The Blackberry Season

The Blackberry Season offers a deeply authentic look into Isobel's birth through her father's eyes. I found David a bit of a mystery, and the scene will rich with texture. Loved the old woman with her cig. There's just a subtle hint that David and his wife didn't quite relate, and so the quick segue to chapter 2 was intriguing. We now meet the baby, Isobel, now a girl in her teens. More questions than answers here, and I found that appealing. I like the girl - she's a typical adolescent in some ways, but readers will perceive the sad layers beneath, and I'm especially curious to find out why David has not been there for her - this baby he was so enamored with.

Beautifully written, crisp and clean sentences, and great characterizations this far. I would quickly buy this story based on what I've read so far. Brava
Lizzi
God of Wine

From the beautiful and heart-warming first chapter of the birth of a baby to the sad and disturbing funeral scene of the second chapter. Written so realistically and not overly dramatic but certainly magnetic unfolding of the story. I am almost mesmerized by those opening chapters. How Isobel saw the funeral guests and the priest with helpless irritation is so real, I felt I was looking at them with my own eyes.
I have no suggestion for a change so far, and reading on.

R

The pitch is quite intriguing, and I think you could have more hooking-in potential, so to speak, if you told us just a tiny bit more about what will or might unfold when she uncomfortably joins this cold, unwelcoming household. The set-up as described is nice and tense and clear, but what exactly will be at stake later is not so clear at all. That could make a meaningful addition to your pitch perhaps, just to hint at what's down the road for her. Since you have the space, I'd use every last bit of it. I'm curious what gets her through, what does she hang onto, and what's her light at the end of this tunnel.

I read the first chapter, which is all I ever have time for on this site, and I have to say I was really charmed by the style. I know there is a darker tale ahead, but this is such a very sweetly told beginning that I have been swept into caring about this poor child, the one who's going to have such a hard cold time later.

I wish I had time to read more, but I want to say I admire your talent and wish you well.

Eileen Kay
Noodle Trails

Cecily, Wow, I really enjoyed this and certainly not what I expected. There is a really good book happening here. A good description of all the characters you have chosen to use which is really good on the readers eyes and thats why I got so hooked into this book. I couldnt put it down at one stage. The flow of the book and the pace of the story is fantastic. You have a way with this genre that works well. Well done big score.
Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R) Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you. Thanks very much Sean

Very well written. It has a hint of mystery that laces through the words, as if things arent quite right. Clever. Its hard to write scenes that have been done so many times before and keep our attention, but you had no problem at all! High stars
Andrea
The de Amerley Affair

‘The Blackberry Season’
Ch 1 - Strong beginning setting the scene subtly. The emotional responses to a newborn come over well. Those of us who’ve been through this will resonate with this.
I loved ‘He’d read poetry to her, send her off to sleep every night on a wave of beautiful words.’ Gorgeous imagery. Is the repetition of ‘caveman thing/s’ intentional? The reference to ‘blackberry bruises’ is lovely. ‘I can’t do the whole name thing without chocolate’ – beautifully observed. Tidy and inviting first chapter. The optimism, the launching forward as a family comes over well. One feels a ‘but’ coming along…

Ch 2 – A pleasing surprise to find ourselves fifteen years on. Intriguing relationship issues emerging between father and daughter – good conflict development with a hook, making us read on to unpick the story. ‘He was called Gordon, which was just one of his problems’ made me laugh. ‘Reedy old voices’ – bang on.
Change of p.o.v. works well. Slight distancing in the balance towards tell rather than show but still beautifully told. ‘The dirt bruised the white roses when it fell’ – nice symbolism. I loved the concept of the buried priest and the grandmother joining his skeletal congregation. You keep us teased over David and Isobel. Good.

