The Contractor

Cant belive this has a red arrow, its such a good read. I thought it would whiz to the top.

Sue
One Foot in the Jungle/Knowing Liam Riley

I read the first chapter. A very intriguing read. I don't usually go for stories like this but I liked how you tied everything together. The way you introduced his job as an assassin--even though it was obvious from your premise--was very clever. I could see it coming because the presence of a tramp in a story like this would be ridiculous if it wasn't a plot device of some kind but I still enjoyed it. It helped get me interested in his double life.

Overall, very nice.

Roxanne Hunter

Very detailed, compelling story of a hitman and his bloody work. The rich descriptive prose had me thinking of Ian Fleming; the Bond stories always had this great descriptive flair, and that's your great strength here. The killings in the first part aren't lingered over, and the build-up is everthing. You also seem to know your tech, which is a major plus-point for these kind of thrillers, and the press-tripping journalist-cover is a masterstroke. Excellent work

P

Frank,

I started reading your Opus and thought I would give you my cent and half:

The first thing that jumps here is the style. Is a moment by moment perception where every moment is a dangling act promising the next to have the same urgency....

..... and that you deliver.

The jewel here is the pleasure you take in describing.

....each word an image, scene by scene creating a trace....

.... it sum plus accumulating into a landscape....

.... that installs itself in the reader's mind

Some Minor/Minorest/Minormost points:

Since you only posted 2 chapters I assume you are looking for tips to polish your prose rather than accolades

so let's get down to it:

"was just a little""been in control of the weather" "he wasn't the type" "registered shock" "slight twitching"
I would cut a bit on the qualifiers
why?
Because they call attention to the narrator.
They tell the reader: "there is narrator doing the telling here and he is kind of finicky"

"fondly referred" "bushy unkept gray" "expensive dark" "Breathing deeply"
I would also cut a bit on the modifiers
why?
because as Updike said: "the modern reader can fill in the blanks"

you are trying to build tension in your narrative,
tension is all about what you leave out rather than what you put in

Let me know if that helps,

Overall, wonderful

david

the basic story here is sound, and mostly well written but there is a real problem with style and timing. The opening needs to grip the reader and provide a hook to make them want to read on. Your opening is a bit flabby, thre is a lot of detail, much of it is not really necessary. eg the tramp's overcoat is described as shabby, stretched, too small, then a description of its history. This could be something like an undersize coat that had seen better days. This is an action thriller so shoudl be tightly written. Short, sharp sentences so the story moves fast as the plot. Not sure what an elderly man couple is. The shooting should be far more dramatic, to give contrast to the built up and aftermath. We do not need to know everythng that happens. tell us the important bits, show don't tell us things. If you tighten up the opening, try to wak through it in your head to get the timing, this will make it much better. Hope this helps.

Dear Frank
As said in my profile, I don't do the tit for tat thing. The very title makes me nervous, and the image of a gun doesn't improve the sense of disquiet. I did look at, tho and here goes.
It's a competent and confident opening, strong descriptions sense of place, but then you lose it a bit, all that killing, not for me. Technically, there are a few issues: blonde in men, is blond? Chap 2 too many poshes, and a lorrra, lorra blondes.
It's a blokes' book, most def. I haven't read much into it, afraid of what I may find, but can see you having a following. For the strength of pace and action, I've starred but not backed, Frank - that's the best I can do.

unable to load text. will try again.

Great start for a very taught thriller, would love to read more. If I had any criticism, which is tiny, I'd not have called the man who entered the road an 'old man'. He was referred to as a tramp continuously later so I'd say a tramp entered, that would be in keeping and not confuse the reader. It would also leave the man as scruffy, not old, which he wasn't anyway.
Worthy to be on my bookshelf

Keith

Frank - you have a compelling short and long pitch, and your story starts dramatically with the three killings. You have a good story-line, but somehow the pace does not match the plot. I'm no expert, but maybe some re-arrangement of the action would be in order, rather than using too many flash-backs?
Beware using too many adjectives in your colourful description of the old man, and although I appreciate they're not important, it might help the reader work out who is who if you gave names to the victims...
Sorry if I sound a bit negative, but you are worth bothering with, and I trust you will take this in the spirit with which it is offered. Here are some stars.
Jane.

I like your writing style and you pay great attention to detail. It takes a little while to identify with your characters. James seems distant. I don't really feel like I'm inside his head. His background and personality are interesting, though. You just need to bring it out more. The end of your first chapter could be a little sharper.

