Dear David, There are reflections of Dorothy Dunnett in your writing, but crossed with the densely informative and philosophic prose of a 19th century scholar - or earlier - who is thoroughly familiar with every detail of his chosen topic. For a student this is a treasure chest, and if you do finally find time to prepare the notes you plan, researchers may well be lining up to use them. Make sure you publish them and don't give them out free. My fear is that it may be difficult to find a publisher willing to take the risk with a work of rare erudition at a time when the public, by and large, is seeking fast, easily digested adventure. Birlinn might take it, or even Canongate, but you may have to consider self-publication in the first instance and hope that the minority searching for a challenging read (like me) will give you enough sales to cause the big publishing houses to change their minds. - Then publish the notes! As a Scot I had no problem with the Scots dialect even although it is not my version of it, but I suspect many readers would be daunted by the archaic level and sheer quantity of it. It may be necessary to tone it down a bit, and again Dorothy Dunnett may be a good guide on how far you can risk going. Nevertheless this is a great read for anybody reading about this period and about the traumas of high and low in Renaissance Scotland. Many Scots know quite a bit about it, hazily, but very few indeed in the depth you offer. Having read 6 chapters already, I judge this as a triumph, and I shall certainly return to read the rest at my leisure. Congratulations on a great achievement. I have starred highly. Margaret Woodward : Kilbaddy

A sensitive, keenly observed historical. Emotionally charged. Tense undercurrents. A dramatic story, elegantly told. Confident writing. Finely-honed plot. Exquisite writing. An engaging read. Backed.

Hi David A lot of work must have gone into this novel. The dialogue, pitch and descriptive words kept me coming back for more. I have not finished reading the first chapter, yet. I was wondering if you would be interested in a swap read? The sun and Thee Saber, by Craig Ellis. Thanks in advance. Craig

Hi David A lot of work must have gone into this novel. The dialogue, oitch and descriptive words kept me coming back for more. I have not finished reading the first chapter, yet. I was wondering if you would be interested in a swap read? The sun and Thee Saber, by Craig Ellis. Thanks in advance. Craig

You capture the essence of historical Scotland extremely well and I do like your attention to minute detail. I really like your choice of L -H as the first person narrative voice. It reasonates with authenticity. Your storyline is most interesting and your descriptive writing makes your work a pleasure to read. Backed. Andrew Burans The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Scottish historical fiction, what a gem! Though I am biased! Alison Butler

Furore. Converting research into fiction blends entertainment and instruction, a social and educational service you have succeeded in, through a well crafted story narrated in a strong voice. Backed. Azam Gill “Blasphemy!”

I find this book and your research quite fascinating, David. I have many dissenters in both my maternal and paternal ancestry lines including those Huguenot's on my father's side who fled to England in the late 1600s. My mother's father was a minister in the Scottish Baptist church and others on my father's side were Congregationalists. This will not be an easy read but definitely a engaging one. P.S. Thank you for backing my "Huguenots". Betty K "Destiny's Weave"

Hi David, the standard of research on this is fantastic! I'm putting it onto my watchlist for a fuller read. Chris Miles

Fascinating. Your dedicated research shines through. I would like to see one thing sharpened, and that is that our engaging protagonist does more participating in the events unfolding before him. We all have reactions and emotions and feelings, whether they be fear, satisfaction, worry about the future and where various events are leading us, willing or unwilling. What do you think? Backed.

Engaging historical fiction is hard to come by. So often the reader is bogged down in the historical details that the underlying plot becomes secondary, but not in this case. I was engaged and thrilled at the level of subtle detail. Even more so, this is educational as well as entertaining: eral brain-food, and that's a delight to find. Backed with pleasure, Abi xxx

This seems a fine read, though I think it is something that will make demands of its readers. My only adverse comment is that I found the introductory parts too long. Possibly this says more about me than about the book. Colet

Hooked by the pitch and carried effortlessly along, loved it. E.Loraine Royal Blood Chronicles book one