Ch 3 – I felt direct action/dialogue would create more impact than telling us what happened after the funeral – at least a few lines to bring us directly into the dramatic conflict here. This is a big issue between father and daughter. ‘London: the City of Things’ – oh, how true that is to those of us living in a small seaside town!
Lovely details of the photographs and the button tin – so human and real.
I wondered what feelings Isobel had at dropping the key through the door – so final and symbolic a moment, no turning back. The smell of the roses was poignant for me as I remember leaving my own grandmother’s roses behind, her pride and joy, and wishing the same care for them. Unusual and strong perceptions over the proximity of father and daughter in the car and body awareness.
Nice implied link over the brambles over the grave and blackberries. ‘Dinosaur backs of the islands’ – how accurate and evocative.
At last some of David’s story is coming out – nicely controlled, keeping us on the line. ‘She stole quick secret glances’ – exactly carries the tension. Apt comparison of father and daughter’s physical features here vs after the birth.
Synaesthesia – added interest value here.
Clever turn-around of daughter prickly about father’s silence and how he toys with her feelings. How funny, I’m looking at a picture now, on my shelf, of my brother and I in our duffle coats in Trafalgar Square – we have pigeons on our heads and wrists. You pick out the defining essentials of an arrival in London, contrasting them to the Scottish space very well. As I leave the book, for a while, I am left wanting to know more about David and his relationship and how Isobel will fit in. I am, of course, keen to know what happened to Paula.

Minor quibbles only. I find sentences like ‘“You’re welcome,” he beamed at her’ a bit odd ‘cos how can you beam words at someone? I tend to write ‘”You’re welcome.” He beamed at her.’ Again, ‘Paula tugged away, “Don’t… my hair’s all sweaty.”’ – would a full stop rather than the comma work better? Again, ‘Ten-thirty,” one word answers’. It is good not to have the ‘he/she said’ all the time, though.
I wondered if some of the filtering words could be dropped, e.g. notice in ‘he was starting to notice things about his fellow smokers’ but on reflection this brings us into the character’s inner process. ‘He thought she looked happy’, however, does distance us a little from the m.c. in a way that ‘She looked happy’ does not.
A separating comma is needed to isolate the name after ‘you’ in, ‘”She looks like you Paula.” (I had loads of these until Alan Chaput kindly pointed them out!)
Overall, a wonderful and intriguing start to what promises to be a well studied exploration of relationships. The writing is of a high standard and errors hard to spot. My only desire would be to see less ‘tell’ and more ‘show’ – i.e. more direct speech and action. Excellent work – top stars and on my shelf.
Nick
‘Where She Lies’

Backing this having read it some while ago. Love the relationships and the associations in the scenic descriptions. It shouldn't have a red arrow! Lara
A RELATIVE INVASION

The setting is familiar to most people, and so it grabs the reader immediately. The birth of a baby is also familiar, and it sets a happy scene. You include details which also keep the reader's interest - Oncology, etc.,and makes the reader feels he is actually there on the scene.

The dialogue is authentic and sounds real. The quality of the writing in general, is very good and clear, and gives the reader many titbits to wonder about. I like the caveman thing ... it happens! And so it feels spot on and when men become very protective of their offspring and partner. I will read more some time later. If there is anything you wish me to read in particular, please message me.

Good luck with this.
Marilyn

Beautifully written, a tale of involved relationships pressing you to read on. Lara
A RELATIVE INVASION

Hi Cecily,

I liked Isobel because I thought she's sweet and care for her parents so much. She's determined at a very young age, the attitude I think young people these says must possess. Aside from being a very good family tale, I think this one is a good inspiration for kids Isobel's age. They can absolutely learn from her and apply that in their own lives.

The sad happenings in her life were brought to life beautifully. The writing style is outstanding and the pace just right for this kind of story. It's not a vampire story or any of that sort, but it has it's own beautiful elements that deserves young readers' attention. I wish you get published. Highly starred!

May I invite you to read and rate my book as well? Thank you in advance for your help!

D
LEO & ROVER: THE PURPLE MARBLE ADVENTURES

Your writing is good. I only saw a missing comma here or there, no big deal. The first chapter was heavy with words I was unfamiliar with as an American, made it a slow going, but as a whole the first chapter was very good. I enjoyed the "joy" of the birth and the happiness of moment. Then you just left it with David going to get candy. I read through Chapter Four to try and find out what happened, but nothing. So, for the time it was left for my imagination and I couldn't figure out how Isobel (if that is the baby) could have gone 15 years without seeing her father. I couldn't imagine how when David loved his wife so much he would abandon his child and never visit her again, go off, marry another woman, have another child. And then I didn't want to figure it out, I wanted to be told, but soon enough I figured that it was such an implausible situation that a man that had no "mental demons," very bad habits or a bout with prison would leave his daughter that I stopped wondering. You don't even describe Isobel. Did she look like her mother? Did she have blonde hair and skinny legs? It would have been nice to know. Did her mother die? How? It would have been nice to know? Was David so distraught that he just left his daughter? I think that if you answer those questions early on (before Chapter 4) you will keep the reader engaged longer.

