They Call Me Blanca

Christian Critique and Review:

They Call Me Blanca:

Finally, I have found the time to read this exceptional book. Actually its a WOW book. A book about survival, relationships, sacrifice and restoration. A girl who is not sorry for herself, who understands her neighborhood, her homegirls and the guys they hang out with. Already, we care for the quiet Blanca bruised and beaten in a hospital bed because we see a driven individual with great inner strength—a misfit desperate to fit in. One tough chola, she won’t stay down.

Her mother, a firm advocate for Jesus, is so giving, its hard not to feel her pain. She also has a friend in Pastor Mike. The tone of this book is unique; the reader not only reads the book but hears it spoken. I love the language, natural and distinctive. The Spanish overtones are just perfect the way they are, it couldn't be written in any other way.

Chapter 2 had me grinning, make-up, fashion—the descriptions are skillfully crafted and entertaining. And bless little David for giving up his chocolate milk. I have to say, I did shed a tear of joy at this. Priceless. But the abuse in the classroom had me gasping. I was so glad when David's mother comforted a little girl, confused over what she had done wrong. This shows the experience of an author with teaching experience and the love of children. Now David is 6ft 3ins and muscular. I’m not sure what is the matter with Blanca, I would go to church with him in a heartbeat! But she hurts him, a Ms. Sidakis type of hurt.

So many emotions run through this book, it’s hard to put it down. We root for Blanca and we want to know what happens. Each chapter has a hook of its own. Can God save a chola? Find out, you’ll be extremely glad you did. High stars for great storytelling. Claire ~ Chasing Pharaohs

Genius. After reading Chapter 1 alone. I love the mix of Spanish and English. And reading the familiar places in Stockton, it's weird to feel familiarity and fondness for a place I was eager to leave. I was a teacher twenty minutes from Stockton but you capture the teen mind really well.

Bravo!
Alice

One word- AMAZING!! This is one of the best books I have read on Authonomy. I couldn't put this one down. As a student of the Spanish language I enjoyed the mix of Spanglish and the insight into mixed hispanic culture in the U.S. I think this book is powerful and will go far.

Blanca is a deep character. Lost in her heritage in the states, she's just trying to make it day to day in a world she doesn't fit into completely. I really felt for this character. Other characters like David, his mom, Shortie, Cookie, and Nacho are all memorable and sing off the page. Everything is vividly written and jumps off the page. I would love to have this book sitting on my "real" bookshelf. Fantastic piece of literature this one.

Even your blend of spirituality is real and unique. I like real and this is what this book offers from the street crew to Blanca's view of Christians. I love this book!

Best of luck with this one. I've got no criticism for this masterpiece. Backed, starred +, and enjoyed.

-Christian Rogue

Hi Laura! I read the first chapter of "They Call Me Blanca" and all I can say is WOW! Michelina is hands down the coolest character I've read about well...ever. I can't say I can relate to her situation of being a minority though. Living in Florida, there's a never a day I don't come across another Latino. Your writing is so unique too! Spanglish is honestly how I talk all the time, sometimes I start talking English to someone who only speaks English only to accidentally ending up the conversation in Spanish. Anyways, loved the first chapter!

Every now and again I pick up a book and, as I read through it, I feel as though I have died and got into heaven without having to go through the awful business of dying to get there. They Call Me Bianca is one of those books that transports the reader effortlessly to realms of literary enjoyment far beyond mere earthly pleasures.

I sense I will not be alone in according this story much praise. Indeed, praise unstinted: for the quality of writing, scene setting, reflective tone, ambiance and mood. Bianca's character definition is outstanding... There is a distinct assured authorial touch to the narrative with a finessed command and control that holds the reader's appreciative attention from the first paragraph onwards. The internal dynamic and creative tension is consistent throughout the 22 Chapters. Here is Spanish without tears for those none native to the language as it is never intrusive but always complimentary to the text. Seis estrellas - ****** Tony Brady - SCENES FROM AN EXAMINED LIFE - Books 1,2 & 3.

Hi, Laura,

I can see why you have so many backers. Starting from that first line and all chapter 1 there is a unique voice that belongs only to Blanca. Wow, I am impressed. I am hard to impress. I struggle with voice all the time.

