Book Jacket

 

rank 3426
word count 100075
date submitted 25.04.2012
date updated 28.04.2012
genres: Fiction, Thriller, Crime
classification: adult
complete

Fear and Greed

Milton C. Johns

Murder in a small town, and an investigation complicated by mobsters, bikers, strippers, cops and a disgraced arms dealer

 

Murder in a small town... In 1994, Dave Owens is trying to make sense of a once perfect life that is now in shambles. Fired from a prestigious Washington, D.C. job as an arms dealer and amidst a nasty divorce, he returns to the small town in Pennsylvania where he grew up. Securing work as a part time police officer, he meets and falls for Lori Grant, an exotic dancer. Lori herself is trapped in a dangerous relationship with the leader of a violent motorcycle gang. Dave is soon drawn into the investigation of a double shooting that takes the lives of two friends and shocks the tiny borough. Amidst this chaos, Dave must come to terms with the attention of his uncle Tony, a local businessman of questionable repute, who wants both to help and control Dave at the same time. When Dave makes a startling discovery about the murder, the weave of his new life becomes quickly and violently unraveled.

 
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tags

crime fiction, fiction, gritty, suspense, thriller

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25 comments

 

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TDonna wrote 650 days ago

Milt, I think the first chapter is excellent. The start is great, connecting a reader with a good sense of setting. Wonderful descriptions with vivid imagery. The intro of your characters is super, as well. Although I read only one chapter, I read every word, and it's impeccable. Good flow. Great pace. Good character development, you gave each distinct voices and characteristics. I thought it was interesting and captivating. Will be back to read on :) High stars from me.
Donna
No Kiss Good-bye

MiltEsq wrote 688 days ago

First, just one thing I noticed:
“what about the other guy? Parker,” Dave asked. …reads a bit weird I would suggest “What about the other guy, Parker?” Dave asked.

Honestly, other than that, what I’ve read has been wonderful. Your descriptions are on point and your storyline is gripping right from the start. Shelved and highly rated!

Brittany E.
Melaney and the Mirror



Thank you so much, Brittany!

Brittany Engstrand wrote 689 days ago

First, just one thing I noticed:
“what about the other guy? Parker,” Dave asked. …reads a bit weird I would suggest “What about the other guy, Parker?” Dave asked.

Honestly, other than that, what I’ve read has been wonderful. Your descriptions are on point and your storyline is gripping right from the start. Shelved and highly rated!

Brittany E.
Melaney and the Mirror

MiltEsq wrote 691 days ago

I'm a big fan of detective stories and this is written as well as any I've ever read. You are a professional writer - and I realized that as soon as I started reading your book: "Valley opens it robe to the curious and the converted." You certainly do not need any suggestions from me (nor from anyone else - as far as I'm concerned.) The story of Dave becoming a cop, with flashbacks to earlier school bullying, the love story between Dave and Lori, the delightful early episode with Mrs. Gimble and the sensor device, Chief Kurt Henry, Dave's uncle: all are delightful, captivating. You do a wonderful job of character development, providing local color ("yas" and "youse") and imagery, marvelous dialogue - so natural, never forced nor artificial, and, of course, plot development - I like the unexpected turn. Marvelous ending with Dave (alive - in ch. 14 I was afraid he'd died) and Lori, the B&B in Cantabria, Madrid, and the St. Bernard. Oh, and I felt personal delight at what Dave did with Marv and Walter. Excellent book - this should have already been published!


Pat, thank you so much for your comments - I am humbled and inspired by your review! You have truly made my day! Thanks again! I look forward to dive into your manuscript.

MiltEsq wrote 695 days ago

FEAR AND GREED
This is a book with all the right ingredients for success: a mystery with fear and greed on top of that. For some reason the prologue wouldn’t download for me so I had to start reading at chapter 2 where Dave is introduced. He’s a good main character; likable because of the easy relationship he has with George; sympathetic because of all the problems he has. The conversation with George was a good way to introduce those rather than just having him think out loud about them. This way the scene says a lot about the way he’s still bitter but is trying to move on. But then I think dialogue is your strength; it’s clear and crisp; keeps things moving in your story. Overall, a good read. Highly starred and added to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?


Thanks so much for backing Fear and Greed! I will check out your book!

