Hi Debbie, Never put off 'til tomorrrow what you can do today. So, here I am reading a little of Speedy... Beautifully written for the benefit of children, it is an enchanting and entertaining tale that will delight children of all age groups, from the very young right through to young teens - if they would but admit it - and of course the parents of children who find themselves reading Speedy as a bedtime story for the little ones that have not yet reached reading age. I cannot find anything to criticise at all. Your medal is richly deserved. I have read four chapters and on the evidence of those chapters before me, I judge that it should be made available in primary schools throughout the land at government expense -immediately! Good luck with editors. Max

Congratulatiosn! :-) good luck with the review! You'll do great! :-)

Hmmmm, I settled down on a rainy afternoon to read the first couple of chapters of Speedy McCready. Got thoroughly engrossed, so promised myself another couple. Then another. And now here we are, I seem to have read the whole thing and loved every minute of it. I love its rather quirky eccentricity It is terribly British, makes me wonder if it would be widely received in its present form and it's so delicious it would be a crime to mess about with it. It reminds me in the best possible way of some of the best comic characters from the glory days of the Beezer and Dandy. There are some insignificant errors in spelling and punctuation on which I won't even bother to dwell as the whole thing is so delightful they barely signify. I wonder how timeless it will be? I know Strictly seems to go on and on but might children in the not too distant future have no idea what it was? I love all the intricate details of each character, Mr McCready's large feet, Gran's whizzing knitting needles. Might the infernal PC brigade take exception to Grandpa being doped with sherry in a children's book? One can never tell in these days when triangular flapjacks are banned as dangerous weapons. I absolutely loved it, high starred it and am happy to back it. Lots of luck - you deserve to do well with this one. Tottie Limejuice Sell the Pig

Debbie, I had to return and read the first few chapters again. Even the second time around, laughter tears are flowing. Worse than the first time; I'm visualising the royal family on their bikes/treadmills along side the corgis. Brilliant and deserves to be published. Pat

Thoroughly enjoyed reading your book Debbie, it's a joy to read, well done. High Stars and bookshelf for you - very best of luck. Peeps x

I read chapter 1 and it seems to flow well, it also captivates the imagination which for children, is a must. This should get to number 1 easy. High Stars I.L.Books.

I have read a handful of chapters and love this book. It feels homely, innocent, full of good clean humor and I love it! You have my backing and highest stars! Well done Debbie, all the best in reaching the desk:) Elisa Keep Running.

Debbie, I love your book!!!!! I have only been able to read the first few chapters and have to go, but I have put it on my watchlist to come back to!! I laughed out loud at Mr. McCready asking incredulously if he would have to peddle to watch top gear or match of the day:) Love the hamsters involvement and I could really imagine children loving this story, as well as adults of course! Well done Debbie such a heartwarming and enjoyable read so far. Elisa Keep Running

Debbie, I've so far read the first ten chapters and will be back for more as soon as I can find the time. It's brilliant, delightful, charming, everything. Does the name Diana Wynne Jones ring any bell? I bet you two would have gotten along. I'm backing you, with all my little might. Hope you make it to the editor's desk this time. Just one little typo I saw in chapter 5: at one point, it says exercise patters instead of patterns. Didn't see any other mistakes or any other negative thing at all to point out to you. fingers crossed, Angelika finished. it's perfect. let me just give you the few typos and grammar errors I found: chapter 16: in the paragraph beginning with "Dillon rubbed his hands together" there's a double "how much", which doesn't look as if it's there on purpose. chapter 18: after Mr. Peabody goes upstairs, there's the sentence "of course he had was more than happy to allow his dog to eat Speedy once the ridiculous little rodent has served his purpose". one had too many, and I think the has should be a had instead. during the telephone call, "he was desperate not to miss a word of the conversation he been patiently waiting for". there's a had missing. shortly before Peabody and Wolfgang go out, "this was the usual sign for the bad-tempered cheat and his mangy dog to set off to the local park for one their walks." we're short an of here. chapter 22: "Mr. McCready putting up the last of the streamers". looks like there should be a was. and when Speedy sits on his little sofa, "if he wasn't a hamster, he would have given a speech". My instinct says "if he hadn't been a hamster". "Speedy wiped away a hamster tear as he nestled down in his new sofa and recalled the moment two weeks ago Dillon when had taken him up..." when Dillon. that's all. I really hope you'll make it to the desk. I want to buy your book for my brother's birthday. hugs Angelika

Hi Debbie, the title of this children's story has always appealed and finally got round to reading some of it tonight. I read the first ten chapters and I could see this being something I'd buy for my children and that they'd enjoy. Having chinchillas who love to keep the whole house awake running on their flying saucer wheel at night, they'd certainly appreciate Speedy's powers to generate electricity. It's topical, it's got a fun family dynamic, it's got the clever kids saving the nation and a nasty bad guy in Mr Peabody. Seems to me all the essentials are there and I think it would appeal to both boys and girls. I'm very late in reading this and you're close to getting your medal so all that remains is to say, good luck with the review.

Hi Debbie, the title of this children's story has always appealed and finally got round to reading some of it tonight. I read the first ten chapters and I could see this being something I'd buy for my children and that they'd enjoy. Having chinchillas who love to keep the whole house awake running on their flying saucer wheel at night, they'd certainly appreciate Speedy's powers to generate electricity. It's topical, it's got a fun family dynamic, it's got the clever kids saving the nation and a nasty bad guy in Mr Peabody. Seems to me all the essentials are there and I think it would appeal to both boys and girls. I'm very late in reading this and you're close to getting your medal so all that remains is to say, good luck with the review.

CHIRG Review of chapters 1-3 Very polished and enjoyable! You've woven all the quintessential elements of a storytelling that capture children's interest into your book: fast-paced, fun characters, a dash of slap-stick, kids out-smarting grown-ups, light-hearted narrative, etc. I'm not surprised that you're in the top 5. Best of luck; I have no doubt HC, or another publishing company, will want Speedy for themselves. Jealous, cnlumbat Daniel and the Sun Sword

CHIRG Review of chapters 1-7 I first read Speedy when I joined the site, reflecting back I remember leaving a very small comment (noob mistake) and I'd actually not read many books before reading it so I'm not sure if I actually appreciated how great this actually is. The strengths are the lively high pace of the story, the colourful characters and the language you use. At no point does it feel like you're insulting a child's intelligence which for this age group is done too often. It's kind of a break from traditional stories with mentions of E-Bay, XBox's and the television programs. These are the things kids are familiar with so using them as part of book will just help them connect to it so much more. Dillon's creativeness as a character in the first seven chapters is great, and his attitude feels natural when he doesn't get to beat his highest score. This would have been seen as a negative part of the story but the fact Grace has been going on that bike for ages makes for a funny sequence. It's a fine start to the story, it's not complicated, easy to read and will hold any child's attention whether they were reading it themselves or having the story told to them. I'll try to get a review of chapters 8-14 done in the next couple of days. Chapters 8-14 happened tonight. Okay so the story progresses pretty quickly which is very cool. You've obviously thought of the attention span of the target audience and there's always something happening. What the story needed was an antagonist and it has the perfect one for the story - Mr Peabody. I'd say he was a little unexpected which makes it even better, and his sidekick wolfgang will be scary from the eyes of little hamsters. There's a few funny parts, such as Speedy's thoughts when they're talking about getting another hamster. Dillon's natural behavior when things aren't going his way is spot on and Grace is still perfect for her support role. The names behind the offspring are very fitting and give each of them that bit of character. Chapters 15 - 22 The story was able to hold a 29 year old walking dead and elder scroll fans attention in one sitting! Whilst I think others have given you credit for the idea, I don't think you've received enough for how far you've stretched your imagination. Stan and Mitch's arrival was very good with Peabody in the background. At around the same point you've started to give him his first name which makes total sense because we've stopped seeing him as the teacher he's supposed to be. Very glad he gets what's coming to him. The family feel of the McCready's is admirable, mostly shown at 10 downing street. When Mr McCready adds that adults don't like the food too will make many people chuckle. It's funny that they enjoyed the queens company but not the PMs. Kind of fitting too with the circumstances of the story. Overall, a face paced, enjoyable, not too serious children's book which I'm sure would be enjoyed by many. As long as it stays on the top 5, I wish you best of luck with the HC review. John

CHIRG Review of chapters 1-7 I first read Speedy when I joined the site, reflecting back I remember leaving a very small comment (noob mistake) and I'd actually not read many books before reading it so I'm not sure if I actually appreciated how great this actually is. The strengths are the lively high pace of the story, the colourful characters and the language you use. At no point does it feel like you're insulting a child's intelligence which for this age group is done too often. It's kind of a break from traditional stories with mentions of E-Bay, XBox's and the television programs. These are the things kids are familiar with so using them as part of book will just help them connect to it so much more. Dillon's creativeness as a character in the first seven chapters is great, and his attitude feels natural when he doesn't get to beat his highest score. This would have been seen as a negative part of the story but the fact Grace has been going on that bike for ages makes for a funny sequence. It's a fine start to the story, it's not complicated, easy to read and will hold any child's attention whether they were reading it themselves or having the story told to them. I'll try to get a review of chapters 8-14 done in the next couple of days. Chapters 8-14 happened tonight. Okay so the story progresses pretty quickly which is very cool. You've obviously thought of the attention span of the target audience and there's always something happening. What the story needed was an antagonist and it has the perfect one for the story - Mr Peabody. I'd say he was a little unexpected which makes it even better, and his sidekick wolfgang will be scary from the eyes of little hamsters. There's a few funny parts, such as Speedy's thoughts when they're talking about getting another hamster. Dillon's natural behavior when things aren't going his way is spot on and Grace is still perfect for her support role. The names behind the offspring are very fitting and give each of them that bit of character. Chapters 15 - 22 The story was able to hold a 29 year old walking dead and elder scroll fans attention in one sitting! Whilst I think others have given you credit for the idea, I don't think you've received enough for how far you've stretched your imagination. Stan and Mitch's arrival was very good with Peabody in the background. At around the same point you've started to give him his first name which makes total sense because we've stopped seeing him as the teacher he's supposed to be. Very glad he gets what's coming to him. The family feel of the McCready's is admirable, mostly shown at 10 downing street. When Mr McCready adds that adults don't like the food too will make many people chuckle. It's funny that they enjoyed the queens company but not the PMs. Kind of fitting too with the circumstances of the story. Overall, a face paced, enjoyable, not too serious children's book which I'm sure would be enjoyed by many. As long as it stays on the top 5, I wish you best of luck with the HC review. John

I just saw your message to someone else. I did take your book off my bookshelf - to make way for others - and I thought you didn't need it to stay there now you're so high. But, having seen your remark, I have reinstated it because it's brilliant. CJ Bowness The Accidental Adventurers

I thought it real funny when Dillon suggested turning his knitting granny into an energy source, though the hamster wheel is a cute idea. Poor Speedy, though, that’d be a lot of running for a hamster, powering a human house. Then a hundred hamsters – hey, my kitties would have a field day. This is a funny story. I can relate to Dillon as I was quite the science glutton as a kid too. I wonder how many of these projects we’d actually try if our world nations suddenly did lose power . . .

Debbie: Speedy is a great read! You draw the reader in with the little one in chapter 1 who's eager to prove his genius. You prove yours by exciting the reader with a plot with just the right amount of realism, and creative problem solving. It reminds me of competitions we used to do with kids at a magnet school where I taught: Odyssey of the Mind and Future Problem Solving. You've engaged me as a reader, entertained me, and I just know this book will be a hit when others learn about it! bj

Love it, love it. Up to chapter six and will be back. My children will enjoy it, will read some of it to them. We have a hamster called Buster who spends a lot of time racing around on his wheel. High stars and will put you on my book shelf very soon. (although it does not look like you need my help yet) Now where did put that battery and jump leads? BUSTER...

CHIRG Hi. The idea is a gret one and I’m sure children would enjoy reading this. I liked the characters and the way you paused the story to give an amusing detail - Dad wanting to sit on a cushion when he's sitting in the garden chair etc. I felt that some of the dialect from Grace was quite grown up as she is only 8 and I wondered what made Speedy suddenly like Augusta. In chapter 13, he’s not at all keen on her when she arrives, but the following morning, they are snuggled together. I did find a couple of errors and there are some commas missing here and there but it didn’t stop me enjoying the story - not sure if these have been pointed out. She’s generating more energy that any of us do on the bike. – should be ‘than’ It’s moving, cried grace as they stared at batter store – missing ‘the’ All in all, an entertaining story. Alan.

This is utterly delightful! Brilliantly written - I found myself happily smiling as I read it. I'm not at all surprised it's doing so well. Congratulations. I have put it on my bookshelf to continue reading later and given it lots of stars. CJ Bowness The Accidental Adventurers

I loved this, Debbie. The premise is contemporary but hilarious - and you tell the story very well. I would have perhaps liked to hear more about Speedy and Augusta's blossoming romance - I think there's a good opportunity for humour there. I also wonder whether it may appeal to publishers more if Dillon's character is female - a girl with an interest in science is perhaps a little edgier. However, Dillon is a well drawn character, and I found it easy to sympathise with him. Good luck with this, it made me giggle!

Excellent concept for a children's book. Its well written in that there are few grammar errors, the cadence makes for easy reading and the imagery is well described.

great read...very hi stars. will keep you on my shelf for the balance of the month. Get some sleep....this one will land on the desk. very good work!

CHIRG Clever concept, well-written, topical and ironic. Well done! My only query regards the cover - I looked at the cover expecting a story for much younger readers.... Lisa Great Big Safari Park Stories

Hello Debbie I love your idea of making people work for power. I love they way you write and I am sure children will love it. Can't wait to read it to my grandson who is 9. I will let you know what he says. I am have just read up to chapter 6 and have smiled all the time I was reading. I like the way you write, you move the story along and everything is there for a reason. Great story Joyce

The descriptions are vivid and engaging, the story full of humor and ironies. I liked it. I think most kids as well as adults would enjoy this book. What a clever way to inspire the kids to do something for their own health! In my past life I used to write on health and wellness. Getting people to engage in a routine exercise and develop good health habits were always a challenge for the healthcare professionals. How about cutting into the habits that lead to their health problems and challenge them to do something for themselves, the way you have subtly and cleverly presented here. It's great!

suppose you've read Glenn Beck's Agenda 16 with a similar idea, though definitely not for children. Good luck with your take on the topic! bjack Please see my nonfiction: Job Loss:What's Next?...

suppost you've read Glenn Beck's Agenda 16 with a similar idea, though definitely not for children. Good luck with your take on the topic! bjack Please see my nonfiction: Job Loss:What's Next?...

CHIRG- Speedy McCready starts with a hook that's hard to beat. Every kid's worst nightmare in this day-no electricity. This makes you want to keep reading. I could not put this book down and as a teacher, I would have Speedy McCready on my classroom bookshelf in a heart beat. I love the title, too. It's so catchy that I would have too pick it up just to find out what it's about. Some thoughts to consider- The battery store: When you first mentioned the battery store in chapter two, I wasn't sure what it was...but that's probably just lost in translation (England/America). But I also thought that you might want to add a few more instances in the beginning about the battery store. In Chapter 7, you talked about the pointer on the dial moving. It might help to show how important Speedy is by having the dial show up earlier to show how hard it is for the family to create energy. The other thing to consider-The evil teacher Mr. Peabody: When he was mentioned before Chapter 9 when Dillon's in class, I thought the teacher was nice because suggesting Dillon join the competition. You may want to add more hints that he's much more dastardly in the beginning. Maybe even put in a few more scenes showing how mean he is. Editing points- I noticed two mistakes, wasn't' sure if you'd want them mentioned or not but in Chapter 8-there is an extra 'and' in your sentence about the grandparents. And in Chapter 18-speedy is missing the y. Overall, I hope you get this published real soon so I can buy it and share with my students!

