Racers Legacy - The Racers Edge

Thanks for the comments, I was rushing to put the pitch up there and auto correct keeps editing ‘their’ to ‘there’ for some reason. Thanks for pointing that out.

there- over there / their - the sister belonging to them. You must get this right in your pitch :)

I read chapter one. I hope there's a twist to the story in chapter two and three. I'll read more later

But, chapter one. I was guessing and asking questions as I read. First, I thought the characters in the beginning live in a student house? Then I concluded no. Its unlikely student have fast car and time to race around. Its a bunch of strangers in a shared house? Then I concluded that was likely but then thought its unlikely everyone would into racing cars. I knew it wasn't a family house because there were characters without names.

I laughed when you introduced the search for the keys in the jacket pocket.. It was taking awhile so the person just grabbed the jacket and went. I can relate to that. Keys were focus points further on. I thought you were going to punch the story with something like, someone stole the keys then the cars.

You gave descriptions of a muscular character but you failed to make connection to the story. I thought a fight was going to happen. Or is that for chapter two and three?

This is nowhere near Too Fast Too Furious but the fact that you got me guessing, its intriguing and interesting. Therefore I gave it 5 stars

I'll add further comment when I read two and three. I hope its more explosive, like a car crash or someone die, or there a fight with the muscular man or someone stole the keys