NO TIME TO WEEP

Hi Merle - wow, this is good stuff! It's so sad - even more so to know it was real - but your style has ensured it isn't in any way something that feels sorry for itself. It's very matter-of-fact but in a good way. It engages you all the more and draws you in. So often writers (myself included) try to find the balance between brevity (to ensure good pace) and detail (to ensure good imagery). Rarely, you have managed to find that fine line and I get a lot of descriptive detail (right down to the subtle inferences in the doctor's voice) without having to plod through paragraphs of boring detail. Great stuff and def. going on my shelf! W

Hi Merle,

Firstly I have to applaud you for having the courage to write an autobiographical book, you have been very brave!

Secondly, i have read the first two chapters and i can find nothing to fault! You write so naturally that the writing flows easily. The dialogue is realistic. The narrative emotive, and the characterisation flawless.

I feel i cannot go on becasue i am a wimp and will struggle to handle the traumatic issues in this book, but i wish you all the best with it and i am sure it will appeal to a large audience! It is deseving of backing so i am shelving it.

All the best,
Valentina x

Hi Merle
You have a fascinating story and a great deal of courage to write it. You also have impressive ability as a writer. The writing is emotive, descriptive and easy to read. It's a personal view only, so take it or leave it, but I felt the beginning was rather slow and it might have been better to start the story at a more dramatic or emotive point, or to get into the ''meat'' of the story sooner. I would have liked to find a strong hook early on.
I suspect this has been written primarily as therapy, and I can certainly relate to that as writing The Pencil Case was a healing exercise, but I think you have the makings of a great narrative non-fiction book here with a little attention to structure and flow. You certainly have the necesary writing ability. I really enjoyed reading about life in South Africa, and I've made a note to watch your progress with this.
Good luck.
RaineyC
The Pencil Case

Hi Merle,

Your story is compelling and needs to be heard. I suspect that writing was more therapeutic for you than any kind of therapy out there. I know putting my own story down on paper helped me a great deal. And it was free too!

One suggestion, take note of your dialogue. In Chapter 2, you have a line that should not be in quotation marks. "She's going to tell me it's psychosomatic," I thought. No need for quotes since it's introspection.
You are not alone; we all have our crosses to bear when it comes to editing. I've got my own to contend with. It's just part of the menial little tasks of writing. More importantly, you have a solid foundation for a story which needs to be told. The rest are just details.

Wishing you all the best with your book and in life as well.

Backed,
Janine
MY KIND OF CRAZY

No Time to Weep hits all the right buttons for me, having spent a fair amount of time in South Africa both pre and post -apartheid. Your story is a dramatic and frequently harrowing one that tugs the heart strings and captures my imagination as well as my admiration. It seems to me that this has already been carefully edited and is well written, so I have nothing to offer you by way of suggestions for improvement - this is fine as it is and has my backing.

No time to weep
How the death of a loved one can sweep us up and never really let us go. It is like an invisible cancer. To share your story so openly is a brave thing. But I think though it many will realize their pain has a place and they don't have to suffer alone. All the best to you. On my shelf C.P

Merle,
Wow, what a fantastic memoir and so well writen. Thanks for sharing your pain and suffering. Touched me personally, because after 60 perfectly normal years depression knocked me for a loop last year. Can cause all kinds of strange symptoms like extremely high blood pressure, but the oddest one was: I couldn't sing. Turned out it was all in my head and thanks to antidepressant drugs, I am recovering. Keep your chin up and keep writing. It has been the best therapy for me.
Steve Ward
Test Pilot's Daughter: Revenge

I think this is excellent writing, and as I love reality and am interested in psychology and illnesses I found this account not only interesting also moving. Backed with pleasure.
BADD

I love the raw and vivid truth of this. Thanks for sharing with the world!
J
Children of Paradise

I really wanna read this but I can only comment on the pitches as for some bizarre reason this weekend we are unable to read any book on the website. The short pitch worked for me. The longer pitch needs to be tightened. This is a non-fiction book so the SELL should be easier than on a fiction book. Check out my pitches as how to SELL this story to the casual reader.

Sometimes you only have one shot to grab that person's attention. For now I will SHELVE and come back around when I am indeed able to read what you have posted. If you get the chance, would like your comments on my book, but only if you want to. No worries if you can't. Cheers!