This is a good effort and I'm happy to back it.

Brian

I enjoyed this the first time I read it about 200 days ago. The following is a reprint of the comments I wrote the first time:

"Have Gun, Will Travel" was the name of an old TV series when I was a kid. Your story reminds me of it very much. "This was James McAuley - a hired assassin, a man who would kill another human being, if the price was right." His social life is pretty complicated, eh? I'll be back to read more once I get a little more time.

I've had the time and I must say that I like it even better more than ever. What an intriguing thriller.

If you read my bio page you will see that I acknowledge being a simple minded storyteller of a writer. I read your book, well, what you have of it here and I liked it very much. I see where many issues have been pointed out to you in regard to punctuation and structure below. I'm sure they are all accurate for the most part. I usually don;t comment on that stuff and stick to story.

In that regard, you have done well to entice mystery / thriller readers to like this tale. There is certainly plenty here to like. I did stumble just a wee bit in the first chapter on an item ot two but soon forgot anything about it.

Your use of dialogue seems realistic. I'm gonna step out there and say I thought your use of words quite crafty. Certainly thrifty. At very few points did I find myself saying, "I wish he would move on with this." For me, I remained "engaged" throughout.

I tend to use "underdog" characters a lot in my stories. While I wouldn't consider James an underdog per se in that context, he has been wronged, setting the tone for revenge, which is always sweet. Readers love this stuff. I do.

My suggestion would, if you aren't already busy doing it or have done it, is get to work polishing this manuscript. this thing is good enough to go all the way as it the kind of story they make movies out of pal. Had I wrote this story, I might even consider a professional editor (If you can afford it) to really make it shine in the sunlight.

I liked the premise of this the long pitch offeres a good tale and I was not dissapointed. You have done a good job in your characterisation. James is a highly believable character. The terriorist charge puts James in a unstable situation and I think you have laid the plans from that point to take the book forward well.

One for a long train journy or a wet Sunday I think.
Sue
Knowing Liam Riley.
I hope you enjoy it.

' The Contractor '

The characters and your use of realistic and believable dialogue makes this a solid read. The writing is powerful and descriptive and the reader is drawn in by a convincing imagination.

Jane
'Breath in the Dark '

How totally amazing you are, Frank!! :) Thank you so very much for again backing my memoirs/testimony book. :) May God richly bless you. :) Love, Susie :) p.s. I have also gold ******-rated your book :) - could you please gold ******-rated my book, too? :) Every ****** -ing & backing more than 24 hours moves our books up authonomy's lists. :) I want to ask you if you could please keep my book on your bookshelf because I'm #6 on the editor's desk & have to be in the top 5 to be chosen, the end of January :) - I had a mini-stroke Nov. 10 with slurred speech for an hour & numbness of tongue still & over 24 smaller ones where I couldn't speak since & I"d sure like to cross the finish line of the editor's desk after 322 days of trying on authonomy. :) Thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me :) - I have lost 3 sisters to strokes & my last sister, Mary had 2 heart attacks this past year.

Frank -

The Contractor - I know why I didn't leave a comment before, I was in a hurry and stumbled over the first paragraph. Taking the time now to read the two chapters up, I got into the story and the mind of your assassin. You write well, everything is there. Only in some places your sentences could be sculpted, and some commas are unecessary and hold up the flow. You seem to have every scene in your head, I like the detailed description and the dialogues work. I noticed the last update of your MS was in August 10. Your story is worth extra effort. I'm going to simplify one of your sentences as an example ... It was late afternoon when an old man entered the quiet suburban scene from a narrow side street ... one sentence, no commas. I think you get the drift. There are repetitions which one tends to overlook while writing ... greying shoulder length hair ... the word 'long' is superfluous here, or .... His shabby brown overcoat stretched tightly across his chest ... no need to add that it was too small. These are just a few examples how you can make this more elegant. Btw, the dreaded first paragraph could easily be integrated into the second. I like the start of the second para.
Mainly, I was drawn in and read the lot, so the story gripped and now I wonder what happens next. :) Rated well therefore. Best success, Pia

Hi Frank,

You have an exciting storyline here but you need to check your punctuation. You have quite a number of misplced commas.

Also the action needs to start a little sooner. You spend too much time setting the scene before anything happens. You do need to set the scene, but proceede thios with at least one line of action.

