Book Jacket

 

rank 16
word count 90305
date submitted 14.03.2012
date updated 13.04.2014
genres: Fiction, Literary Fiction, Thriller...
classification: adult
complete

Slow Poison

Casimir Greenfield

Amsterdam 1987. A quiet assassin waits for the perfect moment. Thirty years on, that moment has arrived.

 

Slow Poison opens in Amsterdam in the days around the feast of Saint Nicholas in December in the mid 1980’s.

The brutal slaying of a British tourist and the subsequent arrest and imprisonment of a young football supporter sparks off an orgy of violence. But the killing is no random act. The boy is innocent. The real killer returns to England to begin the final chapter of an obsessive campaign of revenge spanning several decades.

The twisted acts of violence and vengeance are punctuated by the pages of a stolen diary written in the dark days of the second world war. The killer identifies with the unspeakable horrors of the death camp as he coldly wreaks revenge for a series of traumatic events that took place in the mid 1950s on a Gloucestershire council estate.

The story culminates with an abduction and a bloody siege high in the snowbound Cotswold hills.

And nothing and no one is quite what they seem...

(This book contains very strong language and scenes of a sexual nature. )

Slow Poison is available on Amazon
Cover Artwork www.rubenireland.co.uk
more info: www.davidireland.biz

 
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tags

abduction, abuse, amsterdam, concentration camp, cotswolds, crime, drug addiction, football hooligans, gay, holocaust, kidnap, murder, ominous, reveng...

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250 comments

 

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Izmir49 wrote 130 days ago

I have just read eleven chapters of your book. It is so dark and most of the characters are so twisted and cruel, it is intriguing but disturbing at the same time. To be honest, i cant bear to read any more. It is really well put together, which cant have been easy as it is such a complex story with so many threads together. Your writing is powerful and i am sure it will stay with me for some time, but it is too dark for me. I wish you all the best with it. Lucy s

Steve Clark wrote 134 days ago

One feels the darkness of this story from the opening paragraph. Slow Poison weaves a convoluted path that is at once confusing and intriguing. "The man" introduced in the opening line stays as a common thread through the first four chapters and, I assume, will continue to do so until his identity and purpose are revealed later in the book. If one enjoys noire reading that borders on the horror genre, Slow Poison shows significant promise.

The story could benefit from some sentence restructuring. The first paragraph could be put a little less awkwardly. This same writing pattern is seen in later paragraphs as well. In each instance, all the right words are there, just not put in quite the most effective order.

The way the story switches scenes can sometimes be a bit confusing. I would have started the 2nd chapter at where Fred's backstory began. In my opinion, the first two or three paragraphs of the 2nd chapter would more fittingly be placed at the end of the first chapter.

The scenes describing Freds' confrontation with the young punks on the stair are excellent. The descriptions of Den's fear are compelling.

I might suggest the author submit the work to a good content (developmental) editor to correct some of the structural elements of story. Overall, from the four chapters I read, this book has great potential. Just a few tweeks in the the dialogue and narrative would make all the difference in projecting this book to the top of the heap.

Steve
All The Pretty Dresses.


sensual elle wrote 163 days ago

This is quite the intrigue, 6 chapters in and I don't have a clue (yet) where this is headed except 'the man' has a plan amongst several parallel threads. Wreaking havoc is the theme, from Fred, the hooligans, and especially the man. It's hooked me and I back it.

elle
Diary of a Bad Housewife

Chris 1 wrote 234 days ago

You portray Amsterdam oh, so accurately. (I used to love that town before the stag nights/hen do's got their mitts on it). But, more than that, I enjoyed the way you got to grips with your characters who, initially, came across as unsympathetic but, given the closer look you provide, soon become more rounded characters with depth, and a deeply harrowing past.