Debbie, what can I say other than it's a great idea for a book. It seems that everyone has seen or heard stories of a great power outage that stops everything in its tracks. You took that and ran in another direction and made a comical story of it. I usually don't find myself drawn to children's books but this isn't the norm for that category. The story moves easily and has the reader seeing Dillon's ideas could actually work. Definitely a winner, high stars! Bryon Decker The Stran's Curse Dear Mr. Killer

Debbie, I have only read the first chapter of Speedy McCready and already I am enthralle. Children's book or otherwise, this is one of the best reads I've had in a while. I did pick up on two minor errors."Apparently there'll be power for the fridge." replied Dillon. The Prime Minister said so."... Surely there should be inverted commas before The Prime Minister. Also, the word "replied" should either be capitalized or the end of fridge should be a comma not a full stop. Other than these two minor errors I honestly can't fault you work. Rated highly and backed. I hope to see this on the editors desk before long. I'm sure you'll do brilliantly. Georgie.

Debbie, I have only read the first chapter of Speedy McCready and already I am enthralle. Children's book or otherwise, this is one of the best reads I've had in a while. I did pick up on two minor errors."Apparently there'll be power for the fridge." replied Dillon. The Prime Minister said so."... Surely there should be inverted commas before The Prime Minister. Also, the word "replied" should either be capitalized or the end of fridge should be a comma not a full stop. Other than these two minor errors I honestly can't fault you work. Rated highly and backed. I hope to see this on the editors desk before long. I'm sure you'll do brilliantly. Georgie.

Debbie, I have only read the first chapter of Speedy McCready and already I am enthralle. Children's book or otherwise, this is one of the best reads I've had in a while. I did pick up on two minor errors."Apparently there'll be power for the fridge." replied Dillon. The Prime Minister said so."... Surely there should be inverted commas before The Prime Minister. Also, the word "replied" should either be capitalized or the end of fridge should be a comma not a full stop. Other than these two minor errors I honestly can't fault you work. Rated highly and backed. I hope to see this on the editors desk before long. I'm sure you'll do brilliantly. Georgie.

A simply brilliant and charming tale expertly told. I found it very creative and would love for my own children to read it. Well done! Ken Spears

This is brilliant, Debbie! I love it. Your dialogue is believable, and gosh, it made me think! The grids are getting old, and we're always afraid of brown outs and power outages. What if your story comes true in the not so distant future? I love your characters. You have honed your story to perfection. You appear ready for the desk! I am excited for you! I am putting you on my WL, and hopefully I can squeeze you into my shelf next month. I've already made so many promises! If by some terrible luck you don't make desk next month, I will definitly have room the next month. Crossing my fingers for you, girl! Sincerely, Donna Jessup and the Teleporter

Hi Debbie, I've read almost a half of the book and the ending. I like the idea - very modern, light-hearted and inspirational for youngsters. There's educational element there, too. It flows very well, is interesting and funny. I would recommend it to any kid.

Debbie, I am certain this will be a huge hit with children of all ages. As a teaching assistant in a primary school, I know children really love books with humour, as well as ones that treat them with respect - this seems to do both. Well done - I loved it. Highly starred. Michelle Richardson - 43 Primrose Avenue

This is such a cute story. I love the title and the cover. It was the synopsis that wanted me to read more. It's written more for a British audience but I can easily imagine an American spin on this as well. Had to back it and all the best Kirk "Aethunium"

Ha ha ha, Debbie. This is genius! I haven't read a children's book for years, and if this is what they are like these days, I'm missing out. I laughed out loud at the though of wiring up gran and grandpa to the battery store, and Speedy the hamster is brilliant! I'm up to chapter 7 and this has really brightened up my day. I'm going to let my 8 year old grandson take a look at this, he's an avid reader and loves all things remotely science, so I'm guessing he will love it. Great, flowing, writing with a very current storyline. Brilliant!

Ha ha ha, Debbie. This is genius! I haven't read a children's book for years, and if this is what they are like these days, I'm missing out. I laughed out loud at the though of wiring up gran and grandpa to the battery store, and Speedy the hamster is brilliant! I'm up to chapter 7 and this has really brightened up my day. I'm going to let my 8 year old grandson take a look at this, he's an avid reader and loves all things remotely science, so I'm guessing he will love it. Great, flowing, writing with a very current storyline. Brilliant!

Great idea. I've read two chapters and love it already. Good pacing, too. I think it probably needs a quick once-over for commas etc, but that's my only criticism. You should get this off to an agent, you know, especially in the current climate. I reckon you stand a really good chance of getting this published, because the market for it is now. R

I enjoyed this fast paced read. I got to the part where the pensioners took offense, then needed to beg off for some house cleaning, I look forward to talking to my children about this book and finishing it up. Thank you for sharing, a gem I am glad I did not overlook! Judith

I've only read chapter one so far but what a great concept. It's captivating and interesting while inviting the reader in. I really like this one. It's very creative and well written. The flow of course, is great and you can follow easily which is necessary for children. I will be continuing reading on soon. Wonderful storyline here. High Stars from me and your on my WL. Thanks for sharing this one with us! -Lyn Forty-Four Footprints Following Me -Surviving Manic Depression- My Story & The Real Truth on Managing It

Debbie, I have just read the first three chapters of your delightful story. This reads just like a published book I would pick up in the library. It is a smooth, simple, yet intriguing story - I found no problems or errors, just a good story ready to be published and enjoyed by anyone of any age. I can see why this book is so highly ranked. I have one book on my shelf currently that is at number 5. As soon as his book makes the desk, I will place yours on my shelf to help give that extra nudge towards the desk. So glad to have read this and to have "met" you here - will be back sometime in the future to continue! Best of luck, I can see this getting published easily! Ruby

a very novel and funny story. I enjoyed reading the first 3 chapters. Such an unusual scenario. A delightful story and made me smile. Hope this story goes far. Will read more over the coming days.

Here for the read, as promised. :) First off, I really like the idea. We all rely heavily on electricity these days, I know myself I wouldn't last long without it, so seeing that taken away is a bit of a nightmare scenario. Your writing is practically flawless and easy to follow, and it felt as if the chapters flew by, because I was curious to see how they would manage. I'm out of time right now, so I'll leave my real-time comments and hope they'll be helpful. Chapter1 - ’the P.M.’s hand was shaking badly (at this point)’, the last part is superflous - Personally, I think the story is developing too fast here. We get no real sense of who the characters are or how the world works before you ‘drop the bomb’ on them, and this takes away some of the delivery of the story. Chapter 2 - The first sentence here reads a bit awkward to me, maybe it would read better with ‘Two weeks later, Mr McCready was eating his words’ - When Dillon is thinking that Grace usually is clever for her age, you use italics – which suggests inner monologue – but keep past tense, which doesn’t make sense if it’s inside his head. - Wait, so it isn’t just the exercise bike that generates power, but knitting and tapping your foot too? How does that work? I’d like this explained better. Chapter 3 - I’m actually surprised that the mother is so lenient with Dillon for not doing his part of the bargain with his sister. My mother would have stomped up the stairs and demanded that I work my share. - ‘end of (this) bed’, should probably be ‘his’ bed - I thought the mention of the corgis would give them the idea, not the grandparents… Chapter 4 - It conflicts that he ‘muttered’ and ‘sat bolt upright’, because one is relaxed and one isn’t - Actually, I would have liked to know about the hamster before, maybe that he still keep it in his room, and hearing the wheel feeds his idea. Otherwise, it comes off as a bit of a coincidence that he suddenly remembers when the reader didn’t have a clue. If you get what I mean? - ‘tell them to let me know and I perhaps I can offer a little help’, cut an ‘I’ - ‘kept him awake at night so had probably blown the chance’, missing a ‘he' before 'had' Overall, this is a fun and unique children's story that I'm sure will do well once it's published - and I don't see why it wouldn't be. High stars and I wish you best of luck with this! :) Sabina Frost Annie Get Your Ghost

Hey Debbie, CHIRG-Loved the humourous angle on what would be a very serious situation. I am sure any kid who reads this will spend a lot of time bugging their parents for a hamster of their own. Hopefully, they won't try and attach wires to their grandparents anyway :) Patrick Lynch The Spirits in the Shadows

CHIRG REVIEW Debbie, Here are my thoughts over SPEEDY MCCREADY. First off, let me congratulate you on number 13! I know it takes a lot of work to get to that spot. I will say from your long and short pitch, I am already expecting a comedy. Your short pitch had me laughing, imagining a bunch of little hamster running the entire power grid. I also love the idea of a book about an environmental issue that is being aimed at young kids. What a way to raise awareness for the issue and get kids reading! As I go through, I focus mainly on my thoughts as a reader, and steer away from the grammar. CHAPTER 1 I like how we are presented with the main problem(power outtages) right away. This is going to grasp the target age group’s attention, which is a lot shorter than the average adults! I like Dillon, I think he is age appropriate, but I do think it is odd that the parents believe it is all a joke. Perhaps this is me being form the States? I don’t know, there just seemed to be something off about the ending. Perhaps this is what the parents say, but they actually are concerned, but don’t want to worry Dillon. After reading the first chapter, I could really see illustrations going along with this. Is that something that you are planning on including? This is vaguely reminiscent of Beverly Cleary’s work, I can only imagine the type of predicaments that Dillon is going to find himself in, especially trying to get the hamsters to create power! Good luck on your final push to the desk! A

I really like this book - the idea is genius, and the way it's delivered isn't far behind. It's like a humourous take on dystopia, for children; it doesn't sound like it should work, but it really does! I love all the characters, the realistic way the friction between them is described when one of them has to work for the others to enjoy their TV programmes, the odious prime minister, etc. What I love the most, though, is the fact that everyone tries to come up with ways to save themselves from any extra effort, even to the point of harnessing the power of a pair of knitting needles! Very clever, very engaging and lovely to read. I'll make a point of reading the rest of it as soon as possible.

I really like this book - the idea is genius, and the way it's delivered isn't far behind. It's like a humourous take on dystopia, for children; it doesn't sound like it should work, but it really does! I love all the characters, the realistic way the friction between them is described when one of them has to work for the others to enjoy their TV programmes, the odious prime minister, etc. What I love the most, though, is the fact that everyone tries to come up with ways to save themselves from any extra effort, even to the point of harnessing the power of a pair of knitting needles! Very clever, very engaging and lovely to read. I'll make a point of reading the rest of it as soon as possible.

I love this! Great writing:)

I love this! Well done:)

I love this! Well done:)

CHIRG Hi Debbie, I stand by what I said before, this is a great story. And I love Gran, with her Olympic knitting needles. This is still on my WL and will be back on my shelf well before the Ed's ultimatum. Jane. x

Very good, placed on my shelf.

First of all, I have to say - great read which is why I've put it on my bookshelf and starred it highly. It rattles along at a fast pace, it has loads of humour and the characters are great - I particularly enjoy evil stained-tooth Peregine Peabody! Not sure what age group you were thinking of but I would guess it would definitely appeal to top end KS2, years 5 and 6 (9-11) and in terms of language and structure, I say that you've got it about right for them. It reminds me very much of books like Jeremy Strong's 100 mile hour dog which is aimed and very successfully too! at that market. I loathe people suggesting different approaches to me so feel free to ignore but one thing I did think was that there are several points where major events are dealt with by description only with only one progatonist and that the long description is echoed by their own thoughts and views. For a children's book particularly, it might make these sections even more vibrant if several things could happen at once and include dialogue. Eg in chapter 18, Speedy reminiscences at length about Peabody's marking techniques and how shocked he is and then how he saw the connector being put into the jiffy bag and then makes his escape and sorts it out. Could those actions take place more simultaneously? eg the reader watches Peabody put connector in bag, Speedy then escapes WHILE Peabody is in the room marking papers and has to carry out his rescue plan unseen while at the same time the teacher is commenting aloud on what he is doing. This would give the scene more life and add a bit of tension as Peabody looks up and the hamster has to hide or the hamster squeaks in outrage at Peabody's doings and the teacher looks round startled. Good luck with the book - I hope you do well with it. Annemarie

Hi Debbie This one is a winner! I always like a childrens book to have a strong moral compass and this story does a superb job! It motivates children to use their initiative and think about solutions for challenges in life. This is a light hearted story with a very important lesson weaved in and presented to children in an exciting way! Well done and 6 stars!

Hiya Debbie, Have got to the end now. Firstly, well done. It's a great concept - simple as all best ideas are - but the book sustains it very successfully. I could really see this on many kids' bookshelves. I'd be interested to know what age group you think would appreciate this most? The plot would have broad appeal I think but the language is actually quite mature - for instance I would happily read this to my eight year old but I'm not sure he would have the confidence to read it for himself. Doesn't matter either way but I just wondered whether you'd aimed for a particular range? Idle curiosity! Anyway, best of luck. Bruce :)

Dear Debbie Happy New Year from a fellow authonomist! Having published non-fiction books for twenty years, I’ve just written my debut novel, ‘The Prodigal Father’ - a tale about a runaway dad’. Its genesis lay in a question I asked on a walk with my black Labrador a few years ago: ‘if the story of the prodigal son were to be told today, what would be different?’ Straight away, what came into my head was this: that it would be the father not the son who left home for the ‘far country’. From there I began to write a short story about that morphed into a novel. My short pitch is that it’s a gritty and redemptive tale of survival with hints of heaven and rumors of angels. Link: http://authonomy.com/books/49927/the-prodigal-father/ I hope you’ll find time to read it. If you’d like to comment on it or place it on your shelf, I’d be delighted. Happy reading… Happy writing… Mark Stibbe

Hiya Debbie, Have read 5 chapters so far - will carry on over the next few days. I really like the concept. This is exactly the sort of story that would capture the imagination of my kids. Will write more when I've read a bit more. Best wishes Bruce :)

I am more than thankful for your kind words regarding my short stories you read. My appreciation increased as the value of your comments increased all the more upon my reading through your book. I found myself smiling at the cuteness, almost wishing that he wasn't so brilliant because I think a bit of exercise and outdoors time is sorely missing. I really like your lighthearted approach, as losing power nowadays is the equivalent of an apocalypse, but you managed to keep it witty and not too heavy. Best of luck!!! Jane Poe Keenan-author of: In a Flash! A Collection of Flash, and Other, Fiction by the Author!

Just read Chapter One. What a great idea for a book, I'm jealous! I'll keep reading so long as the power doesn't go out. :)

I like the idea of generating our own electricity, and I liked the humor in some of the chapters, this is a good story :) Linda

CHIRG review Speedy McReady Pitch: This sounds like an entertaining and informative book for children which could possibly even be used for cross-curricular study in schools? As a pitch this sounds engaging, interesting and fun. C1: I like the opening reference to children on computer games, etc- very apt! Also the unique idea is set up very quickly and I like the social comment that you subtly make about the nation’s habits, etc. One small thing, should a question mark come after the rhetorical question: ‘…. Power needed to run their homes?’ Love the use of humour and the family interaction around the table. I love the irony of having to pedal to watch TV too! C2: The story moves at a good pace and each Chapter clearly moves the plot along. I couldn’t fault any of your writing. It made me think of the family in David Walliams’ ‘Mr Stink’ although I’ve not read it, but watched it over Christmas. Maybe because you have the Prime Minsiter in it too. High stars, well done.

CHIRG - Great story!! I was just coming to add to my wl, but the idea grabbed me and I had to check it out. Easy to identify with the characters and, having Speedy as a main role is a fun, creative, twist to the story. It will empower the child reader that they can make a difference and have a go at different experiments etc! Beverly Jenni's Amazing Adventures

HI again! Got to read some more. Wanted to see if your writing was consistent over the rest of the chapters. Sooo great! bright and clear. Description is wonderfully spread in and out of the dialogue, trickling in and around the characters so that you dont realize things are being "described," you just go there, and see it all. Such a fun story. Such lively personalities. :-) The plot continues to move- pulling the reader along with a smile that just doesnt stop. I noticed a couple things you might want to take a look at.: An extra "I" - Chapter 4 " . . and I perhaps I can offer a little assistance. . ." then there seems to be a lapse in the story line between the end of ch 5 and the beg of 6, but then ch 6 and ch 7 are the same chapters except for the endings. I wondered if you had uploaded the 'wrong" chapter 6 one time when you were updating your book.???? check it out. :-) otherwise, really fun! going to be a great book for kids and families. I can see it being published and spotlighted by schools for their reading programs to inspire thought and creativity! :-) fun movie too. :-) good luck to you! 6 stars. I 'll back you as soon as I can. Jeannette Singleton Journey to Kalado're

Debbie. This is genius. I am smacked in the face with the quality of your writing and I see no reason why this book wont go all the way. My type of writing is easy because it is something I have done in my life but to come up with and write something like this is fantastic. I would love to see this in the shop with loads of illustrations all over it with one of the artists from a famous comic......I cant praise you enough. So well done and happy new year to you. Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R) Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you?