Good start.

Abby

The Blackberry Season Chapters 1-9
It was enjoyable to read your fine story again.. I felt for Isobel as she was thrown into such a difficult situation and could feel Stella's isolation and insecurity. Jessica is very well drawn and realistic, as is the seemingly cold and uncaring David. You hooked me because I care about about Isobel, Stella and Jessica, but also because I want to learn why David changed from the doting father he seemed to be in Chapter One, to the cold remote figure he has become in London.
There are many phrases and passages that I found powerful and thought-provoking, but one that stands out was when Stella waits for Jessica to come out of school. She's avoiding the other mothers (as they sit in their BMWs etc)and wonders if she's now one of the to be avoided mothers. Your list of mothers in this group was horribly true (all the fat mothers, the seriously anorexic, those with mental issues...) It is so cruel, so painful and as you say, a mirror of the playground. Very astute writing!

A few minor nitpicks:
Chapter 1
Just a suggestion. How about that first sentence "My wife's had the baby." standing alone? What follows could be a new paragraph.
The paragraph that begins "The woman smiled then." : there's a repetition of the word then. Do you need the 2nd "then" in the woman's question?
Chapter 3.
In 4th paragraph, there's a repetition of "enough". Could you rephrase it?

Have given The Blackberry Season 6 stars and will keep it on my shelf for as long as possible.
Cherry
The Girl From Ithaca

What are the elements that spell 'good book' as soon as you start to read? This book has them for me: depth of characterisation; engaging story; clear, unpretentious prose - including dialogue that sounds right; and the unique, undefinable, but certainly recognisable, style or 'voice' of the writer. When I read the lines of the Plath poem in Ch. 1 I knew I was in for a rich treat, and wasn't disappointed. I particularly enjoyed the detail of Isobel's first night and day at her new home in London, with all its urban cool - baffling to Isobel - and about the way that she begins to assert her own personality into the family.

Cecily is very good at getting below the surface and highlighting the tensions and unresolved personal issues that quietly sizzle: Stella and David's relationship in particular.

Ch.3: close proximity words '...easily enough; ....soon enough'

Good writing; I will keep this on watchlist and shelve it very soon. This one really does deserves to get to the desk.

Colin Neville

Hi Cecily,

Finally managed to get you onto my book shelf. Your writing is very fluid and your characterisation convincing. Good luck with your continued progress on this site.

If you get a chance to read/comment on Elastic Girl it would be much appreciated.

Thks, Olivia

have read the first two chapters so far and am most impressed with the quality of your prose, well above the average on this site. Vivid description and characterisation too. Really nothing to criticise so far. It goes on my bookshelf. Four stars for now as incomplete, but I am sure I will upgrade it when there is more.
I would very much value any comments you have to make on my novel Absalom.
Victoria Miles
ABSALOM

I read your first two chapters and am devastated, as I need to go do some real life things. This is so good that I am simply going to have to read more. I love your descriptions with David smoking outside, the things he said about his new daughter, and then Isobel at the grave. "Dirt bruised the red roses when it fell", and "...grave digger going on and on about the 'correct' depth..." Wow, I'm impressed by all of this. Just wanted to tell you before I left it. I will read more again later, but I loved what I saw so far!

Kara
A Gate Called Beautiful

Your opening chapter sets many hooks in my curiosity. “No more half-measures…” leads me to believe he hasn’t been a very good father-to-be, Paula’s description of how babies resemble the father at first, makes me wonder if there has been an affair, “…a lot of waiting and not much doing…” The fact that a new mother has skinny legs. In my world, you’ve got to be a heroin addict or some kind of freak to have skinny legs while giving birth. At the end of this chapter, I believe the relationship between the parents is in peril and they both know it. When David chants to himself “they’d be fine” I half expect him to find the doors and walk out into the night air.

In the second chapter we meet Isobel through the limited third-person. She has clearly not formed a relationship with David, who continues to be waiting and not doing. In the second chapter, “…but they didn’t come and say anything…” might work better if it said “…but they didn’t come and they didn’t say anything.”
The end of the final paragraph of chapter two is beautiful. “…now her grandparents were back in their pew.” So sad yet so apt.

