Book Jacket

 

rank 51
word count 53322
date submitted 11.12.2010
date updated 24.01.2013
genres: Non-fiction, Biography, Harper True...
classification: moderate
incomplete

Stolen Childhood

Laila Bevan

I was eight years old, about to commit suicide, I had lost all hope. I was not afraid of dying. I was afraid of living.

 

I put on my light blue coat, one that my mother had sewn for me, and walked out of the house and down the road about 150 meters from the farm. It was very cold and it was snowing heavily. There was about six feet of snow on each side of the road and I found a spot and just sat down like a little bundle in the middle of the road, with my fingers in my ears and my eyes tightly shut waiting for a car to hit me. The visibility in this blizzard was around six feet.
I was eight years old and about to commit suicide. I had lost all hope and I saw no future. I knew it would not be long before it would all be over, no more beatings, no more pain, I would finally escape. This road had a lot of traffic and all I had to do now was to sit and wait, and as I sat there all I could feel was numbness, I had no fear. I was not afraid of dying. I was afraid of living.

 
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, a true gripping story, abuse, adultery, alcohol, autobiography, christian, cold, compelling, death, depression, despair, divorce, domestic violence,...

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Chapters

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Chapter 14

Glints of Light

 

About once a week Mum and Dad went shopping. The nearest shop was 12 km away. I always nagged, begged, and pleaded to go with them but very rarely was I allowed to go. They used to sneak off.  I wouldn’t know they were gone or where they were, until they came home with loads of shopping bags. On occasion I remember going outside the house, only to see Mum and Dad hurrying into the car, slamming the car doors, and driving off down the road, with me running after the car shouting, “Wait for me, wait for me, I want to come.” I would see Ted’s head in the back window, poking his tongue out at me and giving me his devilish look. Hours later when they came back, Ted would boast about all the chocolate he had been given and ice-cream too, and then he would say, “I get everything, you get nothing because you are the whore child and not worth a shit. I am so glad you get nothing because I hate you.”   

On the few occasions I was allowed to go with Mum shopping, Mum would stop for a coffee at the local bakery. Mum never ate much and would just have coffee with cream on the side. With all the lovely smells coming from the bakery I would beg her to buy me a Danish pastry. She always absolutely refused and would say, “Here’s some cream left over from my coffee, drink that.” I would catch a glimpse of the face of the woman who was running the bakery, going from a big smile, to a face of pity. At one time I heard her say to Mum, “Look, I do have some lovely pastries from yesterday, there are at least 10 of them in the bag.  I normally sell each pastry for 3 Krone (30 pence), but I can let you have the whole bag for only 5 Krone (50 pence). Don’t tell anyone I sold them to you so cheaply, but then your kid can have a taste.” Mum said a firm no thanks, quickly drank her coffee and we left the shop.  

The strangest thing though, is that when I was allowed to go shopping with Dad, and those occasions were few and far between, it was totally different.  Dad would go to the petrol station to fill up with petrol and have a chat with his mate who ran the station. I had to wait a long time before he was ready to go home. In those days the petrol stations were like garages where they also fixed cars. They were not grocery stores like today, the only extra they had in the petrol stations were bottles of pop and ice creams.

     I remember asking Dad in the nicest way I could, if I could please have an ice cream. I was allowed to choose the ice cream I wanted. In those brief moments, when Dad bought me an ice cream, I felt like I had a dad! Enjoying my ice cream, I felt very good and happy, not just because the taste of the ice cream was wonderful, but the fact that it was Dad himself who had bought it for me, and I didn’t have to nag to get it. I believe Dad must have wanted me to have it! A warm feeling flowed through my whole body and I held on to those few moments as if they were precious gold.  Receiving any kind of affection from my Dad was so rare, I have never forgotten them. When Dad was sober he never treated me bad in any way, by calling me names or wanting to throw me out. He was far more generous than Mum, and I was never afraid of him when he didn’t drink. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapters

14

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Andrea Taylor wrote 166 days ago

I've only read the first part and I have to say I was quickly hooked. There are a lot of autobiographies on here but this is one of the best. It's telling a story with enough distance to provoke curiosity and horror ( some are too 'I' this and 'I' that, yours does not fall into that trap). The start is appallingly readable, and makes us want to know what happens next.
Very good story and well written
Andrea
The de Amerley Affair

CATHERINE SHAW wrote 173 days ago

What a tragic story Laila. I try to forgive my mother, but she had the perfect upbringing and was just spoiled and still is. However, your mother must have been very damaged herself, very sad! I look forward to reading more and hope it has a happy ending.

