Book Jacket

 

rank 1743
word count 41538
date submitted 20.10.2008
date updated 04.04.2013
genres: Fiction, Children's
classification: universal
complete

Tree Talk

Ana Salote

Written from the viewpoint of a tree - quirky.

 

Galooshty - a billowing wind, 'like someone's shaking out a wet sheet in the sky.'
When Charlie climbs into his tree house, he also climbs into the tree's mind. Not only does he learn a thousand names for weather, but, in a shattering moment of insight he sees the future of the earth.
Charlie begins a project to save his own garden, not knowing that he will soon be called to much greater things.
Meanwhile the tree, Ash, learns how to think like a human. He struggles to understand beauty, humour and imagination. At first he is full of wonder but when his friend, the rat, tries to persuade him that humans are vermin, Ash begins to have doubts.
Eventually plants and animals sit in judgement on the human race and ask: might the planet be better off without them? Which way will Ash cast his vote?


'Wonderful...contemporary as tomorrow's newspaper.' Tim Smit (CEO Eden Project)

'This is a story for all human children, even if they consider themselves grown-ups.' Ian Roderick (Director, Schumacher Institute)

 
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tags

alternative, climate change, earth, ecology, environment, future, green, nature, new age, planet, tree spirit

on 13 watchlists

66 comments

 

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Chapters

15

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Catch a Falling Star

‘All I ask for now is that you keep an open mind,’ Wilfred warned, ‘but a day may come when I ask more. It’s time to let you in on a few secrets. The greatest gathering of gnostics ever held will take place very soon. In a few weeks I head North for the first session. The Pica is going to read the signs gathered from every corner of the earth and she will then predict the future of the planet as closely as it can be told. After that we vote.’

    ‘What about?’ I said, beginning to feel uneasy.

    ‘The humans. Is the planet a better place with or without them?’

    ‘And what if the vote goes against them.’

    ‘We have options.’

    ‘Such as?’

He slid over my question. The council’s aim, he said, was to save the planet from the humans who were destroying it. I would be on the agenda for the next meeting – how to get the plants involved.

     Now all this was a lot to take in. I said that I would have to think about it all very carefully and maybe talk to some of the other plants.

    Wilfred’s whiskers shot upright, ‘What do you mean talk to the other plants, you don’t mean that there are more like you.’

     It just slipped out. It was no good back-tracking. Wilfred was too sharp for that, so I played it down as much as I could.

    ‘Not exactly like me; but plants are more connected than animals, not so separate. I’ve been teaching some of them to think. Some can’t do it at all, but others are beginning to understand.’

    Wilfred shut up then. I looked at his energy field and it was boiling.

    ‘So you can pass it on,’ he said. ‘It’s here then, the turning point is here. This puts a new twist on things. I must consult.’

     He can be very dramatic. Sometimes I think he’s a secret soap-watcher on the quiet. Anyway he ran off.

    ‘Don’t go anywhere,’ he called back to me.

    As if.

    Brooke Farm’s theme tune was playing and I had missed the ending.

    The next night Wilfred came back and told me that I could be the Teacher they were all waiting for but I had to get serious, I had to give up my loyalty to Charlie.

It was no good my teaching the whole garden to think if all they wanted to do then was watch TV (if a tree could blush I would have flamed like a maple in September). Only the night before, half the garden was enthralled by Sally Durell’s wedding. I have a horror that Wilfred will catch us at it some time.

     ‘You could be one of the greats,’ Wilfred interrupted my guilty thoughts, ‘there is no doubt, you will be remembered and revered as first among flora.’

     ‘I think you’ve got the wrong tree. There’s nothing special about me.’

     ‘Self-evidently wrong. Stand tall; say hello to your destiny. I see it all. Maybe they can manage without animals for a while, though they won’t like it, but if the plants turn it’s goodbye humans.’

    ‘If they’re clever enough to make TVs, I think they can manage without us,’ I said.

  ‘You don’t get it do you?’ said Wilfred, amazed at my stupidity. ‘Without you lot we’d all die – you, the plants, are the most important things on this planet,’ and then he did a strange thing; almost involuntarily he bowed to me.

    The solemn moment dissolved as he rolled on his back, mouth lolling. He stayed there for a silly length of time.

   ‘Wilfred!’

   He didn’t move.

   ‘Wilfred, wouldn’t Adolf like to see that soft belly fur, and those pink pads   waving in the air.’

    That did it. He spun over.

    ‘Just making a point. That’s how we’d all be: every animal, humans included, would go belly up without you lot. You make the air breathable.’

    ‘Really?’

   ‘Yes. At dawn you’re breathing out pure oxygen. The birds get high on it and they sing at a vibration which helps the plants to grow.’

    ‘The dawn chorus.’

    ‘That’s right, a big old lovefest between the birds and the plants.’

     I liked that, the greenery and the birds together, literally breathing life into every new day.

    He looked at me shrewdly.

   ‘So you see how well we work together, flora and fauna. It could all be so perfect if it weren’t for…’

    I started folding my leaves into myself. There was truth in what he said but I didn’t want to see it. Wilfred saw me shutting down.