The bit about London being the city of Things tells me that Isobel is in need of the opposite of things. Nicely done.

In Chapter 3 Isobel wonders about her lack of resemblance to her father—a further suggestion that they might not even be related. Which would make his decision to take her all the more poignant.

The headline on the newspaper again refers to the ways families interact. I’m reminded of Bright Lights, Big City.

I love your long, languid sentences. They create a sort of dreamlike atmosphere, especially perfect for Isobel’s leaving her home and traveling to London. The writing is just beautiful.

Mushroom tart and radicchio. Good heavens. I give Stella credit for preparing a meal to welcome Isobel, but her blunders—offering a child wine!—are such hapless blunders.

“Who knew that the rich were so uncomfortable?” Some of these lines are pure gold.

The conversation Isobel overhears is priceless. Yes, David was cold. But he wasn’t the only one. I think Jessica’s visit is very sweet. It’s odd how Jessica is the only one to reach out and both David and Stella pretty much squelch her enthusiasm.

Chapter 6 now. I certainly hope these poor, desperate people begin to show some affection, if not for each other, then for someone…

Jess asks if Isobel is Catholic and then Stella says she’s entitle to believe whatever she wants. In both cases, you use very similar phrases to introduce the similes. I think they could get different phrases.

David has clearly changed if he’s now a barrister (and not an electrician). I had him pegged as a sort of slacker in the first chapter.

When I began reading Grandmother Bower’s description, I was thinking, “Not another bird woman Cecily, please not another!” But then you write “another bird woman” and I laughed.

The absence of stuff in this house so clearly shows the absence of affection among the people. I particularly like the paragraph where everyone is washed through to the sitting room.

My mother is an opinionated German woman, so I am immediately drawn to Jeanne. She is outspoken yet both David and Stella seem intent on bringing it out rather than simply humoring her. And the fact that she was being offensive wafted right by me, because she’s so very much like my mother.

Each time Stella prepares food, it’s exactly the wrong thing. She prepares what she’s read about in the papers, not what nourishes people.

Where Stella is waiting for Jessica after school, she views the other moms as “cocooned in their German cages…” what a perfect image. And it’s so true—moms do all sorts of nutty things while waiting for their kids that they’d never dream of doing in public!

As Stella considers Isobel and the relationship they have formed, she shows not the slightest inkling that it’s important to show a person love. Very interesting. It’s making her seem incredibly immature and selfish, though we knew that already. She also seems to be living in the shadow of David’s first wife, which intrigues me because from Isobel’s perspective David may as well have never met Paula.

“…that was a fleeting visit…” needs a capital.

“…more empty food then that…’ should be than.

Stella remembers ‘wasting money on tiny cashmere’ cardigans. What an interesting partner to the ones Isobel packed of her grandmother’s, ones her grandmother had been saving for best, and which she knew she’d never wear. The tiny ones are useless and the grandmother’s symbolize love.

Well, now I’ve read the entire thing. The only negative I can come up with is this: yes, this is literary fiction, but the pace is mighty slow. You can count on me to sit and read nine languid chapters and marvel at your prose, but I’m not sure everyone will do it.

Best of luck to you here on Authonomy—though you won’t be needing any luck. I’ll have you on my WL for future backing.
~AudreyB
Forgiveness Fits

I’ve just taken a second look at The Blackberry Season and am still impressed by your writing, some lovely ‘dabs’ as Ron/Orlando would say, original word combinations, neat little turns of phrase. You engaged me from the start and carried me with you wanting to know more, to discover how it all turns out, to learn exactly what caused David’s character to change as it has. All your characters are strongly delineated and credible and you portrayal of everyday life is finely observed. I can see this appealing to a wide range of readers and, if I’m right, with the right publisher I think The Blackberry Season could become a great commercial success.

