Book Jacket

 

rank 376
word count 31928
date submitted 30.10.2011
date updated 21.05.2013
genres: Non-fiction, Harper True Life, Chri...
classification: moderate
complete

God's Gracious Gift - Why Coincidence Does Not Exist

Joy Eastman

People often believe life is a book filled with luck or coincidence. Now discover how each chapter is written by the hand of God.

 

The poverty of my childhood became the catalyst for my marrying much too young. In 1972, a standard surgery following the birth of my second child catapulted me into the worst nightmare of my life. Months of anguish and pain would shake my faith and ultimately destroy my marriage. It wasn’t until 21 years later that God would reveal His miracle, but not without Satan rearing his ugly head.
In August 1992, my 6:00 a.m. arrival at the hospital proved to be unsettling.
"What type of surgery are you scheduled for?" a nurse asked.
Words stuck in my throat. "Brain surgery".
"I'm sorry,no one under your name is scheduled for surgery today."
My mouth gaping, I stood stunned. As a nurse rushed to call my doctor, I found myself feeling frustrated, silently questioning God for His reason. Why this obstacle now when I felt so confident about the surgery? Was God warning me I had made the wrong choice again? Was this really His will or was I making the same mistake I had made 21 years before, a mistake that almost cost me my life.

 
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tags

abandonment, christain memoir, courts, faith, heartwarning, jesus, love, miracles, poverty, reflective

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Marriage and Maybe Love

North Memorial Hospital 1971 - Day 11

    It was day eleven and Jeff finally showed his face at the hospital.   He kissed me on the cheek and then scowled at me.  “You look terrible, Stacey.  When are they going to let you out of here?”

    I just wanted to punch him sometimes.  “You know I can’t go home until I go to the bathroom.” 

    Jeff tossed back his head in laughter.  “You’re trying to say you’re full of ----”

    “Stop it!”  I pulled on his arm and nodded my head toward Kelly.  “I have a roommate now.  Kelly, this is my husband Jeff.”

    She waved her hand and tried to force a smile.

    “What’s she in for?” Jeff whispered.

    “They don’t know,” I mouthed back at him.

    “Well, at least you have someone to pass the time with.  I’m leaving this afternoon for a four day trip.  Do you think they’ll know something by the time I get back?”

    “What’s the difference?  I don’t think I’ve seen you more than three times since I’ve been here,” I said, pouting.  When Jeff scowled, I quickly changed the subject.  “How are my babies doing?”

    Jeff placed his hands on his hips.  “You have a little boy and one baby.  Jeffey is doing much better at my brother’s house, and of course Janna loves it there.”

    I felt the tears filling my eyes.  “I worry so about Jeffey.  I wish he could talk to me on the phone, but he just threw it down when Mama tried.   Little Janna doesn’t even know her own mother.  I need to get home.”

    “Come on, Stace.  Where’s your faith?  I stuck it out a year in Vietnam not knowing if I would die any day.  You’ll make it out of here just fine.”

                                         ***

Some people say that faith is impossible because you can’t see it or touch it but it just has to be there.  The Bible tells us in Hebrews that “Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen”.    But what does it mean to a small, confused child when she hears for the first time about faith and love and Jesus?  I was a little girl when Grandma Miller told me about Jesus, and how He loved me and died for my sins on the cross. I remember kneeling by my bedside that night and asking Jesus to come into my heart.  I wasn’t sure if it had really happened, but I never forgot the experience. Then soon after we moved to Robbinsdale and began to attend the Baptist church, I heard the same message over and over.  So with the faith of

a child, I walked the aisle in church, giving my life to Jesus.  Eventually, I re-dedicated my life to God after a Billy Graham crusade.   

Slowly, as I grew in the Lord and studied the scriptures I accepted my faith but took it rather for granted.  It became a part of me so natural it became ordinary or expected.  When I met Jeff I was convinced God had a special plan for me and a special person I was to marry.  No one would ever convince me that I had made the wrong choice.

Marriage and sex was not all I thought it would be and our honeymoon was spent seeing the sights while Jeff had patience with the state of my sore bottom.  We were married just two months when Jeff was drafted into the Army.  I was devastated.  After two months in boot camp, Jeff came home to announce he was to be stationed at Fort Lewis in Washington, a well known stopping ground for training for Vietnam.  Jeff insisted I move with him to Tacoma, and I agreed that we should spend whatever time we could together before the inevitable happened.

Our rented bungalow was just outside Tacoma. I walked to work in the morning watching Mt. Rainier resemble a huge chocolate and mint ice cream cone slowing melting, entwining its colors.

I faced the everyday drudgery of being an army housewife without a whimper of resistance, on the surface, that is.  Although Mama had never allowed me to wash clothes at home, I had watched her plenty of times and thought the task couldn’t be all that difficult.   I’m embarrassed to recall the words that spewed from my mouth the first time I washed a pair of army fatigues.  I knew they had to be properly starched so I figured an entire box must be necessary to get the job done right.  When the pants were done agitating, I placed them between

the two metals ringers that reminded me of two sheared down rolling pins.  Of course, the pants had a mind of their own and proceeded to wrap handily around the ringers without coming through to the other side.   Furious, I snapped open the ringers and was appalled at the white streaks embedded in my prize clean pants.  Rinsing them out, I began again, this time very carefully pulling them through the ringers by hand. They’d hung on the line for about an hour when hot tears welled up in my eyes.  They were stiff as a board!

    When Jeff arrived home, he laughed himself silly, and then put his arm around my shoulder.  “That’s OK, honey; I’ll have the best-starched pants in the platoon; that is if you can find a way to iron them!”

    It was the only time in our marriage that we were truly a part of one another.  Although we had all the normal arguments of adjustment, we only had one another to rely on and that fact seemed to draw us closer.  

On weekends when Jeff was off duty, we’d drive up the mountain and hike the trails.  It was our special time together and the best part of my memory of him. I would never have believed it if someone had told me then that our time together in Washington was as good as our marriage was ever going to be.

Jeff, too, had proven his faith over and over.  When we were in Tacoma, we became involved in the nearby Baptist church and began working with the youth. Many a Sunday morning, I would watch Jeff place our last ten dollars in the offering plate, knowing it was a full week until payday.   I would cringe inside wondering what we would do for money until then.  The next few days always brought a letter from home, with ample money inside to see us

through until payday.  It was my first experience with real faith, trusting God to lead while walking through darkness.  I understood then how Mama’s faith had been her resource through our most difficult years.

    My six months of happiness ended when Jeff received his orders for Vietnam in June of 1966.   He was to leave in July and had one month to put his affairs in order. 

He had the most difficult time saying good-bye to his mother.   She was confined to a wheelchair, stricken by Multiple Sclerosis even before Jeff was born.   The doctors said she would die having him, but twenty years later, the world was still blessed with this vibrant Christian woman. She carried a cup that was always half full, never half-empty.  She was the most positive person I would ever know in my lifetime. Jeff’s father was a God fearing man and loving husband. He would always try to turn bad into good, going out of his way to make everyone feel comfortable. He gave Jeff a passage of scripture from the 91st Psalm to carry with him over in Vietnam.

I saw the first change in Jeff in the days just before he left for Vietnam.  He said he had to shut off his feelings if he were to make it back home.  I accepted it as best I could, but it tore me up inside when we said goodbye.  I wept bitter tears as I placed my head on his shoulder and his arms encircled me.  I had no idea it would be the last true moment of caring that I would receive from Jeff. 