David, I don't know what John Knox did for his country, but if I read "Furore" I bet I'll find out. Damn, what a labor of love! And well written. I mean really well written. Scholarly, like Robert Graves, entertaining, like Michener. I can only wish you all the best, and someday hope to see it published in hardback, with many family trees, old maps, a glossary, annotated, with color illustrations, right up there with "Name of the Rose". SC (Viene La Tormenta)

Furore David Nicol This is quite convincing. I like your storyline and the writing style. Some very lucid arguments or observations in the writing I must say - "the skill of head-counting belongs to the shepherds, so we may infer that scholars are worthy to be counted as sheep. And we know Folly's best friend is self-love, an attribute that lends itself most keenly to men of ambition." I love your prose. For that alone, I would buy this book - each line, each paragraph is delicious. I look foward to reading more of L-H's story in due course. Happy to back this and hope you find a publisher for this. Zan

Thanks for this. Hope others are not put off. [QUOTE] Interesting, but in pitch I don't know what John Knox did for his country. I almost didn't read it because of this. A zoomer Going Out In Style [ENDQUOTE]

Interesting, but in pitch I don't know what John Knox did for his country. I almost didn't read it because of this. A zoomer Going Out In Style

David - I'm impressed, not only with the quality of the writing, which is superb, but also with the sheer amount of work that must have gone into researching Furore. Understand, I don't usually read historical fiction, but once I've whittled the down the stack of books on my watch list, plan toreturn and finish all of your uploaded chapters. In the meantime, I'm happy to back Furore. And I invite you to have a look at my book. Best of luck here. And thanks. -Jeff Lee THE LADIES TEMPERANCE CLUB'S FAREWELL TOUR

David, I didn't think people wrote books like this anymore. I admire your ambition in taking on this tale. You have a rich narrative bordering on a thickness in keeping with the scottish accent you present. It is perhap not the most accessible of books and won't be to everyone's taste. It is slow and heavy but I can see a lot of depth to keep interested readers turning the pages. For me the first chapter of background was a bit of a distraction, I would prefer to get on with the story but I appreciate that it has it's place in setting the scene. all the best with this, I will back it as my contribution to your success. good luck on this merry adventure stephen

Firstly, I was drawn to start reading Furore because my father is from Scottish descent and I live in Edinburgh - Scotland has always fascinated me and now that I live here, it definitely feels like home.. there aren't enough books written in the vein of Furore, not that I know of, and it is an absolutely fascinating - and very well penned, read. I wish you the best of luck with your novel.. Backed with pleasure

Hi David. I’ve read through the first chapter of your manuscript, and I like the historic picture you weave. The writing is intelligent and what I would expect to hear from a Renaissance point of view. While I see this as a strength, it might also be a weakness in that it could limit your audience. But, the writer must be true to himself. I’m happy to back this. Please consider looking at my manuscript, “The Job: Based on a True Story (I mean, this is bound to have happened somewhere)” – I hope you’ll find it something fresh and different in the religion genre. I’d certainly appreciate your support, but only if you think it has merit. Thanks, Craig Davis http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=19440

The joy of historical fiction is not only do you usually read a good story but you learn so much too. So it is with Furore. Whilst I found the introduction and first chapter a trifle daunting, once I'd perserved the story took off for me. It's no light read but is a book that should not be rushed. Your writing adds elegance to the narrative and your meticulous research shines through. You offer me a glimpse of a period in Scottish history which is fresh, intriguing and most worthy of shelving. Margaret.

I liked this book. I know nothing about Scottish history so reading this was a revelation. It's good the way you tell it from your narrator's standpoint. Makes us feel we're really in ancient Scotland and this is really happening right in front of our eyes. It's a good read. I’m adding this to my shelf. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

Very evocative, brilliantly researched and a great voice. I was drawn in by the pitch and the subject matter, it was one of my grandfathers favourite topics, if only he was still alive I could really impress him with all I've learned from Furore.