     ‘Alright, enough for one day; I know what you’re thinking – and as humans go,’ he took a deep breath, ‘he’s a decent kid,’ he said this quickly, as if the words stung his tongue and he needed to spit them out.

     I was listening again.

    ‘But there’s a lot at stake here,’ he went on. ‘The Pica showed you the rain forests. You, yes you, could save them. Or will you choose the boy?’

      And off he went. I felt torn. For the first time I regretted my gnosis. The head of the Pica floated into my mind with these words: ‘There’s no going back from knowing, but there’s peace at the end of the flight.’

     What I needed was to go green for a while, maybe for a whole day. The sun was setting and the sky was tiered like a purple stadium; the darkening tiers melted into soft furrows, melted again into smoke pillars and drifted away. Peace.

And something else; another feeling, but as I tried to hold it, it lost its substance like the clouds.

   I felt more settled then and rested deeply, only stirring when Charlie came stealthily up the ladder. Ever since Charlie’s night jaunt Eva had continued locking the chute at night – for her own peace of mind she said, so Charlie came the long way round and he came equipped for activity.

     He was carrying star charts and a compass. I nudged into his thoughts. He was preparing for something; something nice and exciting – a meteor shower, one of the best in years. That was good. I could use a distraction. I let the rest of the garden know. Everything stirred and we opened ourselves to the Western sky where Charlie was training his telescope. And what a show it was.

    The sky at that time was properly dark. The street lights died at midnight. If there were lights to be seen they were the small soft lights of candles, so the stars could be seen for what they truly were and starlight had a meaning again. I had not seen true starlight until the first lights out curfews. I hadn’t rested for a week then. I just gazed up, so that the branches which grew towards the sun started to spread more evenly towards the stars. In a true starlit sky there are dizzying ranks beyond ranks beyond ranks of stars; intense whites, haloes of red and blue, and they twinkle like in the rhyme.

     Against that curtain the meteor shower came down. The stars had started raining. Charlie threw his telescope aside and climbed as high into my branches as he could get. I did my best to lift him towards the stars and we watched together. Then just as we thought it was over one of the last falling lights carried on falling. It fell through space, it fell through sky, it fell through Cornwall. It was fire, a white ball with a tail of fire. My branch bent under Charlie’s weight straining upward. I thought: he’s doing that, he’s bringing the meteor down, he wants to catch a falling star. And he held out his arms.

     I was holding him, he wasn’t holding on to me. The whole garden was lit

 

with the fire. The shrews and moles and cats looked up with white blind-

 

seeming eyes. Charlie, for heaven’s sake, I thought, and the blazing rock

 

seemed to pass right between his hands before it burrowed a full foot down

 

into the garden. Eerie space steam rose from the hole. We all gasped and

 

waited for the little alien to come crawling out – I was sure that it would look

 

like a cat, but there was nothing. The steam got less and we waited for it to

 

cool. Charlie didn’t want to dowse it with water in case he washed off any

 

magical space dust. Eventually he got impatient and fetched the fireplace

 

tongs. Then he lay it on a piece of foil and brought it up into the tree to cool.

 

The sky was lightening in the East, so Charlie slipped back indoors and I was

 

left alone with the space rock.

 

     I had a spooky feeling running just under my bark, as though I was being

 

watched. I looked around the garden just greying in the dawn. Three sets of

 

black eyes were trained on Charlie’s bedroom window. Two magpies were

 

posted in the apple trees at each edge of the garden; one sat higher in a fir.

 

My thoughts went out to them questioning, but their thoughts were running in

 

a stream far above mine. I felt tired then but I did not rest easy. 

 

    Later, I was not the only one watching as Charlie turned the rock carefully in

 

his hands. It was a small, dull-looking thing. He pushed my branches to one

 

side so that the morning sun fell on it, and then the patterns showed: red

 

veins branched across it; at the end of one branch were dark swirls, at the

 

end of the other, a shine. The shine was not visible in the shade, only in the

 

sunlight did this spot shine like a mirror.

 

     ‘Wow,’ said Charlie quietly to himself. The rock felt warm and heavy in his

 

cupped hands, then I felt all his being lift; the very brain in his head was rising.

 

Everything about him strained upwards, then gradually he settled back into

 

himself.

 

     ‘This is it, Ash. Phase two is here. Adapt and survive. That’s what the

 

garden has to do, and there’s no time to waste, no time at all.’ He swung one-

 

armed down the rope.  

 

     Just then Eva came out cradling some bugs she’d rescued from a

 

cabbage. She was about to free them when she stumbled and almost fell into

 

the mini crater.

 

     ‘What the…’ she said looking down, up and all around. ‘Have we been

 

bombed?’

 

     ‘Meteor,’ said Charlie, ‘Seen my library card. Got to go,’ and he skidded

 

through the house.

 

     A few nights later the excitement was over apart from the hole in the

 

garden, and a few moles still shocked by the sudden air in their tunnels. Eva

 

wanted to take the rock to the museum but Charlie worried that he wouldn’t

 

get it back, so he kept it in the treehouse and did tests on it. He found that it

 

did funny things to magnets. Sometimes he just stared at it like his mind could

 

follow it back out to where it came from.