I watched the mail for his letters and read each one with the hope of his safe return.  After six months, I reluctantly traveled to Hawaii for Jeff’s R & R.  Rest and Recuperation was what the army called it, but it yielded only horror stories about soldiers seeing their wives for a few

short days and then being hurled back to a senseless war, possibly to face eternity.  Jeff had been sullen and withdrawn before he left for Nam, but when I saw him in Hawaii with only traces of his blond curls left on his head, and his six foot frame so gaunt, I could barely choke back my tears.  

    I wanted him to declare his feelings of love and tell me how much he missed me, but no words of tenderness were uttered.   I was so young and selfish; I couldn’t understand why he didn’t whisper the words of love I needed to hear.  I behaved like a spoiled child, demanding answers for his behavior and destroying whatever love we shared.  When Jeff returned to Vietnam, the tears in his eyes only created in me a secret pity party.  I had failed to be there for him.

      Jeff accepted a transfer to General Westmoreland’s honor guard in Saigon only a few weeks after his R&R, and soon after I noticed the love letters he once had written were replaced by obligatory commentaries on the state of the war.  I tried my best to pretend things hadn’t changed, but I had to face the truth.   Jeff had been promoted to sergeant and squad leader just before Hawaii and claimed he accepted the transfer for my peace of mind.  He never acknowledged his own fears about combat nor his agonizing decision to leave his men behind.   

    Jeff was discharged from the army early for staying in Nam an extra month.   He came home with the Purple Heart but refused to speak about the battle that earned him the honor.   In fact, he refused to speak about much of anything.   He was sullen and aloof, a deliberate stranger.  I prayed for patience, confident that God wouldn’t have sent this man into my life only to allow a brutal war to destroy our marriage.  I felt like I was riding a bicycle built for two, clinging to Jeff

as we journeyed together, blissfully striving to enjoy the scenery yet blinded by the closeness I desperately sought.

    Jeff was only home a few months, when I discovered he was having an affair.    It didn’t surprise me when the deacon’s daughter refused to leave her husband.  Our first child was conceived the night Jeff came home and asked me to forgive him.    The words from my mouth said, “yes, I forgive”, but the pain in my heart would not let me forget.   I wanted to trust him, but he was restless and eager to spend time away from home.   He worked his way through sales training school by working nights as a janitor.  We rarely saw one another.  His weekends were spent playing sports or fixing a friend’s car.  We were growing further and further apart, and I was slowly awakening from my dream.  One day I found her picture in his billfold, and I knew then that the affair had never really ended.  I kept quiet as by now I was several months pregnant and tied to Jeff forever.  I could only hope that someday he would love me again.

    I began to see Dr. Johnson, in whom I placed all my trust and would for more than thirty-three years.   My due date was January 7th, but on New Year’s Eve 1968, my water began to leak, and Dr. Johnson sent me to the hospital.  I couldn’t decide if Jeff was angry or nervous that night he drove me to Northwestern Hospital, but he spoke very little.  My water broke shortly after I arrived in my room, and I was relegated to my bed until labor would begin.   I was disappointed when Jeff left me alone to contemplate the birth of our child. 

Unfortunately, my room was in earshot of the delivery room where a new mother was delivering by breech birth.   For several hours that night, I listened to her screams while my imagination put me in a state of panic.   

 

    The next day with Jeff by my side, my whispered words of love were returned with silence.  I finally accepted the truth I had avoided for years: the man I loved had died in Vietnam, and a stranger had returned in his place.

Jeff Jr. was born at 3:33 p.m. that New Year’s afternoon, January 1, 1969.  For a brief few months Jeff seemed honestly happy, and it was obvious he loved his son.  Looking back, I guess I wanted to believe my dream of a happy marriage still had a chance of happening.  When a person has a fantasy, they dwell on that fantasy and can’t always see the reality around them.  My fantasy world soon crumbled beneath my feet.

By the time our baby was a year old, Jeff made it perfectly clear he didn’t love me and had only stayed with me because his girlfriend had also conceived her first child by her own husband. 

Jeff became more and more distant as he traveled extensively with his job.   When I discovered there was yet another woman in Jeff’s life, he made no attempt to hide the affair.   I decided then that it was time to stop avoiding the truth.  Jeff’s behavior wasn’t just caused by war trauma.  There was something so much more I had to face.   Mama has been right all along.  I had married a man who enjoyed the company of women far too much.  I had married a man just like Daddy. 

 

 

 

 

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Bart Jahn wrote 280 days ago

Joy...this is my CLF review.

First, I was touched and moved by your beautiful story. It is well written, easy to follow, and your voice comes through clearly with honesty, strength, and genuineness. There are some remaining typo's and a few missing words, but I see that other commentors have pointed these out already with their usual precision and grace.

As I was reading your story, especially through the last 5 or 6 chapters, I thought about how God is so incredibly capable of creating the same lessons of faith in people's lives through entirely different circumstances. I thought about Joseph, Moses, David being chased by King Saul, and others throughout the Bible. What is so inspirational about your story, is that no matter how difficult the road, it ended in a personal faith and trust in Jesus Christ that will endure for you for an eternity. I think that is what all Christians deep down want to discover in this life...not faith in our church, in our theology, in our pastor, in our prayer group, our Bible study group, our family and our friends (all otherwise good). We want to discover through a journey of faith that God is trustworthy. Your life-story and your book makes this argument in a powerful way that only God could compose and orchestrate...far above the realm of coincidence. And God was able to weave all of this into a story having recovery, reconciliation, forgiveness, redemption, and most of all love amongst an expanding group of family, loyal friends, and two priceless granddaughters. Jesus comes to seek and to save that which is lost in our present broken world.

I do agree with Patricia Laster's comment of 16 days ago, that it might be useful to consider moving some of the very positive ending, maybe some of chapter 21, for example, up to the front of the book to give the reader the clear sense that this early struggle is headed toward an incredibly positive outcome. I know movies sometimes start out with a glimpse of the positive ending, then fade back into the beginning of the story through a flashback. Without changing your Authonomy version, you might experiment and then try out these changes with your reading critique focus group outside of Authonomy, for their reactions before making any changes in this current version.

For me, the book really started to pick up steam around chapters 13-15, to where I wanted to keep reading to find out what would happen next. The literary device of giving the reader some of this impetus upfront to spur them on at the beginning of the book is something to consider at this fine-tuning phase of the book. Just a thought.

I think you have a very fine piece of writing here, that absolutely grabbed me and pulled me into the story. With a little further tweeking, and another pass or two to correct misspellings and missing words, I think you have a God-inspired book that will bless, encourage, and uplift a number of people who may or may not be facing a life-threatening illness.

One final note of encouragement. I suspect that many of the authors on Authonomy (including myself) are vulnerable to the notion that our ranking on Authonomy is an accurate barometer or validation of our book. I see that this book is in the 600's. With some thoughtful and prayerful changes, I think this book merits landing in the low double digits at some point. But whether or not it reaches the ED, you have a very good product based upon a genuine move of God in your life, which would help large numbers of people facing the beginning stages of a similar experience. The fact that this is a real-life autobiography, and that Jesus Christ saw you through to a beautiful resolution against very discouraging circumstances, speaks volumes about the God we follow. I pray that God would see you safely through the publishing challenge, and that the fruit of your life would reach the biblical hundred-fold level of blessing and helping other people. It certainly touched me. God bless you. Bart Jahn

AudreyB wrote 284 days ago

Hi, Joy – I am going to get a reputation for rolling in last with my CLF reviews. As you know, I am often accompanied on my reviews by my English teacher alter-ego, The Grammar Hag. If I say anything you don’t like, it was probably her idea.