This is a wonderful piece of work. Rich in description and setting, it emerses the reader into renaissance Scotland and Patrick's world. The first person nattation works very well for the sole reason that you have mastered the voice for the era. Your writing is elegant and Patrick's story is engaging. Congratulations. Backed. Richard Bard BRAINRUSH (2010 ABNA Quarter-Finalist)

You have a great style for historical fiction but, you also have a tendency to tell the reader more than he needs to know for the sake of the story. Excising all but the most telling details would help you to cut this down to a manageable size. Tim Chambers Moonbeam Highway

Furore Your style really adds to the richness of this. You get a real sense of structure and research in this. At first I though the first person narrative would spoil this however it is one of only a few book I think it actually enhances. There is a lot of knowledge and depth to this book. – Good luck

You have chosen to write in the first person. The chances of an ingenue being published if they chose the 1st person is very low. Editors for major houses dismiss these effortsout-of-hand. I am told by agents that this is because the POV is narrow. I was not aware of this when I wrote Kuda Puti. I have since changed to the omipresent narrator and I find that it has more acceptance. I liked your style and the narrative has depth and the feel is that of an earlier time. I have backed it and look forward to my comments above being proven wrong.

The rich setting is reminiscent of James Mitchell's writing with a panoramic view of the protagonist's childhood settings. It's clarity is enhanced by the natural flow of the words. Their choice sets the tone of this historical piece and lulls the reader for a luxurious read. Given this book is most likely written for those that prefer literary works, it seems to hit its target audience. Perhaps one thing to consider is changing the word count. IMHO, 150,000+ words sounds like an encyclopedia. ALthough that count is distributed between three books, consider putting the appropriate number of words for this book in the pitch, then market the remainder of the series. It is apparent that your writing skills are strong. With that in mind, I'd like to offer one suggestions. Although the setting is all-encompassing, is it completely necessary? For instance, are the pipes important? If so, consider revealing their placement by weaving it into the story at a time when the protagonist can use it to his advantage. If this information is only valuable to establish the scene, condense it or sprinkle it in small doses throughout the text. Establish the protagonist's challenge as soon as possible to hook the reader. Why isn't this book on more shelves? ~ Toby

Dear David, You must have put so much reaerch into this. There is such a lot of detail about monastry life and also the religous philosophy and politics at the time. For anyone interested in history, religion and/or Scotland, it is a winner. ( I am interested in all 3). I think perhaps your story only really takes off after the first chapter. It's interesting stuff in Chapter !, but possibly as a first chapter it's too hard going and could put people off. When you start to write about the boy's life in the monastry and how he differed from the village boys etc, that's when it hooked me. It's only a suggestion of course, but would it be possible to start with that? I enjoyed the piece about the ball games and how he became unpopular because of his insistence on good grammar! The descriptions on the tutor were good too and full of humour. I liked the way the narrator states he spoke in Latin all lhe time and consequently, no one understood a word he said. So they had that problem in those days too! It felt very real. You've got a great deal of facts and insight on a little known subject and it could be the reader is approaching it for the first time. I wonder if sometimes your paragraphs are a bit too long? If you shortened them it might make it less overwhelming ! But I enjoyed your book. Yes, it was a heavy read ...but it was worth it and somebody on the look out a book like this, expects and probably demands, a heavy read. More for your money's worth! Just another thing. I told my daughter (the student at St Andrews) and she says they have a Patrick Hamiliton Day at the university...so he is not forgotten! I will back your book when I rearrange my bookshelf...probably tomorrow. Cherry G.

Dear David, Literary & historical fiction is really a work art. Thank you. :) I can't imagine all of the time it took to bring it all together. May God help you to finish it. My only suggestion would be to cut the longer paragraphs in two for an easier faster read. You have created my interest by having detail that makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. Since I have already backed & commented on your book, I am making this "comment" & putting your book on my watchlist to help it advance more. :) PLEASE take a moment to BACK/COMMENT on my TWO Books, ... "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not" ... and the UNEDITED version? ... "Tell Me True Love Stories" Thanks, Susie :)

