I love this book! I knew nothing about Jack London before I started but now I know quite a bit - and I want to know more! It is written extremely well too which means that not only do I enjoy the 'story' but I also enjoy the writing. I intend to read more when I have time but in the meantime wanted you to know how much I have enjoyed what I have read so far. I felt soooo sorry for Charmian at the end of chapter 5 - I have to read more. Many stars for this book and it will remain on my watch list until I have some room on my shelf - which should be in about a week. God bless you Margaret How do I know God answers prayer?

Your description of White Silence is breathtaking! I like how Jack London ponders about his work: “To see all that work to come to meaninglessness…like chasing after the wind.” This sentence made me smile, can’t imagine feeling that cold: “Why, he even figured, jumping into the flames was certainly an option.” Such a whimsical twist: I read a book…once…can’t remember what it was… Prospector is such a character and probably represented many of his time. You have a way with introducing London’s average day busy with writing. What a beautiful description of North California, I lived there for about five years and I also think it is close to heaven in beauty. I read chapter 2 and 3 and I like how the romance between Jack and Charmain develops. I will keep your book on my watchlist and continue reading, Alexandra Mahanaim

Your writing evokes a wonderful sense of time and place. I've read the first three chapters and will read more. I'm certain I'm not the only reader who had to stop at the end of one your chapters and search the internet for more details about this fascinating couple. Lovely. It's on my wl and I'll be back to read more. Thanks so much for sharing this with us. Kathy

Wow, life of Jack London. His books gained the popularity in Russia long time ago, even with taboos of the time. My father could probably quote many stories in their entireties. This year alone, I think he was again retelling the story where husband and wife were going through tundra and she was saving pieces of her food so that he could survive. I personally remember White Fang. The stories are a little hard for me because of their sad, tragic endings and I wonder what caused him write such vivid tragedy. The answer lies in your book: no love from early age until he met Charmaine later in life. I read first chapter so far and placed your book on my watchlist to read when I have spare time. Thank you for sharing it here, Alexandra Mahanaim

I read the first 2 chapters and must say it flows effortlessly. I was hooked right from the time his father finds Jack and almost empty bucket, so very well written. The dialogue fits perfectly with the character. I loved your description of the snow in chapter two, floating in the air like a ballerina... This book is very entertaining! High stars and on my WL Mc Exposed

James, Wow, what a MC you have here. I enjoyed this and although not my cup of tea, I found myself hooked at an early stage. I can see good things happening for this book. You have the right voice to tell this story and with that and the flow and pace of the book, you will have no problem in hooking the reader. I like the way you have carried out your pre planning research before you started writing and it shows in this story very well. It is good how you have put it again for the reader and not a writer as so many books are. Well done for this and I like it and wish you luck. Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R) Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you?? Many thanks. Sean

When I read this, i am taken back to my days of reading this mans work. I have two college age grandsons and one in high school. The things they read in college now astound me( not in a good way) and I wonder what has happened to great literature. I remember a famous author coming to talk to our class in high school and I wish I had listened more carefully to what he had to say, but unfortunately I did not. I believe it was Jesse Stuart and I later learned to appreciate his work. Oh teenagers......I love the way you take the reader inside this mans head and what a love story. I envy that.It is obvious the work you put into this. ShirleyGrace The Devil's Stepchild

A different topic to read about and an interesting, engaging way of drawing us in. I loved the opening sequence of Jack getting drunk and falling over! I'm sure its not easy to write about someone else as if in their shoes so high stars for your efforts and I will get around to reading more in due course. Andrea

Panoramic expose of the world famous author and socialite Jack London, written in a empathetic form allowing the reader to experience the trails and tribulations of this American icon. The author takes us through a whole plethora of gullies and alleyways en route to London's marriage to Charmian Kittredge, eventually leading him to a higher plane of existentialism and his eventual tragic end. A fast flowing narrative serves to construct the width and depth of London's desires and ambitions. These real life characters are painted in such a way to bring them alive giving the impression that as the work is read, the scenes come to life making it possible to visualize London's challenges. This biography has been well researched and structured to encapsulate possibly the most mesmerizing part of London's life. High stars. Clive Radford Doghouse Blues

Great story, I have put you on my watch list. I love real life stuff and find your book fascinating. Top stars!! Cathy x

Hiya James, I was amazed how much is in this story, you must have done a lot of research. Good Luck Daniel

Hi James, I took a look at chapter 4, thanks for reviewing my book. I have not seen anything like this on Authonomy, I knew Jack London, but I love the way you have written with intimacy as if you were a witness to the dialogue. This must have taken a great deal of research and it is clear you have put a lot of work into this. High Stars, people like biographies and I think this one will generate a lot of interest. Well done and Good Luck Kindest Regards and Best Wishes Lenny Banks - Tide and Time: At The Rock

Hi James, I've had my eye on this for some time now - I can remember the first time I ever read a Jack London novel when I was about 8yrs old (The Call of the Wild and White Fang). For me it was an immediate love-affair with those books, reading in general, and the urge for adventure in wild places - most of which are still on my bucket list! So, it's a rare pleasure to come across this biography. I see you have marked the book as incomplete - I hope that means only that you haven't uploaded it all, because this is one I want to read right through to the end. I sincerely hope that the screenplay makes it into production and to the movie screens - I can't imagine not ever having experienced the wonderful adventures found in his books, and it would be great if another generation was able to experience them too. Sure, we have so much to entertain us these days, but so little that is based on the kind of experiences that this writer had to share. Writing a biograhy must be no easy task, and I thoroughly enjoyed the way in which you have written this - combining the immediacy of imagined dialogue with the known facts of this incredible man's life. Little things jump out, e.g. 'His mom was a mother. His father was a dad.' - lovely, succinct and highly evocative. Your narrative style is at once a smooth, easy read, as well as being highly informative. Great stuff. I'm not sure what kind of feedback you want or need, but would be happy to comment chp by chp as I read. Highly starred, on my WL now for regular reading :) all the best, Kim (The Seventh Gate) Edit: actuallly, now that I'm into chp 2, make that shelved. One small thing - 'Lights shown from windows and the sounds....' read oddly to me - perhaps 'Lights shone from windows and....'?

This is beautiful. Your setting descriptions here in the first chapter paint a spot on portrait that is impossible to not envision in the mind. I'm also fond of the choice of Jack London as your protagonist. I think the man we know should serve as the perfect character for many settings and I have to admit that I'm quite interested to see what you do with him within a romance novel. I'm adding you to my watchlist and will be back to read more as time permits.

Your word choice and pacing is great. I like how you are focusing on Jack London, seeing how he is a great author. I think this will be a great book, it has a lot of well-thought out ideas. Best of luck. Auna June Catalaysia: The Curse of Five

Your word choice and pacing is great. I like how you are focusing on Jack London, seeing how he is a great author. I think this will be a great book, it has a lot of well-thought out ideas. Best of luck. Auna June Catalaysia: The Curse of Five

Thumbs up and five stars! GK in Love

Hi James, I just want to express my heartfelt thanks for your support in the past and for backing my book for such a lengthy time. I really appreciate it. I wish you continued success with your book "London in love" I reall enjoyed reading it. I will continue to leave it on my watchlist as I want to read more. Once again, thanks. Take care, Alice.

Hi, I am enjoying this story immensely. It is very engaging. I especially loved the first chapter and it was this chapter that reeled me in. I loved where Jack was appearing and disappearing in the fog and his father could see his silhouette weaving in and out of the fog. I also liked how the temptation became too much for the young boy and he drank from the pail. Biographies can be a difficult subject to write about. The detail has to be accurate. You are giving an account of someone elses life, not as how you see it but how they actually lived and what they did. Jack London is a good story to choose to write about. His life was certainly eventful. What a tragic age he died at, but then again he put two or possible more lifetimes into his life. Chapter 3. She was afraid to go completely go in that direction......Drop the go. Highly starred, Alice, "The bed next to mine"

LONDON IN LOVE This is an interesting biography. I grew up reading Jack London’s stories, borrowed from a small town library that sounds very much like the one Jack used (and feel sorry for teenagers today because they barely know who he was in preference to Harry Potter). I like the way you picture him into trouble from page one; a good way to show he wasn’t average from the start. Just a thought, but because some readers might not know his works, I wondered if you thought of beginning this with him at forty, looking at his shelf of books and titles and then go back and show how all of his life’s experiences led to those books. Either way, this is a good read. Highly starred and added to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

London in Love sounds fascinating. I enjoy a good biography. I've watchlisted it for now. Good luck with it!

Re-backing this wonderful book about a wonderful writer - Jack London. I wish I'd known him. Such a short life, but what a life he had. And this story gives us the other great love of that short life - Charmian. Before he (and we) meet Charmian, though, we have an utterly charming portrait of Jack's coming of age, and in this reader's absolute favorite chapter - ch.2, the man, in a place everyone associates him with, the Klondike. A picture of the tortured artist, but a controlled temper. A man in complete control of what he had to do. The frozen mailman of a Prospector is taken in like a whining husky dog and given grudging comfort - Jack knew his duty. This is all quite SUPERB. A real writer on the writers' writer - and there aren't many of those around. A treasure. From Kay with love for London and to James R. Goddard for making him live again (*The Ragged Yellow Ribbon*)

This is a very interesting story you've written. I was instantly drawn in by your character Jack. You do a great job telling us about his life. I take it by your pitch he is a real person? That means you did a lot of good research to write this book. I do love true stories and learning about people. Your writing is good. It flowed well. Great job. Highest stars. Lacy

Hi James, Many years ago I kept a diary into which I wrote favourite passages from good books. I still have the diary. There's an entry from The Call of the Wild, 'Buck was merciless ...' This comes to you from someone who is himself fixated with the life of a great American writer (Hemingway). He and Jack London shared the view that life was for living, not merely existing. I'm fascinated by your vision here; this is a bold project and I'm loving it - I'm on ch 8 and will read it all. It's on my bookshelf. Camac Johnson Untouchable

James, What a trip, staggering after Jack from situation to situation, each more beguiling than the last, should I say 'enough' or should I shout 'more' or should I just take things as they come? You've certainly demonstrated that reality is stranger than fiction and much of Jack's life could not have been made up from muse. You have a keen ear for dialogue, much as a piano tuner would have for being on or off key, and each sentence emanating from your characters is uniquely wrought. The poesy of your prose cannot be ignored, you weigh each word as an assessor would a nugget. Thank you so much for the inspiring read. Kenneth Edward Lim The North Korean

London in Love. You've written a pitch which excites my interest. I only know of Jack London and his books by name. Ch.1. A clear picture of a boy in fog emerges, but - do you want nits? - perhaps you dont need the 'down' after descending. Both words convey the same meaning. Nor do you need the 'rather' and 'thus the frustration'. You've said it well enough without. With tightening up, the story will flow even better. But now I'm going to enjoy the delightful scene of the son bringing a bucket of beer to his father. You have a gently humourous way with words, and have skilfully inserted a hint of back-story and character-drawing as well. Ch.2. Snow 'floating on the air like a ballerina in mid-flight.' Lovely words. You get well into the heads and thoughts of your characters, and your scenes are clearly etched in my mind. 'He wrote methodically to the tune of his own soul.' Brilliant. And the Prospector in the freezingsnow, staring at his feet, seeing his mind's command being carried out... Random thoughts and memories pepper your pages. A bit of editing is needed here and there, but this is such a charming story - it must be even better than the play, which cant reveal your extraordinary powers of description. I remember now, reading Jack London's books as a schoolgirl. You make me want to look them out again. Thankyou for that heavy hint about returning your read! More stars. Jane (Breath of Africa).

James, everyone, including my own kids, remembers "White Fang" and "The Call of the Wild", and I remember "To Light a Fire" each time I try to do that! I was swept along by three chapters of this gusty,sometimes clunky,story, which in various respects is like an old black-and-white movie that never got made. Its greatest appeal, of course, is the unrolling of how this materialistic tough snowbound guy, who only likes to like, is thawed out by the warm ethereal breezes of love, while Charmian, discontented and headstrong, gradually lowers her own defences. The dialogues between the two, humorous and character-revealing, point up the film-script feeling of the book. I did notice some blips, and felt that they were just part of the territory. High stars to the book, which has been on watch-list too long and will be on my shelf at my next re-cycle. Please have look at "Pompey Chimes" (ask Emmett Delaney about it.) David Grant

This is a terrific read. I love London's work but knew absolutely nothing about his life. Excellent stuff.

Hi James, read your narrative. well written, precise formatting of story. easy to follow dialog and simple straightforward descriptions. A well written story and compelling read. Congrats. Mohan

Enjoyable read, full of colour and prose. Dramatic and strong, pithy narrative, well-written dialogue. The dialogue is very believable, just like the characters. Pitch, pace and powerful. Pov add to the plot. Full of emotion and tension, yet not too much to make reading tedious. Good read. Well done.

James, I had forgotten about Jack London and his adventurous life. I really enjoyed the first chapter. The young boy and the bucket of beer is a beautiful episode that illustrates the heart of a young adventurer. With his adventurous personality, how could he not try the beer for himself? The last line in chapter 1 made me want to turn the page. I did read through chapter 2. The Prospector's and Jack's talk about women made me smile. The last paragraph? Well I guess we've all experienced that, just being on authonomy and reading and helping each other along. There were two lines in chapter 1 that I particularly liked: "His mom was a mother. His father was a dad." "...all the possibilities excited his grey cells." Good luck! Georgia Peck The Woman From E.A.R.L.

James, This is such an enjoyable read! I remember reading the first chapter some time back and re-read it along with the second chapter today. I love the depth and personality of your writing and will be back soon for more. For some reason I hadn't starred the book before so I've given it six stars and its now on my watchlist. Have a wonderful day! Thanks so much for your time with The Ark of Humanity and Lazarus, Man! - Scott, The Ark of Humanity

An interesting task -to dramatise the life of Jack London - certainly one of the most fascinating of all American authors, whose life was very eventful. You have certainly captured an interesting episode in London's life , with best wishes from Strachan Gordon, watchlisted and starred.