 

     Wilfred came to see me. I hadn’t seen him for a while. He’d been in the

 

hills two counties away, he said, at a meeting. He inspected the hole and

 

shook his head.

 

    ‘Strange days, one more omen.’

 

    ‘Of what?’ I asked.

 

    Wilfred peered into the hole and shuddered. He raised himself onto his hind

 

legs and sniffed the wind: ‘It’s coming soon, I see it.’

 

     ‘Can’t anybody give a straight answer round here?’

 

     ‘We must wait for the council. Mother Pica will dwell on the signs we

 

have gathered; when she is ready she will speak.’

 

     He asked me lots of questions about the rock.

 

     ‘Branches – choices most likely. The shine – the future I would guess if we

 

make the right choice.’

 

     ‘Or maybe it’s just another rock,’ I said.

 

     ‘Or maybe it’s just another rock. Don’t balance on the fence too long my

 

friend. You may get blown off.’

 

 

 

 

Chapters

15

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memphisgirl wrote 112 days ago

This has a great measure of promise. I would, as some suggest, revise the pitch. Maybe you could read a few pitches from great children's books and get some ideas. The premise of your book is compelling enough to raise curiosity, but the pitch should attract your target YA audience. I would edit the opening chs of your manuscript with the single focus of drawing out character and showing rather than telling. I needed more dialogue, action, conflict (things happening and moving toward a Great Reckoning). I like the dreamy way the tree interacts with the kids, but along with that, I need the give and take of dialogue to register the conflicts a human and a tree would experience trying to understand each other. Charlie understands "Ash" better than anyone, but Charlie is still human, and there is much juicy conflict of wills to draw from that. Whatever you do, put it before some agents and publishers soon before someone else comes up with this concept. Good luck!

Lisa (Memphis Girl -- Joli Blon Gone/Drowning Lessons)

Kevin Bergeron wrote 186 days ago

I'm up to Chapter 9, and really enjoying this story. The point of view, perceptions, voice and character of Ash is amazing. Also, there's a compelling story that involves several smaller stories within it. There are various human relationships, relationships between plants, between plants and animals, between plants and humans, and even contains ideas how to save electricity and reduce your environmental impact. I think this book may have an appeal to children between the ages of maybe 11 and 14, but I'm 60 and I really like it a lot. It could be that the book will appeal more to adults than children, but, like Shel Silverstein's "The Giving Tree," has something to say and may appeal to both adults and children.

Things you might want to fix: Some places you use single spacing, and other places are double spaced. There's one chapter (either ch 5 or ch 6) which contains additonal chapters, so that there are about three chapters that you have posted twice.

A very compelling story so far. I'll just have to read on to find out what is in the letter hidden under the bread bin.

Best wishes to you and your book.

Kevin

Eileen Kardos wrote 356 days ago


I really like the ideas in your pitch. It’s terrific that a boy crawls inside the mind of a tree, and the tree does the same in return. This is a great set-up. Of course the animal world will sit in judgement of the human one – it’s about time!

Since this is aimed at children, I thought perhaps the pitch was written in a somewhat too adult way, or somehow it could be more grabby, and … I am not sure, because kids’ fiction is not my world. But it read fine to me as a 55 year old, so would that really read OK for a kid too? Maybe more plot, more excitement, more - I don’t know. It just didn’t seem like talking to kids, somehow, with words like billowing, shattering insight, beauty and imagination, for example. What age group is this for?

I think I’d change the first line of the pitch – for one thing, the boy and the tree seem to get equal points of view, and it’s about their relationship, both of them. Also, “quirky” is an adult word, I think. I may totally be out of touch with the world of youth, obviously! It’s just that this is what crossed my mind – and this is the place for feedback..

To start right in with the POV of the tree is lovely. And how sensible this one is, and curious, and intelligent, open-minded, and sweet. I love his pact of secrecy with the boy. This is charming. And tree houses, of course, are pure magic.

Ah, you suddenly go into double-spacing – looks like a glitch, so you might want to re-format that – this is just after the tree house is constructed.

Five branches as a protective hand – this is a lovely image.

Again, I haven’t a clue about kids’ books, so I do not know what age this would be aimed at. The reading level is fairly high – much higher than the age of the boy in the story. Does that matter? Do you want the readers to be about the same age as the boy, or is that not the point?

There are some wonderful messages in here that are very welcome to hear, so I really hope you do well with this.

Best wishes from

Eileen Kardos
The Noodle Trail

FrancesK wrote 375 days ago

a great idea, full of character, humour and ingenious made up words. I can think of several small relatives who would love to read this. Havent read to the end, but there is much good observation tied in with your imagination. Highly starred - Frances

salote wrote 376 days ago

I've only read the first four chapters, but I'm hooked. This is enchanting! Can't wait to read what happens next!


Thank you, Liz. Let me know if you manage to get your head round e-publishing.

E. A. Beckett wrote 376 days ago

I've only read the first four chapters, but I'm hooked. This is enchanting! Can't wait to read what happens next!

M.T.H wrote 382 days ago

Written from the viewpoint of a tree? Excellent! I instantly put you on my bookshelf after reading that; very original.
Can't wait to start reading... oh dear, I'm beginning to remember some of the things I've done to trees over the years... there was that time in Falcon Wood with the pot of honey, the matches, the tadpoles, and the drunken Nun...

