Book Jacket

 

rank 5917
word count 30783
date submitted 14.08.2012
date updated 02.09.2012
genres: Fiction, Historical Fiction, Young ...
classification: universal
incomplete

Nancie

Angela Rigley

A ten-year old girl is forced into service in Victorian England after the death of her father

 

After the death of her father, ten-year old Nancie Knight has to leave the charcoal burner's hut, the only home she has ever known. She starts work at The Manor as a scullery maid and is forced to work long hours. She hears strange noises in the night. What can be causing them? And will she ever see her mother or baby brother again?

 
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tags

, engaging, hard work, historical, nancie, service, suspense, victorian england, young girl

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4 comments

 

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Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 529 days ago

Angela,
You have an ear for the spoken word, your dialogue superb, forming the backbone of your tale. The descriptives in your narrative put me right there in the moment, followng Nancie around, seeing the boils on her young neck as she experienced a moment of freedom in the open meadow away from the confines of her little home where her father lay dead. This commentary of Victorian England has the makings of a must-read. Thank you so much for sharing.

Kenneth Edward Lim
The North Korean

angie rigley wrote 601 days ago

Hi Jennifer, thanks for your kind words. I have looked up 'fitted' and 'fit' and it looks as if you can use either word.

Wow, I really liked this! I planned to read just the first chapter and see how it was but I ended up reading everything you have posted. Try as I might, I couldn't find much of anything to fix. But I did find a couple of possible grammar issues. They are small, I admit, but I was hard pressed to find very much! So here goes:

1) "she that it would give her a hump back" I think you are missing the word 'said' "she said that it would give her a hump back"

2) "her old ones fitted" fit?

Well, that was all I could find!

- Jennifer James
* A Place For Hope

Jennie6092 wrote 602 days ago

Wow, I really liked this! I planned to read just the first chapter and see how it was but I ended up reading everything you have posted. Try as I might, I couldn't find much of anything to fix. But I did find a couple of possible grammar issues. They are small, I admit, but I was hard pressed to find very much! So here goes:

1) "she that it would give her a hump back" I think you are missing the word 'said' "she said that it would give her a hump back"

2) "her old ones fitted" fit?

Well, that was all I could find!

- Jennifer James
* A Place For Hope

KMac23 wrote 608 days ago

Hi Angie, You have another really good story here with 'Nanci'. I'm amazed. I wish I could read more, and really would love a copy if you are published. I love Charlotte Bronte's, 'Jane Eyre', and this book really reminds me of it, in style and in the emotional feeling I get from it, along with the Victorian setting. And yet the plot is unique. Your character, Nanci, is precious, a little girl, trying to figure things out, yet proud and not wanting anyone to think she doesn't know what she's doing, so keeps trying and getting it wrong. She seems a very relatable character, as most of us have felt the same. I think you take the time to develop all your characters, as I get a good sense of each of them very quickly. I do hope you upload more of this. I can't think of any help I can give you with this story, as it seems terrific the way it is. Six stars and future backing when I can. Kara

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