Is this a new SP: People often believe life is a book filled with luck or coincidence. Read the book to discover how each chapter is written by God. I love it! I can imagine many people picking up a book with this on the cover. Life does seem random—until we consider it in the light of faith and God’s purpose for us.

I think I saw that someone else had commented on the remark “it was the nineties…” I think you might want to be more specific about what’s different in the nineties. For example, I’m thinking, “Medical costs spiraling out of control so hospitals aren’t as caring as they might have been in another decade.” But I don’t know if that was your purpose or not. After reading again about your medical woes as a young woman, I’d say that being clearer about the changes would also offer some interesting foreshadowing if you compare the experience of the 90’s with your experience in the early 70’s. In fact, as you had horrific experiences in the 70’s despite receiving more nursing, you might want to expand a little on that because it’s a nice juxtaposition for your story. It also frames this experience well because we ultimately know how frightened you had to have been when you arrived and found they didn’t have you in the system.

I have also heard ER nurses make unbelievable unprofessional remarks. I’m a teacher. I go home and tell amusing stories about my students to my husband. But I avoid staff-room talk because it’s just too much of a bad habit. Telling you your ‘behavior’ was intolerable is, in my opinion, a firable offense. I hope you reported this to your doctor. (When I had a bad experience after having my first child, my OB listened to my remarks & reported them to the hospital.)

I remember from reading this before that your life story is simply enthralling. Your illness makes a strong frame from which to hang a life story and keeps the reader guessing and engaged. One thing that I think gets in the way is that you habitually make remarks like, “This was awful but the worst was yet to come.” It’s a bit distracting when you do it so often. Once would be better. Maybe twice.

At the end of chapter 17, you say you were shocked when the nurse handed you the card of Dr. Gregg Marklund. Why were you shocked? You hadn’t met him yet.

Your story is quite timely. It’s the Christian counterpart to the television drama “House,” in which a thoroughly unpleasant doctor diagnoses the most perplexing of conditions in very sick patients.

I’ve still got this on my WL for future backing.

~AudreyB
Forgiveness Fits

KMac23 wrote 288 days ago

CLF Review

I started reading this earlier today and kept reading late into the night! What an inspiring story! I'm shocked at the doctor's treatment of you and all you had to endure in both the hospital and in your childhood, but am so glad that you found God was there for you in your trials, and that he used these difficult times to draw you close to him. I saw nothing in the story that needed to be changed, as it was heartfelt and emotional. Only a few typos can be looked at. Ch. 1, "You'll have to wait...(period missing) Ch. 9 I was starring down... (staring) Ch. 13 I just want to make them right with all of you (.") and She had married daddy under her step-father's name, but was (n)ever legally adopted.
Other than a couple than that, I loved your story and the peace in God it conveyed. High stars!

Kara
A Gate Called Beautiful

PTingen wrote 287 days ago

Joy,

Just couldn't stop reading your book this evening. Your story is so compelling I couldn't wait to find out more. A few thoughts as I finished ch. 14. When you say, "eventually I married and my husband was sent to Vietnam" it's written as though it's the first time we're hearing it, yet we already knew that from earlier in the book. So that seemed kind of odd.

The other thing I found confusing is that you're referred to as Stacey throughout the book but have your name as Joy. Since your story is so unbelievable to begin with, it seems like it could lead more to the reader wondering whether or not the story is really yours.

But all in all, it's an incredible testimony of your perseverance and God's grace throughout your life. Just amazing!!

Blessings!

Patti

Chris Whitson wrote 305 days ago

Hi Joy, This is so full of raw feeling and truth. You take the reader right in and introduce them to a strong dose of reality. '.......a number to be randomly tossed into a raffle bowl'. That is the best description I have ever heard describing the terrible nameless feeling that so many people struggle with in these situations. Your pain and suffering is strongly felt.
The early years are sad, but there is beauty in the love of your mother for her children and all God's creatures. This is a story of endurance, courage and Faith. At each turn a gentle figure appears as if placed there by God to lend just enough assistance at just the right time. Your Faith is a miracle! People can learn from your strength and devotion. I'm inspired by you and your heartfelt story.
Thank you for sharing this. This book will be a wonderful healing tool for all you read it. We take so much for granted.
High praise and stars!
God Bless,
Chris/ A SPICY HURRICANE

Christine May wrote 18 hours ago

Thank you for sharing your life with your fellow Christians, and perhaps encourage others that have questions and are not sure about God.
Your story is heartwarming and sad, with a glimmer of hope for people that put their trust in God.
I am glad to be revisiting your book, like the Bible, it always reveals new insight.
Christine

Brian G Chambers wrote 1 day ago

Joy
I've reread your story and was deeply moved by it. You are so right in saying that God does everything for a purpose. We would not have Tilly now if it had not been for the skill and dedication of Miss Bosarovic being at the hospital where Tilly was born, because all the other surgeons said that it was a waste of time to operate. We can only thank God that she was there at the right time. So I know what you have gone through and I'm sure you, like me understand that God does everything for a reason. I really felt all the emotions you were going through throughout your life. There is quite a few places throughout where your sentences get broken up, I don't know if this is just an error by authonomy or not, but you should check it out. I gave you five stars last time I read your work, but I am increasing it to six. Once I get my WL and shelf sorted out you will have a place on both.
Best wishes.
God Bless.
Brian.

KMac23 wrote 2 days ago

Joy,
I thought this was really good the first time through. Though, the story is the same, it was definitely more polished and smooth. Even though I’ve read through it before, it kept me riveted to it once again. I still can’t believe all you went through.

I saw a couple typos, etc. Hope they help.
Ch. 12 “Jeff’s (known) since January.”
Ch. 14 He was at a place where he belonged, and he finally knew his father had chosen to leave me, (and not me leave him.)
Eventually I married. (This was around the time Jeff was sent to Vietnam.)
Ch. 17
My yearly exams were always in the fall of the year and I (was) determined…
Ch. 19
When her kidneys (no comma) failed(,) we knew it was…
Epilogue
I thank God for a mother (who) had such a strong (and) enduring…

Your story still brought tears to my eyes, when you spoke of your friend with all the health issues and what you felt for her and then later, when you spoke of Janna and the closeness you experienced when she grew older, and again right before you went in for your surgery and you were comforting your family. How beautiful that was you could have that kind of strength and peace from God. The ending chapter was perfect. I think your work is precious and such a witness to God’s reality and presence in our lives when we let him in.

Kara
A Gate Called Beautiful

Seringapatam wrote 36 days ago

Joy, What a fantastic story this is. I know there are a couple of little glitches that I am sure you will amend, but I loved this. What a brilliant marriage between the characters of this book and the delivery of the narrative. The icing on the cake being the cool flow. Such an intelligent piece of writing. Loved it and good luck. I will be scoring this high.
Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R) Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you?? Many thanks. Sean

Labradors and cappuccino wrote 39 days ago

You are a good writer -clear and concise, you draw people in. My book -Led by the Holy Spirit- is similar in some ways -I think you'd like it. I'm giving you some time on my shelf. Hope it helps.
Olivia

ibholdvictory wrote 41 days ago

Hi Joy, I am impressed by your writing and I have given you stars. Excellent and heart felt story. I cannot fault this facinating work. Your book is straight forward and very easy to read and follow, you should do well. It is worth publishing. God bless and continue tho hang on to God's love. Don't forget to drop by my page to support me. Blessing to you.


