honoring your request to read your work, I will admit you've created quite the controversy and publicity, so your promotional skills are par excellence. In reading the work, your locales are interesting, your characters came through, but here are my key points of contention:

See if you can't recraft some of your prose to get out of passive voice. This was/were for everything tends to jump out and slow things down in the worst way. We're competing with Internet, movies and television for the collective attention of an audience, and we're losing precisely because too many writers are unwilling to let go of, or recraft, a slowed-down voice that, while seemingly natural, can really get a reader to put down a book.

Point Two: Overdone Dialogue. Exclamation points after everything stands out and dissuades a reader from continuing. One of the big abilities in mastering dialogue comes from being able to convey tone and mood from word choice. This is simply a practiced skill that arrives from a cognizance that it has to be mastered.

Point Three: a tendency to describe dialogue as it happens is another sign the author feels a weakness is conveying tone and mood through dialogue, and readers do pick up on this. He exclaimed, she sang -- more precise verbs are fantastic for general narrative, but offering this variety of desriptive verbs after nearly every line of dialogue can grow trite.

Point Four: First Person Voice and Its Pitfalls: It took me a bit to catch onto the first person voice, but it comes across even after presenting what seems a third person omniscient voice. First person is one of those points of view that many beginning writers feel frees them to express any string of drivel in any amount they wish with any words that pop off the tops of their heads. This is untrue. In The Sound and the Fury, Faulkner uses first person to highlight unique voices and tell his story in the way a third person narrator could never possibly do, heightening the art of what he did and creating a new paradigm in literature art in several ways. It seems if something could be told in third person, do it; if it must be in first person, the voice must be unique enough to move the story in a direction and lend dimension it ordinarily would not have. Moreover, when writing with this unique voice in first person, the writing still has to be clean and move forward in some measurable degree; first person does not provide justification for stream-of-consciousness without defined storyline. This mistake is most commonly committed by a reader largely uninitiated in the subtle nuance of literary work who cannot spot the elements that make it noteworthy.

Otherwise, you have a genuine piece of work here, formatted like a real book, that tells a story. Good luck to you.

RJU74 wrote 1153 days ago

I only read the first three chapters of books on this site as there are so many to comment on.

You write good dialog and that the characters speak with their own voice; that the prose is well structured.

However, I found that you repeated and over used certain words. For example, you use the word 'Shack' three times the first paragraph and a half and over use such phrases as 'he answered' and 'he said'.

Pace felt a little quick. I was looking for more description and a little more 'show' than 'tell' ; some space for the characters to breathe also

Also, like many books on here after three chapters I should have a sense of the story and I don't. You are obviously talented with a concise style but this should serve the story/narrative which is central.

There's a good book in here but it needs puffing up and editing a little.

Good luck

Andrew Keeton wrote 1153 days ago

Your story is one of sorrow but I can see that through your love of God you have grown as a person. Your book will definitely make the editor's desk and I will back this book until you succeed. Thank you for commenting on my book also. I look forward to more of your work, and hope that you book will be published :)

SusieGulick wrote 1154 days ago

Hi SuzieQ,

Four more days, then all that hard work will be rewarded. Editor's desk here you come!

John (Jnortonpa)



O, I love you, John. :) You made me laugh. :) I'm still smiling ear to ear. :) Yes, 3 day & 20 hours. :) I'm still not going to be presumptuous & kill myself keep on keeping on. :) If you read my updated profile page, I was sure I was going to die yesterday & got so sad I'd not live to Feb. 28 to see if I'd be chosen, but God was merciful & I'm still here & still symptoms, but not as bad :) - but God is my joy. :) PLUS JOHN :) - YOU'RE THE GREATEST. :) You're going to have a kazillion stars in your crown. :)

Love, Susie :)

jnortonpa wrote 1154 days ago

Hi SuzieQ,

Four more days, then all that hard work will be rewarded. Editor's desk here you come!

John (Jnortonpa)

Ham4you wrote 1154 days ago

I've only been through the first few chapters. WOW! My heart is aching! Abuse was not recognized back in the days. I can't wait to dive in and read more. This weekend I will be reading "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not." Thanks Susie Gullick for sharing this with us.

Melisa
"Twenty Weeks"

Constantine00 wrote 1154 days ago

Hello! I found your book and have begun reading it. I have placed it on my book shelf also

Sirius wrote 1154 days ago

I love the way Susie hits the reader straight between the eyes: Yes! I got raped! Was that the price of dinner? (Chp15). A story that might exhaust more delicate readers with its relentless energy and drama.

SusieGulick wrote 1155 days ago

Always good to see someone who can stay positive despite the many stumblingblocks in their past. Glad to see what you have overcome as it shows me the power of God. Stay Positive Susie!



Dear Benjamin,

I am so happy to hear from you & that you gold ******-rated, backed, & commented on my memoirs/testimony book :) - could you please keep my book on your bookshelf to help me, after my trying for almost a year to be chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk? :) I was #4 on 1-1-11 & 2 people passed me up, pushing me out to #6, so I didn't get chosen in the top 5 January 31 - I am now #1 & need lots of backings to hold me in so that I don't slide out again & so that I will be chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk February 28 which is 5 days from now. :) Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your help. :)

With pleasure, I gold ******-rated, read, & commented on your realistic antichrist story :) - just hope I'm not around for it. :) Totally timely because our Joyful Life Women's Bible study at Calvary Chapel Costa Mesa California is studying Revelation & also I've read the New Testament much more than 200 xs & get more each time. :)

It was so nice of you to take the time for me & to encourage me in the Lord & I have ever only been told that I was "special" once before in my life & that was about 30 years ago :) - I have always done my best & my boss told me one day, "you're special" & now you have. :) It makes it feel all worthwhile, even though I know my rewards are from the Lord. :) Anyway, you sure made my day, week, years, even!! :) Yes, with God's love & strength, I'm still going with my eye on Him to hold me up :) - I guess you've read my profile page. :)

Love, Susie :)
p.s. every ******-ing moves our books up authonomy's lists, as does backing more than 24 hours & the longer on our bookshelves, the more they move up, per authonomy's new rules :)

Solomon2010 wrote 1155 days ago

Always good to see someone who can stay positive despite the many stumblingblocks in their past. Glad to see what you have overcome as it shows me the power of God. Stay Positive Susie!

SusieGulick wrote 1156 days ago

Hi Susie, hope it doesn't seem to soon to say congrats!! So glad to see that you are accomplishing your goal. I had your book up all month and just recently took it down, as I feel you are now a shoe in to the ED. Prayers are still with you from my heart concerning all of your present trials. Continue to live, and not die!! God is able to perform all things through christ who strenghtens us....



Dear Danielle,

It is so nice of you to have kept my memoirs/testimony book on your bookshelf for so long. :) I need your backing more than ever to anchor me into the top 5 of the editor's desk so that I don't slide out again the way I did last month - I was #4 on 1-1-11 & 2 people passed me, pushing me out to #6, so I didn't get chosen January 31 - now I'm #1 & need lots of backing to hold me in so that I don't go out of the top 5 & so that I can be chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk February. :) It's crucial - Jim who got chosen last month, it happened to him in December & he finally got chosen. :) Please help me :) - it's only 5 more days. :) I would be ever so grateful. :)

Love, Susie :)

tree of life wrote 1156 days ago

Hi Susie, hope it doesn't seem to soon to say congrats!! So glad to see that you are accomplishing your goal. I had your book up all month and just recently took it down, as I feel you are now a shoe in to the ED. Prayers are still with you from my heart concerning all of your present trials. Continue to live, and not die!! God is able to perform all things through christ who strenghtens us....