I do have a few things I would like to mention. Nothing major.
I think it'll sound better if you take out the ? after the sentence 'where I come from.' because we know the dad was Mexican and the mother is white. So with a period its a statement.---By the way, in the opening you mentioned 'pops was Mexican'...I was iffy if you got the tense verb correct. Then I read he had died in a street brawl (knife) so kudos on getting it correct.
I would kill the word after in the sentence "after a rough night with no sleep.' I felt that something, an explanation was missing because of the use of the word after and no explanation was told.
In the middle a little clairty could be used. She was in the bathroom talking about her friends beating her and suddenly the mother is sitting by the door. Was the bathrrom door open? Or did she hear the mothers mumbling chants seep through the cracks? This pulled me out of the scene.

I have had this book on my shelf for a while. Weeks even, trying to write you this feedback and I thought I had. I'm sorry. I like this story --I connected and look forward t reading more. Honest. You do have something here worth publishing. I grew up in Chicago's west side. What you describe with the mixes of races and the friends beatings, I have seen it with my older cousins in gang rituals. So this, to me, is a realistic YA story.

Nancy Lopez
Backward Glances
--Highly starred--

Hi Laura,
Cara recommended your book to me and I'm really enjoying it so far. Your writing style is crisp and the plot moves along well. I particularly like the setting and characters - all very believable, giving us a good blend of realism with fantasy.
6 stars and I'll have you on my shelf soon
Dan

Hi, a long and detailed story.It is very sad at times and full of activities together with incidents.
Goood phrases of spanish language. It will be great read for those know spanish as we as English.
It is a big book that you wrote.
It is emotioanl throughout.
Good work for writing iit. Rated and backed for you.

Your story's very good. The writing is clear and makes the reader visualize each scene. I'm giving it six stars. I hope you'll come by to read Stopped Cold, my teen sports mystery. I'd love it if you could comment, star it, watch list or back it.

{They Call Me Blanca} – Laura A. Diaz

This book reads like a Latino dance; catchy, fast-paced, and flowing with the beauty of all Diaz’s original and refreshing descriptions.

The book opens well, establishing the protagonist and weaving in background information without the reader even realising. The school scenes are depicted in detail making the reader feel a part of them, and I particularly enjoyed the characterisation of the different students. Michelina’s voice is also well handled, and the infusion of Spanish words adds a unique touch.

Some elements of this book reminded me of Margaret Atwood’s “Cat’s Eye” – particularly the ‘Whatever.’ lines, and the acute attention to detail in the descriptions of characters; like Diaz is conveying a vivid, colourful painting, through her words.

The brutal bullying scene was so realistic and we really feel like we are there with Michelina. Then, the cliff-hanger ending of chapter 5 after Michelina is beaten up and hears the voice “Not yet. You have much to learn.” is absolutely terrific.

I thoroughly enjoyed the twist of Michelina waking up in another body – and the transition is so smooth that I think even readers who aren’t a fan of supernatural ideas will thoroughly enjoy it.

I loved the delicate balance in this book; it is original and an excellent blend of many things. I have rated 6 stars and will keep on my watch-list for further reading. Well done and thank you for such an enjoyable read!

Cara

Found this book on the shelf of someone else I backed. ON THE STRENGTH OF ONE CHAPTER (SO FAR) CONSIDER YOURSELF BACKED. DANG sorry about the caps. will let you know when I've read further but what I look for here is writing that grabs me. Yours did that so you be one of my first shelf full.

Laura:

They Call Me Blanca, is a work of art. You tell the story without pretense. It iexposes the core of a person. I love that. I found myself smiling at the language you so easily use - it's like hearing you talk. You really are telling a story - and that fact leaps off the page. When 'she' says: "... this church-thing, and this Jesus - thing", I can almost "see" her saying it. Blanca's attitude is so well conveyed. The reader ends up with such a real sense of who she is, who she has to be. I have only finished chapters 1 and 2; but will definitely read more. Also, I will keep "Blanca" on my bookshelf for a while longer. I'd like to see her rise!