Debbie. This is genius. I am smacked in the fae with the quality of your writing and I see no reason why this book wont go all the way. My type of writing is easy because it is something I have done in my life but to come up with and write something like this is fantastic. I would love to see this in the shop with loads of illustrations all over it with one of the artists from a famous comic......I cant praise you enough. So well done and happy new year to you. Sean Connolly. British Army on the Rampage. (B.A.O.R) Please consider me for a read or watch list wont you?

So cute! This is going to be a favorite of mine! Just started it today, but loving it! Great story. Fun characters. Alive and full of personality. :-) Great writing. Nothing slowing me down at all! just a wonderful read. :-) I'll be moving things around so I can get you on my shelf! good luck! Jeannette Singleton Journey to Kalado're

Speedy McCready by Debbie Roxburgh The pitch clearly defines this as set in United Kingdom, without stating the fact. It sounds like a lot of exercise and fun. The cover art is ideal for a hamster that helps power the nation. It’s always fun to read a children’s book on Authonomy. S missing -> secretly pleased the her brother’[s] favourite show wasn’t on. ‘Well’ is used to start several sentences in a row. Extra space between -> computer game in the first [ ] place. If only tapping our foot and knitting were sources of electrical energy. Clever. The first three chapters flew. The McCready family stepped up to serve their needs only to discover the difficulty of living without electricity. This timely story encourages children to think twice before they turn on another game without recognizing the value of what we take for granted. This story earns high stars!

Well written, crazy idea. but that's what writing is about. Asking the what if question. Frank

Hi Debbie, Read the first 5 chapters. What an original, environmentally friendly idea (though I don't necessarily buy into all the ram-it-down-your-throat green-brigade propoganda); this creates awareness without being overtly political. Written with such flow, and so easy to follow, perfect for kiddywinks. Easily the best children's book I've read on this site. High stars, and backed. M.J The Magpie King Front Crawl Frankie

Exciting pitch. Reminds me of a teenage girl (CNN heroes 2012) who took a project of collecting used oil from restaurants in huge quantities and recycled to heat the houses that are without air heating. I really love to read this kind of motivating literature. venkatarama Ozoneraser

I really enjoyed this book. The idea of hamster power is brilliant. The nasty teacher brings in some tension and the relationship of the family is very true to life. The prose and pace are very good and it's a real page-turner, hard to put down. Wel done.

Being a staunch opposition to the current environmental awareness campaigns (which usually host a bunch of hypocrites telling everyone else to cut back) reading this book about alternative energy generation techniques... I'm actually pleasantly amused. Having only read a few chapters, maybe you went back the traditional line eventually, but this is one of the first environmental books I've read to throw the government out as a solution in the first few pages... in fact government involvement is generally seen as a bigger joke than anything else. Shock of all shocks, an environmental story promoting individuals or even the EVIL companies come up with solutions. Odd of someone to suggest we're all responsible for cleaning up a mess we all made. Really what's great is that, environmental book or no, the major focus of this story appears to be entertainment not lecture. I might even sit through a lecture or two with these characters and tone, it's hilarious. It feels like I'm reading a story based on the old Nic network shows, like Jimmy Neutron or Fairly Odd Parents. The story is light hearted and humorously looks at many of the issue surrounding the environment. I love how even the issue of government hypocrisy concerning their own regulations was brought up in a hilarious way, involving exercising the PM's corgis. You really have a talent for putting a laugh on the issues, and that's a good thing, often it's needed to get people to look at things realistically instead of doing nothing, or panicking. My only complaint was that the much of the narrative moves very quickly from event to event. Like I said, this feels very much like the book version of a late 90s comedy cartoon. It's able to get you to laugh at anything, but the story as a result of being so light hearted, doesn't have much depth. Perhaps that doesn't bother you as not everything needs to be deep, but it is something to think about. I'm sorry for taking so long to get to reading this. If you didn't already read Lost and Found, remember we have a trade. I'll go more in depth on this book if you back me or at least finish my book, thanks in advance.

What a fantastic story line. As a mum I would immediately be drawn to it. Extremely well-written, very funny and thought provoking for both us and our children. The image of granny with her knitting needles had me giggling for ages. Then I thought, " I'm not really the target audience", so I asked my son, who is an avid nine-year-old reader and Xbox player, to see what he thought. He loved it and spent the rest of the evening trying to come up with other ways of generating energy. As a budding footballer he thought he could attach the wires to his foot while he practiced kicking the ball on the garage door, that way he'd improve his football skills while I did the ironing! So congratulations, I think your on to a winner Have a good weekend Aspiring Author

What a fantastic story line. As a mum I would immediately be drawn to it. Extremely well-written, very funny and thought provoking for both us and our children. The image of granny with her knitting needles had me giggling for ages. Then I thought, " I'm not really the target audience", so I asked my son, who is an avid nine-year-old reader and Xbox player, to see what he thought. He loved it and spent the rest of the evening trying to come up with other ways of generating energy. As a budding footballer he thought he could attach the wires to his foot while he practiced kicking the ball on the garage door, that way he'd improve his football skills while I did the ironing! So congratulations, I think your on to a winner Have a good weekend Aspiring Author

A CHIRG review of the opening chapters: A thoroughly charming and well-told tale. Its timely premise provokes reflection on an important issue without preaching or political screed. The pacing is smooth; and the tone light - though never frivolous. The prose is efficient and fresh; and the "first act" well constructed. By chapter 3, the book is hard to put down, and I'll be back to read more. The main characters are likeable and the family dynamic is captured wonderfully in the action and dialogue, with a minimum of bare exposition. Even the minor characters engage with memorable traits, e.g. the tremulous, pallid PM and the officious minor bureaucrat. Best of all was was the hilarious Roald Dahl-esque proposal for the grand-folk at the end of chapter 2. As we hurtle stomach-first towards a seasonal trough of feasts, I was even inspired to turn off the lap-top and go for a run. Highly recommended with several tread-mill-powered stars. Best regards David James Kane The Scattersmith

Hello Debbie, Speedy McCready is amazing. I am really sorry for not reading this amazing book in time and if I had promised to do so in few days. It is original, igniting, challenging and humorous and if it comes to that then a wonderful the way for me keep my weight in check. Well, I hope it gets published soon because for my six and half year old daughter I believe it’ll be too much to read from the computer screen. Love it, on my watch list, high stars and a backing in a few days. Wish you all the very best Himani ‘She Was’

I've deliberately not read any of the prior comments on this one, so... When I read your 'blurb' I thought what a stonking idea for a children's book, and I wished I'd come up with it! The blurb made me chuckle at the thought of what was to come - pure genius! I've read the first few chapters and love the way you instantly throw the reader into the story. The characters are credible and you set up the family unit in the first pages, giving the reader a clear idea of the dynamics. But this is where I felt a tad let down. The dialogue seemed a little too long-winded and this made it lose its authenticity. Humour lies beneath the words, but the wordiness of the manuscript means that this takes on a more serious tone. It should be fun, and I wanted it to be fun and to make me laugh, but it didn't. It felt a little restrained, hemmed in almost. I did enjoy reading it, and as I said, I think the concept is brilliant, but I want more fun, fun, fun!!

CHIRG Review. This is such an original and fun read I kept on with it much longer than I really had time for. All the characers are memorable and have their idiosyncrasies and the plot is truly ingenious. I love the way the Dillon and his family begin to work together to solve their personal energy crisis. Some lovely touches of humour eg: fingers being trodden on when they were trying to get the energy generator into grandad's slippers, and great, realistic dialogue between family members. One small quibble is the nod towards politicians and the royal family, which may or may not be the writer's personal beliefs. I think the story stands better without them. It is certainly too old and informed for a boy of Dillon's age to be aware of and I personally found it off-putting in a children's book. Elizabeth Jasper - 'The Golden Cuckoo'

Return Read-Speedy McCready Debbie, This is such an engaging story. I am up to chapter five, and wanted to comment, mostly because I loved that when Dillon said he had an idea, his whole family stopped to listen. If only every kid had that kind of encouragement. There are other things I loved as well, like the government official explaining that an exercise bike didn't need stabilizers, and Dillon's conniving with his grandfather to get a hamster in the house. This is a gem. Six stars and best wishes. Kate

Excellent work, bravo! Creative, well written, fully developed.

Hi Debbie, You have written an imaginative story in 'Speedy Mc Cready.' I enjoyed reading the first three pages. Good Luck, Carol Jefferies (A Prince Unboyed)

Speedy McCready is in the top 20! Great book for children! I loved the energetic and delightful mouse! Sara Stinson Finger Bones

CHIRG REVIEW SpeedyMcCready/Debbie Roxburgh I've been delightedto see how well Speedy has done, so I finally had time to read the final three chapters and felt very satisfied with the outcome of the Dillon McCready Grid, Dillon who decided he wanted to be a Science teacher and Speedy and Augusta carrying on doing what they do best, but having the assurance that there would be many hamsters to ensure the optimum results from the grid. Thank you for a lovely,well-written story with enough dialogue to make the characters real. I've also updated my original rating and given Speedy very HIGH STARS and decided to back him at least for the rest of this month. All the best with your quest to the editor's desk :-) Maretha African Adventures of Flame, Family, Furry and Feathered Friends

This is really charming. Well written, pacey, good dialogue and entertaining. Good luck with it. Andrea The de Amerley Affair

Hi Debbie! Thanks for checking out my novel. I thought I'd have a look at yours in return! I immediately liked Dillon. A kid that likes science: there's a rarity! Well done for immediately creating a likable protagonist - a very underrated skill! The PM is very nervous about all this... why? Definitely interested in what may or may not be going on here... I love your concept. This is a really good way to make children aware of the possible consequences of energy wasting. I think you've got a very profound underlying moral here. I would only say - perhaps you don't need your first paragraph! You could very easily get straight in there with 'It was two minutes past seven'! Your opening paragraph would probably work well as part of your pitch. Well done, and good luck! Alice 'Solitaire'

Return read: I've read the pitch and am in love with this concept of a hero boy and his hero hamster... chapter 1 I like the irony of the PM announcing tv power cuts via the tv An excellent plan to have people exercise for the soul purpose of being able to watch tv and play video games. talk about dangling the carrot in front of the starving donkey the line about "tablets for my nose" made me picture a man shoving pills in his nose, instead of ingesting them to relieve allergies another thing i found confusing was that the PM said there was enough energy for appliances but Mrs McCready is worried about beef going bad in a fridge that's out of power and not having an oven to cook it in chapter 2 I love the idea of the 8 year old thinking the grandparents would be able to help with the energy... and the mother agreeing is supremely propesterous... love it chapter 3 I've never seen the word "Rota" before and thus I had to ask my hubby... could be North American versus UK culture... he's my UK dictionary when needed... It could just be that I'm an idiot... but perhaps "Timetable" would have been a better choice of word? I also had to ask what "number ten Downing Street" was... My husband laughs at my ignorance but politely explains "the royal telly" and "the ministerial Xbox" made me laugh... or i suppose snigger as you brits say I really like this story... it's very clever and sweet, and what child wouldn't like it... and quite possibly have a greater appreciation for the things we all take for granted high stars Jaclyn x It Never Happened

Debbie, I've just read through chapter 12. Now your story has an excellent villain. Great stuff. Mr. Peabody is really something. Now your readers have someone horrible to root against. And the man is very horrible and disgusting (but fun to read about! kids will love it). Good job! just a few minor typos I noticed along the way: chp. 9 --check this: "...how he was using his using his new pet..." --"Although is has to be said..." it instead of is? chp. 10 --full stop needed in paragraph ending "... that needed homing" --"crammed in with her parent's" ...no apostrophe needed chp. 11 2nd paragraph: "coast as clear" ... was clear?

Speedy McCready A wonderful idea for a story. It’s been made more poignant as I was reading it today because with all the rain and floods we’ve had power cut after power cut. We could have done with a generator of some sort! Anyway, back to the book, it’s very well written and deserves to get to the editors, Can’t find any negative points to make. Charles Knightley The Secret of Netley Abbey

Hello, Debbie. I'm back after reading four more chapters (5-8). There are several bits here I like. The white streak of lightening on Speedy's back is a nice touch, and the interesting complications in the eighth chapter: Speedy learning how to read and the prospect of a hamster girlfriend and family. The plot thickens! And most of all I think young readers will find Speedy's attitude fun to read about. His dramatic delay before showing his stuff in chapter five, and the little extra spurt of sparks near the end of the chapter. This is wonderfully comical and fun to envision. Now a few particulars on grammar and such, the kinds of things folks help me with quite often. In several places, it seems to me you might need a comma for a natural pause before phrases that begin with 'ing' verbals. For example, in chp. 5, how about this: '...warned Grandpa, screwing up his nose...' and in the same chapter: '...for the first few days, taking the time to work out...', and also a comma before 'waving her father good-bye' and also before 'giving a long, slow yawn'. See also in chapter 8: '...added his father, recalling the last time ...' In chapter 5 you write 'baited breath'. It should be 'bated breath', as in breathing that has abated (i.e., slowed or moderated, for the sake of concentration). In chapter 7 there is a missing quote mark leading into one of Grandma's lines: 'The only time those needles... Typo, I think, in this phrase, also from chp. 7: 'until in was more like...' You mean 'it' (meaning the sound of her needling), I believe, instead of 'in'. Occasionally you use semi-colons when only a comma is needed, it seems to me. For example, in chp. 8 in this passage: '...where he would ensure he remained; although Grace did have a point...' Here the semi-colon precedes a dependent clause, which begins with the word 'although'. If you want a pause before or after a dependent clause (one that could not stand by itself as a complete sentence), I've always been told that a comma, not a semi-colon, is what's needed. A semi-colon implies a new independent clause. But this is small stuff. Still enjoying your story. All the best, Jeff McInnis--Betwixt the Trees.

Speedy MaCready- Fabulous, green and well written...Good job...I like that you start out by relating to kids something they all love..free time on the weekend to do what they wish...but then a problem tugs at them and in determining how to solve it, leaves space for their imaginations also...great! CADreilling - The Line

CHIRG review Hi Debbie - what an effective yet simple plot which is really "of its time" and a very good read for your target age group. I was left wanting more by the end. I would encourage you to see if there is mileage in making a series out of this somehow - such good characters should have more than one book to live in! M.P. Jones They Shoot Birds, Don't They?

Tee hee. A great idea for a children's story, Debbie! Your writing is engaging, light-hearted and well-edited. I look forward to reading more :) Helen Glass Dreams

It is a big book for children. Full of actions and laughters. I deal for key stage 2 and 3. Full of encouragements in it for children to encourage their enthusiasts.

I like the idea here a lot. You have a wonderful story for children with a great deal of important information wrapped within that kids don't normally get to hear about. Already here within the first chapter we get pieces of knowledge regarding the idea that electricity comes from somewhere, and that people should get more exercise. And that's all wrapped within what appears to be a rather fun story, meaning kids will actually enjoy learning about these items they don't normally discuss. The writing is solid and I'm sure the story only goes on to be more fun as it progresses. I'm adding you to my watchlist and will be back to read more as time permits.