On my watch list and will be on my shelf next shuffle

Cathy

Jerianne wrote 14 days ago

Laila,

Thank you for writing your story for the world to see. I have read 4 chapters and want to read more. I am sorry for the life you have been given... It is late. I will come back to read how you came back to Christ. It must be painful to relive such an experience, but it will benefit others who have gone through much less to find freedom in Christ!

Jeri

Lyn4ny wrote 74 days ago

Lalia,

I have only read chapter one but will be back soon to see where this is going. Excellently written and hooks the reader immediately. It has a great flow to it and i'm sure it will do well. High Stars from me! Thanks for sharing such a tragic story here.

-Lyn
Forty-Four Footprints Following Me

Grace Lyssett wrote 111 days ago

Oh my goodness Laila, your poor Tally! I know how terrible it can be to have a beloved pet taken from you so callously. My heart ached for you.



Longing for a normal family, a loving mother, a dad who cared, when all they do is abuse and hurt us, is something that many people find hard to understand. We find all kinds of tactics to cover up the abuse and appear normal to the outside world. I was right there with you. My own reaction as an abused child lacked anger though. I admire how you dealt with the abuse you suffered and lashed out. At least, by not storing it up inside you, it will not cause health problems later in life.



Lack of sleep has been my bug bear too. Nightmares and restlessness a constant drain on energy. I can’t imagine how terrible it was to bang your head to feel dizzy in order to escape into your own world. You poor poor little girl. And having to sleep in that small, wet, mouldy cot for so many years? It is shocking beyond words.



Being trapped, desperate to run away, with nowhere to go, being constantly threatened and unable to relax; oh Laila, I am right there with you.



Hitchhiking around Norway in the 1970s - we might have met! I went to Bergen and around the fjords but was mostly around Oslo, having hitched there from England 3-4 times each year.



Then you described the rape, how you froze, and felt that it was all your fault. ‘something very real was taken from me in that moment, I had no ownership over my body and longer. It had been taken from me and I felt like I was in a bubble, cut off from the rest of the world, numb.’



I identified with every word and you described it so well.



This is a compelling yet horrific story. It ended abruptly though. Your classification says it is incomplete. I wonder what happened to you between being a rebellious teenager and a happy adult.



I also have to say that having been opened up by your honest and raw account of a terrible childhood it was a shock to be preached at so suddenly and harshly by your declaration of God. To go from a desperately empty young teenager, feeling that God had failed her, and being totally against Bible studies, to actually quoting from it, alienated me from you. I felt cheated. What happened to get you to there? Please explain by filling in the gaps. It was sadly a very disappointing close to a heart-rending story.



PS I have just discovered that I’ve been posting my comments as messages and so I am sending them again to the correct place!



With Love 
Grace

Dr. Surya Kumar Daimari wrote 112 days ago

Hi Laila, Whenever I come across a good book , I strongly feel that I should make a ready comment on it as a part of my Christian duty. Your “Stolen Childhood” is really a wonderful book with a strong message to the world. You have a story to tell everybody , a story of a harper true life, a real story of your own with a great message of hope, love and forgiveness. The book has appealed to me and I believe, will appeal to millions. Few months back , one of my nieces, a young girl of 20, chose a horrible way to finish herself . A precious life is lost in a twinkling of an eye.. We were struck-dumb, parents totally broke down in terrible grief. Why did she finish herself? What made her life so embarrassing, so miserable and so hopeless? We didn’t have an answer. Unlike yours, she had a good career, money and wealth, indeed a good parents and a good Christian home. But why did she choose the most horrible way? This dangerous mania of suicide has been ever increasing in this world today particularly among the teenagers.
Can’t say how many teenagers’ lives have been marred half way. The question is ‘why’? Your book must have an answer.
There was a girl of 15 trying to find out a poison intending to finish her life, found out a bottle with a label on it written, ”Poison” in red ink. She immediately opened the cap and swallowed up the whole liquid in it. She waited for a minute , then hours for reaction to take place, but nothing happened. She did not die. Somebody had put in it honey instead of poison knowingly or unknowingly. Any way, that what looked poison turned out to be honey which saved a precious life. Your life story seemed to be a poison but came out to be honey---a blessing to millions. All the sorrows, heartache and tragedies of life---may be God’s ways to someone He loves dearly to lead him or her to a blessed life—full of love and forgiveness, joy and peace, hope and longsuffering----and become a channel of blessing.
The way you write the story is indeed simple and very natural, pleasing to the eye, ear and the heart as well. And that’s the quality of a good literature. Highest stars.
Wish you all the best,
Surya,
The Names of the Believers in the Bible.