Catherine
If Only You Could Tell.

Ron Mitchell wrote 72 days ago

What a marvelous testimony of God's enduring love. Don't give up on having this published. God had you write it for his purpose. Best of luck and God's continued blessings. Thank you for your support of December Gold.

Debbie R wrote 140 days ago

Joy

I did read some earlkier chapters quite a while ago but thought I'd dip into your story a little further on so I have read chapters ten and eleven.
This is such an open account of some traumatic events in your life. I admire your ability to be able to write about your experiences in such an honest and engaging voice.
The phrase 'I ached to see my children' is so powerful and emotive.
The scene when the doctor administers the tube to drain your lungs was quite horrific and brutal. Shocking to know that someone has had to suffer like that. And yet there is your faith that gives thanks for the positives like the brain tumour that proved to be a collection of calcium.

Although there is immense sadness in this, your strength of character shines through.
There is a definite market for this kind of story and many will draw on your faith and positivity.

I wish you all the very best
Debbie

Su Dan wrote 181 days ago

very good book- honest and true; and tell it using the perfect narrative voice...
...backed...
read SEASONS...

Blancherose wrote 188 days ago

Joy, this story is so moving, being raised in poverty, a fathers love lost, a family home lost, a doctor that butchered you, that was really hard to read, as if we don't all dread those kind of things. I don't know how you sustained all this but I know the Lord does sustain us. Then a husband who like your father ignored his family and yet you are still positive and have been able to see the good side of life. This book will speak to others suffering any kind of personal suffering who need hope in their circumstances. Blessing s with your book
Roslyn
Scribe-Lings, for your child like heart
"I Am" Through the Ages, for your seekingheart

George54 wrote 189 days ago

Hi Joy
I have read some of your book and love what I have read. It is very true that God works all things for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose. If a Christian reaches the stage where they can indeed believe that, thery are most blessed indeed
A pleasure to back your book. Thank you for having the courage to write it

Brian G Chambers wrote 189 days ago

Joy
I have read to the end of chapter four and I have loved every word of it. This is a book that I'd love to sit by the fire with on a cold winters night and read it cover to cover. It is a beautiful, if sad. story and I love it. I think you will do really well with this one. A truly remarkable, well written, true story that I am sure would be a joy for anyone to read. It is a pity that one can only put five books on their shelf, because yours definately belongs there. I have it on my WL for just now but it will be going on my shelf in the future. Thank you for sharing this great story. I'm sure it will do well for you.
Thank you for your support of Tales for Children.
Your friend
Brian.

evermoore wrote 192 days ago

Joy...what a gift you've shared in this tale. I have always been aware of God's hand in my life when reflecting on events later, rarely--until lately--at the time. You have put into words the journey you traveled, touching so many that stumble along the way that will find strength in reading this book. I've given you high stars and have you on my watchlist. God bless...Linda

Patricia Laster wrote 205 days ago

Joy: Thank you for letting me know about the new opening to your book. This is just what I'd hoped you'd do when I left my first review. You've nailed it, lady. This is much, much better. I enjoyed every word of it and have absolutely no corrections nor further suggestions for your opening chapter. Good work!

subra_2k123 wrote 227 days ago

Hi Joy,
I am a firm believer of destiny being the culprit of every vicissitude in our life. This fact, anybody would have known, if they care a little about introspection. I read couple of chapters and I felt I understood every word in it's true sense. But I concentrated on the content and so did not notice any mistakes, because I did not focused in that angle. Starred and backed. Get back to you after some more read with 'oh I found it' attitude.

venkatarama dandibhotla

Clare B wrote 263 days ago

Dearest Joy, this book is beautiful, a gift to the reader, it is in the knowing having faith is just enough. You have sincerely proven that, this is my type of book. I will be reading the whole of the book, it is with greatest intention we share our inner sunbeam and spread be the human sunshine. For when we love God our hearts, minds, bidy and soul become the plentiful.

It is with hopeyou read and comment on be the human sunshine a very small pocket book of sunshine blessings Clare.

Clare B wrote 263 days ago

Dearest Joy, this book is beautiful, a gift to the reader, it is in the knowing having faith is just enough. You have sincerely proven that, this is my type of book. I will be reading the whole of the book, it is with greatest intention we share our inner sunbeam and spread be the human sunshine. For when we love God our hearts, minds, bidy and soul become the plentiful.

It is with hopeyou read and comment on be the human sunshine a very small pocket book of sunshine blessings Clare.

Sara Stinson wrote 268 days ago

Joy,
This is a beautiful and well-written story. We all have struggles and through our faith we can endure.
High stars, Joy.
Sara Stinson
Finger Bones

Christine May wrote 272 days ago

Sorry it took me so long to start reading your story, but it was meant to be. My sister, who lives in Holland went through what you described in your first chapter, the pain, the vomiting, it looked like she was not going to make it. She is just now getting better, three months later.
I hope to read the same in your case. You write very well, look forward to reading on.
Christine

Dianna Lanser wrote 273 days ago

CLF Review -

Hi Joy,

I have read through chapter thirteen of your book now and I am struggling to put it down, but it is very late. Your story is touching me in such a deep way. You have conveyed “faith” very tangibly. I am amazed by the strength God has given you to forgive -- to see the good in very difficult and unfair circumstances. Your attitude puts heart and soul into your faith and it is, I’m sure, an encouragement to all your readers (as it is to me.)

Your writing is easy to read and even though the circumstances are horrific, I found myself glued to your story. There is an amazing balance between anger and acceptance with what happened to you. Neither is there a pity party or a sugary view of providence. Your story is told with absolute honesty.

You definitely have a story to tell… I hope God will be pleased to open the door wide so more than just Authonomites can read your book.

Here’s a few notes I made along the way.

Dianna Lanser

Chapter five - I loved the humor in Edna and Sid’s driving partnership.

Chapter six - Paragraph starting “During these teenage years…” is kind of long. Perhaps splitting it up into two or three would make it easier to read and separate the different thoughts.
Your honest about your relationship with Jeff is refreshing.

Chapter seven - Hearing how you came to trust Jesus at such a young age made me smile. I wonder if you could tell your readers the difference between giving your life to Jesus and dedicating your life. I understand the Lordship part of walking with God, but others may not.

“Slowly, as I grew in the Lord and studied the scriptures I accepted my faith but took it rather for granted.” This seems a little obscure or undefined. And then the next sentence sounds a bit awkward and the two sentences together are somewhat redundant. “It became a part of me so natural it became ordinary or unexpected.

“Mama has (had) been right all along. I had married (a) man just like Daddy.”

Chapter ten - “…because the pain in my chest was worsening as they (the) day progressed.”

Abby Vandiver wrote 274 days ago

Simply written this is a good story. Seems like someone is very sick and it keeps you turning the page to see what happens, because you think, this could happen to me. A ggod dose of God and hope, I found myself cheering her on. Good job.

Abby

Chancelet wrote 277 days ago

Christian Lit review: “God’s Gracious Gift”

In chap 4, you bring up very powerful stories of Kaja and her children in a simple and concise manner that’s quite effective. The only part of this chapter that was difficult was so many names, especially your father’s family. It was a bit much. But the story continued just as poignantly after that.

In chap 6, Jeff never learned to eat pizza is weird. Maybe say, Jeff never ate pizza before.

Still a very good story.