Margaret0307 wrote 392 days ago

This book is described in the pitch as quirky - and it certainly is! A must-read for anyone looking for something a bit different! It is not just a children's book - perhaps not even a children's book, but for adults who want to enjoy beautiful writing, a different kind of thinking and a unique story.

Highly starred
Margaret
How do I know I know God?

Wanttobeawriter wrote 392 days ago

TREE TALK
I downloaded this because I don’t think I’ve ever read a book before written by a tree. And I love this. As much as I’m sure your children’s audience will love it. It’s so easy for people to tell children they need to be good to our environment or our earth will suffer; reading this book does that so much better. I can’t believe anyone can read this and ever think of trees as just something to be cleared away again. Highly starred and added to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

patio wrote 392 days ago

Tree Talk is told elegantly. I love how you connect your readers to nature with description the garden. And connect to reality with the situation of getting on with neighbours.

Tree Talk is fluid and reader-friendly. I'm hooked.

recommended

Adeel wrote 395 days ago

Writing fiction is not an easy thing but writing it for children is absolutely not easy. Your book is not only entertaining but also well written and quite able to grab the readers.Good charachterization and dialogues show your abilities. Highly rated.

Atieno wrote 396 days ago

Dear Ana,
I think this book is so clever, so deep and so thoughtful.I must agree the author is quite an insightful person. Such special thoughts?Wow. Charlie and the tree, what are eyes for, the best question was where do you feel yourself?
So clever!
6 stars and watchlisted to be read slowly. This is really a beauty and not just a kids story!
Josphine

salote wrote 396 days ago

Thanks for your forensic reading, Andrew. There are things I hadn't thought of there. You'd make a good editor.
Ana

Hi Ana,

I read the first two chapters, thought I’d leave a comment for now. You’ve a lovely writing style, elegant and clear – it’s a pleasure to read.

It’s really interesting to enter the consciousness of the tree and the things he (she?) notices and details described seem just right, like his obsession with the weather. I like the portrait of the garden and the comparisons with the neighbours. I was a bit confused by his age, he seems to be 62, but he says he can remember Eva and Charlie in his early days.

The flash of consciousness is well described. I particularly liked how he felt Charlie was an extra branch. I wondered should we see Pete driving in nails into some branches and what that felt like.

The way Charlie and Ash compare their natures is fascinating and beautifully rendered. Since Ash dwells on eyes it rather raises the question of how he sees, it seems he can perceive visually through any branch or twig. I wonder is there a way to explain how that’s possible, I think the reader will believe it anyway.

It’s cool how Ash learns about the world through the TV. It struck me that the words ‘programmes’ and ‘soaps’ were too technical for him to know (though reading on I see Ash’s unique opinions of how humans name things, which works well). Preferring Brooke Farm because of all the weather was very funny!

And the more poignant elements of your story are introduced very deftly – how imagination can lead to worry, and the strains in the household. Ash’s descriptions of different types of weather are wonderful – I think only Ash should be assigning the names, since he knows what they are. Charlie would just be learning.

And then Charlie’s own flash of insight lends a new sense of urgency to the narrative.

It’s an excellent start. Hope to read more soon. 6 stars.

Best of luck with it, and the other two books.
Andrew.
The Morning Drop

salote wrote 396 days ago

That's so nice to hear - what ages are they? Thanks for backing. I have WL'ed First Fracture. I'd like to look at the rewrite. I don't think I'd be brave enough to put a first draft out. If I were you I'd give the first couple of pages a polish so as not to put off the pedants (flecks and dagger's). I know people who won't read anything on kindle with typos etc. You are really tuned in to how children think, their humour and what holds their attention.
Good luck with it.
Ana

Further to my comment a little while ago - The kids absolutely loved it!

Andrew Hughes wrote 396 days ago

Hi Ana,

I read the first two chapters, thought I’d leave a comment for now. You’ve a lovely writing style, elegant and clear – it’s a pleasure to read.

It’s really interesting to enter the consciousness of the tree and the things he (she?) notices and details described seem just right, like his obsession with the weather. I like the portrait of the garden and the comparisons with the neighbours. I was a bit confused by his age, he seems to be 62, but he says he can remember Eva and Charlie in his early days.

The flash of consciousness is well described. I particularly liked how he felt Charlie was an extra branch. I wondered should we see Pete driving in nails into some branches and what that felt like.

The way Charlie and Ash compare their natures is fascinating and beautifully rendered. Since Ash dwells on eyes it rather raises the question of how he sees, it seems he can perceive visually through any branch or twig. I wonder is there a way to explain how that’s possible, I think the reader will believe it anyway.

It’s cool how Ash learns about the world through the TV. It struck me that the words ‘programmes’ and ‘soaps’ were too technical for him to know (though reading on I see Ash’s unique opinions of how humans name things, which works well). Preferring Brooke Farm because of all the weather was very funny!

And the more poignant elements of your story are introduced very deftly – how imagination can lead to worry, and the strains in the household. Ash’s descriptions of different types of weather are wonderful – I think only Ash should be assigning the names, since he knows what they are. Charlie would just be learning.

