Book Jacket

 

rank 1300
word count 51379
date submitted 28.06.2011
date updated 08.10.2011
genres: Historical Fiction, Science Fiction...
classification: moderate
incomplete

The Demon's Door Bolt; a Tale of End-Time Panic as a Prelude to the Total Absence of EVERYTHING

A.J. Campbell

Hell's Gates are open, and Daemon prepares for Armageddon. World leaders consider it rumor, and only a bumbling Magus and handicapped warriors can save Earth.

 

The Earth's Door Bolt in Hyperboria has been breeched. The year is 499, the gates of Hell are open as Daemon prepares to conceive the Antichrist and bring his minions to the Upperworld. The major empires-- Rome and Persia-- believe the opening of Hell's gate is a fantastic rumor. Only Prester John and his Grail Warriors are left to fight the Prince of Darkness.

But there's a slight problem. Prester John panics and resurrects five handicapped warriors. The sixth warrior is chained to the Rock of Prometheus, and the prophesized seventh warrior has yet to be found.

The water-clock is running dry! Can the Grail Warriors and steppe barbarians "kill" ten million dead guys and save the World? Maybe... with a little help from Mungo the Obvious, the Machina ex Deus, plus Raphael Jabar and his twenty-seventh Thirteenth Yurt.

The Demon's Door Bolt is complete at 99K (give or take a small k)
If you need more chapters, contact me.

 
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demons, flying gryphons, handicapped warriors, shrinking cosmos, sun tzu, swords, the avars, the devil, uther pendragon

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Chapters

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Chapter 10: Signs of an Unforeseen Circumstance

 

The surviving Moron ran along the goat path, peering over cliff-edge and looking for his brothers down in the sweeping river. They do not swim very well. He stopped running, looked ahead to ruptured chains and no Ekhida, turned around, surveyed where he came from, and decided, I think everyone has disappeared. He then clanked his way down the path through the Demon’s Door Bolt, and ran past his one remaining brother standing against the inner wall. Stopping quickly, he turned back and flipped his brother’s switch.

“What time is it?” asked the other Moron.

“Early afternoon,” he returned.

“What is happening?”

Ekhida and four brothers are missing.”

“Where did they go?”

Moron hesitated, looked outside, and droned, “Over the cliff.”

“Is that bad?”quizzed his brother.

“I think so,” Moron affirmed, “What should we do?”

Push  the alarm button,” his brother declared.

Moron shuffled to the first step of the stairway, ran a finger along the wall, studying the signs over three alarm buttons as his brother caught up with him. Over the signs, a much larger one proclaimed, “SIGNS OF A SIGN ARE THE SIGN.” The left sign read FIRST LEVEL, the middle one SECOND LEVEL, and the right button was marked THIRD LEVEL. A smaller sign under the buttons read, PRESS ONLY IN EMERGENCY. Moron stood perplexed. Is this an emergency or is it just a non-emergency? And so he asked his brother, “What is an emergency, anyway?

The second Moron paused and replied, “A sign of an unforeseen circumstance calling for immediate action. A missing Amazon and four missing brothers are all signs.

Moron pondered, “Have I seen signs of an unforeseen circumstance?”

“Yes. Five, just like these signs, and he pointed to them.

“Then, these signs are signs of an unforeseen circumstance. Which button do we push?

His brother scratched the top of his head with a forefinger, “If these signs are all signs of a sign, we press all three.”

·         *     *     *     *

ARUUUGHH!ARUUUGHH!ARUUUGHH!

“What in Hell is that?” screamed Corax of Syracuse, the First Level Praefect. He’d been down here for a thousand years, and never had he heard it. It’s the frigging alarm! As the inventor of legal verbiage and Daemon’s lawyer, he had composed Hell’s official signs in proper double-speak, each sign explaining correct protocol and identification, including additional signs over the EMERGENCY alarm buttons—such as the SIGNS OF A SIGN sign—for in a real emergency, as opposed to a non-emergency, procedures following the first mentioned emergency had to be spelled out equivocally and perfectly clear, the whole intent of avoiding confusion, otherwise a false alarm could occur, disrupting any one of the three levels, or in fact all three, in which case he himself might have to implement the proper modus operandi—like Right NOW!

 Having written it, he knew the contingency from the Praefect’s Manual. Arm every able-bodied man and scramble them to the Upper World. Something like this could mean an explosion in the lower levels, the shock-wave rising up the stairwell, wiping out all signs of the dead, the non-living, and even the signs themselves. There goes my career as a sign painter and lawyer. Corax the Crow—I was the best. Could get an axe-murderer off with a wrist slap, bribe impeachable judges, suck-up to the nastiest tyrants, and paint the best legally-confusing signs. Now what?  It’s herding a bunch of felons up six thousand steps!