JC
The Obergemau File

Blimey, this is hard-hitting stuff! And very very well handled! I don't think you can say you love a book like this but I certainly admire it a great deal and am happy to lend my support! Backed
Simon (BLACK SHADOWS)

Had another look..his is better than ever......shelved again!.......................bst of luck to you.

strong opening, confident style and brave telling of personal tragedy

you have a sure touch in dealing with topics which are potentially divisive or controversial . i sense this is because you write to bring such things out in the open, where everyone can see them, rather than staying silent about them . this i wholeheartedly approve and support .


your prose has an enviable sense of rhythm, and you maintain a strong forward momentum, detail is revealed in well-balanced proportion, not overly sentimental – the reader will willingly accompany you on this journey because you tell your story so well


i am backing this and wish you well with it

freddie
("honour")

Hi all sincere apologies for not getting back to all of you who've been in touch. I have been otherwise occupied away from authonomy. But I'm back and will be getting back to you all asap. : )

MERLE,

You have a touching and insightful story here that touched my heart and stirred my mind. Written beautifully, you gave a resonating account and talked of a regrettable era of South African history whose legacy is still haunting the people today.With all due respect, this book is rightly shelved.

All the best.

Janvier (Flash of the Sun)

Merle, I must admit that I didn't expect to enjoy this one, but having read your first 4 chapters, I've certainly changed my mind.

Your writing flows so smoothly, and although there are scenes that you could have drowned in self-pity, I didn't see any of that. I'm so glad you decided to write this.

Shelved, of course.

Cheers,
Sheryl (comment on mine? Backing optional)

Thanks Merle for sharing your hard and interesting life.

I didn´t realize the first chapters were a flash forward,
or the next ones a flash back..I liked it..

Maybe you could make the sections blend a bit easier.
If you´re revising one thing you could easily do is
put in the occasional direct speech,
especially at the start of a chapter and something
typical of the person or that sums it all up.

Chapter seven needs breaking up into short paras etc.

Congratulatuions on youir wonderful effort! What a triumph!
Best of luck with it.....................Mikey

You have a powerful book here. Your story and the way you write it is very telling. Keep up the good work!
Tammy

chapter one: great start to the book, the overlapping voices/memories that overwhelm her in the doctor's waiting room are especially effective. The end of the chapter seems a little haphazard - the story loses its inner tension and doesn't draw the reader onto the next chapter. However, chapter two has a fantastic last paragraph that really draws the reader in. You have a nice, natural style and a good way of letting dialogue tell the tale in parts :-)

Merle:

I read your chapters, you are an exceptional story teller and a good writer. I have put you on my bookshelf.

Best,

Bill
being Normal

Dear Merle,

This is a courageous, powerful book. And you deliver it with splendid writing. I think I can relate, at least somewhat, to the intense turmoil you describe in South Africa: I grew up in Birmingham, Alabama during the latter stages of the civil rights movement and still remember the last vestiges of segregation there. (Thank God there has been real change in Birmingham and other places like it.) And later, I had a chance through my job to cover a trip Nelson Mandela made to the MLK Jr. center in Atlanta.

I don't mean, however, to say I can relate fully to your story. I never had to personally go through what you and your family experienced. It dawns on me that you don't come across here as bitter, but rather you paint a straightforward, realistic picture. Again, "courage" keeps coming to my mind when I think of your work here.

It's an easy decision to back this book and I hope you find a publisher soon.
Best,
Mark

Good God Merle, I love you and have no care what so ever what color you are. Thank you so much for writiing this and doing such a good job on it. Like my book you're not writing it to make people feel sorry for you. Our stories must be told so that things that we've lived through will be washed from the face of the earth forever. Thank you again for writing this and good luck. I'm afraid that a non-fiction has about as much of a chance here as a snowball in hell, but we must strive to make it, you and I. I now feel about you as I do my own sisters for what they went through Kennesaw

Emotionally and culturally. Continue in the same pace, in the same tone. It is beautiful. The shake the tin song part I can almost hear the clucking of her tongue as she sang. The fireplace the culture and the naming of children. The details made me think of African culture and brought me home. I can sense your accent in the writing. This may end up being a book many may relate to and shows how human emotions transcend cultures. Keep it up.

Hi Merle: This is a book that touches my heart. Many of us reach a time in life when we have to come to grips with what has gone before in order to become who we really are. The best way to do that is by sharing but it takes real courage because to reveal ourselves makes one feel so vulnerable, and we all like to appear self-assured, displaying confidence. I admire you. By sharing you support others who need to know they are not alone. This book is on my shelf.