Hi, Jim, Just revisited Jack and Charmian London, reading chapter seven through nine. Once again a delight! In chapter seven we watch Jack discover the unknown passion he has for the poor., and we see a restlessness develop deep within the genius writer - there has to be more in this predictable, scientific life… Then in walks Charmian who kindles a small, unexplainable stirring within his soul. Chapter eight - a dual that results in surprising passion and emotion. Chapter nine - The dialog between Anna and Charmian is so believable - Like author, Nicolas Sparks, you are able to understand the inner workings of a woman. Not an easy feat - so I hear… Charmian wants to do the noble thing while at the same time, sadly, the distance between Jack and Bess grows. What is fair? What is right? What will happen? I’ll be back to read more of the life and love of Jack and Charmian London! Dianna Lanser Nothing But The Blood

James, I‘ve just read through chapter six of Jack and Charmian London and didn’t want to stop! Everyone loves a love story -- especially when they are true, especially when the lover’s are so untamable and unorthodox. Not realizing the love he needs, there Jack London sits, hunkered down in the eternal darkness of the artic circle -- a hearty man’s man, who listens to nothing but what sluices through his own peculiar mind. Genius that you wrote “Writing took him to ethereal realms, where he could disappear, melt away within the firmament of imagination.” You have written quite a few pearls… “And a mouth which could form a smile, like a river can form a brilliant canyon.” Another I liked was: “Her body turned but her heart could not.” And one more that I’ll remember for my own writing: “Keeping the gems, discarding the nonsense.” Through dialogue, italicized background, and narration, you show us the inner workings of the complex, frustrating, and always loved, Jack London. The dialog between Anna and Jack was especially fun and easy-going. I liked their friendship. And also, the italicized thoughts of Charmian after she received the news that Jack was to marry Bess, was really effective. I saw only one mistake to fix. Third chapter - “She was afraid to go completely go in that direction” I suppose biographies are allowed to claim a little license to break some rules, but at times, I found the bouncing around from view point to view point a little distracting. Perhaps that’s because I’m a writer. It might not bother the average reader. Just something to consider… All in all, I think this book was a very compelling tribute to the love and life of Jack and Charmian London. It is a tribute that will earn the place on the shelves of Jack London devotees - right next to his novels. Highly starred! Dianna Lanser Nothing But The Bood

James, I have finally found some time to start reading this as promised. I'm keeping this on my watchlist and adding high stars. To be honest though - and it may be just me - I found that the story improves as it goes along; the opening chapter didn't grab my attention as much as what followed in the second chapter...but clearly something kept me reading! The characters are fascinating and I felt an appeal to keep reading those chapters and find out more about Jack London. Your dialogue, also, is impressive and forms wonderful scenes. Best of luck with this. I will keep coming back to read more, and I'll let you know if I have more comments. Diane Cannan Drifters: The Impossible Sky

Hello James, I read chapter one, and I love how you wrote this section.The first half reminds of a parable (which I love). It is simplistic, entertaining and to the point. Sometimes I think the simplest forms that are present in fairy tales are the best way to tell a message. I liked part two as well since it told us more about Jack's view on education. I especially thought the quote from Shorey was a nice touch. I"ll read more later on :} Good stuff! kind regards, David

You're on my watchlist as I've been unable to access the book. I'm very much looking forward to reading your novel. x

As a child I wasn't fond of reading at all - the only writer whose stories I read with fascination was Jack London. So when I saw this book is dedicated to him and his wife I got really intrigued. Your opening chapter is beautifully written, from the very first sentence I am immersed into the story. To tell you the truth, I don't know a lot about Jack London's second wife, so my interest to your book was piqued even more. I'm totally prejudiced in favour of your book and give it my six stars with genuine pleasure. Ivan Amberlake

I've read chapters 2 and 3 now of this unusual offering that crosses between biography and novel and isn't really faction. In these two chapters we see the grown Jack now writing away in his cabin and beset by a prospector who, like others before him, regales Jack with tales of his experiences. But we see Jack has experiences in his own right, quite amazing experiences, and he brings elements of them all into his stories. We see that his editor has arranged for a new person to go through his stories, a woman named Charmian. In the next chapter we meet her and find that she is indeed an unusual woman, especially for her time. She meets Jack and after a bit of sparring they decide they like each other. This is, as I said, an unusual offering; one that many agents and publishers these days would have some difficulty with, I think. The voice is unusual- lilting, whimsical and on some occasions nearly flippant when the sentences are short and incomplete in the dialogue, a dialogue that in some cases you really wouldn't expect to find in that time period. There is also the alternation between the story unfolding and the backstory sentences that really read like a biographical essay. These are put in italics as are a few other sections that could remain unitalicized. This might offset the biographical sections more clearly. Then there is the switching of viewpoints from prospector to Jack, then later from Charmian to Jack. Usually nowadays they prefer that viewpoints remain with one person during a scene. But for some reason all of these things are forgiven in reading this work. There are only a few areas though you might consider. In a few sections of description you have many darling sentences and it does over egg it bit. The snow section in the beginning of chapter 2 has a few too many. Though the images are all beautiful it just is too much. I think it's time to kill a few of those darlings:). When you describe Charmian at first you say she is "Distinct from other women. Different from the average sort. Really you're saying pretty much the same thing and I would just go with the first and leave it at that. You also might consider looking at the sentence where you have "cultured starving and poor" because it didn't make sense, at least to me. Are you saying that the cultured are starving and poor" Or did you mean that the poor are starved of culture? And one little nit: "arctic" has two "c's" :) (one for each eye, ha ha). Good stuff, Kristin

I think Jack London would have been proud to know that such a talented writer has written about his short, but remarkable journey in life. You're narrative and dialogue is fantastic -- you have a solid gift with words. Six stars from me, and watch listed. Best, Michelle ~ Willow Lake Manor ~

Chapter 1 I've read the opening chapter and wanted to give you my impressions (I will read more, but I'm pressed for time). This opens with a distinct and almost lilting style with some modern overtones (the em dash and flippant asides) that somehow blend well with the historic time period of the novel to make for a very unique voice. It works especially well with the first scene that shows a young Jack getting his first taste of beer. You deftly establish the rural poverty in this scene and with your unique style indicate Jack's uncertain biological parentage while leaving us liittle doubt that John London cares for the little scamp. The following scene at the library encapsulates well his source of love for books and writing that would feature in his future life. You choose an interesting approach to close the chapter with a wikipedia length version of the ensuing years that take him to adulthood all set in italics. This is of course not the usual structure of a novelized life of a famous person, but I think it works. It certainly rises above the factual reportage that sometimes is found on shelves. There are a few little nits you might consider. On occasion you start with an em dash and then use a comma at the other side of the phrase. And another little nitty nit. You might want to look at the sentence in the opening section: "Its contents sloshing about and spilling over the rim, descending down upon... " If you just changed "sloshing" and "spilling" to "sloshed" and "spilled" that would make it a complete sentence. Alternately join it up with previous sentence using a semi colon. Very different, very good. Will continue on soon. Kristin

Right back at you, James. :)

This is quite a love story, and you've rekindled my interest in London with it. Your style is unique. After I read all of this, I read your bio and suspect that you are writing more for the ear than for the eye, which would account for some things I saw that looked funny but sound fine, including virtually all the spelling problems I noticed. (phase and faze, duel and dual, purist and purest... ) I think I'll go read some of your poetry now, and see if it is eye- or ear-driven.

Hi James,I read your book quite a long time ago. I've come back for more...I'm glad I did, friend. You have a wonderful story here. Very well written and with excellent description. This book has been written with a great deal of attention to detail and makes for a very good read. I am pleased to back your book and to give it many stars. SHELVED. Thank you for backing my book and drawing my attention to yours. Best wishes, Neville. The Secrets Of The Forest - The Time Zone.

Just to let you know, this really isn’t a genre I normally read. Title: not really eye catching or interesting. Very to the point and no life. Cover: No name, no title? Spruce it up! This should be helping you get reads. Short Pitch: I think this can be whittled down to one sentence: The life of Jack London and his second wife, Charmian, who influenced her husband’s writings, life and philosophies. Long Pitch: An interesting little synopsis here. It always confuses me when a book is about someone real, listed as historical fiction and then listed as Fiction...is this real at all? It might be, I suppose, I don’t have all the other tags. Interesting pitch though. Chapter One: However seeing San Francisco was the...—However, seeing San Francisco... Never-ending Lifting his voice--? Is this like ‘raising’ his voice? breastfeed is one word. Stickball is one word. ...nothing in comparison to what he was learned when at the Library he was studying life and chasing his imagination. – too much was-ing—nothing in comparison to what he learned when at the library studying life and chasing his imagination. He would read throughout the evening and ponder...—He read throughout the evening and pondered the great works... I think this would be better for an edit for repetition and excess words that can be cut out easily, for instance: ...and more wind and more fog...—and more wind and fog... Jack, being thirsty as well as being tired...—Jack, being thirsty as well as tried.. (and then you say in the same sentence: tired of the never ending...maybe weary?) The wind grabbed on to his word...The wind tossed his beard... –both in a row... ...or tried to grumble. He tried to look angry. He tried to LOOK angry...He LOOKED at his don...The dad LOOKED at his son –watch the word look. In the short chapter of chapter one you have seven ‘look’s. That’s a bit much and you might want to see if it runs throughout your MS. It was early evening. And every evening... I am unsure of what to say about this, to be honest. There are things to like, the conversation with the father is cute and enjoyable. The boy himself is fun. The father’s love jumps off the page. But, and here’s the but, while I think you have some great turns of phrases and narrative, I think your work can be cleaned up. I find the constant ellipses and dashes to be a bit daunting and found some of the sentences were too long and could have been cut down to make this flow more smoothly. I understand this isn’t my genre and I know Literary Fiction often allows for more rules to be broken, but I think this still can be cleaned up a fair amount. I also wanted to make a note here of ‘was’. I found a lot of it in here. And I wonder if cutting it down wouldn’t be beneficial for allowing the reader to submerse in this more easily. See, I love Jack London, I really do, so I found parts of this engrossing. I read on to chapter four but gave up listing out my suggestions for adjusting sentences because there were a lot and it is a time consuming task to do so. I have listed out a few from chapter one, I found the same sort of issues throughout, the repeating and the excess words, which detracted away from the quality of writing. (I found these careless as opposed to intended, but if I am wrong, then I apologize.) I think your narrative is nice otherwise though. You don’t overdo the description, you don’t use overtly purple prose which is something I appreciated. It looks as though people are really warmed up to this and so, maybe I am wrong about the repeating and distancing with ‘was’. Good Luck with this! T.L Tyson – The Reign Of Billie Blackwater

Good beginning. I'm glad you don't go overboard with your writing. You don't over describe or only use dialogue. You get a good mix. I don't know if this is a true story or not but it just seems to be. It think that maybe because it just seems so real. idk. I love Jack. What a good character to be at the center of your book. "grey eyes" use gray eyes. unless you are in the UK which then grey is okay. However, both are okay. It's just that gray is more common in the US.

Hi James, I've had this on my WL for so long and finally got here. Ok for a start, please excuse this ignorant kiwi. It wasn't until I was part way through the 2nd chapter that I realised this was based on a real person, and then I ggogled him and read everything about him there was on wikipedia! Wow. what a life this guy had. To be honest I'm a sucker for the great love stories and it sounds exactly like what he and Charmaine had. Reading this I actually imagined it like I would a movie, something like Walk the Line (the Johnny Cash movie) and I love that movie so that's a huge compliment. I think you have done a sensational job here, and used your artistic license to great degree. I love the part about Jack drinking the beer and getting drunk and then when his father (or not father?) asks him how he feels now he replies, suddenly pained, "I don't like it much". Classic. I have rated this six stars and will keep you on my WL to shelve at some stage. Thanks for both entertaining me and teaching me something new! Tammy

Hi James, I've had this on my WL for so long and finally got here. Ok for a start, please excuse this ignorant kiwi. It wasn't until I was part way through the 2nd chapter that I realised this was based on a real person, and then I ggogled him and read everything about him there was on wikipedia! Wow. what a life this guy had. To be honest I'm a sucker for the great love stories and it sounds exactly like what he and Charmaine had. Reading this I actually imagined it like I would a movie, something like Walk the Line (the Johnny Cash movie) and I love that movie so that's a huge compliment. I think you have done a sensational job here, and used your artistic license to great degree. I love the part about Jack drinking the beer and getting drunk and then when his father (or not father?) asks him how he feels now he replies, suddenly pained, "I don't like it much". Classic. I have rated this six stars and will keep you on my WL to shelve at some stage. Thanks for both entertaining me and teaching me something new! Tammy

Jack London has long been one of my favourite authors. His stories of the South Seas were hardly PC but true of that era. The People of the Abyss about life in underclass London of 1901/2 still has resonance. This work deserves to be published.

As soon as I read your pitch, I knew I wanted to read this book. Jack London is a reading staple in our educational system and a pioneer writer. I had absolutely no idea he led such a compelling life and I was eager to discover more about this prolific writer. You capture the beauty of the regions you describe exquisitely. In Chapter 1, where you wrote, "Seemed the earth sort of swallowed up his son, then regurgitated him back upon the dirty soil." It reminded me so much of California and how one moment you'll see a giant oasis, and the next rise in the road will reveal that it was just a seamless spread of land. Also, the first paragraph in Chapter 2 is one of the loveliest things I've ever read. Even in Chapter 10, when Jack is writing under the canopy of redwood trees, beside the creek; you've written a simple yet picturesque scene. It even seems to parallel the adventure he's writing about in a very succinct way. This book is the merging of two of the best worlds; you've retained the elements of the script that keep the pacing, highlight the brilliant dialogue and keep the reader firmly centered on the place and time, yet you maintain the level of prose a reader expects to find in literary fiction pieces. I've not seen this done very often, yet when it is done correctly, just as you have delivered, it's a powerful and intriguing technique. There are so many parts to this book that instantly had passages appear as a film in my mind like literary apparitions. It was quite an experience to read it. The storyline itself is very multifaceted. The details of Jack's life, his writings, the romance between him and Charmian, his visions and beliefs, as well as what was going on during that point in history, make this a full story. There were so many threads within this book that kept me interested as I read along. Even though I do enjoy biographical stories, I tend to lose interest in historical ones, but this was not the case with your book. This is one of times in history I know the most about because I worked at a national historical site centered around an event that occurred in the late 1800's, so I became well informed of the time period. Your details never failed me. I found everything to be quite accurate and you explored a lot of components which helped to expose what life was like during this time. I enjoyed that immensely. I hesitate to say this, but I rarely find male writers who capture females so effortlessly and leave them to be the true beings that they are. You've done this so very well. I loved finding the 'Easter eggs' of honesty you've allowed into this book. From the absent-like mother Jack had, his views on females, to the independent will of Charmian, you have shown a true understanding of the nature of women. Too often writers are tempted to pigeon-hole women, especially during this era, but you skillfully avoided doing so and didn't disappoint me for even a single breath. Thank you. The writing is charming and natural. I love that you realized that it was much more suitable for this book to opt for the way you've written it as opposed to utilizing more pretentious and wordy prose. It's as though you tailored your writing style for Jack's life and his very essence. I'm not sure if it was intentional, or the story just spoke to you in that manner, but it's pure genius to do so. It also fits so well with the pure Americana tone of your book. When I come across books so rich in description that are set during periods in America's developmental stages, I'm always enticed to read more. I often worry that with technology and our advancing life in the United States that such a thing will be lost, but I see books like yours as an excellent way to preserve it. I enjoyed reading this and overall thought you had a unique style paired with a tantalizing story that left me absorbed. Best of luck with this!

OK, so I'm just gunna jot down thoughts as I read, hope that works for you. I had to go back and check the genre when I first started reading. I see you don't list it as biography, which is fine as it is clearly set up as a story. That said, the short pitch does imply biography, where I think you might be better marketing it as a story inspired by the life... just a thought. I can't help but feel as I read on that you are telling a story and the biographic link, at least at the beginning is tenuous. I can't help but feel that you cannot possibly know what he thought as a child... "Jack, what with the beer half gone from the bucket..." This sentence is clumsy and could use reworking. I would get rid of the what, it's a unnecessary addition that one might use in speech, perhaps. I think perhaps you have set it up like a film rather than a novel. As such it would work well, as a novel perhaps some restructuring could be considered? Never start a sentence with AND!!! If you have read my other comments you will know that this is my biggest bugbear! A sentence needs to stand alone, therefore should not start with and. The use of direct quotes is cool, it links it back to your original intention. Library does not need a capital L. It's like saying the dog, you wouldn't say the Dog. Aw, another sentence started with AND! I cannot stress enough how much this shouldn't happen! "He excited"? Should this be "he was excited"? Secondary is the wrong word and unnecessary. If you use "more importantly" in your next thought then this is implied. Those are my thoughts on chapter one. I hope you find them helpful. Best of luck. Claire.

Hi James! Sorry it took so long to get to ya, (ADHD on here, yep, that's me ;0) You can certainly tell that you're a scriptwriter, I clearly see your opening interspersed with video feed of what you're laying out for us in your prose. What a great history to write about. And I look forward to reading more. May I suggest... if this is to be a narrative/novel Leave out your internal script writer-musings. In this work, don't spell it out so much. Be a bit vague so the reader can make the imagery/ characters their own. That ol proverbial, 'show not tell' should be followed. After-thought sentences like, "... thus the frustration" should be avoided (we already know by the opening, that Jack's frustrated.) Leave out things like, Oops, unless they are pinned to a character's thoughts or verbiage. That said, you're wonderfully talented and anyone can see you've got great inner-workings. Just don't put every thing down on the page. XO Shelved and highly rated. JupiterGirl (Twins of the Astral Plane) Oh! yes, I am like 20 min from you!!