Daemon ran out from the Front Office, yelling, “What’s going on? He had laid out his evening wardrobe for the great debauchery: his shiny black boots, pin-striped jodhpurs, and piggy jacket. Using a pig’s-bristle brush, the jacket was almost clear of lint when the alarm sounded. The speaker was directly overhead, the noise making him jump and drop the jacket to the floor. Son of a frigging bitch! The damned thing is filthier than when I started.

·         *     *     *     *

On the Second Level, Attila the Hun ran along the corridor, screaming, “Break open the Weapon Lockers! All killers and murderers arm yourselves. Pickpockets, diseased whores, and pig-pokers stand aside!”After fifty years of complete boredom as Second Level Praefect, something was happening up Topside and he was ready this time, no over-drinking, no screwing sneaky bitches. Attila always wore his armor, just in case. Now where in Hell is that Sword of Power? I left it here somewhere, right after stabbing that ass-kissing Goth.

·         *     *     *     *

Haman the Agagite sprang to his feet, rubbing his neck. The rope-burns never quite healed, now compounded by heat rash, cancers, and pustules. The Third Level was so hot he no longer wore clothes, the luxury of a tunic and trousers a distant memory. As the alarm sounded, he ran from the Watch Room bellowing, “Floor Supervisors to the Main Hall! Now! He beat his way through the solid mass of killers with an iron prod, some snarling, baring remaining teeth, others yelling, “Piss off!” A few tried to grab him as he beat them to the hot subsurface. The alarm had never sounded before, so he knew this was some type of cataclysm within an Upper Level or the Surface. He screamed sardonically as his eyes rolled, Yes! Now I can continue my original plan—exterminating Israelites, especially Mordecai and that two-faced Esther. Ooo-a, ha ha, hah!” And he wiped slaver from his chin.

Treaders abandoned the Wheel of Pain, and the Vertical Lift was forgotten as supervisors ran into the Hall, all nude and milling about, searching each other’s eyes as they shoved the deranged and dangerous. Intense heat and untold years appeared in their physicality as open sores and hunched backs. And a rotting blackness, dry and flaking, clung to their limbs from a sulfurous gas seeping up from the earth’s core, smelling like brimstone.

“Listen up!” Haman shouted, “The Emergency siren means one thing. We are beginning the War for the Worlds. You all know what we are dealing withmarching Rot-Brains, all dangerous, demented killers, and crazed arsonists. That’s why all the weapons are stored on the Second Level. Use your flails often, keep them moving up the stairwell. This will not be easy! A hundred mile climb with no rest periods.”

“How long will it take?” quizzed Supervisor Sulla.

“The Praefect’s Manual states five to six days, but there were less maniacs down here when it was written. Look at this place! Rot-Brains packed like anchovies in a barrel. The worst are the older ones, the heavy-browed cavemen. They still have comprehension problems.

·         *     *     *     *

The river rolled past Amanirena, muddy brown and deep, yet she could not find any visible sign of Galen, Czaba, or the Amazon. She saw them leap from the cliff above the Door Bolt, and then they vanished underwater as a singular splash. Too many moments passed, and she feared the powerful current swept them downriver. The Ural was huge, far larger than she had imagined; and for anyone to swim it safely appeared impossible. In desperation she left the horses behind, running downstream along the rocky shoreline.

Amanirena!” someone shouted at her back.

She turned around and found Galen standing near the readied mounts. He leaned forward, his hands placed upon knees as he gasped for breath. Trying to stand upright, he coughed, and she realized he had almost drowned: he Galen, a good swimmer! She paced over the rocks, all rounded and some slippery, trying to get back to him.

“Have you seen Czaba? Ekhida?” he gasped between coughs.

“No!” she blurted, “The river carries too much power, and eddies form whirlpools.”

He nodded, leaning upon his knees again. After a moment, he raised his head; and a brightness of recognition flashed in his expression, “Here he comes. Downriver.”

She turned around. Two hundred paces downstream, Czaba was leaping along the rocks, coming their way with Ekhida draped over his shoulder like a sack of wheat. How can he do that! Run upon such a difficult surface. For a man who refused to be the seventh warrior, he was a living, running, anomaly. She turned from his approach, running past Galen to grab a blanket draped over a horse’s saddle, then returning to water-edge. As the powerful Magyar reached her, Amanirena declared, “Quick. Wrap her in this, for the water is nearly freezing.”