Hey, Debbie! Here's the review I promised. I really enjoyed your book! I read through chapter 12 then skipped to read the last two chapters. The story and characters are charming. While reading it, I could imagine a room full of children laughing at some of the little comments you made. Just little things like when Dillon's dad is embarrassing him with his dancing, and when Grace shouts, "It's a mouse!" There were lots of these moments that made me smile. I have very little to criticize. There are a few typos through the first couple chapters and a few further in (just missing letters and periods, nothing a spell-check couldn't find I think). The only other thing I would say is that, for me, chapter 11 seemed to break in flow. Before that chapter, the paragraphs are very short and blunt, and for some reason, that chapter felt a bit clumpier. I'm surprised no one has picked this book up for publishing! I would have loved this story as a kid, and the premise is genuinely original. Glad to see you're so high in the ranks now; you deserve it! Good luck! AB Kline The Key Maker

This is huge fun. Love the gentle humour and the eco-message. There are maybe some bits that could do with tightening up - do you ever read your stuff out loud? It can help to find the bits that snag. The other thing that jarred a little are lines like 'like most ten-year old boys' - I think it's a convention in children's literature that you don't talk down in any way... you kind of keep inside the ten year old POV (without letting the adult perspective take over). And children always think of themselves as pretty grown-up, even when they're ten, or eight, or six. Talking down to younger siblings is, of course, quite all right. :) Love the idea of grandparent power - that tickled me. And loved the bits where you segue into hamster POV. I read up to Chapter Nine and really enjoyed it. Only thing - I was sort of waiting for a problem to hit in; for an antagonist to come up. When I think about other stories for this age-group, there is usually a fly in the ointment, a problem to be overcome. Something to up the ante. It doesn't have to be a mega supervillain for this age range, but someone who looks like he or she will foil the plans. Just a thought. Highly starred and will back when I get a chance... My list of books needing backing is growing. But I like to leave titles on my shelf for a decent amount of time. SO please bear with me.

Debbie, I've added your book to my watchlist. It looks great fun! Helen

Always looking for a good children's book to suggest and this would be a good one! If this were ever published I would recommend it to all my parents. Very talented and quite nice flow and prose. The idea behind this book is certainly in a league of its own! Hopefully green thinking like this will be our way of life when today's kids read books like this and grow up into responsible adults. Thanks for contributing to the future minds :)

Debbie, This is a fantastic book! As a Teacher Librarian at a secondary/high school I am fairly familiar with what preteens and teens love to pick up and this book definitely has an audience. Right off the bat the first sentences of the first chapter grab your attention with regards to time running out! Your last sentence of the first chapter makes you want to read more. As I read on I see you have thought about that for all of your chapters. Teens are going to love this! It's interesting in this day and age of teen interest in dystopian novels like Article 5, The Hunger Games of course and Divergent etc., I like that you give us a taste of a different world within our own yet with a humorous twist! The Prime Minister, even though greatly disliked, seems pathetic but in a hilarious way. I can picture him very clearly in my minds eye. In addition, in the beginning of Chapter 3 I laughed out loud when I read about the sister on the bike and nearly killing herself so her brother can play his game! I also like that the minute the government message is digested by the family you can immediately start to think about what being without power for the luxuries would be like (and how very real this concern is in our world). This is the part I like the best. The issue of using less power or the prospect of not having power in the future is one that a person young or old can relate too and think about. I think this is a positive thing teens should think about along with a way to deal with this! A great read! Jodi Cardillo

This is the first children's book I have read on this site (I only joined 2 days ago!) and I am absolutely blown away by its quality. As my own book is from this genre it is brilliant to be able to get an insight into others' styles and plotting. I have to say that your prose is crisp and clean and cracks along at a great pace. You handle characters and dialogue beautifully. The family are supportive yet still bicker giving it a very 'real' but charming flavour. I love the premise and it is very much of our time and I can see this being cherished by any school or class dealing with climate change or environment issues. A perfect way for teachers to stimulate discussion and the imaginations of their pupils. Actually really struggling to think of any major criticism. Perhaps too focussed on the UK..? Well done! Where can I read your other published books? Mawdlin The Witches' Cauldron

Hi Debbie, Here for my return read at last. I confess I have no idea how to review childrens fiction, but it seems to me that this should be highly entertaining for kids of quite a wide age range - I certainly enjoyed it, big kid that I am. the premise is great - and topical. I was immediately hooked by the idea. Here in SA we have for the last two winters suffered frequent and long deliberate power cuts in order conserve electricity, as our grid is no longer able to meet demand. We now have a very funny television advert where the family are all in the lounge, mum watching soaps on tv, kids playing xbox, while Dad madly pedals the excercise bike hooked up to cables with labels for each apliance on them - so I could picture this absolutely perfectly as I was reading! Dillon and Grace are such typical syblings - I think you have created two very lively characters here. The response of the adults to the situation, and your characterisation of them through their reactions, is very well done. It made me laugh to read that both kids and adults were sulking! This reads fluently, with some wonderful decriptive touches that add more depth to the prose- e.g. “...a bleary-eyed day peered through a chink in the curtains...” - fantastic description, love it. The one thing that was a small hitch for me was the use of the word 'hazy' twice within a short span in the opening of chp 1 - fine for the PM on the TV, but it struck me that if all power was out at around 7pm in November in the UK, it would be dark as a pothole, so that Dillon wouldn’t be able to see his father even as a hazy outline. “He(,) who does not pedal(,) will not have enough power....” The commas aren't needed here. Overall, I found this most enjoyable, and I think it will definitely have great appeal for kids - all the best with it! Kim The Seventh Gate

CHIRG Review Debbie, this is brilliant! And so on the money, what with the Government dithering about which way to go with regards future power. And time really is running out on the whole decision-making process. We've often joked as a family about wiring our exercise bike up so that we can power our computer (one sits next to the other). Your writing style is great: fluid and spare. Just what is needed in a story like this. Strong characterisation: real and likeable, yet flawed characters. And some cracking plotlines developing. I loved the lavendar candles - don't we all have a few of those lurking in our cupboards! One tiny niggle (but I might have missed something), if the fridge is back working, wouldn't the lighting also come back on? Although my grasp of electricity and the national grid isn't brilliant, I have to admit. I've only read the first 3 chapters so far, but will definitely be back to read the rest. Wishing you success with this, it deserves it. Eva H Children of the Raven

Hi Debbie, sorry for the delay. My husband's surgery went well. Thanks for asking. I have to admit this isn't my genre but I didn't see it as a child's book- more adult/literary. It opens in a great spot- Dillon is watching tv when it suddenly stops, revealing a few health warnings from officials and a message from the PM. When I was reading it I could see it as a movie, I could picture the scene perfectly! This is quite an original story and idea. With power being so expensive now (in Australia) and I'm sure over the world, this plot is very topical, and it makes me think if what the National Grid is implementing, it might come true in the future.  As previous readers have mentioned Dillon does remind me to of Charlie Bucket, whom I think a lot of kids can relate too. Story wise I couldn't find any plots holes and the writing is fluid and easy to read. Little Grace has great character development and I look forward to see her grow within the novel. I loved the scene when Dillon is playing the Xbox and poor Grace has to power it. It is so something my husband would make me do!  As I read chapter 3, I almost got a sense of a end of the world vibe- citizens are flogging it out while the rich and the government are rolling in electricity. I really enjoyed Speedy McCreedy and I hope you get it published soon.

Debbie, Sorry it's taken me so long, but got a chance to dip into your Speedy McCready. I've had time to read the first four chapters tonight and quite happy to have done so! This is a charming tale so far. The whole idea of the National Grid coming up short, and families having to do what they can to generate their own power: funny from the start. I thought your first scene in chapter one, the prime minister making his announcement on TV, was very effective. His mannerisms and goofy grin, and the wee extra message from the minister of health before the TV shuts down completely--great stuff! It seems to me that many children are going to find this delightful. The idea of hooking Grandpa and Grandma up to the battery too, and then Dillon's idea with the hamster. It reminds me a bit of my nervous little dachshund's outrageously energetic tail when I was a kid. I don't remember a waking moment of hers when it wasn't wagging away at super-turbo speed. That thing could have powered cities. I'm looking forward to seeing how Dillon's hamster fares! All the best, Jeff -- Betwixt the Trees

CHIRG Review: Hi Debbie, I've returned to read a bit more of Speedy. I think it would be helpful to take advantage of the Chapter 'title' function. Especially for Children's fiction, I'd expect most kids enjoy imaginative Chapter headings. I'm sure I previously read upto Chapter 4, so bear with me, as I'll edit my comment as I go, just to be clear. If Dillon nodded off just after midnight would he be aware that his head had been spinning? I like the image of Dillon's hair standing on end when he gets a good idea. You make a nice connection between his school hamster keeping him awake and the hamster wheel. Dillon's idea seems rather intricate in its design stage. I did wonder why it took him ten minutes to jot down his ideas, and then, in the next paragraph you mention The Would Be Scientist. There's a neat closing paragraph regarding his hamster dilemma. I think most parents try to teach their kids the responsibility of having a pet to look after (in most cases, so they don't have to themselves). Chapter 5 does skip forward a bit. I would have been interested to read about Dillon's conversation with his Grandpa. Instead, his Grandparents turn up with something in a cage. You have a typo - kept instead of KEEP him awake. You also make a remark about washing up and hot water consumption. Wouldn't water run on gas? Dillon's character reminds me a little of Charlie Bucket, very bright, innocent, and a bit naive. I love how his father yells "Brilliant!" then disappears for work. Your lead up to the end of the Chapter, with Speedy making the family wait before he runs, is excellent. As is 'a mini electrical storm around the rims of his wheel.' Really fun. I can't add much more, except to say this is nicely written, nicely paced, and a genuinely fun read. It's inventive enough (as a story) to answer all of its own questions; the Characters are well drawn, and the dialogue is easy to follow. I'm curious to find out how Speedy solves what appears to be a nationwide electricity crisis. Great stuff! Ben - Franky Frog's Worldwide Travelogue

Hi Debbie, CHIRG Review and return-read I really love the name of your book (especially as a children's book - I can easily imagine my children asking to read Speedy McCready)! Your characters are well established from the beginning, and this creates an intimate bond between the reader and your novel's protagonist. Great writing style - simple and practiced, but it has a fantastic edge to it that reminds me of Enid Blyton. You might think of opening with something that is more gripping, shocking or mysterious. An opening that precedes the plot and lets the reader know that something great is going to change sometime in the next pages. I also want to say try pick up the pace, but then my own novel is slow-paced and equally similar in the opening - so I have no sway there. Awesome work and great story! Best regards,

C.S Lewis once said, "A children's story that can only be enjoyed by children, is not a good children's story at all." Let me be one of many to reiterate to you, this is a FANTASTIC children's story. I love your characters especially. Excellent writing here. God bless

Hi Debbie, I came back to read more and like my first experience, it's pure fun! Congrats and all the best to Speedy McCready! D :)

Debbie First of all, I love the name of this book and the character's names as well. The story is perfect for children and it really ranks high up there with imagination and creativity. There are some things I noticed that are just more or less grammar questions for me. Can a person start sentences with the word 'and'? I always thought it was a conjunction word. I could be wrong. I am not perfect at grammar by any means. Its a wonderful story! I'm going to five star rate this story! I love it!

What a delightful read. I love the creative thoughts within the minds of the children.. Also the UK govt's idea of solving a power outage.. Love your concepts... Can completely see this growing into a movie of the week type thing on the Children's stations.... I hope there are future books in the working ...thank you , 5 stars! the Gypsy Mermaid Sharing Smiles and Giggles

This is a CHIRG review: This is a really interesting and fun concept, and it seems quite timely with the economy being the way it is. You have a delightful writing voice, and I think you have a terrific way with words, like “water dripping from the tip of his ski slope nose.” The three chapters I read were quite funny as well, and I couldn't help but laugh when Dillon's sister suggests using the grandparents as a power source. I enjoyed the social and political commentary, as well, though I imagine most of it will go over kids' heads. The only tiny suggestion I have is that I didn't think the commas were necessary in “dark, brown hair” or “large, brown envelope.” I thought it was thoroughly charming, and I'm sure it will only get more entertaining once Speedy joins the cast. Mike What, the Elf?

I happy to see Speedy McCready getting close to the top 20. Good luck! Sara

Hi Debbie, got a chance to read some of your book. What an interesting idea that kids will love. The flow is gentle and takes you through the process of from idea to having power, sweet. Good luck with this.

Love love love love it. What a unique and original story/concept. Bag of stars n made my bookshelf! -Sheri "Scooter Goes North"...only about a ten minute read and chapter two is a rewrite. Please take a look if u have a moment and back if you like. Thanks for the great read and hopefully your support of Scooter :)

Hi I really enjoyed your writing. The idea is clever and really modern. Something that children and adults will relate to. I did pick up on a few things that I would change - but these are just my opinion! I would change hay fever attack to allergy attack When they talk about their undeniably gifted son, there could maybe be some examples of what he's done that are gifted before that - e.g the bit about him being a nutty little professor is later on. Plus most eight year olds can ride a bike without stabilisers - my five year old can and I don't think he's an exception. The whole concept is so original though, it was great to read and I will read more - but only got to ch6 cause then it was tea time in our house. Gemma - author of Game Over

I started by reading the first chapter to my son at bedtime. He is only six but he has a high listening and comprehension level and we normally read stories like this, a chapter per night, at bedtime. He loved it! He said, "can you read more tomorrow, please? I want to know how they are going to get the electricity!" It's fresh and original and with a splash of humour that I've no doubt this book is a winner!! I loved the Dad and his dripping nose! Dillon is a very believable and likeable mc that I am sure most children will be able to identify with. Can't wait to read more to my son tomorrow!

I really like this book and had to smile at the idea of Grandma being wired up to the battery as she knitted. This is a charming story but also thought provoking and I can see it becoming a classic. I'm backing it. Thanks for a very good read.

Hi Debbie, I think you need to keep this idea under lock and key or we will see it implemented in our own lives over here in the USA. Seriously if our President read your book, I'm certain there will be an Executive Order go out requiring all households to generate their own electricity....or maybe not. But the book is a great book. I have 6 grandchildren and four of them are old enough to read to. I'd love reading this to them. Speedy McCready is a great character as are Dillon and Grace. The story is light hearted on important subjects and that give it great value. It is a good book for kids. I liked Dillon right off as a bright child with great attitude. I don't have much to comment on your writing because it flowed very well and it very visual and descriptive and it crosses the ocean well for out market here. Paul Richards The Fourth Kind

Awesome- how did you even come up with this idea? I was waiting till tomorrow to read this, but then I started last night and had to go back to it today. Very easy read and I like the themes at work and the classical irony embedded in the plot. I will read this to my five year old daughter! Great imagery- Love "as mini-brainwaves zapped around his head like shooting stars". Not sure if this was an error in the beginning it states "so leant across", perhaps it should be "so he leant across". The work is very clean otherwise and just a really good message. You are on my shelf!

CHIRG Review Well, Dillon is a riveting main character, what else could I say? Hm, the hamster is equally amazing! The book is fun, educational, and absolutely good for kids. I like the fact that you focused on highlighting virtues without boring your readers. The idea of a hamster being one of the heroes of the book is cute and smart. Dillon and Speedy's interactions are always enjoyable. It is something one could read again and again but not get tired with it. I wish you all the best with it. You're very close to the ED, and I can't wait to hear what Harper says about the book. Thank you again for reaching out. Rated 6 stars. D - Leo & Rover: The Purple Marble Adventures

Hi Debbie, A nice idea and a good telling. I have thoroughly enjoyed reading it. You have edited it well and are obviously very accomplished. it deserves to be published. Thanks for letting me know about CHIRG, I will have a look. Best regards Steve 'Merlin's Cave'

Fun topic, creative and thought provoking.

I really enjoyed this book, with its believable and humourous dialouge and characters. I would definately recommend this book to the younger members of my family.

An interesting and novel idea! A great way of getting children to think about energy and fitness. I'm sure children would love this idea and this book. I wish you all the best with getting it to the editors desk. Best wishes Rachael Dreamscape

Hi Debbie, this is a really sweet idea you've got here. A very original starting point for a kids book that I guess a lot of young ones would be interested in. Six stars for now and I hope to give you some space on my shelf at the end of the month. Cheers!

Debbie, I finally got around to yours, and I am so glad that I did. This is SO good. I read the first three chapters and will definitely come back for more. It's humorous, insightful, and almost even believable. I absolotely love it. Unfortunately, I have no useful critique/comments to share. Even after three chapters, you are backed on my shelf. Keep up the great work. I wish you the best. Please come check out mine sometime. Thanks, -Chris Fugitives from Northwoods

Hi, I am enjoying reading Speedy McCready. I am going to put it on my watchlist to read later. 6 stars also. If you get a moment you might dip into "The bed next to mine" Thank you, Alice Barron.