Good luck.
Ellie

BLACKBERRY SEASON
I like this story. Isobel is a good main character; it’s plain from the beginning how difficult it’s going to be for her to move in with her father in London. He’s definitely not a friendly man. I like the way you described the funeral; not a lot of detail, just enough your reader can appreciate what was happening; concentrating instead on Isobel’s feelings of loss and helplessness. Well written. Same with the description of David’s house: beautiful, but not inviting. A good read, I’m starring this and adding it to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

I hope that you will continue writing this story. I enjoyed reading all the chapters you have posted. The words of character description you choose are almost poetic, and very believable, and the interactions between the family members feel achingly true and realistic.
Now that I've finished reading what you have uploaded here I do wonder about your long pitch -and if perhaps there ought to be a mention of Isobel's step mom, Stella, as she has much more of a voice in this story than Isobel's father.
There are a number of punctuation errors here and there that stopped the easy flow of the read, but nothing jarring, and in the last chapter there is a duplicate paragraph as well. (the one which mentions the tiny cashmere cardigans)
I am putting this one on my shelf, giving it high marks and hoping you will get back to finishing the book soon.

Hi, Cecily. I've read the first five chapters of your book in just one season. It's an absorbing story, and I am so impressed with how well you've drawn your characters. It sounds like the book is going to be a winner! It was actually the title that drew me here in the first place, and I'm so glad to have the chance to read it.
The only problems I noticed were some grammar things, mostly punctuation. I'd think it would be good to have a reputable proofreader take a look at it to be an extra pair of eyes for you.
Isobel is wonderful, and I also love the effective details you include--like the hospital stamp on the blanket the woman wraps up in during the first chapter. I want to know what happened to the mother, too!
I certainly hope I can find this story on a bookstore shelf someday.
~Hannah ("Rosalia"/"Carolina and Hubert")

From the opening chapter to the last online, I was enthralled with the plot and the characters. A superb read. Can't wait to read more chapters.
Bridget
The Road from Makhonjwa

This is beautiful, beautiful writing. My first read here and enjoying a lot!

This hooked me right away. Your style is engaging and confident although you are painting a very awkward picture. I was drawn in for the first five chapters, unable to stop reading! I know this story will play on my mind; you've set up plenty of things I need to know more about. I'm intrigued to find out just how this family adapts to the change of Isobel joining it.

great book about relationships and draws the reader in straight away with a hint of mystery an intriguing characters. well done...
j
what every woman should know

Oh my goodness - I just checked you out for a bit of displacement activity and I'm hooked after four chapters. Where's her mum? Beautiful writing style, great personal observations, compelling storyline so far. Well done on being highlighted on the Wednesday one to watch.

Well starred and on my shelf for a spell.

If you really live in Hampstead you might enjoy some of Sit, Stay, Leave! which is set in this area too. Best wishes, and good luck.

Cecily,
Review based on first three chapters. Lovely writing. Glad to have the blurb to go by, since you're writing is one of slow, careful discovery. I appreciate the vivid details of the things Isobel will miss, the strained relation between her and David. It was nice to have the new baby scene to see David's loving reaction to his little daughter. The questions of how and why he abandoned her are wonderful hooks to pull the reader along. Of course, the bigger question is will they establish a loving relationship.
High stars. Good luck with your writing.
Janet
The Milche Bride
Clarissa's Kitchen

Beautiful writing! This is of literary quality, managing to be lush without ever going purple, and giving us a real intimate feeling for the main characters, making them human. I don't see anything to criticize. Best of luck with this!
Tod

http://authonomy.com/books/40646/the-lost-wink/

The Blackberry Season. Succinct pitches, which tellme what to expect.
I make notes as I read, but dont pretend to bean expert. I tend to notice nits - hope you dont mind.
Ch.1. Perhaps a bit of descriptive atmosphere could be included in that opening scene? The dialogue is natural, and the opening sentence fine, but I couldnt make out where David was until well down the first page - which was distracting.
Do you want nits? Unnecessary words tend to disturb the flow of a work, like usually (Ch.2) just.
I like the aggressive sound of her cough.
An opening chapter which already hints of problems to come, and makes me want to read on.
But it's nothing like what's promised in the pitches.

Ch.2. This is a suddenstep forwards in time. I wonder what the old people at the funeral were wanting to"practice"?
You convey Isobel's confusion and depression well through her thoughts.

Ch.3. Had Isobel been living with her grandmother? It's not entirely clear.
Like that sentence where she looked back at the house and the house looked back at her.
Then the narrativeslows the story down as they drive to the airport, in long paragraphs.
But Istill want to read on.