N. LaRonda Johnson
http://www.authonomy.com/books/45790/anticipation-of-the-penitent/

Bart Jahn wrote 280 days ago

Joy...this is my CLF review.

First, I was touched and moved by your beautiful story. It is well written, easy to follow, and your voice comes through clearly with honesty, strength, and genuineness. There are some remaining typo's and a few missing words, but I see that other commentors have pointed these out already with their usual precision and grace.

As I was reading your story, especially through the last 5 or 6 chapters, I thought about how God is so incredibly capable of creating the same lessons of faith in people's lives through entirely different circumstances. I thought about Joseph, Moses, David being chased by King Saul, and others throughout the Bible. What is so inspirational about your story, is that no matter how difficult the road, it ended in a personal faith and trust in Jesus Christ that will endure for you for an eternity. I think that is what all Christians deep down want to discover in this life...not faith in our church, in our theology, in our pastor, in our prayer group, our Bible study group, our family and our friends (all otherwise good). We want to discover through a journey of faith that God is trustworthy. Your life-story and your book makes this argument in a powerful way that only God could compose and orchestrate...far above the realm of coincidence. And God was able to weave all of this into a story having recovery, reconciliation, forgiveness, redemption, and most of all love amongst an expanding group of family, loyal friends, and two priceless granddaughters. Jesus comes to seek and to save that which is lost in our present broken world.

I do agree with Patricia Laster's comment of 16 days ago, that it might be useful to consider moving some of the very positive ending, maybe some of chapter 21, for example, up to the front of the book to give the reader the clear sense that this early struggle is headed toward an incredibly positive outcome. I know movies sometimes start out with a glimpse of the positive ending, then fade back into the beginning of the story through a flashback. Without changing your Authonomy version, you might experiment and then try out these changes with your reading critique focus group outside of Authonomy, for their reactions before making any changes in this current version.

For me, the book really started to pick up steam around chapters 13-15, to where I wanted to keep reading to find out what would happen next. The literary device of giving the reader some of this impetus upfront to spur them on at the beginning of the book is something to consider at this fine-tuning phase of the book. Just a thought.

I think you have a very fine piece of writing here, that absolutely grabbed me and pulled me into the story. With a little further tweeking, and another pass or two to correct misspellings and missing words, I think you have a God-inspired book that will bless, encourage, and uplift a number of people who may or may not be facing a life-threatening illness.

One final note of encouragement. I suspect that many of the authors on Authonomy (including myself) are vulnerable to the notion that our ranking on Authonomy is an accurate barometer or validation of our book. I see that this book is in the 600's. With some thoughtful and prayerful changes, I think this book merits landing in the low double digits at some point. But whether or not it reaches the ED, you have a very good product based upon a genuine move of God in your life, which would help large numbers of people facing the beginning stages of a similar experience. The fact that this is a real-life autobiography, and that Jesus Christ saw you through to a beautiful resolution against very discouraging circumstances, speaks volumes about the God we follow. I pray that God would see you safely through the publishing challenge, and that the fruit of your life would reach the biblical hundred-fold level of blessing and helping other people. It certainly touched me. God bless you. Bart Jahn

Kerrie Price wrote 283 days ago

CLF Review
Hi Joy,

Great work. Your book is well written and mostly well edited. After the gripping prologue, I found myself deep in a real-life horror story. Well, they do say truth is stranger than fiction! I am so pleased it has a happy ending! :) The beauty of it is the way your Christian faith shines through it all. Thank the Lord for a Godly pastor, who was such a blessing, and for Dr Marklund, who won and deserved your trust.

I came across a few minor corrections needed, so I thought this was probably the place to mention them.
Ch. 4 little Martha "was scared on her arms and legs for life."
Ch. 9 "I was starring down at them."
Ch. 13 "...but was ever legally adopted by him."
Ch. 18 "...they nurse shaved..."
"...only through exploratory surgery can we for sure."
Ch. 20 "...a tube down by throat."
"...white surgical gaze."
Ch. 21 "If that's true then way didn't..."

Isn't it amazing how many times you can read through, yet miss those little typos?
I wish you every success with your book. I heard a quote somewhere that goes something like this - "For the Christian, all the bad experiences you have here on earth, are all the hell you'll ever know." (Sorry, I don't know who said it).

http://www.authonomy.com/books/38568/god-s-gracious-gift-why-coincidence-does-not-exist/

Lacydeane wrote 283 days ago

I read through chapter three and can't wait to read on. Your story is very interesting, and touching. I enjoyed every minute. I will say you had me near tears at the end of the third chapter but only because you were able to draw me into the characters so I cared about them. Great writing job.

AudreyB wrote 284 days ago

Hi, Joy – I am going to get a reputation for rolling in last with my CLF reviews. As you know, I am often accompanied on my reviews by my English teacher alter-ego, The Grammar Hag. If I say anything you don’t like, it was probably her idea.

Is this a new SP: People often believe life is a book filled with luck or coincidence. Read the book to discover how each chapter is written by God. I love it! I can imagine many people picking up a book with this on the cover. Life does seem random—until we consider it in the light of faith and God’s purpose for us.

I think I saw that someone else had commented on the remark “it was the nineties…” I think you might want to be more specific about what’s different in the nineties. For example, I’m thinking, “Medical costs spiraling out of control so hospitals aren’t as caring as they might have been in another decade.” But I don’t know if that was your purpose or not. After reading again about your medical woes as a young woman, I’d say that being clearer about the changes would also offer some interesting foreshadowing if you compare the experience of the 90’s with your experience in the early 70’s. In fact, as you had horrific experiences in the 70’s despite receiving more nursing, you might want to expand a little on that because it’s a nice juxtaposition for your story. It also frames this experience well because we ultimately know how frightened you had to have been when you arrived and found they didn’t have you in the system.

I have also heard ER nurses make unbelievable unprofessional remarks. I’m a teacher. I go home and tell amusing stories about my students to my husband. But I avoid staff-room talk because it’s just too much of a bad habit. Telling you your ‘behavior’ was intolerable is, in my opinion, a firable offense. I hope you reported this to your doctor. (When I had a bad experience after having my first child, my OB listened to my remarks & reported them to the hospital.)

I remember from reading this before that your life story is simply enthralling. Your illness makes a strong frame from which to hang a life story and keeps the reader guessing and engaged. One thing that I think gets in the way is that you habitually make remarks like, “This was awful but the worst was yet to come.” It’s a bit distracting when you do it so often. Once would be better. Maybe twice.

At the end of chapter 17, you say you were shocked when the nurse handed you the card of Dr. Gregg Marklund. Why were you shocked? You hadn’t met him yet.

Your story is quite timely. It’s the Christian counterpart to the television drama “House,” in which a thoroughly unpleasant doctor diagnoses the most perplexing of conditions in very sick patients.

I’ve still got this on my WL for future backing.