It's amazing the deep and complex themes that are being introduced into children's books these days. But as I just commented on another children's book, the age group appeal has been blurred for some very successful works. Guess we just need to give out personal inspiration the best shot and not bother ourselves unduly about the market. Thanks for the opportunity to come this way AGAIN.

Hi, This is a really fun read. I'm just starting but the premise has already convinced me to read everything in this story. Its a unique and entertaining piece while also giving the kids some inputs on the importance of electric power. From somebody in the Philippines, (we have very consistent brownouts and a looming power shortage problem) this story can give us a lot of practical inputs as well...all while having fun, hehehehe... Anyway, a few words of suggestion: When the first interruption came, you might want to have the television flicker for a few times first before the complete blackout and the appearance of the PM, this will create an added tension and suspense for Dillon while putting your reader at the edge of their seats (well, if they are sitting)... Also, you might want to take out the description of what the sister was doing upstairs with the nail varnish, I thought is read weird and we were talking about what was happening with the kid downstairs after all... But all in all, a very good beginning and hoping to read more of this... This work stays on my Watchlist and might go to my bookshelf one of these days... Hope you can take a little time to put THIRD on your watchlist, read and tell me what you think... and if you like it, maybe a backing... Thank you very much...

[QUOTE] CHIRG Speedy McCready A lot of fun, Debbie! Can I be churlish and point out an inconsistance at the beginning of ch3? Grace has been pedalling for 45mins then she has been pedalling for half-an-hour ;o) But really well done, I enjoyed the read immensely ~ like all good humour: it merely stretches reality just a little. Hope you make it to the ED. Oh! High stars and a place on my shelf. Rob Lawrence [ENDQUOTE] Rob - thank you very much for your comments. Just to clarifty the 45 minutes and then the 30 minutes - Grace did the 45 mins to help her mother and the 30 to help Dillon. Debbie

CHIRG Speedy McCready A lot of fun, Debbie! Can I be churlish and point out an inconsistance at the beginning of ch3? Grace has been pedalling for 45mins then she has been pedalling for half-an-hour ;o) But really well done, I enjoyed the read immensely ~ like all good humour: it merely stretches reality just a little. Hope you make it to the ED. Oh! High stars and a place on my shelf. Rob Lawrence

Loved it! have rated highly and will add to WL as soon as space. Sue 'It's a Dog's Life'

From one Debbie to another. CHIRH review. This is really a very nice tale and very well written. The only thing I'd change in the first two chapters that I've read is the italics for dialogue. You don't need it when you have speech marks -it's one or the other or so my editor for Pick n Mix Mums told me. Best of luck with this. I'm backing it for now Debbie Richardson Pick n Mix Mums (shortlisted for Kelpies Award) Princess Haggis Ears The Lightning Tree

Dear Debbie, We have 5 kids at home (4 boys and a girl). I read them and the remained silent... you know what it means ;) Amazing! Thank you for sharing!

This has a great premise, Debbie. It is clever and funny and a very enjoyable read. Personally, I'd like to see it more firmly rooted in Dillon's POV. Having different pov's is fine and omniscient is fine, but it should be clear when the pov changes. (Don't get me wrong - I'm not a member of the writing police - I'm merely expressing my own difficulties in floowing the thread. For instance, in C1 I thought I was in Dillon's pov. How could he know that millions of kids were staring at their tv's in shock? Of course, he could imagine it, in which case it's better put that way. I had the same issue with what Mr McReady and Grace were doing upstairs. The pov issue is my only nit and it's easily sorted if you care to. As I said, it's a very enjoyable read with a great premise and some very funny ideas. I'm thinking of getting a battery store and the in-laws round. High stars from me and the very best of luck. I reckon you can make it with this. Mike (Milk and More)

Really like this book! Very much in the vein of Michael Rosen, Allan Ahlberg etc. Really clever charaterisation too. Excellent! Mike The Bad Teacher

CHIRG Sorry it took so long for me to review! I think this is excellent! You may be on to something here... I read the first four chapters and I am impressed. I'm looking at this story as something that could really happen. I think if we were really in this situation where we had to excercise to power our T.V.'s, the world would be a better place. I love how you make Dillion and Grace so articulate(is that the right word?) at only eight and ten. I like the part where Dillion is playing his game and Grace is riding the bike to power it and gives in to her leg cramps. And I also like how the father us initially taking the news that they have to excercise to watch T.V. pretty hard. I am immediately drawn to your characters because they are so realistic (i.e., the mother telling Grace she'll give her fifteen minutes on the bike so she could watch her show... It shows really shows a mother making a sacrifice for her child's happiness.) This is a great start and I wish you the best. There is one more spot left on my bookshelf and it now belongs to you! Best, Daylin Eaton The Chronicles of Tyson Jenkins: the Witch Sisters

CHIRG Debbie I read your first three chapters and then dived in at random to validate my thinking. I like your premise - it's fun and focuses on problem solving. And I don't see any problems with your characterization, pacing, or humour. However, I do want to point out a couple of issues with your writing style. First, I think you are a little heavy handed with your commas. For example, I reckon there is one, possibly two unnecessary commas in the first line of your second paragraph. And I am not sure that you need the commas around "the length or breath of the country" either. I noticed this problem throughout my random dives into your text so I strongly recommend you consider a good comma-based edit. I think it's important that a book for children takes great pains to do this kind of thing properly. Second, I think there are some phrases here that can be slimmed down or otherwise made more elegant. The first to catch my eye was your description of the Prime Minister: "His face began twitching in a rat-like manner". Reading it outloud, it does scan nicely, but it's still a little clumsy and, based on your writing elsewhere, I know you can do better. He twitched rattishly? Twitching like a rat, he forced ..." He forced an uncomfortable smile onto his twitching ratty face? My advice here is the same that I always give out - read your pages out loud and where you stumble or think "Oh my!", those are the places that still need a little fine tuning. I hope this helps at least a little. Evie

Happy to place your work on my shelf! Good luck to you. Hope you have a chance to take a look at Dark Side by CC Brown. 61BBboy

Hey Debbie - this is FUN! It's been a while since I've read anything in this genre and have really enjoyed it. I'll actually pass it onto my nieces to read - they're about the age this is aimed at. It'd be interesting to hear what they have to say ... in the mean time, well done. It's highly rated!! Richard Author: M

CHIRG review Hi Debbie, I've read through the first three chapters of "Speedy McCreedy" and I think you've got a great premiss here. The story is fresh and interesting. The chapter lengths are perfect - short enough to not frustrate your 8-10 year old audience. I hope you won't mind if I give you a couple thoughts. Take them or leave them. - Though I enjoyed your story, it took until chapter 3 for it to really grab me. I think the two chapters might be written a bit old for your audience in general. The first line of chapter 1 was good, but I think you lost my interest a bit when the P.M. and health authority started to speak. Perhaps it might help to bring it down to the level of the readers and find a way to say everything they say with less words. - I didn't really feel like Dillon and Grace talked their age until chapter 3. Their dialogue was a bit too old. - I wonder if the reaction to the announcement was a bit too passive. I would have expected more of an outburst from everyone, except perhaps from Mrs. McCreedy, who seems to be a very mellow, soft-spoken person. Overall, I think the story is definitely likeable. I love stories where children are creative to solve a problem. It reinforces creativity and problem solving for your young audience. Your characters are likeable. Kids everywhere will connect with them. High stars and kept on my watchlist. Lynn Surviving Sunset

Hi, Your story is interesting. There are several instances where commas are misplaced or altogether absent, which interrupts the flow for the reader. For example, there are two of these in the "With a little expertise" and the "They'll give us overall" paragraphs in chapter 16. Rules of thumb: no comma between subject and verb, and a comma to separate a subordinate from a main clause (And if SS needs more power, gates C and D will...). For the sentence in brackets, removing the comma makes it sound as if Silver Street needs more power gates. Overall, I think your book would be very appealing to children. The action unfolds quickly, the level of language is appropriate and the tone positive. I will be rating it highly. I think copy editing the book very carefully would make it publishable. I would buy it. Greg

Hi Debbie, I have only gotten up to Chapter 7 but I want to let you know that aside from a very clever and imaginative story line, your writing is quite excellent. The characters are believable and well drawn out, especially Grace and Dillon. Excellent job.

Yours is an indeed interesting premise, and looks like it might attract older readers. It has taken me longer than I expected to get to your work, for reason beyond my control. I am just leaving this early comment as I take a peek. I hope to write something more detailed soon. Thanks for the offering and the opportunity to look at this.

Hello Debbie, I have read up to chapter 4. This is only third book I have looked at since joining up today. The tone of your book is approrpriate for children. The squabbles between the brother and sister were believable. I will be back to read more later. Greg (I translated a book by author Michel J.. Lévesque, and the listing of the book, Alter Business, is under his name)

A wonderful imaginative story! I highly rated it. Great descriptions and humor. I know my children would love this story! Jenny Hailey Graham and the Secrets of the Cobalt Eye

I love the premise of this idea and managed (after a great deal of trouble with the site) to read only 2 chapters. I would love to have read more but the site won't allow the chapters to download properly and is becoming so slow it is almost asleep! This isn't just a problem with you, I've noticed it is with many of the books on here. Authonomy please take note. However, this is well-written and I feel would appeal to adults and children alike. I immensely enjoyed what I read and hope one day to be able to finish it - perhaps when it is in print, as I love this idea - reminds me of childhood in the 70's! :-) Highly starred and I will keep it on my WL to back as soon as I can. Well done, Debbie! Best wishes, Natalie (The Diary of John Crow)

Swap :) I must say, this story is quite charming. It is age appropriate, funny, but also has a very intriguing plot. I loved Speedy’s attitude! The opening was very catchy and pulled the reader in. The book is well paced and the chapters are just the right size. The main characters are smart, but still imaginative. I see why this book has such high ratings! I don’t really have anything critique-y to say at all. I have made a couple of grammatical notes, but nothing big. You may have already caught them and didn’t feel like uploading a fixed chapter. Chapter 3 - Dillon was perched at the end of HIS bed. It says this bed, but I assume you meant his. Chapter 5 – Young lady,” said her mother, - The comma is in mothe,r right now. Chapter 9 – Although IT had to be said that the teacher – I think it’s supposed to say it instead of is Overall, I loved it! I see this book doing very well in the future! Toney/Growing Amaranth

Hi there, So i've just finished chapter 4, and can't wait to read the rest. Will Dillon get his hamster and will the project he's working on work? This is a book i would most definately buy this for my child (once i have one that is) or niece/nephew. Very well done, i look forward to reading more. Karl.

What can I say, the few chapters I've read are very interesting, I even laughed a few times with the story, it's funny and it invites you to keep reading. I'll make sure to complete all of it as soon as I can...

Really interesting idea with appealing dialogue and rather timely with all the energy debate linked nicely to lack of exercise in most people's lives. Only managed a couple of chapters as bit busy, but enjoying it so far!

Good idea for a children's book. I was confused as to some things, like would how would Dillon know that did millions of children and adults gave a "united cry of alarm?" As well as how did Mr. McCready know about the PM's announcement when he was in the shower. I think that the parents and Grace, who I am assuming is his sister, could do with a better introduction. I only got up to Chapter 1 but will get back to read more.

It is easy to read but then, as a children's book, it should be. I read through chapter 7 before I ran out of time. I enjoyed it and hope I have time to get back to it. Matt Brennesholtz Orphan of Greenwich Village

Such an adorable tale!! The whole family including Speedy are so lively. I love how this touches on a very relevant subject of energy conservation and how reliant we all are on electricity. A good solid read for any young reader. I could see this story in school library shelves world wide! Dearest regards, Sharrie "Berry"

I think this manuscript is a great example of a well-written children’s story. The characters are nicely written with their own little quirks to flesh them out a bit and the idea behind the story is really interesting and would be thought-provoking for any child. One of the main reasons I think this works so well is because of the language you use. The lexis and grammar – I believe – would be easily understandable for children without being too simplistic. I’m a firm believer that a successful children’s stories make reading fun whilst, at the same time, allowing the child to improve their vocabulary and contextual understanding. Any of the words that are slightly more complex can be worked out through the immediate context without taking away from the story. Good luck with getting onto the ED. I’d be really happy to see Speedy McCready there.

I can see how kids would love this adventure. Reminds me of the 70s and the power cuts. A well-written piece, Debbie.

I'm two chapters in and it is a delightful premise! I want to read more just to see if the snooty government officials and the people who make the television programs have to pedal for their own power or is it just the people like the McCreadys who have to peddle. :) Thanks, Joe Brooks City of Refuge

Debbie, The premise alone grabbed my attention, how peculiar and novel!? I really like your originality. I imagine a lack of electricity would strike a powerful cord with children today! I think your writing style is dead right for the genre, it is simple, effective, to the point and easy to follow. You don't make your reader wait for the story and I think that is crucial in a children's book. It's no wonder you're at 29! Good luck and best wishes, Laura Beneath The Blossom Tree

Great book, I got into it straight away, your easy reading style reminds me of my own. I need to read the rest as Im only a little way through. Alls great so far! :))

I just finished the first chapter and it is such a delightful story! Kids might learn a lesson from this story, too! I think my little sister would enjoy this story very much. :) I can't wait to meet Speedy! :D ~Lina Dying Hearts http://www.authonomy.com/books/46120/the-hearts-of-archirind-book-one-dying-hearts/

My very first thoughts were that this seemed rather sudden, I would have expected much more build up to such a development - however I then reminded myself that this is for children and they are very much more likely to go with the flow and focus in on the Prime Minister blowing his nose on his sleeve. The writing is very polished and I like the interaction between your characters it seems very natural and the scented candles were a particularly neat touch as that is something that has probably happened to quite a few people. I did wonder how the fridge was still humming when they were all sitting in the dark. The fathers reliance on the government to sort it was quite amusing but again possibly mainly from my adult perspective. I think that you could make even more of the trade off within the family as that is something that I think will appeal to the more scientifically minded children. I am thinking here about my older grandson who would want to know who was powering the television stations and so on. In fact I would really play with that idea much more but of course this is very much your lovely story and you must take everything I say with a pinch of salt , I comment only as a reader and in an effort to maybe help out here and there. I do think that one thing about this is that it may actually make one or two children realise that electricity is not something to be taken for granted as a never ending resource and that can only be a good thing. I may have missed it but is there somewhere that says that, apart from the exercise bike other forms of electricity generation can be coupled to the battery stores, because otherwise the ideas about Granny and Granddad don't really fit in very well. As I say I may have missed that and if so I apologise. When you have the family gathered at the breakfast table you have a little contradiction in there you say that they stop eating and drinking but when Dillon makes his announcement Grace nearly spits her orange juice across the room - I know from painful experience with my grandsons that they will pick up on that sort of thing in an instant. I would have liked to read a little about the build up of the relationship between the boy and the hamster. He is willing his new pet to climb into the wheel - this to me gives an indication that there is some sort of connection between them but all we have been told is that he has spent three nights in his room working out how the hamster can generate electricity. I think it would be nice to witness some of that. It's a cute story and I think it carries an important message hidden away there. I do think that at times the logic lets it down. I wonder how many children you have tested it out on. I found there input invaluable when I was writing mine. I think that this little story is a good idea and I see that it has already reached quite high in the rankings. Very good luck with it. Diane

A return read I have re-read the first five chapters and carried on through to Chapter Ten. This is shaping up to be a lovely story, perfect for young children. It has an original idea at its heart. I like the introduction of the rather nasty teacher in Ch 9 - always good to have an evil character lurking somewhere and I guess he's going to be playing a major part in the story from now on. Just a couple of comments so far - apologies if they repeat what others have already mentioned. Ch 6 The start of this chapter feels a little disconnected from Ch 5 where we have the idea of using the hamster to generate power. We then skip back to the knitting needles and slippers with Grace saying she is a genius. This needs to be tinkered with - it would be more logical if Dillon is called the genius at this point or take out that sentence. Ch 8 'But why would be want more hamsters?' Should be we? This is a well-crafted story and I enjoyed the read. All the best with it. Julia Shadow Jumper

CHIRG review Speedy McCready Hi Debbie I have just finished the first 8 chapters of Speedy McCready and I had a quick peek at the last chapter, which remained as good as the first, and here are my comments. I was completely taken by your tale and the ease with which your writing draws the reader along. It is beautifully age appropriate whilst being clever enough to be enjoyed by the adult who will hopefully be bending the pages of a paper back reading this to their kids of an evening. I loved your characters, Dillon and Grace and their family, and of course Speedy himself. Each character has a good voice and the dialogue works so well. The ideas you have used are imaginative and fun some of those I particularly liked were: In case of power cuts it is best not to use lavender scented candles Using the grandparents knitting and foot tapping to generate power I loved the description of the sparks and the electrical storm as Speedy McCready took to the wheel for the first time Grace and Dillon worrying about blowing up their grandparents The idea of Grandpa and Mr McCready becoming a Strictly Come Dancing pair, was also a nice image, Wellington boots and all. I am not a great one for spotting errors and to be fair I couldn’t see any except for the following. After Dillon explains his idea to the family, Mrs McCready says, ‘Don’t be so quick to judge young lady,’ said her mothe,r, you have a comma in the word mother. Excellent read and 6 stars. D.J The Ghost Shirt

Quite an enjoyable read and easy to follow. A thought crossed my mind - perhaps we could have followed the family struggling to keep up with the bike riding before they started coming up with ideas to solve the problem. Lots of comical visuals for the kids so well done. Good luck!