Celine Zabel wrote 117 days ago

Laila,

I have read through chapter 6. Unbelievable story and great writing about the depths of this horror. When I read about the destruction of children, I feel the weight of all that is bad in humanity. I do not believe in the "resiliency" of children. I believe that all of this damage leaks out--in all sorts of additionally damaging ways.

Just a few nits: end of chapter 5, defence s/b defense. The two foetal words could be "fetal".

Congratulations on a story perfectly executed.

The best to you Laila.

Celine Zabel
Lives Shattered: One Mother's Loss at the Hands of the Legal System

Elizabeth Kathleen wrote 117 days ago

Laila, how much can I say about this book, your life and the lighthouse you are being at the end of the book by shining the wonderful light of Jesus Christ to all who, like your precious self, are being tossed to and fro on unsafe waters. Your story reminds me of Lois Beougher, a dear woman we knew who suffered horrible abuse in her childhood, but used it to God's glory until Jesus took her home.
May God bless you and your book! I'm pleased to give it shelf space!
Elizabeth
"If Children are Cheaper by the Dozen, Can I Get a Discount on Six?"

Grace Lyssett wrote 133 days ago

Loving this book, Laila. I'm only on chapter 3 and am carried along by your easy writing style. I feel the impending doom and want to know what happens to you, poor little girl.

I have a deep love of Norway, the nature and the people. If you read my book you will understand why and perhaps we might have a connection with each other. I too was abused.

I am very impressed with how well you write in your second language. I will comment again when I have finished reading. I rate it highly so far.

With Love,
Grace Lyssett
SORRY


Helen Laycock wrote 137 days ago

Laila,
I've been waiting for some free time to read your book. This evening I began. My intention was to read a few chapters to begin with and then, later, to come back for more. However, once I began reading, I couldn't find a place to stop! I just had to keep going to the very end.

Your story is told so eloquently - and in a second language too. It pulled me through effortlessly and moved me enormously. Your strength is amazing. I forgot that I was reading a story, or even that I was on this site. I am so glad that you found a positive focus to your life.

Thank you for sharing this. I hope that it has been cathartic and I hope, too, that your book will enjoy great success.

Helen
Glass Dreams

Seringapatam wrote 147 days ago

A really good flowing story. I like the premise behind the story and the way you transfer that to the reader. I will be scoring this high.
Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R)

Helen Laycock wrote 160 days ago

Laila, this is a compelling pitch. I have added your book to my watchlist and very much look forward to reading it.

Helen
Glass Dreams

carol jefferies wrote 165 days ago

Hi Laila,

I've just read the first nine gripping chapters of your book, 'Stolen Childhood.' It makes compelling and easy reading.

When I read your pitch it did make me wonder what you had experienced as a child to want to end your life at the age of eight, but nothing could have prepared me with your horrific story.

It was reassuring that you wrote that you had since healed but those scars opened up again she you committed pen to paper to share your experiences.

You give a good insight into the isolation of rural living in Norway, and how hard a life it was during your childhood for parents to provide a living.

I am so glad that you found some affection and security with your grandparents, and I am sure it is that which has helped you through your trauma. Although you must have been devastated when they left, I am glad that they did return for visits.

I shall have to read on to find out what Ted develops into, and to see anyone eventually does stop his violence towards you.

Well done. This is definitely one for me to back.