KitKat7 (Ashara: Like Corns on My Toes)

They Call Me Blanca: Fantastic book, Laura. Don't give up - this is a real winner. I put it on my watchlist and will soon move it to my bookshelf. I've a full bookshelf now and want to leave the books there for 24 hours, but your book is next up! Blessings, Pat

This is without doubt the most pleasurable book I have encountered for a long time, I will give you loads of stars and all that and recommend etc and I've already shelved you I believe. I'm quite addicted to this kind of realism in writing, as you probably noticed in my one. I love to hear people talk in their regional accents or dialects/ colloquilisms. If there is anyone on this site that I would wish to meet, It would be you. This was a pleasure to read. Highly recommended.
It's been a great pleasure to read your story. My best wishes...Trev

It is beyond my understanding as to why your book keeps getting this red arrow, dear friend. No matter what, however, you may trust that it will remain on my shelf as long as you wish me to have it there.
I wish you an enjoyable Friday!
Carmi

Would you be so kind as to send me this to my email. I've just completed chapter two and I'm thoroughly enjoying it and I don't have a constant internet access. I did enjoy the plethora of Spanish colloquilisms dropped in here and there. Gives the story a lovely feel to it.

Trev@ireland.com

Laura,
A mestiza Latina acting out her insecurities, trying to do the right thing while trying to fit in with cholas, contradictions that tear at her insides. Typical growing pains? Absolutely. Teen-agers go through identity crises all the time and so does Michelina, which means she's normal. Ergo, we can all relate. Your narrative is passionate and full of local color, your dialogue engaging with its Spanish asides. Thank you so much for the entertaining read.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

Really enjoying this, will be backing when I have some space! High stars for now though!

I love that you don't just use first person, you ahve Blanca speak directly to the reader. Breaching the fourth wall, so to speak. It brings an intimacy to the narration which I think is important for anyone (like me!) who is unfamilier with this world. We have a guide.

The little drops of Spanish work well - you don't need to speak the language to understand what she means, and it adds to the authenticity. I've seen a lot of books about dangerous highschools, gang violence and race but its unusual to get one from the female perspective. I'll be checking back in with this!

Few new novels that I've read have pulled me in so immediately as this book! The author's "voice", the clarity of her thoughts, and her use (but not overuse) of Spanish feels really authentic. The mother-daughter realtionship appears spot-on, and the conflicts of a light-skinned Hispanic girl in Stockton (which I've visited) ring true. And I say all this having only read the first page! This book has a definite "WOW" factor and follows in the place of such classics as The Woman Warrior. I'm pleased to rate this 6 stars.

Cybtrans77

Hi I look forward to reading your book I have put on my watchlist, would appreciate your comments on Be The Human Sunbeam Blessings Clare :)

Even though this type of book is not exactly the genre I like to read, it did hold my attention with it's excellent writing style. You are very good with description and you did hold my attention. I'll be coming back to read more.

Permac
The Eyes of Tokorel

Started reading this, good so far!

AAAAHHHHHH....Laura I just finished...I read the whole thing in one afternoon and NEED to know what happens. I even went on Amazon to see if you were maybe published yet...PLEASE send me the last chapters!!! Carrie

AAAAHHHHHH....Laura I just finished...I read the whole thing in one afternoon and NEED to know what happens. I even went on Amazon to see if you were maybe published yet...PLEASE send me the last chapters!!! Carrie

AAAAHHHHHH....Laura I just finished...I read the whole thing in one afternoon and NEED to know what happens. I even went on Amazon to see if you were maybe published yet...PLEASE send me the last chapters!!! Carrie

You've got an incredible story here. I was very impressed. Michelina one of the greatest characters I've read on this site and your writing style is very vivid and entertaining. Your make the reader feel thoroughly immersed in the culture that your character inhabits. I also particularly enjoyed the way you mix both english and spanish through the novel, since I speak both english and spanish I was very comfortable reading it and I'm sure it wouldn't bother people who speak only english. All in all, I think this a very good book and I think it'll go very far.

Good Luck,
Roy Earle.

Laura, this is an excellent book! You've done an amazing job of developing your characters, and making them likable/lovable even in their unlovable states:) I can't imagine this not getting published. I would recommend a final read through/edit for punctuation. The misplaced commas distract from the story and you italicize the nicknames sometimes which is also a bit distraction. That is the only thing this needs to be publish perfect. LOVE IT!!
Carrie

Laura, this is an excellent book! You've done an amazing job of developing your characters, and making them likable/lovable even in their unlovable states:) I can't imagine this not getting published. I would recommend a final read through/edit for punctuation. The misplaced commas distract from the story and you italicize the nicknames sometimes which is also a bit distraction. That is the only thing this needs to be publish perfect. LOVE IT!!
Carrie