Ch.4. You have some very unusual and apt descriptive phrases - David looking "like a prawn out of its shell" - great words.
Perhaps you should run a search on the number of times you start a sentence with "She". And the "was"s as well.
And now I learn Isobel's age. Perhaps it could have been divulged a bit earlier?

You have a pleasing, easy style of writing, and I find myself identifying with Isobel. But the action slows somewhat, and there are some rather long paragraphs which could possibly be broken up.
Building a story is always time-consuming, but with perseverance, I'm sure you will succeed. There arent many nits to address.

Please forgive me for being so slow to respond to your request for a read.
Jane (Breath of Africa)

A book of beautifully observed relationships and subtly described characters. I would love to have a little bit more description of the setting and characters early on to build the scenes but that's just me. I prefer 'all right' to 'alright' but again that's me. This is confident, well-assured writing and I loved the world created here. So believable and engaging. I'm pleased to back this and give a high rating.
Jo

The Blackberry Season
A great title and a particularly swift, satisfying read. This is a story that probes right to the heart of a typical modern family dilemma.
Chapter 1 Spring 1993.
The story starts off with the birth of Isobel. Her parents: her mother, the mysterious Paula, her father, the emotionally detached David. I particularly liked the clever words Paula used - "it's a sort of caveman thing that babies appear to look like their fathers for just a week or two after being born. It stops them being rejected; the father knows it's his baby."
Chapter 2 Spring 2008
Now teenager, Isobel's plight begins at the funeral of her grandma, when her father turns up to whisk her away from the simple safe life she'd lived in a Scotish village. Now it's to be the big wide world of urban Hampstead life. In the house with David and Stella you could cut the atmosphere with a knife, it appeared that thick. I felt sorry for Isobel, listening in to the row between those downstairs : Stella telling David he was out of order, being so cold and unwelcoming to his daughter.
Maybe Stella will turn out okay, be an ally for Isobel.
Jessica comes across a little handful - and nosy.
I read all that was posted and would have liked to have read on because it left me wanting more. I've backed it but felt it could do with a little more description : a bit more about how the characters look, and the house in Hampstead Heath and surrounding area.
The sentence structure was great. I never once ran out of breath, but in certain chapters - take eight for example - the paragraphs tended to over run in length a little but that is easy to sort out.
It's a lovely read and I would recommend anyone to read The Blackberry Season. Get more up - I want to find out the frightening things in more depth!
Connie
Streets Apart
ps It did give me a chuckle when I read about the old dear with a drip, probably on her last legs but enjoying a drag on her ciggie!

I've just backed your book, Cecily, outstanding writing, but do you really have to support that bloomin' orange cat? Best regards, Ted.

Oh my, I was just having a quick look at your book to see if I wanted to back it, and got completely hooked in to the first two chapters! If I wasn't busy having a writing day of my own I'd read on and on Cecily, and I promise to read more of The Blackberry Season very soon.

Beautiful simple language, a very real evocation first of David in Chapter one and then of Isobel in Chapter two - and the reader wonders what on earth has happened in the intervening years to make them such strangers to each other.

I love Isobel, strong and vulnerable at the same time, with a great sadness beneath her spirited character. I'm so looking forward to reading on with this. Highly starred and backed.

I picked this book randomly. I'm glad I did. It's beautifully written and gripping. Don't change a thing.

Hello, Cecily

I took your advice and enjoyed the sunshine over the weekend, cold beer for him and rose for me. Very nice:)

Today, I had an extended lunch hour and took the opportunity to finish what you have here. The problem with Authonomy is incomplete books. When I read a book I like, I want to read it all, 'incomplete' is VERY frustrating.

With that bit out of the way I can now tell you how much I like this. It's a story that appeals very much to my heart. The writing is wonderful, easy, comfortable, clever. I am so completely at home with it. And I'm inside Isobel, aware of her emotions almost as if they are mine.

I love this and I really hope I can read more soon :)

Thank you.

Jess

This is something I would buy if it was published - will buy when it is published! I really enjoyed the read. It reminded me of a grown up version of Heidi which I loved as a child. I really feel for Isobel, particularly in the early chapters. The way you describe her reactions to the two priests old and new and her difficulty eating is really involving. The french grandma is a great character and I love the little girl's 'intercontintal' type mistakes and the bear in the kilt that looks as if it could handle itself at pub closing time. There's a lot of humour and the whole thing is beautifully written. When you change to Stella's viewpoint you make her sympathetic too, though I think one's main sympathy remains with Isobel. The contrast from the delight in the first chapter at their baby deity with the later coldness of David is a powerful.
Six stars, obviously and staying on my watchlist for the future.

