The common thread running through nearly all critiques of Fair-eyes has been that much of the language is too sophisticated for the age of my target audience. I have therefore just completed an exercise (not yet posted) of going through trying to imagine how a 10 year old might percieve it and simplifying the language where necessary and possible. I'm still not quite there yet though. On the way through I noted down any words I wasn't quite sure about. With further revisions I've managed to whittle it down from 97 to just 33 "dubious words". Now I think I need some help.

I should be very grateful if anyone has the time to consider the following list of words and let me know which they think are likely to be understood by the average 10 year old. In the case of those you don't consider appropriate, any alternative words or phrases to convey the same concept would be welcomed.

Agility, Apprehension, Begrudgingly, Biped, Composure, Currency, Economy, Enclave, Gravitas, Humiliation, Inanimate, Incompetence, Inverse, The Latter, Megalomaniac, Metaphor, Metaphysical, Misgivings, Mystique, Ornate, Philosophical, Photon, Pièce de résistance, Precariously, Predicament, Provisions, Reconnaissance, Remorse, Sceptical/Scepticism, Subtlety, Subversive, Tangible, Unprecedented.




Posted: 28/11/2008 13:02:06

I'll look again at this later Keith if you remind me- not much time now, but basically it all depends on context. What can the child work out from the syntax of the sentence and the context it's in, and any illustrations, and whether you've got lots in one chapter. Many of these words are pretty challenging. It's great to broaden vocab - and I encourage my pupils to reach for the dictionary regularly, but unfortunately vocabs are shrinking, and I was amazed to find that my 7-9 year olds had trouble with eerie.

Tricia.

Posted: 28/11/2008 13:06:18
Last Edit: 28/11/2008 13:06:37 by P J

I think it depends on the density with which these words occur. I'm thinking that all could be made to work in the right context and with appropriate amount of padding or explanatory text. I don't think you can assume that, taken by themselves, a 10yo would know the meaning of most of these words, especially the abstract ones like tangible and subversive. If you are going to use a word like this, I feel you'll need to provide context so they can figure out what it means. On the other hand, a number of these words strike me as very abstract and not particularly suitable for chatty kids fiction, regardless of whether the kids would know what they mean. I feel that possibly a sentence would be less cluttered without them, even in adult fiction.

Posted: 28/11/2008 13:13:50

BTW - I think 'too sophisticated' is not quite the feeling I had. I feel that kids would feel distanced and alienated from texts in which too many of those words appeared too close together. There is nothing wrong with educating kids, but it needs to be done at a speed at which they want to be educated. I'm guessing that a strong wad of this sort of vocabulary is simply over their heads, and they feel bored. Put your book in one level above they language they are using themselves. Of course we don't want to talk down to kids, but we've got to give them the time and opportunity to understand, and not push them too much.

Posted: 28/11/2008 13:21:52

Hi Keith,
i think its more about the context than the words themselves- if they are presented in a way which makes their meaning clear, children will enjoy reading them and working out their meaning.
The other thing you could so is the 'five finger test'. - used a great deal as an informal test of readability. Take any page and put a finger on wach word that a child of the age for whom you are writing might not know. If you get to five, the text is too hard for the child.

It would be much worse to over-SIMplify- couldn't resist a tiny plug, as children have the most astute condescension meters inthe world.

Posted: 28/11/2008 13:39:42

If nobody tells you the language is too sophisticated, then you're writing down to them ~ and the kids. ;o)

People these days really do treat kids like ~ well, kids. All kids lit should be tested on kids, simple as that, adults know nothing.



Posted: 28/11/2008 16:47:32

Hello Keith -
I asked my son - an avowed non-reader, sadly, but he may provide a counterpoint to Stef's daughter - about your list, and managed to get him to read by putting the words on a screen and asking him to put in definitions. I didn't provide any context, and he came up with the following:

Agility, yes movement
Composure, yes to keep your cool
Currency, yes types of money
Economy, yes to do with money
Humiliation, yes make people look bad
Inverse, opposite
Metaphor, yes comparison
Pièce de résistance, yes signature piece

(I was staggered by the last one). he also said that agility is to do with balance.

Posted: 29/11/2008 10:21:00

I'll look again at this later Keith if you remind me- not much time now, but basically it all depends on context. What can the child work out from the syntax of the sentence and the context it's in, and any illustrations, and whether you've got lots in one chapter. Many of these words are pretty challenging. It's great to broaden vocab - and I encourage my pupils to reach for the dictionary regularly, but unfortunately vocabs are shrinking, and I was amazed to find that my 7-9 year olds had trouble with eerie.

Tricia.

Stef and Martin, thanks for your "straw poll" results which will help me to decide which might need changing and which not.
Martin, you didn't mention how old your subject was but I'm assuming in the 10 year ball park, give or take a bit.

Posted: 01/12/2008 12:39:09

The common thread running through nearly all critiques of Fair-eyes has been that much of the language is too sophisticated for the age of my target audience. I have therefore just completed an exercise (not yet posted) of going through trying to imagine how a 10 year old might percieve it and simplifying the language where necessary and possible. I'm still not quite there yet though. On the way through I noted down any words I wasn't quite sure about. With further revisions I've managed to whittle it down from 97 to just 33 "dubious words". Now I think I need some help.

I should be very grateful if anyone has the time to consider the following list of words and let me know which they think are likely to be understood by the average 10 year old. In the case of those you don't consider appropriate, any alternative words or phrases to convey the same concept would be welcomed.

Agility, Apprehension, Begrudgingly, Biped, Composure, Currency, Economy, Enclave, Gravitas, Humiliation, Inanimate, Incompetence, Inverse, The Latter, Megalomaniac, Metaphor, Metaphysical, Misgivings, Mystique, Ornate, Philosophical, Photon, Pièce de résistance, Precariously, Predicament, Provisions, Reconnaissance, Remorse, Sceptical/Scepticism, Subtlety, Subversive, Tangible, Unprecedented.