Wow. Super interesting to know more about Mormom religion. I did not know much about it and it's secrets. Thank you for bringing this story up in such a brilliant way. You write well and I wish you the best with this book. 5 stars

Excellent. Just started reading this and backed it immediately. Beautifully written in an easy flowing style that draws the reader in as though a friend she is talking to over coffee and being allowed to share her secret. Brave to do this and I take my hat off to you. I believe i God 100% and am a Catholic and Christian, but religion is sadly not doing itself any favours in many cases and this story goes to show just how bad it can be when followed in such a controlling and bullying way. God is good, God is Love and God is also a good parent who punishes when we do wrong. One thing He isn't is a bullying control freak and any religion teaching that way is not doing God's work. I have no idea what happens later and wouldn't spoil it for others if I did, but well done brave lady and I hope you are happy and at peace now and that you can still find it in your heart to love a God who loves you and knows just how special you are. No doubt another best seller Harper Collins will ignore. Go sell on Kindle and Lulu and it'll do you proud. HC's loss will be your gain as you'll get 70% profits. xxxxx

I am hooked. Your book is very engrossing. i have finished chapter #3 and want to read the rest of it now, but I have to wait until I get to the computer at the library, or I will use up all the gigabites on my internet. Argh! I am putting you on my WL, and will put you on my shelf as soon as I can. Sincerely, Donna Jessup and the Teleporter

Hi Stella, Came across your work completley by accident, but now i am so glad i did. Having only read the first chapter, as this is all i have time to read properly. The pitch for your story, as this is all i can work on as a means of assessing the work, filled me both with a tinge of sadness and a overwhelming sense of pride in your achievements to break away from that environment. Bravery is the word to best sum it up. I have deep respect for people who challange the authority they have been brought up in, that they have been almost brow-beaten into yielding towards. Speaking as an athiest (don't worry i'm not one of those smug athiests that everybody seems to hate) i think that more people who have been in your position should tell their stories. As it stands as a good symbol for everybody and everyday life: you should not accept your life as it is if you are not happy with it. Only you can make a difference. Anyway, those were my initial thoughts of the first chapter and your pitch as a whole, i have no real critisim or advice as like i said i haven't read enough to afford me those view points, but rest assured from what i've read alone your book has my backing and my watchlist. Keep up the good work! Tom Paradise, Volume 1 (ps sorry for any spelling mistakes, as this was written in a hurry)

Hi Stella What can I say, except I admire you very much for giving us such an insight to the way of the Mormons. I had heard such stories before, but it is better to be believed through the eyes of someone who witnessed it. One reads such horrible things about different religions and how they abuse the very people they should be protecting from evil. One only has to watch the news or read the papers to see such things as children being abused by priests. It is a sad sad world that we live in. I am however a believer in God and know that he will take revenge on all those who have abused us. I wish I could put you straight onto my shelf, but as it is I will have to oust someone from my WL and keep you there until I can get you onto my shelf. The reason being was that I was so touched by your story that I think it deserves to be published, so that the world really knows what goes on behind the mask of religion. So on my WL and six stars for now. You will make it to the ED before you know it. Brian.

Dear Stella This is a remarkable and important book, extremely well written and a brave debunking of much that goes on in the world of 'religion'. I have just finished chapter seven and am completely gripped. How lovely to have a Charlie in your life - but the chilling William who reminded me of Patrick Bergen in that scary movie, Sleeping With The Enemy - scared me to death. How you didn't jump out the car on your way back to Idaho after the wedding I will never know... It seems to take us human beings some time (some never get it) to realise that intellect (all brain, not much soul) and intelligence (love and truth) are different things. But how cleverly powerful believers take control and ruin lives, taking innocence away by claiming their secret society is better than another - how preposterous. It seems to me that, the closest thing we have to truth is that' inner voice, that instinct that transcends bluff and rhetoric, that thing we often ignore - at our peril. Been there, done that. Your book will do well. I have rated it highly and backed it. Very well done. Geoff - Paying for the Past

Stella. Thank you so much for this book – I am finding it fascinating, in an educational sense, and riveting as a story. I could hardly believe it when you joined the Mormon Church again as a teenager, after everything you had been through! I usually nit-pick my way through books, but there was no need in your case. Although it could still use a little polishing, the writing runs smoothly and is easy to read. I don’t blame you for dropping Neural Psychology and taking poetry class – the frog incident is stuck in my head now and, of course, I wasn’t there! Stella, I’ve read up to chapter four and intend to read more from time to time. This is the kind of book I like, and would certainly select it from a bookshelf at a bookstore. The only thing preventing me from reading it more intensely is that I don’t like reading online – it hurts my eyes! So, let me know when it hits the bookstores, and I’m sure it will, so I can buy a copy.

The Secret Life of a Mormon Wife. Chapters 1 to 10 I have only read 10 chapters today but, had time permitted, I would have happily gone on to read all that is downloaded. A very, very powerful insight into the life and beliefs of Mormons -and what revelations. I cannot add anything much to the detailed comments already posted, but I consider your style of writing to be such that it makes this book hugely readable. I love the humour that manages to surface here despite the darkness of the story - describing William on your wedding day as looking like the Pillsbury Dough Boy made me laugh despite my overall feeling of anger at what you were going through on what should have been the happiest day of your life. I can associate totally with humour being a way of dealing with stress and pain - don't ever lose that humour. 6 stars and will watchlist this for future backing. Janet Janet/Helen The Stranger In My Life

This is an interesting subject matter which is really well written. Your writing style is natural and very readable. You let your experiences speak for themselves. Once I started, I could not stop until I had read it all. This is really powerful and I’m sure it will stay in the mind of all who have read it. It must have taken a great deal of courage to write and I want to thank you for sharing it. Best of luck, Nicola.

I have sent a private message to Emma, thanking her for her in-depth review, and will address the issues she raises in my next edit. Until then, I wanted to clarify a few things here. I was not aware of my daughter's abuse at the hands of the church member who physically abused her until after I had stopped taking her there. Threats had been an effective deterrent. I did confront the babysitter once I found out, but naturally she denied hitting and slapping "Leigh." She did admit to "I swatted her on the butt, because she wouldn't stop screaming." Which begs the question: Why was she screaming to begin with? As for my son, I tried many times to have him switched to another class and even considered home schooling him. The situation resolved itself when the teacher was fired for striking another student forcefully enough to break his glasses. As my friendship with the professor grew, I mentioned him to my parents as someone from Huntington and asked if they had known him when he lived there.They had given permission to give him their address. In condensing the story for brevity, I had omitted that important detail. Because this is my story and not that of my parents, I deliberately omitted much of what was going on there. My father is deceased, but my mom is still living. Out of respect for her, I do not wish to discuss her personal matters. She may even have an issue with the parts I have told, but they seem essential to my story. (My mom and siblings are still unaware of my book.) Patti's parents frequently told me I was "precious." When I say they thought I was a bad influence on their daughter, it was more along the lines of typical teenage shenanigans, nothing really bad. They made it clear they still loved me as their own. When Patti passed away, it felt like losing a sister and a best friend. Thank you so much Emma for bringing these things to my attention. [QUOTE] Stella, I've read all you have uploaded. Wow. I don't know where to start. I found this to be an incredibly interesting read. I knew very little of Mormons and their beliefs and am stunned after reading this. As an atheist, religious-based books don't usually interest me. Yet yours had me hooked from the first page. You've done an incredible job with this. It's candidly told and done so in such a relaxed, conversational way that it really was a pleasure to read. The hardships you endured defy belief. The abuse you suffered throughout your marriage is absolutely shocking. Surprisingly, I occasionally felt some level of sympathy for William. He was also a victim where his despicable father was concerned, yet there comes a point where he has to be accountable for his own actions. His complete lack of compassion, care and attention where you and your children were concerned was sickening. How on earth you managed to endure that life for as long as you did, beggars belief. Some parts of this, I found hard to read. In particular, the hardships your children suffered. Not only were they experiencing abuse at home (mental, verbal and emotional, not to mention the sickening episode with the pornography), they also had to endure it from other quarters, too; Leigh with the babysitter, Joseph with the teacher, etc. I must admit, I was surprised at the mention of these incidents. You tell us about Leigh's awful treatment at the hands of the babysitter almost in passing, then swiftly move on. What happened? Perhaps you're a better person than me as I'd have ripped the bullying cow's throat out had she treated my child in this way. The same goes for Joseph's disgusting teacher. I must also say, I truly admire your ability to forgive the doctor after Sara's death. That must have taken some exceptional soul-searching. As a mother, my heart ached for you as I read about the loss of your children. You are an incredibly strong woman, Stella. Your visions/dreams sent shivers down my spine as I read, particularly the one about Katrina's birth and the premonition of the death of your son. I'm glad you had the visions of seeing your children in spirit; it must have been such a huge comfort. Orville is an absolute shit. What a disgusting, sorry excuse for a father. To be living in the lap of luxury whilst his own flesh and blood lived in poverty-- sickening. What on earth you must have gone through after realising what a dreadful mistake you'd made marrying into that hellish family! William's demands, what he expected from you as his new wife, as you drove from just being married caused my jaw to hit the floor. And the agreement with Samuel...! Bloody hell, what a horrible family! I'm so glad you got out of there and really pity other people still enduring what you did. Despite the subject matter and the horrors you suffered, you have managed to write this in an almost tongue-in-cheek style. It gives for a highly engrossing read; you've done a brilliant job. The smatterings of humour within are very well thought out and makes this stand out from your usual non-fiction stories of abuse. I really think you have a winner on your hands with this and would be very surprised if this isn't picked up in the near future. It's truly deserving and needs to be noticed. I think you've been incredibly brave writing this and am glad you have. Your story really needs to be heard. This is very well written and polished. Apart from some punctuation issues, there isn't really much I'd change. An edit would iron this out and make it ready for publication in no time at all. One thing that did jar a little for me was the over-use of exclamation marks. In my opinion, nearly all of them could be stripped away. They alter the tone somewhat and become a little irritating after a while. I think your writing would have a more powerful impact without them. Also, when you were praying after William's accusations regarding the professor, one line of your prayer sounds a bit confusing, as if a word or two is missing. Maybe have a read and see if you agree? Of course, it may just be me not getting it. I thought that a few issues could be elaborated on and some others trimmed. For example, the mention of your parents suddenly stopping attending church was mentioned but no real reason was given or explained. And how did they feel about you continuing to attend? Did you discuss this with them, etc? It just seemed a little odd to me and I'd have liked to have known more about that. Also, you mention that Patti's parents saw you as a bad example to their daughter then say you were hardly away from their home and that they often mentioned wanting to adopt you! This doesn't really make sense. As for the parts that could be trimmed, I think you've done a fantastic job with the descriptions of the mormon faith and its teachings and have included a lot of interesting information. It does, however, seem to drag on a bit in parts and I found myself skipping sections at times, wanting to get back to the main story. As I've said, though, you've done a great job explaining the history and customs, etc. They were very insightful, thank you. As I've stated, William's behaviour is awful. I did, however, agree with his opinion on one matter. I too thought it a little odd that you gave the professor your parents address. Maybe it's a US/UK thing, and you're a lot more friendlier over there, but I could just imagine my family's reaction if I gave their address to someone they'd never met and they just turned up out of the blue! I don't mean to offend you (and it goes without saying, William's reaction with the shotgun was completely wrong), just giving, as a reader, my opinion. There's not much more to say. I applaud and admire you for your brutal honesty and your ability to admit and hold your hands up to some of the mistakes you made, especially with the children and Patti's ordeal with William and the rape. Writing this must have been a very emotional project and I thank you for giving me the opportunity of reading it. You are a brilliant writer, a great mother and a very nice, very brave, human being. I wish you all the best for the future and with getting this published. I've starred this highly and will be shelving it at the next shuffle. Well done. [ENDQUOTE]

I have sent a private message to Emma, thanking her for her in-depth review, and will address the issues she raises in my next edit. Until then, I wanted to clarify a few things here. I was not aware of my daughter's abuse at the hands of the church member who physically abused her until after I had stopped taking her there. Threats had been an effective deterrent. I did confront the babysitter once I found out, but naturally she denied hitting and slapping "Leigh." She did admit to "I swatted her on the butt, because she wouldn't stop screaming." Which begs the question: Why was she screaming to begin with? As for my son, I tried many times to have him switched to another class and even considered home schooling him. The situation resolved itself when the teacher was fired for striking another student forcefully enough to break his glasses. As my friendship with the professor grew, I mentioned him to my parents as someone from Huntington and asked if they had known him when he lived there.They had given permission to give him their address. In condensing the story for brevity, I had omitted that important detail. Because this is my story and not that of my parents, I deliberately omitted much of what was going on there. My father is deceased, but my mom is still living. Out of respect for her, I do not wish to discuss her personal matters. She may even have an issue with the parts I have told, but they seem essential to my story. (My mom and siblings are still unaware of my book.) Patti's parents frequently told me I was "precious." When I say they thought I was a bad influence on their daughter, it was more along the lines of typical teenage shenanigans, nothing really bad. They made it clear they still loved me as their own. When Patti passed away, it felt like losing a sister and a best friend. Thank you so much Emma for bringing these things to my attention. [QUOTE] Stella, I've read all you have uploaded. Wow. I don't know where to start. I found this to be an incredibly interesting read. I knew very little of Mormons and their beliefs and am stunned after reading this. As an atheist, religious-based books don't usually interest me. Yet yours had me hooked from the first page. You've done an incredible job with this. It's candidly told and done so in such a relaxed, conversational way that it really was a pleasure to read. The hardships you endured defy belief. The abuse you suffered throughout your marriage is absolutely shocking. Surprisingly, I occasionally felt some level of sympathy for William. He was also a victim where his despicable father was concerned, yet there comes a point where he has to be accountable for his own actions. His complete lack of compassion, care and attention where you and your children were concerned was sickening. How on earth you managed to endure that life for as long as you did, beggars belief. Some parts of this, I found hard to read. In particular, the hardships your children suffered. Not only were they experiencing abuse at home (mental, verbal and emotional, not to mention the sickening episode with the pornography), they also had to endure it from other quarters, too; Leigh with the babysitter, Joseph with the teacher, etc. I must admit, I was surprised at the mention of these incidents. You tell us about Leigh's awful treatment at the hands of the babysitter almost in passing, then swiftly move on. What happened? Perhaps you're a better person than me as I'd have ripped the bullying cow's throat out had she treated my child in this way. The same goes for Joseph's disgusting teacher. I must also say, I truly admire your ability to forgive the doctor after Sara's death. That must have taken some exceptional soul-searching. As a mother, my heart ached for you as I read about the loss of your children. You are an incredibly strong woman, Stella. Your visions/dreams sent shivers down my spine as I read, particularly the one about Katrina's birth and the premonition of the death of your son. I'm glad you had the visions of seeing your children in spirit; it must have been such a huge comfort. Orville is an absolute shit. What a disgusting, sorry excuse for a father. To be living in the lap of luxury whilst his own flesh and blood lived in poverty-- sickening. What on earth you must have gone through after realising what a dreadful mistake you'd made marrying into that hellish family! William's demands, what he expected from you as his new wife, as you drove from just being married caused my jaw to hit the floor. And the agreement with Samuel...! Bloody hell, what a horrible family! I'm so glad you got out of there and really pity other people still enduring what you did. Despite the subject matter and the horrors you suffered, you have managed to write this in an almost tongue-in-cheek style. It gives for a highly engrossing read; you've done a brilliant job. The smatterings of humour within are very well thought out and makes this stand out from your usual non-fiction stories of abuse. I really think you have a winner on your hands with this and would be very surprised if this isn't picked up in the near future. It's truly deserving and needs to be noticed. I think you've been incredibly brave writing this and am glad you have. Your story really needs to be heard. This is very well written and polished. Apart from some punctuation issues, there isn't really much I'd change. An edit would iron this out and make it ready for publication in no time at all. One thing that did jar a little for me was the over-use of exclamation marks. In my opinion, nearly all of them could be stripped away. They alter the tone somewhat and become a little irritating after a while. I think your writing would have a more powerful impact without them. Also, when you were praying after William's accusations regarding the professor, one line of your prayer sounds a bit confusing, as if a word or two is missing. Maybe have a read and see if you agree? Of course, it may just be me not getting it. I thought that a few issues could be elaborated on and some others trimmed. For example, the mention of your parents suddenly stopping attending church was mentioned but no real reason was given or explained. And how did they feel about you continuing to attend? Did you discuss this with them, etc? It just seemed a little odd to me and I'd have liked to have known more about that. Also, you mention that Patti's parents saw you as a bad example to their daughter then say you were hardly away from their home and that they often mentioned wanting to adopt you! This doesn't really make sense. As for the parts that could be trimmed, I think you've done a fantastic job with the descriptions of the mormon faith and its teachings and have included a lot of interesting information. It does, however, seem to drag on a bit in parts and I found myself skipping sections at times, wanting to get back to the main story. As I've said, though, you've done a great job explaining the history and customs, etc. They were very insightful, thank you. As I've stated, William's behaviour is awful. I did, however, agree with his opinion on one matter. I too thought it a little odd that you gave the professor your parents address. Maybe it's a US/UK thing, and you're a lot more friendlier over there, but I could just imagine my family's reaction if I gave their address to someone they'd never met and they just turned up out of the blue! I don't mean to offend you (and it goes without saying, William's reaction with the shotgun was completely wrong), just giving, as a reader, my opinion. There's not much more to say. I applaud and admire you for your brutal honesty and your ability to admit and hold your hands up to some of the mistakes you made, especially with the children and Patti's ordeal with William and the rape. Writing this must have been a very emotional project and I thank you for giving me the opportunity of reading it. You are a brilliant writer, a great mother and a very nice, very brave, human being. I wish you all the best for the future and with getting this published. I've starred this highly and will be shelving it at the next shuffle. Well done. [ENDQUOTE]