Really enjoyed The Blackberry Season. You've written it very well and you've captured the characters really well. It's easy reading and immediately I was losing myself in the story. Characters are well defined and the dialogue carries the story along effortlessly. A very good read. Have rated highly and placed on my WL to read more.
Ruth2904 To Dream Again

I adore this book. I started to read planning to look at maybe the first couple of chapters, but I was hooked. I forgot I was 'reviewing' and just enjoyed getting lost in the story. You describe everything so well, and I got a really good sense of who Isobel is. The dialogue is perfect and, five chapters in, I'm desperate to read on and find out what happens next.

Thanks
Sally

This was such a good read. I became completely enveloped in your writing - like a pair of strong arms wrapping themselves around me - lovely. Thank you :)

I hope there will be more to read soon. (No pressure :D)

Michelle

Beautifully written and so easy to read. I immediately sympathised with Isobel. Her awkwardness with David is protrayed so well and yet so economically. It took me back many years to a time when I went through a similar period in life, one I try to forget! Writing of this quality will always resonate with readers.
Good luck
Carol
The Lorestone.

Ahoy there Cecily,

I've had a perusal of your first two chapters, and they were blessedly easy to read and written with a pithy narrative. Just one or two minor grammatical issues. In the pitch, 'fifteen year old' should be hyphenated (as, I believe, should "...took a long last pull on his (half-smoked) cigarette'...) in the opening chapter.

In chapter 2 - "Ten(-)thirty," should also be hyphenated. Congratulations for using the world 'genuflected' - which I've never bleedin' well heard of, and will need to look-up when I've a spare moment.

I thought the line "Frank the nice doctor who was Protestant and gay and was known to prescribe the morning after pill (and who got no thanks for any of that)...was a very amusing and clever piece of writing. That alone warrants six stars.

All in all, I think you have an easy style and an engaging voice, though perhaps it may need the odd tweak to tidy it up a little.

Pete

BLACKBERRY SEASON
This is a really good read. I love the way David has to stop for a cigarette before he even gets to hold his baby and then his wife can’t pick out a name without chocolate. These are my kind of people. I think the best part of this, tho, is your dialogue. It’s crisp and clear and easy to follow. Keeps your story always moving forward. Very sensitively written, it’s a good read. Highly starred and added to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

Hello! I kept seeing the name of this bandied about the forums so thought I'd check it out!

Very much enjoying it - reminds me of reading Sharon Creech when I was a teen. You have a fantastically realised narrative voice throughout, I really think your readers get to build a relationship with Isobel very eary on. There is also a beautiful melancholy running though it.

Some great description in here too, I particularly liked "felt hot and red" and "a parody of family". Your characters are particularly interesting for being seen through Isobel's eyes - already Stella is sympathetic and trying hard, David is cold and standofish. However I think we, the readers, realise what Isobel does not - he's probably just a good man who doesn't really know what he is doing, and thats a testament to the strength of your writing.

I'm highly starring and will keep watching as you upload more - what a horror to have lost it all!

Hi Cecily,

I stumbled across The Blackberry Season by accident and was immediately swept into Isobel's world such that I had quickly reached the end of your published chapters.

The thing you have nailed - which so few people understand, let alone successfully carry off - is being entirely inside your character's head so that right from the beginning, we are immersed in her world. I could say that there was the odd comma missing, especially in the earlier chapters and ask whether you really have to clear Customs after a flight from Inverness to Heathrow but it feels mean to bother raising such points!

The Blackberry Season should be compulsory reading for aspiring writers. It is a Master Class both in terms of how to handle a point of view and how to create an inner world.

