Book Jacket

 

rank 1349
word count 125523
date submitted 29.04.2010
date updated 29.04.2010
genres: Young Adult
classification: moderate
complete

Lucas Lightning III

Michael Zyskind

A young boy gets in way over his head when he tries to pick up the lofty family mantle.

 

After the death of his renowned parents in a tragic accident, fifteen-year-old billionaire Lucas Lightning—third of his name—escapes to the family’s mountaintop estate in the mysterious Thunder Valley, where violent storms routinely clash with the stunning surroundings. There, he spends his days eating exquisite meals prepared by his private chef, lounging poolside by the backyard oasis, and hunting his best friend’s monstrous mechanical creations in the wooded area that encircles the property. Isolated from the world, Lucas is at peace.


But when Lucas stumbles upon an enigmatic boy during one of his hunts and an escalating storm, his picturesque life turns upside down. Lightning Manor is targeted by a brutal mercenary raid; the boy is taken and Lucas’s beloved guardian is put in a coma. Vowing vengeance, Lucas ventures into town to find those responsible.


Irrational, self-destructive, Lucas plunges into a pit of madness, all the while struggling—buckling—under the weight of a name that has become worldly synonymous with greatness.

 
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tags

action, adventure, family, friendship, greatness, lightning, madness, storm, thunder, wealth

on 18 watchlists

16 comments

 

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Jim Darcy wrote 1374 days ago

This is an unusual read but quickly involves the reader. Your dialogue works well and helps to define each character, as it should but often doesn't. Some original touches to intrigue the reader. I enjoyed what I read, thank you for sharing.
Jim Darcy
The Firelord's Crown

Barry Wenlock wrote 1436 days ago

Hi Michael, I thought this was a really great read -- exciting, enjoyable, tense and thought provoking. You have done a very good job with this and I backed you a while ago. Well done.
Best wishes, Barry

Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys

A Knight wrote 1440 days ago

You do a fantastic job with the underlying themes in this piece - making them evident without shoving them down the reader's throat. All this in your distinctive style makes this a wonderful, intelligent addition to the genre.

Backed with pleasure.
Abi xxx

Famlavan wrote 1447 days ago

I think how you have a number of underlying moral issues implanted in this amazing story is, very, very clever. This has a great pace for me never mind the market it has been written for.
You have a style that hints at things; it adds to this story so much, creates a type of ambiguity that hooks the reader into reading more. A clever and very well structured book. – Good luck

Kidd1 wrote 1448 days ago

This is a good story for kids who have it all, and don't realize how important their decisions are. One wrong step and they plunge into the abyss of decadance. Well written with a strong message. Backed.

I hope you will give mine a read, and back it if you like it.
Best,
Robert
Golden Conspiracy

missyfleming_22 wrote 1453 days ago

Wow, this doesn't let up one tiny bit! Such an exciting book and you've got such an excellent character in Lucas! This will appeal to such a wide variety, I see almost an entire franchise out of this! There is so much going on in your book it's impossible not to like it or want to read more. I enjoyed this so much, I'm coming back to read the other parts as a break from the madness of this site! Great, great job with this!

Missy
Mark of Eternity

Niobrara Kardnova wrote 1454 days ago

Hi Michael,
I read all through Part One. This is so rich with mystery and humor it doesn't slow down to let one breathe. The prologue is the most enticing I've yet to read on Authonomy, and then you don't stop. Is Lucas's intuitive dislike of the mayor and his wife justified? Is Cylus in league with them? What about the sexy Jordan? Can Albert Einstein unravel the mystery of Thunder Valley's geography? And will Jared be able to round up those pesky dolls before they cause mayhem? And , perhaps most important, who was this Tommy from the prologue, and how will he fit into the plot? You've hooked me but good, and I wouldn't change a word of what I've read so far. Awesome, really. Hope it gets published. Can't see why it wouldn't--it fits a big market.
Niobrara Kardnova (The Trouble with Wives)

carlashmore wrote 1454 days ago

Damn, this has all the ingredients for a fantastic YA adventure. I couldn;t fault your pitch, neither could I find anything structurally wrong with your prose. It seemed fluid, accessible and with just the right amount of descriptions to keep a YA readership happy. I liked this enormously.
Well done and backed.
carl
The Time hunters

D. L. Stroupe wrote 1454 days ago

You have a strong descriptive style and smooth writing. No wonder your numbers are climbing so fast. Backed. Good luck!!

lizjrnm wrote 1455 days ago

This is ayunique read for young adults - very imaginative and yet down to earth. I wish I was a billionaire at 15 - you have done a marvelous job with characterization. BACKED with pleasure.

Liz
The Cheech Room

eloraine wrote 1455 days ago

I love your descriptive skill, really good, backed with pleasure. E.Loraine Royal Blood Chronicles book one

PATRICK BARRETT wrote 1455 days ago

You are putting an incredible amount of pressure on a fifteen year old whether he is a billionaire or not. There will need to be some major adjustments to his personality because he will not have the personal skills of others. Superb imagination at work here and very visual. Paula Barrett (Cuthbert-how mean is my valley)

Melcom wrote 1455 days ago

This is a really good well thought out story that has been written with such fluidity. And what an amazing premise we have to look forward to, your target audience will appreciate this is full of adventure and of page-turning quality.

Very happily shelved
Melxx
Impeding Justice

soutexmex wrote 1455 days ago

Welcome aboard, Michael. This website will improve your writing craft, if you allow it. The short pitch is too generic. Put Lucas' name in the short pitch. With the long pitch, break it down into smaller paragraphs so it reads faster. End it with one succinct question. Perfecting your pitches is how you climb in ranking to gather more exposure and comments to better your novel. The writing is good so I am SHELVING you.

Though I have been a very active member for over a year, I can still use your comments on my book when you get the chance. Every little bit helps. Cheers!

JC
The Obergemau Key

SusieGulick wrote 1456 days ago

Dear Michael, I loved most of all, "....holding a ball of fire in his hand" - that was so far out! :) Before I began to read your book, I was prepared by your recap/pitch & prologue - very well done. Your epilogue was excellent. :) Your story is good because you create interest by having short paragraphs & lots of dialogue, which makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. I'm "commenting & backing" your book to help it move up the charts. Could you please return the favor by taking a moment to "comment & back" my TWO memoir books, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not" & the unedited version? "Tell Me True Love Stories," which tells at the end my illness now & 6th abusive marraiage." Thanks, Susie :)

Burgio wrote 1456 days ago

This is a good story. I like the way that Lucas hunts mechanical bears rather than the real thing; makes him a much better character for a young adult book than if he were a real hunter. The mark of this is the mysterious tone you've built into this from the very beginning; I think that will make it attract a wide audience. I know it kept me turning pages. I'm adding this to my shelf. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

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