I've been to Scotland and since I am a historical nutcase this appealed to me. I like stuff I can learn from and you have taught us well. Slight niggle: that short pitch can be redone as: The first martyr of the Scottish Protestant Reformation: this is Patrick Hamilton's story. SHELVED! I can use your comments on my book when you get the chance. Cheers! JC The Obergemau Key Authonomy's #1 rated commentator

This is a wonderful, dramatic, turbulent novel. So full of scholarship and writing talent. I've learned from both, I hope. Backed. Lynn

Hi David, I'm afraid I have been owing you some feedback for some time - apologies for the delay. First of all there is some very effective writing here - sentences which are pithy and jumped off the page at me - eg - 'That which is commonly called nobility is naught but a windy thing of human devising.' / 'Soon I will go up the hill.' / 'Eventually it arrives in the brewery and some say that it fulfils its true destiny at last.' / 'For both of us learning became a substitute for honest vocation.' Occasionally though there is descritpion that is in my opinion rather OTT - eg - 'truly becomes worthy of exaltation' (seems a bit much in relation to beer.) I spotted the odd inconsistency in spelling in archaicisms - 'weel / weal' - I know in real trexts of the time this would be normal, but I'd be wary of replicating that here. There are alos places were it feels repetitive - eg - the para re cloisters / south-facing etc. - cloister is used 4 times - the final sentence adds nothing to what has already been said and if the third use of cloister was replaced by something like 'place' I think it would be easier to read. The main problem I had here though was that I felt a lot of the early chs (I read 3) are too long and involved and give far too much detail when I'd like to get on with the story - eg the lengthy description of the layout of the monastery - a few key details, neccessary to the story would be enough for me - as it was I started skimming - not what you want. Ditto in the bit about the relations between the religious houses (sister / uncle etc) which I'm assuming is supposed to be humorous - sorry, but for me it went on far too long. One reference and then the clip round the ear would have been about right imo. I felt this was a problem right from the introduction, and in a bookshop I would have stopped reading at that point, because there wasn't enough story to get me through the effort required to assimilate all the info I was being given. For example how much of the background to Alexander Cunningham / Glencairn etc is essential to your story? If it frustrates me, for whom the Cunningham family are of particular interest I strongly suspect others will find it more so. I'm sorry to sound so negative, but I'm commentating here because I feel that there is some great writing in here that would emerge much more clearly if you pruned substantially. BUT this is only my opinion and needs to be weighed against the reactions of others and I give it here because the constructive criticism that I received, particularly when I first uploaded helped me to have a much improved and tighter version of my novel. I hope my commetns are of some use to you. Good luck with this, Margaret (PS - If (and its a big if) I get a publisher book 2 or 3 of this series will end up in the Plantation of Down in Ulster and will focus on James Hamilton (son of a preacher in Ayr) who became Viscount Clandeboye.)

Dear David i learnt from your story and I back it with pleasure. shah

Dear David, Thanks for your enlightenment. Hope you'll read my Memoir, He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not & also the unedited version, Tell Me True Love Stories of He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not. Thanks, Susie :)

This has the feel of an authentic historical novel with strong prose and excellent characters. BACKED! Best wishes, Barry (Little Krisna and the Bihar Boys)

David, I found your writing style to be easy to follow along, bringing in elements of human interest, like chess games and athletics in the courtyard. Interesting philosophy about rules, which seemed almost poetic. Well done...Backed. Craig (Painted Lives)

An intriguing pitch and a wonderful read. I really enjoy historical books and yours has all the elements here to keep your readers happy. Backed for the attention to detail and giving a new angle on this part of Scotish history. All the very best, Manolya- Love in No-Man's Land

Furore: David, The local and monastic detail and the language register in which it's couched seem ideal to the period and I had an exhilarating feeling of being a participant in a world of intrigue and upheaval; not least, incidents like the ejection of the priest from his house. In prose which delivers sharp insights, both into character and the period, the first two chapters leave me with the impression that this is very well reseached and the research, in turn, lends plausibility to the fiction in this slice of life which we would otherwise have to find in a treatise, tending more to a dry and clinical chronicling of events. Yours combines the authority of selective research with a sensitivity to what it would be like for you or I to pass through those events and live them - as do your dramatis personae. Backed. Ray (A Child from the Wishing Well)