Carol Jefferies
(A Prince Unboyed)

Andrea Taylor wrote 166 days ago

I've only read the first part and I have to say I was quickly hooked. There are a lot of autobiographies on here but this is one of the best. It's telling a story with enough distance to provoke curiosity and horror ( some are too 'I' this and 'I' that, yours does not fall into that trap). The start is appallingly readable, and makes us want to know what happens next.
Very good story and well written
Andrea
The de Amerley Affair

CATHERINE SHAW wrote 167 days ago

Oh my goodness this is so powerful. If you read my chapter 35 it is so similar, so much so I am now quite tearful. Reading your story was like reading my own daughter's story; she actually wrote chapter 35 herself. Luckily she was never hurt or witnessed any of her dad's violence towards so, so at least she was spared that. But she tried so hard to protect me and I didn't realise this until I read her story. I am so moved that my son has just asked what is the matter with me :) I am now hooked and have to read the lot. Your book is fantastic and will remain on my shelf for a long time, I can assure you. xx

Keith Gilbey wrote 167 days ago

Laila,

What a touching and real book. It is amazing what we go through and how we survive. High stars for now.

You might find some comfort in my book Peppermint.

Keith

CATHERINE SHAW wrote 173 days ago

What a tragic story Laila. I try to forgive my mother, but she had the perfect upbringing and was just spoiled and still is. However, your mother must have been very damaged herself, very sad! I look forward to reading more and hope it has a happy ending.

On my watch list and will be on my shelf next shuffle

Cathy

evermoore wrote 173 days ago

Laila...Your book was so painful for me to read. I wanted to scoop you up and run with the child you were and just keep you safe. I'm so very happy that your life is now filled with the peace that only our sweet Savior can give. I know that from your stolen childhood, you've given all that read your book the chance to gain a new life for themselves. I know this will be published...and I know God is so pleased that you're helping us all find our way to His light.
(Hugs) Linda
Daniel Simmons Journey
and
Children Walking with Jesus

Charles Knightley wrote 209 days ago

Compelling story and a vivid account, I didn’t want to stop reading it. You can tell that the writer’s native language is not English. Sometimes this distracted from the reading.

Smokeybehr wrote 216 days ago

Laila:

Thank you for sharing your story. God works in so many mysterious ways, that we often question, why Lord? why me? The answer for you comes in your book. Why you? You had to have endured and survived, Found God, and lived to tell your story, for His Glory. All God's children are special to Him. Each and every one of us, is special.
I saw only minor problems with your English Language written word, things easily corrected. Your story comes through loud and clear!

Perhaps you might enjoy my book, Beyond the Eyes of Princess Ladina. It is also a wonderful story of eliminating evil in the world. I would appreciate if you read/rated/commented on it.

Thanks so much again for sharing your story... Many stars and a place on my bookshelf for this well written story. May God Guide you through the Storm!

Gary Roy: Beyond the Eyes of Princess Ladina

Abby Vandiver wrote 217 days ago

This is an interesting story. It shows physical abuse by the brother in the Chapters that I read, but mental abuse by many other family members. Thank goodness for her maternal grandparents. You also do a good job of writing this in English. Only read a few chapters but found it engaging and enjoyable.

Abby

Catarina A wrote 217 days ago

Dear Laila,
Your pitch was so compelling, i had to take the time and read some chapters. You, my dear, are a poster child for the Glory of God and His constant presence in our lives. Child abuse is the most horrible act in our society and yet, it happens everyday to helpless children. God bless you.
High stars and on my shelf.
Catarina

Labradors and cappuccino wrote 236 days ago

I have read 5 chapters of your compelling book and I find it very well written. Your English and punctuation are better than many others I've read. I'm glad you wrote your story. That was very brave of you and the right thing to do. I hope it gets published.Well done. I'm backing you and high stars.
Debbie Richardson
Holy Spirit Nudges/Pick 'n' Mix Mums

Skip Mahaffey wrote 241 days ago

I'm stunned that this story has not reached the top 20 yet. It is so well told and unbelievably compelling. It will stay on my bookshelf until it reaches its worthy place.

Keith Gilbey wrote 251 days ago

Laila,

I wonder if my simple book will offer you anything. Happy to read in return.

Keith Gilbey
Peppermint

KMac23 wrote 252 days ago

Laila, I read four of your chapters and think this story is riveting! I think that you are a strong person to have endured what you did and survived. It is nothing a child should ever have to go through and was so sad to hear. I don't ever understand why a father or mother out on an innocent child. And throughout, you didn't understand any of what was happening and why. I am glad you found faith in God, and he brought you to a place of peace, and it really is a testimony to what He can do, as without him you might have been bitter and filled with anger yourself. You really have a talent for writing, as what I read was very clean and polished and the story told very realistically. I didn't see issues with the English language, and felt this was not a problem. I believe that this is a story that needs to be told for others to help understand healing. I hope you are published, and that you do well on the site. Best wishes!