Hi Merle

This is brave, moving and utterly lacking in self-pity. You've got a compelling story to tell and you deliver. If there is a fault, it is that the prose is a little bare. It may be that this was your intention - sometimes a stark, matter-of-fact narrative serves to make the message stand out even more. But it does come across more as a re-telling than a literary work. I also found some of the dialogue a little stilted. But this is work that definitely merits a shelving.

Mark

I've made room on my shelf. You're backed.

Good luck.

Joanna

Dear Merle,

Please let me start by saying that I love the title...seems to mirror what you say about yourself in your bio too...none of us should have "time to weep" life's too short! Secondly, let me tell you that my husband is also from SA now living abroad and I can feel your story and how very important this work is to you...much more than a novel...I get it.

That being said, I want to tell you how I think you could make your story even more powerful than it already is...because it is a story that needs to be told and heard by others and it is obviously hard to edit your own work and even more difficult when the story is yourself. So...I think you miss a few grand opportunities to show what this character is thinking instead of telling us. At one point you blatantly tell us that she "told the doctor that counseling wouldn't benefit me..." is there a way to play that out in dialogue? Is there a way she can roll her eyes or something that would tell us how she felt about what he said?

And the other point I have is that at times you could add punch to your writing simply by being more brief...as a depressed personality is. For example: "I was uncomfortable but I complied." Why not: "Uncomfortable, I complied."

These are obviously just my thoughts but I so want this to be successful. Please take it in the spirit it is offered...happy to shelve.

Johanna
Scream Out Loud

Hello Merle,

This is excellent. Well written, smooth transitions and a compelling plot. I know it's true, but it reads like a novel which is good. Your pitch is excellent and full of trauma, but no self-pity. I think this must be a great achivement becuse it is true and it happened to you.

Only one suggestion - get an original cover to make your book stand out from the crowd. Lots of book on authonomy have the same cover and it makes them melt into the background.

This will go on my shelf as soon as I get room. On my watch list till then.

Joanna

This is such a moving, fascinating and absorbing memoir. I was compelled to read on...and on. I could see this as one of those memoirs that is quietly published and then grows and grows on it's own through word of mouth, in a 'Three Cups of Tea' sort of way (which I read and then recommended to absolutely everyone I know!). I choose my autobiographies carefully, but I'd definitely buy this one.

On an editorial note, I wonder if you would consider revising your synopsis, which may put people off as it gives the impression of a much more depressing book than has so far been posted. Perhaps bill it as a memoir, then people won't be surprised when you use the first person in such a personal way. Then perhaps less detail and keep it more general to the mood of the book. Let the reader make their own discoveries as they go along.
Also I wonder if as a prologue it would be nice to tell some funny childhood incident before you go into the awfulness of the depression and doctors' surgeries in England, just so the reader gets a feel of what delights are to come?
The only other thing I noticed was some very minor text level editing that would tighten it up a little in places - your writing is very good, don't get me wrong, it would be small things like in chapter one you have the word 'shelved' repeated quite a few times, so perhaps that could be varied. That sort of thing anyway.
I hope that helps.
Good luck with it, and good luck yourself.
Best wishes
Eva

thank you dearly drew. i am not the type to have people feel sorry for me though sometimes i feel sorry for myself and at these times i get my bum off the couch and do something about it. i do hope that this comes through when people read. i have been through a lot in my adult life but time is too short to be bitter about anything and i feel that being positive is sooo much better. thank you too for shelving my book it means a great deal

hug hut : )merle

When I started out I thought that this would be a slice of pure 'misery-lit' and my heart hardened (don't ask for sympathy from those who received none themselves), since I'm not a fan of the genre. I'm pleased to report that having pressed on, it became obvious that this is not what you have set out to achieve. This is well-written, thought provoking and engaging, for those reasons I'm shelving you.

Drew X
BiteMARKS

I also wrote a true life story and while the story is laid out before you it is tricky to make in entertaining for persons other than yourself. You suceeded.
Jeannette (Broken Birds) Shelved

You call your book, No time to weep. I am sitting at work stealing a moment to read your first two chapters and I just about have to control myself from not making a fool of myself by sobbing out loudly. The end of chapter 2 has definitely intrigued me. I'll be going back as soon as I can steal another moment.