Stella, I've read all you have uploaded. Wow. I don't know where to start. I found this to be an incredibly interesting read. I knew very little of Mormons and their beliefs and am stunned after reading this. As an atheist, religious-based books don't usually interest me. Yet yours had me hooked from the first page. You've done an incredible job with this. It's candidly told and done so in such a relaxed, conversational way that it really was a pleasure to read. The hardships you endured defy belief. The abuse you suffered throughout your marriage is absolutely shocking. Surprisingly, I occasionally felt some level of sympathy for William. He was also a victim where his despicable father was concerned, yet there comes a point where he has to be accountable for his own actions. His complete lack of compassion, care and attention where you and your children were concerned was sickening. How on earth you managed to endure that life for as long as you did, beggars belief. Some parts of this, I found hard to read. In particular, the hardships your children suffered. Not only were they experiencing abuse at home (mental, verbal and emotional, not to mention the sickening episode with the pornography), they also had to endure it from other quarters, too; Leigh with the babysitter, Joseph with the teacher, etc. I must admit, I was surprised at the mention of these incidents. You tell us about Leigh's awful treatment at the hands of the babysitter almost in passing, then swiftly move on. What happened? Perhaps you're a better person than me as I'd have ripped the bullying cow's throat out had she treated my child in this way. The same goes for Joseph's disgusting teacher. I must also say, I truly admire your ability to forgive the doctor after Sara's death. That must have taken some exceptional soul-searching. As a mother, my heart ached for you as I read about the loss of your children. You are an incredibly strong woman, Stella. Your visions/dreams sent shivers down my spine as I read, particularly the one about Katrina's birth and the premonition of the death of your son. I'm glad you had the visions of seeing your children in spirit; it must have been such a huge comfort. Orville is an absolute shit. What a disgusting, sorry excuse for a father. To be living in the lap of luxury whilst his own flesh and blood lived in poverty-- sickening. What on earth you must have gone through after realising what a dreadful mistake you'd made marrying into that hellish family! William's demands, what he expected from you as his new wife, as you drove from just being married caused my jaw to hit the floor. And the agreement with Samuel...! Bloody hell, what a horrible family! I'm so glad you got out of there and really pity other people still enduring what you did. Despite the subject matter and the horrors you suffered, you have managed to write this in an almost tongue-in-cheek style. It gives for a highly engrossing read; you've done a brilliant job. The smatterings of humour within are very well thought out and makes this stand out from your usual non-fiction stories of abuse. I really think you have a winner on your hands with this and would be very surprised if this isn't picked up in the near future. It's truly deserving and needs to be noticed. I think you've been incredibly brave writing this and am glad you have. Your story really needs to be heard. This is very well written and polished. Apart from some punctuation issues, there isn't really much I'd change. An edit would iron this out and make it ready for publication in no time at all. One thing that did jar a little for me was the over-use of exclamation marks. In my opinion, nearly all of them could be stripped away. They alter the tone somewhat and become a little irritating after a while. I think your writing would have a more powerful impact without them. Also, when you were praying after William's accusations regarding the professor, one line of your prayer sounds a bit confusing, as if a word or two is missing. Maybe have a read and see if you agree? Of course, it may just be me not getting it. I thought that a few issues could be elaborated on and some others trimmed. For example, the mention of your parents suddenly stopping attending church was mentioned but no real reason was given or explained. And how did they feel about you continuing to attend? Did you discuss this with them, etc? It just seemed a little odd to me and I'd have liked to have known more about that. Also, you mention that Patti's parents saw you as a bad example to their daughter then say you were hardly away from their home and that they often mentioned wanting to adopt you! This doesn't really make sense. As for the parts that could be trimmed, I think you've done a fantastic job with the descriptions of the mormon faith and its teachings and have included a lot of interesting information. It does, however, seem to drag on a bit in parts and I found myself skipping sections at times, wanting to get back to the main story. As I've said, though, you've done a great job explaining the history and customs, etc. They were very insightful, thank you. As I've stated, William's behaviour is awful. I did, however, agree with his opinion on one matter. I too thought it a little odd that you gave the professor your parents address. Maybe it's a US/UK thing, and you're a lot more friendlier over there, but I could just imagine my family's reaction if I gave their address to someone they'd never met and they just turned up out of the blue! I don't mean to offend you (and it goes without saying, William's reaction with the shotgun was completely wrong), just giving, as a reader, my opinion. There's not much more to say. I applaud and admire you for your brutal honesty and your ability to admit and hold your hands up to some of the mistakes you made, especially with the children and Patti's ordeal with William and the rape. Writing this must have been a very emotional project and I thank you for giving me the opportunity of reading it. You are a brilliant writer, a great mother and a very nice, very brave, human being. I wish you all the best for the future and with getting this published. I've starred this highly and will be shelving it at the next shuffle. Well done.

Stella: I was going to send this to you in a private message but maybe it needs to be posted as a comment. When I first read your book I didn't want to admit that the shocking things you have said about the church could be true. The first time I attended church was at my grandmothers house in her living room as we had no building and most of the members in the town were family and the town was small. I was very young, a baby really. We later had church over the A&P store downtown. It took many years and many bake sales before we were able to get a chapel. My grandfather was Pres. and then my uncle. When you have had this religion drilled into you for eighteen years, it is difficult to let go of it. My mother and her family were members. The men my mother and her sisters were married to joined much later in life and were not active when I was growing up. If they had married members of the church, they would have had to marry cousins. (people in Kentucky have been accused of that) Laughs and smiles for a little humor there. I taught Sunday school and was very active in the church. When the abuse began at a very young age, I had to ask myself if the church was so great how come it was not okay to drink coffee or pepsi and smoke but it was okay to beat your children and send them to school with broken teeth and bald places where the hair was pulled out. My aunts did not treat their children that way, however. When I was about ten an elder (missionary) tried to sexually abuse me. We were in a crowded car and I was forced to sit on his lap. I was damaged by that. I told no one. I do not say the things you state in your book are not true but I do think it is sad. I have to question a church or religion that holds it's women down as homemakers and producers of children and placates their wives by telling them they, as mothers, have the most important job of all, not that I disagree with that but I do disagree with the motive. I do not attend church at all. Enough of that and now to your book. It is well written and polished. If this is written in a true sincere purpose and I have no reason to doubt that, I applaud you. I like to think there are good people in the church, and I'm sure we would agree on that. I wish you well and have starred you well. Sincerely Shirley Grace

Stella: I was going to send this to you in a private message but maybe it needs to be posted as a comment. When I first read your book I didn't want to admit that the shocking things you have said about the church could be true. The first time I attended church was at my grandmothers house in her living room as we had no building and most of the members in the town were family and the town was small. I was very young, a baby really. We later had church over the A&P store downtown. It took many years and many bake sales before we were able to get a chapel. My grandfather was Pres. and then my uncle. When you have had this religion drilled into you for eighteen years, it is difficult to let go of it. My mother and her family were members. The men my mother and her sisters were married to joined much later in life and were not active when I was growing up. If they had married members of the church, they would have had to marry cousins. (people in Kentucky have been accused of that) Laughs and smiles for a little humor there. I taught Sunday school and was very active in the church. When the abuse began at a very young age, I had to ask myself if the church was so great how come it was not okay to drink coffee or pepsi and smoke but it was okay to beat your children and send them to school with broken teeth and bald places where the hair was pulled out. My aunts did not treat their children that way, however. When I was about ten an elder (missionary) tried to sexually abuse me. We were in a crowded car and I was forced to sit on his lap. I was damaged by that. I told no one. I do not say the things you state in your book are not true but I do think it is sad. I have to question a church or religion that holds it's women down as homemakers and producers of children and placates their wives by telling them they, as mothers, have the most important job of all, not that I disagree with that but I do disagree with the motive. I do not attend church at all. Enough of that and now to your book. It is well written and polished. If this is written in a true sincere purpose and I have no reason to doubt that, I applaud you. I like to think there are good people in the church, and I'm sure we would agree on that. I wish you well and have starred you well. Sincerely Shirley Grace

The Secret Life of the Mormon Wife by Stella J Rabinowitz I highly recommend reading this book. This is not an area I know much about, and appreciate the clear explanations given about the culture and religion. The level of this is perfect. in 1830 (add space ?) suffice to say ( suggest removing it) You are brave indeed to speak out about the abuse suffered, not only by yourself but by your family. I cannot imagine how your mom coped with such a horrific experience. You describe a range of traumatic childhood experiences. It is humbling in the way you do not seek sympathy. (although you deserve a lot of empathy and understanding). I cannot comprehend the exact feelings that must have arisen from such traumas. This is an excetionally well written account of what life can be like for a Mormon family. Its brutal honesty and heart wrenching accounts are heartfelt by the reader. I cannot begin to imagine the emotional and psychological cost of some of these experiences. It takes a strong person indeed, to not only survive such circumstances, but to go an and write about them. This book deserves wider readership and praise. It is written from the heart, not to extract sympathy, but to raise awareness and understanding. The contents will stay with you long after you lay this book down. A worthy contribution to the genre. I trully hope it does well. I will continue to read this at my own pace. Sheena The Popish Plot

I've read the first five chapters so far. I've found it to be very well written and edited. I didn't spot any typos or distractions. I realise this is only the beginning and the story of a life like this is going to get much worse, as we are given a taste of this from the divorce lawyer at the beginning. It was a really good touch. I like how you don't harp on with the facts, but tell us little tales that, although are only small, have great significance. Such as the frog brain scene and the way you describe boys as flavoured ice-cream rather than mentioning race or colour. You seemed so close to standing up and refusing to get married, and I felt how alone you were and unable to find that extra little bit of strength from someone. I'm sure if your mother had been there it would have been enough to steer you away. As it's complete I will get round to reading it all eventually. I will also find it a shelf space in a few weeks. I've high starred it and I look forward to reading on. Take care, Jes.x

Author Stella J. Rabinowitz, presents us with an interesting look into the Mormon culture as well as its umbelievably scary (from MPOV) practices and beliefs. Although i only read the first five chapters, i felt this book was brilliantly written with good descriptions and even a sense of humor, in spite of the seriousness of the narrative. High stars, on my WL and placed in line for the shelf. Maria The Path to Survival

Hi Stella, I enjoyed reading your book . . . and that is the complete MS. While I was very interested in the subject matter, I also wondered how you would tackle the many faceted strands of this controversial religion. I was deeply impressed with the way you handled the story-telling which was laced with many an informative paragraph about the basics of Mormonism. There was not a hint of ranting or raving, nor any sensationalism, which could have marred or distorted an objective viewpoint. Instead, your down-to-earth approach told a truthful story, but never resorted to retaliation or name-calling. You've woven your own life-story with its joys and woes into this book, and the contradictions and discrepancies seem to become more apparent when using the method of opening your private thoughts to a wider audience. I thought that the cover could be more eye-catching. If you look for Bradley Wind's thread 'Free cover', you can ask on there for one to be designed to your specifications. Some of the back-story in the beginning seems a little lengthy, with towns, schools, friends and university descriptions which may be interesting for people who know those places, but don't have much of an impact on a non-American reader. I feel that a little cutting back of this info could tighten up the story-line. I agreed with all your discussions about doctrine, and thought that your arguments were very clear and logical. The 'rod' in biblical terms is a stick with which the shepherds used to GUIDE their flocks, not beat them. I found your story extremely well balanced and moving. I've backed the book. Ame

I've read the first eight chapters of your book. I found it harrowing to read but your sense of humour also shines through which made it bearable (just). I am completely ovewhelmed by what happend to you and think that you must possess a very strong personality to have survived the experiences you went through (and I just know I haven't read the worst, yet). I think it is important for people who know about these organisations from the inside to explain them to the 'outside' world. Your writing style is suited to this kind of book and you move swiftly through some very dificult and painful passages keeping the flow and pace going.I didnt see anyting I felt should be edited excetp for (I think in chapter 2?) it might be helpful to give a brief explanation of what you mean by 'baptism for the dead'. I think I know what it means but it may need clarifying. This story resonated for me, personally, and at time was painful to read but that just shows the power of your writing and the way you are able to express the feelings you experienced. You seem to be completely devoid of self pity. Thank you very much for sharing your story. I hope it will help other people who are trapped not only in restrictive cults but in abusive relationships of every kind. You give out a message of hope and optimism. Highly starred.

Stella, I read through your first five chapters. This was a very eye-opening experience. It's always been interesting to me why the Mormon leaders keep all their rituals and ceremonies very private. After reading this, I'm thinking it might be a wise thing for them to do. The scripts in the wedding ceremony you described digressed in so many ways from the Bible and seemed to substitute God with the devil. There seem to be many inconsistencies in their beliefs. This was edited well. You are also very clear and succinct about the way you organized your work. You describe in detail each area of your life before moving on. I felt your confusion and pain in both your upbringing and throughout your college years. I think brainwashing is powerful and even though in the back of your mind, you questioned some of the ideas and rituals, and the things your husband-to-be's family were doing, you created excuses for the behavior or chose to ignore it. I think the exposure of this book is important. If it helped one person to find their way out of such a life, it would be worth it. Best wishes, Kara A Gate Called Beautiful

WOW what a start to this book. I have only read chapter one here but will read more soon. I like it so far and think its nicely written with a great flow to it. Will be interested in seeing where this is going. Very wonderful writing style here. High Stars from me and on my WL for now. Thanks for sharing this story. -Lyn Forty-Four Footprints Following Me

Stella I read all the way to chapter 30 and I appreciate your brutal honesty and openness. I hope it will cause some to think deeper than the surface and to look past closed doors to what's going on inside. Your writing is clear and understandable. I'm sorry you've suffered so much. Your life was a hard one and I will pray that all will be much better for you and your family from now on. May there be someone who's saved because you told the truth. I've never been a Mormon, but have relatives who are and I appreciate your writing. God bless you!!! Elizabeth Kathleen "If Children are Cheaper by the Dozen, Can I Get a Discount on Six?"

Poor you. I have come back to your book and read up to chapter seven. How awful your life must have been with William. I had no idea that these people behaved in such a way. I will read on, hopefully you survive which I Imagine your did. You have written this so nicely and matter-of -factly, that it is really easy to follow. I like the ice cream analogy and the fact that William looked like the pilsbury dough boy in the temple. I would have laughed out loud I'm sure. I was shocked at the idea that heaven was an exclusive club and William was your Lord. How dreadful. You tell this story well at a steady place. I willl come back and comment once I've read more.

