That Indian Summer And The Equilibrium

i really like the book and recommend it to others

You have a very compelling and unique book premise here, and the cultural setting gives a refreshing break from the predominantly western fantasy books that we encounter on this site and elsewhere. I must also add that you write lucidly and well, and have a clear voice. The nature of your book also promises to take it across genres that might not be immediately apparent. I must add, however, that your literary level is a bit too high for a children's book. The same goes for the length of your paragraphs. Moreover, the length of the narrative opening of your book might be a bit too heavy for children. You might want to shorten the paragraphs and add more dialogue, which children find more interesting. You might also want to reduce the vocabulary level. Alternatively, you might choose to write for a different audience entirely. In closing, I would like to express my appreciation of how you have continuously backed my book and helped its progress. Thanks very much.

Just joined and read the first three chapters, it's better than Harry Potter and even in the same league as The Hobbit. Will read on and hope to finish it soon. Keep up the good work, i can see this being the next big book of the summer. Claire.

A bold and rousing premise – truly fantasy at its most ambitious. Lucidly and sensibly written. Indeed, the opening made me wonder if I had heard right, that this was fiction. And, yes, I think I could discern a spin off the Bible. I must say, however, that the pitch doesn’t really match the writer’s pedigree. It falls short of the literary flair of the book. Content-wise, it is excellent, but you need to work on the literary aspects of it. Also watch your punctuation. A brilliant and endearing effort!

A bold and rousing premise – truly fantasy at its most ambitious. Lucidly and sensibly written. Indeed, the opening made me wonder if I had heard right, that this was fiction. And, yes, I think I could discern a spin off the Bible. I must say, however, that the pitch doesn’t really match the writer’s pedigree. It falls short of the literary flair of the book. Content-wise, it is excellent, but you need to work on the literary aspects of it. Also watch your punctuation. A brilliant and endearing effort!

This book should become one of the worlds greatist all time reads in my mind better than any childrens fantasy fiction ive read in years keep up the good work cheryl.

Great read...!

full marks. interesting story. fantastic. love the picture . cath

brilliant shou;ld be made a film



nick

hello there my good man, i give this book a rating of 8/10 the first few chapters are very good and i cant wait to read more.

fairwell my friend

brilliant book shouyld be made into a film

I see that you are the top children's book on the sight as of today! Congrats! I decided to come over and take a look, since I write for children myself. I thought you had the perfect mixture of intrigue(keep the kids turning the page) and actual factual information(first paragraph). You have a way of weaving these two elements together to create a successful story. I am starring and watch listing you. I will be back for more. Any comments on Maddy Hatfield and the Magic Locket are much appreciated!

Best,

Ashley

This is a very compelling work you have put together. I am amazed at your imagination. I usually end up getting lost in these types of work but you have laid it out very smoothly and it really flows. Good job so far.

I look forward to reading more.

Joe LaFratta

Dear Arnold,
I really enjoyed what I read of your story. Father time, dwarfs, and fairies, the perfect combination for magic. I think you’ve got a winner.
Starred and placed in line for the shelf.
Best,
Maria
“Dark of the Moon”

That Indian Summer And The Equilibrium
By Arnold D. Glenpole
This book comes highly starred because of the unique names, stunning imagery, and a rare expectation that seems to creep in now and again. Great song in Chapter 4 and good hooks at the end of each chapter. I like the mood conveyed by Father Time in the opening scenes and the amusing visual of a pixie being shot from Sir Hugh’s sling. Fascinating characters and good dialogue make this book a very interesting read. Well done! Claire ~ Chasing Pharaohs.

i Arnold,

I have given your book a six star rating today, 18-04-11 it deserves to go much higher, I wish you the best fo luck. I have several books on my list, feel free to view them when you can.

All the best.

Keith.

i Arnold,

I have given your book a six star rating today, 18-04-11 it deserves to go much higher, I wish you the best fo luck. I have several books on my list, feel free to view them when you can.

All the best.

Keith.

An intriguing story, but I would suggest you break up your long paragraphs a little. They are a little confusing in parts, but a promising story all the same. Keep it up. Keith. :)

Just a few observations:

format: visually it is better to have spoken words on separate lines as it makes it easier for the reader to follow.
had: you use this word a lot. I have been told that it if you can drop the word had then it is best to do so as it makes the narrative much more immediate.
names: be careful when using names that people may already be famliar with as they have preconceptions that may not match your character

My overall impression was favourable, I would probably read on if there was more to read. :)

I am loving this story. You should contact Nickelodeon and have them do a kids series based on this. This is that good. Such a gifted imagination you possess! This book should do very well. Ill shelve it until another children's book bumps it but I am sure that won't be for a while.