FURORE: David, I skipped through chapter one with its introduction etc. and went straight into the real beginning of the novel in Chapter 2. Rich in historical detail, well researched and beautifully intertwined with the characters, it is clear that we are in the hands of an accomplished historian. If I may, I would like to suggest you might rearrange the events to bring a little more action and dialogue into the opening paragraphs, and then weave in the historical information as unobtrusively as possible, so that this does not intrude on the intrigue in which the characters are confronted. Also, it struck me that you could very easily dramatise some of the scenes, rather than telling us about them. This would entail very slight re-editing, because all the meat of the scenes is in already in place. Some of the Scots dialect could be toned down a bit. Just one or two words are needed at the outset to indicate the accent and tone of voice, rather than whole sentences in dialect, as these are difficult to understand. After that, just the odd word here and there is enough to sustain the voice. If addressing an English speaking audience, the first requisite is for them to fully understand the dialogue. This could be very easily accomplished. Being a Scot myself - although born in Cape Town - I consider this a potentially ground-breaking novel set in a period of Scottish history hitherto seldom explored. Backed, with enthusiasm. Sheila (Pinpoint)

Dear David Nicol, Thank you for sharing your story with us. You mention “vermin” destroying books I believe, and I hadn’t considered it but I suppose rats would chew at the vellum in old texts. Do I have that right? I was impressed by the quote “There is no true nobility but virtue and evidence of virtue”, a novel concept for the time. In the next chapter, “valley of light” sounds like a great place to live. Your knowledge of the cloister’s plumbing is impressive. I liked the “dead to the world” joke with them “wailing at Martins”. Your research is impressive. In my fallible opinion, you could make readers form an even deeper bond with your protagonist by making him miserable. I’m sure misery abounded in his situation, and with your research, you should know in exactly what ways he suffered. Frontloading this into the start of the narrative would make me care even more for the protagonist. I can see you enjoy constructing times gone by, and I hope you’ll continue. Bravo! Backed. Best wishes, Alan Marling

Here's a fine historical. Mother dies, whisked off to be raised by monks. Quintin a father figure. John McBrair...a friend. The monk who beats them and sometimes quotes St Bernard. Fabulous. His dilemma...enforce the rules of grammar while playing ball. Ha! The eternal battle between learning and fun. Quintin dies. End of era? The electing of a new Abbot seems a bit like the election of a pope. We get Alexander Cunningham. This is completely convincing and there is a lot of sly humour in there, I think. I will shelve. I suspect, one day, I will be able to read it all...in a book. Nick "Mirror In The Sky" (but don't expect much historical accuracy)

Backed February 13. Jesse - Savant

David, this is really interesting. i backe it with pleasure Shah

David, I've looked at "Glenluce" and it's obvious that you've invested a lot in writing this book. Good job. This actually reads like historical non-fiction. I really can't fault your work. Sincerely backed. Joffrey (The Silver Spoon Effect)

You have certainly captured the tone of the times. Every word, every sentence has the ring of authenticity about it. Look forward to finishing this most enjoyable read, but in the meantime I am eager to back.

Backed. Jesse - Savant

This is a book with a plot of great interest. Your pitch outlines it well, and to anyone, like myself, interested in historical novels, and particularly in those set around the Renaissance, it sounds very attractive. You handle your story successfully. The introduction, presenting your material as if it were true, based on genuine documents found and translated, works effectively; and helps make your story believable. Your narrator L-H is someone easy to like, and as you move through his life story, you draw us in easily. You have chosen to use a style which has considerable formality, to sound appropriate to the period setting; and your dialogue contains more of the vernacular, especially Scottish dialect, which is also appropriate. Both narrative and dialogue work well; and the dialogue, in addition, has a lot of humour, which brings in a contrast to the previous serious tone. Your descriptions of your settings, such as the abbey and the countryside, are excellent, full of evocative detail, and enjoyable to read. Backed. Gerry McCullough, Belfast Girls.