Stella...I had such a different view of Mormons. I'd think of famous people that looked so very happy and simply thought they had found their faith just as I had, but in a different church, if you will. I never realized what beliefs they held or that they differed so drastically from my own. I ached for you. I don't think I'll ever forget that paddle that was gifted to new moms...or the meaning behind it. On one hand, at times, I felt for William, realizing he was just a by product of his own horrible upbringing...but there comes a time when we all cut the apron strings and take those things we held true, leaving behind those things we knew weren't what we want. And you, you poor thing, so far from your own family...so trapped by your dreams of being a good Mormon when everything in your existence was so darkly painful. I am so happy you found your way out...so thrilled that you found a man to love and be loved by, that is good, loyal, loving, and true. I am sure this will reach the desk and hope you are contacting publishers in the meanwhile. Six stars and a hug... Linda

Not my normal Genre this, but I am trying hard to broaden my horizon and look at as many other books as I can. I am pleasantly surprised at how muck I enjoyed your book. I think you have put a massive effort in making it feel real through the way you tell it. You have not attempted to brainwash the reader and that is clear. People get put off with that. I wish you luck with this and I hope like me you can tempt people in to reading it as I really liked this a lot. Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R) Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you? Happy New Year. Sean

I have just dipped into this, (two chapters) but it is written with great feeling and passion and because of that, it is riveting. As an English woman with a occasional attendance at church on high days and holidays (Christmas and weddings) I found the obsession with a religion (or anything else for that matter) worrying and an eye opener. I've always felt that religion (all of them) was for the suppression of women. This only confirms it. My heart goes out to you and I think your bravery in writing this is tremendous. Because I could not stop reading, I also think that this is a very well written book and for both reasons I will give you six stars and add you to my bookshelf when I have fulfilled my other offers. Andrea The de Amerley Affair

Wow. Your book is one of the very few that I have read from beginning to end. Your personal story pulled me in and wouldn't let go. Your book NEEDS to be published, however, editing and cutting will need to be done before that. The one part that sticks out in my head is the part where you are describing the jail cell. In your book, you stated that you weren't going to discuss your childhood, but then there was 1-2 pages on the jail cell. It would be scenes like this that maybe need to be cut or shortened if you want to keep it in. Overall, though, this book is a great read and spell-binding! Not only am I giving you high stars, but I am backing your book:) Jessica A Place to Call Home Writer and Editor

Stella, I read through chapter 3. I have never understood the Mormon, excuse me, LDS Church. Your historical depiction through your story is absolutely fascinating. I will return to read more. Your writing flows, and is easy to understand. I enjoyed what I read, and look fwd to reading more. I hope this gets published. Good luck, and congratulations, on gettng this in wriitng. Celine Zabel Lives Shattered: One Mother's Loss at the Hands of the Legal System

This is so interesting. I was bredfly a Mormon in my teens because I was a fan of the Osmonds (Please don't laugh :) However, it was short lived. I thought they were good people however, which I'm sure many of them are. I will be reading this with interest though. On my watch list. Top stars!!

Hello, Stella I was quite mesmerized by your writing from the off. You are a natural storyteller and you have a fascinating tale to impart. You are quite matter of fact regarding the events of your early life and I think that adds to the quality of your writing. You gives us a sense of yourself without seeking sympathy; no mean feat. I personally find stories like this fascinating and never cease to be amazed at the lengths these cultish people will go to, to hang on to members of the flock. I was brought up in convent schools and we were terrified of the nuns and priests who often acted inappropriately. Still today, I think of the effect those years had on me as I was torn between trying to please these figures that loomed large in my life. I will keep reading your book. I did not feel I was reading work from an amateur especially when you paint characters, locations and events so vividly yet with a few well-chosen words. It also takes courage to tell a story like this and I am glad you have decided to embark on this project; I think we need to learn exactly what some people go through. Best wishes and bye for now. Jane Mauret I CAN LAUGH – NOW!

Hi Stella, I have had your book on my WL for sometime. I have finally had a chance to read some of your work, and have made some notes for you. Your pitch drew me in - I too have written a memoir with similar themes of opression, escape and doomed marriage etc. I also found a lawyer who gave me a world of hope in a time where I was so empty, so I was glad to see a glimmer of hope after your pitch. May I suggest using your husband's name instead of 'him' in your short pitch? --> 'Secret Mormon rituals trapped me in an unhappy marriage. Being married to William for eternity was going to be hell' - it just gives a brief introduction to key characters. Long pitch; '...time and all eternity and gave him the power..' why not try this '..time and all eternity, giving him the power..' It just helps to ease the flow of reading. 'I could not escape from my miserable marriage.' You have already said marriage, why not try '..I could not escape my misery.' Chapter 1; I like the fact you start with diallogue, on a positive note. I think perhaps you could cut out a lot of background information which isnt relevant to the story, and replace this with more diallouge - so illustrate the story rather an explain it. You start a lot of the paragraphs with 'my parents' or 'I'. I know its difficult to avoid esp with a book of this genre. But for example 'My parents gradually stopped attending..' could be better worded 'Gradually we stopped attending..' 'Celestial (Heavenly) love..' - I don't think you need (Heavenly) there, leave it at Celestial love. I think you have a huge potential here, with a story which will shock and inform. With a little nip and tuck here and there, you're sure to have a winner. Rated highly for now, I'll be back for more. Adina Confessions of a Dervish

This book is an absolutely heart-throbbing account of a life paved in tragedy. Stella, my heart ached for you; I could not stop reading this all day. My best friend had a terrible experience with the LDS and fortunately, she was able to divorce her husband and also leave the church. I found myself thinking of her and really putting both your and her experiences into perspective having heard her account and then reading yours. Thank you for writing this. This is a very brave testament of raw facts and your emotionally driven story. The truth needs to be out there, and hopefully we can prevent others from facing the same harsh reality that you once lived. I actually found, while reading this, that I was seeking a more visceral account of your story. Often I felt perhaps you were leaving out detail that could have added more depth to the story. Really I think you should use this as a base and expand on it, it's really such a raw account of your life and you are so interesting and your story is so compelling! There is so much emotion wrapped up in your tragedies, I want more of your heart in your writing; your story is just absolutely amazing! Keep writing, you have talent and you have a story!

Powerful! Your account is well written and strong, meanding at times, but then you have 90K words. In terms of readability, and I think in concert with some of the other comments, you would be well served to cut where you can, re-write your passive verb sentences into the active verb forms where possible, and trim to 80K or less. That would make this clean, succinct, powerul, and a want-to-read, just as it already is, but a good strong edit would make it more appealing to agents, which is where you need to go next. Well done. Best. j

Hi Stella, I have revisited “Secret Life,” and once again, I so appreciate your story. It is told with a candidness that is not looking for pity but simply to set the story straight. Your honesty and ability to insightfully relate your experience makes this a very entertaining and interesting read. I found myself angered and sometimes shocked at the far extent that people’s selfishness will go. I hope by telling your story you receive healing for your hurt and that after reading this, people will be wise as foxes when they enter into any kind of “religious” contract. I gave you six stars a long time ago and they still stand! Dianna Lanser Nothing But The Blood

This is a harsh tale, well told! You lay it out well. I think your details are vivid and they enrich the telling. I'm so glad you escaped! Best of luck with this. And if you have any interest in children's literature, you are invited to check out my novel The Lost Wink. Thanks! Tod http://authonomy.com/books/40646/the-lost-wink/

I feel we have a lot of sisterhood in our situations. I married a Japanese man at 18 in 1982 and tried to become the best Japanese wife ever! I succeeded in a lot of way, but eventually I hit a wall and spiraled out of control. It was truthfully like an addiction. I left my Japanese husband- but I could not leave Japan and my indentity as a yomesan. I love the way you expose the crazy rituals and demands of the church. I was LDS for a short time in my teenage years and several relatives are "mormon." I'm Christian and thrive through the grace of God today- but I do so by reading and following His word as written in the Bible. Best wishes to you! I hope your book is published! P.S. Do you have any thoughts on Mitt Romney? Could you back him even though he is LDS?

I'm enjoying your book. I selected it because of personal connections to the subject matter. The grammar and punctuation are impeccable really. I tend to jump over my own mistakes so I can't say the same for my book. I've got plenty of goobers to clean up and I continue to work at it. I was LDS for a few years during my early-mid teens- even participating in baptism for the dead. My book (a pseronal account of life a Japanese wife), however contains none of my LDS background. It simply wasn't significant to my story of cultural addiction. I say this, because at one point my book was much longer and I had encluded the LDS part. Then, a trusted content editor told me the Mormon stuff was interesting but that it was just sort of hanging out there as a side note. I removed those sections and several others based on her advice. When I look at CMTStibbe's comments below I see he noted some rampling. I found this as well. It's such a fine line what to include and what not to include. Sometime I feel like I've omitted too much. In any case, this is a great book. I was impressed by your voice and the self-reflection. I too married young- with a voice saying "No". I just want to belong to something. I relate totally. Great work! Stacy G.

Hi Stella. Here as promised. I read the first two chapters. Not far enough to get into the meat of the story, but enough to see that your writing is certainly competent. I was a bit torn between the feeling that - 'did I really care about such detailed personal information that seemed to ramble on in the beginning' - but at the same time suspecting that I would need that much of it to really get the picture as the story unfolded. To be honest, this is not something I would read (just personal preference) so I have to confine my comments to the writing alone. In that regard, I don't see any problems (that, of course, in my amateur observation). I think your descriptions of events are clear and well presented and so far I have no questions about what you're saying. The flow is smooth - I didn't find myself going, "Huh?" anywhere. I thought the 'sequencing' as you went along was excellent (not always the case in some true life I've read here). All in all, I think you have a very interesting subject, written well, and from what I gather, one that should draw a lot of attention. Best of luck to you. See you at the desk.

The Secret Life of a Mormon Wife. By Stella Rabinowitz. I can say that this book has opened my eyes quite a lot…so to speak. I knew very little about the Mormon Church or their followers, so it comes as a surprise to learn of your past experiences. I do feel sorry for you…I think many more will do as well after reading your account. I wonder if it could have been someone else, would the marriage have been any different. To get back to the main point of reading your book…It’s a well written, brave account of your ordeal. You are to be commended for that alone and I’m sure your book will be carried out of many shops by a satisfied customer. I would have bought it purely on its title and cover…wanting to gain the wealth of experience that it offers to the reader… I would have been pleased with my purchase…I know that. Pleased to star-rate your book, Stella, BACKED!! and I wish you well with it. Kind regards, Neville. The Secrets of the Forest - The Time Zone..

Simply shocking, worse than I imagined. I support this.

Hi Stella ... Well this certainly blows a few holes in the shiny, squeaky clean people that sometimes come to our door (yes we have a temple less than half a mile from us). You really did have a terrible time in your marriage and I am surprised you survived. It is surprising how many criminal activities are committed in the name of religion (We live in a high immigrant area). I have read everything you have up and it opened my eyes, but then again, we have JW's in our family and they are not short on the bullying of women, also other religions round here. Although not religious (Brought up a methodist until sixteen, children brought up in S.A.) I can understand how beliefs are instilled in childhood, but religion, to me, has always seemed a little one sided. The only suggestion I can make is to try and remove as many 'hads' as possible. For instance, in the second chapter you use had quite frequently. What I do is to read a sentence containing 'had' ('that' can be treated the same), first with the word then without. If it does not alter the sense of the sentence 'had' can be omitted. 'Had before a word ending 'ed' can also be left out as the word is in the past tense: 'had started', 'had ended','had connected', 'had decided'. 'Had' and 'that', tend to break the flow of the story. I apologise for my pickiness. Backed and rated. regards ... Duncan.

I grew up a Mormon but I haven't been to church in almost 20 years. I find your subject very interesting and can't wait to have some time to read it. Backed and on my watchlist. Don C.

I can't believe it took me so long to have a look at this interesting book! Its very well written, I think. the language is plain and clear, and includes good, interesting details. I'm giving it some space on my shelf!

My word, Stella, what a story! Yes, I just read it (the first 4 chapters) and was blown away. Not just by the great writing and the eyes-wide-opening expose of Mormon life - something I had no prior knowledge of - but by the incredible similarities between your life and mine. Paternal abuse, check. Religious conditioning, check (I only got the Jesuits, but still). Getting into an abusive marriage, check (my 'business marriage' with Spud). Trying to get out of it, but couldn't, check. Everyone (inc folk on this site) saying 'WHY didn't you get out of it?' - check again. I LOVE this book, agree totally that, as Emmett said, that it is only 'one edit away from being published.' If I had time, I would offer to do it myself, I think it's that good. How about approaching Wiz Wharton, who pro-edited mine? Or, since she's not too well, how about my old editor from the F.T., Brenda Donovan - she'd love to get her hands on this. Six stars for a brave, no holds barred memoir. On my shelf. Joe Kovacs Rupee Millionaires

I don't have time to read any more tonight so I'll put it on my watchlist. I will however rate the book simply for your bottle at bringing this stuff to light. For some reason many Americans are fixated with religion but when a woman joins as a wife she enters hell. All religions are male dominated, created by men for men with women getting very little from it. Everyone was supposed to be equal in the eyes of the Lord but gay people aren't and neither are women. I say well done Stella. What a brave woman to stand up against fascism.

My dear friend ~ I just finished your book and I am amazed at your powerful honesty of heart. God bless you for working to bring these truths to light. As for your "spiritual experiences", we are taught in our church that God (Jehovah -- Elohim) has people in every church. Persons of honest heart who spiritually hunger for Him and knowledge of Him. I, personally, also believe that those who have been raised in different religions ... and who have never been taught about Jesus ... may have a chance to have him revealed to them at the time of their deaths or before. I truly believe that God is gracious and that His Grace covers the sins of all those who seek Him in Truth. I believe that God will reveal to those who are ignorant but hungry the things they need to know to sustain them in this life and bring them into His presence in the next life. That is why you hear of people from every religion have "spiritual experiences" like yours. You loved God ... your whole aim was to follow Him no matter the cost ... and He saw the love, that devotion and covered you with His mercy and His grace. Now ... tell THAT to the pro-Mormon arguers! Very well written. I have enjoyed it very much!

Ch. 28 another new perspective ... was William building up bank accounts all these years and really had plenty of money all along? If so, he's a true "mud man!"

Ch. 28 another new perspective ... was William building up bank accounts all these years and really had plenty of money all along? If so, he's a true "mud man!"

Ch. 27 Para starting: "The next time I came in alone..." you missed a "he" ... you write: "because doesn't even see that there is a problem ..." (should be: "because HE doesn't even see...")

Oh! BTW ... I invited thirty of my closest business partners to dinner tonight ... six sharp! Whachu mean it's 5:30 and it can't be done??? DO it!

Perhaps a mention that "Pay Lay Ale" is a Masonic declaration? Or did you know? Much of the Mormon Temple Rituals are taken directly from Freemasonry. If this is new information for you I'll gladly give you references to a couple of very interesting books about the subject. Joyce

Ch. 22 Para beginning, "I began to realize..." You use the word "judgementalness" ... don't think that word actually exists ... I belive what you really want is simply "judgement" or "condemnation". We are taught that the key to getting along with those who spitefully use us is to pray for God to change US. I think you're beginning, here, to get that message! When we pray that prayer, God either changes us (our attitudes, our behaviors, our goals) to be more pleasing to those around us or, if those around us won't be pleased no matter how we change, God changes our circumstances to bring us OUT of the situation. You are so right about religion being distorted and misused ... but I think a comment that relgion is not Christianity (you can be religious but unless you have a personal relationship -- knowledge of and at-one-ment with Jesus Christ ... you are NOT a Christian.)