And then Charlie’s own flash of insight lends a new sense of urgency to the narrative.

It’s an excellent start. Hope to read more soon. 6 stars.

Best of luck with it, and the other two books.
Andrew.
The Morning Drop

Famlavan wrote 396 days ago

Further to my comment a little while ago - The kids absolutely loved it!

salote wrote 397 days ago

'Tree Talk' a book for reading to your children, in the garden on a summer's afternoon. And then give them the book as an heirloom. I love you style, you have a deep consciousness, an understanding - some people get 'it' and some people don't. If you have to ask what 'it' is, then you clearly don't. You get it!
Great stuff, I shall return to your work when I need lifting up.

regards
Cyrus (Hellion 2)


Hi Cyrus,
Thanks for your lovely comment. I've WL'ed your book as your interests have made me curious.
Ana

Cyrus Hood wrote 397 days ago

'Tree Talk' a book for reading to your children, in the garden on a summer's afternoon. And then give them the book as an heirloom. I love you style, you have a deep consciousness, an understanding - some people get 'it' and some people don't. If you have to ask what 'it' is, then you clearly don't. You get it!
Great stuff, I shall return to your work when I need lifting up.

regards
Cyrus (Hellion 2)

salote wrote 400 days ago

Hi Leelah,
I'm slowly absorbing A Course in Miracles and have just read Franny and Zooey so I'll be dipping into your book with interest. Thanks for Shelving Tree Talk.
Ana

I love any book that helps us see that everything alive has consciousness and perception. I believe in this tree.
backed and six-starred
leelah Saachi ( seemingly grown up)

leelah wrote 400 days ago

I love any book that helps us see that everything alive has consciousness and perception. I believe in this tree.
backed and six-starred
leelah Saachi ( seemingly grown up)

Estelene wrote 401 days ago

Loved the sentence, “I lived in a sort of green vapour…” I know a lot of people who live in a green vapor, not even aware of where they end and the rest of the world begins. I read “The Giving Tree” to my daughter when she was young, and this seems to me to be a more sophisticated version of Silverstein, much more interesting. I also enjoyed the scene with Wilfred, ranting about the humans and their five senses, only to be reminded they have six—never thought of humor as being the sixth sense, but I liked that—it definitely does help us survive, doesn’t it?

I'm putting you on my watchlist until I get a chance to read more.

Famlavan wrote 405 days ago

Impressive how you create humanity from a different perspective. I have echoing in my head "Knowledge comes from a single perspective, wisdom from multiple perspectives" - this has the touch of wisdom - well done. I have rated this highly, however the real test is my kids - they're mean critics - Will let you know - Good luck

Candymace wrote 408 days ago

This book has probably the most unusual point of view of any book here. It is no mean feat to get the reader seeing things from the perspective of a tree but somehow the author manages it. The story is fun but it has a real environmental message. A tree watching soaps? What an imagination. I loved the concept of the tree befriending humans in such a way. I liked the perception of auras and the gradual increase in the ability to see.
I don't think there were many mistake of grammar and so on. I wonder what age group it is intended for as some of the language and concepts were simple but others were more complex (e.g. vapour).
My only suggestion would be to convert some of the telling into showing, e.g. by describing action as it happened with dialogue directly. A very unique and interesting book. Candy.

Tod Schneider wrote 408 days ago

I'm always delighted to find something fresh and different, and this fits the bill. I haven't seen a tree as a protagonist before, so it's only appropriate to root for this one! I imagine any kid who reads this will be bugging their parents to put in a chute!
Best of luck with this!
Tod

salote wrote 408 days ago

Hello Ana,
Chaps 1-3. I'm here because you are no5 talent spotter. This wouldn't be my usual read. And, having read it, I know now that it would have been my loss if I'd missed it.
Gentle, rich and strong are the words that spring to mind. Technically this looks and feels good with the exposition at the start leading seamlessly into the present and further to that the dialogue-driven scenes. Nice flow.
The characters are appealing, the MC-the tree-sounding tree, feels entirely right. Maybe more of a hinted at selfish/solitary trait would make the character more rounded but I'm not sure.
'I sense light and colour' - sounds abit too sophisticated for a young'un. I accept that the tree was the first thing he saw, that statement seems plausible in a thoughtful child.
Very good, makes you feel good after reading it too.
6 stars and on my WL.
John
Dropping Babies-no right angles and concrete kept to a minimum.



Ditto - crime not my usual genre, however I'll drop by and have a look when my should've done yesterday list thins. Thanks for shelving.
Ana

johnpatrick wrote 408 days ago

Hello Ana,
Chaps 1-3. I'm here because you are no5 talent spotter. This wouldn't be my usual read. And, having read it, I know now that it would have been my loss if I'd missed it.
Gentle, rich and strong are the words that spring to mind. Technically this looks and feels good with the exposition at the start leading seamlessly into the present and further to that the dialogue-driven scenes. Nice flow.
The characters are appealing, the MC-the tree-sounding tree, feels entirely right. Maybe more of a hinted at selfish/solitary trait would make the character more rounded but I'm not sure.
'I sense light and colour' - sounds abit too sophisticated for a young'un. I accept that the tree was the first thing he saw, that statement seems plausible in a thoughtful child.
Very good, makes you feel good after reading it too.
6 stars and on my WL.
John
Dropping Babies-no right angles and concrete kept to a minimum.