A great contribution to all things Jack for his fans. 6 stars Dee Farrell Warrior heart

I wish I could add something really helpful, but I'm far from competent to do so. All I will say is what a warm, and interesting story this is about a man with a rich, and diverse life. Having read the pitch, and several chapters, I can see this story is in safe hands. The writing is good, perhaps a little quaint at times which adds to the appeal of this tale. All in all, an entertaining mix of fiction, and fact which is well worth reading. Will add my stars,and give it some shelf time after the weekend. Margaret.

Read the first chapter and am intrigued. Have WL it so I can read more and will move to my wall soon. Thanks for taking a look at Eternal - Beginnings. Have a great weekend!

hello James --'Jack and Charmaian London' Had read this wonderful book of yours way back. I Remembered that it is one of the better books on site, and have no problem to visit again to give it my six stars worth.; so well deserving. you have hear a definite work of literary and romantic fiction. Love the poeticl style that it is written in -'Along the banks of Graham Creek did Wake Robin lay.' love every line of it, it's Historical saga that lingers in the mind.;in it own deep and warm good luck with it tom bye ' from hugs to kisses' obliged if you could glance at mine again and star. thanks

I just read chapter 1, and it was an excellent read. You described the foggy San Francisco weather perfectly. I could visualize it, and I could 'see' the young Jack carrying that beer. I will come back and read more chapters, and when my bookshelf gets some space, I'll happily add your book. On my watchlist for now. Susan The Adventures of Sohi: Mystery of Moon Island

Jack London and wife. Biography. This is doubtless the most entertaining biography I've ever read. Engaging and wonderful pacing. I've read through Ch 1 and since Jack London was one of my favorite authors when I was a youngster, I'll be back to read more. Holding on my WL, w/ 6* until a space opens on my shelf! Bravo! Raechel Echo

I read your first chapter five months ago. I read your second chapter today. General comments: An engaging chapter. An interesting main character. Good deep point of view. Good descriptions. Excellent tension. Good pacing. Specific comments on the second chapter: 1) 'On this particular night, the temperature was a freezing 50 degrees below zero - ' Spell out numbers 1-99. 2) 'Just one foot in front of the other' is cliche. Consider writing the same idea, but in a fresh way. 3) 'He felt alienated ... ' Try to avoid using the word 'felt.' Just describe the feeling so the reader can experience it along with Jack. When you do this, the reader will be drawn deeper into your story and 'he felt' will be implied. 4) "I'm COLD!" No need to write in all caps. Writing in all caps is unusual and pulls the reader out of your story while they try to determine what you mean to imply with all caps. You don't want that. Use italics to emphasize words. There is another cases of all caps in this chapter. 5) 'The Prospector screamed, begged and if he cried you'd see ice cycles forming on his eye lids, "I know yer in thar!" 'Ice cycles' should be 'icicles.' Also, period after 'lids.' 6) 'In front of the porch which was connected to her parent's fashionable house.' Parent's (singular possessive) should be parents' (plural possessive). I hope this critique helps you further polish this all important early chapter. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest. Would you please take a look at "Savannah Fire?" Have a fabulous day. Al

James, I have to work this onto my shelf. I knew I'd like it from my first glance. Young Jack London on a mission, be it getting the beer to his father or studying life and chasing his imagination. In short order, you bring him to life for us. The bucket of beer mission was written delightfully, the prose never becoming self-indulgent, allowing us pure pleasure. So, what to do next? Well, I have to read more, but I am already won over and rating it with six stars, which I don't often do. I will comment again after reading some more. WLd with intent. Cheers! John B Campbell

Loving the first chapter, James. I too got lost in the fog and my boots are now covered in dust from wandering around with a bucket of beer! Lovely start. Lindsey J To Paint a White Horse..

JACK & CHARMIAN LONDON James R. Goddard You write as if your life depended on it. I like to think I do that too, however fanciful the stories I create. I have read through your Chapter 3 and since I notice you have posted an incomplete book, I can't address the work through to the end. Do you plan to post more at some time soon? I cannot just read part of any book. One never knows what delights lurk at the end. Assuming the quality of writing is sustained through to the end, reading the final chapter and looking up to return to reality with a sense of having traveled away, is one of the pleasures I enjoy so much. Your profile reads: "Looking to escape the concrete jungle and move - somewhere, anywhere - where the trees are tall, the land is green, the waters flow, the poets sing...sigh." I lived in Southern California for nearly four decades and finally escaped back home to Colorado where the land is indeed green and the waters flow and some poets still sing. I understand well your longing. It's far easier for me to write in this environment. I admire the way you bring your characters to life. The dialogue is as lively as the snowflakes you allowed to dance in the beginning of your book. It's very spicy. Jack and Charmian are each a good match for the other. Jousting with words whilst getting to know who the adversary is between them. It's enjoyable thus far and I will read the rest you have posted here. However, I have read enough to back this and rank it with stars. Like every work of art, whether it is truly classed as good is merely subjective. Yours is more than good and I will buy it when you are published. Best of luck to you. Sincerely, Mary Enck A King in Time

There´s an enthralling mirror-effect to your writing, James. I see the characters talking to each other via an enormous wall mirror; I love the feeling, but cannot explain it. Your dialogue moves at astonishing speed; your description is lean and mean -- an excellent read. Jack & Charmian are on me shelf.

Jim, I found this work quite enthralling, having an interest in the work of Jack London, but knowing little about his life. You've created a very easy read, where the characters jump out fully formed, with wit and playful dialogue which blends well with factual input. The young Jack is portrayed as a rascal even from the age of ten and you've managed to carry this mischievous side of him realistically through to adulthood. It's very easy to visualise Jack and Charmian's meeting courtesy of Netta's matchmaking, the dialogue is particulary entertaining between them. I wish you well with this. Babs

Well i've read two chapters and no surprise extraordinary writing! My only qualm,coming from the great white north Chapter 2 freezing at 50 degrees. In my eyes 50 is balmy, warm. perhaps consider writing 32 or even lower temperature being it is the Yukon. i really enjoyed the part where Jack drank the beer! will try and get back and read more, (have been fighting a nasty cold the last couple of days) Michelle

Well i've read two chapters and no surprise extraordinary writing! My only qualm,coming from the great white north Chapter 2 freezing at 50 degrees. In my eyes 50 is balmy, warm. perhaps consider writing 32 or even lower temperature being it is the Yukon. i really enjoyed the part where Jack drank the beer! will try and get back and read more, (have been fighting a nasty cold the last couple of days) Michelle

Hi, I finally managed to get time to look at your book. Sorry it took a few days. :( I'll comment as I read since I find that the easiest way to keep track. Please don't be offended by any suggestions. After all, they will just be my thoughts. You can always ignore me if you think I'm wrong or stupid. ;) Chapter 1: Hmmm intriguing start. What is this mission? Oh, it's a mission of beer. That is indeed important! ;) Hmm with the beer spilling and no dad in sight, I think I know what Jack will be forced to do. Yup, as logic dictates, he drinks it. 1 tiny suggestion. I think you could avoid thinker attributions. eg "Time to get up, Jack thought." has Jack intruding between the reader and the story. I think something like "Jack blinked. Time to get up." would be more seamless. We still know they're his thoughts, but we no longer feel like we're being told they're his thoughts. Reading on. I like the dad's confusion at the disappearing, reappearing boy. Good way to describe the drunk movements and fallng over. I wonder if Jack will get in trouble when his dad gets there... Jack seems a happy drunk, and it looks like the dad's not sure whether to be annoyed or not. :) I like the snappy dialogue between them. It's fun and full of character. I would suggest occasional beats or speech tags, though, as I got a bit lost as to who was saying what after a while. Good ending to the section. Jack collapsing. Looks like it'll be a while until he does this sort of thing again, ;) A tiny nitpick here. I think it's generally best to avoid forms of began/started as v few actions begin. They just happen. eg how does Jack begin to fall? I think he should just fall. Next section... Jack's growing up. Looks like he's becoming a real bookworm. Good for him. Oh but he still makes time for oyster piracy on the side. Fair enough. By the end of the chapter, it looks like Jack's got itchy feet. I think he's about to change his life in some way. Chapter 2: Good description of snow. White silence. Looks like Jack might be a prospector now. That would be a hard life, I'm sure, but would fit with what I saw of his nature in chapter 1. And Jack's a writer now. An adventurer. I think writing's his escape from the mundane world. Then Jack's snatched from his book world, back to reality. He's got to answer, though. He can hardly ignore the shouting. I've 1 tiny thought on the dialogue here. I'd avoid writing accents how they sound as in "ez you in there or ez you ain't!" because such words take time for the reader to figure out. The reader might just get annoyed. Instead, I'd try to imply accents by word choice and order. Here I think just "is you in there or is you ain't?" would work better. I like the dialogue between Jack and the prospector. It's a bouncy backing and forth ;). I can almost feel Jack's irritation. Talking with the prospector's like talking with a child. It looks like Jack's getting published. I'm jealous. I don't like him anymore. :( I do pity Jack, having to put up with the prospector's stories, though. Interesting chapter end. Is Netta planning something? Or is Jack just deluded? The question should draw the reader in to find out... OK I think I've read enough to have a good feel for your story and writing now. I enjoyed this. There's a meandering sense of fun threaded through your writing that's appealing. Jack's a good character to follow, filled with wanderlust and flights of fancy. I'm just envious the bastard's getting published. :( grrrr I haven't really mentioned my 1 real worry about this book because I suspect you've written the book in the style you have to give it a playful, easy feel. I'll mention it now, though, as I want to try to be honest and helpful. My worry is that a lot of the book feels like summaries of events eg as in the start of chapter 2, and in the paragraph starting "in the long winter days of cabin life...". Ordinarily, I'd suggest more action, showing such events in scenes. If, as I suspect, this writing style's a deliberate choice on your part, just ignore this. :) I've rated your story v highly and hope you manage to get the attention of an agent/publisher soon. :) Best of luck with it, Pete

Great line..."he was studying life and chasing his imagination." I could envision being threre with the boy and his father and beer....great start...a book all can enjoy..i love reading and drifting off to other places...this morning california was a nice place to retreat to....all the best with your book....can't wait to read more. Julia x

James, Jack London always makes a fascinating read, and no less so in your treatment of this iconic man. The sense of drama infused into your prose is very right for the snippets of his life you've chosen to depict. Thank you so much for coming up with "Jack & Charmian London," and for the haunting piano scene in the ruins of the great fire of San Francisco. .I was left with the happy feeling that the enchantment was not over yet, that more of your book was in the offing. Kenneth Edward Lim The North Kortean

James, I started reading your Opus and thought I would give you my cent and half: The first thing that jumps here is the style. Is a very lyrical style, the writer happily staying on the scene, describing blow by blow, each word calibrated the way a mason calibrates marble before cutting it The result is no so much description..... ....but atmosphere..... .....the difference being on the poetic language you bring... .....with creates emotionally loaded scenes.... .......purely out of description .....and that is what makes this wonderful reading Some of my favorites:" "Not even a" "like a ballerina in mid flight" "ambled on" Some Minor/Minorest/Minormost points: "forever (1) long (1) white (3)" "look angry" "particularly accomplished" I would cut a bit on the modifiers why? because as Updike said: "the modern reader can fill in the blanks" plus don't forget....you are writing about one of the fathers of modernism...lol honor him with ruthless efficiency! Let me know if that helps, Overall, wonderful david

Jack and Charmian London is the type of book that will win literary awards for originality. In the opening chapter we see a thirsty Jack who drains the best half of a bucket of beer before finding his Pa. This is an entertaining beginning to an extraordinarily very well written book. What a fascinating subject. Excellent visuals of San Francisco, engaging dialogue and superior research make this a winner. I backed it with six stars. On w/l – soon to be shelved. Claire ~ Chasing Pharaohs.

I have read 4 chapters of your book. Your writing has a nice flow. The way you describe the surroundings draws the reader into the story. This Jack London must have been a remarkable person. It was funny to read when he got drunk in front of his father. Though if find it a bit hard to read books that has a a lot of dialogue (due to me being Norwegian) your story is very well written and I think you have done a excellent job.

Ch1 Like the Twain quote. He was a rascal wit! Also like the London quotes in the tail of the chapter. What's changed? Ach, tis ever the lot of academics to be barbed by vital spirits. Take those who teach creative writing ... JL was born with a writer as was MT. Who the hell cld teach the likes of them anything about writing?

Ch 1 '...still wearing the boyish grin which would carry him through his entire life.' is a great line describing a great way to be. I can see the beer bucket scene like the start of a film. There must surely be several films about JL, right?

Hi James, I read the first two chapters of Jack and Charmian London, and thought it to be very intriguing. Of course anybody who can write 40 novels in 14 years would be an intriguing subject to read about. Plus anything about Charmian (the woman who captured his heart) would be just as lovely to read about too. Jack London's imagination, the charcters he stirred up and the places and times he set them in are what you bring across to the reader in this biography. For those who didn't know/know of Jack London, this is an excellent way to get their feet wet. Backed. Cynthia Sharing Short Stories

I am taken with your pitch. People Of The Abyss is one of my favourite books, and I believe JL was a thoroughly professional writer. Wasn't he a right-winger of what wld now be seen as politically incorrect viewpoints? Your pitch fascinates me as it sounds as if he may have succumed to the very thing he scorned. He of course wld not be first. I wonder if any of this had anything to do with him going over the side of his boat? Was he disattisfied with his life as a writer? Or his love life? Why wld a successful writer go over the side of his boat? Was he unable to cope with being in love with writing and being in love with a woman? Let's face it the two do not always sit comfortably, writing being so... I hope you will iron these things out for me.

This was very very interesting, Jim! I have always found historic fiction to be that way... and those that write it... awesome, amazing, imaginations and creative well-spring! :o) Laura

Dear James R. Goddard, I do love Jack & Charmian London. I was away from the site for several months, but now I'm back and wanted to check in to see how your excellent bio is doing on the charts. Wishing you a Happy New Year and may this be the year that brings much deserved literary success to a fine gentleman. I've changed my "profile" photo to snag some lost ratings. The photo is from 1978 when I was a wild young thing. Take a look for a good laugh. I really thought I was one hot tamale. Your friend, GK Stritch CBGB Was My High School

James, I suspect this book is the sort that wins literary prizes. A wandering, musing tone, with elements, I suspect, of autobiography. It was a good start, with the story of little Jack making sure that none of Dad's beer was wasted, but then it wanders into a much older Jack. Jack, the writer, 'accused of being a common man's writer' and 'writing for the cultured poor and starving.' I'm not sure what you mean by this. The 'common man' mostly prefers a straightforward yarn, while others, poor or not, who fancy themselves to be cultured, will look for a more literary style. In other words, I thought it self contradictory, and yet it was only London's thoughts. One man's thoughts can perfectly easily be contradictory. More prosaically, there were hardly any errors or typos, one tiny one early which you've probably long fixed in your master copy. I suggest you look at literary competitions. I don't know whether it will have a big market as popular fiction. Marj.

I have shelved your book so that I can continue to read and wondered if you have a moment if you would be kind enough to look at my book. All the best Kathryn brookes The Whispering Wind

Absolutly hilarious, seein Jack drunk in fron tof his dad tryin to explain that he drank it so he wouldn't spill anymore, reminds me of some of the excuses I used on my old man, when I got caught...lol Excellent read, Will back in a day or two when I get room.