Ron

Hi Frank, hope you're doing well! Rebacking your wonderful work.

jim

Frank,

I just read the first chapter of THE CONTRACTOR. I think the action and imagery in the opening scene is excellent. Because you paint the picture so clearly, I can see the events unfolding moment by moment. That said, the chapter is not very strong from a structural standpoint. Many of your sentences are grammatically infirm and require edits with regard to punctuation. Perhaps the following web site will be helpful to you:

http://www.bartleby.com/141/strunk.html

Also, I agree with the comment below about the first two paragraphs. The background information about the season and the neighborhood accomplishes little and bogs the story down. In the middle of the third paragraph, you're missing the word "have" between "must" and "been".

Notwithstanding, you have an exciting premise here and a vivid imagination (at least I hope it's imagination!).

Best,

Rob
(Aralen Dreams)

Hiya Frank,

Not my usual genre but it is an interesting read and very well written. The second paragraph needs some editing in my opinion (I'm not really interested in the single parents who live in the flats on that street - this information doesn't move your story along at all) however, the description of the assassination and his get away was extremely well done - I enjoyed this and could really picture it.

Again the three paragraphs which start with 'He sat for a few minutest...' could also be drastically reduced. At this point I am only interested in the character and what happens next; a large part of these paragraphs distances me from him because they read like a manual on how to commit the perfect hit. (telling not showing.)

I also had a problem with the dialogue at the end of the chapter between him and Kirsty. It could have been terser and more dramatic. These are very long speeches with very long sentences which suggests a very unemotional, reasonable tone of voice, which is hardly appropriate considering what they are discussing. I think that it could be drastically cut - as could most of the last six paragraphs. Kirsty has now gone out of his life - we do not need her back story, she will not figure in the rest of the novel ( i assume.)

Despite all my comments, I think that this shows real promise, Frank and wish you all the best with it.

This is an interesting novel. Politics and its bad effects are disclosing before readers. The theme is not a mild one. It deserves contemporary importance, becasue politics in every country is maligned.

I read your first chapter.

General comments: A captivating start. A bold, daring and thoughtful main character. Good depth and detail. Your descriptions are effective.

Specific comments on chapter 1:
1) The all important first two paragraphs didn't engage me. The third paragraph did. Consider starting with it.
2) ' ... broad shouldered, blonde haired man ...' Blonde is for females. Blond is for males. There are more cases of this type of problem.
3) ' ... blood spurting from wounds above and below his left ear.' Despite how gun wounds are depicited in movies and on TV, in reality there is no immediate bleeding at the entry wound. The velocity of the bullet going in sucks all the blood, meat and bone into the body. The blood flows primarily from the much larger exit wound.
4) 'Too little, too late' is cliche.
5) You mention James coming down off the adrenaline rush, but you don't show the rush happening during the assassinations.
6) Consider reducing the number of exclamation marks by half. Overuse reduces their effectiveness.
7) I have to ask. Are ther surveillance cameras in the wealthy suburbs of Paris? I would think so. Yet, James doesn't mention dealing with them in his detailed recap of the mission.
8) ' ... an all weather sports pitch was playing host to a group of youngsters playing a football match.' You used 'playing' twice in the same sentence.
9) 'Please don't say anything James.' Comma after 'anything.' When you address someone in dialogue, offset their name or title with a comma.
10) 'He had avoided serious talk for so long, but Kirsty had forced the issue, something that could not be avoided any longer.' You used 'avoided' twice in this sentence.

I hope this critique helps you polish your all important first chapter. Thank you for backing "Savannah Passion." I hope "Savannah Passion" will remain on your shelf until it reaches the editor's desk.

Have a fabulous day.

This is a very engaging read. Contemporary theme which is still very relevant to today's homeland security situation. Impressive and engaging early chapters which draw the reader in. Backed.

Clive Radford
Unexpected Encounter

Hi again Frank. I'm very impressed by your first chapter. A lyrical and descriptive opening contrasts well against the sudden impact of the gunfire. Very good writing that has a sense of easiness about it, and I wish you all the best and hope it makes a real impression with many other readers here.