“Tell me about it,” he shot back, laying the Amazon down carefully as Amanirena tucked the wool material around her. He knelt to them, “Pray to the gods she makes it.” Ekhida appeared pale, she breathing shallow.

“She’s cold, exhausted, and unconscious at the moment,” the Nubian affirmed.

Galen stood upright again, waving a hand toward the cliffs, “They’ll be pouring out of that Black Hole like hornets to a man’s balls.” He breathed deeply, finally retrieving his breath, “We’ve got to ride fast. Want me to carry her?”

Concern lined Czaba’s expression, “Not on your life. She’s light, and I’m pumped. I told you I had an agenda, and this is part of it.

Amanirena looked up to him. What an odd statement.

·         *     *     *     *

The lumps upon Daemon’s temple throbbed, his eyes cutting like steel through flesh as he grilled the two Morons. Again addressing the second, “You saw all the signs of an emergency. And then you perceived the bright idea of pushing every button you could touch. Correct?”

“Yes,” droned the Moron, “On the wall, I saw five signs of an unforeseen circumstance requiring immediate attention. They were all signs of a sign.

Daemon gave him a hard stare. Unbelievable! The Moron acted correctly for an incorrect reason. He turned back to the first Moron, “So two men ran across the bridge, killed your brothers, and stole Ekhihda; is that it?”

“Yes,” the machine agreed, “Two men with bows and a sword. They kicked my brothers into the river.

In ten long strides, he stepped outside, standing next to the All-Seeing Eye. It took him a half hour to sprint up the stairway, followed by an equally long tantrum. Yet now he was calm and calculating. Whoever they were, the raiders were halfway back to the steppe. Four Morons washed downriver, all traces of them gone! Somehow, two men figured out how to render them inoperable; and if I cannot find out how, I’m going to lose more of my investment.

With them went the Amazon! He could always send a lackey to the Hyperborians or Magyars and kidnap a concubine; but that woman would be weaker and less intelligent. He needed Ekhida. She killed Achilles in a single shot! And Homer—that  lying sack of shit—pinned the deed on Paris. The damned Greeks. They never could acknowledge the truth: a woman killed their greatest hero. She had more grit than ten men, the perfect mother of the Anti-Christ.

He had to calm himself, think clearly. The alarm had been sounded on all three levels, and this was it, no turning back. Daemon projected the scenario. At the moment, Corax the Crow kept the Upper Level crowd where they were. But in three to four days, Attila and all his Second Level thugs would reach the upper one. In six to eight days, Haman’s slavering Rot-Brains would pack into the stairwell and reach the First Level. All of them—the whole damned lot—might turn upon each another, hacking their numbers to dwindling returns. The only solution was immediate action. He would bring First Level combatants Topside and present a challenge to the Magyars and whoever these Moron destroyers were. A stalling tactic. Yes a one-on-one contest to see who keeps Ekhida. It might work; and even if his champion lost, what difference would it make? He was Daemon! And his word of honor was totally worthless.

Chapters

11

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Shelby Z. wrote 305 days ago

The Demon's Door Bolt by A.J. Campbell.
This book is very interesting tale and a unique one.
There isn't much to say, but that the book is very well written and the story is well thought out. No flaws in this well crafted story.
Good work.

Shelby Z./Driving Winds

P.S. Please take a look at my pirate adventure Driving Winds.

Mithun Kalaga wrote 364 days ago

Terrific plot...The beginning of the book is quite marvellous!!!

Bryn Hammond wrote 502 days ago

I bought the book on Amazon; I read it in three days; it's glorious and means a lot to me, steppe-freak that I am. I'll say more in other venues. - Bryn

Update: I've written 1184 words of comment, or billet-doux, on Goodreads. Big for these pages? Go see it there, it's a great site.

X the Unknown33 wrote 548 days ago

hey, not sure if u remember me but we had a comment swap agreement . . . uh . . .LMS, i think 'bout 2 months ago.
anyways, i've read 2 chaps and & i'll have 2 be honest with u, its doesn't quite take the cake 4 me, individually.
But how u introduced your story in the PRO was intriguing. Mystical. And these -in lack of a better word- hints of this going to somehow end up an end days story in historical fiction is COOL.
GL Warrior ;)

X

Su Dan wrote 619 days ago

fascinating book, though l must read more...l shall back if l like...
read SEASONS...