Laura, this is an excellent book! You've done an amazing job of developing your characters, and making them likable/lovable even in their unlovable states:) I can't imagine this not getting published. I would recommend a final read through/edit for punctuation. The misplaced commas distract from the story and you italicize the nicknames sometimes which is also a bit distraction. That is the only thing this needs to be publish perfect. LOVE IT!!
Carrie

First I have to say I love the idea of mixing the English and Spanish, it really works.
This is a book that really inspires. It must be difficult for any child who is born mixed race, especially living in a comunity where she feels almost alone in her race. The thought puts me in mind of the Catherine Cookson 'Colour Blind.'
Of course this situation is in reverse and she is white, not black, but the idea is the same.
The reader becomes very close to 'Blanca' in the first chapter, and we feel her pain and and suffering and great drive. She has a strength inside her and she is so desperate to fit in with her friends. I hope she manages it with God's help.
Lots of stars
Junetee(Four Corners)

Not my normal choice of book, but what really appealed was that it was written in the first person, and actually showed the female world in a macho light. I'd read it, but I reckon I'd have to pry it from the nearest woman's grip.

Mantén la fe!
Ben

A very interesting story Laura. I can imagine many people identifying with this and have no doubt that it will be popular. You have a personable style of writing which is descriptive and immediate. Well done and good luck with all your future writing.
Uncas

I read most of the first chapter, and was quite impressed. Although this type of book really isn't my personal cup of tea, I appreciate the effort you take to write it in the very specific and particular voice of your main character. It is all too believable, and undoubtedly will touch the sympathetic hearts of many. Well done, and keep on.

gripping and compelling story, wow...I cant stop reading.

backed n recommended

I loved the edginess of your main character! Really well done, exceptional writing. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.
Best,
Heather
Catching Faith

I really like your characterisation of Blanca, sympathetic but not self-pitying. Really well done. Great writing. An entertaining read. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this.
Best,
Melissa,
Lessons in the Dark

Unusual and compelling - I read several chapters of this book and was drawn into it almost against my will! I didn't like reading chapter 5 with all the gruesome detail but just had to read on to see what happened! Very interesting with the mix of English and Spanish. I love that as I can speak some Spanish so this made the book even more interesting for me.

You have skilfully interwoven the message of Jesus into the book which is fantastic. Chapter 1 sets the scene 'you know if there really is a God (which I tend to doubt a lot these days) I don't see how He can let things like that happen.' and then Blanca's mother - 'been on this Jesus-kick for a few years now.' That grabbed my attention and I wanted to read on which I did! I even skipped to the epilogue only to see that there wasn't one!!!

Great writing and good to see you up there in the twenties!

Margaret Weston - How do I know I know God?

Good story telling and bringing life to the characters.
Looks like a good witness for people changing and turning to God.
Even though it is more for YA I found myself enjoying it very much,
Regards,
Walt

THEY CALL ME BLANKA
This is a heart wrenching story of what it takes to survive in a tough environment. I like the way you sprinkle a touch of Spanish throughout your narration; makes a reader feel as if they’re really inside Banka’s mind. I think you’ll find a ready audience for this among teenagers as all of us wish at some time they could have the opportunity to wake up in another person’s body. Highly starred and added to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

Hi, Laura. I'm finally getting over to take a look at your book. I've read the first five chapters at once; it's really good, and I couldn't quit reading. You do a wonderful job of writing from Michelina's viewpoint. I liked the "spanglish" you included; it gave a real depth to the reading, even if I didn't know quite all of the words.
This is really good! I wish you all the best with it. I'm also rating it very good. :)
~Hannah

Laura,
Powerful beginning. Poor girl, willng to be beaten to belong. All very believable. I don't speak Spanish, so found the mix of Spanish and English difficult. Saw only a couple of errors, but they may be part of the slang you're using, so ignore if they were intentional.
1. 'lights glaring down you', thought you meant 'lights glaring down on you.'
2. 'She keeps trying to get me go to' thought was probably 'get me to go to'
3. prolly, reads like slang but did you mean probably?
Good work, strong story, hope you make it into the circle.
Janet
The Milche Bride

Dear Laura, your book is a real hook.I do like it very much! It's an amazing portrayal of reality - life, as it is. Your images are vivid, live and touching. The most bright, as to me, is that disgusting scene with chocolate milk. It pierces the reader's heart and fills it with an explosive mixture of sympathy and indignation... Well done, perfectamente hecho, mi querida hermana!!!
To be constructive, I am supposed to say smth. of use... OK, I'd suggest to change just one sentence: " She offers him a made up cheek and he plays at planting a big sloppy smooch on it.