Dear James, I enjoyed your biography.Your screenwriter background comes through in your vivid dialogue and bursts of narrative - like screenplay directions. I enjoyed this very much and I'm happy to put this on my shelf for a while. Pedro

This is the second time I've read this but the first I believe I've put it on my shelf - an oversee I'm convinced. This is splendid work, interesting and a compelling read. Kenny

I'm reading again and simply love the first paragraph of the second chap.

I was recommended to read this and I was surprised at this book. You've chosen a good character for a biography. An impressive 'under-the-skin' account, that is both fascinating as well as entertaining. I've given you high stars and have you on my shelf. Good luck with this entertaining book. Granny Way.

I read your first chapter. General comments: A captivating, atmospheric opening to what is certain to be an intriguing story. An interesting, true to life main character. Good descriptions. Authentic dialogue. Good drama. Good pacing. Specific comments on chapter one: 1) 'He had a mission' hooked me. 2) ' ... descending down upon his father's field of - well, dirt.' Authonomy won't allow me to type an em dash in this message so I'll represent it with a simple dash. An em dash ( - ) represents an interuption. Ellipses ( ... ) represent a pause. In the subject phase, consider using ellipses rather than an em dash. 3) "Pa!" Jack shouted - rather fruitlessly, as the Bay wind scattered his words into nothingness - thus the frustration. Consider not using em dashes in this sentence. There are more cases where you might want to reconsider the use of em dashes. 4) 'Dying of thirst' is cliche. Consider writing the same idea, but in a fresh way. 5) "Good," his dad looked into the bucket ... Period after 'good' and 'his' should be capitalized. 'His dad looked into the bucket ...' is narrative that tells who did something and should be written as a complete sentence. 6) Jack tried to sit up, smiled and waved, "that's okay, Pops". Period after 'waved,' capitalize 'that's,' and put the period inside the closing quote mark. Also, when you previously uses 'Pops,' you wrote it in lowercase, now it's capitalized. Consider being consistent. 7) ' ... piloting (at 18) the three-masted schooner ...' Spell out numbers 1-99. 8) 'Back in California he enrolled in Oakland High School, ...' Comma after 'California.' 9) ' ... and students were oblivious to the social needs of the day .... the professors being neither ...' When using ellipses, only use three dots. Using more pulls the reader out of your story while they try to determine what you mean with four dots. You don't want that. 10) Good end of chapter hook. I hope this critique helps you polish your all important first chapter. These are just my opinions. Use what works for you and discard the rest. Happy holidays. Al

A rich source for a story, love Jack London. A great job of painting a vivid picture. Not really a fan of the dashes though. backed Pamela Frost Houses of Cards

A very creative and effective use of a historical character. Well-written and an entertaining read. What more can a reader ask for?

To James R. Goddard (Jack & Charmian London) What a brilliant piece of writing and it's painfully obvious that a huge amount of time was allocated to bringing a serious amoune of hard facts to the surface. The mind boggles at the sheer devotion to his writing when he wrote 40 novels in 14 years apart from the other fantastic adventures he took part in. I really enjoyed your book and I can see it doing very well on the newsagents shelves and it goes on my bookshelf now. I'm BACKING you and you're on my shelf now. Frank James (The Contractor)

Hi! My name is Chris. I really enjoyed the beginning of your biography. I’m going to offer my initial impressions. Please remember this is only the opinion of one reviewer and take this into account if you decide to edit. Opening Paragraph The opening paragraph (first sentence in particular) is the most important in the whole biography. It needs an initial hook to snare your reader. Setting the scene and stating Jack had ‘a very important mission’ works well. It draws the reader in and they ask ‘What mission?’ Plot It’s a real life story, so there’s little you can do except choose out the most interesting and important parts of Jack’s development. You seem to have achieved this in the first chapter. The hook at the end of chapter one didn’t really work for me. Most readers of this will already have some idea of ‘what happens next’ so it’s a bit of a pointless, stand-alone sentence. Characters In the first section of chapter one, you really bring Jack London to life and make him a real person. In the second and third sections, you lose this ‘life’ as you give a sweeping view over a great part of his formative years and fail to give us a lifelike insight into what made him the man he is. Setting Excellent setting of the San Francisco Bay Area. Unfortunately you don’t do much in the way of setting for the rapidly sketched parts of Jack’s formative years. Narrative Good third person narrative, with few mistakes. ‘His mom was a mother. His father was a dad.’—powerful words. The second section, about Jack’s love of the library, although interesting is too general, so it comes across as told rather than shown. If you show him entering the library on a specific day, show him taking down specific books and caressing the pages, smelling the paper, loving the words, this would show his love for books. The third section, from oyster pirate to university dropout, was entirely told and way too fast. There is a lot of potential in that area of his life to show little scenes and bring Jack London to life. If people wanted a summary of Jack’s life, they’d check out Wikipedia online. You need to show, not tell here. Dialogue The dialogue with his dad is excellent! Unfortunately you leave out dialogue from the other two sections. Overall I really like this biography, but I want to ‘see’ more. I want the smells and touch of his oyster pirate/coastguard days. I want to feel the hay scratching my back as Jack sleeps in a hay field. I want to experience 30 days in jail with him...figuratively speaking. Show us his early, formative life, please! All the best, Chris :-)

A very impressive story. I've always been interested in Jack London and this account really captures the mood of the time. A colourful, engaging and very compelling work celebrating the life of a very overlooked storyteller. Backed with pleasure, best of luck. Jack

Hi James, I took another look - at Chap 6 and was immediately entranced. The leap from Charmian's quote into the scene went without any doubt. You've captured so much here and made it convincing at the same time. Wonderful style that adds all the time to the setting and livens these historical characters. I could rate this 6 stars. Happy to shelve again - Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)

Ten chapters into "Jack and Charmian London," I definitely believe it deserves re-backing and a high star rating. Please consider re-backing "The Doctor of Summitville." --Bill

I know very little about Jack London, although I do remember White Fang and Call of the Wild of course. But I was confused by the category of 'fiction' - does that mean you've rewritten Jack London's early life as a piece of fiction? I absolutely loved your description of the ten-year-old Jack's drunken progress over the hot, dusty fields to deliver the (almost empty) bucket of beer. So well written, fresh and amusing. I also enjoyed the second chapter as Jack's character evolves and his passion for writing emerges. Beautifully observed and definitely backed. Berni Renegades

Jack and Charmian London is a mesmerizing historical romance. Jack London had the epitome of a Bohemian lifestyle and you capture his most romantic qualities. Backed with six stars. Walden Carrington Titanic: Rose Dawson's Story

Greetings James, It's gratifying to see a well-done biography of one of my earliest author heroes. After reading "The Sea Wolf" at the age of twelve, I continued to read London's novels and other adventure stories for a number of years. However, I knew very little of London's life until I came upon your biography, which explores that extraordinary life in depth. You've chosen a very interesting subject and done it justice. Your inclusion of Charmian in the picture will ensure a broader feminine readership, just as Zelda's story has broadened interest in Fitzgerald. I wish you well-deserved success. Bill Carrigan "The Doctor of Summitville"

Dear Jim Fascinating picture you are painting of these two soul-mates. I have enjoyed the structure of your story and as a reader I do get the impression of Jack as a quick witted warmhearted enthusiast, a force of nature, beloved by all. Charmian was also introduced to us very cleverly and her remarkable character has been developed skilfully and her strengths underlined in order to emphasise how well matched they were. I particularly enjoyed your snapshot approach to the story. Each scenario has been carefully chosen to bring out the most important episodes in his/their life, with this creative writing supported by letters, quotations from his works and summaries of the times they inhabited and the 'Crowd' that surrounded them. The boxing/fencing /kissing scene was brilliant and the new dimension to these three words 'I love you' when Jack says them an original touch. I particularly enjoyed the passages where he is writing some of his better known works and family life is going on around him ( I think I spotted Charmian admiring his early version of 'to build a fire' and then his rewriting of the more adult version). 'Inspiration and structure arising out of disharmony and chaos' is a thoughtful line and I'm sure resonates with a lot of this on-line community. I dont know how you are going to approach his last years of illness and potboiler writing on his ranch and whether you will follow Charmian for the forty years she lived after his death but I hope you do as she is such a great character in her own right. I read 'call of the wild' and 'white fang' 40 years ago and have them filed in my memory as 'special ' along with a dozen other from my childhood. When I've finished this book and if Authonomy ever leaves me enough time Ill take another look at them both. regards Brian

I had never heard of Jack London but your pitch instantly made me wonder why on earth I hadn't- what an interesting man! Brilliantly witty opening chapter, I enjoyed it very much. I loved the line, 'His mom was a mother. His father was a dad.' That's really great. Just one little note, I wasn't sure about the line 'don't argue the logic of a ten year old'. I felt maybe it should be 'don't argue WITH the logic' or 'don't challenge the logic'. Best wishes Karen Rosario

James, Some time ago, you were kind enough to back my book, Crane's Way. I have finally had a chance to look at Jack & Charmian London. What a great story! You manage to fit biography, history, a love story, and the inner life of a writer into a tale that goes like a novel. You also have an excellent sense of place, whether it's 1880s Oakland or the Yukon, or San Francisco on the day of the earthquake and fire. In chapter 2, you have a nice echo of chapter one when the wind and snow steal the Prospector's words, just as the wind and fog did back in Oakland. It felt like you made a deliberate choice to write in the style of the 19th century (or maybe you absorbed that from Jack). It is fitting and works well. I wasn't always sure what you intended with the switches to italics. It seemed in some cases to indicate a direct London quote, which is an appropriate use. In other cases, in seemed to indicate that you, the author, had interrupted the story to comment, and in others, a summary of events, or Jack's thoughts. It might be too much to ask one format to do so much. I read chapters 1, 2, and 16, and noted the following edits: Ch 1 The wind grabbed unto his word . . . I think you want "onto" or "on to". . . . the bucket held up right . . . You want "upright" "that's okay, pops". should be "That's okay, Pops." A world within he found writers . . . Did you mean, "A world within which he found writers . . ."? . . . a continuing mission he was becoming particularly accomplished; I think you wanted, ". . . a continuing mission at which he was becoming particularly accomplished: . . ." I also recommend a colon in place of the semicolon. Ch 2 . . . which lined the street, men and women . . . I recommend placing a period after street and beginning a new sentence with Men and women . . . . . . grabbed unto his past . . . Again, I think you want "onto" or "on to" Too see all that work . . . You want "To" ice sickles, ice cycles You want "icicles" The door sounded back with a wrapping noise . . . You want "rapping" You don't really need "Outside again", as it's clear that we're back with the Prospector, out in the cold. artic should be "arctic" Sitting himself up right now . . . You want "upright" over come You want "overcome" . . . get inside; A culture . . . You want "a culture" crumbled cap should be crumpled cap "That's what a woman can do to a man!," Delete the comma Ch 16 . . . since its night . . . You want "it's" for it is . . . it seemed to compliment the reality . . . You want "complement" . . . playing a his heart upon the keys. Did you mean ". . .playing out his heart . . ."? This was a very engaging read and I'm pleased to back it. Best of luck with this project! Karen Eisenbrey CRANE'S WAY TIME SQUARED

JACK AND CHARMAIN LONDON Jim, I felt sure I had already written a comment on this but failed to find it amongst all the other superb statements. This is a fascinating study on an equally fascinating man. I really knew very little about him and this is so informative. You write extremely well, full of surprises and never dull. I am so happy to have this back on my shelf - backed of course! Faith THE ASSASSINS VILLAGE

Hi James, I read chapter two. Questions: Is the italics quotes from somewhere? I wondered why it was in italics, but I think it might be Jack's writing. Am I right. Could you give the Prospector a name? It would make it easier to read then referring to him as the prospector. I wondered why you would have quite a bit of this chapter from his pov? Is he in other parts of the book too? You wrote the prospector's voice well. It's just that I'm not sure the reader needs to see things from his pov. I love this part in Jack's life--when someone finally wants his work. (Don't we all?) Also, don't use parenthesis. When you do, it stops the flow of your writing and makes the reader remember that that clip is from your pov. It's like a rude person interrupting. When it happens I remember, "oh yeah, someone else is writing this." Instead, I want to immerse myself in the story and feel like I'm in Jack's head--or whoever is telling the story. You have good internal dialogue and your cold descriptions made me want to hurry and warm the prospector. I hope to come back soon. Michelle

Hi James: It's me again, Michelle (WILLOW). I read your chapter one, but before I begin sharing my thoughts, I wanted to ask if you've read MARTIN EDEN. Have you? We dissected the book in our literature class. It mirrors Jack London's life. Your story took me back in time when I read this book. You do a great job of showing parts of Jack's life with dialogue and action--instead of telling. I like that. I could picture him with his bucket slopping the beer down on his way to the fields. I loved the visual I got with this. We get a glimpse into Jack's lonely life. I was so glad that John didn't beat him for what he did! Some fathers would have. I like also how you've broken your story down into scenes. I've found that so many others at this site don't do that. They jar the reader from one place to another without a smooth transition. Here are a few suggestions: Decide whose point-of-view you want to write the story in. You go in and out here. It's okay to have multiple pov's but it's tricky. For instance, in WILLOW, when I'm in her head I'm in first-person. When I switch, in the later chapters, to Trae's head I only show what he's thinking or feeling and it's in third person. If you're in Jack's body you have no way of knowing what his father, John, is thinking--and vice-versa. Also, when you interjected "Don't argue the logic of a ten-year old," I felt like this was the narrator's (you) pov. It jogs the reader, disrupts the flow. Think of it as a camera. Jack's eyes are the camera. Then write from there--what does he see? What does he feel when he sees what he sees? What does he taste and smell along the way? Make sense? I can't wait to read more. Will this be fiction based on his life? I love historical fiction. Some day I want to write a book that's for adults. For now, staying immature--in a teen's mind--doesn't seem quite as intimidating. Ha! It allows me to act a little immature, too,--something I'm good at. I hope this helps. I'll read chapter two soon. Meanwhile, I'm at an off-location with the intent on finishing my WILLOW edits and really want to stay on-task. Best, Michelle

Foreshadows is such an evocative opening, and although this book will appeal to fans of the great Jack London (like me), it's a story for anyone who ponders the factors that make a person who they are, and who they become. I loved feeling Jack's curiosity, looking for "the new world tucked in the pages." Nice. The story is written well and has a lovely flow. When I'm in the mood for a biography (and that happens every now and then), I'd choose this one in a heartbeat. Lizzi (Out of Sync)

I ate this up. One of my favorite authors. I read everything of his I could find in my 20s. I meant to sample a few chapters, but I kept reading and forgot to put on my critical mind--or you took me into the story and I forgot myself. There's so much I didn't know here. I'd love to see a bibliography--I could go on a London binge for a few weeks. I was intrigued by the genre "chick lit" and wondered where you would take this, given that label. But I see how important "she" is to "him". A dimension of the author I was ignorant of until I met your book.

I too am ignorant of Jack London however I found he came alive so well in your writing. The story is beautifully written and flows with ease. Clare A Policeman's Lot

Love San Francisco and so it was great to start in this fab city. I regret my ignorance of Jack London but he does indeed come alive in your chapters and I mean to carry on and find out more about him which is the point of the book. If as I gather he is a famous person then this book will have to supply some new insight into his life and works. On the other hand maybe you just feel you really understand the man and are giving us insight of that kind. And in the end, it's shaping up as a really interesting story and that's what really matter, I like your writing style too. Also love the episode with young Jack and the beer. Lots of luck with this, Jim

James, it is clear from every sentence in this book that you have a great admiration and love for your subject matter. It must be difficult to write a biography about a historical person about whom so much is written already and then going on to publish it. The world familiar with Jack London will judge every tiny part of it. So it's clear you are (over)documented and make no mistakes. That - in our turn - makes us have great admiration for you. I wish you all the luck rising in the ranks, also on Authonomy! Hannah

Jack & Charmian London James R. Goddard Without a doubt, this is an excellent book. Credible and Jack London comes to life beautifully on the pages. Certainly one I would purchase. Hope you find a publisher for this, if you haven't already.