You call your book, No time to weep. I am sitting at work stealing a moment to read your first two chapters and I just about have to control myself from not making a fool of myself by sobbing out loudly. The end of chapter 2 has definitely intrigued me. I'll be going back as soon as I can steal another moment.

The writing is dry, direct, and to the point and I like it because it seems more real. Most of the time authors change the story and the language to add more drama, and recreate the moments, but this not all about recreating the moments for the audience. It's about getting the thoughts on to the page before they cause a mental breakdown. After being strong for so long, and burying feelings of hurt, the emotion is gone. I am speaking from experience when I say depression takes away all feelings and this is an honest portrayal.

When I first read the tag for the book I thought this was the story of Sandra Laing, a living white girl born black during apartheid. I realized it wasn't when I began reading. This isn't really a comment, just thoughts that were going through my head.

It could be that my finance is in South Africa right now and I miss her terribly, but this story is ringing true to me. I look forward to reading more when, not if, it becomes published.
Later days,
Kenny

This is an extremely important book. It’s one I personally would like to spend more time reading. There’s nothing clichéd about it. Reading through the list of vocative sentences at the beginning, each listing a different tragedy – although arguably there are too many for the term ‘tragedy’ to properly apply: at what degree of frequency does the tragic become commonplace? – I got a real sense of the narrator’s state of mind, and why even her grunting to her husband when she gets of bed in the morning can be construed as an act of generosity. It’s a wonder she gets out of bed at all. She’s a hell of a stronger woman than I am a man.

Personally speaking, and you’re probably going to consider this odd until I explain, I found the following sentence very moving: “A mixture of horror and deep compassion flooded the doctor’s face. For the first time I saw and felt that he really cared and that I was not just a number on the patient list he had to get through.”

Why did I like that so much? Well, so often in these sorts of books, the doctor is seen as clinical and overly detached. Assuming this is a true story, the fact that Mrs Stanley has retained enough of her humanity, after all she’s been through, to recognise the humanity of someone who cares for her, and can recognise the genuineness of that care through the institutional cloak, fills me with awe.

So yes, this is a wonderful book. Truly wonderful. Bookshelved.

Bren Verrill
The Weird Problem of Good.

Hi Merle - wow, this is good stuff! It's so sad - even more so to know it was real - but your style has ensured it isn't in any way something that feels sorry for itself. It's very matter-of-fact but in a good way. It engages you all the more and draws you in. So often writers (myself included) try to find the balance between brevity (to ensure good pace) and detail (to ensure good imagery). Rarely, you have managed to find that fine line and I get a lot of descriptive detail (right down to the subtle inferences in the doctor's voice) without having to plod through paragraphs of boring detail. Great stuff and def. going on my shelf! W

A really solid opening paragraph, especially the first sentence. Direct and to the point and it leaves the reader wondering. It's a touching piece that generates feelings of sorrow in the reader. Quite fascinating and I'm interested to see where things go next.

Hi Merle - wow, this is good stuff! It's so sad - even more so to know it was real - but your style has ensured it isn't in any way something that feels sorry for itself. It's very matter-of-fact but in a good way. It engages you all the more and draws you in. So often writers (myself included) try to find the balance between brevity (to ensure good pace) and detail (to ensure good imagery). Rarely, you have managed to find that fine line and I get a lot of descriptive detail (right down to the subtle inferences in the doctor's voice) without having to plod through paragraphs of boring detail. Great stuff and def. going on my shelf! W

Hi Merle,
I have just read upto chapter two and it looked interesting. I narrowly find my way into the first dialogue of chapter one. The dialogue is nice but I wonder what kind of a doctor would feed a patient with those depressive information. The pitch is nice too. Will continue.

Just read the first chapter. love it and well written. Also, I have good news for you...publishers usually publish autobiographies faster than fiction etc. good luck. I'm backing this one. I wish I had time to read more.

Read another two chapters. just great.

Hey merle,
just read everything and I love it! You paint a beautiful picture of your childhood in South Africa and for the first time on Authonomy I found myself wanting to read more.
Im not sure why the text is repeated and bold all of a sudden; probably when you where editing it, if you made it all like your first two pages- double spaced, not bold and obviously delete the repeated section, then it would be nicer to read. But the way you write really drew me in.
Speaking as someone who was told to write about my experiences by my counsellor I have to say - GO FOR IT! It took me 2hrs a day for a year (when my boy had a nap!).and 120,000 words later its like a weight is off my shoulders, I even revisited the places i had fought last November; something unthinkable ten years ago.