Hi Debbie, Thank you for inviting me to have a look at your book. All I can say is that it is very cute. I read three or four chapters of it and I enjoyed the dialogue very much. I must say that 21,253 words is a lot of words for a child. But then, it depends on what you mean by children. Keep up the good work. Murasaki

Hi, Thanks for the invitation to read your book. I have read chapter one, and have included some thoughts and suggestions below. Over all, I liked the concept of the story, and there were a few great lines in there, particularly, ‘…they’d give the PM a few pills to swallow, and hey, presto, he’d be back on the road to recovery.’ :) Here are a few things to consider. They are purely my opinion, so feel free to ignore anything you disagree with. There seemed to be a few POV shifts in the story. For example, the chapter starts off in the MC’s POV, as we get a feel for who he is and some insight into his thoughts. Then in the middle of the second paragraph, the POV suddenly changes to a very general one where we are told what children around the country are doing and thinking. Also, later, when the lights go out, we are told what his little sister is thinking (about the nail polish). These are not huge deals, but some people find sudden shifts like this distracting. I also thought the PM‘s dialogue could read smoother. Perhaps, ‘I would like to inform you…’ I thought ‘….the most unnatural manner,’ sounds pretty formal in comparison to the easy, relaxed tone you set in the text at the beginning. I wasn’t sure about the wording here: ‘…for creating the bulk…’ Perhaps, ‘every household is now responsible for compensation for excess usage,’ or something? I was also a little unclear as to how dark it was when the lights actually went out. When the father and sister come down the stairs, they are described in such a way that I thought they could be seen. Then the mother comes along with a torch. Again, not a big thing, but clarifying these points might settle unnecessary questions your reader might ask. This is a nice beginning to your story. I can see why many people are enjoying it. I wish you continued success with it. :) All the best, Dyane The Purple Morrow

A great idea for a children's story and one with a very positive message. I like the educational aspects of your book, teaching youngsters about the National Grid but also asking them to think more about where electricity comes from and why it should be produced in a more eco friendly way. Your depiction of the Prime Minister I found to be highly amusing and life like. I think the idea of using hamsters to produce electricity is nothing short of genius! Wish it could be done for real. My step daughter loves any stories with animals in so this would certainly appeal to her. It is well written and suitable for children of all ages to be enjoyed and absorbed. Stephen Chasing Shadows

This is brilliant, my two younger children would love it. I hope you get it published.

A thoroughly interesting read. I love the fact that this a unique idea because it gives it that wonderful sense of originality. My only criticism (if you could call it that) would be the small number of typos I noticed. Still, a fantastic read and backed by me for sure. Sharlotte Caine (Currently in the planning stages of two books.)

This was a fun, delightful read. I think I'll get a bumper sticker, "Hamster Power." (lol) Good language, good flow, entertaining, and yet . . . it makes one think. Imagine all the power we'd need for being on autho :)) Very nice! Hgh stars on this one from me, Debbie :) Donna No Kiss Good-bye (The story of a fourteen-year old escaping communist Romania along switchbacks that eventually led to America).

Hi Debbie, Just finished the first chapter, and i must say i am intrigued as to how the McCready's are going to power their house now that the nasty prime minister has let them down... Nicely written, interesting characters right from the start. I think this will have to go on my watchlist. Four stars, i think. Thanks for letting me read, Richard Langridge

What a timely book, and written with such a great pace! We expect to have electricity cut every week this summer, and I just wished this book had been out in the shops now! R The Forest of Vulcanus

Wow. It's sad to think the government would get ot where they cut off all electricity. Hope Dillon finds a way to create it

Hi Debbie, I picked up in chapter 5 today, and reafirmed my love of your delightful story! There is so much action and adventure on these pages. You have a winner here... no doubt! :) All the best, ~Faith

Chirg. Hi Debbie sorry I haven't got in touch before now. I Read and Rated your book some time ago, but my computer was playing up at the time and I lost track of who I had replied to and those I didn't. Hope you'll forgive me. Anyway I have put you on my shelf in an effort to help you nearer the desk. Once again sorry for the delayed responce. Best of luck. Brian.

I really liked your idea, it seems like a book that children would really enjoy reading. The way that the child tries to use the hamster to generate power is a really cute idea. The general atmosphere of the book is very light and creative. I found the idea interesting and the chapters very well written. It is intriguing thinking about how the family would deal with the lack of power, the things they would do to try and generate electricity. I think this would be a very enjoyable book , that children would love to read. :) - Bree

Well written story for the age-group intended. Introducing younsters to politics and environmental issues is very cleverly disguised as a fun story. It will generate a lot of interesting questions from the kids. Well done and good luck, this made a nice change from the usual books I read on here. Jesamine. Northampton, Lime and Time Alone.

Hi Debbie This is not the kind of story I usually read and I am an adult. That being said I believe children would enjoy it. It was lighthearted and easy to follow. Wouldn't it be nice if hamsters could produce our power. Steven Vaughn The Justicar

Hello, Debbie Finished reading this witty and light hamster story. It definitely encourages young kids to go on into a science field with remarkable ideas on simple ways of producing energy. It is easy to read and follow. Love Grace and Dillon! Love the way their minds work. Enjoyed the family conversations and supportive attitude. I am glad that the family got to see a queen and the Prime Minister--nice touch to the story. Thank you for sharing it, Alexandra Mahanaim Shoshanna, The Battle Series: Encountering Supernatural, Captivity, and Return to Eternity

Hi Debbie Firstly, as I am no longer a child I don't read books like this anymore, however pehaps i have clasifyed myself wrongly, I found the idea of no electricity intriguing. ( I live in North Wales and storms oftain put us in the same situation as poor Dillon!) . I only managed to read the first chapter but will read more as time allows, I am already wondering how the family will cope with the lack of power ( stationary bikes come to mind, peddled to power the TV, exercise and electric double whamy lol) you write very well and as a newly qualifyed big kid I loved it. High stars and the best of luck for this should be published book . Ian :-)

interesting children's piece. should do well. creative and fresh and easy to follow. some grammar errors could be cleaned up. j what every woman should know

Hi Debbie, The premise delighted, and Dillon's reaction to the PM really got things going. I also liked the family interactions and the tellings about their time on the bicycle. The story moves well to Dillon's hamster idea. I did feel that some of the sentence structures weighed down the action such as "the sickly smell of lavender that hovered above his head like a swarm of angry bees." Also, I noticed a punctuation issue in some structures, a comma needed after "grandmother" in "A hamster, dear," corrected her grandmother(,) easing herself. Aside from these observations, I think you've really got possibilities with this and the hamster comes off as a charmer. Shelved when I'm on my main computer - Katherine

Hi Debbie, Speedy McCready looks like a great children's book. These days there is a lot of emphasis in schools on children finding solutions to problems and creating innovative ideas, so this story fits well. Your writing is interesting and moves along at a reasonable pace. It is well edited and I'm sure your book will do well. Six stars and a place on my shelf.

I really like the idea of the government telling the people they had to come up with their own electricity, and used obescity as a scapegoat for the cause. it's an interesting outlook-and a raher different one at that. I notice though, in some places, you like to do like i just did-and have two commas back to back. My teachers in highschool once suggested, if i was going to keep the thought going but wanted a pause-a dash would liven up my paper instead of overuse of commas. Just an idea though. It sounds great either way. :)

I love the whole idea of the story. It really give you something to think about and the characters are great! Wonderful story! I think kids and adults would enjoy it. Quite a conversation piece!

Debbie, I just completed reading through chapter 4. You have a really cute and engaging story here. Your characters are believable and fun. The only thing that really stuck out to me that was a bit troublesome is that the dad was running late to work in chapter four and yet he hung out and waited on the hampster to perform for the family. Had you omitted the part about his being late to work then I as a reader wouldn't have been waiting for his exit... Otherwise I found the story to be well written and I'm certain that you will please your target audience immensely! Best to you! Audrey Semprun AKA Ladypreacher Crooked Places Straight: Straight Talk about Hard Places The Back Track Conspiracies

Hi Debbie, I am pleased to see that Speedy is still hard at work to make it to the top. I keep checking on him and keeping my fingers crossed. He would make such a lovely hard-back Christmas present. Brigitte

Review through Chapter 6 Personally, I feel that at this point, the story lacks the conflict I am used to seeing. This may be because I generally read drama / angst stories, and this is a light-hearted children's book. I prefer the dramatic, but that doesn't mean there is anything wrong with your style. I feel like many of the family's problems and setbacks are resolved very quickly, and that may be how children's books work. I do not know. I like the descriptions of the hamster and how you gave him personality. I used to have two pet hamsters, and they kept me up late at night too. I like the idea of the story, using usually wasted energy to create more energy. I like that you put a specific focus for each, individual chapter. Lydia :)

Review for Chapter 1 Overall, I like the story so far. I have one major critique, however. I highly suggest changing the very first word. The first sentence is crucial to pulling in an audience. Start with something bold. You begin with "It" (which is a pronoun and as the first word, there is nothing for it to refer to). "It" can be blank. In my opinion, substituting a regular noun would add more dimension to the story's takeoff. On to the next chapter! Lydia

Debbie, Very good and original. My youngest son would be fascinated - although I suspect he would have more technical questions than I could answer. I can imagine it with some really fun illustrations. All the best Toboggan The Hapshire Credit Crunch Blues

Finished the rest of your adorable book. I think the villain was truly worthy of reviling, but still as humorous and cartoonish as the rest of the cast. I loved little Speedy, and his love for reading. Humor, A+, Plot- A+, Characters, A+ - I gave you full stars! :)

What a cute story and it was so funny for me to read it now after we just went through an extended power outage here in the midwest from storms. How desperately we needed a few hampsters! I didn't get the whole story read yet, but I enjoyed what I did read. You write with a fun, engaging style. God bless you!! Elizabeth Kathleen "If Children are Cheaper by the Dozen, Can I Get a Discount on Six?"

Love it so far - made it through three chapters and will be back for more. The dialogue is effortless and natural, and your detail is neither too overbearing, nor too sparse. There's plenty of humor and I love the britishness of your spellings :) Yours, Sparrow

Hi Debbie, from the moment I began reading this book, I felt as though I was transformed back to my school days. The days when your favourite program and meeting your friends on roller skates was the most important things. I've loved reading it so far. I'm sure many more children will enjoy this story Best wishes Em x

Hi Debbie, i am re-visiting your book as i heard that you had been doing some editing, so i started from scratch. Just got to the end of chapter 10 with a grin on my face all the way! All of the characters are great, Dillon and Grace are great kids and their ideas are brilliant, mum and dad are very supportive and nurturing, whilst gran and grandad are great fun (loved the sherry part)! Then, enter the villain, booooooo - he will no doubt put a spanner in works, i am guessing at the minute, but i will read more to be satisfying my own curiosity. The pace of the plot is just right, plenty going on that keeps the reader wanting to keep turning the pages. Great Work, this book will no doubt appeal to all children, and adults, who dare to admit it! Well done Debbie, Regards, Little Miggy x

You have a wonderful imagination. Can you work on the last sentence? Maybe just turning things around and omitting 'realized' would leave the reader with a shot of strong feeling: something like 'Speedy sat back on his haunches and watched. These industrious creatures were his descendants. His little chest swelled with pride.' I'm just thinking that 'pride' is a stronger word to end with than 'descendants'.

Dear Debbie; I have just reread the first four chapters of your story. I am pleased to say that the introduction of the smiling Speedy in chapter four went down very well. The idea of harnessing the power of a hamster was always a great idea and your amalgamating of him earlier into the storyline is very well done. Here is hoping to a continued 'Speedy' climb up the site and the highest of stars. RMA The Snow Lily

Hi, Debbie! OK, I have finished the first 6 chapters. It's great! It reminds me of Andrew Clement's book "Frindle," in the effortless way you run with your idea. Your characterization is good, too; you are so nonchalant in letting the characters' actions establish their personalities without over-telling. I am looking forward to starting over and reading it to my kids all the way through. They are sure to enjoy it (and no more feeling guilty for reading when I should be interacting with them!) Don't know if you want line-edits or not, but I caught a few typos. I'll run through them quickly, but I'll quit doing it as I read on if it's annoying. (I do intend to read the whole manuscript!) Chapter 4: I think you dropped a couple of commas, both after Grace speaks. "announced Grace, pushing her..." and "groaned Grace, handing her..." Chapter 5: "roundespecially" Chapter 6: The comma thing again: "pleaded Grace, who'd hoped" and then one missing a comma and, I think, quotation marks: "whispered Grace, 'and we don't... wander.'"

I've read your first chapter, and I love what I've read so far. I'm going to rotate this on my shelf soon. In the meantime, it's on my watch list, 6 out of 6 stars. This is awesome The pace of your book is easy to follow. I did not once become bored and wonder when the chapter was going to end. I like the details, such as the father's hair clumped at the top of his head, the PM wiping his nose on his sleeve. It brings the story life. I'll read more as times permits...(single mother, and I baby sit) Good luck with your book, hun :) JCS Anguished Immortals Trilogy

Hi Debbie, really enjoyed the book. Has a Roald Dahl quality about it which is great. Mr Peabody is a great character. Hope you write some more, best of luck.

Hey Debbie - I've read the first chapter and really enjoyed it and it made me want to read on. I love the topic - very timely. What I love most if how you've captured the family unit coming together in a time of crisis and wanting to solve the problem together - thats sooooo important and an issue worthy to be raised and written about. Well done with this - you're definitely on my watch list - Jac :)

This is so charming right from start. I find myself smiling at this very imaginative idea. Great job!

CHIRG Hey Debbie this book is great. It flowed really well and at no point did I feel like the story was tiring. It is full of fun and I've got to say best of luck with this. Perfect for the target audience. I'm probably the worst person in the world with typos but on the last paragraph of chapter 20 there's a double space between the words post and with. If this was ever released I think hamster sales would increase! John

CHIRG Hi Debbie, just thought I'd comment on your first few chapters. Firstly, great concept packed with some original ideas. I especially liked the dialogue exchange in Chapter 2 - very lively and well handled. I would've liked to have been submerged in the 'families creating their own electricity' concept from the beginning, as this would've made for a more gripping start (rather than having the Prime Minister explaining what's going to be happening and why, which isn't as exciting as seeing it in action. This sort of exposition could be handled in flashbacks/garbled TV announcements from the Prime Minister). Anyway, I shall most certainly read more as I'm rather keen to see what that nippy little hamster gets up to next. keep up the good work, Dave Hailwood Grandpa's Teeth

Hi I am here as part of our swap. This is funny and believable I like how it's easy to read and is perfect for your target age group. As a hamster owner myself I can relate to Dillons idea, my dad often complains that we should hook a battery up to the wheel and have free energy.