Jim - As one who has lifelong enjoyed London's writings, I enjoyed your biography as well. My sense is that Jack would have approved of it - your screenwriter background comes through often in your vivid dialogue and brief bursts of narrative that often sound like screenplay directions - and this effect gives a certain immediacy to the proceedings. Indeed, this work could do equally well, and perhaps better, as a screenplay. Certainly some fine movies have been made about writers (the Nin and Miller affair comes to mind). All the way through there are a number of usage mistakes that I hope you catch on further rewriting. And I hope you have the good practice of reading your work aloud to make sure it sings; there's a nasty habit of repeating the same word too often in the same passage. But the general shape is clear, and it's a good one. Thanks for sharing your vision of Jack London.

I've put the nitpicker back in its case, but, please!, it's "Arctic", not "Artic"!

Jim - Your first chapter sets the tone for the entire work. It's the chapter where you most want to have everything as clean as possible, so editors want to keep reading. I'll comment on your entire work anon, but I've run my handy nitpicker over your first chapter and found: "sat down the bucket of beer" (should be "set down"), "tow headed" and "three masted" (missing hyphens), "seemed the earth...the dirty earth" (too many uses of "earth"), "a son which" (should be "that"), "piratest" (should be "pirates"), "Washington D.C. (missing comma), and in the beginning of the penultimate paragraph you "enroll/ed" and "early" twice; be sure to vary your wording.

An appropriate style for the subject matter. I don't know about Jack London but you have brought him to life very clearly. I like the angle - logical pragmatic scientist becomes lover of abandonment through the love of his life. Well done and backed. All the best, Katherine Boyes - The Quizzical Wizards of Id.

I love biographies. I know nothing of Jack London but I think 'his boyish grin which would carry him through his entire life', tells me quite a lot. The weather sets the scenes and takes us to the locations. There is great internal monologue, introducing us to the characters. The short sentences and Irish? turn of phrase, make this a pleasure to read. Backed. Look forward to reading the screenplay. Cheers Helen.

Jack and Charmian London - I know nothing about Jack London I am sorry to say, and cannot therefore determine if the author has accurately portrayed him - not as he is thought of but as he actually was. Unless one touched the man during his lifetime in some way, this is a difficulty but then, knowing is very often only perception. The book: During the period Jack London lived in, the old order was being turned on its axis with new thoughts and ideas. A new kind of decadence had begun to emerge with the pre-Raphaelite and Art Noveau artists, writers, sculptors and science which was carried to new heights by the Art Deco movement. A period of vibrant vitality that Jack London, a free spirit with charm that can only be considered dangerous, embraced whole-heartedly and appears to have moved easily within. The author has captured the atmosphere in his writing perfectly. Jack's personality shines through and his devil-take-the-hindmost attitude, his thirst to experience life at first hand displayed by risks taken to sample it and daring to be different. Jack's philosophy toward writing is similar to my own, if the magic doesn't come, write and write and write until it does. I read only four chapters but can safely say the author of this book is more than accomplished and I absolutely love what he has written. Child - Atramentus Speaks

James, I really like the opening scene of your book - very atmospheric. But there were a couple of things I wondered about: shouldn't it be 'parents' house' (unless he only has one parent) and wouldn't it be 'set' down the bucket, rather than 'sat' down? Best wishes, Catherine

I love the cover page. A very enjoyable and easy read. Dawn Sammy and the Wise Willow

Hi James - I have read the first two chapters. I really like your style. It drew me into the story immediately. I am looking forward to reading the rest. Your story makes me want to reacquaint myself with Jack London's work.

Hello James, Many thanks for backing "The Doctor of Summitville" and for calling my attention to "Jack and Charmian London." Let me say right off, this is a wonderful book (and I'm usually sparing of adjectives). One of my favorite novels as a boy was "The Sea Wolf," and I've never ceased to admire London. I guess I'd call him a "natural," but he learned too from reading others and seeing how they did things with words. Like you and I . . . But let's get on with this. I'll gladly back your biography and plan to read on. And I wish you the best with this because--as I said--it's a wonderful book. Sincerely, Bill

The little I've had time to read has been evocative and compelling. Love the settings, small wonder you're a cinematographer. The dialogue too is wonderful, you've got a great ear. Maybe less exposition and explanation (less prose?) and more of Jack's POV? Promises to be a great story, and looking forward to reading more about a writer and a time that I love almost as much as I love colonial America, biography, and love stories. Backed it, of course. Thanks for backing mine, BTW.

Hi. :-) thank you for the comment. Interesting what you wrote about my writing about London being nicer than in real life. Honestly, what makes you say that? Really would like your take on it, as all research I did, from historical documents to talking to people who were alive when he was - that he was the nicest guy anyone knew. Interesting. Love you thoughts, jim [QUOTE] Nicely done. It reads easily and London is more of a nice guy than he was in real life. You managed to make this seem like non fiction. Thank you for writing this. [ENDQUOTE]

Nicely done. It reads easily and London is more of a nice guy than he was in real life. You managed to make this seem like non fiction. Thank you for writing this.

James, it is unfair! Your screenplay writer day job (!) plays out in your book. London feels like biography but reads like a fiction. I love how your words just jumps out at me, aiding my tini-tiny head create wonderful moving images - I could almost see the 'movie' play before my eyes. Quick write the screen play! Love, Hany & Ericxxx

James, your book is as thrilling and captivating as "The Call of the Wild". I had to go back to check if it were Biography or Fiction because it feels so real. Excellent use of language, exemplary narrative and dialog. Your story reminded me a bit of mine, perhaps the only similarities are romance and the Arctic. Backed with great pleasure David Placeres Sunless Shadows

James have just finished the 14..... can't think on anything more than what i said before :) Diane

James, am halfway through now up to chap 8. as befits the story LIKE it a lot. It is tight and taut like an army barracks bed. You can bounce quarters off this baby all day watching the light shimmering off the coins.... It grabs you and takes you holds you and as i am fast approaching the dreaded 14th chapter don't want it to end. Charmian, Jack et al are so vivd I can see every scene and all characters are 3 dimensional. can you tell i am taken with this? My fav London is WHITE FANG. Will look out and read others. all i can think of for now..... :) Diane

This piece among other things speaks to the loneliness of writing. Though I suspect in Jack London's case, he would have characterized it as solutide necessary to write. We all have been in a place where the words don't seem to flow then eventually they do. Backed. Jedah Mayberry -Slow Train Comin'

James, your writing is exceptional and a fascinating subject (of whom I know little, but now do). My only suggestion is that it reads at times a bit like a play & screenplay in the sense that your opening paragraphs are succinct though slightly short. it feels a bit like 'jumping' into a scene. apart from that - superb Rob

Hello James, This is a great read. Backed on the quality of writing. Kind regards, Jodi. x-Evalesco-x

Such a fun read! I love the way you dialogue between his real life and his writings, so fun! I look forward to reading more.

I LOVE this kind of book. Real-life romances always get to me.

Delightful. I knew nothing of Jack London beyond that he wrote The Call Of The Wild, and The Sea Wolf. Backed.

Jack and Chairman London This is good writing, engaging too Backed Eveleen

Jack London is a good choice for a biography. It is interesting to watch the clash of love and ideology. And I have always thought his place in the American Lit canon was interesting: an all-American writer who entertained ideas that have usually been considered un-American. Interesting writing on an interesting subject. Backed :)

Jack London is a good choice for a biography. It is interesting to watch the clash of love and ideology. And I have always thought his place in the American Lit canon was interesting: an all-American writer who entertained ideas that have usually been considered un-American. Interesting writing on an interesting subject. Backed :)

A fascinating story about a fascinating person. You have done a great job! Backed gladly, Jedward (Knut)

Charmian comes over as a feisty girl while Jack seems an elusive character. An original take on a biography. I've never read anything by Jack London so it's hard for me to gauge how true this is, but it's a very evocative piece of writing.

Hi James, Liked this opener, could see the little London staggering with this big bucket of beer and feeling slightly woozy from it. Cute opener. You handle just enough description with back story, which is good. Liked the lines “His mom was a mother. His father was a dad”. You get his position straight away. Well done. Good luck to you with this. Sar

Cute opener. Perhaps your pitch could tantalize more. I only every read White Fang - who didn't? Had no idea he was so interesting. Best of luck with this. The Tails of Willie Gusty

Hi Jim, I read all the chapters you posted. Could use some tightening up, but you show some real strengths as a writer and as I mentioned earlier, you have a captivating story about a real legend. I have a feeling that people will relate to this love story and its politics too, given the current economy etc... Patricia

A charming opening to fascinating story. I think the prose could still do with a little tightening in places, but nothing that an edit won't solve. Best of luck J A Humm (The Retreat)

Your writing is so refined yet so "readable". It's charismatic and enjoyable!

~Hi, thanks for you're comment... Hm, you're writing is oddly tempting...You writing flows without any interruption, keeping the reader hooked, it is also fast paced but yet makes the most diminutive of the details evident...its quite intriguing. Since its 3rd person I know you won't be able to make perplex characters, but as I read through, I can see that it all comes out with dialogues...original and realistic dialogue...that gives an insight into everyone. Maybe there actions would say more...just a suggestion ^ ^ Idea, hm, sounds boring doesn't it?...just the way I like it...I can see myself reading it every night before going to bed...its real and that's what I like about it...its hard to find realistic literary these days and not many people dare to take that bold step...but you have, so thumbs up for that. Best Wishes ~Xonair~

Jim, I didn't peg you as the "chick lit" type, but this is literary fiction in its purist form. I'm a sucker for a good love story so I thought I would pop your novel on my shelf and read it a little at a time. I grew up reading Jack London's "Call of the Wild" and I can't picture a wolf without recalling that novel. I look forward to reading more about old Jack. Remember when slush! was a call given to sleddogs? Now it refers to the piles of good work on Authonomy. Patricia

Hi Jim. Awesome story, full of little wit and character. Am well and truely backing! Regards, Naomi Lara Fallen Angel

As a fan of Jack London, this was a pleasure to read. Liked the story. Backed. Blessings, Chipper

Thank you! jim

Witty and whimsical and with a engaging insight into one of our most loved authors. I was a bit surprised at how well this flowed. I think your choice of varied stylized prose with an emphasis on lightheartedness really makes this talented writer seem accessible. Backed. JupiterGirl (Twins of the Astral Plane)

You have a flair for drawing the reader in. It takes a talented writer to draw a modern day reader into the past and have the reader actually be able to see it vividly. You have done this. I am backing this with pleasure. Cori "Princess" PS Thank you for backing Princess! :)

Jack's quite the spontaneous little boy who grew up to be more than expected. You certainly have a well written story here.

Hi JIm, I'll back this up! Your conversations are extremely witty ("Seems you've prevented the smallest drop from touching ground"; "there was about enough to drown a mouse on a wet day"; "Still, I'm glad you found it in your heart to save me some"; "Either your husband was dead or you were an incredibly boring person"). You come across as authentic, someone revealing his real personality and humor in what he writes. I suspect you are waiting to be "discovered": people need to know somehow about the pleasure available to being exposed to your wit this book. It seems to me that you have taken a rather simple plot a done a super job in making an interesting book. Maybe someday you'll have an inspired plot and then create a masterpiece! The very best to you, Royal ("An Inscrutable Plan for the Mutant Twins")

What a different and intriguing writing style: sparse, sometimes formal,sometimes truncated, halting, sometimes playful, always fresh. Wondering if this style is specific to this particular story, or the author's signature affectation, i.e., "The dad", instead of "His father". "His Mom was a mother. His dad was a dad." But not confidants, without intimacy? Perhaps this is used to indicate the gulf between father and son, mother and son. And so the adventurer was shaped. Unique approach, great subject.

Excellent. Backed. Chuck

Dear James R. Goddard. A boy named Jack, Had a dog called Rollo, With many an adventure, Jack later became a hobo, A teller and seller of successful tales, The tar sailed a sloop, And was Called to the Wild, He married Charmain, And, oh, what a dame, Goddard came along, And provided this perfectly marvelous literary yarn, We’ll all be gosh darned, If it ain’t destined for the top of the Authonomy chart. James, forgive my poor attempt at rhyme, but I just wanted to let you know how deeply enjoyable a read Jack & Charmain London is. Best wishes and backed, Jack. GK Stritch CBGB Was My High School (another kind of call to the wild)

Looking forward to this but recieved an 'Error page' will return soon. Paula Barrett (Cuthbert-how mean is my valley)

You've an unusual and playful writing style that's really quite engaging. Your story is simple and readable. And the description of young Jack getting drunk for the 1st time is a joy to read. I'm happy to back your book, and wish you all the best with it. :) Pete

Lively and fun. Love the beer story and then that little touch about Mark Twain. You're bringing a vivid character back to life here and kudos to you for doing so.

Bursting with the vitality of a young rascal, your narrative prose trips and trundles through Jack's young life. Excellent story telling, and especially challenging, writing about a writer and the writing process without boring your reader. Well done. Can wait to see the movie. Note: ice cycle and ice sickle should be icicle. Ten-year-old should be ten-year old, or ten-year-old boy.

Precise sparten prose and a vivid evocation of a lonely place – where we feel the no-man’s land between endeavour and attainment and as such immediately identify with the secret aspirations of jack. Like the design of this and its intimate almost colloquial voice. The observed detail always has a nice crunch of authenticity about it. Seems from its early chapters a story about loss and gain – and the conflict between community and the pioneering individual. Lots to admire here.

This is obviously well researched and beautifully written. I would probably list it under literary fiction as well as historical as the writing is so well crafted. Good luck with this.

I just can’t say no to an oyster pirate. It’s a bright and busy précis and promises much… and, from what I’ve read, it looks likely to deliver. This is written with energy, personality and a vibrant sense of place. It’s a winning introductory chapter. Happy to back it.

This is really good. Pulled me right into the story. The writing is clear and pulls the reader along at a nice pace. I really get a sense of this great man from your descriptive tones. I read a few of his books and my father loved them. This really does dow him justice. backed - Clair

Good writing, happy to back Vall Midwyf

Nice solid writing, good story about an adventurous man. Easy to back Scorselo

Interesting to learn more about the background of a very welll loved author. (I first read "Valley of the Moon" when I was about 12 or 13 years old, and it made a lasting impression on me.) F. Ellsworth Lockwood "The Final Cruise"

This is excellent writing. I shall back this with pleasure. RT

Backed! Definitely a fan of Jack London, and you've done justice to him with this piece. I get a very real sense of his life and feel a stronger connection just by reading the first chapter. It's really a great story! Truly supported, CSAndersen

I greatly enjoyed The Call o the Wild and White Fang by Jack London as a child, and this book comes as a great blessing to me, as it must be to all London's fans. A facinating depiction of great author's life and relationships! Lynne Ellison The Green Bronze MIrror

James...Great story concept and writing--flows easy and well. Backed with best wishes...........Frank

What an exciting read. Joining the adventure of Jack London as well written by you. On my WL and making considerable progress. Backed too. Tom Balderston The Wonder of Terra

Jack & Charmian London - I've read the first two chapters and enjoyed them. You had me giggling right along with drunk ten-year old Jack in your first chapter. And the Prospector was an interesting character (in ch.2) as well. Nice foreshadowing and introduction of Charmian at the end of chapter 2. Nicely done. Gladly already backed. All the best, :-) Summer D'Vine, Women of the Trees

I'm not going to comment on the editting as I see others have done so. I was interested in the way you described San Francisco as it brought back memories of holidays. I thought some of the prose was poetic and loved the description of the snow. Good Luck K.J.