I also like the way you keep coming back to the 'old man's diary'. The reader knows that something is brewing in the background and will, at some stage, come bursting through to the foreground. It's an excellent way of holding the interest AND giving the story broader scope. BACKED

Lara wrote 289 days ago

YARGIII

This is a powerful book with some powerful images, as might be expected from the violence portrayed in some chapters. There are other emotions besides horror, however, and the sections where the MC and Janet interact work well. There is sadness and sex too. I liked the subterreanean feel of the horror, worse than buckets of blood.
There are different themes interwoven all seething away under the main action. So well done for a good read.
Backed.

Rosalind Minett
A RELATIVE INVASION
SPEECHLESS

Callaghan Grant wrote 4 days ago

Casimir,
Bar none, this is, so far the best writing I have read on this site. I can only imagine that the star rating is not higher because of its very dark nature/theme. Still, the character studies are so bang on that I was captivated and hooked. There are a number of insignificant errors throughout the text and, so much do I believe in this work's value, that I offer to help you with those corrections if you'd like. Given how busy I am writing my own series and promoting the same, that's high praise.

For readers who can stomach the sad/pathetic and gruesome deeds described in your work, which factually pale before some of what I have witnessed/experienced myself, the plot and characters actually whisper of love that transcends this one incarnation described in the story. The Man actually loves Lenny and, in a sick way, Lenny's brother Fred too. Their sick relationships speak to the a personal axiom of mine: "Every deed, no matter how outrageous, is either an extension of love or a cry for love to be extended. In either case, the only appropriate response is love. EVERY situation, properly perceived, is an opportunity to heal." Strange as it seems, I can imagine sequels where these same beings end up reborn in new roles and work out their "past" tragic stories and come to be reconciled. And a worthy work it would be, both for the characers and the writer. May we all be reconciled.

I want to thank you for writing "Slow Poison" which is so aptly named. After all, the work serves to demonstrate the truth that "Nursing a grudge is like drinking poison and waiting for it to kill the one you've begrudged".

I remain "dead impressed".

Warm regards,

(Cailin) Callaghan Grant
"Chalice", "Beacon", "Traveler", "Maker"
"The Shouting Tree", "The Fiddler's (Laughing) Bride"

brucerodgers wrote 6 days ago

Casimir - What an interesting novel. Thanks very much for the opportunity to read it. I suppose the first thing to say is that it really got me thinking, which any good book should do.

My personal take on it, which I'll explain, is that it is a bit of a mix. Aspects of it are superb, whilst others didn't quite work for me. My recommendation would be to bolster the former and lose the latter. Then this could be truly
great.

So, in more detail...

The pitch is excellent and really got me interested. As a premise to a story this would engage any reader. And this is the backbone that I think you should concentrate on - the mysterious killer, the secrets in the past, the links to the war and to a lost relationship. Fab.

The opening chapter sums it up well. The passages where the stalker follows the group capture the mood of the pitch brilliantly. We are immediately viewing Amsterdam through the mind of this dark stranger, capturing the
ambience, the sights and sounds as he perceives them. But then we get bogged down in lots of dialogue and information about 'The Six' and Fred and his group, which are an unwelcome juxtaposition to the previous detail.

If we start with The Six, firstly it doesn't really matter to the reader what their names are. If we take it from the killer's perspective they are a foil, a cover for his act of brutality. To him they are a means to an end and what they are called jars with this thought. They are better as an unnamed group, a six headed beast, indistinguishable from each other. I would also argue that we don't need any of their dialogue. It doesn't add to their purpose in the story. Equally, the conversation at Fred's table. The killer is listening in, so we need to understand to some extent what he is hearing, a brief glimpse into the life of his victim, but it should just be snatches, perhaps with a subtle commentary from the killer reflecting his attitude to his prey. I think this would really help the flow and the mood of the opening.

And this principle really follows thereafter. The passages involving the killer were excellent and I was really drawn in to his mission, bolstered by the beautiful but mysterious passages from the diary. His brutal relationship
with Fred's brother was intriguing and handled very well. But the other passages regarding The Six and Fred's relationship with Becky didn't grab me and I found myself gliding over them slightly to get back to the killer. The passages regarding Fred's childhood were good and clearly started to reveal the secret behind the murder and were only really lessened by the one bugbear I had with your style...