Looking back, do you think that Wlliam's mother's advice (to grow a shell) was one reason William was the way he was? Is it possible he DID love you but had had the stuffing knocked out of him so often as a child that he didn't DARE show it ... or even feel it? Hmmmm. Joyce

Love that "woman on a pedestal to look up her skirt" bit! "A man is more inclined to nurture a relationship, when there only one "one and only". Need an "IS" in there: "A man is more inclined to nurture a relationship when there IS only one 'one and only'." (Comma not needed.) Joyce ~ Slave to Grace

Ch. 14 Para starting, "So, I took a piece of paper ..." you write: "I SAT it on the nightstand..." Should be "set". Past tense of set (to place) is set. Joyce

Ch. 13 Just a general observation ... I am spacially challenged and found your description of the litte house you bought confusing. It may just be me, I'm not sure. Since I AM spacially challenged I can't really comment on what you could do or even if you NEED to do something to make it clearer. ... is this my left or right hand???

secrets of the temple, well there you are, i found this an interesting piece, i will rate it well, i read the first four chapters, which is my usual, and then skimmed over more chapters, it struck me that i was presented with a picture of an idealistic young woman who really wasn't ready to make big decisions, born into and accepting a LDS world that insisted she make decisions, especially a decision to give up all her decision making responsibilities to her husband, i think the author by recalling the events leading up to her wedding effectively allows us to see how a religious system (in this case a patriarichal one) subtlely ensnares unknowing members before they are ready to make mature commitment, there is much more to be had here, someitmes life gives us great plot lines, best wishes

Ch. 12 Para beginning: "...at times I understood William was doing..." you write, "...he was a simply a product ..." obviously your first article escaped your eagle eye during editing. I am really enjoying reading ... savoring ... your style. Your wording is excellent and your phrasing and timing are impeccable. Can't wait for the next "installment!" Joyce ~ Slave to Grace

The more I read the more I realize that ... yes. William was a tyrant and immature and self-centered and ... and... and ... but there is something else going on under the main story and THAT, dear ones, is the tyranny William himself was subjected to by Orville. Orville worked William from dawn to dusk, Orville was the one who told William he couldn't stay with his wife and newborn, fatally ill daughter, Orville exploited William and didn't pay him for his work, Orville orchestrated the moves in which Stella needed to move a piece at a time in a tiny car instead of having the use of a farm truck for one single trip, Orville refused to pay utilities he had taken responsiblity for ... Orville, Orville, Orville! This is not to detract from the pain and the main story. God knows Stella suffered terribly under this cruel and unfeeling system ...but the fact that William was so subjugated to his father also needs to be recognized. The immaturity, cruelty and psychopathology William demonstrated was what he had learned at his father's knee all the years he was growing up. Stella ~ God bless you for bringing this story to light. People need to know what this cult is really like. I honor your for your bravery and honesty. Joyce ~ Slave to Grace

Ch. 8 ~~ This is such an emotional roller-coaster! Down, down down! and then you get a nice little home to live in. Up up. and then your anniversary is ignored by your husband. Down! Excellent work! Joyce

Ch. 7 Didn't find any problems and I am so glad you posted the rest of this fine work! I'm glad you've found your way out of this horrendous situation and hope you have found peace. This book is definitely a winner in my eyes and there isn't any way I could stop reading until I've consumed it all! Joyce ~ Slave to Grace

As a former mormon myself (though I left the church just six years ago), I understand your previous reluctance to write something like this. It has only been recently that I felt comfortable even saying my opinions of the church out loud. I'm certain you've heard the old saying (in the church) that apostates can leave the church but they can't leave it alone. I was determined not to become one of those kinds of apostates. Then one day, I realized that I harbored a lot of pain and emotional scarring due to being raised in the church and the more I refused to discuss it, the more bitter I was becoming. It was a liberating moment for me. I now tell people that the reason I speak out against the church is because it brainwashes its members and fosters a community of oppression and abuse. I have told my family (all of whom are still devout Mormons) that if I die, they are never going to raise my daughter. I say this not because I don't love them - I do - but because it would be a shame for my daughter's sweet spirit and natural inquisitiveness to be snuffed out by a religion who believes a woman's only place is in the home. Thank you for writing this. I hope you reach a wide readership. It is important that people understand that, no matter how hard the church tries to portray an image of being just like everyone else, they are NOT. And that difference is not a good thing. In fact, it is an awful, horrifying difference.

As a former mormon myself (though I left the church just six years ago), I understand your previous reluctance to write something like this. It has only been recently that I felt comfortable even saying my opinions of the church out loud. I'm certain you've heard the old saying (in the church) that apostates can leave the church but they can't leave it alone. I was determined not to become one of those kinds of apostates. Then one day, I realized that I harbored a lot of pain and emotional scarring due to being raised in the church and the more I refused to discuss it, the more bitter I was becoming. It was a liberating moment for me. I now tell people that the reason I speak out against the church is because it brainwashes its members and fosters a community of oppression and abuse. I have told my family (all of whom are still devout Mormons) that if I die, they are never going to raise my daughter. I say this not because I don't love them - I do - but because it would be a shame for my daughter's sweet spirit and natural inquisitiveness to be snuffed out by a religion who believes a woman's only place is in the home. Thank you for writing this. I hope you reach a wide readership. It is important that people understand that, no matter how hard the church tries to portray an image of being just like everyone else, they are NOT. And that difference is not a good thing. In fact, it is an awful, horrifying difference.

A book is well written when one can forget about the writing and pay full attention to the story. This is such a book and the story is gripping. I know enough about the Mormons to get the general picture, but this is a real insider look into the sect and, as such, a bridge of understanding for the uninitiated. I recommend it highly. Iva P. Fame and Infamy

I encourage you to post your memoir. It would be of tremendous interest to many. You are my target audience: those who have been impacted by the doctrines of this “religion,” and those who will find themselves impacted in the future – if they are not warned. Our voices need to be heard loud and clear. It would be difficult for me to deny having an “axe to grind.” But my ex was merely the catalyst. Had he treated me as your current husband does, I might never have questioned the veracity of the church’s doctrines. In some ways, I owe my ex-husband a debt of gratitude for opening my eyes to the truth about the LDS church. There is much more to my story than what would fit in one book. After you have read more, particularly Chapters 3, 25, and 29, I would love to discuss these issues with you. We can do it on or offsite – whichever you are more comfortable with. I am a truth seeker. I can tell you unequivocally that a sincere search for truth will lead out of the LDS church. If that is “grinding an axe,” then mine has a very sharp edge. [QUOTE] I too have written a book on this very subject but I wrote it for my children and have never shared it with another soul (except my sister who cried her eyes out). I was married to an abusive man in the temple too, he used dogma and twisted the doctrine to meet his own abusive needs.... BUT I have also experienced the flipside of the coin at how WONDEFUL and LIBERATING it can be to be a "mormon" wife when the man actually lives by the doctrines correctly. I remarried (in the same faith) and have never been so happy in my life. No matter what faith people belong to, there will be bad apples... and people will interperet the "doctrine" however they see fit. In fact, if you quote the article of faith 11 "We claim the aprivilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own cconscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may" It's important to note, "dictates of our own cconscience". Your book is YOUR expeience, and I am certainly not discounting it... but before readers put too much stock in it, consider this: Is the half glass full or half empty? Certainly a great read if you want to know what hell it can be to be a mormon wife when your husband is a WICKED man. But when your husband is a righteous man, a temple marriage is heavenly, beautiful and rewarding :) In your case, after reading bits of your story (which is so sad, so sorry u went thru that) I can't help but feel you have an axe to grind... perhaps blaming the "church" for your woes, when really, it was just a sick man who misunderstood the very basic principal of love and companionship. The same could be saif of any faith, any culture. I think I am qualified to speak having been through a very similar situation. Perhaps I should post my book here in response so people can see the flip side... the good AND the bad. It is only fair to look at things objectively. I wish you th very best. [ENDQUOTE]

I too have written a book on this very subject but I wrote it for my children and have never shared it with another soul (except my sister who cried her eyes out). I was married to an abusive man in the temple too, he used dogma and twisted the doctrine to meet his own abusive needs.... BUT I have also experienced the flipside of the coin at how WONDEFUL and LIBERATING it can be to be a "mormon" wife when the man actually lives by the doctrines correctly. I remarried (in the same faith) and have never been so happy in my life. No matter what faith people belong to, there will be bad apples... and people will interperet the "doctrine" however they see fit. In fact, if you quote the article of faith 11 "We claim the aprivilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own cconscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may" It's important to note, "dictates of our own cconscience". Your book is YOUR expeience, and I am certainly not discounting it... but before readers put too much stock in it, consider this: Is the half glass full or half empty? Certainly a great read if you want to know what hell it can be to be a mormon wife when your husband is a WICKED man. But when your husband is a righteous man, a temple marriage is heavenly, beautiful and rewarding :) In your case, after reading bits of your story (which is so sad, so sorry u went thru that) I can't help but feel you have an axe to grind... perhaps blaming the "church" for your woes, when really, it was just a sick man who misunderstood the very basic principal of love and companionship. The same could be saif of any faith, any culture. I think I am qualified to speak having been through a very similar situation. Perhaps I should post my book here in response so people can see the flip side... the good AND the bad. It is only fair to look at things objectively. I wish you th very best.

LOVED chapter 12. How could I have missed it? There's so much faith and God in this chapter, apart from any church, because of the situations you found yourself in. The experiences and revelations of the divine...the inner hearing of the voice of God...just speechless, sitting here in Kentucky reading this. These kinds of revelatory life experiences are the real sermons, in my opinion. God bless you, sweetie! Georgia

The Secret Life of a Morman Wife / Stella J. Rabinowitz I read this entire book today. Ironic it is, I can't say I 'enjoyed' the story at all times, whilst I certainly did like the writing. As some memoir based 'true-life' stories will go, I found the author's depiction of the Morman church to be in complete concurrence of my own previous belief that it is an evil and disgusting institution, filled with falseness, powermongers and hatred. The author does a good job of explaining details. Sometimes, I must admit, I felt as if she was 'going on and on' to make points / lend emphasis to such. Some of the story could have been shortened I believe, essentially, edited to emit some of the rambling. This is not to say that it is not a good story...it is! The writing was clean from the standpoint of being readable. Very little was suspect in punctuality. My previous statement about rambling may be such that if I had been the one who endured this life I might ramble a bit about it too when I finally write it all down. The author is a good writer, one able to convey thought quite well. There are elements of sarcasm at times that were actually humerous, given the fact that they seem to express a comfort level felt by the writer at the time of this writing, as opposed to the thoughts she portrays in thought about earlier times. During those pages I got the idea she was constantly being taken back to the times when these occurrences took place and it somehow stimulated those old feelings again. THAT is good writing I guess because I read an entire book I planned to only skim through. Go figure. The author tells an in-depth story about her life as the wife of a selfish, cult-associated individual (I've always felt the religion a cult) His sexual tendencies, mannerisms, failure to have genuine concern for his family or his wife reinforce an impression I've always had about this religion as a whole. Reading the parts whereas the author expresses her faith / spirtual committment to her husband made me angry. (The childbirths, the banishing of her friend Patti from her home after her husband attempts to seduce her, etc,..) I'm one of those ones who always wonders why women take from their men what they do to bebing with though. It seemed to me the author, through her own depiction in parts, gave me reason to believe she could / should have left this guy years earlier. (The Playboys and stuff) I mean, just damn, how many times can a person tell a lie and have it conveniently 'back-burnered' by a blind faith in some lie that it will change. NOw, for me to be asking these things means the story was conveyed correctly. I'm angry at the author in a sense that she didn;t leave earlier, or during the 'ceremony' whereas she noticed so many things wrong to begin with. I'm sure she too, has spent many thousands of hours being mad at herself. The story got to me and I have to think that is the intention of it. That said, mission accomplished. Obviously, being a memoir narrative in FP, the only POV is the author. In this regard I felt she did quite well in keeping down the # of times 'I' appears. The flow was quite good, kept in 'story' form a majority of the time and there was switching of timeframes to keep a pace that was interesting. All in all, this is a riveting story, told from the heart. The writing is good. There were times (forgiving Dr. S) when I thought I saw how the author was weak, or 'so' into blind faith, whatever, that I see how she allowed herself to remain in this environment for so long. From a storytelling standpoint, she's done that quite well or I wouldn't be feeling as passionate about it as I am right now. I went through it all in this story. I sympthosized with this lady, I was angry (for), not at her, emotional and felt disgust. Basically, I went on the entire ride this story was intended to take the reader on. I read a few chapters of this book to teen in the house, who appeared to be interested to want to read it on her own. (She has her own Authonomy account) Being a young lady (college) who is of faith, I thought it interesting to hear her response to the more critical aspects of the writing on the Mormon church. We live in one of those areas where they send out their door-knockers who show up unannounced at the worst possible times expecting you to stop what you are doing and hear their testimonies. I thought a 'testimony' like this one from the author might serve well to provide her an 'insurance policy' against ever taking time to hear what those radical idiots have to say. I certainly do wish my best to / for the author. You took me on a literary trip today my friend and I appreciate your writing. 5 stars for this good work. I believe it is one pro-edit away from publishing. E M Delaney

The Secret Life of a Morman Wife / Stella J. Rabinowitz I read this entire book today. Ironic it is, I can't say I 'enjoyed' the story at all times, whilst I certainly did like the writing. As some memoir based 'true-life' stories will go, I found the author's depiction of the Morman church to be in complete concurrence of my own previous belief that it is an evil and disgusting institution, filled with falseness, powermongers and hatred. The author does a good job of explaining details. Sometimes, I must admit, I felt as if she was 'going on and on' to make points / lend emphasis to such. Some of the story could have been shortened I believe, essentially, edited to emit some of the rambling. This is not to say that it is not a good story...it is! The writing was clean from the standpoint of being readable. Very little was suspect in punctuality. My previous statement about rambling may be such that if I had been the one who endured this life I might ramble a bit about it too when I finally write it all down. The author is a good writer, one able to convey thought quite well. There are elements of sarcasm at times that were actually humerous, given the fact that they seem to express a comfort level felt by the writer at the time of this writing, as opposed to the thoughts she portrays in thought about earlier times. During those pages I got the idea she was constantly being taken back to the times when these occurrences took place and it somehow stimulated those old feelings again. THAT is good writing I guess because I read an entire book I planned to only skim through. Go figure. The author tells an in-depth story about her life as the wife of a selfish, cult-associated individual (I've always felt the religion a cult) His sexual tendencies, mannerisms, failure to have genuine concern for his family or his wife reinforce an impression I've always had about this religion as a whole. Reading the parts whereas the author expresses her faith / spirtual committment to her husband made me angry. (The childbirths, the banishing of her friend Patti from her home after her husband attempts to seduce her, etc,..) I'm one of those ones who always wonders why women take from their men what they do to bebing with though. It seemed to me the author, through her own depiction in parts, gave me reason to believe she could / should have left this guy years earlier. (The Playboys and stuff) I mean, just damn, how many times can a person tell a lie and have it conveniently 'back-burnered' by a blind faith in some lie that it will change. NOw, for me to be asking these things means the story was conveyed correctly. I'm angry at the author in a sense that she didn;t leave earlier, or during the 'ceremony' whereas she noticed so many things wrong to begin with. I'm sure she too, has spent many thousands of hours being mad at herself. The story got to me and I have to think that is the intention of it. That said, mission accomplished. Obviously, being a memoir narrative in FP, the only POV is the author. In this regard I felt she did quite well in keeping down the # of times 'I' appears. The flow was quite good, kept in 'story' form a majority of the time and there was switching of timeframes to keep a pace that was interesting. All in all, this is a riveting story, told from the heart. The writing is good. There were times (forgiving Dr. S) when I thought I saw how the author was weak, or 'so' into blind faith, whatever, that I see how she allowed herself to remain in this environment for so long. From a storytelling standpoint, she's done that quite well or I wouldn't be feeling as passionate about it as I am right now. I went through it all in this story. I sympthosized with this lady, I was angry (for), not at her, emotional and felt disgust. Basically, I went on the entire ride this story was intended to take the reader on. I read a few chapters of this book to teen in the house, who appeared to be interested to want to read it on her own. (She has her own Authonomy account) Being a young lady (college) who is of faith, I thought it interesting to hear her response to the more critical aspects of the writing on the Mormon church. We live in one of those areas where they send out their door-knockers who show up unannounced at the worst possible times expecting you to stop what you are doing and hear their testimonies. I thought a 'testimony' like this one from the author might serve well to provide her an 'insurance policy' against ever taking time to hear what those radical idiots have to say. I certainly do wish my best to / for the author. You took me on a literary trip today my friend and I appreciate your writing. 5 stars for this good work. I believe it is one pro-edit away from publishing. E M Delaney

I finished everything you have written up here and now I'm googling "Spaulding", and "inside a Mormon Temple." This is a fascinating scary look into what can happen when one sex tries to have total power over another, and you're right, Mysogynist men would be attracted to such a life. So glad you are out of that lifestyle. Georgia The Woman From E.A.R.L.