Hi I am here as part of our swap. This is funny and believable I like how it's easy to read and is perfect for your target age group. As a hamster owner myself I can relate to Dillons idea, my dad often complains that we should hook a battery up to the wheel and have free energy. I can't think of anything to say about improving the story because I think it's great.

Hi Debbie, Your book is light and witty. The characters are accessible and believable - even the hamster's sense of humor! I cannot give you any pointers because I do not see where you could improve it. The story-line is intelligent and imaginative and there is no wasted time bringing the reader into the main plot. Well done, I've added it to my watchlist to monitor its progress. Steve

Chapter 6: "But he keeps asking for more," said Grace and we don't like to say no . . . Don't forget the quotation marks for the second half of that quotation. Otherwise, this story's flawless in my opinion. Great characterisations, funny plot, a fast-paced read. It's pretty hilarious! Rated and backed. Jenn Favored One

CHIRG Hi Debbie, Great job! You had my imagination and funny bone crankin' like SPEEDY hittin' the wheel! Your idea is wonderful. Tackling a power outage with a hamster. Good thinking! Writing about life without electricity is quite a task and you have managed it extremely well. Your vareity of characters is just right and not too numerous. The story moves at good pace, which I appreciate, and the well thought out plot developed step by step with captivating twists. Loved the PM's squirmy announcement to put the WHEEL in motion. Mr Peabody is the perfect underhanded meany. And Speedy is an awesome hamster! Wish I could have read past chapter 10 and fully intend to finish. No one knows your book like you. One enhancement may be to bring some more adversity, in regards to their discomfort level when the power went out. This may also make for a more impactful scene when Speedy brightens things up. All in all, this book is a gem on many levels. I intend to add it to my shelf! Thanks for sharing this unique story. Chris A SPICY HURRICANE

This is so funny! Having treadmills and bikes to use energy...that actually sounds like a good solution obesity and electricity. My own brother would be forced to work out if this ever happened. I like the plot so far and how smooth your writing is.

It's such a unique idea. Two small things in Ch. 21: Where you wrote 'Speedy's greying whiskers ... the next part suggests that the WHISKERS were 'barely able to believe ...' One possibility is just to make two sentences. A word is missing where you wrote 'Speedy wiped away ... Dillon when ____ had taken him'.

Great kids book, nice one Debbie.

Loads of laughter from me at the moment. You set the scene perfectly in my mind without going overboard with descriptive sentences. You allow me to imagine my own family on exercise bikes and my eldest grand child pulling his hair out because he couldn't finish a game. unusual and very good. Hope you have success with it. Pat

Hi Debbie, Fantastic premise, great title, wonderful characters, witty, imaginative... I could go on and on. But you're not going to like the next sentence. I think you should rewrite it. It is such a wonderful idea for a book, and I do love your characters, it's just that I think it could be even better. A lot of the ideas are telegraphed in - I know it is a children's book but you announce each new idea several pages before you introduce it. The opening scene with the PM and Health Minister is a valiant attempt at hiding exposition but still without any subtlety. The notion of Dillon and Speedy together solving the energy crisis is fantastic but I think Speedy should have been the family pet from the off. Grandma's knitting needles and Grandpa's foot-tapping are inspired ideas but they are over-milked. I think there should be dozens more ideas for generating electricity - at least two per chapter. (Little water turbines under every tap; solar cells on everyone's hats; electricity generation form children's swings and seesaws; a small wind farm next to Grandpa's bum...) I only say this because good though it undoubtedly is - and I would not be at all surprised if it generated interest from publishers and readers alike - I honestly believe it could be a classic. David (Author of 'Jack Par(r))

Hi, I am thoroughly enjoying this book. I've read a couple of chapters so far and was hooked instantly. Witty, easy-going dialogue. Well done.

CHIRG Hi Debbie, This is possibly only part one of my review because I am only a few chapters and and expect to read more, but I thought it worth an interim report. I have been reading Speedy McCready to my six year old and he is thoroughly enjoying it, laughing in all the right places, and is looking forward to hearing how the story unfolds. I don't know if you are considering reading aloud when writing, or whether your target audience is past that age, so ignore this if it's not relevant. A fair proportion of your dialogue has the format: speech; character name; descriptive passage. This is surprisingly tricky to negotiate when reading aloud. It looks fine on the page but when spoken it interrupts the pace. You spread character descriptions through the text and, whilst I can see why you don't want to have a big block of text introducing each character, they do sometimes slow things down. That's only a quibble though, and it only really relates to reading aloud. Generally, your writing is well pitched for confident primary school readers. Rory's reading age is ahead of Y1 level (the effect of having a bookworm for a mother!). He is currently addicted to the interminable BeastQuest series and I don't think that any child who can read those would have trouble with Speedy McCready, yet there's enough going on to engage an older child. Certainly, Rory could read it if I was willing to lend my iPhone or laptop so he could do so. I will comment again if we come across anything else as we read but I am highly starring based on what we have read. Good luck! Adele, The Cabinet of Curiosities

Hi Debbie I have put you on my watch list and will get around to reading soon. Thanks for the contact and hopefully you will like The Ghost Shirt. D.J.

As a science writer and retired teacher, I find this book wonderful! Definitely backing your work! Hope you have a chance to take a look at Dark Side by CC Brown. Sue50

Hello Debbie, I have put Speedy back on my bookshelf. He is close to the ED and I am keeping my fingers crossed that he gets selected. best wishes Brigitte

What a lovely book - I recommend it without reservation!

loved the title and the cover. Was worried by the pitch that the book might be a bit preachy but you seemed to avoid sounding preachy in the 2 chapters i read. i enjoyed the chapters and read them to my girls. they wanted a bit more to happen but they are a bit young for your target audience.

Speedy McCready. By Debbie Roxburgh. I found the story to be hilarious at times, I could see the sparks coming off Gran’s knitting pins as she produces plenty of power to the battery store—Granddad’s foot tapping...I couldn’t stop laughing as the power meter flashed back and forth in time with his movements. Ha Ha. I loved the scene of the government official trying to explain the use of the exercise bike to Mr McCready... very lifelike and funny. The dialogue throughout the book comes over very well bearing in mind it’s a children’s read really. There’s so much going off in this book that it can’t fail to attract a young readership. I would have cherished this story when I was a youngster. I was always interested in electricity; this would have fascinated me for quite a time and given me food for thought. Read to chapter ten, will be back to complete it. Enjoyed your writing and humour, Debbie—Very nice! Many stars and best wishes. Kind regards, Neville. The Secrets of the Forest – The Time Zone.

This is an interesting, fun story and the idea behind it is good. It's great to see it moving up the ranks.

CHIRG I'm returning to this after a lengthy absence. I have read the first six chapters and will attempt to rerun to read more! This is a very well-written entertaining story with an original idea at its heart. I am enjoying this just as much this time as the last time I visited. It's well-pitched at its target readership. A couple of nitpicks which you can take or leave as you wish! Ch 3 Not sure you need to refer to Grace's age again at this stage. But entirely up to you! Ch 5 Whispered Grace, and we don't . . .' speech marks missing before 'and'. Other than that a great piece of writing. Highly starred. I will place on my shelf when I have a space, but I have a few in front of yours. All the best Julia Shadow Jumper

I really enjoyed reading this. I've read the first chapter and may read the rest. It's written well and is easily followed, interesting and atmospheric. Good lessons in environmental awareness for the kids, too. Well done! I will rate this highly. Katie Ridley, 'The Last Message'. x

CHIRG Review What a top read, not only is it a great idea for producing electricity, but who knows maybe a Tour de France winner too! I like the gentle way you introduce the thinking hamster, and the baddie Mr Peabody is wonderfully painted, I even took a dislike to his dog too. In Dillon and Grace you have two smart child characters that carry the adults, and there's a strange reality to the piece that makes it very believable. Only got to chapter 11, but that was due to an overloaded watchlist, I will be back for more! Highly starred Sam Committee of Dubious Goals

We are loving your book so much! I am retired now but still teach English part-time to young students. They are enjoying it also, especially the hamster! Tschuss, Ernst

I really like your premise; good writing. not sure if it's a UK thing but I'm used to seeing periods after Mr. and Mrs.; other than that, excellent... One chapter down and counting.

Hi Debbie! I read your first 8 chapters this afternoon! What a fun story! I like the way the children interact, a litlle bit competitive, a little bit jealous, but mostly encouraging and cooperative! The one thing I thought I would change is what Dillon was about to watch when the TV went out. I think you have a great opportunity right there to introduce Dillon as a budding scientist if he is about to watch a much anticipated show on the science channel about some aspect of nature or chemistry he's highly interested in or has been researchng for a school project or something like that. Other than that I saw one typo (which was a tense error) but I was so in the story I forgot where it was. Sorry! I think you have a really fun read here! High stars! Best of luck with it! Mindy The Wishing Place

Debbie, Lovely story. Read the first three chapters. Great premise, fun characters, great family picture and just a plot that moves as quickly as the family on their bikes. The pacing is perfect for a child's read or a read-to book. It made me wish I had a treadmill connected to a battery to power my television. Wouldn't it be great to get in shape that way? I love the barter system the family worked out. I like the interaction between Grace and Dillon, so believable. All in all, a very well done book. Well edited and polished, not a wrong or wasted word. High stars and a little time on the shelf. Good luck on your writing, Janet The Milche Bride Clarissa's Kitchen

Hay Debbie, what a wonderful idea you have thought up. I read with my eight year old every night and will be taking the ipad up there as soon as she's finished the book she's on, she would love it. Dillon and Grace are lovely characters with a real care for one an other and working together can only leave a positive message for the reader. Also i may find Lily (my daughter) wanting to be a bit more interested in science rather than magic. There is a huge amount of imagination in the story but there are practical and social issues involved, although all lighthearted. It's thought provoking for a child, could it really happen? 'eyes wide in wonder' type of questions. Really well written, all the best Emma

A light, amusing story with likeable characters - I'm really enjoying this! I can imagine it being very popular with children. Speedy's character is adorable and humorous, and your other characters are strong and realistic too. In chapter 5, paragraph 16, you've missed speech marks in Grace's dialogue: '...whispered Grace and we don't like to say no...' Other than that the MS seemed immaculate. Lots of stars and best wishes, Isabel.

This book is going to be a big hit for kids very well written funny engaging a must for the classroom. i would have enjoyed reading it to my children when they were young well done Debbie. Phil.

Hi Debbie can't understand why this isn't published yet, it's an excellent idea & told in a such a fun way, that I'm sure as many teachers would enjoy reading it as kids would enjoy listening to it! I did notice one slight error, ('kept' instead of 'keep' because it was a question not a statement) not sure if there were anymore as I'm no good at remembering such things. One or two passages did jar a bit when read out loud, so you might need to check some of your sentence constructions. But apart from these minor errors it seems good enough to publish to me. I hope you get the interest you deserve sooner rather than later. Pam Balsdon The King's Blessing

CHIRG review Hi Debbie, such a cute story! read all 22 and loved it, even down to booing Mr Peabody! congratulations of a very enjoyable book. :) diane

CHIRG review Hi Debbie, First of all, thanks for taking the time to review 'Elton: The Different Kookaburra' - big smiles when I saw your comments. I've just joined the group and I'm reading this first since you kindly read mine first. I was immediately drawn in by the brief and was not at all disappointed as the story keeps even an adult's imagination from the off. I love the concept and the almost-scary realism to the storyline. I'm also a keen conservationist and I like the way you've added the issues of the government and alternative energy to raise the awareness of this among the younger generation. In terms of characters - very well done with this. Dillon and his family are easy to relate to and he reminds me of my own nephew...too clever for his own good! I'm also a firm believer in humour in children's books and you don't scrimp on that either...even made me chuckle in places! For the younger reader, no criticisms on the vocab, presentation and how much it's broken up into chapters. It's clear to see why this is doing well and the story is a big credit to you as an author. All the best, Lee :-)

CHIRG review Hi Debbie, First of all, thanks for taking the time to review 'Elton: The Different Kookaburra' - big smiles when I saw your comments. I've just joined the group and I'm reading this first since you kindly read mine first. I was immediately drawn in by the brief and was not at all disappointed as the story keeps even an adult's imagination from the off. I love the concept and the almost-scary realism to the storyline. I'm also a keen conservationist and I like the way you've added the issues of the government and alternative energy to raise the awareness of this among the younger generation. In terms of characters - very well done with this. Dillon and his family are easy to relate to and he reminds me of my own nephew...too clever for his own good! I'm also a firm believer in humour in children's books and you don't scrimp on that either...even made me chuckle in places! For the younger reader, no criticisms on the vocab, presentation and how much it's broken up into chapters. It's clear to see why this is doing well and the story is a big credit to you as an author. All the best, Lee :-)

Speedy McCready by Debbie Roxburgh This is a lovely, imaginative, splendidly-written story and great fun as well - I loved the sparks flying from Grandma's knitting needles, for instance. What a wonderful way to solve the energy crisis! Well-pitched and easy to read with some quirky and endearing characters. This is heading for the top - and deservedly so.Well done! Connie Streets Apart

I would lie if I would say I am not so much into childrens books. This one is surely a good read, and yes, what's most important to me, good fun. Besides well written, and throws one dierctly into the story at the first page. Super, I would say.

What a great little story for kids! The kind to be read as they are tucked up in bed. As you know Deb, I only comment on story and not on nitty little things, and it's a great little story! It would probably do well with a few well placed illustrations, (though it shouldn't be an illustrated book as such.) I've put it on my watch list and I've got several children's books on my shelf, I hope in the near future to have a backing space. Well done!

Hi; Read the first 5 chapters with my kids, thoroughly enjoyed it! A great fun book to read, nothing negative to say about it... All the best! I've rated it. P.S. My book http://www.authonomy.com/books/44865/said-the-spider/

Debbie, What a cute story! I've read through chapter 7 so far. You certainly have a clever and unique idea here! One thing that surprised me was that there was no mention of Speedy until ch. 6. From the title and the pitch, I thought Speedy would be part of the story right from the beginning. I don't have any specific suggestions on how, but I would like to see him introduced earlier on in the story. A few of the sentences seemed long as others have mentioned. But overall, I think it's a fun story that shows kids how to use their imaginations and creativity. All the best to you!! Patti

CHIRG review, Hi Debbie, I have read some more of your book. I can just see Speedy the hamster being a big hit with my class, they love stories with pets in them. The storyline flows well and I like the way you use dialogue to move the plot on. I will keep reading and get back to you with any points I feel every strongly about. Best wishes for now.