...swearing. Now, I can swear with the best of them but for a piece of work as high quality as this it really cheapened it and made me want to stop reading at times. I always see it as a slightly lazy way to develop characters (I know because I've done it myself in the past!). Think about what you are trying to express about a person and find another way to reveal it. So, for example, if we take The Six, we know they are louts from their behaviour, which the killer carefully watches and describes. We don't need to hear them f'ing and blinding because we can imagine it. Try reading your opening chapter with those bits removed and I promise you it will read much more powerfully. It is the same with Fred. Clearly you are trying to show that he is by no means a saint but having him swear all the time doesn't really provide this. What makes that clearer is through his actions, tying other children to lawnmowers, locking them in sheds etc. This gives the reader the information they need to know, you don't need to embellish it. Where I believe swearing can be a very useful tool is in highlighting a moment of real exasperation or fury. By using it sparingly it accentuates the passages where it is used. This has always been my problem with writers such as Irving Welsh.

I hope this helps. Obviously it is just my opinion so take or leave the comments as you see fit but I think you have the makings of a very classy, dark thriller here and I don't think it would take much to get there. As they always say, less is more!

I wish you all the best with it.

Kind regards

Bruce :)

Orson Paddock wrote 8 days ago

I read 2 chapters where I normally do only one. The first chapter was busy and somewhere you dropped in the War bit but the context went over my head. At the end you drew the restaurant scene together well and I was warming to your characters. Chapter 2 was more together. There are some constructions I found a little awkward as examples '...abandoned their diamonds and flew with the flock', or 'The final reunion with the old sow left prescient chinese burns all over his soul, a nasty little Gypsy's curse of a demented future.'
Perhaps 2 chapters could be one. The drama for me is the two groups in the restaurant and their stories merging into the tragedy, this, I think, is compelling and deserves 100% of my attention. The rest of the narrative doesn't fit for me and while I am sure is necessary to the book overall, needs to be structured differently,( in my very amateur opinion.)

Good luck with it.

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

Casimir! It's brilliant and I am dazzled. Yes, it's all "an eternity of two dimensional artifice" and we live to write it and thereby make it our own.

I thoroughly enjoyed this wonderful six star read. You kept me up most the night. What a lover. Bravo. Well done...

Callaghan Grant
"Dreams seem real while they last. Can we say more of life?"
Havelock Ellis

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

Casimir! Chapter 21: "...What was there to fear. He had already begun the journey once long ago. Since then, there had been few thrills to equal Heaven."

Yeee-up... The most blessed and lucid moments of my life were spent dead and rendered everything after hilarity and insanity and... an anticlimax. Worse, the one who was waiting in between, I knew and His presence has been a shadow in every relationship. But He tells me to love... even the likes of Francis, perhaps especially so and so I can't help it, I love Francis. That doesn't mean I couldn't cull him, without malice, the poor bastard... I KNEW he didn't have it in him. I knew he'd look into the eyes of an innocent and see himself so many years before. Just making a prediction of an opportunity for blessed redemption for the lot of them. I am a romantic and choose to believe the best in everyone. There is a shard of the divine in every one, and it is that light that holds the soul together and so, the more vile the perimeter, the brighter the light within. One cannot help but wonder if those deranged by cyclical evil are not just as much stoking the light within as they are feeding the darkness at its edge.

Callaghan Grant
PS: "Good morrow."

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

"The space between joy and peace had been too long, too troubled, had been filled with unbearable pain. The craving for the sweet taste of vengeance had long since disappeared. He wished he had died back there with the others..."

Yes. Am there. Doing that. But vengeance never entered the mind and so one wonders how could any god who actually cares be? Then again, it is all only a dream and no one dream is more real than another and so we are free to dream as we please.

Still having a grand time and compassion is, as always, rising like the phoenix from the ashes of illusion. I even love "the man".

Callaghan Grant
"How could Heaven be perfect missing even one of Her children. Therefore forgiveness is for everyone and I shall laugh in Paradise with my earhtly tomentor and toast with earnest joy our reconciliation."