I believe I've backed this book before, Stella, but it is so good it deserves a second backing! I can never understand how religion can take such control of some people. But there, everyone is different. I can only admire your strength of will and courage in getting free from some0one who deosn't treat you with the love and respect you deserve. Good for you. Book backed and on w/l again. Kate Grimes -LIZZIE - CUPPA TALES - TALES OF WILLOW GREEN - ANNIE

Dear Stella I have now finished reading your book. It has been an eye-opening experience which you were brave to share. We need to know that such cruelty exists, and that we can escape from it. Thank you. Fran Macilvey, "Trapped" :-)

I've finished it all and am really glad to have read this. You have certainly opened my eyes to the true nature of the Mormon church. Good luck with finding a publisher for this.

I just finished the 2nd chapter. I'm shocked how much of this seems to ring true.

This story is compelling and I read to chapter seven. The thing I found most amazing is why a young woman would put up with such ridiculous treatment - but its hard to see the reality of a situation when you're in it and people are telling you thats your place. I see your faith was the most important thing to you and that's what kept you there, with William. The marriage ceremony and what preceeded it was fascinating??? !!!! This is a valuable insight into how women are subjugated. I think you are a brave person to write this. It gives an understanding the LDS Church and some of the ridiculously outdated ways of keeping women in a place where they are not valued, or even worth listening to. well written, the story flows nicely and yours is a story that should be told. I'm so happy that you have escaped the shackles of such a miserable existence. 6* Karen 19 The Way Things Are

The Secret Life of a Mormon Wife - by Stella Rabinowitz I have never had any Mormon friends and know little of the practice of this religion. Except for the occasional visits to my door with leaflets and bibles, I have no personal knowledge of Mormon. This book is well written and gripping in detail. P Alan Davis The Red Poppy Raindancer

HI Stella, This is a facinating story. I know something about Mormonism because my next-door-neighbor in the little village I live in (In Germany) is also a Mormon. He also speaks great Englsih and we are good friends now. His situation is similar to yours: he became disillusioned with LDS theology and has embraced Biblical Christianity, however, his wife doesn't want to leave the LDS church. This has been his delimna for years. I would certainly reccomend you to contact him if you wish concerning your book. Are you also familiar with the TV show "Heart of the Matter" with Shawn McCraney, also a former Mormon. Check out his webpage, it's great! http://www.hotm.tv/ You story also reminds me a bit of the book, "Under The Banner Of Heaven" by Jon Krakauer. Which concerns true-story fundamentalist Mormon murders. Also a great book. I wanted to back your book as a bit of support. All the best and blessings to you and with your ministry of helping other Mormons who may be caught in their situations that there is an alternative to choose. Kirk (Munich) "How to Steal a Lion"

Just finished it! Wow! A super read!

An absolutely fantastic book. I've read up to chapter 9 and am still reading. Narrated in a clear, simple, unintrusive voice. A gripping tale that deserves a wide audience. Very best of luck with it and I am only so sorry that you had to endure such hardships, sadness and abuse in order to write this book. Here's to a very courageous lady and a very talented author.

Dear Stella Is it my imagination, or did something change with your story? I suspect that you have uploaded a "new, improved" version. If you have done comprehensive revisions I can only say that the resulting read is totally gripping, and a total revelation to me. I have just read chapters three and four, having previously read chapters one and two. If I had the time I would read on. Your writing is fresh, clean and difficult to put aside and what you write about is appalling, weirdly absurd and funny all at once. I am impressed that a young woman should so deftly expose the hypocrisies of a "religion" which has everything to do with control and so little to do with love. I am saddened that you were stuck, unable to leave and forced to ignore your own inner wisdom for so long. Thank you for bringing your story to a wider public. It deserves to be recognised, understood and published. Six stars and on my WL for now. I will shelve it as soon as I can. Fran Macilvey, "Trapped"

Hi again Stella, Finished through chapter 21. Entire book well written. Loved your wit and humor in places. Cried when you lost the last baby. The fire at the camp ground was unbelievable, all because you questioned William in front of someone. And then he tried to pretend he didn't do it to the park ranger. Pride is the downfall of most. What deceitful people you had to live with. Orville's one sick puppy making his children and grands live in poverty while he lives in luxury. UGH! All about control. And your husband didn't have the nerve to stand up to him so soothed his soul by engrossing himself in porn. So glad you're out of that mess dear. Hope this book gets published because it would help so many women, not just those in the Mormon faith. So many other women are living like this. It would help them also. Hope you and your children have found peace and happiness! ~Kady Shakespeare's Pink Cadillac

Stella, I'm on Chapter Nine and thinking "Wow, I know legalistic narcissistic church men just like him and they're not Mormon." But what was really an eye-opener was the marriage at the temple in Salt Lake. I've stood outside that place thinking it was beautiful, but knowing what goes on inside in the name of God is so sad, making it ugly. While I was feeling so sorry for you and so angry at William, I also felt sorry for William finally when during the birth of the baby that died, he told you what his father had said to him. His father was a devil. But then probably so was his father before him and the curse lives on. You told this story in such a conversational tone, I felt as though I was sitting at the kitchen table with you talking over coffee. How horrid women and children have to live with this type of behavior. I hope this book gets published for the world to see. It would be a great gift for a young girl contemplating marrying into the Mormon faith. There were so many times during reading I wanted to say, "RUN!" Starring and backing. Good luck with this manuscript. ~Kady Colter Shakespeare's Pink Cadillac

The first chapter needs to be rewritten. Its much choppier then the rest. The writing further in is good and the story is compelling, the sort of book people read to feed their sense of self rightious drama. THe good news is that there is certainly a market for it. Your story reminds me of the many psycotic religions in the world and how dangerous they each are. You obviously have some history with the LDS church and this seems to be resonably accurate. I live in Provo and know some Mormons like this. I also know some (okay many) bornagains and muslims like this, Im sure there are babtists and catholics with similar stories. On The other side of the coin, I know some very healthy Mormons and bornagains. Im sure that applies to other religions too. It doesnt seem to me to be so much the religion, but rather the willingness of malicious and stupid people to use religion, Any religion, to abuse each other. No I am not mormon, nor bornagain, nor any man made religion.

I LOVE your short pitch! Shall have a read of this over the coming week. Cariad.

Stella, I finished the rest of your posting this morning and was so bummed when I found out that I missed the opportunity to read the completed story. Well, I guess I'll have buy the book when it's published. And I definitely would buy it. Like I commented before, you are so honest and your writing is heartfelt and sincere. That is very evident. I feel I have learned so much by what you have written and now I understand why a man I heard on the radio once blasted a Mormon for claiming they were a Jesus follower. There's obviously a big difference. Once again, thank you for sharing your experience. I wish I had another six stars to give you. But I will promise to back your book soon. Sincerely, Dianna Lanser Nothing But The Blood

Stella, Thank you for sharing your experience in the Mormon Church. I appreciate your honesty and the clear way that you record your memories. I was totally enthralled by the first three chapters of your book and found it hard to put down. My husband was born in Utah under the shadow of the Mormon influence. (His very young parents at the time had moved from Michigan to help build up a Christian church in Ogden.) The newly-weds probably had no idea what kind of deception and duress they were going up against. I hope your experience has not left you totally disgusted and disillusioned with the Creator God. I will read more to find out what happens. Six Stars! Dianna Lanser Nothing But The Blood

Hello Stella, OH MY GOODNESS...I couldn't get enough of your book. Im so very horrified and mortified of what you endured, I felt so grieved for you. As a Christian woman, wife, mother, etc I'm astonished at your perseverance, your patience, especially, your tolerance. My faith is of utmost importance to me and the honour, worth, substance of a women is undoubtedly precious, equal, and worthy beside any man. We are equal in the site of God. When I read stories like yours where men abuse, misuse and rape the essence of truth, to twist it for their own pleasure, desires, and wants, I find myself getting so very angry. I salute you for writing this story, continue to write on, to share with others your experience, so that those whom are living your life at the moment may find hope and strength to discover that this is not the life intended for any women to live. :O) Salwa. http://www.authonomy.com/books/38542/losing-me/ http://www.authonomy.com/books/38889/she-ir-chambre-poets-room/

I have just finished Chapter 5 and am intrigued and worried ... worried that Chapter 6 is going to be my last chance to read in this book! I have been a student of the cults my whole life and believe this would be a wonderful book to use as a gift to someone considering the LDS for a church-home. Your communication and writing style is fast-paced without short-changing the details. Your account of the Temple ceremonies is thorough and, unlike another commenter here, have little doubt that, with few exceptions, whoever became your husband, you would have suffered many similar cruelties ... because in whatever situation you are power DOES corrupt and absolute power (such as that given to Mormon husbands by the church even to the granting or withholding of eternal life) ALWAYS corrupts absolutely. You've got a best-seller here ... and I hope you find the loving Jesus that really does exist outside the LDS! Joyce ~ Slave to Grace

This is really well written - I love the disclaimer at the beginning - and anyone who can make a misery memoir funny has to do well. I don't back incomplete - endings are so much harder to do well than beginnings - but I wish you lots of luck with it. Authonomy seems fairly heavily weighted towards fiction, particularly fantasy,so I doubt you'll do as well as you deserve, but if it goes on as well as it begins I'm sure a more specialist publisher will snap it up.

Hi Stella, This recent upload is so much better than the version I read months ago and that was not too shabby to start off with. I find your story carries much more weight now that you've cut out some of the flippant remarks whilst retaining the humour. The removal of many of the previously ever present exclamation parts has really made a difference to the narrative voice. I feel I can identify so much more with the narrator by some of the statements being painful or sad without there being a rather forced light-hearted tone or an attempt to make a joke. The humour, however, is still present in barrels and makes a difficult subject approachable to many. I applaud your decision to re-upload your work and look forward to seeing how you have revised further chapters. All the best.

The Secret Life of a Mormon Wife is a dynamite read. It captures the essence of the Mormon Church and its followers. I gripped my seat for this fast ride, knowing that I would read all chapters uploaded. It’s frightening and educational at the same time. An educated woman from an ‘explosive’ background—cowering from one moment to the next—builds a feeling of dread. With a mother and siblings suffering under the same yoke it is easy to understand the pain of a controlling father, how devastating this can be and the consequences of such damage. I was relieved briefly when Charlie arrived on the scene; it gives a breather up until the enigmatic and narcissistic William. The marriage proposal is so distant, detached even, I wanted to scream. I see this similar to Orville’s feelings towards Myrtle and cringe in response. But perhaps this is where the example of abuse comes in. Like father—like son. Myrtle, being the epitome of modesty and humility, is oppressed and surely broken inside. Yet she does not show it, she cannot. It is her role and she plays it so well. Meanwhile, her husband revels in his power. William will likely expect this from his own wife. So many red flags are dotted through these opening chapters, it is hard to settle—to hope that something different will happen. And that’s the hook. It keeps the pages turning! The washing and anointing ceremony reminded me of the Prodigal Son in the bible, his homecoming with a robe and a ring. Only this wasn’t a happy homecoming, and the new name given was reminiscent of the white stones and new names Christians are given ‘known only to him who receives it’ (Revelation 2:17). The handshakes, penalties and the voice screaming in her head to run nearly had me unglued, notwithstanding the terror I felt of the entire marriage ceremony. Goodness knows what you went through! But I was thrilled you questioned every step even then, it was so brave. Chapter 4 gave me the chills. Sit ups and any type of abdominal routine will hardly cure slight scoliosis or bring forth a better posture. But a quick leap out of the open window of a Lincoln Town car might have been really smart here. And as for a nest of disciples, you have to hand it to Myrtle the Fertile Turtle. Eleven is quite a clutch. But the intimacy was miserable, foul and without love. How heart-breaking. The lost letters were warmer than this selfish man and the abuse escalates in Chapter 5 to screaming level. The writing is smooth and beautifully crafted. I gave this book high stars because of its intensity and the author’s heroism and determination to bring out the 'psychological captivitiy' she suffered. Very well done. Claire ~ Chasing Pharaohs.

Fundamentalist Christianity is also enticing to the Narcissistic male personality type. Thanks for the informative read. Finished Chapter 5 and it's now almost 1 AM! I liked this sentence: "In West Virginia, you don't have to look far off into the distance to see something beautiful. It's right in front of you." Well of course I liked it! Good luck on your story. Blessings, Georgia

Read through chapter 3 and will probably read all you've put up here. I have learned a lot. Very well written. What can I say about the considerable pain you've been through? So glad you are out of all that. Enjoy the rest of your life in the light of freedom. So glad you found Led Zeppelin again! Highly starred, my dear! Georgia The Woman From E.A.R.L.

Hi Stella...don't know if I can give a proper, long explanation in a few sentences as to why, and how REALLY why I like your book, and appreciate all you've been through. I've known people in the LDS...sadly, so many trapped within its deceptions, secrets...and most don't know its history. blessings, jim

wow... what a story... I have a brother and all his 6 children who were converted to Mormonism... they left the state of Maine to move to Utah (the land of milk and honey so he tells me....). The children have all married into the Mormon faith... my brother has moved up and is now a bishop and continues to rise... I pray he sees the deceptions of this religion and turns back to his roots... thank you for writing your experiences... and may God bless you ....

Hi, Stella, I read your work (the whole thing!) after seeing your posting in the "What Is Your Book About" thread. The way you described your book really drew me in, and I read the whole thing, so clearly you kept me engrossed. I live in western Washington and have lived in southern Idaho (Mountain Home) and eastern Washington, so I've known many, many LDS families. It is often difficult for me to reconcile the books I've read by "recovering" Mormons with the kind, loving families in my community. One question on my mind after reading yours is this: how much did LDS philosophy have to do with Orville's and William's personalities and your unhappiness? My sister-in-law grew up on a farm and moved irrigation pipe at dawn all her life. That's more of a farm thing than an LDS thing. I guess what I really wished for was more detail about the actual behavior of the two men. In many instances, I felt - to my surprise - a bit of sympathy for William because he was truly a victim of his father's abuse. When you brought issues to his attention he seemed able to understand, though not change, his shortcomings. I liked reading those cases because they helped me see William as a multi-dimensional person. I think readers would be very interested in more details about his parents. Your writing is honest and straightforward. Couple of technical items: You refer to Lara as Leslie in the paragraph about her dress. You mention a grocery isle; that should be aisle. I got so engrossed that I didn't notice much else. Best wishes to you! I'll keep this on my WL so I can support you when you get closer to the desk! ~AudreyB

Stella, you have a gripping story here, with lots of human and personal interest. You also write very well and I feel that your recollection is razor sharp. What I feel is that some of the narrative could be shortened so that you select out those circumstances that most affected you and use them to illustrate your predicament, rather than telling us everything that happened. You start out doing that very well, recounting your conversation with the lawyer, which immediately pulls the reader in, but as the story continues, I feel that the power of your writing gets slightly lost in the detail. Sometimes, we need to reduce, so that our narrative can speak clearly. There is power in your story and in the way you tell it, so find the nuggets. All the best with this. On my WL and highly rated. Fran Macilvey, Trapped

Wow.....chills.......good for you!!!! Long story which would tell you what I mean by all of that. On my WL for now, will shelf your book based on the first two lines that I read alone - on your profile. NICE blessings, jim

What I got from the very first paragraph was that your MC, you, is a nice and pleasant person. I got all of this from your voice. Your writing is very soft and soothing to read. Can’t explain it but that’s how the words seem to appear. You might want to state briefly in the beginning how old you are at the time. When I read the part that Williams invited her to stay with his parents and sleep with his sister, I started wondering how old she, oops . . . your were. But I assume mid-twenties by you saying you felt connected with Karen. Cool. You mention you are going to BYU. Good school. “ . . . realize you simply meant the dirt from the bottom of your muddy shoes.” LOL. I smiled when you agreed to marry him. Yes, I am a dude. Dudes can get emotional sometimes, too. “Two months” Girl, are you crazy?!! :) Loved when you said ‘I want this one.’ Great moment. It brought the kid out of you and it REALLY showed when I read it. Superb! You and William come off as genuinely fine people. You are the people that I wish more people or couples were like. I like in the chap that you don’t overdo things. You keep things simple and real. It’s very, very refreshing to read and makes the writing flow and easy to read. I laughed and smiled at the end. You are a momma’s girl. Me, too. . . . kind of. We all are I think. I LOVED this. I don’t understand why this isn’t in the top 30. Your story of your life is something we can all relate to. We don’t even have to have gone through getting married. We still understand how it works and relationships. 6 stars. But for some reason I saw that I had already given you six stars. I’m pretty sure I haven’t read this story yet. I’ve been here a month and I would have remembered. But I can’t. So . . . I don’t know why there is 6 stars already given to you. :/ Weird. Anyway. I can’t back you now because I want to give my shelfy’s a little more time. But sometime in the near future I’ll give you book some help. WOW. great read. I am so glad I spotted your book.

