The Beast of Macon Hollow

Only read 2 chapters so far but had to back it, its a very good read, i like the way you put the reader right into the story from the start.
Well done

Alison

Hi T C; Having just read your first two chapters, I would liken your writing style to one of my favourite authors, Ray Bradbury. The easy nature of your wording allows the story to roll forward without you even really noticing. The 'is it a nightmare or not' plays well at the end of the first chapter. I could easily see a child (or big kid like me) enjoying your story. Your main character, Will, helps with this as he is very engaging, as is the rural setting. I shall try to stop by again and read more, but in the meantime wish you well with your work.
RMA
The Snow Lily
Sea Spray and Stars

Bradbury...what a compliment! If only I had his depth of imagination... Thanks for reading. I hope you come back in the future and read it in its entirety.

Hi T C; Having just read your first two chapters, I would liken your writing style to one of my favourite authors, Ray Bradbury. The easy nature of your wording allows the story to roll forward without you even really noticing. The 'is it a nightmare or not' plays well at the end of the first chapter. I could easily see a child (or big kid like me) enjoying your story. Your main character, Will, helps with this as he is very engaging, as is the rural setting. I shall try to stop by again and read more, but in the meantime wish you well with your work.
RMA
The Snow Lily
Sea Spray and Stars

Excellent writing. I was hooked from the first sentence! There were very few errors that I could find, so engulfed in the narrative as I was. Everything from the dialogue to the character development to the scenery was believable, authentic, engaging. highly starred and watchlisted!!

Hi Troy,
A while back we spoke about a read swap, and I'm sorry it has taken me so long to check out The Beast of Macon Hollow. I've read Chapter 1 and it is a very good start. You write tense scenes well, the setting eerie, the characters convincing and the southern dialogue/dialect is darned good. I'd just run smack into a spider before reading this so the part involving the black widows had me slapping at my skin. Just one nit-pick is there should be a long dash or colon between "sun" and "goats" vs. a hyphen. Highly starred, and if I see anyone looking for good scare I'll point them toward "The Beast."
Dean Lombardo
"Space Games"

Thanks, Tod. I appreciate the kind words and catching the typo. Boy, I hate typos...I miss them though they're right under my nose. It really does take another pair of eyes. BTW, I'll check out The Last Wink.
T.C.

Wow, this is really excellent! Your writing is truly masterful -- great descriptions, dialog that rings true, voices that are distinct, and of course great action!
Not much to critique here. I did find a typo (in chapter 1 "did people began" where you meant "did people begin".)
It's really super as is, but if I was to tinker at all, I'd consider substituting some dialog for "telling" in the first section, where you say the talked in hushed whispers. Seems like an easy place to show them doing so, rather than telling us they did so. But that's just an option, hardly worth bringing up. Excellent stuff!
Tod
And if you have any interest in kids' literature, please take a look at my novel at
http://authonomy.com/books/40646/the-lost-wink

Wow, this is really excellent! Your writing is truly masterful -- great descriptions, dialog that rings true, voices that are distinct, and of course great action!
Not much to critique here. I did find a typo (in chapter 1 "did people began" where you meant "did people begin".)
It's really super as is, but if I was to tinker at all, I'd consider substituting some dialog for "telling" in the first section, where you say the talked in hushed whispers. Seems like an easy place to show them doing so, rather than telling us they did so. But that's just an option, hardly worth bringing up. Excellent stuff!
Tod
And if you have any interest in kids' literature, please take a look at my novel at
http://authonomy.com/books/40646/the-lost-wink

You set a great atmosphere and build your story layer by layer so that it really pulls the reader in.
The dialogue between Duck and Rufus is very good.

The idea of a Beast really appeals as I lived close to Bodmin Moor as a child and teenager which apparently has its very own beast!

You write very well and your style is engaging.

You have a very good story here and with your ability to tell the story in such a clear and atmospheric way I think you may well be on to a winner.

Starring it highly and wishing you the very best with it.

Debbie
Speedy McCready

Thanks so much, Ophelia! I'm glad you liked it. Please read the rest when you have a chance. I feel it only gets better, especially once you get past the set-up.

Excellent writing. I was hooked from the first sentence! There were very few errors that I could find, so engulfed in the narrative as I was. Everything from the dialogue to the character development to the scenery was believable, authentic, engaging. highly starred and watchlisted!!

Bradbury...what a compliment! If only I had his depth of imagination... Thanks for reading. I hope you come back in the future and read it in its entirety.

Hi T C; Having just read your first two chapters, I would liken your writing style to one of my favourite authors, Ray Bradbury. The easy nature of your wording allows the story to roll forward without you even really noticing. The 'is it a nightmare or not' plays well at the end of the first chapter. I could easily see a child (or big kid like me) enjoying your story. Your main character, Will, helps with this as he is very engaging, as is the rural setting. I shall try to stop by again and read more, but in the meantime wish you well with your work.
RMA
The Snow Lily
Sea Spray and Stars

Thanks for the kind words, Alison!

Only read 2 chapters so far but had to back it, its a very good read, i like the way you put the reader right into the story from the start.
Well done

Alison

Excellent writing. I was hooked from the first sentence! There were very few errors that I could find, so engulfed in the narrative as I was. Everything from the dialogue to the character development to the scenery was believable, authentic, engaging. highly starred and watchlisted!!

Hi T C; Having just read your first two chapters, I would liken your writing style to one of my favourite authors, Ray Bradbury. The easy nature of your wording allows the story to roll forward without you even really noticing. The 'is it a nightmare or not' plays well at the end of the first chapter. I could easily see a child (or big kid like me) enjoying your story. Your main character, Will, helps with this as he is very engaging, as is the rural setting. I shall try to stop by again and read more, but in the meantime wish you well with your work.
RMA
The Snow Lily
Sea Spray and Stars

Only read 2 chapters so far but had to back it, its a very good read, i like the way you put the reader right into the story from the start.
Well done

Alison