"It was nothing personal. The bastard simply needed killin' so I obliged him without malice."

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

Casimir, ending words of chapter 17: "There was no god. There was nothing. There never had been". MORE evidence that we've been somewhere very similar. 'Twas my own experience that it was all just a bad dream when once I was dead and looked back. I had slipped contexts afterall and REAL-ized the fact that nothing here could hurt me. Well, nothing but my own conjured experience. And so, somehow, I went back to tell "the others": "It's nothing to which you can reasonably expect to assign an accurate label. Don't name it. Or, if you must, mind that you summon the experience with your labels. We are the gods of our own reckonings."

Some pretend to know this and yet they summon wildly and with no mercy even for themselves.

Your work is a brillaint study of self-deception hidden as skilfully as the Dreamer misses his own craft within the dream. I'm afraid I must stay up to finish it! (Ye bastard. You got me. THAT almost NEVER happens.) };-)

Callaghan Grant

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

Casimir, the last lines of chapter 12: Beautiful. "There is no god..."

Well, there is but, too bloody well, I understand.

"...I could not look up to the sky as your soul rose to stain the cloud..."

So, I am captivated. I must know, what sort of abuse does "the man" use to "justify" his own cruelty? Having been to Hell and back, it fascinates me that anyone could learn from such experiences ANYthing but "I would to NEVER so torment another". I know it happens. I've seen/experienced the consequences but I do not understand a mind that so wildly reckons that anything but further suffering could ever come from the cold cuts of revenge. ...Perhaps I suffer from an excess of empathy.

Still fascinated and staying up late to read on (you bastard)... };-)

Callaghan Grant
(You know the one.)

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

Casamir, and now, in chapter 4, you break my heart for poor Becky and give me enough backstory on Fred and Glyn that I have come to care about the characters. THAT is what I call setting the hook! I am a hard reader to hold, honestly (a little A.D.D., I fear) but hold me, you have, dear man. I want more... I am just hoping you don't make me angry with any of these gnaffs in what follows. Our affair is so new and fragile, after all...

Callaghan Grant

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

Casimir, Chapter three, still a triumph of insight, upheaval and insinuation. This is the most layered and conceptually descriptive writing I have read on this site. Sensory and laminated with intention and inuendo, it slays all resistance to its advance. When the eye stumbles it rushes onward, breathing in the kerfuffle with wanton enthusiasm. Brilliant. Highly recommended. It sounds as if you have once been dead or to the edge of that abyss. I know because you write of it so well and I have been dead (although just "merely dead" not "really most sincerely dead"). Well done. If HC doesn't snap this up they have missed a superior investment.

Callaghan Grant
"Chalice", "Beacon", "Traveler", "Maker"
"The Shouting Tree"

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

Casimir!

Chapter two is diabolically powerful. Well done! You watch entirely too closely and you know way too much about this pathetic tribe... It must be an exorcism for you to spill it all out through your fingers into the keyboard.

Callaghan Grant
"Chalice", "Beacon", "Traveler", "Maker"

Callaghan Grant wrote 15 days ago

Casimir, my LOVE! You've proven it at last: There is something seriously amiss with me. I mean, I knew I was a little... erm, "murky", but I never fancied myself so entirely opaque. I've read one chapter and I'm laughing, my eyes gleaming with minacious fascination. I should have known. My own villains make me chortle with nefarious glee, after all. This is great fun! And I haven't a mean bone in my body. Maybe that's why I so enjoy it in your work. I'll be back for much more of this! I knew I saw SOMEthing in that glacial gaze of yours... MuHUHU-HUhahahaaaaa...

Callaghan Grant
"Chalice", "Beacon", "Traveler", "Maker"
"The Shouting Tree", "The Cheshire Cat", "The Fiddler's (Laughing) Bride"

Robyn Quaker wrote 35 days ago

Slow Poison by Casimir Greenfield
Powerful, dark and well written.
The six are so menacing and the dialogue just about sums them up.
'Wild things, sniffing the cosmopolitan air like rutting beasts.' Brilliant.

