Anima Mea

Hi Lucy,
Well I haven't commented on a book on Authonomy in months. Need less to say I'm glad I popped back in to read this one. I have no negatives, couldn't find a thing, not that I expected to!!!
Beautifully written. Perfect descriptions captured the pain of death and the unbelievability of finding yourself in the after life. I love the idea that Maxine and Robert are tied as soul mates. I can't wait to see how it all pans out, and will definitely read it when its available. Now I get what the title means too, which I was kind of curious about. Very clever, indeed!!!
Excellent job.
Cheers Jacoba
I will bookshelf it, as I havent updated mine in months.

Wow, that is one intriguing first chapter! It grabbed me and sucked me in, wondering what the heck was going on, and keeping it up all the way through. You've done an awesome job with this on all levels. Six stars!
Critique-wise, all I found to pass on were very minor errata, easily fixed:
"disorientated" I think should be "disoriented"
Half alseep (asleep)
It's just (insert: a) little trick I know
And that's all I found. Best of luck with this!
Tod
http://authonomy.com/books/40646/the-lost-wink/

Lucy, When you come back tot he site, I hope you read this...So delicately written with excellent planning and preperation. I am sure you will have your reasons, but not to come on here and push this for all it deserves seems a tragedy to me. A nice flow to this book but the narration is perfect for me. I would normally run a mile if I came across this, but as I am looking for books that fall outside the more military genre I go for, I suppose I looked for this. So well done. I loved it and am now converted. I hope it does well for you.
Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R) Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you?? Many thanks. Sean

Anima Mea.
By Lucy Pepperdine


I thought to myself...Oh no!... Not another dream when I started to read the story.
After all it was interesting as Maxine fights against drowning, but that’s not the case here.
She’s been suffering from a mental problem on awaking from sleep for some time, so it all ties in nicely.
The only thing is, this time she won’t come out of it in the usual way, she’s in the after-life being cared for by her Granny Mo who died a while back.
You capture well the anxiety of Maxine as she tries to unravel what has happened. She still thinks that it’s just one of those bad moments upon waking...she’s wrong this time of course.
I found the story to be very romantic as well in parts and should suit the ladies.
The tender loving relationship between Robert and Maxine is highlighted in the second chapter.
Beautifully written with deep emotion as Robert gives permission to turn off the life support machine.
To me this is writing at its best, excellent description, very good dialogue and a scene that the reader can’t help but feel part of.
As I read on, the evidence of the author’s ability is only too apparent.
A truly inspirational book, penned with a high degree of skill and thought.
Top stars and will shelve very shortly!

Neville. The Secrets of the Forest (Series) – The Time Zone.
The Secrets of the Forest (Series) – Cosmos 501.
One Off, Sir!

At first glance the plot might seem overworked and unoriginal but the writing salvages the book which is very different from most such stories. The MC is nicely portrayed and the effects of the husband's loss nicely described in good quality narrative prose. I like this book because despite the way it starts (it's been done before), the story unfolds fluently and the characters shine. it's a very pleasant read in fact.
Recommended as a diversion at any time.
Read it - you'll see.
Bought a copy myself!

Hi Lucy,
I have just read the six chapters you have posted. I love the way you start with the coming up for air and the layers of dream-state that confuse Maxine. The way you keep the pace moving forward with short chapters and alternating POV also work well. I will be interested to see how the plot unfolds and the story moves on.

I tend to keep my comments to plot and structure (we all have spell-checkers!) and so have nothing to add other than great start!

Regards, Kit Fox

I've just read all the chapters you have uploaded here. The afterlife idea is good but I think the real strength is your description of Robert;s grief. It made me cry. I'll look in on Amazon.

I love the concept behind this story. One of my favorite genres - ghost stories. And this one is even better because it shows that true love goes beyond death. Very good. I do think that some editing is needed (but you may have already published) because it is too wordy. You take a long time to tell about a scene and event. One criticism - Maxine yells she can't breath, you can't yell if you can't breath.

You write well. Your writing is very interesting and engaging and made me want to know more. I did skip over some paragraphs where it was taking too long to get there, but it is such a good idea I wanted to read more. You write about Robert and Maxine's love well, I can tell how much they love each other.

Good job.

Abby

Very good. I've read the first two chapters and if I wasn't so tired I would certainly carry on. I'll come back at some point and read the rest.
Best of Luck
Sue

Wow, that is one intriguing first chapter! It grabbed me and sucked me in, wondering what the heck was going on, and keeping it up all the way through. You've done an awesome job with this on all levels. Six stars!
Critique-wise, all I found to pass on were very minor errata, easily fixed:
"disorientated" I think should be "disoriented"
Half alseep (asleep)
It's just (insert: a) little trick I know
And that's all I found. Best of luck with this!
Tod
http://authonomy.com/books/40646/the-lost-wink/

Hi i wondered if you would like to swap books.

yours looks a good read.

Wish you luck

kate off the rails

Here for our read swap

I really like this. I have read 3 chapters and want to read more when I have time.
I like that both chapters one and two, open firstly with Maxine emerging from a dream and then Robert waking from a long sleep. You convey their relationship well without making it 'soppy'.
In chapter one you increase the anxiety Maxine's feels as she struggles to comprehend where she is. She can't quite believe that the old woman at her side really is her Granny Mo.
Chapter two is aboiut Robert and his reaction to Maxine's death. You handle this very well getting his emotions across to the reader.
In chapter three I like the way you use the senses - Maxine sees brightly0coloured flowers and fish, smells the heady perfume of stocks and the tea her grandmother gives her.

An excellent start. Well-written and engaging with a good pace.

High stars and wishing you all the best.
Debbie
'Speedy McCready'

Hi Lucy,
Well I haven't commented on a book on Authonomy in months. Need less to say I'm glad I popped back in to read this one. I have no negatives, couldn't find a thing, not that I expected to!!!
Beautifully written. Perfect descriptions captured the pain of death and the unbelievability of finding yourself in the after life. I love the idea that Maxine and Robert are tied as soul mates. I can't wait to see how it all pans out, and will definitely read it when its available. Now I get what the title means too, which I was kind of curious about. Very clever, indeed!!!
Excellent job.
Cheers Jacoba
I will bookshelf it, as I havent updated mine in months.

Hi Lucy; I have just read your first two chapters.
I have read a few life after death type stories but this adds a new twist and I think it excellent. The first chapter reads well. After perusing your pitches I guessed Maxine dead, but the way you bring this to a head is very well done. Granny Mo adds to the surreal nature of the chapter as does Maxine's very real reactions to what she believes to be happening. I liked the last line which made me stop for breath and think about what I had just read.
Chapter two, and Robert's portion of the tale is also very well done. A completely different side to the same story. The news at the hospital and Robert's reactions are exactly what you would expect and again well observed. You show a nice tender touch with the whole turning off of the ventilator.
If there was anything I could point out to help it would be that the end of the chapter with Robert's brother could possibly be the start of a new chapter, rather than extension of the second. Just to let the death of Maxine properly sink in, (just a thought.) Either way though works.
Overall this is very good. I want to read more, which is the main thing and I shall do so.
High Stars
RMA
The Snow Lily