Steppe Warrior wrote 668 days ago

Mr. Campbell,

Thanks for stealing the basic premise of the Roadrunner and Coyote. You can look forward to a law-suit.

Most seriously,
Chuck Jones

Steppe Warrior wrote 671 days ago

Really enjoyed reading the first chapter. You set the mood up well and intrigue the reader. I'm not a huge fan of this kind of fantasy writing but this is written really well and very cleanly. I can imagine this doing really well in its genre. I particularly enjoyed the characterisation of the main female character. Good luck with the novel!



Sarah,
I've been away from the internet for 2 days, just getting back. Thanks for backing the Demon's Door Bolt. What I've posted has actually been cleaned up, but in a 5.25 X 8 Createspace format. In the tale, there are actually more female warriors than males. Glad you enjoy. It's not on many bookshelves because I'm not good at huckstering it. I'll get back to your story either tonight or tomorrow.

best,
A.J.

Ariom Dahl wrote 672 days ago

I started looking at several books on the site yesterday, and found this one to be delightfully off beat. Giving you a good star rating and continuing to read. I see previous comments have included the words 'quirky' and 'tongue-in-cheek' and that's how I found it, too. Maybe when you edit you could get rid of a few exclamation marks, but otherwise it reads well, with an individual style.

sarahdalton wrote 673 days ago

Really enjoyed reading the first chapter. You set the mood up well and intrigue the reader. I'm not a huge fan of this kind of fantasy writing but this is written really well and very cleanly. I can imagine this doing really well in its genre. I particularly enjoyed the characterisation of the main female character. Good luck with the novel!

Steppe Warrior wrote 677 days ago


You mentioned something about Buddha debating with the butcher about the price of pig. Is this a reference to some text? I imagine that Buddha being a vegetarian wouldn't do that.



Olefish, thanks for the comment. I have to use the ao voice due to the large number of characters in this story, on Topside, Hell, Heaven, and Purgatory. The voice varies, sometimes distant and close. Sakyamuni was fairly eclectic in his choice of foods, and his last meal included pork... just the opposite tastes from the Judeans. :)

olefish wrote 677 days ago

I like the amalgamation of mythologies here. It is rather creative. Your use of the omni-pov is also well done. I worry a bit about the rambling quality of the narrative. Even though the narrative voice is interesting, it does remove me further away from the characters

You mentioned something about Buddha debating with the butcher about the price of pig. Is this a reference to some text? I imagine that Buddha being a vegetarian wouldn't do that.

Steppe Warrior wrote 681 days ago

Well, A.J., you did a fairly good job on this one.
As always, your friend,
Giovanni Boccaccio

Sorry. Not enough whining. I caught a bigger fish than you did. So there!
Ernest Hemingway

Needs a little more moralizing. Other than that, I'll read into the second paragraph.
As always,
Dante Allegeri

So what if I described a stone house on one page and said it was wooden on another.
I'm more famous than you are. And I have more dust on my boots. Take a hike.
William Faulkner

AntoinetteBergin wrote 684 days ago

This book is wonderful. The author recommended I read Chapter 4, which I did, and it was comical and beautifully written. So I couldn't resist starting over from the beginning. If you could see me, you would see that I am recommending this book as hard as I can. It's quite straining, really, but it's worth it.

Steppe Warrior wrote 689 days ago

Back to you, Al

I've cleaned up the openers, got the dashes in, and dumped the reduntant "sagely." The fifty-pound draw I had wrangled with before, everything else becoming longer and clunkier, so I left it. Barbarian societies delt in commodites, gems and tin, along with breeding and trading horses, and I figured they could weigh things to the ounce.

I know the style is quirky, not English 101, but it flows-- what you called "word building." I'll drive an editor crazy but the reader is better off for it. A lot in this ms is unconventional, including a large number of reversed anacronyms, espressions like "anal retentive" and "manic depressive." You just don't do that in a historical setting. (But you don't place science fiction in the ancient past, either.) At first I worried, but after two or three dozen, the anomalies became hilarious. And not one reader has mentioned they crush the fictional dream.

Thanks for the read; your input is correct and valuable.

A.J.

CarolinaAl wrote 689 days ago

I read your prologue and first chapter.

General comments: An interesting start. Likable main characters. Thought-provoking narrative. Lyrical prose. Clever wit. Awesome world building. Atmospheric. Vivid imagery. Not a lot of tension in what I read so far. Good pacing.

