This is a very unusual piece of work - very smart and adult-oriented, yet told in a style that appeals to kids. There's some very smart satire on the go here; perhaps even having a go at the potential readership, as well as the phenomenon of tagging drug references onto innocent pieces of work... And yet, doing a very smart, wry job of it. Intriguing work P

This is a very unusual piece of work - very smart and adult-oriented, yet told in a style that appeals to kids. There's some very smart satire on the go here; perhaps even having a go at the potential readership, as well as the phenomenon of tagging drug references onto innocent pieces of work... And yet, doing a very smart, wry job of it. Intriguing work P

"Look at his funny face and happy smile." Tense shift, from immediate past to present. Tense shifts are a VERY big writer no-no. I have the distinct feeling you did this on purpose. Sorry, but it doesn't work. Tense shifts will eventually completely confuse a reader. That's why they're such big no-nos. Pick a tense, and stick with it. You start our VERY well, however, focused on your main character. Well done. I am just flat amazed at the vast number of writers who start a story by wandering all over the landscape and then accidentally tripping over the main character. Describing the MC FIRST, and the milieu SECOND, is absolutely the way to go.

Such a fascinating book! This is unlike anything I've read on here and that is a definite positive. I like your narrative voice, and you've got an awesome imagination. I enjoyed this and since it was complete, I skipped around to later chapters and your writing and story development stays consistent throughout. Good luck with this. Missy Mark of Eternity

Such a fascinating book! This is unlike anything I've read on here and that is a definite positive. I like your narrative voice, and you've got an awesome imagination. I enjoyed this and since it was complete, I skipped around to later chapters and your writing and story development stays consistent throughout. Good luck with this. Missy Mark of Eternity

You are totally fantastic, Gem! :) How can I ever thank you enough for backing my memoirs book? :) God bless you. :) Love, Susie :)

Great writng and imaginative story happily backed he Mind setter

Magic roundabout meets a heavy dose of post modern irony.... BACKED

Magic roundabout meets a heavy dose of post modern irony.... BACKED

Hands down - one of my favorites here in a long while! Well written, unique and imaginative! backed 100% Liz The Cheech Room A Fine Pickle

Hands down - one of my favorites here in a long while! Well written, unique and imaginative! backed 100% Liz The Cheech Room A Fine Pickle

You have written a very interesting and unique storyline, which I do like, and created a most memorable cast of main characters. The dialogue is realistic and well written and the pace of your story flows well. All of this along with your descriptive writing ensures that your work will appeal to the childrens audience. Backed with pleasure. Andrew Burans The Reluctant Warrior: The Beginning

Dear Gem, I love your cute story :) - could we become stars? :) - Great question by Torrind. :) You pitch prepared me for my read & you fantastic crisp dialogue & paragraphs made for an enjoyable read. :) I love their adventure & then thinking others would be worrying about them, so they'd better get home. :) I've backed your book :) - could you please take a moment to back my memoirs book? :) Thanks so very much. :) Love, Susie :) This is information from authonomy (so beware of any other untrue information you may receive that is spam & not quotes of authonomy): "When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved" "Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs."

Gem, You've crafted a delightful adventure into Mushroomland which is sure to delight the little ones. Backed.

this is good idea, a fairy- story for adults. however l do like children's story, and can see 'adult' and other themes in them, in the same way a child could read yours and find 'innocent' themes there. you write very well, and the book is indeed very enjoyable... one thing: maybe too much info in pitch...l shall put this on my watchlist... read SEASONS...

Fantasy is not my forte but this story is enticing. The dialogue is easy and moves the story forward. A little more “showing” and character development will go a long way. After the first 5 chapters I jumped to 15 and read through 20. The voice is steady. Young readers should have a ball with this story. Backed with pleasure. Good luck. Dan PS. Could you please check mine? Comment/backing will be appreciated.

:) comment to follow - read & commented on 7 hours later :)