Rich in detail and scholarship, and leavened with sly humour that had me smiling through much of the first two chapters. "with these few hastily scribbled words" indeed! And "Was I meant to insist on good grammar during these games?" The speculation on what titles the family tree of the abbeys should bestow on their abbots is delightful. I found the dialect easy to read, and something that adds to the rich texture of your narrative. A typo in ch. 1 - "which had *came* down to him" A narrator of dubious credibility, a long-lost manuscript, and a little-know piece of history brought to wonderfully-realised life. This is not an easy read, but it's certainly a rewarding one. Shelved.

David, Your knowledge of time and place is impressive and this is such a rich period in history and setting to draw on. While some may find the Scots dialogue a bit difficult to follow, I absolutely love it, as it moors me firmly in the setting and among the characters. Because I think you can write well, I'll offer a couple of small suggestions that may help strengthen your opening - and feel at liberty to disagree. One is to whittle the introduction down considerably. Most people will skip over these, but if they're short enough they're more likely to read through it and harvest the information you're trying to provide up front. The other thing is in the first chapter to cut back on the scene setting and backstory in the first several paragraphs in order to engage the reader sooner with the narrator and the goings on around him. Pleased to put this on my shelf for awhile. All my best, Gemi

A couple of suggestions - Repetition of store in the introduction – storing this type of material which ought to be stored – is distracting, Substitution of ‘kept’ or ‘archived’ might improve the flow. Whispering instead of talking in secret huddles would reinforce the idea of covertness. The use of Lollard, instead of the more neutral Wycliffite speaks volumes about both the narrator’s views and the position of those he’s speaking about. The context of the word, in the sentence about throwing of the priest out of the house when he came to collect the topmost sheet conjures an entire culture with tremendous economy. It creates an atmosphere for the speaker to operate his tale in. The entire thing is just so well done. We know so much about the narrator within the first few paragraphs. That he is a man of considerable education, keenly observant, interested in everything from practical psychology and the etymology of words, to the quality of the light .A trustworthy narrator, in other words. He’s likely to see everything and report it accurately. Ditto for the writer. This is wonderfully written. The narratorial voice is beautifully done. The whole thing is beautifully done. I’m reading A.S. Byatt’s new book, called The Children’s Book and this reminds me of it in that she sets out to tell a story and she does it with very little concession to the reader. She basically tells us” I have a wonderful tale to tell so sit down, shut up, and pay attention. All the background she thinks you need she gives you. All the history of the place and people she finds interesting she assumes you will find interesting as well. I admire the attitude immensely. If your book was in print I’d buy it for my dad, who is from Dumfriesshire, so he could spend the rest of the winter in front of the fire giving it the attention it deserves. I’ll put this on my shelf, and on the list of favourite Authonomy books I keep on my profile.

I daren't think how much research has gone into Furore, but it carries more conviction than many non-fiction history books that I've read! This is a well written novel in a style and idiom that is appropriate to the period without being oppressive. C1 sets the scene and drew me in, but I felt the story really started in C2 with the first person narration that brings the scenes alive. Your characters and their environment are vividly portrayed with a wealth of detail that allows me to 'buy in' easily and completely. I'll back this happily, with no nitpicks. Well done.

I read the introduction and the first two chapters. I feel I didn't read enough to fully get a feel for the story but from what I read it seems a solid idea and you certainly have put a lot of thought into it. The writing is direct and concise. You do a good job at explaining what you want explained. There is no unnecessary information. I balked a little at the amount of narrative there is. Not a ton of interaction quite yet, perhaps that comes later. The introduction is a little long, once I finished it I thought, 'and now onto the story' took a long time for me to read. I did enjoy it though. This is a smart read. What I mean by that is that you will be informed and it is not a piece of fluff one can breeze through in a day whilst sitting on the beach. No this is a chapter at a time read. That is fine, but that also narrows the amount of people it can reach. I am not telling you to change this into a piece of fluff. It is fine as it is but I was just noting my observation. An interesting read for me. Backed T.L Tyson-Seeking Eleanor