Kara
A Gate Called Beautiful

Geddy25 wrote 294 days ago

This must have been a very difficult book to write. It is very well written and you make appropriate links within the text that help the reader follow your experiences. What is most striking is that you do not ask for sympathy through your writting but at the same time you clearly convey the anguish and damage that child abuse causes.

I wish you luck with this book.

Mike
(Rudolf Goes Bananas & Way Back to Devil's Mountain).

Andrew Esposito wrote 310 days ago

Stolen Children is a harrowing story. The first chapter i immediately engaging as the torrid abuse from the author's brother is described. With the victim being only eight years old, I really sympathised with helplessness of the situation - grandparents away and no adults to intervene. What becomes clear is the inner strength of the victim. It is a sorrowful to think that suicide at a such a tender age became a real option as dying was less scary than living. Laila, your decision to share your story is very brave. I'm sure other readers who have been through the same ordeal will dervie strength from your story. Rated with high stars. Best regards, Andrew Esposito / Killing Paradise

Juniper1 wrote 315 days ago

Laila,
Your story is incredibly moving. I also watched your interview which i found very inspirational. God bless you for your courage.
Pats

Lyn Ventura wrote 323 days ago

Dear Laila,

Yours is a difficult book to read as it resonates so much with my own childhood. Especially the part about your calling out to Jesus. I didn't know who Jesus was..I didn't even know who God was, but I too remember calling out to Him at the age of 5 for help. I am so broken for your childhood, but so encouraged by your faith. God says He gives us "beauty for ashes" and in the case of this book, He truly has. God bless you.

Many Blessings,
Lyn Ventura
With All My Mind

RaineyC wrote 345 days ago

I found this hard to read because I find child abuse so abhorrent, but you told your story so well that I felt compelled to keep reading. You mentioned a fear that you might not be able to write it well and concern that your English might not be adequate. Both concerns were unfounded. Your writing was clear and easy to understand. You talked of the pain of reliving your nightmare. I can relate to that, having written a book about my husband's childhood trauma and seen him go through similar trials as supressed memories surfaced. Ultimately, though, it was a healing experience for him and I hope it has been for you. You survived it. You can be proud of that and proud that you were strong enough to grow through it and not let it destroy you. Your story proves that happiness is a state of mind based on faith. Those who suffer hardship and pain often achieve greater happiness, perhaps because they are compelled to build faith to survive, and because they develop a deep appreciation for the simple pleasures of life that others take for granted - like peace and safety.
Congratulations on writing this so well, and thankyou for sharing your story.
RaineyC
The Pencil Case

patio wrote 372 days ago

I stopped by to give maximum stars and to say I am supporter of your book.

Patricia Laster wrote 380 days ago

Dear Laila: Best of luck in promoting your book - your book deserves and merits widespread acceptance and it reigns on my bookshelf! I hope you will have a moment to check out the workbook, Refuge and Strength - YOUR comments would be greatly appreciated! Prayers, Pat

Patricia Laster wrote 381 days ago


Dear Laila: Not only did I put your book on my bookshelf but I also put this comment on the Christian Lit Forum:
I've just read "Stolen Childhood" by Laila Bevans. In all of my years as a psychologist, I have never encountered a young woman who survived what Laila survived. It seems impossible. What truly amazes me, once I get my mind wrapped around the idea that she survived, is what a remarkable woman she has become. She must be extraordinarily intelligent and courageous. She is certainly a survivor and deserves every ounce of support that she gets. She is a talented writer and her book is a good read. While it is hard to visualize the brutality of her childhood, her story and the way she tells it is fascinating. This book went immediately on my bookshelf.