~AudreyB
Forgiveness Fits

Biblesleuth wrote 284 days ago

CLF review
Hi Joy,
Your book really struck home for me as I have recently been experiencing stomach problems and for the first time in my life am seriously concerned about my health. In spite of the “gory details,” I much enjoyed the read, and my heart went out to you with every chapter. That aside, I want to say that you have a very good command of the English language, which, in my opinion, automatically puts you in the top 25 percent of Authonomy submissions. I did, however, notice some problems that I think need to be addressed, and I hope that my comments will be seen as beneficial and constructive.
First, use a semi-colon instead of a hyphen between your title and subtitle (God’s Gracious Gift: Why Coincidence Does Not Exist.) Second, I think you are using two, three, or sometimes even four spaces between sentences; two having been the standard in the typewriter days. Nowadays, however, editors want you to use only one space, I think because using two messes up typesetting directly from the manuscript’s computer file. Also, word processors automatically justify (make larger or smaller) the letters to make sentence spacing even out. Thus, in the computer age, it has become customary to use only one space, and forcing a modern reader jump over that extra space (or spaces) tends to throw off their timing and enjoyment. For the overwhelming opinion on this you can google “one space or two.” It will be tedious, but my suggestion is that you turn on the “Show all symbols” tab —it looks like a Paragraph symbol (¶)—and get rid of those extra spaces, or else you may have a “find and delete” function that will do the job.
Next, as good as it is, I don’t think you have gone back to edit your work sufficiently. I noticed a lot of errors of the kind that tend to creep into word-processed documents. These can include missing words, words that are spelled correctly but happen to be the wrong word, missing or incorrect punctuation, and just plain oversights that you can read over and over without noticing. I will list some of these to give you an idea what to look for. Ch 2: “Mama ran for phone.” “the” is missing. Your ellipses ( . . . ) are inconsistent, mid-page in this chapter you have 5 dots at the end of the sentence. Use three dots in mid-sentence and four at the end of a sentence. Also, those asterisks that you use to break up sections of text are fine, but you will want to center them instead of having them in different places as you have. To make it come out right in authonomy, make the asterisks, copy and paste one set on top of the other, center the top set (center function,) and use the space bar to line up the bottom set with the top set. Then delete the top (center-functioned) set and keep the bottom set with its space-bar spaces lining it out to center. Ch 3: Italicized “Leave it to Beaver” carries over into the next word, “world,” which has been mistakenly italicized also. Ch 21: Missing question mark at end of “What made you so sure of your diagnosis?” Also, I would use “I asked” there instead of “I said.” Two sentences later you mistakenly have the word “way” when you meant to put “why.” Missing word “a” before “second granddaughter.”
So you can see, Joy, that you need to go back over this a few times. The more the merrier, as these little devils are extremely hard to spot, especially in one’s own work. You might try reading it to yourself out loud, or at least very slowly, focusing on each word and point of punctuation. Also, of course, you can have other people read it, giving them a pen and asking them to mark down anything they see. Best of luck with this, and you have my sincere prayers for your health and well-being. Oh! And no rush, but scratch Tippy behind the ears for me.
Eric
The Second Symbol

Chancelet wrote 285 days ago

Christian Lit review:

I’ve read the 1st 3 chapters so far. Your voice comes out very well, and it is a hear-felt story that gets us thinking of our own histories. The stories are told in the oral history tone that brings to life the characters, including your siblings, Uncle Ed and the pets. I’ll return to read more soon. Below are some additional comments.

The first paragraph is a bit confusing, because you say “It was the 90s and everything was different.” Different from what? Before that you say “gone were the days,” but your timeline is unknown. By the end of the Prologue, you get a better understanding what’s going on, but still your comparing two different time experiences are confusing when you don’t know when the other time period was.

In chapter 1, do you mean, “Only my screams echoed...” Saying “My screams only echoed…” sounds like the screams should have done more.

I like your description of your early life. Very descriptive. Instead of mummified, I think you mean petrified body.

N. LaRonda Johnson
http://authonomy.com/books/45790/anticipation-of-the-penitent/

David Olawoyin wrote 285 days ago

CLF Review:
Thanks very much for the offering, Joy. I recalled I had commented on your book sometime ago. I wanted to cheat and use that former comment for CLF but could not find it, and so I had to take another look, and I think it’s just good for you. You obviously have a strong story to tell and you go about it with gusto. Moreover, you write quite well, have a strong voice, and your tone is apt. The primary issues I have noticed, however, are diction (word choice) and the need to tighten your prose. Oh yes, I am presently undergoing orientation for my new job as a freelance technical editor and my senses are being sharpened to these things. You might think otherwise, but here are instances. In your pitch, you write: “My previous siblings had been beautiful…” That sings some, but to an editorial eye, it might be better put as: “My OLDER siblings had been beautiful…” On the other score, you write in the prologue: “My 6 a.m. arrival at the clinic proved to be unsettling. “ For an opening line, why not tighten it and enhance impact with: “My 6 a.m. arrival at the clinic was unsettling. “ Guess you get my line of thought, which you can apply along the way. I would also suggest that you strengthen your pitch and build it around the core of your story. At the moment, it is a bit disjointed and seems to be going different ways, and falling back in the process. All said, you have a worthy story and write well, and I wish you all the best with this. Would look out for an opportunity and incentive to give it a push. Thanks again and many blessings.
David
Would appreciate your thoughts on THE EVOLUTION OF ETERNITY
http://www.authonomy.com/books/41044/the-evolution-of-eternity/

PTingen wrote 286 days ago

Wow Joy - just finished up. What a testimony you have of God's grace and love! Bless you for your unbelievable attitude in spite of enduring more trials than most of us can begin to imagine. I pray all the best for you and hope your story brings hope and life to all who need to hear it.

Patti

Ch. 15 - it says you were 6 years his senior. But that you were 36 when you met and he was 28 when he died, so that's at least 8 years difference.
Ch. 19 - just checking that you wanted the same paragraph in this chapter as at the beginning of the book or if that was also a result of rewriting? I kind of like the repetitiveness as it felt like I had come full circle with you and was now ready to hear the end of the story.

Lenny Banks wrote 286 days ago

Hi Joy , I read chapter 5. I was hooked by your pitch and wanted to know more. You have written a fantastic account of your childhood and the voice that speaks is one with passion and conviction. I felt sorry for the smelly girl, I am sure there was also such a character in my school. This is a very interesting piece of work, I would like to come back and read more if I get a chance.

Kind Regards
Lenny Banks - Tide and Time: At The Rock

PTingen wrote 287 days ago

Joy,

Just couldn't stop reading your book this evening. Your story is so compelling I couldn't wait to find out more. A few thoughts as I finished ch. 14. When you say, "eventually I married and my husband was sent to Vietnam" it's written as though it's the first time we're hearing it, yet we already knew that from earlier in the book. So that seemed kind of odd.

The other thing I found confusing is that you're referred to as Stacey throughout the book but have your name as Joy. Since your story is so unbelievable to begin with, it seems like it could lead more to the reader wondering whether or not the story is really yours.

But all in all, it's an incredible testimony of your perseverance and God's grace throughout your life. Just amazing!!

Blessings!

Patti

PTingen wrote 287 days ago

Joy,

I just read the next 3 chapters. This time I didn't focus on finding typos but just let myself enjoy your wonderful story. Your descriptions are so vivid and I like the way you use flashbacks. Very effective! Anxious to keep reading. :-)

Patti

KMac23 wrote 288 days ago

CLF Review

I started reading this earlier today and kept reading late into the night! What an inspiring story! I'm shocked at the doctor's treatment of you and all you had to endure in both the hospital and in your childhood, but am so glad that you found God was there for you in your trials, and that he used these difficult times to draw you close to him. I saw nothing in the story that needed to be changed, as it was heartfelt and emotional. Only a few typos can be looked at. Ch. 1, "You'll have to wait...(period missing) Ch. 9 I was starring down... (staring) Ch. 13 I just want to make them right with all of you (.") and She had married daddy under her step-father's name, but was (n)ever legally adopted.
Other than a couple than that, I loved your story and the peace in God it conveyed. High stars!

