[I] Froxxe's Plummet

This is a nice start. The writing is good. I think, however, that you should work on your pitch a little more to explain about your story. Your story seemed choppy, I think because of the use of too many modifiers and the attempt to make it vague (or poetic?) Instead, it makes it hard to follow. I read through Chapter Two, which is very long. I think you should make it into more chapters. I also think that you need more details in movements and sounds.

Kisora

There is some wonderful prose in this. Your description of the boy's 'birth' from the ocean is written in a way that gives it a dream-like quality. You keep the pace nice and slow here which is very effective.

There is a backdrop of mystery - where has he come from? Who is he? Where is he?

I liked the description of Noir - she smelled of 'magic and spices and fire'

The pace picks up when they reach the city. Then the boy finds himself locked in a room 'Something wasn't right'
Like this cliffhanger here. Adds some tension to the story.

This has the makings of a very good fantasy story. There are times when the writing jars a little . But these didn't spoil the read for me and can be ironed out as you edit.

HIgh stars and wishing all the very best
Debbie
'Speedy McCready'

Dear Kisora: This is a very ethereal, imaginative, inventive fantasy full of lyrical imagery and poetic characters.

All of your character names and places sound like they come of antiquity and the heros of yore: Noir, Rairyn, Andeon, Carrith, Criexdrian, Dragon, Froxaleus, the Elder god of the 2nd Tier, septarius, the spine of Chaos, Oniah, Aeternum, Auraxis, and, of course, Froxxe, the boy from the sea.

You write beautiful imagery and I was captivated by such lines as:

"The world was a wash of sounds, the soft crash and kiss of the tides on something softer; something even more delicate was all that composed the realms of reality."

I only have two small suggestions:

1. that you provide a glossary with all the names of your characters and places and give a brief (no more than one or two sentences) description of each.
2. it might be a good idea to have an editor read your manuscript and help you edit out some grammatical awkwardness in some of your sentences before you finish polishing your story.

You have such a gift at writing imagery! You use words much like a poet to paint scenes as clear as a watercolor or an oil painting. Your writing has tremendous potential and you show yourself to be a real artist in this (your first?) manuscript. Best wishes for your writing career and eventual publication!

Hi Kisora; Back as promised to read book one, of which I am three chapters in. Stolen Memories read very much as a prologue and certainly held my interest. But then came Ascendance, a quiet beautifully written piece. The forming of the boy who would become Froxxe, with the descriptions of the tide and sea was quite wonderful. The text does require a little cleaning up and there is the odd bit of grammar to correct but the main writing itself is fantastic. This continued through to chapter three and the appearance of Noir, who as I said in my review of book two is a stand out character to me. She has a little of everything, attitude, grace and style. I am very impressed by your work so far and could easily see this transfered to something like an Anime as well as a book.
Well done and high stars.
RMA
The Snow Lily

This will be a short review, sorry. I have limited time at the moment due to an impending dinner.
I felt as if this story was very well written. Fantasy is one of my favourite genres and I felt drawn to your book due to the 'feel' of it and it being the kind of thing I imagine in my head - if that makes any sense.

A few pieces of 'concrit'.

unlikeliestof (typo in summary) - I think you mean 'unlikeliest of'

Also I found the font a little jarring due to its size and the random Chinese/Japanese symbols were slightly confusing.