Beautifully written. This book keeps popping up so I just had to back it. You tell the story so well. Eunice - The Temple Dancer.

This flows very well and is a delight to read. Philip John

Oh, also be careful of the long bit of dialouge where you don't have tags ;) Not suggesting you place tags on all of your dialogue, just that after a period a reader may get lost. Good luck with it.

I love the way this is written. Just one comment though, and I see you said this was a draft, be careful and go back and check your pronouns 'he' in at least one paragraph I felt it wasn't clear who the he was refering to eg - when Jack is refering to seeing his father and makes reference to the wife, it is a bit ambigious, and although I saw you said Jack was I think ten, I take a closer look at it. Overall, well done and I'll be back to read more.

For a nicely preened lady like Charmain, to be with someone there must be love, but for Jack London just back from the Klondike, relationships must be based on scientific principles. Charmain lives in San Francisco is editor and reviewer for the Overland Monthly, a publication that prints Jack London stories. She first mets him when he delivers the proofs, but can she fall in love, her cousin thinks he's right for her. Great historical romance of two mismatched people Backed with pleasure. Daniel Manning No Compatibility.

As someone who also grew up reading Jack London, I found this really amazing and it grabbed me at the first go. I haven't finished it all the way through, but I plan to. Jack London was a phenomenal literary icon and to attempt to capture him and his life was surely a daunting task. For that alone, I commend your courage, but furthermore I commend you for bringing to light and life an icon that seems lost to today's generation. It is my hope that through you, others might discover the wonder that is Jack London. Enthusiastically backed and shelved. Best Wishes, Angeli Pidcock The Journey of Excalibur

Jim, it's wonderful! I grew up reading Jack London's stories and you create him with amazing life & dimension. Your dialogue is crisp & real. I can't wait to finish reading more chapters. Very impressed & happy to back. My only suggestion is a title in more Jack London style. I love your story. It should be published. And will be. Shimmer (who doesn't gush normally)

I have to confess to a lack of familiarity with the work of Mr London but now I want to seek it out. Excellent job.

James, You have accomplished something rare and meaningful here--you've brought to life an icon. I like how you integrated his writings into your story of his life--it's a touching love story, where he learns to love and cherish Charmian. Caroline KC Hart Summer Rose

You tell a great story and it flows well. The characters are rich and interesting and the dialogue is realistic. Backed.

I'm familiar with London's THE CALL OF THE WILD, but know little of his other novels and had no knowledge of his personal life. This is a fascination work of historical fiction which sheds light on the person behind the books. Backed. Steven Lloyd THE AUDACITY OF HOPE AND CHANGE

Jim, I love the easy going, flowing style you use to paint so many vivid pictures for the reader! It just flows from chapter to chapter, keeping me turning page after page. Much success! Ron

In truth, I wasn't sure I'd like this - I'm usually more interested in contemporary stories. However, I already love the characters here (don't know if I should refer to them as such, seeing as they existed). The imagery was fantastic, I felt the cold of the prospector and the frustration of the writer who needs to be left in peace. And it certainly isn't difficult to see why Jack would be attracted to Charmian. Thoroughly readable and engaging - to the point where I may even pick up the copy of White Fang I bought thirty years ago and never read. Good luck.

Thank you Liz! What a blessing you are! You're motivating me to go back to your novel. I've just read a few chapters. I"ve been editing mine lately...endless rewrites...I'm wondering if you have to have completed manuscript before the editors will read it? That is - IF mine makes it that far. :-) sincerely, thank you again, jim

I was finally able to return to read more of your novel and I am so glad I did. Im backing this again - it's that good - my only gripe - I want more! Liz The Cheech Room

James, I like this books so much! You write to captivate the reader and the result is a reading that drwas me closer. Very good amount of dialogue and ebbed with sincerity. Goes on my shelf! Romilla Forgetting Sally

Thank you Rosemary! Appreciate that very much. I'm only finished - ha ha, finished - editing the first 11 chapters. The rest I'll be working on tomorrow morning. Coffee and me, and the writing pad! blessings, jim

I've only had time to take a short read, but I read enough to know I am going to like the book. Your writing style fits the subject matter and already I feel I know not only the Dad and the boy but also the mother. Already backed from the pitch and will be kept on my watchlist and read to the end of your posted chapters.

A great plot, and lovely writing. Light-hearted, engaging, and professional. I particularly liked the phrase 'His mom was a mother. His father was a dad.' This is incredibly eloquent, and beautifully put. Great visual imagery too, with the earth 'swallowing up' and 'regurgitating' Jack. Fantastic! I don't think you'll have any problem getting this published! I'm amazed that it isn't already. Good Luck! Selena Hallahan - 'With Teeth'

This is so interesting. I must return for more but am catching up on return reads right now. I loved his 'Midwinter'. I even remember the opening words. I read it more that fifty years ago but still remember its freshness. You are doing a great service to his memry and you've written it like a biographical novel. I've done the same sort of thing in my book about a Spanish composer, Juan Hidalgo, who lived in the 17th century. Gordon - The Harpist of Madrid

This was an interesting read... backed

I enjoyed this. Good luck

Thank you Marija! :-) blessings, Jim

Most charming! M

thank you Sheron! jim

Thank you so much for checking out my book, A Change of Hands, I will get around to your book when I am able but thanks for the comment. =] Sheron Parris A Change of Hands http://silveraeon.blogspot.com/

Thank you! Very kind of you. I haven't finished yours, too. :-) I'm editing, and rewriting mine. Still a lot of chapters that aren't formatted right. Will be reading more of yours! sincerely Jim

Dear Jack Love the book cover and it was the long pitch that drew me to your book the first time around. I have carried on reading however not finished the read by far. I spend so many hours a day reading but there are only so many....I have already commented and backed your book a while ago, but cannot see the backing anywhere. So i am taking the time to back it again because I believe your book is WORTH IT BEST OF LUCK

Thank you Larry! Really appreciate your very kind comment! jim

Thank you Miles! jim

Very well written, entertaining and informative. Backed. Miles A. Robinson Song for My Father/ Loud Lucy Ludlow

Ooooh. Snappy. Love the Celts. Will comment more later. No criticisms. Just joy! Memphisgirl

James, I've read all fifteen chapters of this amazing work. It is beautifully written. With touches of humor pain, love and hatred. Your account of Jack's life is intrigueing and poetic. Your style is wonderful your dialogue brings this to life, as we feel a part of the journey as opposed to an observer. This should be published without question. The depth and beauty of this piece is so moving that before one realizes chapters have been swallowed up, as your pace is simply perfect. You should be EXTREMELY proud of this manuscript and it is my pleasure to back it without hesitation Patricia aka Columbia Layers of the heart

I love this book, on chapter three and continuing, will read to its entirety and will comment again, great job, priceless, needs to be published, best writing on Jack London ever, so glad I backed it.

Fantastic beginnings! And I do enjoy a fellow celt. I'll be back to read more. BACKED! Thanks for the read, Scott Toney

What an intelligent, amusing, heart warming piece of work. I really enjoyed reading this. I have a huge smile on my face. Awesome, and backed with pleasure. AmyR Trust Me

Hey Jim, thanks for your positive comments about my book, if you have any time to have a read any more I would be very interested in your feedback, especially with your background. Funny you should mention that you thought it might make a good film, if I'm truthful I probably prefer films to books and I think that probably comes through in my writing. I'll definitely also take a look at your book - it sounds very intriguing indeed. On the list it goes. Will Neal The Sanctorum Effect http://authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=23793

Hi D.L. Thank you very much for your very kind comments. I spent a lot of time in Sonoma County researching Jack's life. The Jack London Foundation opened its arms, once they trusted that I wasn't going to make a "Hollywood" version of his life. Script hasn't sold, because my producers are trying to find independent financing, to stay AWAY from those who want to rewrite Jack and Charmian's history. The hardest part writing the screenplay was that I had tons of material to use - what to cut? The novel is helping me add more material, I have a long way (and many edits) to go. Would appreciate any more comments, thoughts. Will be giving your work a look, too. Many blessings, jim

I was so afraid this wouldn't be good, and I have rarely been so happy to be proven wrong! This is wonderful, and fun to read. I was born in the Bay Area and the majority of my extended family lives there now, which adds of course to my enjoyment. You paint the area very well for the stranger. And of course I fell in love with Jack London's writing at an early age, so the subject is eagerly welcomed. This has *got* to be popular and I will be happy to help support it in any way I can.

Jack London and his "Call of the Wild" is what inspired me to write when I was little. A book report homework project led me to read the Call, and that in turn led me to read most of his other works. Best wishes with this project and I'll back this for you. Dave

Hi Mike, yep, it may be a hard sale. Which is why, I believe, the script version has been impossible to find financing. There are so many things about Jack's life...and narrowing it down to just he and Charmian as been a challenge. Don't know :-) just hanging in there and keep on trying....working on more edits every day, not to mention new stuff....yikes...! Anyway, its a fun journey. A lot to learn, and I appreciate your comments, very much. Jim

I made a similar comment on a book here about the Titianic and its passengers. It is a difficult job trying to write fiction about actual people, especially if the story centers on that individual, as opposed to the inclusion of real characters inthe periphery of the story. One book that comes to mind that is a fictional account of a real person is The Mercury Visions of Louis Daguerre, by Dominic Smith. He does it very well. I read the first chapter, and commenting on your writing style as opposed to the subject matter, you do write well. I still think something like this would be a hard sell, unless you stick as close to possible to the real life of London. Mike

The first chapter, brings the reader close to Jack with the lovely scene where Jack brings beer to his dad. It makes him come to life, which is what biography should be all about. Karien - A Bird in a Pram

Hi T.L. Thank you for your comments, much appreciated. Jack as a boy scene is just to begin with some light humor (a true story, actually) but really doesn't have any foreshadowing for the rest of the story. I do want to note, somewhere, that this is the first and only time Jack drank in access. And, sorry, but what does "get out of the slush pile" mean? :-) As mentioned, I'm new to this novel world. Different rules that scripting, that's for sure. Sincerely, Jim

Dear James, Thanks for your backing of my book. I haven't had time to read all your book but have approached it as a reader in a publishing house would- can you get out of the slush pile within a page and a half, sometimes a paragraph and a half. Your dialogue is strong, showing your background in screenwriting but the scene setting can be smoother. I assume young Jack London's early experience with alcohol is of some significance to his life. If so, the opening is good, amusing. The humour in his father comes through. All the best. T. Bartush

Thank you Denise! I've backed yours, too. Maybe I should back again, just in case? I'm finding several folks who have said that my backing didn't register....and vice versa.... Oh, the trill of the internet! :-) jim

Dear James I have already commented and backed your book. However reviewing it all I cannot see the backing, so I have taken the time to back it again just in case. Best of luck Denise The Letter

Great dialogue and descriptions; a delightful piece of entertainment that holds much promise for lovers of this genre. Backed most certainly, and with pleasure! Amy Love Match

hullo James. Yes, I saw that star trek show too. where I found out about Jack London by reading Call of the Wild in high school. Same guy right? Gee I hope so. Already shelved and backed. Please take a look at my book if you have not and thanks for that. Linda Lou Long Southern dis-Comfort http://www.authonomy.com/ViewBook.aspx?bookid=11421

A movie in the making if iever read one. I forst heard of jack London through Star trek the next generation, believe it or not in an episode with Mark Twain, and was intrigued to find out about him. Write what you know, Twain told him, and there always seemed to be something he was afraid of, hoplding back from. Maybe it was what he finally found with Charmian, this is a pleasant read and very heartfelt exploration of his life. Well done.

James, if this is ever a movie, I want to play Charmian.

Great subject. Powerful writing worthy of its subject. Jack London's star has faded but some of his social reportage - eg The People of the Abyss - is superb and even his distopian novel The Iron Heel, has its moments. Shame about the social darwinism though! I guess you know about the later American revolutionary, John Reed - I think that London is just as interesting and complex a character and that comes across in your writing. William Hatchett The New Labour papers. Backed enthusiastically by the way!

Thank you Joanna! Blessings, jim

I've always been a fan of his writing but didn't know much about his life - until now! Interesting and well written. Joanna Carter Fossil Farm

Dear Jim, I went through all 15 chapters & I couldn't see what you changed in the 1st 7 - it is just as wonderfully written as when I read it 40 days ago. :) I love that you had quotes at the beginning of some chapters - maybe one at the beginning of each chapter is about the only suggestion I have. I like that you used italics & also had a personal letter of his. :) Great writing - thank you for all of your research to bring it to everyone to know. :) Love, Susie :)

Hi Susie - it's Jim, but you were close :-) Looking forward to your comments, and my question regarding shelves and such.

You are totally fantastic, Jim! :) How can I ever thank you enough for backing my 2 memoir books? :) God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)

Thank you Kevin! Appreciate very much. Will be diving more into your work today. sincerely, jim

My seventh grade English teacher was OBSESSED with Jack London, so I've had a pretty thorough education on the man, and it's clear from this piece that you've got a great reverence for the man. Kudos on an authentic piece that moves while staying true to it's subject. Nice work! Backed! Kevin Alex Baker Head Games

James, Well, Jack London surely packed a lot of living into his forty years, but I don't recall hearing much about Charmian before. This is a book that should find a market. The opening scenes not only reveal London's adventurous spirit and clue us into his literary pursuits, but you very cleverly set the psychological background that will bond him with Charmian as well. The section on Mabel is telling, and perhaps best was the sentence: "His mom was a mother and his father was a dad." Happy to back. Niobrara Kardnova (The Trouble with Wives)

Thank you Nicole...enjoyed yours, and backed. jim [QUOTE] Hi Jim What an interesting subject, I'm surprised no one has done it before. I like your approach and find it entirely believable. This imaginative rendering of the Jack London story is so much more engaging than a drier biographical approach. Backed. Nicole (Chosen) [ENDQUOTE]

Hi Jim What an interesting subject, I'm surprised no one has done it before. I like your approach and find it entirely believable. This imaginative rendering of the Jack London story is so much more engaging than a drier biographical approach. Backed. Nicole (Chosen)

Thank you Rakhi, very much. blessings, jim

I enjoyed this very much. In fact, after reading the pitch, I took my time reading this and with pleasure. You start with a glimpse of Jack's childhood and you have managed to capture it without wasting many words. You also managed to capture the time period just thorugh the dialogue and descriptions. You give us the first glimpse of how different Jack is since little through his college days and then later. Charmian is beautifully portrayed and an even match for Jack. I enjoyed their romance and the highs and lows they eventually go through in the start and also I liked the way you give the reader her POV which shows how emotinally tied up and in love she was with jack. I will continue to read this, but for now I give you two thumbs up. Nice work. Backed earlier and with pleasure. Rakhi (Sir William...)

Finally having a weekend free. Planting myself down with coffee, chocolate, fruit, and writing/editing like the wind. Will be re-reading everyone's notes. Plowing ahead and writing 'til-I-drop. Cool, eh?