Specific comments on the prologue:
1) You let me know in your message that you occassionally intentionally punctuate narrative preceding dialogue with a comma, so I'll not point those out to you.
2) You also occassionally don't capitalize the first word of narrative sentences following dialogue. With your writing background, I assume that is intentional as well.
3) ' ... when finished it had a fifty pound draw.' This would imply an advanced capacity to measure 'pull' accurately. That's not something I would have expected to find in a bow and arrow society. But, I'll accept this important piece of information as part of your world building.
4) "The symbol represents good fortune. Something you need," she sagely replied. Try to be careful with adverbs. In this case, the dialogue seems wise. As a result, 'sagely' reads redundant to me.

Specific comments on the first chapter:
1) "What if I refuse?" smirked the Horsebreaker. A 'smirk' is a facial expression. You can't 'smirk' dialogue.
2) "I know it carries all the sharp toys you think you need. Put a closing quote mark after 'need.'
3) Hyphenate 'twenty four.'
4) 'He nephew stood puzzled before him.' 'He' should be 'his.'
5) Hyphenate 'self defense.'
6) Excellent end of chapter hook. Who wouldn't turn the page after reading that line?

I hope this critique helps your further polish your all important opening pages. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest.

Have a splendid day.

Al

drbeshears wrote 691 days ago

I started on your book today; have only just begun, but I'm definitely being drawn in. Looking forward to going back in. Thanks - David (Climb the Mountain).

D M Sharples wrote 691 days ago

I like this, it has a quirky style, giving it a casual feel which is juxtaposed to the seriousness of the events the characters are facing. Sometimes I feel as though a sentence here and there isn't quite correct, but at the same time I don't know whether I'm right in thinking so or whether it's intentional.

The humour is subtle at times, blatent at others and always welcome.

I feel I would benefit greatly from having a much better knowledge of Asian history, as some of the references are lost on me. However this doesn't really detract from the overall experience.

I think there are some minor issues with punctuation around dialogue tagging, but nothing a light edit wouldn't fix.

Overall this is a good piece of work that draws the reader in nicely, welcomes them (while perhaps pulling faces behind their back) and trots along at a pace which is pleasant and interesting. I shall be reading more.

D M Sharples.

Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 693 days ago

A.J.,
"The Demon's Door Bolt" with its impressive cast of characters headed by Prester John on one side and Daemon on the other, was to me like a fictional approximation of events leading to the Battle of Armageddon, the Final Showdown. An undercurrent of tongue-in-cheek humour especially in the dynamic between the hero Galen and his centuries-old immortal ex-wife Ekhida, still a virgin, flavoured your meticulous narrative well. Thank you so much for the compelling read.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

Steppe Warrior wrote 694 days ago

This is a very interesting story. I like the historical richness that is woven into each piece of the story creating a dense web of facts and images. I have only read through Chapter 1, but I look forward to continuing on when time permits me.
Best wishes,
PJ Daley - Birth of the Warrior



Thanks for the comment, Paul

Yes, the story incorporates historical background into a sci-fi tale. We have righteous personages from the past (the resurrected) fighting evil ones from the past (those from Hell) within a story set in a slightly more recent past. This approach-- affixing sci-fantasy into our own human past, our historical background-- is a new concept. At least I think it is.

The DDB is actually my fifth novel, the previous ones (all epic in scale) being "practice." In essence, it has taken me almost 15 years to finalize the single book that is correct. When it happens, you know it. A voice says, "This is IT!" I posted this tale on June 28th and it's now ready to crack below the 300 mark. It's not on that many bookshelves, but the comments are encouraging, some readers asking for the entire ms (which I send via email as a PDF).

The difference in age between you and I is more than 50 years, but we stir the same cauldron. I'm glad to see you've posted your first novel. Brave. You have grit; and the story-line is a rather good one for young adult. Charlie is much like my Galen, both smaller men yet having wit and speed. Keep writing and rewriting. It's the only way to excell. I wrote nonfiction for 40 years and developed decent writing habits, became the top in my field. I gave it all up to write one good novel.

If I might: your Harris says, "Well, yea I have many dreams Charlie...." The word "yea" is rather Biblical, like Jesus speaking, "Yea, I say unto you, Paul. Do not use yea when you can use yuh."

"Flow" to me is important, almost subliminal yet it connects and allows the reader to read faster. When a person is the subject of a paragraph and then speaks, connect the two together. I believe it's tighter that way. Whatever you do, don't give up, just write and then write again in a slightly different way until it becomes "right."