I've read a couple books dealing with this before your book but that makes it no less harrowing and fascinating. You write this with a deep emotion and as a reader, I felt it. It's a strange and mystertious world and bringing it to light must be hard. I couldn't stop reading this. Good luck to you, in all you do. Missy (I hope to back this one day but right now I'm a little behind. I had to check this one out ahead of some others, starred tho!)

Stella, you did endure some serious sh!$. You got this random reformed Mormon to read all of the book, and it was compelling, good job! I learned some things about the temple that gave me the creeps. Your antagonist (husband) is a sad, sad human. I would have pulled over at the very next pit stop for you, and you're not even my wife! Be happy.

hello Stella- book- the secret life of a Mormon wife. read chunks of this book some 66 days ago and glad to see it has improved in the rankings' it fully deserves be higher; i said at the time that it was a page turner and on reading some more i still find it to be one of the better true stories on the site. it is with pleasure i give it my six stars and i wish you Stella success. tom bye from hugs to kisses'

I grew up Mormon, in Salt Lake City in the 70s and 80s. I don't get it; a "peculiar" people indeed, although I have nothing at all to complain about my wonderful family. They contunued to accept me for who I am even after I gained a strong testimony of the ridiculousness of such a bizarre set of beliefs; I've been an agnostic for 25 years.I've read your first two chapters; you have a straight forward, unpretentious, and readable style. Congrats for keeping your wits about you. I have a bit of Mormon stuff in my book Riding the Line; you can check out chapter 6 on the Hole-in-the-Rock road if you want. Those pioneers, however bizarre, they were certainly fervent ant tenacious! I'm new to the site, so when I figure out what "stars and backing" is, and read more of your book, i'll try to give you a plug.

I began this with the idea that I'd keep notes and let you know when I spotted typos, if I spotted any. But after a few chapters, I was so engrossed in the story I had to stop taking notes and just read. What an amazing story you have, what an amazing life you have lived! I am very, very glad you were able to stand up for yourself and get things straightened around. For you and for your children. And I'm glad you have been happily married now for quite some time! I wish you all the very best life has to offer! Below are comments on specific parts of the first few chapters. All the best, Judy CHAPTER ONE typo -- not really a typo, and I'm not really sure if I'm seeing this right, but it looks like there needs to be a space between "in" and "1830" in the paragraph beginning with "Mormons believe the early Christian Church was taken from the earth..." *** To the best of my knowledge, the word "reinforcement" is one word, not hyphenated, as it is in the paragraph beginning "My parents were both very strict, but my father was authoritarian and controlling." *** "It was wonderful to not have to be afraid all of the time." I can so deeply relate to that feeling! And I know you know that I really understand what that means. I am so glad for you now to have been able to get out of the hell you lived in, but I'm so sorry that you had to grow up in such a horrible home! *** I'm sorry, but reading along, I can't help but wonder about your mom. She made her life better by marrying Charlie, but she didn't seem too tuned into the struggles you were experiencing. I guess with nine children (including the steps), a new husband and home, and working as a nurse, she was pretty busy. Plus, she was recovering from having been abused, too. *** I have a hard time with human suffering. I have an impossible time with animals suffering. I can't explain it. The frog in your neural psych class! I would have wanted to turn that ice pic on the professor! What an evil man! GOOD FOR YOU for walking out!! And I'm with you on your spin on wars and violence, (generally, I think the prof needed to be whacked in the head with the ice pic!) *** That's great "a one-woman walking campaign for spring." !! (I think, but I'm not sure, that one woman ought to be hyphenated.) *** CHAPTER TWO "One day, towards the end of March, I had stopped by Mike's apartment. Mike started complaining about something (again!), and I had teased him by jokingly whining, "Bitch, bitch, bitch..." He proceeded to drag me over to the sink to try to wash my mouth out with soap. He poured freezing cold water down my back in retaliation as I escaped my intended punishment. I ran back to my apartment in the bitter cold, with wet clothes, furious that he had treated me like a child." 1) No one should treat a child like that. He treated you like property. He treated you as an inferior being, and set himself up in the position of a supreme being. 2) We are friends with a couple who are Mormon. He is not actively mean to her, but he refers to her like she's property, and her self-esteem is so low she doesn't see his behavior is keeping her down. She and he regularly use the word "obey" when they are talking about her in relation to him. Like she -- thinking she was really taking a stand -- said that after he got very ill, she was going to disobey him and visit him in the hospital. It never occurred to her that she should never have been thinking in terms of obeying or disobeying him! It's an insane relationship in which she works seven days a week, because they both have jobs, but when they get home, he relaxes and orders her around, and she does chores until bedtime. Every day of her life. *** Holy Cow! You married him less than three months after you met him! You poor thing! *** I don't understand this paragraph: "I was disappointed when Mom told me they would not be coming out for the wedding. Mom and Charlie, my brothers and two of my stepbrothers had all driven from West Virginia to Utah the previous August for my sister's wedding reception. Afterwards, we drove to Idaho, so they could drop me off at Ricks." I don't understand "afterwards, we drove to Idaho..." This says that your parents had come to Utah the previous August. Maybe I'm missing something. Also, I think "afterwards" is supposed to be "afterward" (no "s") *** I think something needs to be said about why Karen broke things off with Sam, this seems awfully abrupt! *** Wow. "...the stuff William allowed me to keep..." *** So Sam's girl split, then Rocky's wife split.... No info on why Rocky's wife split, either? *** Enter Orville, what a bastard! "All it needs is the smell of some homemade chocolate chip cookies..." ??? *** In the paragraph beginning "His dad drove a high-end luxury automobile and owned several other cars..." I think the word "I" needs to be inserted between "but" and "could" in the sentence "It wasn't apparent to me any sacrifices were being made, but - I - could see why help might be needed...." *** CHAPTER THREE I am going to stop commenting here so I can just read. If there is something glaring I'll make a note. *** ...This is amazing! This "religion" should be outlawed. This doesn't seem to have much to do with God, it seems to have everything to do with enslaving women!! *** CHAPTER FOUR "Here is what I expect from you, now that you are my wife." Wow. "I hope you've noticed how clean Mom keeps my dad's house..." Mom keeps my day's house!!!??? Not my mom's house. Wow! And you have 14 years of this!? Talk about brainwashing slaves! You poor thing! *** Myrtle the fertile turtle. Good one! *** These paragraphs seem to be in sort of reverse order of what they should be: 1) "We left his parents' house at a very late hour, and I was exhausted.... 2) "Then, believe it or not, we sat and visited with Williams family for several more hours...." It seems like they need to be reworked. *** This is just awful. I really feel for you! *** CHAPTER FIVE You should be out "witnessing" to young women who have been deceived into thinking God wants them to be slaves! That's the trouble with religions that place men above women. If you get a decent guy, there's not necessarily a problem. But the groundwork is laid out so that the abusive ones have no trouble being as abusive as they'd like to be. *** I'm amazed you neither committed suicide nor murder. You are an amazingly strong woman!! *** This is the second time you've mentioned letters from your father. Are you talking about your biological father or your step father? Because your biological father sounded like a horrible man. Your step father, you referred to as Charlie and as your Stepfather. I am confused because you are saying how important these letters from your father were to you. If it's Charlie, the feeling you describe about the letters makes sense, but I don't remember your saying anything about starting to call Charlie your father. If they are from your biological father, I don't remember reading anything about your having a change of heart about this abusive man. (Okay, later in the story you mention that your father did some nice things for you, but unless I've missed something, here is the first time you've mentioned him in a way that indicates that you have some positive feelings for him. Earlier, he was simply described as a very mean man. And you were a very frightened child.) *** Alex would have been the same - maybe not so mean as William, but still believing he was superior to you. *** Yes, I thought he was probably gay, too (Alex). What a shame that a "religion" can so poison people against themselves that they spend their lives suffering and living lies, and lying to themselves! What a horrible, horrible shame! *** Turned into a frog? More like Satan Revealed!! *** .... I stopped taking notes and just read through your manuscript, but I have to say I love this line: "I felt getting married again would simply be the triumph of hope over experience." An elderly friend of mine married the soldier who got her pregnant when she was sixteen and he was twenty three. Her Lutheran (Wisconsin Synod) religion told her she should "stand by her man." For sixty-some years she stood by this fat slob of an idiot who did nothing but verbally abuse her and the three kids. She's an alcoholic and has been since shortly after the second child was born. All three kids lives were ruined by this man and now by their alcoholic mother who never could put everything together and figure out how she had been manipulated to stay in this destructive relationship. You don't know how much you did for your kids by showing them by example that no one should have to put up with the kind of cruelty William and Orville foisted upon you! *** It is amazing that William and Orville, while being so evil that they are working on a plan to have you murdered, are still tuned in to the idea that the real bottom line, always, is money! When making plans to hire a hit man to murder you, they are working on getting someone who will do it "cheap." These guys are amazing! (Sorry, I said I wasn't going to comment again! It's hard not to, though!) *** I'm glad you found happiness, and I wish you all the best. I hope you publish this, it's a story that ought to be made into a movie! People hear about some of the wicked things men do to women and to their families via the Mormon church, but they quickly forget. Or they think that stories like the ones where an 80 year old man has fourteen wives, some of them in their early teens are so far-fetched that even if they are true, they are totally out of the ordinary. What a shame William and Orville never had to suffer for all of the suffering they caused their families! I wish you well, and it sounds like you are doing well! What do they say, "Happiness is the greatest revenge!" -- Judy

Really well written book. Good account of the Mormon Church and the secrets and lies. Only part way through, but backed and wishing you the best

A brave piece of work. Only read the first chapter, but it is pacey and easy to read. Very revealing and passionately written. Will watchlist it and read some more. Well done, and keep writing.

I found your first chapter engrossing Stella. Normally I avoid anything with the 'Harper True' tag. I think many memoir authors on this site try to force instant sympathy from the reader, but I found your narration to be very matter of fact and balanced, and this gives it an authentic feel. You described Mormonism - which isn't very well understood or popular here in the UK, in an insightful way, and at no stage did you openly condemn its practices. All religions have extreme controlling elements (or more precisely, certain individuals who choose to be that way), but your first chapter involved interesting philosophical elements, and you invite the reader to make their mind up without forcing it upon them. I hope to read more over the next couple of days, and am intrigued by the workings of the Mormon church and your own specific experience with it, and how much affect it had on your ex-husband's personality and actions. My rather uneducated view was that all Mormons were very nice and laid-back people - I blame The Osmonds for that! Anyway, this fascinating account has been watchlisted and highly starred. Best wishes for its success. Pete

I know the struggle you must have had in releasing this book. It is a great insight into the Mormon lifestyle which has been intriguing to me. I am only beginning to read the book and have already gained a better understanding into the religion. You see alot of Mormon issues in the news in my neck of the woods, Arizona. I think this book will do extremely well in the AZ, UT, ID markets. Great job and good luck.

Hi Stella This was a really interesting read. Mormon's are pretty rare in the UK, so I didn't know what to expect beyond the TV shows I'd seen. I have to say, hats off to you for writing this. It's a deeply emotional story and you write it well. Your pace is quick, but personally I'd like to have seen a little more about your parents. I found it fascinating that after your strict upbringing, they divorced and both remarried outside of the church. I didn't know if this was because of the pressures of the church itself - and I understand that you may not know, after all, children are rarely told the truth in those matters. But it was something that really turned my head. Highly starred Silva

Intrigued and wanting to know more about the LDS faith, I dug right in. Little did I know how much I would relate to you and your experiences. Having resided in the same area for a number of years, I have have been touched by this religion in ways I never expected. Not only in contact with Mormons but also with the abuse you suffered. In this tight knit community, either one follows the Mormon faith or one is simply an outsider. Your experience opened the window into this secret world and I applaud you wholeheartedly for sharing. I can only imagine the trauma that you not only felt in the church, but especially out. An exceptional and completely informative read! I look forward to the next one!

Intrigued and wanting to know more about the LDS faith, I dug right in. Little did I know how much I would relate to you and your experiences. Having resided in the same area for a number of years, I have have been touched by this religion in ways I never expected. Not only in contact with Mormons but also with the abuse you suffered. In this tight knit community, either one follows the Mormon faith or one is simply an outsider. Your experience opened the window into this secret world and I applaud you wholeheartedly for sharing. I can only imagine the trauma that you not only felt in the church, but especially out. An exceptional and completely informative read! I look forward to the next one!

Stella, Just finished Chapter 7. I'm continuing to be intrigued by your "horror story." It's amazing you ever got out! Susie Parker, Foul Player.

I am agnostic, but I was raised Mormon. My leaving the church however had more to do with me than with them. I have many Mormon friends that I still love and respect and they have never once tried to pull me back in. They dont criticise my life. They dont ask me to behave differently around them. We accept each other as we are and it's a great thing. Having said that, however, I didn't attend Ricks. I didn't go to BYU. I was raised 6 hours from SLC, so while we were well represented, the culture I was raised within is much different than the experience you described. The flavors of Mormons could put Baskin Robbins to shame. I would ask your readers not to judge millions of people on the first chapter of one woman's autobiography. There are all types, in every quarter. As for the writing...it's very loose right now. It reads like a first draft. You may have heard people talking about showing rather than telling...the chapter reads like I am sitting across from you and your telling me the story as the thoughts come to your head. Moment like Patti running out of the room with the lead singer stand out, because you are showing an emotional response to something the girl wasn't prepared for. Other points, like being the only Mormon family in town get lost. Where I grew up, we had one Pentacostal family in town, and people reacted to them...the kids in the family reacted to the townspeople reacting to them. A strange religion creates a vibe...and it's a living, breathing thing. Chatty's a good approach here, but it would benefit from editing to economize on words...try to get your idea across in the exact number of words necessary, so it reads like a bullet. I hope it helps. Good luck!

Stella, I read though Chapter 4 in one sitting and was mesmerized by the doctrine of the Morman Church. Especially the idea of the husband deciding whether to "resurrect" his wife upon death. How sick. Your writing flows smoothly and your bird's eye portrayal of the Mormon mindset, male and female, is both intriguing and appalling. That you were brave enough to leave and tell your story only adds to the complexity of this outstanding book. I will begin Chapter 5 today. That's how good it is! Backed and starred! Best of Luck, Susie Parker, "Foul Player."

This is interesting and very well and clearly written, it gets my vote. David

This would be a compelling story even if it was fictional, but the fact that it is true adds another dimension to it altogether. I love the book title - perhaps its the way it rhymes it just seems to work well. Not as convinced about the short pitch - it feels like part of the long pitch rather than something in its own right that punches you between the eyes? Something like "Is eternal freedom really worth a lifetime of capitivity? (poor example but you get the idea)... I can see huge cross over appeal for the mainstream Christian sector who would love another excuse to Mormon bash, and the general populace who are hugely curious as to what goes on behind the scenes. I am not at all surprised to see this book so high in the charts and I think this deserves to be published...