The man likes quality. The description of Fred Farthing is good. Janet, all M&S and Waitrose evokes a wonderful image.

However besides the writing, description and dialogue being good you write an interesting story albeit dark and mysterious. High stars and on my watchlist. You will no doubt get this published.

Robyn Quaker
Halfpennies And Blue Vinyl

troy1174 wrote 39 days ago

Wow, I've read the first three chapters of your book so far. Am loving the setting, Amsterdam is an amazing place, being born and living there for a while, I feel an affinity with the city. Will continue reading, and given you high stars too.
Also, the writing style is great, so gritty and descriptive, can't wait to read more

Ian Henson

Task Force

Casimir Greenfield wrote 64 days ago

Daniel - many thanks for including Slow Poison on your stylish virtual bookshelf.

I hope you enjoy reading more...let me know what you think.

All the best, Cas

I like your opening chapter. It is dark, and it makes the reader to want to read on. Backed. Good luck.

Daniel Adams wrote 64 days ago

I like your opening chapter. It is dark, and it makes the reader to want to read on. Backed. Good luck.

Casimir Greenfield wrote 129 days ago

Darius - many thanks for your comments. The book is, as yet, unpublished...I appreciate your encouragement. All the best, Cas

Excellent.
Brilliant introduction and easily followed. All characters (up to CH3) appear as if by magic and slot easily into their allotted space.
I am sure you have had lots of success, sales wise, for this book
and thanks for putting it up here
I shall return!
Darius

Casimir Greenfield wrote 129 days ago

Darius - many thanks for your comments. The book is, as yet, unpublished...I appreciate your encouragement. All the best, Cas

Excellent.
Brilliant introduction and easily followed. All characters (up to CH3) appear as if by magic and slot easily into their allotted space.
I am sure you have had lots of success, sales wise, for this book
and thanks for putting it up here
I shall return!
Darius

Casimir Greenfield wrote 129 days ago

Darius - many thanks for your comments. The book is, as yet, unpublished...I appreciate your encouragement. All the best, Cas

Excellent.
Brilliant introduction and easily followed. All characters (up to CH3) appear as if by magic and slot easily into their allotted space.
I am sure you have had lots of success, sales wise, for this book
and thanks for putting it up here
I shall return!
Darius

Darius Stransky wrote 130 days ago

Excellent.
Brilliant introduction and easily followed. All characters (up to CH3) appear as if by magic and slot easily into their allotted space.
I am sure you have had lots of success, sales wise, for this book
and thanks for putting it up here
I shall return!
Darius

Casimir Greenfield wrote 130 days ago

Lucy - many thanks for your comments. The book is dark, and remains so throughout I'm afraid... Just one of those stories that came out.

To lighten the mood, have a look at my charity video on YouTube (under my real name of David Ireland) I'm not all bad... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pe3T8NC0E-E All the best, Cas

I have just read eleven chapters of your book. It is so dark and most of the characters are so twisted and cruel, it is intriguing but disturbing at the same time. To be honest, i cant bear to read any more. It is really well put together, which cant have been easy as it is such a complex story with so many threads together. Your writing is powerful and i am sure it will stay with me for some time, but it is too dark for me. I wish you all the best with it. Lucy s

Izmir49 wrote 130 days ago

I have just read eleven chapters of your book. It is so dark and most of the characters are so twisted and cruel, it is intriguing but disturbing at the same time. To be honest, i cant bear to read any more. It is really well put together, which cant have been easy as it is such a complex story with so many threads together. Your writing is powerful and i am sure it will stay with me for some time, but it is too dark for me. I wish you all the best with it. Lucy s

Steve Clark wrote 134 days ago

One feels the darkness of this story from the opening paragraph. Slow Poison weaves a convoluted path that is at once confusing and intriguing. "The man" introduced in the opening line stays as a common thread through the first four chapters and, I assume, will continue to do so until his identity and purpose are revealed later in the book. If one enjoys noire reading that borders on the horror genre, Slow Poison shows significant promise.