The Contractor, with the benefit of an enticing and ably crafted pitch, pulls us, from the comfort of the armchair, to share in the tribulations, activities and excitement experienced by the eponymous
Hero. The work opens with a classically smooth description of Paris in the Spring and this, paradoxically, causes the frisson of anticipation for the excitement to follow. And it does, believe!
Enthusiastically supported and BACKED. Robert Davidson. The Tuzla Run

Dear Cherry G
Many thanks for your analysis of the two chapters of my book. You certainly gave it a good going over. You nailed the anomaly that James McAuley displays, more than once and that is something Authonomy readers should spot. Thank you for being sharp enough and for pointing out the flaws. I will take due notice
and act on them.
Frank James (The Contractor)

Liked the opening with the deserted French street and then the sudden pulling of the gun and the killing of three people. Good start for a thriller: you've set the scene and got to the action straight away.Thought perhaps you tended to give too much detail (eg describing the victims' clothes, the car etc) which slowed things down a bit and stopped the urgency, but your portrayal of the professional and cold killer is well done. I had the feeling he was organised and ruthless, showing absolutely no remorse for what he had done (even killing the chaffeur with no hesitation.) In short, a very, very dangerous man..
Having shown the merciless side of him, perhaps you wanted to make James more atttractive by commenting on how he didn't want the daughters to see the shooting. I had my doubts about that display of compassion for the daughters. If he had felt so concerned about their feelings, he wouldn't be killing their father in the first place. They will still be traumatised, as will the family of the other two victims.
I had similar reaction in respect of his regret that he can't see his children play sports. He's just stopped a father from doing that forever. and doesn't seem aware of the irony! And just a technical point: I don't think people are allowed to take photos and videos of schoolchildren any more. Very sad, but I think that is a rule in most UK schools.
I'm sorry, I am sounding more negative than I feel. It is just that I'm concentrating on the things that niggled me. You succeed in making James more human with the argument with girlfriend on the phone. It reveals his life is not as well organised as his killings and he's not in total control. (Perhaps he kills to take control when he's unable to in his ordinary life?)
In chapter 2, it's a shock to meet the other version of himself, the man who writes for journals about holiday destinations, a divorced husband with an angry ex-wife and two children he doesn't see, his concern for the assassin trainer who has cancer, the problems with a girlfriend who wants a more commitment and now his attraction to the beautiful but mysterious Samantha. Complicated! Though in future chapters you're going to have to show me why I shouldn't want him caught. At the end of chapter 2, I'd feel a lot happier if he was stopped.
You've sown the seeds of suspicion about Samantha..she does seem too good to be true.. So is she going to be a threat to him in some way? Has someone hired her to assassinate him or has she her own agenda? After all, there may be a lot of people who want revenge on him, either because of the people he has killed or for his personal life.You made us want to find out more, so please load a few more chapters!
Just a few nits:
Chapter 1: In the paragraph that starts "The asssassin looked away along the street...." you have "elderly man couple" I'm thinking that "man" should be deleted.
Chapter 2: I found two cases of "Off course...." Should be "Of course."
Just a general observation which I think has been mentioned by a few previous reviewers, but I'd like to endorse it. I think you tend to put everything in, in one go. So the girlfriend lists everything she is taking with her and the new accounts manager is described in a list of great detail...I don't feel you need all of it.
But it's got the making of a fast paced thriler. BACKED.
Cherry G.
The Girl From Ithaca

Liked the opening with the deserted French street and then the sudden pulling of the gun and the killing of three people. Good start for a thriller: you've set the scene and got to the action straight away.Thought perhaps you tended to give too much detail (eg describing the victims' clothes, the car etc) which slowed things down a bit and stopped the urgency, but your portrayal of the professional and cold killer is well done. I had the feeling he was organised and ruthless, showing absolutely no remorse for what he had done (even killing the chaffeur with no hesitation.) In short, a very, very dangerous man..
Having shown the merciless side of him, perhaps you wanted to make James more atttractive by commenting on how he didn't want the daughters to see the shooting. I had my doubts about that display of compassion for the daughters. If he had felt so concerned about their feelings, he wouldn't be killing their father in the first place. They will still be traumatised, as will the family of the other two victims.
I had similar reaction in respect of his regret that he can't see his children play sports. He's just stopped a father from doing that forever. and doesn't seem aware of the irony! And just a technical point: I don't think people are allowed to take photos and videos of schoolchildren any more. Very sad, but I think that is a rule in most UK schools.
I'm sorry, I am sounding more negative than I feel. It is just that I'm concentrating on the things that niggled me. You succeed in making James more human with the argument with girlfriend on the phone. It reveals his life is not as well organised as his killings and he's not in total control. (Perhaps he kills to take control when he's unable to in his ordinary life?)
In chapter 2, it's a shock to meet the other version of himself, the man who writes for journals about holiday destinations, a divorced husband with an angry ex-wife and two children he doesn't see, his concern for the assassin trainer who has cancer, the problems with a girlfriend who wants a more commitment and now his attraction to the beautiful but mysterious Samantha. Complicated! Though in future chapters you're going to have to show me why I shouldn't want him caught. At the end of chapter 2, I'd feel a lot happier if he was stopped.
You've sown the seeds of suspicion about Samantha..she does seem too good to be true.. So is she going to be a threat to him in some way? Has someone hired her to assassinate him or has she her own agenda? After all, there may be a lot of people who want revenge on him, either because of the people he has killed or for his personal life.You made us want to find out more, so please load a few more chapters!
Just a few nits:
Chapter 1: In the paragraph that starts "The asssassin looked away along the street...." you have "elderly man couple" I'm thinking that "man" should be deleted.
Chapter 2: I found two cases of "Off course...." Should be "Of course."
Just a general observation which I think has been mentioned by a few previous reviewers, but I'd like to endorse it. I think you tend to put everything in, in one go. So the girlfriend lists everything she is taking with her and the new accounts manager is described in a list of great detail...I don't feel you need all of it.
But it's got the making of a fast paced thriler. BACKED.
Cherry G.
The Girl From Ithaca