Kara
A Gate Called Beautiful

PTingen wrote 290 days ago

Joy,

I read some of your story quite awhile ago and am glad to be back for a more thorough read. I've gotten through 3 chapters. I have some typos included and would suggest that if you know someone who could help you do some editing to clean up the punctuation errors, etc., it would give your story a more polished look.

Most importantly, you have an incredible story, enduring things I can't even begin to imagine. Thank you for your bravery and openness in sharing such personal experiences. I look forward to reading more to see how God brought you through unbelievable circumstances.

Many blessings to you!!

Patti

Ch.2 - gorilla-size hands, (I'd use a dash in there and a comma after hands rather than a semi-colon)
The next few weeks I spent in agony, (again I think there should be a comma rather than a semi-colon)
Mama ran for phone. (missing the?)
Ch. 3 - I think you need a comma after Jack. You don't need commas before or after Katherine.
claw-footed tub (need a dash)
soda fountain, setting up (use a comma rather than a semi-colon)
I wasn't understanding who the Bambi Man was.

Charlotte12 wrote 291 days ago

***Review for the CLF***

What a way to start a book! The prologue reminded me exactly of what I felt the time last year when I was to go in for surgery, was prepped, had even been stuck in the hand by the anaesthesiologist and then was told it was cancelled! And The Beginning brought back a lot of memories! Needless to say, you had my attention right from the start.

Okay, about the actual story, I have to say that I enjoyed the matter-of-fact tone and style of the writing. It didn’t feel over-embellished. You drum up quite a bit of empathy for the MC, as the hospital experience was utterly atrocious. We feel the MC’s pain and despair. The only thing I noticed in the Prologue was that there is a question mark missing at the end of the last question.

Chapter 1: I am not sure about the punctuation in the last two sentences. The semi-colons seem misplaced or to add some confusion about the pacing and meaning of the sentences. That may be one of the reasons I had a little difficulty understanding the imagery used to describe the scream cutting through the silence and emptiness, for example.

Chapter 2-Days of Innocence: I love the description of the early, ’simpler’ life of the 50’s and the relationship between the sisters. Well done. One thing that wasn’t clear to me was how she was able to protect the MC even when she was home from school?

The section when the MC talks about being fearful seems to come out of nowhere and then ends and is not mentioned again. This seems to be important, so perhaps there is a way it can be rewritten to that it is better highlighted or better connected to the over all story.

I think it would be nice to know how many years after the father left that he died.

Is it supposed to read ‘packaged fryER chicken’?

There’s a question mark missing after ‘What’s wrong?’

Maybe ‘…before it got him!’ instead of ‘…before it accomplished its goal’? It sounds a little less formal.

I like the way you end this chapter, sort of setting the tone for what is to come.

This is turning into a touching story, one where the reader pulls for the success and well being of the MC right from the start. I am very glad to have come across your book and hope that it continues to do well.

Best,
Dyane
The Purple Morrow

James Workman wrote 291 days ago

For CLR forum: Wow! Joy! I've read 1-4 looking for a break. I'll keep reading. I had to check to make sure this wasn't fiction. I can't wait to get to the resolution with God.

Shelby Z. wrote 291 days ago

Joy, your book has a lot of depth of feeling to it.
The opener is really an eye catcher. I can't imaging having something like that happening.
The flow of your book is easy making it a paced read.
For me I don't really read Biographies.
However you write very well as your word out your story into this book.
Grand work.

Shelby Z./Driving Winds

P.S. Please take a look at my Christian pirate adventure Driving Winds.

Dianna Lanser wrote 292 days ago

Oh I forget to tell you. I'm rating this six stars. I thought I had early but I didn't... :-)

Dianna Lanser wrote 292 days ago

CLF Review

Hi Joy,

I have read the first four chapters of your book so far. I’d like to echo what Faith said about your book. Your heart and strong, indomitable spirit came through as I read the difficult circumstances of your childhood, your heritage, and your more contemporary situation.

Despite the tragedies I get a sense of hope which is portrayed through the fact that the writer realizes everything is broken - life is not quite right. You are doing a wonderful job bringing the reader through the “pit” in order to make them ready for the hope you have found in Christ.

I love these kind of stories. Unfortunately, someone has to live them in order to tell them. I’m sorry you were the one who had to experience such difficulties, but God has given you the gift of writing to bring Him glory. In our weakness He is strong. And God’s strength comes shining through in your writing.

Like Faith, I too loved the authenticity of your voice and how you made the “everyday” incidences of your childhood to tug at the heart of your audience. Everybody loves to read about the Cinderella child who is able to find joy amidst the ashes of life. You do this so well in relating the stories of your sister and your pets.

Oh, I wanted to tell you that I liked the chapter titles too. I especially liked chapter four, reading about the grandparents and parents. It certainly brings out the effects of living life without the One who is able to keep us all from falling. Incidentally, my maiden name is Bailey. My grandfather was a preacher, but our family tree is not without its stories as well…

I will happily read on!

Dianna Lanser

Chapter three -

“It was tough to use the bathroom without water to flush to (the) toilet…”

faith rose wrote 292 days ago

Dear Joy,

I am so happy to be back visiting your book for the CLF! I started at the beginning again and read up through chapter 4 today. There are so many things to love about your book. I hope I will be able to put into words how much I adore your story.

FIrst of all, I love your tone...your honest voice. There are so many times when authenticity simply shines. For example, "yah, right, the only thing I need is a new body." Also, when Dr. McGeorge sent you home "with a bottle of Milk of Magnesia in hand." Your honesty shows humor and heart throughout. I love it!

I also really like your descriptions.You have wonderful word choice, but it is not overly flowery (just for the purpose of choosing big words!). Some of my favorites were: "surrounded me like a death shroud," "scratchy nylon sofa," and "pressed their wrinkled jowls tightly..." Great stuff!

The family dynamics also deeply connect the reader on an emotional level. From the bond with Katherine and Edna, to the struggles of Mama, and the abandonment of Dad. Even the beloved dog really pulls at the hearstrings and gives the reader a very moving image.

I think my favorite aspect of your writing is your use of flashbacks. You cycle in and out, giving the reader bits and pieces, then zooming out for a broader view. I love this! It is particularly poignant at the end of chapter four, with the line: "I knew his legacy had followed me. Mama's past was my future..." Wow.

This is a wonderfully-written book, beautifully brimming with heart and soul. I'd give you more stars if I could, but you already have 6 from me! An amazing piece.

All the very best,
Faith Rose
Now To Him

Grey Muir wrote 294 days ago

CLF Review
Hi Joy.
This was an amazing memoir. You filled it with personal details and emotions from the beginning through to the end. The story jumped right into a huge hook with the surgery and mix-up of the schedule.
So many bad things happened, but there was so much love and gold to fill in.

Nice repeat of the start in chapter 19 and a very fulfilling finish.

This type book isn’t my normal preference, but when I started reading I was hooked. I read it entirely through without stopping. This is an excellent story and knowing it is a memoir makes it so much more poignant.

I am reminded of a quote from one of my favorite authors. C.J. Cherryh, “Coincidence is how God makes physics work.” (FYI - Cherryh is a famous science fiction and fantasy writer.)

A full 6 stars and I hope you’ll be moving to the Editors Desk rapidly.