The story could benefit from some sentence restructuring. The first paragraph could be put a little less awkwardly. This same writing pattern is seen in later paragraphs as well. In each instance, all the right words are there, just not put in quite the most effective order.

The way the story switches scenes can sometimes be a bit confusing. I would have started the 2nd chapter at where Fred's backstory began. In my opinion, the first two or three paragraphs of the 2nd chapter would more fittingly be placed at the end of the first chapter.

The scenes describing Freds' confrontation with the young punks on the stair are excellent. The descriptions of Den's fear are compelling.

I might suggest the author submit the work to a good content (developmental) editor to correct some of the structural elements of story. Overall, from the four chapters I read, this book has great potential. Just a few tweeks in the the dialogue and narrative would make all the difference in projecting this book to the top of the heap.

Steve
All The Pretty Dresses.


Casimir Greenfield wrote 163 days ago

Well...that's a great start to my day! I hope you are able to read right through...there is a twist in the last couple of pages that tilts the story off its axis. Enjoy the read and many thanks for backing the book.

This is quite the intrigue, 6 chapters in and I don't have a clue (yet) where this is headed except 'the man' has a plan amongst several parallel threads. Wreaking havoc is the theme, from Fred, the hooligans, and especially the man. It's hooked me and I back it.

elle
Diary of a Bad Housewife

sensual elle wrote 163 days ago

This is quite the intrigue, 6 chapters in and I don't have a clue (yet) where this is headed except 'the man' has a plan amongst several parallel threads. Wreaking havoc is the theme, from Fred, the hooligans, and especially the man. It's hooked me and I back it.

elle
Diary of a Bad Housewife

bdblanton wrote 183 days ago

Chapter 1. The story began like a hurricane blowing through and didn't stop until the chapter ended. I enjoy a fast start and pace, as well as how it conflicted with the relative "quiet" of the couples' dinner. You set the tone well for more conflict between raw and refined. I had to stop and repeat sentences a few times due to the number of metaphors, characters and details introduced early. Not a read for early morning before coffee. If blurry confusion and a sense of being out of control was your goal, you achieved it. Well done. I look forward to reading more and seeing how your characters clash. Thanks. BD

Edweedison wrote 204 days ago

You're welcome and yes, I am enjoying your book. I like how the characters interact and you give them true to life dialog instead of uptight proper that some writers feel they need to. We know that nobody actually speaks formally and we all use slang. The story moves right along without any low points which, as a reader, is always a plus. Nobody wants to get bored while trying to read.

Casimir Greenfield wrote 211 days ago

Hi Sid - thanks for your comments. The capitalisation is definitely one of those automatic spell checker things, the punctuation is me. Thanks for pointing everything out.

Hope you enjoy the story if you get the chance to read on.

Regards, Cas.

Hi Casimir,

Slow Poison is a very intriguing story, lots of well-paced drama, interesting characters and intense situations really draw the reader in and moves the story along at a frantic pace.
My only gripe would be the way you close off your speech, for example:
this!', said Fred
good!', laughed Becky
you!' He whispered.
well.' Said Janet
this!', Said Fred
I don't think you need the extra comma after the closing speech mark and the capital letter is not required.
Otherwise a great story, one to watch going forward.
Regards,
Sid

Sid Lyons wrote 211 days ago

Hi Casimir,

Slow Poison is a very intriguing story, lots of well-paced drama, interesting characters and intense situations really draw the reader in and moves the story along at a frantic pace.
My only gripe would be the way you close off your speech, for example:
this!', said Fred
good!', laughed Becky
you!' He whispered.
well.' Said Janet
this!', Said Fred
I don't think you need the extra comma after the closing speech mark and the capital letter is not required.
Otherwise a great story, one to watch going forward.
Regards,
Sid

Chris 1 wrote 234 days ago

You portray Amsterdam oh, so accurately. (I used to love that town before the stag nights/hen do's got their mitts on it). But, more than that, I enjoyed the way you got to grips with your characters who, initially, came across as unsympathetic but, given the closer look you provide, soon become more rounded characters with depth, and a deeply harrowing past.