Wanttobeawriter wrote 695 days ago

FEAR AND GREED
This is a book with all the right ingredients for success: a mystery with fear and greed on top of that. For some reason the prologue wouldn’t download for me so I had to start reading at chapter 2 where Dave is introduced. He’s a good main character; likable because of the easy relationship he has with George; sympathetic because of all the problems he has. The conversation with George was a good way to introduce those rather than just having him think out loud about them. This way the scene says a lot about the way he’s still bitter but is trying to move on. But then I think dialogue is your strength; it’s clear and crisp; keeps things moving in your story. Overall, a good read. Highly starred and added to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

MiltEsq wrote 703 days ago

I ma rating this seven stars.

Isoje David


Thank you so much!!!

Isoje David wrote 703 days ago

I ma rating this seven stars.

Isoje David

Anthony Brady wrote 704 days ago

This is a most readable work by an accomplished author. It is particularly compelling because the writer has pitched his book towards a universal readership and not confined his outreach to an exclusively "american" sphere. Thank you for bringing it to my attention. I am not qualified to comment with any depth or confidence on the suspense genre but was sufficiently engaged by - Fear And Greed - and anticipate buying the book when it comes on the market. Best of luck. Tony Brady. SCENES FROM AN EXAMINED LIFE - Books 1,2 & 3.

MiltEsq wrote 712 days ago

Hi Milt,
I just enjoyed reading the first two chapters of "Fear and Greed." The pacing is good, and the description of the various locales is excellent, particularly when we get to Pennsylvania where you provide a rich account of the area's history. The character development is excellent as well, for example, Chief Henry with his personal history. You also provided through your main character's POV very lifelike use of the senses. Too many authors only describe what a character sees--in your story, Dave smells the dancer's hair ("intoxicated by the scene of her hair spilling in his face"), and he notes the smell of human activity in the former mining town, etc.
Dave says his ex-wife "go(es) down on my credit card" -- funny line.
Some suggestions:
I didn't buy the "I'm through" line in the prologue. Perhaps, "f'cking finally" or just "Finally" might work better/seem more natural?
In some places you use a hypnen where a long dash should be used. For example, in the prologue "work out a solution-" The long dash is longer than the hyphen and used for just such an occasion. This common punctuation gaffe appears several times.
"What about Mike Junior" should probably be end-punctuated with a question mark.
"What ever" should be one word the way you use it a few times.
Check point or check-point? You spell it two different ways. Also, check to see if it should be one word, with no hyphen.
"Over head" should probably be one word.
Just curious as to what year the Chapter 1 Pennsylvania scene is. If Vietnam vet Chief Henry is in his late forties that would make it around the the late 90s. Is that correct? Just checking.
Was Lorena Bobbit Italian? She was born in Ecuador. If your characters are just clowning around, this is fine. Just checking.
Very good job. Highly starred.
Dean Lombardo


Thanks for the great input!

Dean Lombardo wrote 716 days ago


Hi Milt,
I just enjoyed reading the first two chapters of "Fear and Greed." The pacing is good, and the description of the various locales is excellent, particularly when we get to Pennsylvania where you provide a rich account of the area's history. The character development is excellent as well, for example, Chief Henry with his personal history. You also provided through your main character's POV very lifelike use of the senses. Too many authors only describe what a character sees--in your story, Dave smells the dancer's hair ("intoxicated by the scene of her hair spilling in his face"), and he notes the smell of human activity in the former mining town, etc.
Dave says his ex-wife "go(es) down on my credit card" -- funny line.
Some suggestions:
I didn't buy the "I'm through" line in the prologue. Perhaps, "f'cking finally" or just "Finally" might work better/seem more natural?
In some places you use a hypnen where a long dash should be used. For example, in the prologue "work out a solution-" The long dash is longer than the hyphen and used for just such an occasion. This common punctuation gaffe appears several times.
"What about Mike Junior" should probably be end-punctuated with a question mark.
"What ever" should be one word the way you use it a few times.
Check point or check-point? You spell it two different ways. Also, check to see if it should be one word, with no hyphen.
"Over head" should probably be one word.
Just curious as to what year the Chapter 1 Pennsylvania scene is. If Vietnam vet Chief Henry is in his late forties that would make it around the the late 90s. Is that correct? Just checking.
Was Lorena Bobbit Italian? She was born in Ecuador. If your characters are just clowning around, this is fine. Just checking.
Very good job. Highly starred.
Dean Lombardo