First of all, Stella, I found your book extremely revealing and interesting. I am not a religious person, I find the many different 'only true' religions being too complex and contradictory to believe (how can they ALL be the only true religion) yet I do envy those who do believe in something, as it must be a great comfort to them in so many ways, and you have a great deal of belief in your faith, which is sadly tested so hard, yet you manage to keep strong. I feel so sad for you over the loss of your babies. I have some very dear friends who are Mormons and they are very happy in their belief, so perhaps I am not really able to comment on your book, as it has clearly not been easy for you. Yet I am sure you are a true Christian, too. I have enjoyed reading your book very much. It is excellently written and is very moving. I have backed it with stars and on w/l. Kate Grimes - LIZZIE - CUPPA TALES - TALES OF WILLOW GREEN -ANNIE.

Very compelling writing; a good story written around your experiences. This a powerful way to point out your greivances and to give insight into a very different and unbalanced way of life. Highly rated. Michael Croucher (Bravo's Veil)

Stella, you're very brave to write this, and your way of writing it takes us into your life, into your heart and soul. You've also made this life of Church rule interesting, eye-opening. Your parents' divorce must've been a terrible thing in such a society, yet at the same time brought you immense relief, Patti's family's friendship, and Charlie. School aside, which must've been torture for an *outsider*, the college years, frogs excepted - and I shall have nightmares on that front now, appear treasurable. I am up to the wedding with the prospect of the trailer park, and feel alone with you. You have a terrific opening, and a terrific pitch - although I have to say there are probably a few too many exclamation marks!! The end line of the pitch alone, would make this a best seller. Actually, I'm thinking that the end part could go into your short tag line somehow. Instant best seller on here - and could, all by itself, attract trawling Publishers and Agents. I hope you'll consider it. Highly starred and backed for you - From Kay with love and sincere hopes for your success. (Waystation to Prosperity Street)

stella , let say this i'm recommendimg this book to my brother. Londen publishing company, he always looking for others work. You 'r writting about your experence and no can write about what took place but you! So my point of veiw YOU GO !!!!!!!!!!!

Stella, I backed your outstanding book this morning. Good luck and happy writing. If you could take a look at my novel, DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS, for your possible backing, your help will be appreciated. Good luck and happy writing. Dwain-Thomas

Sorry, but I could barely get past the first paragraph and its superfluous and incorrect use of commas. They're used in your sentences where they don't need to go, like before "and" and after "but." They're also used in places where other punctuation should go, taking over the jobs of the semicolon and the colon.

Hi Stella, I'm glad you are a Recovered Mormon and those who haven't yet are still Morons(sic). This is literature of the brave new world - candid and fearless writing, letting the whole world know about the fallacies of the myriad religions and rituals bedeviling this innocent planet of ours. In Inida, we too have several classes of religions and thousands of gods and goddesses. This fact seems to take the sting off the force of one God and that the followers of a single God seem to be struggling to bear the huge yoke of servility that their Order demands. I'm sure nobody can ignore your book and it needs to be published for the sheer truth of the work. I'm sure too that the sequels will be as interesting and relevant in today's world. Starred and WLed. Soon to be shelved All the best Jay Adiyarath EXPIRY DATE

I just finished reading your book and found myself wanting more. I love reading about religions that I'm not familiar with and Mormons are one of them. I hope you are successful with getting this published. Keep up the good work. I backed your book and starred you. GOOD LUCK!

I visited your page to ask for your support on my book and was drawn in by your story! I have added "The Secret Life..." to my watchlist and can't wait to give it a full read. What I have read so far is truly inspiring! In the meantime, I hope that you will visit my novel "Ana Grace - A Heart's Journey" and decide to give it some time on your shelf. It is a story full of adventure, tragedy, love and redemption. Ana Grace is begining to make its way up the ladder and your backing would be greatly appreciated! I promise to return the favor as soon as I can! Thanks in advance and God bless!

Disclaimer: My book is not the biography of "Molly Mormon," nor do I make any claim that it is. As I say in my pitch: "This is the story of my personal experiences as a Mormon wife and my journey out of psychological captivity." It is an autobiograpy, not a "contrived and twisted tale" from the recesses of a vivid imagination. While it may not be every single Mormon woman's story; it is a story many Mormon women can relate to. The "jerk" I was married to was in the bishopric when we were married, and has been Bishop of his current ward for many years. He is absolutely the product of his Mormon teachings. In fact any man who believes Mormon teachings can't help but be anything except a "jerk." My book does discuss Mormon doctrine, interwoven through my personal narrative, but these teachings are well-documented. It is in no way fictionalized or sensationalized. If I had been going for tabloid journalism, my title would have read, "God found living on planet named Kolob!" I'm sure every Mormon would understand that reference. How am I making it more bizarre than it is? How is that even possible? [QUOTE] Let me be clear: I do not like defending the Mormon church. I am as ex-Mormon as a Mormon can be. However, I didn't have to read very far into your book to realize this is yet another contrived and twisted tale aimed at making an already bizarre religion seem worse. The religion itself is unbelievable "as-is" without your misrepresentations and assertions that your experience was every Mormon's experience. You married a jerk. The fact that he was Mormon is secondary to the fact that he was a jerk. Your husband's family were jerks. Again, not primarily Mormons, primarily jerks. No one in my family belongs to the Mormon religion anymore. I have nothing good to say about the Mormon religion. That said, you were in an abusive marriage to a strange and jerky man and you are depicting the jerk's own personal beliefs as Mormon beliefs. They are not. I find glaring and troubling inconsistencies in your book almost from the first page. Yes, Mormons are pretty damn strange and the men do benefit from its teachings. Show me a major religion that doesn't follow that formula. I do need to thank you on behalf of my mother. The good laugh she got out of "cash registers in the Temple" was priceless. Maybe you have a future in tabloid journalism. [ENDQUOTE]

Let me be clear: I do not like defending the Mormon church. I am as ex-Mormon as a Mormon can be. However, I didn't have to read very far into your book to realize this is yet another contrived and twisted tale aimed at making an already bizarre religion seem worse. The religion itself is unbelievable "as-is" without your misrepresentations and assertions that your experience was every Mormon's experience. You married a jerk. The fact that he was Mormon is secondary to the fact that he was a jerk. Your husband's family were jerks. Again, not primarily Mormons, primarily jerks. No one in my family belongs to the Mormon religion anymore. I have nothing good to say about the Mormon religion. That said, you were in an abusive marriage to a strange and jerky man and you are depicting the jerk's own personal beliefs as Mormon beliefs. They are not. I find glaring and troubling inconsistencies in your book almost from the first page. Yes, Mormons are pretty damn strange and the men do benefit from its teachings. Show me a major religion that doesn't follow that formula. I do need to thank you on behalf of my mother. The good laugh she got out of "cash registers in the Temple" was priceless. Maybe you have a future in tabloid journalism.

An excellent premise. I entered the story expecting it to be a cult book but slowly realized that it was much deeper than that. And for you to go deep into the psychology of a mormon wife was really great. Backed it :)

I read the first chapter. It has given me a better understanding on this relegion. Thanks. I have rated it Red

I read the first chapter. It has given me a better understanding on this relegion. Thanks. I have rated it Red

Dear Stella, I really appreciate even more now our reconnection after reading your book! It was excellent and well written! I certainly had nooo idea all the things you had been through when I prayed for you that day in the parking lot at school. But we KNOW who did, and I give praise to Jesus Christ for that. You truly have been given a tremendous opportunity with this testimony to help alot of hurting women and men. They need to know they have value, purpose, and worth. Even through all the terrible heartache you went through,you were not alone in the fire. And you were delivered out of the fire! All of the hidden things coming to light on the Mormon Cult is very enlightening. They use the name of Jesus, when in fact, it is NOT the Jesus I know! He is Love, Righteousness , Peace, and Joy. Not control! The Law was only to show mans inadequacy and need of a Savior. And GRACE came as an answer to that need in the New Testament, and His name is Jesus Christ. Anyway, I have a love relationship going there, so its easy for me to get carried away! I believe these books you write will touch many people. You certainly touched me, and bless you for touching my family too!

The Secret Life of a Mormon Wife Non-fiction, memoir 1st person I read Ch 1 and will only comment to that extent. Pitch - both long & short are well written Premise - the author will tell all about her life experience in the Church of the Latter Day Saints Mechanics - this manuscript is professionally written and I didn't notice any errors at all. Pacing - Easy reading, with an even flow through Ch 1. POV - 1st person is appropriate for a memoir and this story never fell into the dreaded "I trap". Well done. Overall, Ch 1 reveals the MC's youth and was written in an entertaining fashion. Market: Hummm. I'm not sure if this is marketable, though I am sure that there is a good deal of curiosity about the Morman church. Perhaps it could be offered to group homes for battered and abused women. Or it might be well recieved by marriage counselors. Raechel Echo

I read all the posted 24 Chapters of your book Stella, and was deeply impressed by your personal life account of experience in The Church Of The Latter Day Saints. I found your book to be exceptionally educational and felt that its particular strength is, despite your horrible treatment, you refrain from writing a bitter diatribe against the Morman religion. Instead, you provide insights into a faith that - on this reading - demeans and enslaves women. The significance of the rituals and symbols are lucidly explained so that any reader can gain insights that help their understanding of the dis-empowering, malign and corrupting influences of a distorted form of organised christianity. The frank exposition of your harrowing humiliations and how you coped with them inspire admiration and respect - both for you as a woman and your personal testimony. Somehow, you developed and maintained a personal courage and a stoic attitude which comes across with homespun asides that are funny and ironic. However, every now and again they border on laconic flippancy that jars. This is a minor grumble which is intended to propose some changes to the text in that regard. I am sure your book will secure a wide readership once it is published. I would buy it and recommend it widely. ******. Tony Brady. - SCENES FROM AN EXAMINED LIFE - Books 1,2 & 3.

Hello Stella' 'The secret life of a mormon wife' After reading the first seven chapters of this very good book, i can say, that i found it to be a page turner and a very interesting story. The lead up to the marriage, that itself and after. It is up there with the better autobiography's on the 'authonomhy' site. It will do very well in this genre and i wish you good luck with it. Tom bye, from hugs to kisses; obliged if you would glance at mine, thank you

The title is so catchy that I had to check this out. Being a lover of non-fiction biographies I have read many but none quite like what you've got here. Very compelling and candid. Shelved and starred - well written indeed. Henry

Thank you for commenting on my book. I appreciate the book suggestion and will definitely take a look. Many of your questions will be answered in follow-up books. My next book will go far more in-depth into the church and its beliefs - this one is more to let people know who I am first, before I hit them with the really heavy stuff. The third book will take the reader back to my childhood and give more background on family and friends, as well as to explain what led me to become addicted to Mormonism. [QUOTE] - The Secret Life of a Mormon Wife - (Based on chapters 1-3) The whole premise of this autobiography is one that strikes me as eminently marketable. The Church of the Latter Day saints seems to have captured the popular imagination in recent years with big news stories having been broken and many a tale of strange goings on in Mormon compounds being told. An insider account of this is bound to pique some agent or publisher’s interest, as it did mine. The writing here is of a very fluid, readable style that I imagine would appeal to a wide readership. Female memoirs are Harper Collins stock-in-trade as I understand it so this is probably a very good place for the book to be. I would suggest that the author might benefit from having a look at Jane Hershey’s memoir Breath in the Dark, which made the desk here earlier in the year and which Harper Collins are apparently seriously considering publishing. That may give some idea of what publishers are after. The book can be found at this link: http://www.authonomy.com/books/21579/breath-in-the-dark/ One of the things which I think would intrigue readers most is a chance to see the inner workings of the church. This comes in very well in a fascinating chapter three, with a Mormon wedding, but there were a couple of times when I found myself thinking, ‘Wait, I want to know more about that!’. Examples being the baptisms for the dead and the Temple Recommends. I’d imagine expanding a little on things like this would really give the readers what they want. Onto the book itself in a little more detail…. First, the title. It does what it says on the tin but it sounds more like a sub-heading to me, omething which would follow a more punchy title rather than a title in its own right. Chapter one opens very well. I liked where the author chose to begin the story as it puts us right into the drama and gives us a clue of where we’re working towards. The writing is in a kind of chatty, readable style throughout and will, I’m sure, give the book a wide appeal. The frog story absolutely horrified me, as it should. That is definitely an image that will stay with me. As nitpicks, I’d say that I would have liked more on the other characters, the parents and Patti. Why did the parents get divorced? What does Patti look like? How does she talk? How does she act? Etc. I’d also like to have known a little more about how and why the author decided to go back to the church. Was there some sense of overwhelming guilt there that forced her back? Later there is an allusion to past ‘wild’ behavior but I didn’t really fully understand why go back when things seemed to be going so well and the family was not in the church. An excellent line here: “They must have rationalized that it was better for us to burn than to lose our virtue.” Chapter two has some excellent bits of character in here with the author’s in-laws being well sketched, Myrtle the Fertile Turtle and the hypocritical father in-law living in luxury. Chapter three is the most fascinating of those I read, introducing us both to a Mormon wedding ceremony and to how and why the text of the ceremony has changed over time. I enjoyed this aspect but I did have the sense it may intrude on the story a little, perhaps becoming a bit essay-like in places and it does take us away from the narrator’s thoughts and feelings at the time. I’d like to see the info on the text woven in more subtlely and sparingly to make the chapter more reader-friendly. All this being said, I am both a novice writer and no expert at all in autobiographies so I make no claim to being right in any of my comments or suggestions. The book is one I would see as having a wide appeal, both for its subject matter and its readable style. Highly starred for those reasons. All the best with it, Ross [ENDQUOTE]

Thank you for commenting on my book. I appreciate the book suggestion and will definitely take a look. Many of your questions will be anwered in follow-up books. My next book will go far more in-depth into the church and its beliefs - this one is more to let people know who I am first, before I hit them with the really heavy stuff. The third book will take the reader back to my childhood and give more background on family and friends, as well as to explain what led me to become addicted to Mormonism. [QUOTE] - The Secret Life of a Mormon Wife - (Based on chapters 1-3) The whole premise of this autobiography is one that strikes me as eminently marketable. The Church of the Latter Day saints seems to have captured the popular imagination in recent years with big news stories having been broken and many a tale of strange goings on in Mormon compounds being told. An insider account of this is bound to pique some agent or publisher’s interest, as it did mine. The writing here is of a very fluid, readable style that I imagine would appeal to a wide readership. Female memoirs are Harper Collins stock-in-trade as I understand it so this is probably a very good place for the book to be. I would suggest that the author might benefit from having a look at Jane Hershey’s memoir Breath in the Dark, which made the desk here earlier in the year and which Harper Collins are apparently seriously considering publishing. That may give some idea of what publishers are after. The book can be found at this link: http://www.authonomy.com/books/21579/breath-in-the-dark/ One of the things which I think would intrigue readers most is a chance to see the inner workings of the church. This comes in very well in a fascinating chapter three, with a Mormon wedding, but there were a couple of times when I found myself thinking, ‘Wait, I want to know more about that!’. Examples being the baptisms for the dead and the Temple Recommends. I’d imagine expanding a little on things like this would really give the readers what they want. Onto the book itself in a little more detail…. First, the title. It does what it says on the tin but it sounds more like a sub-heading to me, omething which would follow a more punchy title rather than a title in its own right. Chapter one opens very well. I liked where the author chose to begin the story as it puts us right into the drama and gives us a clue of where we’re working towards. The writing is in a kind of chatty, readable style throughout and will, I’m sure, give the book a wide appeal. The frog story absolutely horrified me, as it should. That is definitely an image that will stay with me. As nitpicks, I’d say that I would have liked more on the other characters, the parents and Patti. Why did the parents get divorced? What does Patti look like? How does she talk? How does she act? Etc. I’d also like to have known a little more about how and why the author decided to go back to the church. Was there some sense of overwhelming guilt there that forced her back? Later there is an allusion to past ‘wild’ behavior but I didn’t really fully understand why go back when things seemed to be going so well and the family was not in the church. An excellent line here: “They must have rationalized that it was better for us to burn than to lose our virtue.” Chapter two has some excellent bits of character in here with the author’s in-laws being well sketched, Myrtle the Fertile Turtle and the hypocritical father in-law living in luxury. Chapter three is the most fascinating of those I read, introducing us both to a Mormon wedding ceremony and to how and why the text of the ceremony has changed over time. I enjoyed this aspect but I did have the sense it may intrude on the story a little, perhaps becoming a bit essay-like in places and it does take us away from the narrator’s thoughts and feelings at the time. I’d like to see the info on the text woven in more subtlely and sparingly to make the chapter more reader-friendly. All this being said, I am both a novice writer and no expert at all in autobiographies so I make no claim to being right in any of my comments or suggestions. The book is one I would see as having a wide appeal, both for its subject matter and its readable style. Highly starred for those reasons. All the best with it, Ross [ENDQUOTE]