I also like the way you keep coming back to the 'old man's diary'. The reader knows that something is brewing in the background and will, at some stage, come bursting through to the foreground. It's an excellent way of holding the interest AND giving the story broader scope. BACKED

Lara wrote 289 days ago

YARGIII

This is a powerful book with some powerful images, as might be expected from the violence portrayed in some chapters. There are other emotions besides horror, however, and the sections where the MC and Janet interact work well. There is sadness and sex too. I liked the subterreanean feel of the horror, worse than buckets of blood.
There are different themes interwoven all seething away under the main action. So well done for a good read.
Backed.

Rosalind Minett
A RELATIVE INVASION
SPEECHLESS

Geowonderland wrote 298 days ago

Casimir,
I personally don't like reading books with foul language. I don't know if this is your style of writing or my English as second language, but I'm having hard time following your story.
Best wishes,
Aneta

Luke Bramley wrote 303 days ago

Like it, solid, dark, real - a well edited piece with a genuine sense of place - it's on the list ready to be shelved. I feel like Fred's going to get his head kicked in down in that toilet and then you switch to flashback - you got me!

Casimir Greenfield wrote 345 days ago

Margaret - thank you for you insightful comments. I realise my book is not to everyone's taste - but it was written with heart and passion and I feel I have ended up with writing that has an elegance whilst dealing with ugly subject matter.

The 'bulls' phrase you picked up on stems from my poetic side - there are probably more of those phrases dotted throughout the book.

Thank you for your continued support. With your help I might even reach the desk so that I can clear the way to add my new book to the lists.

All the best, Cas

Very well written even though this is not my kind of book! Nevertheless I still have to admire the standard of writing and the way you build the suspense as the story progresses. Right from the start with the shadowy figure in the background and then the drunkenness of the’six’ followed by the typical behaviour of the ‘four’ the story draws in the reader – in my case, almost against my will!

I did not spot any grammar/spelling errors. The only phrase which jarred with me was ‘Bulls they were, looking for china shops.’ I thought this would read better ‘They were like bulls – looking for china shops.’ That’s only a personal view of course.

I have been away from authonomy for a long time but your book remained on my watch list throughout that period. It will remain there for the foreseeable future.

Great writing and sorry I have taken so long to take a look!

God bless you
Margaret
How do I know God answers prayer?

Margaret0307 wrote 345 days ago

Very well written even though this is not my kind of book! Nevertheless I still have to admire the standard of writing and the way you build the suspense as the story progresses. Right from the start with the shadowy figure in the background and then the drunkenness of the’six’ followed by the typical behaviour of the ‘four’ the story draws in the reader – in my case, almost against my will!

I did not spot any grammar/spelling errors. The only phrase which jarred with me was ‘Bulls they were, looking for china shops.’ I thought this would read better ‘They were like bulls – looking for china shops.’ That’s only a personal view of course.

I have been away from authonomy for a long time but your book remained on my watch list throughout that period. It will remain there for the foreseeable future.

Great writing and sorry I have taken so long to take a look!

God bless you
Margaret
How do I know God answers prayer?

Alex Kuhnberg wrote 384 days ago

Hello Casimir

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery -- since I started reading this I have remodelled the first part of my YA novel Shady Lane to include a flash-forward prologue pitching the reader directly into a key part of the action.

I think you handle the unpeeling process brilliantly. It is an unpleasant story -- definitely not one for the squeamish -- but engrossing throughout, not least because it exposes the processes of evil without being in any way judgemental.

Paris Singer wrote 395 days ago

Hello, Casimir;

I am very much enjoying reading your novel. It is beautifully dark; honestly voiced and characterised with an unapologetic tone that, to me, resonates of Hemingway slightly.
The flow of the story is good, as is the change of perspectives. There is a wonderful sense of intrigue that makes you want to continue reading.
The only typo I picked up was on chapter one:
" He watched with a mixture pain and bemusement..." You missed out 'of'.
Highest stars, sir. Very well done.