Patricia Laster wrote 381 days ago

Dear Laila: I'm backing your book. It is an amazing story. I do not see how you survived that brutal, horrible childhood. You not only survived, but you became a remarkable woman and a very talented writer. I couldn't put your book down and read it from beginning to end - I only wish you had continued your story until the current day as it is a remarkable story of survival and of the resiliency of the human spirit. You must be a very, very intelligent and brave young woman and not only am i putting your book on my bookshelf, but I'm also putting you on my personal prayer list. I know God has good things in store for such a courageous young woman of faith as yourself. And now i've a favor to ask of you if and when you have the time. As a retired professor of psychology, I've written a workbook to help individuals such as yourself who have had to overcome terrible childhoods (although I've never me anyone who has had to overcome all you went through). It's titled, "Refuge and Strength for Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families." Would you take a look at it? Use anything in it that might help you. I'd also appreciate any support which you might feel you can give to the workbook.

irelandsmemories wrote 385 days ago

Hi Laila, I read your book this afternoon and am so deeply saddened by your childhood. Your innocence was taken from you but your soul and spirituality are your savior's.

I have never visited Noway, but your detailed decriptions create a vivid picture (even if the pictures were sad)...

Your introduction hooked me in... So many stories of abuse, sadness and despair but your spirit and life resonates today... The readers will embrace this memoir and you will be duly rewarded.

Good luck with your writings and your life
FC
I have rated this a six...

Permac wrote 386 days ago

Laila:

Stories that are a reflection of life, especially about children, aren't always easy to read. Especially when you have family members who have experienced similar situations. Your heart aches. Tears make it difficult to read. This is written very well. Great job.

Drew
"The Eyes of Tokorel"

irelandsmemories wrote 387 days ago

Hi Laila, I have just added you to my bookshelf and will read your story. This is certainly my genre, these life stories always demonstrate the passion and strength within.

Will comment soon
FC

kingsdaughter wrote 389 days ago

Hi Laila,

I hate taking books off my shelf, I feel so heartless, sorry I hate to make space for another one but I have kept it on my shelf as long as possible, if you need a boost again and want it back please let me know. I want to support you until the end, until you have achieved your goal.

I have added loads more to Chrsitian and Arabella, I am particularly fond of chapters 8&9, you will see why. They are totally unedited and a first draft, trying to see if the story ties together before I get stuck into unfolding it more and editing. I would love you to take a look and tell me what you think if you get a moment.

Love
Angela
xxx

PS I would love to connect on Facebook too www.facebook.com/kingsdaughter21 and perhaps on my blog
http://www.facebook.com/kingsdaughter21

Clare B wrote 399 days ago

You are welcome, I would be grateful if you could read the first chapter, it is only very small as it is a pocket book BE THE HUMAN SUNSHINE and leave a comment blessings Clare :)

Clare B wrote 401 days ago

I am immediately engrossed in this book from your, just reminds me of "A child call it" Dave Peltzer, I have read many books on child abuse, I work with young people who's lives too have been affected. Another amazing book is also called "UGLY" by Connie Bristow, such amazing strength and courage, throughout the book it shows you the gifts of human sunshine. Connie has an amazing life now, it is with hope that the person in your book has now too, I will leave my comments about your book over the next couple of days. Sharing my human sunbeam, I do hope you read Be The Human Sunshine, it is only a little pocket book it I hope it becomes a friend. Blessings Clare :)

fatema wrote 401 days ago

Sad, sad and hurt feeling. A child too much bitting, a whole atmosphere filled with hitting, bitting and abuse. Mum and dads meeting and then quarel, hiting. Well written. Grand parents are the positive hope here. Also there are travelling and holidays too seems to have a littlwe break from bitting. Sad for a child, oneday dad allowed to buy an icecream with choice of flavour. Clear writting. Ending with hope.

Dianna Lanser wrote 402 days ago

Hi Laila,

My twelve year old daughter and I read through chapter five of your book tonight. I must say we were both stunned by the horrible abuse that you, a precious little girl, had to endure. I asked myself the question that you have probably asked a million times: “Why God? Why didn’t you protect Laila?” From your introduction, I know you have been reconciled to God, and I am so glad. I will continue to read your story to learn more of your journey of healing and forgiveness. I’m sure it will be an inspiring and challenging testimony of trust and surrender.

In your introduction when you mentioned that you didn’t know if you could write in English, I thought that you must have hired someone to interpret for you - the story sounds and reads so naturally English. I am very impressed by its clear, easy to understand language. You have done a very remarkable job conveying your difficult and emotional past with grace and a sense of self-control. Six Stars!