MiltEsq wrote 716 days ago

Hi Milt,
Thanks for bringing your book to my attention. I have read through the first 7 chapters. You have a great writing style using very descriptive and realistic, believable dialogue amongst your characters. Each chapter intrigues me to read on for moire information regarding the plot. I love Pete and all of his spiritual insights. The side story of Amanda is fun as the reader wants Dave to get sweet revenge. I am waiting for the twist with Uncle Tony to reveal itself. A good suspenseful thriller and of course romantic as we feel a sweet relationship coming on with Lori as she awaits to be rescued by her night in shinning armor! And of course there is Dave(you've created to be quite human as we have all been down and out on our luck at times) who we are all rooting for! Very enjoyable read! If you have the time maybe you could look at my story "Agent H", Hope for Hadley, A true story of my daughter's autism. Its honest, educational, spiritual and down right funny at times. Good luck to you
Mary ann


Mary ann: Thanks for the positive feedback and for reading "Fear and Greed"! I will definitely read Agent H!
Thanks again!
Milt

hadley wrote 716 days ago

Hi Milt,
Thanks for bringing your book to my attention. I have read through the first 7 chapters. You have a great writing style using very descriptive and realistic, believable dialogue amongst your characters. Each chapter intrigues me to read on for moire information regarding the plot. I love Pete and all of his spiritual insights. The side story of Amanda is fun as the reader wants Dave to get sweet revenge. I am waiting for the twist with Uncle Tony to reveal itself. A good suspenseful thriller and of course romantic as we feel a sweet relationship coming on with Lori as she awaits to be rescued by her night in shinning armor! And of course there is Dave(you've created to be quite human as we have all been down and out on our luck at times) who we are all rooting for! Very enjoyable read! If you have the time maybe you could look at my story "Agent H", Hope for Hadley, A true story of my daughter's autism. Its honest, educational, spiritual and down right funny at times. Good luck to you
Mary ann

MiltEsq wrote 720 days ago

Only read the first chapter and thought it was amazing! Well done :)


I have now posted the complete manuscript. I hope you will read it and enjoy!

MiltEsq wrote 720 days ago

Your book shows great writing skill, in my opinion. I like flawed heroes like Dave and am especially impressed by your locale descriptions and dialog. five stars. backing.


I have now posted the complete manuscript. I hope you will read it and enjoy!

MiltEsq wrote 720 days ago

Your book title led me to check out your book. I started with your prologue, which is the only marked heading. That made reading confusing. You may want to mark all your chapters if its not just one long prologue


I have now posted the complete manuscript. I hope you will read it and enjoy!

MiltEsq wrote 721 days ago

Only read the first chapter and thought it was amazing! Well done :)



Thanks so much!

Dubois wrote 721 days ago

Only read the first chapter and thought it was amazing! Well done :)

MiltEsq wrote 721 days ago

Your book shows great writing skill, in my opinion. I like flawed heroes like Dave and am especially impressed by your locale descriptions and dialog. five stars. backing.


Thank you very much!!!

jack hudson wrote 721 days ago

Your book shows great writing skill, in my opinion. I like flawed heroes like Dave and am especially impressed by your locale descriptions and dialog. five stars. backing.

MiltEsq wrote 722 days ago

Hey, this is a damned good read....I loved it right from the start.
From a writer across the pond this was a change to read transaltantic dialogue which reminded me so much of the 'Michael Connelly' books I read to date 'in order'...
Great character development, brilliant interplay between the main players ..I love dialogue in between narrative....and this hit the mark spot on...
Highly rated / starred from this reader....well done
David



Thanks for the great feedback!!!

The Knowledge wrote 722 days ago

Hey, this is a damned good read....I loved it right from the start.
From a writer across the pond this was a change to read transaltantic dialogue which reminded me so much of the 'Michael Connelly' books I read to date 'in order'...
Great character development, brilliant interplay between the main players ..I love dialogue in between narrative....and this hit the mark spot on...
Highly rated / starred from this reader....well done
David

Cyrus Hood wrote 723 days ago

This story is actually better than the first paragraph. Personally, I feel you should re-write the first piece I did not think was written as well as the rest of the is chapter. for me, you sometimes use too many adjectives and can an old car really be venerable?
That said, this is a crisp, intelligent tale that grabs hold straight away. The dialogue is convincing and sounds authentic. I think this book will do well on authonomy and until I have read more I will give a fist full of stars and put you on my watch list. Good luck

regards

Cyrus

MiltEsq wrote 723 days ago

Your book title led me to check out your book. I started with your prologue, which is the only marked heading. That made reading confusing. You may want to mark all your chapters if its not just one long prologue


Thanks! I have been having trouble uploading the Prologue, but I apprecaite the tip!

patio wrote 723 days ago

Your book title led me to check out your book. I started with your prologue, which is the only marked heading. That made reading confusing. You may want to mark all your chapters if its not just one long prologue

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