Dont stop writing Merle! The most powerful and important writing is from the heart.
simon
(paint)

-shelved by the way!!

Hi, Merle,
I just read the first 6 chapters of your autobiography. I think you have a fascinating story to tell and I found myself wanting to know how your brother Theo suffered such a terrible death. However, major problems started to appear in Ch. 3. You don't provide the necessary background info. about the racial politics of South Africa, or your own ethnicity, so it's hard to figure out just where you and your parents fit in. You answer those questiions in Ch.4, but you then go on to repeat much of what's in Ch. 3. Were you aware of that? Finally, there are all kinds of errors in Chs. 4-6 which really don't do justice to the harrowing and interesting story you have to tell. I hope this helps--not to discourage you, but perhaps to provide some indication of how to shape the prose to fully represent how greatly you, and your family, have suffered.
Best,
Denise

Hi Merle, I have read all six chapter and especially enjoyed the first two. Very interesting and well written. Did you know that in chapter 4 the chunk of text from chapter three that starts - The very first day my father ..... is repeated until the end - They were family.
So far it sounds like your early childhood was very happy, we haven't got to where things turns bad yet.
Will you be posting more chapters?
I would be very interested to read on.
Shelved.
All the best, Agneta

Hello Merle, thank you for inviting me to read this deeply touching story. I really like the way you talk about yourself in the "now" and then, in the next chapter you really start the story, going back in time and drawing the reader in. And I do love the comparison of people with flowers, that is lovely! If I may make a suggestion, on chapter 4 it would be easier to read if you put a few more paragraphs in and cut out the repetition of the beginning at the end of the chapter, it had me confused for a moment, but it does not hurt your style or your story.
I think that one must be very strong and brave to write about his/her own life and doubt that I could ever do it. You managed this difficult task beautifully! It is easy to read and before you know it you've read three chapters and are looking for more. I think it is great work!
I have it on my watchlist for now, but as soon as I can make room it will be on the shelf (feel free to remind me in a couple of days!)
B.

Merle,

Your story is both fascinating and heartbreaking. You do a wonderful job of sharing your life with us. I wishyou much success.

Darcia

It does not matter if a book you are reading is not your normal book or taste. And this is the case here for me. but this does not mean that one cannot make a judge ment. Because if the auther can write realy well the quality is still there. one thing that did irritate me big time. not your writing but the last two chapters are printed out in script I found made my eyes go funny.. but the fact is you write realy well, and I think this is worth a backing. So as is said (there you have it) well done.

Hi there Merle,
I have placed your book on my shelf ;-)
I was engrossed, it's a really good read. I take my hat off to you for writing something like this and sharing it.
At times it felt as if I wasn't actually reading, does that make sense? As I say, I was really drawn in. Your writing seems effortless, it's thought provoking and full of emotion. I can't fault this and am more than happy to have it on my shelf, well done you. I hope this gets the recognition it deserves ;-)
Bests,
AnnabelleP
(Adelaide Short)

Hi Merle,
What an absolutely wonderful book! The first chapter could actually have been written about myself. Your language is so good and you write in a very engaging way. I just love it!
Good luck!
Nillan
Blue-eyed in Luhya-land

Hi Merle,
What an absolutely wonderful book! The first chapter could actually have been written about myself. Your language is so good and you write in a very engaging way. I just love it!
Good luck!
Nillan
Blue-eyed in Luhya-land

Hi Merle,

Firstly I have to applaud you for having the courage to write an autobiographical book, you have been very brave!

Secondly, i have read the first two chapters and i can find nothing to fault! You write so naturally that the writing flows easily. The dialogue is realistic. The narrative emotive, and the characterisation flawless.

I feel i cannot go on becasue i am a wimp and will struggle to handle the traumatic issues in this book, but i wish you all the best with it and i am sure it will appeal to a large audience! It is deseving of backing so i am shelving it.

All the best,
Valentina x

I would imagine that there is at least some autobioggraphical material in here; in which case I salute your bravery. So far, you tell a gripping story well; starting it off with the heroine's breakdown - a good start point. Maybe some editing would help, but others on this site will possibly help you more with this. Anyway, welcome to authonomy; good luck with this; and we will put your book on our shelf for a while