Skater

Hey Arnold, nice read. Simply backed. :-)

jim

How totally wonderful you are, Arnold!! :) Thank you so very much for backing my memoirs/testimony book :) May God richly bless you. :) Love, Susie :) p.s. I have gold ******-rated your book :) - hope you've ****** 'd mine, too. Every ****** -ing & backing more than 24 hours moves our books up authonomy's lists. :) I want to ask you if you could please keep my book on your bookshelf because, I'm #1 on the editor's desk & I don't want to lose traction & to remain in the top 5 to be chosen February 28. :) Please read my profile page: I had a mini-stroke Nov. 10 with slurred speech for an hour & numbness of tongue still & over 24 smaller ones where I couldn't speak since & I"d sure like to cross the finish line of the editor's desk after almost 1 year of trying on authonomy. :) Thank you from the bottom of my heart for helping me :) - I have lost 3 sisters to strokes & my last sister, Mary had 2 heart attacks this past year.

Dear Arnold, I love the intrigue that "Tierra & Earth are on a calamitous course of destruction" & that "only a boy, and a dwarf and a French gypsy and an Indian from New Delhi can save the universe from the dimensions of Diabolos the evil one," "tribes...betrayed by an Arhiman warrior and a sly Foxen," "coming wars," "can the humans and Father Time defeat Diabolos and his followers only time will tell," as your pitch portrays. :) WOW!! What an action-packed story!! :) As ch. 1 begins, Father Time is visiting towns, warning of war which hasn't been for 70 years & amazing that Foxen got his eyesight back from a goddess instead of Father Creator, after 70 years. :) ch.2, "The Book Of "Pelcrum" with the book mark & prophecies of the war...amazing ending of the bag of precious stones. :) I have read & commented on your book & will back it when space opens on my bookshelf. :) I have also gold ******-rated your book :) - could you please ****** mine, too? :) Thank you so much for backing my memoirs/testimony book :) - it would be so nice of you if you'd keep my book on your bookshelf to help me, after my trying for almost a year to be chosen in the top 5 of the editor's desk :) - on 1-1-11, I was #4, but 2 people passed me, so January 31, I ended #6 & I'm now trying to stay in the top 5 to be chosen February 28, so need backings to anchor me in. :) I would so much appreciate your help. :) Love, Susie :) p.s. every ******-ing moves our books up authonomy's lists, as does backing more than 24 hours & the longer on our bookshelves, the more they move up, per authonomy's new rules Oct 2010 :)

Howdy Arnold. Looking forward to reading your work. On my watch list for now. :-)
blessings!

jim
jack & charmian london

You write fantastic, i love the way you describe Father time enter the town of Twin rue.. I was for a moment thinking you were writing about “me” nobody messes with Laila lol the queen of the fairies. The way you write this story almost reminds me of the latest movie “Alice in wonderland” I can rely picture what you are writing. When father time had restored the site of the foxes it indeed reminded me about the story about Samson and Delilah. I love the grace where the only way to restore the eye site is through father the creator. Well done
Laila
PS it would be great if you posted your whole book on here, it is very good

Arnold,

it is quite hard reading a book when starting at chapter 15. The first few chapters of a book as absolutely essential for its success and I feel that you need to up these up here so that you can get good feedback and people can get a feel for you writing.

You have a lot of explaining to do in your text telling us who is who and how they live etc. Can I suggest that you have a look at a slight style change. It's good to have descriptions and give information but try to do it as something is happening. This carries the reader on. So for chapter 15, with the arrival of Father Time, I would have a description of him walking through the streets and the commotion that happens all around him as he moves from place to place with the background sound of the bells reverberating through the houses and cobbled lanes. This will help capture the imagination of the younger child more.

I like your names for you characters and I like the way that, towards the end of your chapter we get more conversation. I would consider adding more talk earlier on in the chapter - perhaps you could have heralds going before Father Time proclaiming in the streets a message calling the people to a gathering and could have the comments of the different people who hear them as the old man journeys through the towm.

Just some thoughts. Take them or leave them as you feel is right for you.

Would be nice I had several consecutive chapters to read so that I could properly get into the book.

If you have some time then please read my book, The Water Works of Clear Wash City which is also a childrens book.

Tim

Hi. Fantasy is not my cup of tea and I only had time to read short passages, enough to like and back it. I’ll try to come back for more and a in depth commentary. Tell me which chapter you would like me to pay close attention to?
Meantime, could you please check TO KILL A DEAD MAN?
Thanks.
Dan

:) I will comment on your book as soon as I have read it - read & commented on 1 day later :)