David

MJpaq wrote 397 days ago

Good thriller with a strong plot and interesting idea. The character development is good, and you have constant conflict both in the storyline and dialogue. I truly enjoyed reading your book. high stars.

Lyn4ny wrote 428 days ago

This is not my usual genre here but very good start in chapter one. Well written with great characters.it's very descriptive and keeps you reading. I hope to get back to it soon. High Stars. Would love a return read sometime. Thanks for sharing your story with us. Best of luck to you!

Lyn

Bryon1963 wrote 436 days ago

Casimir,

I just finished chapter 1, poor Fred to have a sense of humor. I have found this somewhat dark but also you added some humor. The characters have a strong connection to each other that extends to the reader.

Best wishes,
Bryon Decker

Ranger wrote 450 days ago

Strong start and really powerful descriptions. Only part that seemed out of place was how you introduced the six those two lines... other than that, awesome start ;)

Casimir Greenfield wrote 450 days ago

Frank - many thanks for your input. Slow Poison is not the easiest of reads, but a book of which I'm proud. All the best, Cas

Sorry, it took me a long time to get around to reading this. But well done. Dark overtones, some horrific stuff, but sometimes that is how the world is. Good weaving together of story ideas. Highly starred.
Frank

Frank Talaber wrote 450 days ago

Sorry, it took me a long time to get around to reading this. But well done. Dark overtones, some horrific stuff, but sometimes that is how the world is. Good weaving together of story ideas. Highly starred.
Frank

Cathy Hardy wrote 460 days ago

Your book is flawlessly written, very dark and dismal, but fascinating and interesting none the less. Lots of twists and turns, which makes one want to read on. There are many different aspects to this book, which takes vivid imagination. Top stars!!

Andrea Taylor wrote 461 days ago

Beautifully written, stunningly observed, this has to be the very best book I have read on Authonomy. The maturity of the writing puts us lesser mortals to shame. If a publisher doesn't pick this up there is no justice in the world. I dont have a negative comment to make, this is faultless.
Andrea
The de Amerley Affair

Casimir Greenfield wrote 466 days ago

Sean - thanks for your kind comments - let me know what you think if you read on. Your book is already on my shelf. All the best, Cas

Casimir, Very interesting and so well put together. I wouldnt normally read anything like this but on this occasion I am glad i did. It has a lot going for it in that it can be dark as well as compelling and you have chosen your moments well. This tells me you ave planned this book out well before you started. I can see also that you have done your homework well to. I enjoyed it and am going to see how this does in the future. Well done High score.
Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R). Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you? Happy New Year. Sean

Seringapatam wrote 466 days ago

Casimir, Very interesting and so well put together. I wouldnt normally read anything like this but on this occasion I am glad i did. It has a lot going for it in that it can be dark as well as compelling and you have chosen your moments well. This tells me you ave planned this book out well before you started. I can see also that you have done your homework well to. I enjoyed it and am going to see how this does in the future. Well done High score.
Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R). Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you? Happy New Year. Sean

Casimir Greenfield wrote 467 days ago

Many thanks for your interest. Let me know how you find the story as it unfolds. All the best, Cas

http://casgreenfield.blogspot.co.uk/

I finished reading the beginning of a very intrigueing story. Your writing is tight with no unnecessary words to describe not only the scene but also the characters.
The rythm of your prose matches the tone of the story.
Great job. I will continue to read.

SL

SL Dwyer wrote 467 days ago

I finished reading the beginning of a very intrigueing story. Your writing is tight with no unnecessary words to describe not only the scene but also the characters.
The rythm of your prose matches the tone of the story.
Great job. I will continue to read.

SL

Jackie McLean wrote 499 days ago

Hi, I've just read the opening chapter. You describe very well the darker side to Amsterdam, and the harshness of living in Saudi. It's a well-portrayed brutal opening, with plenty intrigue to make the reader want to go on. Well done with this.

Jackie
Toxic