Hi Paxie, thank you for each and every one of your comments. I appreciate, very much, the time and effort you placed in reading, note taking. Will take time this weekend going over the chapter with a fine tooth comb. This is my first time stab at novel writing, and I really need folks who will give me their deepest, honest feelings. I can only be better for it. Thank you, very much. Jim

James Pitch The pitch left me breathless, and thinking as you’ve said it all, there was no need to read the book. It’s too much of a spoiler, let me read on and learn about Jack myself. Also:- he lived in the day of....Harry Houdini etc. When referring the reader to an era I think it’s best to target the period ie. The twenties, or post war Europe, blah blah, this conjures more imagery in the readers minds eye, and makes the reader feel more grounded in the story. I thought the opening tepid, who is talking to who about what? A boy talking to no one or the wind? Does the reader need that? I would open by telling us what its like to grow up in the Bay, I don’t know and you are assuming I do. I would delete the following three lines:- “Pa!” No answer. Nor even a whisper of a reply. Not even a - I would use elipses as opposed to ‘mmm’ ‘Ahem’...Elipses make the reader draw breath, so effectively the reader does the ....’mmm’ and ‘Ahem’ without you using the words. Written huffing and puffing is OK in childrens books, but adults tire of reading words that really should be sitting behind the writers narrative. sat down the bucket of beer...Do you sit beer down? I don’t! You mention that he is ten years old more than once, I found it repetitive. Also no need for the use of brackets, your writing voice should be loud enough for me to know when you are raising it. he could hear the sound of his father...What sound would that be? This is tell and now show. Walking across his field, he finally came across his son. A son which he would claim his own, but would never admit if he was or was not the boy’s natural father.......What is going on here? This is a big statement with nothing substantiated, explain or delete! Your taking me to another part of the story and not bringing me back. Jack London saw his father.....I know Jack quite well by this time, you can drop the formality of his surname. “Jack!” No answer.( don’t say ‘no answer’ this is very ‘once upon a time’ say...there was a beat of silence, or something.) show me that there was no answer don’t tell me. Call the father by name after you have introduced him....ie...John London, I prefer that to.....the dad said,,,,the dad yelled..or say Jack’s dad, Jack’s father... Boyish grin is used twice, I’d say choirboy look or something instead of repeating the same thing. Dialogue is fine. I suspect you find that easier to write than narrative. I do...But you need to interspeed with a bit of body language, at the moment Jack and his father are standing like 2 stiff poles...ie. Jack contemplated his feet in shame....his father pointed a disapproving finger...give me something to help me see what they are doing. I’m going to be honest because you asked me to. I don’t see the need for all the beer swilling at all. The opening irritated me. I settled when I got to Oakland, California – 1889 From here on, the writing was far more polished, almost like it had been written by someone else.. The opening left me with more questions than answers, all the stuff about the mothers indifference and the question of paternity, was hidden behind a bucket of beer, which frankly I didnt care about. I wasn't sure why you had 2 paragraphs in italics ? If you do this too often the reader stops highlighting in their minds eye. Yes I enjoyed the read, but I think you would benefit by reading your opening out loud, I think you'll find you dont like it. Let me know.

Thank you CarolinaAl! Appreciate your comments very much. Yeah, I do have a tendency to "!!!". Sincerely, thank you for correcting me. I'm a first time novelist, a mere scriptwriter jumping into the novel world for the first time - certainly appreciate any comments, help, along the way. sincerely, jim

Jack is likable. You flesh him out well. Your descriptions are vivid. For example, your desciption of Jack's father. You enhance your narrative with appropriate similies such as 'like some kids sipping a soda' and clever metaphors like 'seemed the earth sort of swallowed up his son, then reguritated him back upon the dirty earth.' Your dialogue reads real and is relevant. Your pacing held my interest. Nits: 1) "Pa!!!" No need for three exclamation marks. One will do. Three is unusual. Three will pull your reader out of your story while they try to figure out what three exclamation marks mean. You don't want that. 2) "I had to wait ten years for this???" One question mark will do. 3) "You bet" Jack said. Comma after 'bet.' This is an engaging historical romance. Backed.

Hi James. You are on my list of good writers in this site. After I have read a few chapters, I am convinced that you are A WRITER. Your opening scene encourages the reader to get attracted to keep reading since you employ a comprehensive plot. The way you narrated your story is superb and simple. Thematic emphasis is transparent and strong. It is clear that you have put a great deal of effort into your writing, are committed to your content and serious about the development of your craft. True love knows no bounderies, no rationalism and definitely, it does not cost a thing. What I like about Authonomy is that it allows writers, of all abilities, to share their work with other keen writers and readers, work that might not otherwise become published—and not necessarily for any reasons related to literary merit. I have backed your book since I felt that your efforts deserve my backing. Best of luck with your writing. FLETCH STORIES FROM A LEAKING MIND

thanks 4 backing my novels i have backed yours.. I added a new one today # 4 of the munroe series.. hope you like it!

This is really rather good :). After two chapters, I can say you provoke great imagery, which is often hard to do and the boy's dialogue as he got drunk was really realistic. Good job! Happily backed. And, thank you for your generous backing of THE CHARACTER, as well!

Thank you Andrew! :-) Yeah, it helps being the dad of three sons. I've picked up a lot of material. blessings, jim

"Don't argue with the logic of a ten year-old." is a classic line. There is a distinct and loving humour twixt father and son, something not often explored by writers and I think you have it at the perfect balance of being not too emotional and not too reserved. Excellent. This is a brilliant opening and sets up the scene well. I cherry picked through the writing and found it not to be wanting. BACKED

Hi Lara, Thank you for your suggestions. I will certainly change, work on them. The title - yeah, I have never been thrilled by it. The screenplay has the same name, and none of my production friends care for it either - but no one can come with a better one. Will try yours, though. :-) Thank you again for the "10" comments. blessings, with much appreciation jim

I loved this. Backed Ariel

I like this idea a lot so please don't mind the crits. Firstly, Jack London is the name so perhaps not a good idea to take away from this impact in the title. How about Jack London and his Charmian? In the opening it's always un-subtle to say 10-year-old Jack .... You let us know twice shortly afterwards that he's ten. the most subtle would be to remove all but one and change that to ' had to wait to be ten before tasting ...' Backed. Lara Good For Him

Appreciate the comment! :-) Thank you. And good luck with yours. jim

Thank you Suzanna! What very sweet, kind comments. Appreciate them very much! Yeah, the POV thing, I think that comes - well, yes, it DOES come - from my scriptwriting soul. I'm still learning my way in the novel world, trying to keep my own style, but follow "the rules" as best as I can....or not...maybe I should not worry about the rules - and just write? heh heh heh :-) Okay, so I'm an aritistic rebel. Thank you and bless you!!! jim

Ha ha ha ha!!! I haven't laughed this hard at the beginning of any novel since God know when. Poor ten-year -old Jack, walking through the fields, drunk! What a cute unfortunate sight! I was right there with him, stumbling about. You have done a great job, of letting us in on the setting, Jack's thoughts, age, circumstances, etc... I could just see him. His dad is funny too. Within a short time we know about these people. And then you skillfully moved to the present - after telling us about his childhood. This is what story-telling is all about!! Well done. This should be published by now. I want to buy it. The only thing that the Editors may tell you about is that in any scene the point of view has to be from one person, but frankly speaking, I don't think that readers care about that unless it gets confusing, which is not the case in your story. Wait and see what HC says.

Hi! Thank you for your very kind comment. I started reading your work wee while back, haven't finished, but I will. :-) Nicely done! blessings and wishes for all sort of good luck, jim

You gave me tears, Lynn. THANK YOU. Your comments are exactly what I'm reaching to do. Wanted to ask you, by the way, what are you views on turning your work into a screenplay? hugs (if I may, in all respect) your way, jim

Thank you T.L.! Very very sweet, kind of you. Nope, not published. I'm actually hoping the screenplay version is produced first. Will venture out in the web to find your novel. blessings, jim

I read some of your book. I loved it! Is it in print yet? I'd like a copy :) VERY well done :) B ACKED! T.L. Doutrich Lilly and Thomas, Throne of Pidl

James, have made a start by reading the first two chapters. Don't think me mad, but something about the feel of ch1 with Jack getting drunk in his father's field reminded me of 'Jude the Obscure' - the setting, I mean. Strange how words evoke pictures. I liked the italics which give us a description of his future. He exists in both worlds at once and believably. It's also a bit - only a bit - melancholy because it suggests a time when the little boy staggering around the field won't exist at all. The opening of ch2 is gorgeous. Again a vivid setting, on a par with your dialogue which is saying something since you're a playwright. 'Not writing is the easiest thing in the universe' - who couldn't agree? You quote some of Jack's writing and he makes it seem like child's play. It's the first time Charmian is mentioned. I'm so impressed with the way you've chosen to write about his life. It works as both biography and novel, appealing to those who know him and those who don't. Reading more soon. Lynn

Just my sort of read- leave me alone, give me drink , comfort and an enjoyable read and i'm in heaven.I read three chapters some brilliant descriptive - A clambake of women, excellent stuff that says it all. i predict the top shelf. Good Luck Wilma1 Knowing Liam Riley - I hope you enjoy it

Hi Craig, thank you very much for your backing! I'm editing right now - trying to find my way in this novel realm. And, yeah, on how to make the pages fit properly on this site. Trying some new things. I appreciate anything you have to share. sincerely, jim

"Never argue the logic of a ten-year-old." That sentence stuck in my head and is an apt summary of your wonderfully written introduction. You have a great sense of humour and a style that immediately puts the reader at ease. Backed with pleasure. Craig Ellis The Sun and the Saber

I felt as though I was skipping along with chapter one...happiness. Looking forward to diving into the rest....x

The pleasure of historical fiction is usually a good story and imparting some authentic knowledge. You have clearly researched well particularly as this is already a screenplay. The sense of era comes through well and your dialogue is a pleasure to read. This is an interesting tale which I wasn't familiar with. Backed with pleasure. Margaret.

JACK & Charmian London: Jack London is one of my favorite authors. I love how he writes and the interesting time in history that he writes about. So it was fun to read about him in story form. Your first bit reads like a screen play (as others have commented). Your second chapter starts out more literary. I'm not sure if you want to choose one or the other for consistency. Enjoyed what I read regardless! Heidi Pearl Edda

Quicky first reply - yes, screenplay came first. Currently out there-somewhere, looking for financing by my producer types.

Jack and Charmian London— So this is the book from which a screenplay was written? Or would have been but the screenplay was written first? I like the style but it reads like a screenplay—very bare bones. I’m thinking of other books I’ve read that were later adapted for the big screen and two come to mind: The Kite Runner and The Horse Whisperer. In both cases, the book was much deeper than the movie because there is so much more included in the book than could ever be written into a movie. That’s the way books are. In both these examples, I read the book first and was then disappointed in the movie because so much had to be left out. But that’s also part of why I enjoyed the movies so much—I went in with a far deeper understanding of the story that I ever would have gotten just seeing the movie. So what I was looking for that I don’t quite see in yours is the meat on those bones, that depth, that sensation of character, that sense of place that is a given on the screen because it’s so visual but that has to be embedded into a book in each scene. What we can’t see, we have to read and then feel so empathy for the characters is created and felt by the reader. Your opening scene is terrific. Loved the young lad lugging a bucket of beer and then his decision of how to lighten his load. But then you threw me a couple times when you told us his father might not be his father and his mother didn’t care for him like a real mother. I wanted to know why. I wanted to have that shown to me, rather than just be told. Telling creates questions that aren’t answered because the moment is so fleeting. It’s said and then it’s gone. But what a reader needs to know is not only why but how this has affected Jack and literally shaped his life. That scene is more or less a prologue so it has to have bearing on the rest of the book and it does, if its purpose is to show us how and why that life was influential on the man and the great writer Jack is to become. Chapter two opens with a prospector delivering mail to Jack, whom he finds hard at work and unwillingly to be distracted. I can hear the screenplay in this and see it play out in my head. And I like what I see. The scene is fun and engaging. Jack eats, sleeps and dreams his books. Again, while the writing here is very competent, it’s very bare bones. Not sure why the pov switch though. Anyway, Jack’s off on his writing career and about to meet the woman of his dreams. There are journeys mentioned but not played out and by skipping over them like that I think you’re missing a great opportunity to engage the reader and involve us in Jack’s life and the stories that gave him the material he’d later write into some very amazing books. Speaking of, are the italicized excerpts quotes from his books? I’m afraid it’s been many years since I read any of them! Charmian is in herself a very engaging character and this is where I tell you, your dialogue is topnotch. It’s distinct to each character and very natural-sounding. She’s a stand-alone woman who understands and likes herself enough to be confident with herself in a man’s world, so to speak. From the first moment we meet her, we’re ready to see her and Jack together. Telling the stories of real people is a feat in itself—you have to get everything right and I think you do, as far as the facts go. You just need to work on fleshing it out, breathing life into your characters and making the world they live in as real to the reader as it is to you. The short, clipped sentencing does work to a point but try Margaret Atwood’s approach and exchange some of those full stops for commas or semi colons and I think you’ll find the rhythm and the flow will improve. And watch that you don’t inject your own voice into the narrative as you do every time you address the reader by saying ‘you’; it distances the reader. Staying inside the head of your pov character keeps the reader engaged and increases empathy. Punctuation: I’m sure you know that needs some work. Basically, periods and commas in speech belong inside quotation marks and never, ever, EVER use more than one ? or !. Also, if you copy/paste into Notepad, all the weird formatting will be removed and your upload should go in cleaner (eliminating extras spaces between lines, etc). Okay, I’ll stop now. Hope this helps. But I don’t want to close without saying that I had no trouble reading through 3+ chapters here—your style is easy to read and the story engaging amd there are moments of brilliance in those short sentences that are very impressive. Your talent does show through and I can see why you’re a successful screenwriter. You know how to set up a scene and carry it through really good dialogue. You know what your characters are doing at all times. You’re very much in control. I would watch this movie! And that’s why I’m backing this book. -BJ

'The bay wind scattered his words into nothingness', bleak, raw opening reflecting the hard life of digging a living from the dry earth. The boy sneaking a few sips of joy, 'His mom was a mother. His father was a dad'. The wind blows relentlessly on through the story, bringing the mail to Jack's cabin with news of an editor for his stories, one Charmian. Then we meet her, riding like the wind. The oyster pirate also keeps cropping up as a badge of pride ... as is the fact that he did things motivated by 'like', which seems as good a reason as there is. 'The keys like you'. And so does he... James, the language is ideally suited to the time and the mood, and the talent of Jack: 'her mouth never knew a moment without the hope of finding food', 'bathed in dreadful anticipation of his calling', 'To find out where insane is'. An absorbing fiction-biography of a gifted man, his unusual wife, and the difference they made to each other ... backed. Possible nits: 'sat [set?] down the bucket ... He sat down'. 'bring his father ... bring his family'. Only use one ? or ! at a time!!!

Interesting screenplay format. Overall, nice fluid writing style. Jan

Thank you Steven, I truly appreciate your comments! :-) You seem like a regular down to earth kinda guy, which is what Jack was. Nice writing of your own! jim

Your first chapter has the sharpness of the scriptwriter, James. It is well written though I found the POV changing in Foreshadows a little disconcerting. Oakland, California 1889 was much better. I'll back your book. Thank you for looking at mine. Laurel www.authorsden.com/laurellamperd

I read chapter 1, and truly enjoyed the dialog and stream of consciousness text. An excellent opening to a great story. I wonder, though, if kids sipped soda back then? It seemed a little too modern for the era. Otherwise great scene, well done. BACKED -Elizabeth Wolfe (Memories of Glory)

This is really awesome, man. I might be partial because I love Jack London and drunk authors in general but the structure and lyrical quality of the writing are beautiful and accomplished. I'm putting this on my bookshelf...have a good day (me...still hungover) and peace, Steven Rineer Technicolor Eulogies

Beautifully written. Backed with pleasure, M - Weekend Chimney Sweep - Sarajevo Walls of Fate

James' Jack and charmian london. nice title , London always catches the eye. the dialogue is so very well constructed and presented , its is a joy to read. the story set in a nice laid back easy going style, i enjoyed the first few chapters, and back this book with pleasure. TOM BYE 'FROM HUGS TO KISSES'

A wonderful subject expertly told - full of rich literary, scholarly, historic and nostalgic value.