Numbers wrote 413 days ago

Hi Ana,

This is delightful. It's well written and intriguing. You have a very ambitious and unique POV and it works so well!

It makes for an entertaining read full of information and representative of some very real issues.

I couldn't pick out any mistakes, to me it reads flawlessly and I could see it being read by children and adults of all ages.

Highly starred.

Cheers,
Adam

salote wrote 415 days ago


Hello Ana--

book - Tree Talk--

That nice attractive cover brought me in for the read and when I read the pitch; i said ; wow; this is going to be different-so- have to say , after reading the first 5 and at least 5 more at random further down the book; last night ; I enjoyed this very original tale of a tree and the idea of the narrator a tree is brilliant-
It is just one lovely, entertaining feel good read; perfect for children of all ages. and growing ones-
The dialogue between the tree and Charlie is just priceless-
I recommend this read to all to enjoy- yes it is different- with great use of imagination-
it gets my six stars with pleasure-

tom bye
book - from hugs to kisses-
oblige please Ana and glance at mine, about a young boy growing up in 40s Dublin- and it's full of fantasy and humour-you might enjoy chapter 4-



Hello Tom,
Thanks for your kind comments on Tree Talk. I'm a sucker for all things Irish (went to see the Waterboys last night - Appointment with Mr Yeats; love all that flutey, whistly, fiddley, jiggy stuff with Yeats's poetry) - anyway, yes, I will have a look at your book over Easter.
Ana

Tom Bye wrote 415 days ago

Hello Ana--

book - Tree Talk--

That nice attractive cover brought me in for the read and when I read the pitch; i said ; wow; this is going to be different-so- have to say , after reading the first 5 and at least 5 more at random further down the book; last night ; I enjoyed this very original tale of a tree and the idea of the narrator a tree is brilliant-
It is just one lovely, entertaining feel good read; perfect for children of all ages. and growing ones-
The dialogue between the tree and Charlie is just priceless-
I recommend this read to all to enjoy- yes it is different- with great use of imagination-
it gets my six stars with pleasure-

tom bye
book - from hugs to kisses-
oblige please Ana and glance at mine, about a young boy growing up in 40s Dublin- and it's full of fantasy and humour-you might enjoy chapter 4-

elmo2 wrote 600 days ago

this is a hard one, i will back it, i think it is, after the first four chapters i have read, doing valiantly, seems to me you have to walk across a stream on some slippery stones while keeping this story from falling, arguing for and finding unification for differing states of consciosness in this world and doing so within the framework of a "child's tale" (though one intended i am sure for alll ages) seems tricky, you can be too simple, leaving people to dismiss it as unrealistic or too complicated leaving them to think it "misses the forest for the trees" (in this case possibly tree), and besides that the story brings with it built in controvery, those who deny climate change will dismiss it out of it hand, so lots of hurdles, the strength of the story is the writing itself, sentences and phrasing are smooth and engaging, i wish you luck with this

salote wrote 699 days ago

Thanks Katie. This book is already self-published and I've now got an agent for the next one so that's where I'm focused at the moment. Had a quick look at your book. I can't fault your style so i've shelved. If I get time to read more I will.

i thought i could help with your pitch- feel free to ignore me if it doesn't sound right to you.

Short pitch: A quirky tale written from the viewpoint of a tree.

Long pitch:

When Charlie climbs into his tree house, he also climbs into the tree's mind. Not only does he learn a thousand names for weather, but, in a shattering moment of insight he sees the future of the earth.

Ash, the tree, learns to think like a human, struggling to understand beauty, humour and imagination. But he doesn't like everything he learns. There's also selfishness, hatred, sorrow (you pick the qualities).

When plants and animals sit in judgement of the human race, they ask whether the planet might be better off without them. Which way will Ash cast his vote?

katie78 wrote 699 days ago

i thought i could help with your pitch- feel free to ignore me if it doesn't sound right to you.

Short pitch: A quirky tale written from the viewpoint of a tree.

Long pitch:

When Charlie climbs into his tree house, he also climbs into the tree's mind. Not only does he learn a thousand names for weather, but, in a shattering moment of insight he sees the future of the earth.

Ash, the tree, learns to think like a human, struggling to understand beauty, humour and imagination. But he doesn't like everything he learns. There's also selfishness, hatred, sorrow (you pick the qualities).

When plants and animals sit in judgement of the human race, they ask whether the planet might be better off without them. Which way will Ash cast his vote?

Gefordson wrote 739 days ago

Ana,
‘Tree talk’ was an absolute pleasure to read, back and rate highly.
It’s nice to come across something on the site that’s genuinely different. I love the book’s overall message and feel that your heart is definitely in the right place.
I used to write children’s fiction/drama and my only reservation is that it’s hard to work out which age group you would pitch for. Children’s publishing is very fussy now (and very age specific). In some ways your writing has an ageless Phillipa Pearce quality but that would require quite a sophisticated reading age/sensibility. Equally whilst on occasions the prose takes no prisoners the dialogue is snappy/modern/believable which tends to pull the reader in different directions age wise. (And on the speech front it might be worth making the tree’s voice really odd).
It might be worth editing this down in a second version to the main story and best bits of dialogue to see if it still hits the one hundred page mark.
Bets of luck with it. A great idea well executed.
Geoff.
Nothing you can do.