At the moment, my bookshelf is full. These authors need to be there because they have something important to say at the Editor's Desk. I'll read more of your's, hopefully backing BOTW in the future. Likewise, if you do continue reading mine, then appraise it and give it as many stars as you see fit.

We will stay in touch,
A.J. Campbell

PJ Daley wrote 694 days ago

This is a very interesting story. I like the historical richness that is woven into each piece of the story creating a dense web of facts and images. I have only read through Chapter 1, but I look forward to continuing on when time permits me.
Best wishes,
PJ Daley - Birth of the Warrior

Steppe Warrior wrote 696 days ago

I like what I have read so far. There is a real flavour of the passage of time in it and many colourful images and I aim to read moore soon. I find your narrative style easy to follow and the story just flows as a result. I think you will go really far with this. I think everyone has preconceptions and fears about the world ending and not necessarily rooted in the Bible..."

Hello Melanie,

Thanks for reading part of the DDB. Frankly, I have no idea where this fluid style came from. I have been writing for 40 years, and then suddenly!-- something that might mimic the profluency of Homer if we could read him in original Greek. I agree that the End of Times doesn't specifically relate to the Bible. In the tale, my characters (especially later with Galen the Physician) actually question the very existance of God and even the human soul. He puts it this way (speaking through an omnipotent voice)-- "We are what we believe we are."

I'm proud of the DDB. It sends an important message in such a subtle and humorous way. Yet it's a message we particularly need in this day and age. It let's us know that all of us have a potential for greatness, even the humble and poor. Although the landscape is foreign (the steppes), much like another planet, the characters are us, we humans who can rise above handicaps, mental of physical.

Not many people are reading this tale. It sits on only 14 shelves. But I thank you for what you've read and hope you might read more. If you can give it a high star rating, that would help.

Again, thanks so much
A.J.

Steppe Warrior wrote 696 days ago

THE DEMON'S DOOR BOLT (Part Two)
A. J. Campbell

Nine hours later and I have finished reading all you have given me. I was right after reading the first chapter. This is a brilliant piece of work. I am really speechless with awe over what you have accomplished. Threading in the entities of the past, done with delicious humor and subtlety makes of this a libretto so finely tuned it overcomes the reader. I just felt as if I could not stop reading. I laughed out loud so many times throughout. I congratulate you on this accomplishment of world building.

I would love to read more. I'll send you my e mail address if you would allow me to take you up on your offer.

Sincerely,

Mary Enck
A King in Time



Hello Mary,

First, I was beginning to wonder if anyone had actually read the DDB chapters I posted. And second, thank you so much for your kindness. I wanted to produce a tale (not really a "story") that combined the best of old legends, the best of what we humans could be, and then transfer these qualities into an artifical brain that believes it's alive.

By now, you're aware of how much of the Arthurian legend surfaces in this story, especially Uther who first comes across as a yarn-spinning old man. Most male characters are elderly, and the physical prowess is given to the women-- Ekhida, Vishpala, Valeriana, and Amanirena. I don't know if you've met Mungo the Obvious and his "royal family" yet; but this is a raising of the humble and poor to a heroic status. I'm very proud of this novel because it carries a fine message in such a humorous way.

I had no friends here on Authonomy (other than perhaps Jack Cerro), but I'm pleased to find another Arthurian buff. I've spent more than a decade trying to connect Arthur with a possible historical background. Much of the Legend appears to come from the steppes (the Grail, the sword in the stones, and especially Merlin). That's why I wrote Forging the Blade. But the DDB has real potential, a novel we humans particularly need at this point in time.

I would love to have you finish reading the novel. Send your email address to me at steppe.warrior@gmail.com and I will return a finished PDF. This is the "almost final" version. I'm accepting input and pulling typos until around the fist of Aug. When I finish the cover, the whole thing goes to Createspace. Thank you for backing it, especially since it's only on 14 bookshelves. Why it has risen steadily in the ranks, I have no idea.

Most sincerely,
A.J.

PS: Oh! By the way, I appear to be "online" all the time. I just don't check in and out... because I've forgotten my what-cha-ma-call-it. I'm penning from my work computer, and the my laptop with the PDF is at home.

Sharahzade wrote 696 days ago

THE DEMON'S DOOR BOLT (Part Two)
A. J. Campbell

Nine hours later and I have finished reading all you have given me. I was right after reading the first chapter. This is a brilliant piece of work. I am really speechless with awe over what you have accomplished. Threading in the entities of the past, done with delicious humor and subtlety makes of this a libretto so finely tuned it overcomes the reader. I just felt as if I could not stop reading. I laughed out loud so many times throughout. I congratulate you on this accomplishment of world building.