Hi Perryn The introduction should not be taken too seriously. It is intended as tongue in cheek. It needs to go at the beginning because it sets up the narrator as writing at a particular time and with a certain unstated aim. And it helps to frame the whole work as a manuscript of dubious credibility. So how far can we read it as a 'true' account? The narrator comes to see himself as a bit of an expert on legal matters. He describes the election of the abbot carefully. Then in the next chapter he shows how this process is thwarted by the imposition of another head on the abbey. Maybe too academic for some. But then our narrator is a secret admirer of Duns Scotus, the great medieval scholar whose philosophy underpinned the doctrine of transubstatiation, and whose name is most widely remembered in the word 'dunce'. Or else, as our narrator says of himself, 'Better a holy fool than any other.' Incidentally, in the tenth chapter here there is a game of ball, as I imagine it might have been played in a burial ground circa 1517. So - something for sports fans as well as academics! best aye David [QUOTE] I would be very interested to see if removing the introduction and putting it as an explanatory note at the end would garner you more readers - because it's very academic in tone and that is possibly putting off the punters. The first chapter proper has much of a feel of the early chapters of Eco's The Name of the Rose with the detailed description of the geography of the Cistercian houses and the death and protocol following the death of Abbot Quintin. Also the Scots dialect will be difficult for many. Neither do I believe your blurb does your work justice - which is very much more interesting than the blurb suggests. However, when one gets to the actual reading of your work, it has much to recommend it--you've got the true voice of the monastic memoir or at least a verisimilitude of it - which probably amounts to the same thing at this distance of five centuries. The vocabulary is excellent, and very much of the period. I don't know if others would or would not prefer some of the explanatory paragraphs spread thinly through the text rather than all dumped at once...the pace in some places seems to be very slow. And while I recognise that life 500 years ago was lived at a slower pace and one wishes to convey that, at the same time, one wishes to keep the reader's attention and interest. A very interesting bit of history though. Best - PB [ENDQUOTE]

I would be very interested to see if removing the introduction and putting it as an explanatory note at the end would garner you more readers - because it's very academic in tone and that is possibly putting off the punters. The first chapter proper has much of a feel of the early chapters of Eco's The Name of the Rose with the detailed description of the geography of the Cistercian houses and the death and protocol following the death of Abbot Quintin. Also the Scots dialect will be difficult for many. Neither do I believe your blurb does your work justice - which is very much more interesting than the blurb suggests. However, when one gets to the actual reading of your work, it has much to recommend it--you've got the true voice of the monastic memoir or at least a verisimilitude of it - which probably amounts to the same thing at this distance of five centuries. The vocabulary is excellent, and very much of the period. I don't know if others would or would not prefer some of the explanatory paragraphs spread thinly through the text rather than all dumped at once...the pace in some places seems to be very slow. And while I recognise that life 500 years ago was lived at a slower pace and one wishes to convey that, at the same time, one wishes to keep the reader's attention and interest. A very interesting bit of history though. Best - PB

A lovely read. A well written book that is in fact a time machine. I lvoe the Highlands, but know little of its history. I'll send you to a friend so that he might make a better comment than i possibly could. BACKED

A lovely read. A well written book that is in fact a time machine. I lvoe the Highlands, but know little of its history. I'll send you to a friend so that he might make a better comment than i possibly could. BACKED

I too echo Eddie's comments; why o why is this work not being read? Backed!!!