Dianna Lanser
Nothing But The Blood

MDBVP wrote 412 days ago

I'm looking forward to reading

jenniferkillby wrote 412 days ago

Hello

I loved your story, especially truths that are hard to tell sometimes. I specialized in suicide research when I got my bachelors and masters degrees. People are always surprised of the age of the youngest who committed suicide. It was six months of age. It still plays with my mind when I think about it. Anyhow, you have a great story, but I saw some things that could pull the reader even deeper into your character. For instance: I would feel his nails plunge into my face until the blood flowed. Change this to: His nails plunged into my face until the blood flowed. Getting rid of filter words like "I could fee" sends the reader deep into the person's experience. The reader experiences as deeply as the character. I did this a lot when I first started writing and still let them slip by sometimes, but I joined a critique (it's free) site that helped me tremendously with all of those things. I feel you have a great story here and would like to see it flourish. It's one that needs to be told, in my humble opinion. If you're interested in finding out more about the critique site, let me know. I would definitely follow your book on it and help the best I can.

Thanks for sharing this wonderful story.
Jennifer Killby - The Legend of the Travelers: Willow's Journey

Six Foot Bonsai wrote 415 days ago

I like the somber tone of this book and I can visualize the scenes very well. Sometimes I get caught on word choice or comma placement, but some of this could be thought of as intentional with the language translation going on in your mind. The story about Aunt Wilma visiting is an interesting memory, but I'm not sure it fits well. One piece of advice I received was that I should not put in everything I was told or remember. I should just put in what makes the story move and put strong description around it. I'm still reading. I love the voice! Stacy G.

Atieno wrote 422 days ago

Dear Laila,
Without a doubt this is a real sad story, cratively done and your English is very agreeable, and am pleased to read this. Well done. highly starrated****** Am reading moore for me!
Well done.
Josphine

Adeel wrote 423 days ago

This book took me to past when I was a child and as a child always enjoyed the life to fullest. Those were the days when there were no worries and everyone cared for me. Those golden days of life could never come again. My childhood was the best part of my life for which i will always wish if it could come again. Thanks for bringing back those memories. 6 stars are quite less for this book but i could not give more than 6. Will definitely back it soon.

CharlaChowMaine wrote 425 days ago

Difficult stories aren't always easy to read, but are often worth it. Yours was worth it.

Kate LaRue wrote 428 days ago

Laila, you asked me to take a look at Stolen Childhood, and I have read the introduction and first chapter so far. This is very compelling and honest. It took a lot of bravery on your part to not only put your horrifying childhood into words, but to also share those words in order to help others.

This is the second or third memoir type manuscript I've looked at on the site. It is very well written, but beyond that I'm not sure if I am the best to give good advice as I'm not well read in this genre and not familiar with what works and what doesn't. What follows is just my opinion as a reader.

The introduction is heart wrenching, and I felt for you as a young girl trying to escape yet another beating at the hands of your brother. However, the scene is told looking back, and almost has a clinical feel to it, losing the depth of emotion that it really needs to pull the reader into your pain and fear. This really has the feel of an adult looking back on past experience, through the lenses of maturity, healing and forgiveness. That is certainly an acceptable way to write this, because that is essentially what you are doing. It just might be more powerful, and really pull the reader into the story, if you let more emotion bleed into your words. Were you scared, bleeding, in physical pain, was the emotional pain worse? As an eight year old, did you ever feel the abuse was your fault, that maybe you had done something to provoke the beating? How did you feel about your brother when he wasn't beating you? How much older was your brother?

Chapter one was hard to follow for me, and just felt like a lot of information, giving the background of your family, which could possibly be sprinkled into later chapters as needed. This is your story after all, and though your parents' backgrounds are important, this whole chapter pulled me out of the story. Maybe this is how memoirs are written, like I said I'm not an expert on the genre. I'd like to be given this information in connection to your own experience, rather than just told a lump of background.

Good luck with this book.

wordworker wrote 434 days ago

This story stands as testimony to the grace and mercy of our God. He takes each of us FROM RIGHT WHERE WE ARE and brings us, at our own pace, into the light of His presence! How merciful that is!
You've done an amazing job at depicting your childhool traumas but even more, telling of the mercy you have found at the feet of the Savior.
God bless you!

Joyce ~ Slave to Grace

Gail Pallotta wrote 434 days ago

I read through quite a bit of the first of the book then skipped to the end to see how it all had come out. It's a wonderful testimony to what God can do in people's lives. I'm so glad you're happy now and hope others who need your story will find it.