I would love to read more. I'll send you my e mail address if you would allow me to take you up on your offer.

Sincerely,

Mary Enck
A King in Time

Sharahzade wrote 696 days ago

THE DEMON'S DOOR BOLT
A. J. Campbell

Ah the gods must be guiding your gift for telling such a wonderous story. I long for the innocence of a land such as you describe. A place where one can drink in the essence of nature and bask in the luxury of the scenes you show us. Reading it gave me a sense of peace, contentment, the natural order of life and the simple pleasure of living with honor.

The opening lulled me into a reverie that foreshadows something to come that will displace all that exists at this moment in time. Why I feel that, I cannot say. It is all too perfect and the sort of story that makes me yearn for a time such as this. I believe you inspire courage from the beginning so that what may come will be met with valor.

Call it Fantasy, Science Fiction or just excellent story telling, I love the beginning of this novel and wish it were all here so I could set out on a quest along with you to the end. I intend to read all you have posted but I have seen enough to give you all the stars in my possession and back this beautiful introduction to your story.

With admiration, sincerely,

Mary Enck
A King in Time

Margaret Trevelyan wrote 696 days ago

I like what I have read so far. There is a real flavour of the passage of time in it and many colourful images and I aim to read moore soon. I find your narrative style easy to follow and the story just flows as a result. I think you will go really far with this. I think everyone has preconceptions and fears about the world ending and not necessarily rooted in the Bible. I like the character of Ekhida. She interests me, probably because, like most of us, I sometimes wonder what immortality would be like. Her conversation with the boy was natural and insightful. I will add to my w/l and try and find shelf space in the future. Good luck with it!

Steppe Warrior wrote 706 days ago

This book very Science Ficition. In the message you sent me you said that the book is very dark but give a good meaning or something like that. I agree sometimes things that are dark teaches us meaning about life. Keep up the good work.



Hi Danielle,

Forging the Blade is the "darker" of the two novels, and probably the most straight-forward historically and the more literary. The events actually happened in what is now Rumania. I thank you for putting it on your shelf, the only person who has.

The Demon's Door Bolt is much lighter, sometimes comical, even though it deals with a catastrophic subject. It also flows at a very fast pace. It might be "pulp" fiction, but the message is a good one. This one is ready for publishing; and I am now formatting it into a template for Createspace. I can thank Owen Quinn (here on Authonomy) and my son Jason for urging me on. Work on your own ms, don't give up, and give it all your love.

Most Sincerely,
A.J.

DThomas wrote 708 days ago

This book very Science Ficition. In the message you sent me you said that the book is very dark but give a good meaning or something like that. I agree sometimes things that are dark teaches us meaning about life. Keep up the good work.

Steppe Warrior wrote 709 days ago

It sort of gives me a new refreshed look on Science Fiction. Quite enjoyable. Continue the good work :)



Thanks, AunaJune

The good work needs to be done, simply because the DDB has an important message needed by all of us on this planet. Usually sci-fi dwells on other planets or in the future. I chose an early point in time and on Earth. We find three major dimensions: the Upper World, Hell, and Heaven... plus a fourth, the Purgatory of a self-serving Church. It's all about us, God, machines, and the soul, under the veil of action-adventure. I'm working on it daily. Just an old man's way of speaking the truth.

best,
A.J.

AunaJune wrote 710 days ago

It sort of gives me a new refreshed look on Science Fiction. Quite enjoyable. Continue the good work :)

Steppe Warrior wrote 711 days ago

Very Greek goddish. Like that Percy Jackson, but more sophisticated. Nice job. Dina of Last Degree and Halo of the Damned



BillyS,

Thanks for taking a look at the DDB. It was in the weekly top five until today and then it plummeted. I think someone dropped it from their shelf. A hard racket, this one. My best on yours.

A.J.

billysunday wrote 711 days ago

Very Greek goddish. Like that Percy Jackson, but more sophisticated. Nice job. Dina of Last Degree and Halo of the Damned

billysunday wrote 711 days ago

Very Greek goddish. Like that Percy Jackson, but more sophisticated. Nice job. Dina of Last Degree and Halo of the Damned

Steppe Warrior wrote 713 days ago

I rarely like prologues, but yours is effective. I wonder if all of it is necessary, though? Perhaps a slight trim would strengthen it? I feel your story really kicks off in chapter 1. I think the sooner we get to it, the better.