Eloquent, interesting and well constructed narrative. I agree with the comments already posted and equally sure that this has the makings of an excellent thriller. Backed.
Laurence Winchester,
The Cross of Goa

Hi Frank. I think you have the makings of a good thriller here. I liked the gentle description of the quiet streets of springtime Paris and the contrast as the sudden act of violence is played out..However the impact was to a large extent lost in the extensive and detailed description of the politician's entourage. These characters are too fleeting to go into what colour ties they are wearing etc. We know what a chauffeur wears and the bodyguard could simply be 'also well dressed. Measuring the distances - 7 metres - 3 metres also slows the pace. You may want to do something about the echo of the word 'people' in the second paragraph.
After the action the getaway is also over described i think and this is followed by rather contrived introduction of characters and info dumps of back story that has little bearing on the plot at this stage and should be brought in as and when there is a need to know or a clear opportunity presents itself.
When the girfriend phones to give him the push would she list the things she is taking? sure she would just say 'I am clearing out my stuff' or something like that. You have a tendency to tell rather than show and overwrite a bit, it might be a good idea to have another look at this as it is difficult to correct in an edit. If you find at the end of the first draft that you are into 150000 words before you reach the denouement the cutting will be painful.
This may sound rather negative but I am offering these comments because I think this has great potential.
For the same reason I am backing it.
I wish you good luck with your book.
John G (The Last Olympiad)
This

Frank, this is a very assured opening. You've created a distinctive narrative voice.. Pacy and with good attention detail - a staple of all the best thrillers. I quite like the way you've punctuated this - but if more reviewers comment otherwise, perhaps it's something you should look at - the odd, shot-sharp sentence can sometimes be extra effective. Happy to give you my backing.

Regards

NA 'A Red Sky in Morning' & 'Tales of Ordinary Sadness'

A great beginning to what I'm sure will be a great book, but I believe the opening was perhaps a little too dry. Your use of punctuation is also praiseworthy, however is it just possible that some of the sentences could do with being broken down?

Good luck,
Dagura :)

Very enjoyable, fine writing style. Hope you'll upload more chapters soon. Backed, of course.
Best wishes,
M


- Weekend Chimney Sweep of Happy New Year
- Sarajevo Walls of Fate

The contractor
Intriguing pitch, and a good opening
Eveleen
(Turning a new leaf)

I love a good edge of the seat thriller and this is one I would love to read and not put down until the end. Backed with absolute pleasure. Lynne, Brooklyn Bridge.

Very good. Though crime novels have never been my thing, I can see a lot of thought and care has gone into this. Good luck with this.
Backed.

Frank,

Your writing is compelling and from the outset makes a reader want to find a quiet place to read on, and on, and on. I am particularly impressed with the narrative in your first chapter which precedes the first piece of dialogue. THAT’S talent!

My only nit is the tense(s) in which your full pitch is written. Pitches for a novel should always be written in the present tense. Yours is written in the past and present tense.

This nit aside, I’m happy to back you.

