Hello ,

Hope you are well. Maybe you would like to try out my new satire, Doghouse Blues. Here is an endorsement:

I was attracted to Doghouse Blues from the pitch alone because it was so very different. There are so many budding writers out there who want to earn the same sort of money as J K Rowling by writing exactly the same kind of book and , to be frank, I am getting a bit tired of it.
This, on the other hand, struck me as being an original piece of work. The product of a lively mind and written by someone who is an excellent observer of the real world out there and who knows how to translate his observations into print. Just the right amount of dialogue, which carries the story along well.
I have not read the complete book (yet) but have dipped into it fairly freely to see if the momentum is maintained. It certainly is.
Philip John

Looking forward to reading your comments on the Doghouse Blues webpage.

All the best,

Clive

(jessica_2vndaye@yahoo.com)
My name is jessica i saw your profile today at (authonomy.com) and became intrested in you,i will also like to know you the more,and i want you to send a mail to my email address so i can give you my picture for you to know whom l am.Here is my email address (jessica_2vndaye@yahoo.com) i believe we can move from here.I am waiting for your mail to my email address above. jessica.(Remeber the distance or colour does not matter but love matters alot in life)
Please rpely me with my email address here

( jessica_2vndaye@yahoo.com)

Hey, sorry if I've told you the one about the Lunatic before - check it out if I haven't, but there's a Romance going on too now!

:/

I’m very sorry if I’ve previously messaged you, but I’ve had one of those glitches that wipes out backers and watchlists. I lost nearly 60 backers and over 100 watchlists and can’t find most of my old backers as they backed me over 2 months ago and the RSS feeds don’t go back that far..

If I was on your watchlist or if you backed me before I would greatly appreciate your support again for - The Lunatic Sings - or if you’d take a look at it if it’s new to you.


THE LUNATIC SINGS

- "like a William S. Burroughs novel with a point"

- "Deftly imitating waves of consciousness"

- "the reader glides through … It’s like dancing in someone’s mind"

- "You should be a playwright as this should be spoken"

- "like a meditation" – "A breathtaking concept"

- "… glorious driving rhythms of the syntax. It's prose that has an inner music that almost compels us to speak it aloud. "

- "Out of the mouth of this one comes reflections of both humanity and sanity."


If you’ve considered Lunatic before I’ve put up a very different book recently too, a Romance, so rather than spam you for a read for that in the future, and maybe as an antidote if I’ve messaged you before for Lunatic, you might like to take a look at ‘The Book of Esther’.


THE BOOK OF ESTHER

- “I found this mesmerizing”

- “I love the way your words allow us to connect with your emotions, the way they compel us to reminisce about our own experiences, and the way they capture both happiness and sadness so perfectly.”

- “I can tell you already that I love it. …the lover and the beloved. Your story reminds me of how beautiful and yet painful both of those roles can be.”


Thank you,

John

Hi Gollum,

Want a fast-paced, highly original, hilarious romp?

If Carl Hiaasen and The Office had a baby, it might look something like ANIMAL CRACKER.

Can a bunch of smart, sassy women get the goods on their boss at Boston’s venerable Animal Protection Agency? Hal Mason is Brad-Pitt handsome, with a Harvard professor wife and an adorable but shiftless son who wins the heart of Diane Salvi, the organization’s new communications director and the book’s narrator.

The malapropping, narcissistic Hal, famous for his animal-themed ties and jokes, has managed to earn the adulation of the organization’s board of directors and the scorn of his staff. When his negligence leads to the dogshit literally hitting the fan, Diane and her reporter roommate Genie set out to dig up some dirt on him, with a little help from friends in the office.

There's never a bad time for a fun read in which the good guys (or gals) wreak vengeance on a conniving boss who deserves no less.

I'm steadily moving up in the rankings, and could use some help. And I do swap reads.

Thanks for considering Animal Cracker.

Best,
Andi
P.S. I notice you have some room on your shelf. I'm moving up in the rankings, and a backing from you would really help just now.

Hello, please check out Sentence or Finish by me Sand.
If not for you then please take a look at Gobbeldygook by my friend Morgan. We thank you.

Hi, thanks for backing and for the advice, always appreciated. I'm at work now until Sunday so won't be online too much. (My farm is really gunna suffer). I'll have a look at your stuff Sunday and try and offer you something construction then.

Best wishes,

Claire. :-)

Hello Gollumfryingegs!

See what I did there? Inserted your name into a standard spam message to make it seem personal, cunning eh? I realise from all the messages I receive that you are unlikely to read this! I’m not going to bore you with lots of information about my work; this is just a shout out to say “Notice me!!!” If it results in you looking over my work and having a chuckle then great. I always try and return the comments I receive.

Thanks for reading.

Claire. (A Reason to Stay)

PS, I too have an obsession with cows...

Hello Gollumfryingegs

For over four millennia the Great Pyramid of Giza has guarded a secret image. It’s not a regular Egyptian hieroglyph. So why is it there?

You no doubt receive many requests to consider a book, so please forgive me if I’ve placed additional burden on your message board. I joined Authonomy about six weeks ago and added my book "The Pyramid Legacy". In that short space of time it has now entered the top 30. Here is a small selection of the positive comments it has already received:

“This book has style! It's fast-paced and exciting as well as throwing up intriguing mysteries and ideas. I really really enjoyed it!”

“The only thing that would make it better is if it were sitting on my bookshelf at home.”

“Magic holiday read”

“It's all there with great characterization, dialogue, impeccable detail and setting. I am absolutely eager to read it all.”

"What a great and captivating read! I'm into the von Daniken theories anyway, but this is a book that is unique and fresh."

If you have a few moments to check out the book it would be much appreciated. Many thanks.

Clive Eaton
The Pyramid Legacy

Hi, I was hoping that I could entice you to take a quick look at my book, Snowflake. I guarantee a return read (for you and/or any book of your choice) within 24 hours.
Thank you and best of luck,
Ana

Hi there,

I’m trying to reach the Ed in April as I have an important deadline to meet by May. This is my last chance to make my dream come true, so I would really appreciate it if you could put me on your shelf, even if its only for a couple of minutes. A second backing will count, even if you have backed me before.

I will be watching my newsfeed for your reply/backing so I can immediately thank you for your support/reciprocate (you get the most points from me, because of my high TSR). Even if you dislike YA fantasy/sci-fi - I have found that most people enjoy my writing…

Many thanks, Sana

Hello. They say there are hundrerds to read my book. And then they say it is terrible. I don't understand them.

They say they are the ones of the hundreds who would buy this book. Then they say it is awkward. I just don't understand them.

Would you be the one in a million to help and find the mystery? Or not, you would happily join them and create one more mystery for me? Let’s see!

I happily reciprocate the favour.

Gollumfryingegs,

May I entice you to a read of The Twelfth House (and perhaps to comment)?
It is an adventure thriller steeped in politics, religion and conspiracy theories, set between ancient times and the present day.

All the best
Bojan (The Twelfth House)

There are three animal stories in BADD. I am sure you would like one of them.
I usually ask for a chapter read swap.
David Seaby

A useful tip for some - you can back any number of books and when you take one down to make space, that book loses no points. FAQs does not make this clear.

Hello Dear,
Hoping you are fine and living good,My Name is Mrs Mary Duki when I saw your profile I decided to contact you after I’ve gone through it. Your profiles sound interesting and lovely.I've something very important which I would love to share with you privately, therefore, would advise you to kindly write me back on: (Maryd55@hotmail.fr) so that I'll give you details. Waiting anxiously for your anticipated corporation,
Yours,
Mrs. Mary Duki : (Maryd55@hotmail.fr)