Very rarely do I want to lavish stars but here I do so willingly. Well done and good luck,

Sandra-Jane Goddard
The Worst of Lies

Hi Cecily, I just read all posted chapters of Blackberry Season, and really enjoyed them. Your rich language, fine characterisation and incredible insight into the mind (and soul) of a teenage girl are first-rate. Yes, this book is a slow burner - something which my Geminian brain usually runs away from screaming - but it really works, a masterpiece in 'show don't tell' in fact. The questions simply pile up as one reads on - why was Isobel left to her grandparents, why is David so cold to the baby he once adored, why did her mother chose such a 'fucked up, repressed, patronising Englishman who couldn't talk about anything', and why, oh why, are we still none the wiser after 17,000 words? lol. I've only seen one other book on site which left me hanging out so desperately for more (Nat Martin's 'Together Apart') and if HC have got any sense they'll want to publish this one too. 6 stars from me, quite superb!

Joe Kovacs
Ginger the Buddha Cat

(oh, my eye did stick in one place. Chap 2, para 3. You say 'one word sentences' when the preceding dialogue is TWO word sentences - 'I have', 'Ten thirty' etc. Yeah, I know, pernickety me!)

Hi Cecily,
you fully inhabit Isobel's point of view so wonderfully. From her observations about her friends at the funeral to her awkwardness with Stella in Chp 4 and to the very astute and entirely correct opinions on cold KitKats. I like a girl who knows her KitKats!
The writing flows beautifully, there is no unnecessary detail, but the well chosen details you do offer (looking for radicchio) are incredibly telling, at times moving and illustrate your purposes beautifully.
This is calm, flowing and sensitive writing. Well done. My only concern would be that there doesn't seem enough in the long pitch to keep the tension going, to keep the reader wanting to know what happens next. I could be wrong, as I have only read the first 4 chapters. Just a thought.
5 stars from me.
All the best,
Sharda.
I think we were doing a reading swap, so take a look at mine when you have a moment. Would love to hear what you think. http://www.authonomy.com/books/42835/mr-unusually-s-circus-of-dreams/

The Blackberry Season:

Your writing is strangely calming. Soothing away as I read. I became completely immersed in it. I love how you filter in everyday sights. Your observation of life is woven into your story with the utmost care and precision but without the feeling of it being at all contrived.

I want to wrap my arms around Isobel and tell her everything’s going to be fine.

I strive to write like this. Natural. Some of us just don’t have it. Never mind, eh?

I’m going to put this on my shelf. Soon :)

Btw … David is an arse but I kinda like Stella. I'm pretty sure David will redeem himself. Let me know if you upload any more.

Mick

I've read all the chapters uploaded. The quality of writing is excellent and the emotional pull and honesty of the story highly engaging. Some of the observations and descriptions really stood out for me: the Madeleine McCann posters in the airport, the description of the father in casual clothes like a prawn out of his shell - loved that!

This is one of those cases where the prologue is absolutely essential to reading the story. I'm highly interested in knowing what happened to Isobel's mother and how David's hopes came to nothing. I also really liked the pitch. Perhaps a little more foreshadowing in these early chapters in the London house of some of the troubles to come would be good? Just a thought.

Please message me if/when you upload more. I definitely want to see how this story unfolds!

Best,
Kate

Dear Cecily

What a lovely read "The Blackberry Season" is. I found it by accident. It is on one of my friends' shelves....and i am so glad I did. Soothing, peaceful, and beautifully presented, this is a gentle and well observed read to wile away a morning.

Your pace is smooth and unhurried. Your characters are sketched carefully and with a rather beautiful reserve, in the manner of a lot of Scottish literature. Spare, but with care and not a lot of words. That this forces me to slow down as I am reading is rather precious. I hope you upload more chapters so that we can all read on.

All the best for this gem.

Fran :-))

C1: This is a good start. I like the natural flow of your writing. Conversational, easy, nice. I want to feel like David. Newborn babies do things to men ... I know when I held my sister's baby I wanted to smother him in love, kisses and ice cream .. I love ice cream.

I was thrown a bit by the name Stella at the end of the chapter ... I'm sure it's a typo.

I'll read on.

Mick

Hi Cecily, poor Isabel - I feel as if I would like to hug her, comfort her - after all she has no-one else offering it! I thought the chapters I read well written in a crisp, clear style and would like to read more at a later stage. David seems to be a really cold fish, but I suspect there is much more to discover about him as the story unfolds. At the moment though his character seems totally unlikeable and as such he is a good hook to draw the reader in. There is nothing like loathing a character from the get go is there? Good Luck Tina Cox 'Sanctuary'