Dyangray wrote 844 days ago

Hello Ana,
What a fascinating point of view from which to tell a story, and it turns out to be both strange and familiar. I love your use of unexpected, descriptive words, i.e., ..."insects trekked about.." When you think about it, they really do a lot of 'trekking about,' don't they? It all makes me examine my own way of seeing and expressing my thoughts. I will continue reading. I'm backing this and shelving it, too. Children's books are so important. I hope you will take a minute to check out my small offering, "9 in 'Forty-nine." Thanks so much for letting us view this.
Dyangray

Nigel Fields wrote 846 days ago

Ana,
One of the rewards of being on Authonomy is that I find myself reading children's literature. This is a very professional and well-written (orchestrated, conceived) piece. Great opening line. I loved: you can't pack up and move away. I smiled through the first three chapters that I read this morning. Chukled at: as I practised some human sayings. I'll have to find a way to move you along to my shelf. 6 Stars and WL'd for now. Thank you for uploading this here.
Regards, John B Campbell (Walk to Paradise Garden)

Cindy Haversham wrote 858 days ago

Greetings, Orlando got me to take a look into your tree story. I like the story on the superficial level and feel that it wld hold childrens' attention. I also think the outlook behind it is in keeping with the love of nature we should all be embracing.
C

Orlando Furioso wrote 885 days ago

Ch 2
The December-crushed man in me nodded strongly at 'There was too much to take in.' Such is modern life. Too much flim-flam. Really like, 'humans think in chains, and chains are stories...and the stories don't have to be real.' Yes, when you think of how we are, from a trees perspective we are astonishinly odd. The notion of seeing ourselves from the outside fascinates. 'It's called imagination.' The tree resembles one of Plato's cave dwellers who is discovering the nature of reality. It seems salutory to try and see outselves from without. We might learn something useful about ourselves. All of which appeals to the intellect. But the most moving part of this ch was towards the end where the tree begins to empathise with the sad boy. Many kids wld, sadly, identify with the sad boy because of their own broken backgrounds. Sigh.

Orlando Furioso wrote 889 days ago

Hi Ana, I've stuck you on the watchlist and will back your tree house when a place becomes free on my shelf. I am keen to hear how the debate goes and how Rat argues the case for the prosecution. So I will read on anon.
Ron

Orlando Furioso wrote 889 days ago

'Not even the memory of a weed' stands out for me because there are many in this world that wld have all of it just like that, one giant homogonised shopping mall fit for their global brands to dominate the earth. No fat people, no failures, no misfits, no one who does not fit into the spreadsheet fascists' view of the earth. I work in such a place -- Canary Wharf -- where the trees, what few their are are woeful looking things, pruned into perfect boxes all overshadowed by the works of man, man, man, glorious man. When that judgement comes that you refer to I don't think our chances are favourable, as things stand. We have mortally offended Nature a great many times. Your story reminds me of a tree house at Alnwick ... alas that is not a natural tree house such as the one you in your story, but a commercial giant, themed tree house, with restaurants etc. I far prefer the charm of yours.

Orlando Furioso wrote 889 days ago

I like everything about your pitch, which is charming, witty and intensely serious. I can imagine children being taken with this and I can imagine teachers and parents being happy to put such a story their way. I approve of the notion that we are the ones who stand to be judged, though in truth I don't think persuading profit-seeking realists to take such a view of things is difficult. But we must continue trying. And starting with children seems a very good place. Ash is the tree at the heart of the Norse world view. Alas, we don't pay enough attention to trees as we flock to cities ... and leave them behind.

Walden Carrington wrote 941 days ago

Ana,
Tree Talk is a charming and original tale which should captivate the imagination of young minds. Backed with pleasure.

Andrew Burans wrote 988 days ago

You have written a very interesting and unique storyline, which I do like, and created most memorable main characters in Charlie and Ash. I also really like your use of the first person narrative voice as told by the tree. The dialogue is realistic and well written and the pace of your story flows well. All of this along with your descriptive writing ensures that your work will appeal to the childrens audience. Backed with pleasure.