Rodney Battles

Excellent writing, and the detail of the cool professional killing was superbly done. I think I would have liked James a little more if he didn't kill for money, though I'm perfectly happy to see him kill in justified revenge. My other criticism is that there is too little loaded, - only two chapters. I saw no errors of grammar or spelling.
A very good, professional novel. Well done. Backed, Marj.

Hi Frank - blurb shows this is really my cuppa - Love the writing. Backed with enthusiasm

Thanks for your kind backing Frank so very kind. Enjoyed your first chapter immensely and found it an easy read.

Best wishes

richard

Hi Frank

Thanks for the positive feedback you left about my work. I always try to return the favour so I just read some of your book. I always try to give honest feedback, so I have included the following suggestions, all of which have been made to me in the past, and I found they improved my writing.

Your opening chapter starts well, with immediate action and an introduction to an obviously highly trained killer. The second chapter, however, doesn’t seem to set the scene for where the rest of the story is going, so it is difficult to comment on this. I wonder whether it might be better to reduce the amount of conversation between James and Samantha, and concentrate instead on setting up the direction of your story instead.

You also introduce a few characters in the first chapter without telling us who they are (Jenny and Sarah).
I think you could improve the realism of your writing by taking the reader right inside the assassin’s point of view. You could do this by giving him a distinctive ‘voice’ (by this, I mean use the words he would use, and give him his own speech patterns). Would a hardened killer say that a road had ‘pothole-itis’?

Also, while you obviously speak French, I doubt all of your readers do, so if you are going to use sentences in another language, you must somehow explain what they mean, or you will leave people confused.
I doubt he would sit in the car for any longer than he had to, as inevitably the bodies would be discovered before long, and the person who found them might even have walked past him sitting in the car to get there.

Have you written any more than the two chapters posted here? It would be interesting to know where you take the rest of the story, as what you have uploaded so far concentrates as much on James’ relationship with Samantha as it does on the hunter-becomes-the-hunted part of your synopsis.

Anyway, I realise this could all sound pretty critical, but you are, of course, welcome to disagree with and ignore everything I’ve said. We’re all learning constantly, though, and those of us who stick at it long enough will hopefully get good enough to get something published. All the best.

Alastair Gunn
The Nemesis Countdown

Brilliant start here, with excellent detail behnind the chilling assassinations. It would be worth an edit to get rid of any small errors - I have only found one, and that is in the second sentence where you should really have a full stop after "different." Otherwise this is very accomplished. Backed. Colin

Hi Frank. I've read the first chapter of The Contractor. It's an exciting start & introduces us to James McAuley. Seems pretty good to me. Happily backed.

Frank, I've just been involved with this for about 20 hours. Still learning. I read the first chapter. Put it aside and read it again. My guess is that you might decide to speed it up a bit. Lots of good detail...I'll come back and read more. I'm interested.

Dave Brummett

Hello Frank,
I enjoyed this; I think it has great prospects. The action scenes are well paced and capture the reader’s interest well. However, I do wonder whether some of the prose could perhaps be a little smoother, and maybe more succinct? However, I am unpublished, so you don’t really need to pay too much attention to my ramblings. Also, a small point, but is there a typo near the beginning .’elderly man couple …’?
Anyway, I am more than happy to back this on the basis of the considerable potential it displays.
Rheagan Greene – Unwelcome Reflections

Frank, the contractor is a very cetred and well written story. it is enjoyable and very easy to connect with the killer. I enjoyed reading, and I suppose that is all what you need to know from me.
shah

I enjoyed your writing style, great pitch and detail. Very good imagery that you conjure up. Backed with pleasure. Eunice.

Good pitch and a stunning assaination scene well played out enough to keep the reader gripped
Gingernut

A well written thriller you take us straight into the action as he assonates the two guys and makes a clean get away. Your writing style is clean and strong you don’t take ages setting a scene with endless props. You set it after the event. The couple walking away, the lady scrubbing the steps, we have a complete view of everything in a snapshot. I read two chapters and could not find fault with this its very professionally executed.

Regards Wilma1
Knowing Liam Riley – please take a moment to take a look.

The Contractor
One thing I love about this book is your attention to detail which means also that you've thoroughly research your subject. That to me is the mark of a good writer. I really enjoyed this. Backed with pleasure. Sana x

Really impressive. It reminds me of Mr and Mrs Smith. i really enjoyed reading the hook of your book, However, I do think it needs a bit tweaking. Your writing is clear and creative. Well done.

BACKED
Kelvin
ICIRE: The Rebirth