Patricia Laster wrote 296 days ago

I'm going to take a real risk here and be bluntly honest about something, Joy. Forgive me and try to understand that I'm taking this risk because I think you have the makings of a great book here and I want to help you reach its potential if I can. You know I really wish you would change the order of your book and start the book immediately with your final diagnosis by Dr. Marklund. Follow this by a backflash to your childhood and tell your story in chronological order from there. I know this is a major overhall, but I feel really strongly that it will give a lot of credibility to your story, Joy,and for the following reason:

Here's where I stick my neck out (go ahead, chop it off...smile) as a person and a psychologist, I was wondering more and more, as I read your book in the order in which you have written it, if you were suffering from hypochondria rather than a real illness and blaming your early doctors and nurses for your problems, especially since your descriptions of the earlier medical personnel made them sound more like monsters than real nurses and doctors. If I had known, from your prologue, of the final diagnosis, I would have followed your story with much more seriousness and more readily accepted the truth of the early medical personnel's incompetence.

A second suggestion I have for increasing the credibility of the things that happened to you is actually twofold:
1. During those earlier times in the hospital when the nurses and doctors were monsters, were there any staff who were kind to you? If so, bring them into the story. Otherwise I wonder if readers will be dubious, as I was, of your perspective?
2. I am a passionate animal lover - I have had pets all my life and now have two cats and two dogs...so I empathize with your love for animals completely. But two things again bothered me a bit in relationship to the animals in your story - the horrible endings for the pets of your early life...could you talk more about the good times - perhaps humorous events - that you had with your pets and give their horrible demise a little less emphasis? and ... perhaps as an adult, give less time to describing your pets - just mention them occasionally and, if there has been any humor at all in their time with you, it would be a good thing to tell about that.

This is the second time I've read your book, Joy, and I have been captivated by it and, in the end, inspired by it both times...once I found out the true diagnosis of what was happening to you. I admire you awesomely and do believe in your writing, do believe you have talent, and definitely believe you have a story to tell. I would like to see you tell it in a different order, however, and with a few changes as I've mentioned above.

Your Christian testimony is marvelous - so real and so passionate - and I would leave it exactly as you have expressed it. God has certainly touched and been a part of your life and it shows, actually, it shines. The scripture verses you have quoted touched me to my core. Thank you. Thank you. Beautiful story, Joy, by a beautiful Christian lady.

Chris Whitson wrote 305 days ago

Hi Joy, This is so full of raw feeling and truth. You take the reader right in and introduce them to a strong dose of reality. '.......a number to be randomly tossed into a raffle bowl'. That is the best description I have ever heard describing the terrible nameless feeling that so many people struggle with in these situations. Your pain and suffering is strongly felt.
The early years are sad, but there is beauty in the love of your mother for her children and all God's creatures. This is a story of endurance, courage and Faith. At each turn a gentle figure appears as if placed there by God to lend just enough assistance at just the right time. Your Faith is a miracle! People can learn from your strength and devotion. I'm inspired by you and your heartfelt story.
Thank you for sharing this. This book will be a wonderful healing tool for all you read it. We take so much for granted.
High praise and stars!
God Bless,
Chris/ A SPICY HURRICANE

David Olawoyin wrote 334 days ago

It always takes courage for us to put the most personal issues of our lives in writing and hang it out there for all to read. But, as you said, every chapter of our lives are written by Him, including that in which He might have appointed us to share our stories for the benefit of others. “In thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned out, while as yet there was none of them,” says the Psalmist. For this courage, you must first be commended.
Having said that, I must also say that you write well and your voice is apt for your genre. Your starting idea in the prologue is brilliant and pulls in the reader, especially the closing line – although I believe you can tweak it some to intensify it. Consider strengthening the imagery by describing the atmosphere in the room and elaborating on the emotions and inner turmoil of the principal characters of the scene, especially yours.
While sparse writing can indeed be a plus, I am noticing that you might be getting too sparse and somewhat jumpy, especially considering that this isn't fiction. Indeed that's what quickened my attention, because it was beginning to read like fiction. I suppose true-life stories 'sell' better on arousing the emotion, which takes us back to my initial note and suggestion. You might also want to keep an eye on your sentence structure, including looking out for where they could be broken up to improve readability, where you can tighten things, and on issues of punctuation. Take for instance in Chapter 1 “I was so sick after the bath of my second child, I didn’t even have enough milk to nurse her, and beyond that I wasn’t even strong enough to even care for her.” Consider: “I was so sick after the bath of my second child, I didn’t have enough milk to nurse her. Beyond that, I wasn’t strong enough to care for her.” Notice the sentence break, the inserted comma, and the two occurrences of “even” taken out. The purposes of the two “even” are already well served by “so” and “beyond that.”
I will conclude by suggesting that you strengthen your pitch to reflect the uniqueness and depth of your story, as that is often the make or mar feature for potential backers and peeping editors/agents. I can imagine you greatly tightening your prologue to include some of its information in your pitch, especially the latter part of the prologue. Indeed, there is a little thing I also noticed in the pitch: “My previous siblings had been beautiful." "Previous" and "had been" sound like a tautology.
All said, this is a very good and worthy work and I will be looking out to make room for it on my shelf soonest. Thanks for offering this. Best wishes and blessings always.

maretha wrote 341 days ago

Dear Joy, I started reading your wonderful memoir God's Gracious Gift ... and actually couldn't put it down. Your description of your experiences in hospital, the crudeness and carelessness of nursing staff and administrators are so shocking and yet we all call ourselves Christian - what a shame. Your story is an encouragement to anyone who has faced adversities in life, whether as children, facing a family breakup, poverty. You write matter of factly, without making us feel overwhelmed by sadness, rather your account is written in such a way that it serves and an encouragement and upliftment of one's soul.
Thank you again and keep turning out books like this. :-) All the best on Authonomy
Maretha/African Adventures of Flame, Family, Furry and Feathered Friends

Debbie R wrote 346 days ago

What a wonderful story. Very engaging and so well-written, the pages just flow. Your memoirs are rich with characters both good and not so good, and you have really caught the times and places of your childhood and adult life so well.

I was so engrossed that I barely made any notes - but I did write down one sentence that stuck with me 'It was the happiest time of my life, and yet I didn't know it.' These are very wise words.

I havee read to the end of chapter 6 but will definitely return and read more. This is the type of book I would buy and treasure.

Thank you for sharing your memoirs - they are truly inspiring.

Lots of stars and wishing you lots of luck with this book.

Debbie
Speedy McCready






irelandsmemories wrote 349 days ago

Hello Joy
What a joy to read, literally! Your opening was the hook, you delved right in to the pain, suffering and emotion and then you built your story-line of showing not telling perfectly. I couldn't click the pages fast enough, each chapter grabbed me, not only with the story and intensity, but with your heartfelt emotions. Growing up without was difficult enough but dealing with deeper sorrow was distressing, all the while you maintained your integrity. Your descriptive tone was fantastic, describing each character and location, creating perfect visuals...

Thank you for sharing your life in this powerful memoir, it is truly inspiring...
I will back this book today..
Good Luck with the rest of its journey
FC

mistybrooke wrote 352 days ago

I LOVE this pitch. It is so real. I am willing to bet that this book cannot be put down, once started.

faith rose wrote 353 days ago

Dear Joy,

This is truly one of the best memoirs I have read! You write with such heart, such deep emotion. I was immediately drawn to your story, and the richness of your writing has kept me turnng page after page. I love the little details such as Edna taking you to church "whether or not you wanted to go," and the description of the "shack" gave a authentic, genuine view of life itself.

An amazing piece, Joy. I wish much well-deserved success. Highest stars!

All the very best,
Faith Rose
Now To Him

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