Andrew Burans
The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Burgio wrote 1004 days ago

TREE TALK
This is certainly an original story; how many times do you get to read a story told by a tree? It’s also thought provoking as Ash and Charlie educate each other about humans and trees. I think you’ll find a wide audience for this among schoolagers who are tired of Harry Potter magic and will enjoy something as basic as being friends with a tree. The “be kind to trees” message will appeal to their parents (good, because they’re the people with the money). I’m happy to add it to my shelf. If you have a moment, would you look at mine (Grain of Salt)? I’m in 3rd place but only holding on by my teeth. Burgio

Jim Darcy wrote 1008 days ago

The mother-in-law wants to be buried under a rowan. :)
Great premise well carried out and very engaging.
Jim Darcy
The Firelord's Crown

m clement hall wrote 1471 days ago

TREE TALK (Ana Salote)
There's been much discussion on the fora (forums?) on point of view -- here we have an undoubtedly 1st. person POV as the world is seen by a sixty year old mountain ash (rowan) tree. Since these trees keep the witches away it's not surprising to have it in communication with a boy who is fully conversant and understands its feelings.
Backed for originality and execution.
mch
http://mclementhall.com

Karen Carr wrote 1549 days ago

Hi Ana,
Yes, this is quirky. I had to go back and read the synopsis. You write well, the oak tree though -- hmm -- i'm having trouble thinking the MC is really the voice of the oak tree, sounds more like a regular person, but I guess I dont know what an oak tree would sound like if they knew how to talk/think. I think this would make a great picture book if the voice was a little younger maybe? Also, the boy is sweet. I'd like to see more of a plot, but again tough to do from a tree's perspective. You are a good writer, and I can't think of any nitpiks with this piece technically.
Karen

salote wrote 1599 days ago

Hi Ana,
Have read 2 chs of this - interesting idea a child and a tree communicating and having a story written from perspective of the tree.
I like the tree learning of the human world through Charlie and the reciprocation, and the adults being outside this link.
But in my 'reading critically mode' and this is of course only my opinion - you must make your own judgement - there were some things that I think you might find worth thinking about.
I didn't find the opening paras very engaging, but that changed when I got to the 'day of my awakening..' I would find this a more effective starting point - partly because it is the starting point of the story, but also because it is personal to the tree, rather than philosophical, as your current opening.
Focusing on the tree seeing the world through Charlie's eyes seems to me to be central to the story and other influences - ie the tree watching telly are a distraction. THe tree learning the term 'soaps' and the names of them, apparently by itself wasn't convincing - if Charlie had talked about them that would have been different.
I also found the sudden introduction of the term 'aura' in ch 2 awkward. One issue for a children's book is to think carefully about the vocabulary level and scope for the target age group.
However there are some lovely phrases here - the tree house being a farewell gift for Charlie / the tree not wanting Charlie to be at home when his parents are fighting - that was a gem. Also the terms for weather - this is exactly the sort of thing to appeal to children.
I wish you well with it,

Margaret (Munro's Choice)

Hi Margaret,
Thanks for taking the time to read at this busy time of year. I appreciate your comments. If I'd been writing specifically for a market I think it wd have been closer to your recommendations. I did write it, primarily, as a parable, with no age group in mind. I think subconsciously the philosophy was paramount so that's what came out first. I'll try to read more of your book soon. From the first page I can see that you're an accomplished writer. It reads like a published work. Scotland is the most beautiful place on earth so I'm biased towards the setting. I'll be reading to see if I'm engaged by the characters.
Ana

mskea wrote 1609 days ago

Hi Ana,
Have read 2 chs of this - interesting idea a child and a tree communicating and having a story written from perspective of the tree.
I like the tree learning of the human world through Charlie and the reciprocation, and the adults being outside this link.
But in my 'reading critically mode' and this is of course only my opinion - you must make your own judgement - there were some things that I think you might find worth thinking about.
I didn't find the opening paras very engaging, but that changed when I got to the 'day of my awakening..' I would find this a more effective starting point - partly because it is the starting point of the story, but also because it is personal to the tree, rather than philosophical, as your current opening.
Focusing on the tree seeing the world through Charlie's eyes seems to me to be central to the story and other influences - ie the tree watching telly are a distraction. THe tree learning the term 'soaps' and the names of them, apparently by itself wasn't convincing - if Charlie had talked about them that would have been different.
I also found the sudden introduction of the term 'aura' in ch 2 awkward. One issue for a children's book is to think carefully about the vocabulary level and scope for the target age group.
However there are some lovely phrases here - the tree house being a farewell gift for Charlie / the tree not wanting Charlie to be at home when his parents are fighting - that was a gem. Also the terms for weather - this is exactly the sort of thing to appeal to children.
I wish you well with it,

Margaret (Munro's Choice)

salote wrote 1620 days ago

Ana,
finally got here and I can only echo the comments of others. I really like it (as you might remember, a tree features heavily at the start of mine) and have thoroughly enjoyed the first four chapters. Add to that the fact you're educating the next generation, then you are deservedly on my shelf.
Cheers,
Simon


Thanks Simon, I'm up to ch3 of Doubts, enjoying the slow build up and really looking forward to finding out where it's going - only wish I had hard copy.

Ali Cooper wrote 1620 days ago

Hi Ana, this is so sweet. I've only read a bit for now as I'm supposed to be going for a walk (and maybe hugging some trees) before it gets dark but I couldn't resist a quick look. I do like what I'm reading but I felt, at the beginning, that I'd accidentally jumped in a paragraph or two after the start. Maybe because it is for children, I'm wanting it to start very simply. something like, I've spent all my life in the same place. beginning with the tree (ie the main character) and spreading out from there to introduce other plants in the garden, then moving on to species that move. that's my instinct but it's your book and I shouldn't be suggesting how you write it! I love the bit about the 'surprise weather' by the way. Ali.

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