Chapter 7. I like this, the rolling text, the flow of the language, the scene-setting - all conjure up a very real presence. I like to play with language myself since, as you are clearly aware, it defines people. Recent TV programmes on the history of Scotland have made this more popular and you should do very well wiht this. happy to back. Jim D Serpent's Blood

Thanks for your comments. Hope the dialogue in Scots does not put you off too much. Language is a significant theme of the novel. One of the key aims of the reformers was to let people read the scriptures in their own language, rather than Latin. I have considered adding a glossary, and would be pleased to hear any more comments re dialect. best wishes David [QUOTE] David, I came to this via Andrew W's list of new favourites in the forum. To-date I've impressed by everyone of them, so I'm looking forward to this read. Starting with the pitch, your short pitch gives context and introduces the main character. I have to confess as to some ignorance as to what John Knox did though, my sassenach education must have skipped over it. The long pitch could do with line spaces between the paragraphs to aid readability. The coverage is good, telling me what the story is about, who the main characters are and something of the style to expect. One thought though, it comes across more as a book review than as a sales pitch. Perhaps that's just me, but I feel you could show more of your voice here. Into the work proper. Here I start by reading the opening fourteen lines--roughly the first page--closely and asking myself, would I read on? Fourteen lines of your work gives me two and a half paragraphs. The introduction is of familiar form: the work before us is a translation of a long lost work. The tone though is appropriately academic, complete with caveats, and the device allows for some inobtrusive exposition. Into the 'lost document' and the voice immediately has an authentic feel of time. The cadences and formality of the writing are well captured. Moving onto chapter two the detail about the abbey is quite enthralling. Surprising how engaging such little details can be! This is a measured and almost scholarly work. Not exactly a page turner, but an engaging read. The Scots English in chapter two was a struggle for me in places, but I think a worthwhile one. I have no constructive criticism to offer here, I have enjoyed what I read and found it to be well written. Shelved with pleasure. [ENDQUOTE]

David, I came to this via Andrew W's list of new favourites in the forum. To-date I've impressed by everyone of them, so I'm looking forward to this read. Starting with the pitch, your short pitch gives context and introduces the main character. I have to confess as to some ignorance as to what John Knox did though, my sassenach education must have skipped over it. The long pitch could do with line spaces between the paragraphs to aid readability. The coverage is good, telling me what the story is about, who the main characters are and something of the style to expect. One thought though, it comes across more as a book review than as a sales pitch. Perhaps that's just me, but I feel you could show more of your voice here. Into the work proper. Here I start by reading the opening fourteen lines--roughly the first page--closely and asking myself, would I read on? Fourteen lines of your work gives me two and a half paragraphs. The introduction is of familiar form: the work before us is a translation of a long lost work. The tone though is appropriately academic, complete with caveats, and the device allows for some inobtrusive exposition. Into the 'lost document' and the voice immediately has an authentic feel of time. The cadences and formality of the writing are well captured. Moving onto chapter two the detail about the abbey is quite enthralling. Surprising how engaging such little details can be! This is a measured and almost scholarly work. Not exactly a page turner, but an engaging read. The Scots English in chapter two was a struggle for me in places, but I think a worthwhile one. I have no constructive criticism to offer here, I have enjoyed what I read and found it to be well written. Shelved with pleasure.

Furore Hi David, This is exquisitively excellent and I wonder why it has yet to have more exposure on this site. You write with such confidence and flair, I was enthralled from the beginning. Depth and detail,total immersion in this subject, exotic, disciplined, intelligent, erudite, yet all completely accessible. I am going to rave about this in the forum. A high-brow book that deserves it literary tag, extremely impressive writing. I am not worthy basically to comment, I think this book not only deserves to be published but I think it is good enough to win some literary prizes as well. Great work, well done. BACKED, obviously. Andrew W (Sanctuary's Loss) Now let's see if I can drum up some support for it - best wishes

David: I am totally at a loss to explain why - to date - I seem to have been the only Authonomist to back FURORE. It may be that your novel is too dense, too eclectic, too inventive, too innovative, too authoritative, etc., etc., but those qualities are surely there to be discovered, admired and celebrated I, for one, would enjoy more of the same and I look forward to future uploads. How's that for a bit of Scottish solidarity? Eddie Crockett CHOUAN / THE SALLEE ROVERS / CONDOTTIERE

The author's first novel, The Fundamentals of New Caledonia (Luath 2003), was shortlisted for the Saltire Society First Book of the Year Award.