- The Secret Life of a Mormon Wife - (Based on chapters 1-3) The whole premise of this autobiography is one that strikes me as eminently marketable. The Church of the Latter Day saints seems to have captured the popular imagination in recent years with big news stories having been broken and many a tale of strange goings on in Mormon compounds being told. An insider account of this is bound to pique some agent or publisher’s interest, as it did mine. The writing here is of a very fluid, readable style that I imagine would appeal to a wide readership. Female memoirs are Harper Collins stock-in-trade as I understand it so this is probably a very good place for the book to be. I would suggest that the author might benefit from having a look at Jane Hershey’s memoir Breath in the Dark, which made the desk here earlier in the year and which Harper Collins are apparently seriously considering publishing. That may give some idea of what publishers are after. The book can be found at this link: http://www.authonomy.com/books/21579/breath-in-the-dark/ One of the things which I think would intrigue readers most is a chance to see the inner workings of the church. This comes in very well in a fascinating chapter three, with a Mormon wedding, but there were a couple of times when I found myself thinking, ‘Wait, I want to know more about that!’. Examples being the baptisms for the dead and the Temple Recommends. I’d imagine expanding a little on things like this would really give the readers what they want. Onto the book itself in a little more detail…. First, the title. It does what it says on the tin but it sounds more like a sub-heading to me, omething which would follow a more punchy title rather than a title in its own right. Chapter one opens very well. I liked where the author chose to begin the story as it puts us right into the drama and gives us a clue of where we’re working towards. The writing is in a kind of chatty, readable style throughout and will, I’m sure, give the book a wide appeal. The frog story absolutely horrified me, as it should. That is definitely an image that will stay with me. As nitpicks, I’d say that I would have liked more on the other characters, the parents and Patti. Why did the parents get divorced? What does Patti look like? How does she talk? How does she act? Etc. I’d also like to have known a little more about how and why the author decided to go back to the church. Was there some sense of overwhelming guilt there that forced her back? Later there is an allusion to past ‘wild’ behavior but I didn’t really fully understand why go back when things seemed to be going so well and the family was not in the church. An excellent line here: “They must have rationalized that it was better for us to burn than to lose our virtue.” Chapter two has some excellent bits of character in here with the author’s in-laws being well sketched, Myrtle the Fertile Turtle and the hypocritical father in-law living in luxury. Chapter three is the most fascinating of those I read, introducing us both to a Mormon wedding ceremony and to how and why the text of the ceremony has changed over time. I enjoyed this aspect but I did have the sense it may intrude on the story a little, perhaps becoming a bit essay-like in places and it does take us away from the narrator’s thoughts and feelings at the time. I’d like to see the info on the text woven in more subtlely and sparingly to make the chapter more reader-friendly. All this being said, I am both a novice writer and no expert at all in autobiographies so I make no claim to being right in any of my comments or suggestions. The book is one I would see as having a wide appeal, both for its subject matter and its readable style. Highly starred for those reasons. All the best with it, Ross

Hi Stella, I found your choice of title become so much more interesting soon after starting reading the first chapter. You’re immediately stating where you stand and it sets the scene well for what is to come as you continue to use the term “Mormon” throughout the book despite one of the earliest comments you make is that the term is considered derogatory by those within the LDS Church. Your memoir is fascinating and at times horrifying. It is certainly a compelling read and the raw material is definitely in place. It can only be improved by a bit of tightening up and cutting out some of the parts which do not add significantly to your narrative. I see you’ve only given a title to around half the chapters – any particular reason for this? I have to suggest that you take out the comments in brackets – maybe not the comments themselves if you can reword them to fit but I do think having the brackets sometimes interrupts your narrative. Similarly, whilst I’m aware that your sense of humour is one of your defining characteristics, in my view, sometimes the jokes, flippant comments and exclamation marks do not appear to be quite appropriate following on from some of the more intense or raw sections. I found myself wishing you had gone into more detail about the effect your parents’ divorce and departure from the LSD Church had on you. This only merits a couple of sentences in your book but I suspect your parents ceasing to be active members of the church must have had some influence on you, even if it was less than your prior religious upbringing, especially as you state that there weren’t many other Mormons around. Given that you have already told us that your parents and grandparents were “born in to the covenant”, surely the impact of your parents divorcing must have been phenomenal for both the immediate and extended family and would have affected the family’s position in the albeit small LDS community. I wanted to hear more about this but we are only told that you eventually stopped going to church yourself. In the same vein, you say “…my strict upbringing and religious convictions prohibited my considering even the thought of divorce” even though your own parents had divorced and you felt your mother had made a good choice in her second husband. I would be very interested to see you explore these seemingly contradictory themes more in the context of how your indoctrination appeared to dominate your logic and reason for so long. All in all, I think this has great potential and is an important story to tell. It reads well – I certainly had no trouble completing it. Your last sentence in Chapter 21 seems a natural place to finish – is this the end of your story? Wishing you every success. Best

Read the first two chapters. Had to force myself to stop or I would have stayed up all night reading. This book has to be published!!

Thank you Joshua for your comments and helpful suggestions. Yes, the frog story was meant to be symbolic. Although it is a true story, I felt it was also a perfect analogy for what this church does to its members. They scramble their brains and claim they will not feel a thing. The reality is that the Mormon Church causes a great deal of suffering. [QUOTE] The premise of this book drew me directly to it. I've heard through the grapevine stories such as this, but I've always wondered about their authenticity. I have no doubt a book like this would fly off bookshelves. Now, onto the actual writing. Though I'm not sure I like the opening as one big chunk of dialogue, I found it effective. You immediately create intrigue through the introduction of your ex-husband and the pending divorce. Once you started with your childhood, I was hooked. It was interesting to hear about being brought up in the Mormon church, and I'm glad you've chosen to take us through your personal story rather than just pointing out the wrongs of the church. It'll make your points much more effective later in the book. It's also effective to show your rebellious nature when you were younger. In my opinion, it makes you more relatable to your average reader. Not only is this educational, but it's presented in a very down-to-earth, conversational manner, almost as if you were sitting down and discussing these issues with someone. You give us an in-depth look at the outward Mormon church and the behind-the-scenes Mormon church. I loved the story about the frog. How disturbing! It's also interesting because if you read deeply enough into it, it could be viewed a symbolism. Intentional? I'm curious. I also found the multiple marriage proposals interesting. What a different culture! And how sad that your parents weren't even allowed to attend your wedding. Suggestions: Careful how many times you say Mormon in the paragraph beginning, "It was not easy..." Is "severely" necessary? Being persecuted and sometimes put to death expresses the severity. Try to avoid the repetition of laughed in the sentence, "He laughed easily..." The first chapter is a bit of a beast. It's all interesting, but I wonder if it could either be trimmed or broken into two? Perhaps with a bit more focus, you could cut away any unnecessary parts? Or maybe just make your childhood the first chapter and begin your second chapter when you head to college? Just a couple of thoughts. Is "greatly" necessary in "It surprised me greatly." Your writing is strong enough without unnecessary adverbs. Typos: Your quotation marks are off in the first paragraph. You don't need both ,-- in the sentence starting "That translates into..." It should be "on the south side." You have an unnecessary comma here: "Charlie, and Soupy Sale..." Should be "mounted on the ring." You can't mount in something. I have no doubt that this could be published. You have a great story to tell and you execute it well. With a bit of a trim, this will be even stronger. Good job! Highly Rated! [ENDQUOTE]

The premise of this book drew me directly to it. I've heard through the grapevine stories such as this, but I've always wondered about their authenticity. I have no doubt a book like this would fly off bookshelves. Now, onto the actual writing. Though I'm not sure I like the opening as one big chunk of dialogue, I found it effective. You immediately create intrigue through the introduction of your ex-husband and the pending divorce. Once you started with your childhood, I was hooked. It was interesting to hear about being brought up in the Mormon church, and I'm glad you've chosen to take us through your personal story rather than just pointing out the wrongs of the church. It'll make your points much more effective later in the book. It's also effective to show your rebellious nature when you were younger. In my opinion, it makes you more relatable to your average reader. Not only is this educational, but it's presented in a very down-to-earth, conversational manner, almost as if you were sitting down and discussing these issues with someone. You give us an in-depth look at the outward Mormon church and the behind-the-scenes Mormon church. I loved the story about the frog. How disturbing! It's also interesting because if you read deeply enough into it, it could be viewed a symbolism. Intentional? I'm curious. I also found the multiple marriage proposals interesting. What a different culture! And how sad that your parents weren't even allowed to attend your wedding. Suggestions: Careful how many times you say Mormon in the paragraph beginning, "It was not easy..." Is "severely" necessary? Being persecuted and sometimes put to death expresses the severity. Try to avoid the repetition of laughed in the sentence, "He laughed easily..." The first chapter is a bit of a beast. It's all interesting, but I wonder if it could either be trimmed or broken into two? Perhaps with a bit more focus, you could cut away any unnecessary parts? Or maybe just make your childhood the first chapter and begin your second chapter when you head to college? Just a couple of thoughts. Is "greatly" necessary in "It surprised me greatly." Your writing is strong enough without unnecessary adverbs. Typos: Your quotation marks are off in the first paragraph. You don't need both ,-- in the sentence starting "That translates into..." It should be "on the south side." You have an unnecessary comma here: "Charlie, and Soupy Sale..." Should be "mounted on the ring." You can't mount in something. I have no doubt that this could be published. You have a great story to tell and you execute it well. With a bit of a trim, this will be even stronger. Good job! Highly Rated!

This is a fascinating subject, and you write well - the eye glides over it. You also start well - I very much like the way you phrased the note about the names, and I liked the way you started with the hook. I've not read much True Life stuff - it's just not my preference - so I'm not sure how it's normally done but in fiction we might say "don't give us all the backstory straight away, we need to care about the character first!". I wonder if there's a way to break up the first chapter so it's not just a linear progression through your life - it's interesting but I wonder if there's a way it could be spiced up. I don't have an answer, and maybe I'm bringing too much of the literary fiction to bear on an entirely different genre, so feel free to ignore me. I'm reading Hillary Clinton's autobiography (only my second one ever) and she does go through her early life at the beginning (and I was similarly impatient for her to get on with the stuff I was really reading for) but what she does do is draw out the themes. So she'll be talking about, say, her mother, and draw out an incident that shows something about her mother and then draw the principle out from this and talk about how it affected her or was reflected later in her life - could you do something like this, foreshadow what is to come? Those are just my thoughts, for what they're worth, and as I said I'm no expert in this genre, and you certainly write well and engagingly. I would like to read all of this ... just wish I could do from a physical book!

I just finished the chapters you have uploaded so far and I'm very impressed. I think you are a great writer and will do extremely well, once it's published. GOOD LUCK

you have a very interesting book here; mormons are a bit of a mystery, in terms of what they actually believe...you write this very well; with skill and care. l shall certainly back and give 6 stars to help it up the charts... read SEASONS...

Well,you have a really interesting book here and the only one I've read so far that I would actually consider buying, if it was published.I'm very interested to know about the Mormon Church - its fascinating for example,that they don 't actually like being called Mormons!Who but a Mormon would know that!One other thing,you have included at the beginning something ignored(at their peril)by so many other people - and that is a hook,the talk with the lawyer is a brilliant start and really leaves you wanting more.Think of the person in the bookstore - they only read the first page - if that!I wonder if you would be so kind as to read the first chapter of my book 'A Buccaneer',which is set in the 17th century and is an historical,adventrure/romance about pirates,very best wishes,Strachan Gordon(from London)

Hi Stella I've had another look at your book and think it is much better organised and much improved. Good job. If I may, I would like to suggest that you break up your long pitch into shorter sentences and a number of paragraphs. To the potential reader at the moment it is a big block of text the casual browser might be tempted to skim or even skip. Think of it as the blurb on the back of a book to tempt a buyer to buy it and read it. Don't give away more than enough of the story than you need to spark interest. Hope this helps. Fr. Ambrose

Hi Stella Thank you for sharing your story, which I found both fascinating and horrifying. I read the first two chapters of the story you've uploaded. You have a good writing style and a number of funny, clever quips. Chapter 1: This seems far too long. I think it needs to be split into two, with the wedding and the honeymoon in a second new chapter, and some of your backstory from elsewhere relocated to the shortened first chapter. It would help if you said almost straight away that you were raised a Mormon. It took me some time to figure that out. I noticed that you used "Mormons" with aninappropriate apostrophe once. Chapter 2: Being intetested in the history of Old West, I know a little about the Mountain Meadow Massacre, but I imagine that most of your readers would not. Needs an explanation. You also repeat your definition of a "Ward", when you've already explained it. "Ralph could see nor hear no evil" doesn't work without "neither" before "see" in that sentence. "Strife for perfection" didn't make sense to me. Your remark about polygamy "just not being practiced in this world" is undermined by convictions of Mormon men from time to time for polygamy. Generally, I think your narrative is sometimes too much interrupted by explanation or back story. Perhaps you might consider short chapters between your narratives to do the explanations? The quips, while amusing, seem sometimes intrusive in the way you use them. Perhaps you might use a lighter touch in the narrative leading up to them to set up the joke for the reader? I'm no expert - just a fellow reader and writer - so use whatever might be helpful to you. Wishing you all the best, Fr. Ambrose

I think you have a fascinating story to tell. I would like to see you tell it "straight" - which you almost do, except for some parts where you add information that either goes backwards or forwards in time and that confuses the narrative. For the most part, you tell the story chronologically. I would weed out the parts where you are tempted to talk about the past or the future and let the story unfold for itself - saving all the secrets and the things that you know now for a later time. That will give the story an element of suspense. There were also some things that really confused me - you state that she was raised as a Mormon but then you say that her parents were not allowed to attend the ceremony. I found this confusing. Perhaps you'd be better off starting the story earlier in her childhood and then move on to the story of her marriage etc. Anyway, take it or leave it, those are my comments. Like I said, this story is fascinating - I know very little about the Mormon church and so it was really interesting to me. All the best, Rena (Bunderful)

Dear Julius B., I appreciate your taking the time to write a message. I hope you can find time to read my book and rate it. I would love some feedback. It has not been an easy story to tell, but I felt that it needed to be told. Stella [QUOTE] Dear Stella, "Mormon men use secret doctrines to hold their wives captive in often miserable marriages. Mormon women aren’t told those secrets until it is too late!" - reminds of old customs and cultures amongst my people, where women were not allowed or at best told to desist from eating eggs, chicken and goat's as well as fish. Hey, and this long, long ago, but rather up my mothers generation [I am in my mid forties]. Research has shown that men discouraged women to eat those food stuffs because if they shared them with women, then men would not eat to their feel. Women were allowed to eat only cow meat! I have not yet read a line beyond what I have quoted, otherwise, your short pitch paints similar picture typical of our men's greed. I will on about your Mormon men. Julius B. [ENDQUOTE]

Dear Stella, "Mormon men use secret doctrines to hold their wives captive in often miserable marriages. Mormon women aren’t told those secrets until it is too late!" - reminds of old customs and cultures amongst my people, where women were not allowed or at best told to desist from eating eggs, chicken and goat's as well as fish. Hey, and this long, long ago, but rather up my mothers generation [I am in my mid forties]. Research has shown that men discouraged women to eat those food stuffs because if they shared them with women, then men would not eat to their feel. Women were allowed to eat only cow meat! I have not yet read a line beyond what I have quoted, otherwise, your short pitch paints similar picture typical of our men's greed. I will on about your Mormon men. Julius B.