I usually keep track of suggestions, but I got caught up in the story, I had very few. I suggest limiting your use of exclamation points. There are quite a few in your prologue. You do a good job of avoiding unnecessary adverbs for the most part. Is "quickly" necessary? There were a few others here and there, so always check to make sure they strengthen your narrative. I'm not sure I agree with the science fiction label. It's much more fantasy in my opinion.



Joshua,

Thanks for the suggestions; some already applied. I know the prologue is weaker than chap.1 but I want to keep it. The interaction between Ekhida and the young hunter serves to introduce her and hints of a love interest. She will always think about him until they meet again. The prologue actually saves a lot of verbiage (no setup, no courtship). My goal is to keep this ms under 100,000 words.

It's historical in the presence of current world leaders of the period (year 500), but it gets science-fictiony when we tour Heaven, Purgatory, and Hell, and especially when the one-eyed men appear. I don't want to drop too many spoilers.

Best,
A.J

Joshua Jacobs wrote 713 days ago


Wow. What an imagination you have. It's obvious you've put a ton of thought into your world and the story you've developed. I'm intrigued!

There's a distinct voice in this. I love how it opens. It sets the perfect mood for a legendary story of epic proportion. It's well-executed, too. The sentences are tightly written and flow smoothly together.

My favorite aspect of this novel, though, is the premise. Not only is this the type of novel I love, but it's extremely marketable. I could see this one on bookshelves.

I rarely like prologues, but yours is effective. I wonder if all of it is necessary, though? Perhaps a slight trim would strengthen it? I feel your story really kicks off in chapter 1. I think the sooner we get to it, the better.

I usually keep track of suggestions, but I got caught up in the story, I had very few. I suggest limiting your use of exclamation points. There are quite a few in your prologue. You do a good job of avoiding unnecessary adverbs for the most part. Is "quickly" necessary? There were a few others here and there, so always check to make sure they strengthen your narrative. I'm not sure I agree with the science fiction label. It's much more fantasy in my opinion.

Minor typos: You need a period instead of a comma at the end of "He arose and stood straight." Same with, "She strode closer." This continues almost every time you use dialogue. Only use a comma when you're using a verb related to speech (i.e. said, asked, etc). At the same time, "He shrugged in simple trust" needs to begin with a capital for the same reason. Other than those minor mistakes, this is very well edited.

This is an excellent start, and I look forward to reading more. Highly rated! Great job!

CMTStibbe wrote 716 days ago

The Demon’s Door Bolt is a stunning book. It is so easy to visualize the setting and its unique characters. Master story-tellers and wordsmiths are hard to find especially in this age. I have missed such beautiful writing and authentic dialogue. High stars. This is definitely my type of read. On W/l until space comes available. Claire ~ Chasing Pharaohs.

Steppe Warrior wrote 717 days ago

Hm, AJ, I didn't have a lot of time, but this looks fantastic. I'll read more later - highly rated for now. :)



Monicque,

Thanks for the quick look. The DDB puts women in their place-- right at the kick-ass TOP. I hope you get a chance to start a read, perhaps finding a few laughs. Even Aunt Beatrice (stolen from Dante) wheels her weight around.

best,
A.J.

monicque wrote 717 days ago

Hm, AJ, I didn't have a lot of time, but this looks fantastic. I'll read more later - highly rated for now. :)

mrsdfwt wrote 720 days ago

After reading two chapters of "The Demon's Door Bolt", i came to the conclusion that this is definitely a different read for me, but i love it.
A boy becomes a man and kills a stag to feed many mouths.
A cursed immortal exclaims: 'Men!They're such frigging jerks.'
A horsebreaker wanders in the steppe, although he could live in a palace.
We witness bustling streets, mud-brick tenements, and hucksters pushing their wares.

This is a very challenging read and i must admit i can't wait to read further, although i would recommend copy editing it, especially the prologue.
The command of the English language is exquisite, and being a fan of Mythology in general, i find this read fascinating.
Six stars and placed in line for the shelf.
Maria
Dark of the Moon

viento wrote 722 days ago

Welcome to Authonomy A.J and you've had a great start! Love the pitch - just my sort of book : )

You're book is on my watchlist until I have a little time to give it the attention it deserves.

lizjrnm wrote 722 days ago

WOW! You have one gifted imagination! Cover is eye-catching an dthe pitch sells the book store browser. Id buy it so Im backing it for talented writing and a great storyline. Starred as well.

Liz
The Cheech Room

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