The Cigar Seed

Wow! Briliant and engaging.
Solid theme and plot and one that will attract a crowd.

Welll done

best
The Mind Setter

Thanks for reading. Yes, I'm aware of heavyiness in backstory, so may revise when more comments received. Will test market as an eBook then see what happens. Skimmed your first chapters - will come back after mid October as I have to read the 6 shortlisted Man Booker novels as a reader for the UK Library Service. From what I read it certainly pepped me up! I suspect deeper undercurrents will swirl on a second reading. The only thing is - it seems a little short for the traditional publishing route - I believe an ideal length of between 90,000 and 130,000 words is required for a newbie.

Paul,

First chapter starts and ends with drama. But then there's quite a lot of back story in the middle, and you nearly lost me.

The second chapter though moves quickly, with tension constantly building.

Happy to give this a spin on the shelf.

Paul,

First chapter starts and ends with drama. But then there's quite a lot of back story in the middle, and you nearly lost me.

The second chapter though moves quickly, with tension constantly building.

Happy to give this a spin on the shelf.

Thoroughly intriguing with all the hallmarks of a succesful thriller, well done. Paula Barrett (Cuthbert-how mean is my valley)

Good story in the making here. We don't know much about ETA except for the occasional news bulletin so you have a unique selling point here. :)

Hi Paul

I think the basic premise works well, and personally I found having the story based around ETA more interesting. Makes a change from the Russians, some eastern European country ending in '...istan', Al Queda or the Mafia!

I found the scene of Terese arriving at the airport quite tense, and looking back, I wonder whether this would work better as the opening of the novel. Chapter 1 offers quite a lot of back story. It's not until you get towards the end of that that we really find out what the novel is going to be about.

Good luck with it!

good diague shines here, showing your skill as a writer- on my watchlist...
read SEASONS....

The cigar seed
Interesting pitch, and a good opening
Backed
Eveleen
(Turning a new leaf)

Dear Paul, I love that I'm not Terese :) - what has she gotten herself into? :) Your pitch beckoned me to read & now it's on Fidel, so will be a while for me to see what will happen next, am left hanging in the air. :) Great write! :) Intriguing & suspenseful with tight dialogue & paragraphs. :) I've backed your book :) - could you please take a moment to back my memoir book? :) Thank you so very much. :) Love, Susie :)

This is information from authonomy (so beware of any other untrue information you may receive that is spam & not quotes of authonomy):
"When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved"
"Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs."

All of the necessary inclusions for an excellent thriller. A little dialogue heavy to begin but perhaps that is necessary in a text that will ultimately be powered by human interaction and conflict which this obviously is. You have the skill and talent to carry this off well and you are proving yourself worthy of the compliment.

BACKED

Dear Paul


just love your short pitch which really encouraged me to read on. your long pitch sold me your book. I have not read it all and certainly cannot comment with regard punctuation and grammar , i would not presume. but I know what I enjoy and I did your book so far. Over time I will carry on reading for sure. I will say that I like the feel that I am sitting with you and you are telling me the story, we all like that.

Please take a moment to look, COMMENT which is

important to me, and BACK my book. if not that is OK
also

The VERY best of luck to you

BACKED BY ME FOR SURE.
Denise
The Letter

:) comment to follow - read & comment on 7 hours later :)

Exciting, topical (ETA in the news 6th Sept with the offer of a ceasefire) - a bit too much talking for a thriller I should have thought. Lots of exotic colour and what looks like a lot of research has gone into the story. I do think, however, that it gets bogged down in back-story. Couple of carps:
Would an undercover ETA agent arrive in Cuba wearing camouflage trousers?
You wouldn't get a first class honours at the Sorbonne, it would be a Licence or a Maitrise (had to look that up!)
Surely you wouldn't overhear a murder plot being casually discussed in a hotel lobby?
No car chase yet? :)

Gripping. The tension forcing you to read on. Teresa getting off the plane is heart-in-the-mouth stuff. Something we've all done many times and yet here, it's riveting. I do think the sweat trickled down Terese's cleavage, though, rather than her ribs.
When you introduce Peru in the prologue you have two adjectives to almost every noun. A narrow white scar; airless azure sky; twisted oak tree; dark green foliage, even greyish smoke and leafy shade are too much. We know that scars are white,sky blue, oak is a tree and leaves are green.
I liked 'choking imperialist yoke' though, it rings true of the rhetoric of my student years. I look forward to reading more of this. Sylvia.