CarolinaAl's messages

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vanderlove wrote 19 days ago   

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International Monetary Fund

J.Adams wrote 20 days ago   

Hi Ho, Al! How are you doing? Well, I hope!

I'm looking for some help if you have some free time. I'm finally at a point where I'm not sure what to do with my rewritten first three chapters of Existence, and feel I need some help. I just posted them --

HC (and others, including you, I believe!) suggested losing a lot of my narrative and exposition and moving some of it into dialogue/action, which I've tried to do. But the back story I had in chapters one and two won't work in dialogue with anyone in those chapters. That information might fit into dialogue when Alex is in the psych hospital, but she doesn't really become involved in hospital life until chapter five. I'm concerned that without that back story, my MC might not be particularly interesting or readers may not really care about her enough to keep reading.

If you have any time to have a look, or have any friends on Authonomy who might have a look, I'd really like some eyes other than my own on this. I can't tell if the rewrite is any good or if it's boring, or if it assumes the reader knows more than I've actually given them. It's surprisingly complicated to do a rewrite! It's not at all like running through and editing here and there!

Anyway, just if you have time. I hope all is well and spring is on its way.... (Pouring rain here for the past two days, our back yard is a swamp, but at least the wind's died down - don't need any uprooted trees!)

Thanks for any help, if you have time!


Sandra Hamer wrote 47 days ago   

Thank you so much for your comments.

lauran999 wrote 49 days ago   

Pls, My sincere apology if this correspondence don't meet your personal ethics, I am contacting you cos someone I presumed to be your relative or incidentally share the same surname with you who was an investor with our bank but died on Tuesday August 16, 2005 in a plane crash in Venezuela has come to the limelight in our bank because since 2005 that he died his portfolio and investment worth Millions Pounds has not touch because no name next-of-kin was found in his bio-data form. Please reach me below for more details.
Jonathan TRAORE

Barry S wrote 56 days ago   

New Online Crime/Thriller Magazine Launch
Coming Soon...

All you authors out there get noticed...We are now open to short story submissions max 10,000 word count, send as e.mail attachments-
Also, self-published authors can advertise their
book along with their front cover and blurb free of charge. Just send details.

Mob: 07814780856

Barry S wrote 56 days ago   

New Online Crime/Thriller Magazine Launch
Coming Soon...

All you authors out there get noticed...We are now open to short story submissions max 10,000 word count, send as e.mail attachments-
Also, self-published authors can advertise their
book along with their front cover and blurb free of charge. Just send details.

Mob: 07814780856

Tim Waters wrote 73 days ago   

Carolina, three years ago I submitted my book "The Water Works of Clear Wash City" to authonomy and every person who read it loved it. Since then I've completely re-written it and, in my opinion, improved it beyond all recognition. If you’re still using the authonomy website then please have another look for me - I think you'll be quite surprised at what you find. If you like it can you back it again for me again? You can also see more of my book at its website – thanks Tim Waters

ittybitty wrote 78 days ago   

I am so sorry, I just got this. I have not been on here in so long and have finally started to come back. I will definitely look into "Savannah Passion" and review when I can. It may take a while as I am about to have a baby and will be a tad out of commission. :)

Take care!

J.Adams wrote 167 days ago   

Hi Al,
What's up with you? What's going on with the Savannah series? I hope things are well in your world!
I wanted to let you know I moved Savannah Oak off my shelf (into my WL) for a few days and will have it back up on the shelf asap, but I needed the space for return obligations plus two in the top ten that I'm trying to keep on the shelf through to the ED.
When you have a chance, please do let me know how you and yours are doing. I wish you all the very best!

Anthony Brady wrote 167 days ago   

CarolinaAl - Greetings

I am pushing forward to the Editor's Choice and am calling on all the authors, who I have supported/commented on in my long Authonomy progress to give me their Backing support. Can I rely on you. Best Regards. Tony Brady.

Karen Eisenbrey wrote 194 days ago   


Some time back, you read and commented on an earlier version of my wizard fantasy, Crane's Way. I have just uploaded a drastic revision of the whole book, which I hope succeeds in picking up the pace of the opening. I invite you to revisit a chapter or two and let me know what you think.


Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 211 days ago   

Thank you so much for your past comments. They've helped
me with my long journey thus far. Would you consider a final 10-day backing of "The North Korean," if you think it worthy, that is?

Much obliged,

Software wrote 220 days ago   

Hello Al,

Hope you are well. Doghouse Blues currently at 2. Happy to reciprocate with a swap read.

Looking forward to reading your comments on the Doghouse Blues webpage.

All the best,


J.Adams wrote 234 days ago   

Hi Al,
I hope life is treating you well! I wanted to let you

John J. Lawrence wrote 247 days ago   

Hello Alan,

This note is a mutual read, critique and ‘back each other’s book’ request.

To decide if my manuscript meets your high standards for placement on your bookshelf, please examine a short exert:

If high adventure on the open sea peaks your interest, then peruse chapter 21 to experience a storm at sea in the climatic part of this young adult adventure story.

For a short humorous read, you might try chapter 20, pages 10 -15 or perhaps chapter 9, pages 6 – 8 will tickle your funny bone.

If you are in the mood for drama, then listen in as the old grizzled adult gives sage advice to a troubled teenager in chapter 18, pages 8 – 12.

Determine if my style of editorial critique meets your expectations by examining my critiques done for these manuscripts:

“Arrival of the Ageless” by Michael Mautla
“The North Korean” by Kenneth E. Lim
“Blood on the Banana Leaf” by Charlotte Stirling

Please contact me if you agree to mutual honest critiques of three chapters and placing our manuscripts on each others watch list and bookshelf for at least a week.

My manuscript is “Uncharted Waters”. You are welcome to read any chapters that you choose, but if possible please review chapters one, eight and eleven. Let me know which three chapters of "Savannah Oak" you would like for me to review.

A manuscript only gets one shot at the Editor’s Desk.
Let us help each other make it a winning shot!

Best regards,

J. J. Lawrence
“Uncharted Waters”

rummy346 wrote 255 days ago   

Hi Al,
I wanted to let you know I've moved your book off my shelf temporarily (it's in my watch list) to support nearly all of the top five this month, (usually there are only one or two in the top five that I've read and enjoyed and want to support during this last slog, but there are four out of five this month). I'll put Savannah Oak back up in September.

J.Adams wrote 268 days ago   

Hey, Al,
How's life going? What's happening with the Savannah series? I have a friend who needs to read all of them when you've got them published. (More than one friend, actually, but I'm out visiting friends in Olympia, WA, and I am looking at her shelves and I think your books need to be here (as well as on my own!)
I hope you and yours are well and the summer is treating you gently!
Wishing you all the best,

Kenneth Edward Lim wrote 279 days ago   

I'm taking a poll on those who've read "The North Korean." I've moved my action-packed first chapter (where the Kempeitai officer commits hara-kiri) to the climax part at the end of the book. The first chapter now opens to an idyllic scene of the protagonist walking around the farm with his father. Would you rather I put back the action-packed chapter at the front of the book to grab bookstore-browsers' interest? YES OR NO.

Thank you so much for clearing up this dilemma.

Breno wrote 304 days ago   

Hello there!

I see you are an Authonomy user and a book lover, just like me.

Well, everyone likes new tools and ways of dealing with books, so I want to present you Widbook!

See this page for more infos about the "Youtube of books!".

Let's keep in touch, ok?


jack hudson wrote 311 days ago   

Alan: My wife Pat and I write mystery thrillers set in New Mexico. Please take a look at our Warm-Up Kills. swap reads? jack hudson