Thank you Shah, very much :-) Jim

Thank you Shah, very much :-) Jim

njoyed the dialogues. the farming, plowing, the hard work and the need for the beer. having to work hard to bring food on the table. We all have been through this and that is why could see myself in your story all the way, remembering hard times in my life. I back it for the good read. Shah

James, this is so wonderful. I'd love to try out for Charmian! Do you have funding yet for your script version? Andrea

Dear Johanna, Really grateful, and touched, by your very warm comments. Thank you! Enjoying your own work, very much. Hope this note finds you well, doing great, and finding happiness at every turn. Jim

Dear Jim, Thank you for your kind support, and a beautiful comment. I will return to read some more - when time allows - I read the first two chapters and was blown away with your skills! No, it is not easy to switch from screenwriting to a novel writing. But you are absolutely great at both, from what I can see here... Again, my complements! Two thumbs up! Johanna Kern Master and the Green-Eyed Hope

What a beautiful, enchanting love story, which drew my attention by its pitch alone. Have backed with pleasure and will return with further comments Congratulations on fine piece of work Helen

Very very compelling! Great story and superb writing. Backed with pleasure. Johanna Kern Master and the Green-Eyed Hope

Very very compelling! Great story and superb writing. Backed with pleasure. Johanna Kern Master and the Green-Eyed Hope

Thank you Missy! I appreciate your comments very much! Will be giving your own work a read. blessings, Jim

I love the voice of this book. It feels like it comes from an era long past. The book itself is great too. This is a period of our history that I love and reading about these two people makes it even more special. Your descriptions are very vivid and one more thing that works in your book. I'm going to leave the editing advice to those better suited. I read it as a mere reader and was entertained and satisfied. Missy Mark of Eternity

James, Returning your read. This as an old fashioned feel, despite the short paras and clipped language (though some paragraph breaks seem eccentric to me). I'm not a Jack London fan and know little of the man, so I'm probably not getting the most from this. But I can see good writing and I'm happy to give it a spin on my shelf.

James, Jack and the Charmian London. This is an interesting story: a look at the life of Jack London from a new/different point of view. I do not critique writing as I don't feel like I'm qualified to do so but I do like a good story and can see some really good writing here. I like your descriptive style and feel that helps move the story a long. As with most books on site You wish you could read it all. Best of luck Thank you for your comments Njoy *moods and expressions*

editing tonight...appreciating everyone's thoughts, comments...have just been trying to find the time :-)

Hi Melanie, Thank you very for much for your comments, I do appreciate it! As I'm jumping in the novel world for the very first time. I'm just a mere screenwriter, and appreciate all the help. :-) Going to be reading your work, right now. warmly jim

I like the tone of this - it's unusual but charming. However, it's got a few typos (inappropriate paragraph breaks in particular) and some little nits that break up what promises to be an engaging work. Line three Nor even a - this half sentence makes no sense to me and I can't see it adds anything to the novel. Either complete it or delete it. Line four With frustration that... Drop the first clause. It's clumsy and too near the beginning of the novel for the reader to 'leap' over it easily. Otherwise, it's really very good. Melanie Kendry The Boy Time Forgot

There's a very appealing, jaunty tone to the first part when the young boy carries the beer to his father...I'm not sure that the transformation from script to narrative has done this any favours though. Others have commented already on this so there's no need to go into detail...in spite of this it's got the richness of Mark Twain about it and I think this is going to be great! Good luck Stewart

Hey there Rusty, Thank you for the notes. I look forward to reading your work. jim

Hi James, I have backed your book because I was hooked by the pitch, loved the introduction and read on. How much more I read depends on time and commitment. Enjoy everything and good luck. Rusty Bernard Psychiatric Evaluation

Hi Katherine! Thank you for your very warm, wonderful comments. I appreciate them very much. I'm new to novel writing, being a scriptwriter. I find writing a book a whole new world to explore, quite fun, and quite scary! :-) You're motivating me to work on the novel some more. Looking forward to reading your own work. Warmly, and with much appreciation, Jim

Hi James, So enjoyable that it’s hard to stop reading. The conversation with the Prospector was excellent and the style fits Jack’s way of thinking and the abruptness of his lifestyle. Charmian is so fascinating that she almost feels like an imagined character. I didn’t know much about her and found her amazing, so entertaining with your dialogue. Jack’s bluff personality simply enhances the scenes once he comes in. It flows so well with this tailored style and looks like a superb reading experience. Shelved with pleasure – Katherine (The Swan Bonnet)

Hi Lynda, thank you for your comments, as I'm NOT an editor, and a first time novel writer, I appreciate them very much. Thank you for your notes...I take them very seriously. For scriptwriting, even though I've done a lot of it, I have an editor working with me before I ever send off anything to a producer. The novel writing is, again, new, and I appreciate all the help I can get. On YOUR novel, really really like it. I'm into the 3rd chapter. Flows well, is very visual. ATTENTION GRABBING! thank you, and looking forward to reading more, and looking forward to more of your comments, jim [QUOTE] The opening passage is lovely, bringing us into the character of the boy and the dad, though some passages seem like bumps on a smooth road -- those describing the mother. They would be better presented more from the characters POV and less the narrators. I must say there are places where my editor's fingers itch to fix a few small things and the work could use a good proofing -- but the basic story is sound, so anything else is picayune. In the second passage we find a bit of the same problems. The bit about nurture and Jennie don't belong here, stick out like a sore thumb and the narrator intrudes upon our communication with the character. That's it for chapter one. Did I fail to mention how much I enjoy the approach and the story? On to the next. [ENDQUOTE]

Chapter two: I like the dual perspective. There are spots in the narrative needing some loving attention, and I would encourage you to use fewer phrases and punctuation and more complete sentences. Although the words are lovely, something seems to be missing, and when I sit and dwell on the problem, it comes to me. The phrases and disjointed thoughts destroy the rhythm of the work -- something rarely spoken of but entirely important. A smooth and flowing rhythm takes us effortlessly along the story. Stops and starts are hard to "get into" if my rambling words here make any sense to you. You are a natural born story-teller, this is evident, and you have much talent with words. All this needs is a little spit and polish and it will be a true gem. (Spoken like an editor, I know -- but oh, so true.) I'm going to back this and will be back to read more later. Is there any section of your posted work you'd like me to review in detail? Lynda

The opening passage is lovely, bringing us into the character of the boy and the dad, though some passages seem like bumps on a smooth road -- those describing the mother. They would be better presented more from the characters POV and less the narrators. I must say there are places where my editor's fingers itch to fix a few small things and the work could use a good proofing -- but the basic story is sound, so anything else is picayune. In the second passage we find a bit of the same problems. The bit about nurture and Jennie don't belong here, stick out like a sore thumb and the narrator intrudes upon our communication with the character. That's it for chapter one. Did I fail to mention how much I enjoy the approach and the story? On to the next.

Hey there, :-) Thank you, appreciate your comment very much! blessings, and good luck to you, too jim

So far I quite like this book. I've just read the first chapter, but it sets a very distinct tone, which is promising. The first little bit was a little hard to follow, though. The narration was a bit too jerky, I think. Maybe a few too many dashes. I think something that would make the introductory scene (I mean, this is just my personal viewpoint) could be to write it following the perspective of Jack, rather than including his father's train of thought as well. That way we get to know Jack intimately right off the bat. You portray the character very well though, and in such a short time, I've already laughed out loud at least thrice. Will continue reading! Zoe.

This is a very interesting and well written piece of fiction surrounding one of my favourite writers. I certainly can see this working incredibly well as a film as the work is both visual and rich in detail. Jack is both a fascinating and a driven character. If I have a very minor nitpick it would be with lines like 'tick you off...' It ust didn't read like a phrase that would have been used in teh nineteenth century. I may well be wrong. Still, this is very minor as I enjoyed this work enormously. I really like the punchiness of some of your short sentences. When married with some of your lyrical prose it makes for a very interesting voice. Backed with pleasure. Carl The Time hunters

Your dialogue is endearing and funny, it captures the moment in a father, son relationship which difines each of them. I was very distracted by the interrupting spaces between un finished sentences and had to over read to get the jist at times, which is a shame. Not a lover of adverbs, think you could get rid of those, but the research that underpins this is a joy and I love it when an author makes figures of history into real, believable people, you have achieved this. Has my backing one hundred percent, good luck, love Mary

The dialogue in your book is well written and realistic - it helps keep the pace of the story flowing nicely. Your character development of Jack is well done and your use of imagery is excellent. Your descriptive writing style makes your finely crafted novel a pleasure to read. Backed. Andrew Burans The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Read chapter 1 to 5. I found this an interesting read as I knew little about Jack London but now feel I know a lot more. you do a good job of getting inside his thoughts. Just a couple of thoughts: you use a lot of hyphens there are a lot of 'well,'s in the first chapter which become a distraction. chapter 2 snow 'in your face' - this addresses the reader directly Overall, this made for an interesting and educational read. Jim Darcy The Firelord's Crown

I LOVED the first chapter. Your dialogue is great, as I would expect form a script witer, but what I loved was the back and forth between father an son. More so, I imagined his dad laughing at him, and it reminded me of my dad, the cop, who would probably do the same thing. Point is I enjoyed the writing, I enjoyed the introduction and I want to read on. I will read more later, but I am backing you. TY RC

Dear James, I got so excited when I saw that you had backed, "Tell Me True Love Stories." :) Thanks so very much. :) Since I have already "backed" your book, I will put your book on my "watchlist." Could you please take a moment to "back" my completed edited memoir version, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not?" I'd be ever so grateful. :) Thank you. :) Love, Susie :) authonomy quotes: "Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs. When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved...authonomy

Thank you Yasmin! Looking forward to reading your work....which I'm diving into right now. Jim

Dear James Your book inspires and threads a fine path. It is stimulating and provocative in content. Your style of writing is unique and offers up a treat. It was indeed a pleasure to read it. Backed The Lord of the Dawn.

Really well done, I loved it. Good luck with it. E.Loraine Royal Blood Chronicles book one

Hi Scott, Thank you for much for your very kind comments. Appreciate them very much. Looking forward to reading your own works. Sincerely and kindly, Jim

James, how are you? Great pitch--I found your writing style impressive and the descriptions—stylish. The characters are compelling and there is something special about the pace, it drew me, supporting the setting and atmosphere beautifully. I wish you the best I loved it, Scott The Esrevinu Chronicles/Secrets of the Elephant Rocks

Thank you Mel, for your very kind comments. I appreciate them very much. Trying to get the bugs out of the script, typos, formats and such...will have more to send this weekend. Sincerely, Jim

Thank you Denise, for reading LONDON, I truly appreciate your kind comments. Will certainly read yours! I'm new to this site, so first need to figure out how to find your book. :-) Blessings, Jim

Hi Robert, Thank you for your comments! Will indeed give your book a read. I'm new here, by the way, and not sure how to find everyone and their books...shall do some digging. Jim

Hi Abi, Thank you for your very nice comments. I appreciate the critique, very very much. Now, if I can only make the page style - or format work for me - that will be a big help. At least on my end, everything looks rather messed up. Sincerely, Jim

Hi Kay! Thank you for your comments. And your typo notes! Yikes! Insanity, I tell you, trying to find them all. They keep slipping by me. I must tell you I'm shocked, amazed, at the response. I noticed, to my horror, that the text looks all - what - chaotic. How do I make nice, lined, straight, pages? Thank you so much for your time in reading! Looking forward to more of your thoughts, Jim

James, this is every bit as charming as Jack London was himself, but you have your own charming and unique voice as a writer. I'm still reading, and surprised though I was to find myself in the Klondike after the first chapter with Jack as a boy, I liked the way you did it. And now we meet Charmian - and what a glorious meeting you've portrayed. I'm feeling kinda sad Kate Hepburn isn't around to play her in the inevitable movie! I felt so much for him as a boy - who wouldn't? I loved "Time to study and time to learn... just don't forget the living". I'm with him at the library - same here! And if you ever need it, there's a great alternative title for you in "The Oyster Pirate"!! In the Klondike, those passages are absolutely stunning. The piece inside the cabin seems to come from Jack's own heart. ONE thing there... the Mailman's surprise at seeing Jack writing. Would he know Jack's writing something other than letters?? It just jarred me a tiny bit. Or does he think it strange he's writing anything at all? (Being the mailman...). Maybe he could just think it strange someone is writing so many? (Then of course he discovers it's a book as you have it. So I realized he didn't know that's what Jack does, and that's why I ask.) The rest of that whole scenario is wonderful, and Jack's thoughts on Mabel, too. There are a few typos - don't know if you want those now!! ".......its publisher, Netta....." (not it's) ".......a good occasion to get used to." (you have "too") "...... parent's fashionable house" (should be parents' ) ".......comfort in it's hope......" (its). Sorry - only nitpicks. Tell me to shut up. Charmian - what an intro. Lovely. And her meeting Jack is just divine, absolutely divine. I've backed this work already - reading more as and when I can. (It's of special interest to me!!), and I just adore your style, James. I wish you every success in the world with it. Kay ("Waystation to Prosperity Street")

Jack, right from the start, is a loveable character, as real as any ten year old I know. There's a real sense of reality to this piece. I was there in that field because of your wonderful descriptions. The only thing I'd suggest is to check the punctuation and capitalisation around your dialogue. For example: Jack tried to sit up, smile, and waved[.] "[T]hat's okay, Pops." Other than that, this is a fabulous piece, and I have backed it with pleasure. Abi xxx

I love the storyline. You have a romantic voice that spills over into your wonderful descriptions. Backed. I hope you will give mine a read and back it if you like it. Best, Robert Golden Conspiracy

James I just loved this book, but I am that way bent. It was a good flow for me and it says fiction and biography. I tend to think this is a story about you and well done. It is poetic in its way and I am happy to SHELVE this book Would you take the time to read some of my book and give me your feedback. All comments are always welcome, one can never get too much help. and if you like it please back it. BACKED BEST OF LUCK Denise

This is a compelling read and one that was difficult to put down. Your writing style is easy to read. Very happy to shelve Melxx Impeding Justice.

I've never read the books of Jack London but many people have and will be delighted with your biography. But for those readers like me, it's the form your biography takes that's so appealing. It's like a novel - a very well-written one. Obviously you begin with Jack's boyhood, beautifully described and charming with his getting drunk. This is not a famous writer but a real little boy. And who isn't interested in real, believable characters? I will keep this on my shelf to see how his character develops but back it now. Lynn

JACK & CHARMIAN LONDON This is an interesting story: a look at the life of Jack London from a fresh point of view. I’m not sure who your audience for this will be; I suspect female young adults as Charmian will be featured in the story. That makes me a little concerned that your audience won’t be as familiar with Jack London’s books as they are with Harry Potter’s. Makes he wonder if you should begin with an overview that describes Jack London’s books and how he once was the most exciting author for young adults to read. Either way, this is well written. I’ve added it to my shelf. Burgio (Grain of Salt).

This was rather good. Best wishes, Barry .

Dear James, I love that you've taken the time to write Jack London - I read "Call of the Wild" & "To Build A Fire." :) Before I began to read your book, I was prepared by your pitch, which was very well done. :) Your story is good because you create interest by having short paragraphs & lots of dialogue, which makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. I'm "backing" your book. :) "When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved"...authonomy quote. :) Please "back" my TWO memoir books, "He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not" & my completed memoir unedited version? "Tell Me True Love Stories," which tells at the end, my illness now & 6th abusive marriage." Thanks, Susie :) additional authonomy quote: "Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs." :)

backed :) Love, Susie :)