Max.stars, WL and to be backed for sure (just wait a little bit till I free up some space)

Best of luck, dear Laura !
Come to my profile and have a look at my short story.Maybe you'll like it too..

Val But
Escape.

Hi Laura

I'm sorry but I never made it to chapter 2! I found the Latino element confusing, the slang non comprehensible, the Spanish mixed with Americanised english like a foreign language and the subject matter so alien that I just couldn't get into the story at all.

This would have a limited audience here in the UK which is a pity as I can see that it is well written, an intriguing story and probably deals with some important social issues that affect a lot of people. So if your market is solely the US, you should do well.

Best Wishes
Pam Balsdon
The King's Blessing

Added to my book shelve cause you deserve top ten. Good Luck

For christ sake you should be outta here!Highly rated.*********
Josphine

Hang in there sweetie! It'll all work out. You've got an amazing manuscript here that deserves to be published. Don't lose heart!

People Check out this book! It has amazing writing style with deep feeling that pulls you along with the characters.
You will feel at you Read!
The story will grab hold of you to keep reading.

Shelby Z./Driving Winds

Laura, you nailed a sixteen-year-old's attitude, the difficult relationship with a loving and patient mother, and the tough challenges of a teenager living in Stockton, California. (I have to tell you that I felt so uneasy getting off the freeway and tried my best to plan for gas from L.A. to Sacramento to avoid having to get gas in Stockton!) Your writing is powerful, vivid, capturing and drawing me into a story with a strong message. It's simply superb :)
T. Donna Robison (No Kiss Good-bye)

Ingenious POV – fantastic to experience first person yet still get beyond its confines. Poignant use of language. Authentic, gritty, … everything I’ve been looking for.

I've done a lot of work in Stockton. This is a great take on a truly downtrodden American city and a great place for a spiritual journey. When are you going to publish it?

What you got here is art. Period. Fix the typos near the end and this will hit the bookstore shelves with a resounding success. Lina reminds me of my sister and to be in her head like that was a big trip. Love it. And if I can get Alexa to pull the buds outta her ears and read some she would love it too! Excellent!

I began reading this and was drawn in by the main character. I hope you can update the file soon as I'd like to see changes, and also, I would focus on perhaps adding "quotes" to the dialogue in the opening chapter for ease of reading. There are some grammar/proofreading opportunities but I really like the idea behind this and think it's an important book for its audience. There are alot of us white girls who grew up in Latino communities and it's not easy. Great voice. Feel free to check out my young adult thriller, On Gallows Hill. Thanks!

I know I've already commented, but I had to read the final chapters now that you've uploaded them. You have created a modern day "Christmas Carol," but instead of a man learning to love his fellow man, a girl learns to accept the love of Christ. The way Blanca visits each of her relatives and friends in turn, learning to see life through their eyes, is the perfect device for your intended readers, who often can't see anything beyond the ends of their noses. I love YA kids, but they can be incredibly self-centered. Your story will help them break out of those bonds.

This is a wonderful book. I'll be proud to offer it to my students.

~AudreyB

Hi, I've read seven chapters now and I thought I'd just offer a few more thoughts. The direction the story has taken isn't at all what I expected. Your main character's journey into the lives and bodies of those around her is a twist I didn't see coming. It adds an unusual dimension to the story and allows me to understand the other characters in a strange, intimate way. Of course, I'm mindful that I do not yet know the cause of this or what exactly happened to your main character after we left her on the tracks. Is she dreaming? Dead? The mystery of this is more than enough to encourage further reading.
I loved the part about the eyes like mood rings. I've noticed a couple of small typos; "She looks abut to object" (Ch 3) and "..gives me a tug up stilling gripping my head" (Ch 4) and "Lydia and I are in our frilly, bedroom" (Ch 6) Also sometimes Cookie and Shortie's names are in italics but mostly not.
Occasionally I haven't been entirely sure whether the English directly after the Spanish is a direct translation or if it is a continuation. As someone unfamiliar with Spanish I've struggled a little bit to follow some of the direct speech, although not enough to spoil or confuse the story. As a reader in the UK, I think my unfamiliarity with some of the ideas, culture etc makes it all the more interesting. Good stuff!
Lucy Middlemass
Jinger Barley and The Murkle Moon