Hi Debbie, You asked me to look at this book and I did so, and now I have taken a further look and read to chapter 13 so that I can give some feedback. This is a great idea - maybe not totally original, yet I cannot think I have ever seen it in print before, so this is novel and a fun concept. Also your writing flows nicely. I spotted at least one sentence in passive voice in chapter 12 ("An envelope was finally unearthed..."), although that was the exception - your writing is generally active and exciting. However, in terms of story, I did not feel the excitement of what is going on emerged very early. That may just be personal taste, but I think I would have started the story with more of a bang, and without worrying about introducing the concept of electrical generation straight away. Maybe do the both together by having something happen like a near disaster when electricty starts to fail as a prologue. As I say, that be my personal tastes though so just something to consider. In any case I cannot back this just now as I already have five books I like on my shelf, but good luck with this great book. Y

Hi Debbie, This is a fantastic idea! I fell in love with the characters from the very first chapter. So far, I think you are a strong storyteller with a natural talent for developing unique ideas. My only concern is that some of the sentences are a bit too long. Although, that might just be my preference and my expectation given the genre. I will continue reading and let post a longer comment after I'm done. I honestly think this book will be on my real life bookshelf soon. Good luck with this project and I'll keep checking in. W

CHIRG Review Hi Debbie, I've read up to Chapter 6 so far and thought I'd check in. I love the idea and admit I (and probably others) would actually like to hook up something like a bike to create my own energy. So you have an instant connection with many adults I'm sure. I find it light-heartedly funny, quaintly English (at least for someone that's not English - I suppose charming is a better word), and I think equally enjoyed by boys and girls. Some of the sentences I thought were overly long. Obviously I haven't read the whole story yet, but I don't think it would hurt to do an edit purely for tightening of the language. There’s a book I read by William Zinsser called “On writing well”. It’s pitched for non-fiction but is still relevant – good for being succinct and clear. It’s been around for 30 years so bound to be in countless libraries - worth a look if you can find it and it's enjoyable considering its subject matter. Chap 6 – second para “they one” should be “the one”. Also, this sentence is too long. 5th para – “Grandpa has given him” should be “Grandpa had” Anyway, I'll keep reading. Very enjoyable so far! Jeff

CHIRG Review Hi Debbie, I've read up to Chapter 6 so far and thought I'd check in. I love the idea and admit I (and probably others) would actually like to hook up something like a bike to create my own energy. So you have an instant connection with many adults I'm sure. I find it light-heartedly funny, quaintly English (at least for someone that's not English - I suppose charming is a better word), and I think equally enjoyed by boys and girls. Some of the sentences I thought were overly long. Obviously I haven't read the whole story yet, but I don't think it would hurt to do an edit purely for tightening of the language. There’s a book I read by William Zinsser called “On writing well”. It’s pitched for non-fiction but is still relevant – good for being succinct and clear. It’s been around for 30 years so bound to be in countless libraries - worth a look if you can find it and it's enjoyable considering its subject matter. Chap 6 – second para “they one” should be “the one”. Also, this sentence is too long. 5th para – “Grandpa has given him” should be “Grandpa had” Anyway, I'll keep reading. Very enjoyable so far! Jeff

Debbie This book is utterly delightful and tells a wonderfully fascinating fantasy story. It pulled me right in and kept me reading. I just adore Dillion already and can see why he is such a fascinating character. How did you ever think up such an enjoyable tale? I can't wait to see the ending. This book will surely go up on my shelf as soon as I can make room and I give you 6 stars for your original thinking. Blessings, Joy

This isn't the sort of thing I would usually read, but I was pleasantly surprised as I actually quite like it! The idea of having to power your own electricals is certainly an interesting one, especially in today's world. The story so far (first four chapters) is well written, making it easy to picture what's happening in my mind. I'll definitely be reading the rest.

CHIRG Review Hello, I like your story, and you've got a good, original idea here. I think you've done some editing since I started reading (or am I just a bit confused?)? I think chapter one used to contain the Xbox sequence? I like it much better now when you've moved it to chapter 2. (It's Xbox and not X Box by the way - sorry to point this out but kids will probably spot it straight away). Personally, I like a mix of narration and converstation in each chapter, and you've got chapters that are made up almost entirely of conversation (ch 5 for instance) and some that have almost none (ch 6, 11). Maybe this could be a bit more evenly balanced? Although, I've seen from the comments below that some people really like the contrast. A minor thing that struck me: you may want to add some more general tags? Maybe some to do with environmental concerns rather than the very specific 'national grid'? Hig star rating from me - best of luck! Jessica Oskar the Viking

CHIRG Hi Debbie, Returning your read. I read your first four chapters and took an instant liking to the McCready family. The alternative source of power idea is a good one, something that will not be beyond the understanding of young readers. Something I noticed in these early chapters. In the house everything is done in a rather calm manner. This contrasts with published stories in this genre that I've read recently. Many published children's writers use capitals or italics to emphasize key words and exclamation marks are rife. Perhaps these are things you could look at. But overall a very enjoyable story. High stars! Camac Johnson Klipspringer Hill

It's very funny. You should check out the man on Dragon's Den who invented a sofa with a built in gym. Maybe he was on to something. The dragons kicked him out though. The style reminds me of Dahl.

Great hook!

I had to keep reading and I've finished it! A really entertaining read with some good environmental messages about the environment, respecting animals and family loyalty and pride. Good contrast with ch 11 and 12 being mostly narrative, unlike previous chapters. Love the way you bring the baby hamsters into the world - reminds me of that happening in our house when I was little! Like ch 17 - comparable to 101 dalmations with Mr Peabody being the male version of Cruella! Constructive criticism: ch 10 Extra " in sentence beginning "Yes quite sure..." ch 14 Para near end "With the new arrivals..." I had to read this a couple of times to get my head round it - maybe it would be better if you built up more tension of Mr Peabody's unknown presence apart from his smell. Possibly a chill down spine, or weather darkening etc? See what you think? But they are nothing! I really enjoyed this and know many of the children I teach would do too - as well as my son! Lots of stars and I'm backing you! Kate Best of luck

Hi! As promised I have continued reading your book (I had previously read 4 chapters) The way you use dialogue and narrative is well done and the characters interact brilliantly! I love the rather cool laid back Speedy McCready and the whole family are so typical it makes such humorous reading! I like the way Dylan's hair stands on end with a good idea too! Chapter 9 introduces new characters, and, again, you portray 'typical' students very well and the teacher reminds me of a chemistry teacher I myself had (unfortunately!) I honestly can't find any faults! It flows so well and has the humour and style of Roald Dahl. Will keep reading! Kate (Beyond The Clouds)

CHIRG Review. Hi Debbie, I read up to chapter 5 and will continue later. Here is the feedback on the parts I read. I found the story hilarious because of the little jealousy at play between the characters, Dillion and Grace. It is also good that the plot is about a topic everyone can relate to - energy conservation and keeping fit. I had planned to read just the first chapter but found myself reading on. I was doing this beacuse I was searching for that lttle bit of frustration every child experiences when trying out new things or plans, both Dillion and Grcae seem to be natural genuises. The only other issue I have is in chapter 5, where the children ply their gradfather with sherry and lace his tea with sugar. Think about this, would this be a good prank to play on an elderly person, children usually play these sort of tricks on their pets; and this is speaking purely from a teacher's angle Pets can recover; an elderly person may suffer a heart attack or diabetes as a conseqeunce of much alcohol and sugar consumption. I think the point I am trying to make is that not everyone would find that particular plot funny and therefore may not recommend your book to younger children on account of this. I am a teacher, I should know. I do hope that it is honesty that you are looking for in the feedback, this is straight talking from a teacher. Look at that chapter again and if you are happy with it, keep it otherwise twick it a bit.. Overall it is coming on as a great story, well done. I am backing it with top rating. Best wishes, Fidelia.

I always read at least 5 to 6 chapters, or all that is posted. In this case I read all 22 chapters with great joy. It is said there is many a true word spoken in jest, this book proves that correct. Never mind the children, I loved it, and spent a most enjoyable Sunday reading all, top marks. ******6 Portraits Of A Small Peasant...Phil.

Debbie, What fun! I can imagine many kids loving this book! Wonderful story telling! Great job! I've backed your book! Jane Lawry The Genealogists: On Holy Ground (A Supernatural Horror Novel)

A well-earned, CHIRG Review! Hi there Debbie, This is a fantastic idea and rather makes me wish that someone would do it for real! The McCreadies are a funny bunch (Though I'd probably rechristen them McCreedy, so that children instantly identify the rhyme (as opposed to reading it Mc-Ready). I particularly like the parents bewildered reactions to the big change and the way that it's the adults who have the biggest difficulties. I read the first three chapters and my biggest criticism would probably be that you don't develop the children's personalities too much early on and it's a good idea to give your main characters strong, clearly defined characters so that they grip your readers and stay with them. Apart from this the things I noticed were all very minor and are detailed beneath! ‘The best feeling in the world,’ he thought -according to a well-known self-editing book I just read, thoughts should be expressed in italics and never in speech marks. went blank again and the lights went out, leaving him sitting alone in - add the comma when he too disappeared from sight AND the television shut down. -runs smoother had merely HAD a bad day at the office -why the formality – had is a small and necessary enough word to not worry about repeating Whatever the reason for this garbled speech, Dillon felt sure that everything would -comma Mrs McCready appeared like a ray of sunshine after the storm with a torch in each hand. “There are some candles in the cupboard under the stairs,” -it’s eleven o’clock on Sat morning, why do they need candles and torches “I can’t go to work tomorrow morning smelling like an old lady.” -it’s Saturday morning – would he work on a Sunday? HIGHLIGHTED -I’d put it as one word This evening is just a minor set back, that’s all.” Has time passed or is this an error? Funny concluding line to Chapter one CH 2 “I’m not going to get very far on an exercise bike,” I know it’s a kid’s comedy but would anyone think that an exercise bike was intended as a form of transportation. With that he turned and strutted OUT the front door as though To make it clear he’s leaving “What!” exclaimed Dillon wondering why HIS sister, who was really rather clever for an eight-year-old, WAS THE ONE WHO could come up with such a ridiculous idea. after the initial shock it hadn’t taken the McCready family long to decide what they would be happy to hop on to the exercise bike for. Rotas were drawn up and agreements made as an hour’s surfing the net was exchanged for enough hot water for a quick shower. -perhaps we could see this occur rather than just be told about it? The arguments involved might be fun to witness! “Not watching your favourite programme?” -bit vague, wouldn’t she say the name of the show? Overall a very original idea with some nice comedic touches, Highly starred, Benedict

Well I am a huge fan of children's stories. My favourite book in the world is "The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe" I love yo style of writing, it is like James Patterson - quick moving and entertaining. Some times people can turnoff so to speak when they are being lectuered to about the environment, but you rite in a fun and exciting way. I cannot wait to read on. Rated very highly Dean Rough Justice

CHIRG Speedy Ch1 Loved the humour of how the family reacts to the first blackout, Ch2 nice work showing how the lack of power affects them. Ch4 electricity needs a circuit .. So there needs to be a cable attached from to the battery store to the wellington boot.. Etcetera And you bring in cables in ch 8 Ch7 Lovely description of the naming of speedy. Ch 8 the image of speedy sulking over a girlfriend make me grin. Ch 9 Mr. Peabody sounds like a pin? But makes a convincing villain. (a generator has magnets that move at right angles to a coil of conducting metal , but I think I'm taking this story too seriously ) THE HAMSTERNAP of speedy was scary, and the way he got home worked for me. Very funny story Best wishes Cas

Being a grumpy old man, I don't often read children's literature. I do have an eleven year old grand daughter, however, and I am always on the lookout for things she will enjoy. I will recommend this to her. Your flash-back confused me a bit, though. I didn't realuze it was a flash-back at first. I believe you could improve your book and avoid confusion by making it clear at the outset.

Hi Debbie, My 8 yr old son and I have started reading your book and have enjoyed it very much! We have read to chapter 4 for now but will keep reading later. We both liked the way you use dialogue effectively to show sibling rivalry aswell as their special bond. The idea is superb - such an important environmental message. I liked the flashback in chapter 2, although I think for children, it would help if you opened this chapter with a sentence that points the direction of the flashback more clearly ( E.g. The McCready's relatively easy family life had all changed one Saturady morning, three weeks previously...) Will keep reading and commenting as I really like this book! Kate

Hi Debbie. I'm up to chapter nine now and will carry on reading as and when I can grab a few minuets. It's sounding good. I like the way it's panning out; obviously its still early days but I will get to the end reading it little by little. Just one thing I noticed in chapter 8. It says "Why would be want more hamsters?" I think you mean we? Anyway Its looking good. Speak soon David

This is easy to read, delightfully inventive, as well as teaching an important lesson about the environment. I was glad you quickly moved away from running on the treadmill to attaching converters to Gran and Granpa and then onto a hamster wheel. Although you are solving the issues of electricity for one family, apart from that there doesn't seem to be much conflict. I'm wondering if you would want to raise the stakes a little. Maybe, one of the kids sprains their ankle and can't cycle. What then? Also, what about the rest of the community? Is it possible to introduce some new characters? Anyway, a fun read. I wish you all the best with it. Mary

YARG review. Hi Debbie, What an excellent story. I started reading and read the entire thing in one setting. It is well written and very appealing I'll bet to children. Having Dillon and his sister involvved provides interest to both boys and girls. I have a couple of comments. Chapter 7 – 8 lines down or so, starting with, “Didn’t the one Dillon brought home from school kept him up…”. I believe “kept” should be “keep”. Later, you wrote – “Brilliant!” yelled his father enthusiastically.” Inside the house? I’d suggest “exclaimed” or something instead. Yell is often an over-used term. People really seldom yell, even when speaking loudly. The entire story is very good. I like the "intelligence" of Speedy and his contributions to the story are sure to please the children. Your use of Mr. Peabody as a villain was great. I appreciated the happy ending and the good lessons hidden in the story for children. I give this 6 stars. Thank you for suggesting I read your story.

I really like this, a great way for children to understand our current energy crisis. I work in a year 5 class and I know they would like it too. Well done

Poor Grace, indeed. While “Dillon is the main character” Grace definitely had my sympathy in the first chapter! I liked the flashback in chapter two in which Dillon hears about the new energy plan and the way in which the Prime Minister delivers his news: so quickly that Dillon wonders if he has misheard (and probably hopes he has). In chapter two: “snapped his father wishing” should probably have a comma after “father” In chapter three I loved Grace’s worry that she had never mastered the art of cycling. In chapter four I think “explain that to mum and dad” should be “explain that to Mum and Dad” In chapter five “give it a go his feet” should have a comma after “go” Grace and Dillon’s plot to use their grandparent’s knitting and foot tapping to generate electricity is hilarious. At the end of chapter five should “slipped in beneath a tin” be “slipped it beneath a tin”? You’ve got a font change in chapter six—smaller type. Especially with the mention of the tin of hamster food in chapter five, I was quite surprised in the next chapter to learn Dillon didn’t yet have his hamster Speedy. Maybe clarify this a little earlier? Anyway, I think this is a great story. The chapters seem to be the perfect length for a children’s book: short enough it’s easy to think “I’ll just read one more” and then “one more.” The style is brisk and funny. It’s very easy to picture this getting published. Great job!

The more I read this book, the more I like it. The story is great. It's funny. It’s original. I’m sure it will stay on my shelf for a long time. That is the very reason why I should want to offer some criticism. I think the writing is a bit ragged in places. It could do with some trimming. Nearly all great writers stress the value of brevity. Very few advocate verbosity. Sydney Smith went very far when he gave this advice: "In composing, as a general rule, run your pen through every other word you have written; you have no idea what vigor it will give to your style." It’s an exaggeration, but many on this website should take heed. There is absolutely nothing wrong with the verb "say". It does exactly what it is supposed to do, without any fuss, almost without being noticed. Constantly seeking alternatives such as cry, shout, comment, reply, ask, suggest etc. is not only unnecessary, it becomes rather contrived and even a bit annoying. It also leads to the simply erroneous use of verbs such as smile, laugh and sigh. Nobody smiles, laughs or sighs words. I’m only saying this because I want your book to do well. I think it can go all the way on substance, so it would be a shame if minor stylistic flaws diminished its chances.

Many a child would be intrigued by this story. I liked the theme of energy conservation so imaginatively used. The talking and reading hamster surprised me, no other fantasy of this kind having been introduced in early chapters. Can you somehow suggest this characteristic of the tale ahead of time? I'll keep reading.

This is a brilliant idea for a story. It is well written and I can see my children especially my 9 year old son being very taken by it. The chapter lengths were good for that age group. It deserves to do very well and will be on my shelf soon with lots of stars. Chrissie "Amy"

I did enjoy this! Especially the last chapter - it finished things off beautifully. One thing - I would have liked to have heard more from Speedy himself. Maybe every so often a chapter from his point of view. The chapter when he is captive in Mr Peabody's house would have worked well in this way for example. Overall I enjoyed it - a novel idea and was exciting enough to keep children reading.

I love the idea of this story. I love how realistic it is, in turn making it so believable. You have the typical brother-sister relationship and the typical mother-father pair, which makes this work so well. It's funny, but heart wrenching that these people have to bicycle for energy. What a fantastic story you made! I especially liked how you started off with how things are now, and then went back and showed how it all started. I can't wait to read more of this! Racheal

An interesting and thought provoking premise with some fun moments. I became a little confused by chapters one and two. Does chapter two occur before chapter one chronologically becuase they are generating power in chapter one, but only thinking about it in chapter two? J.S.Watts Witchlight

Hiya Debbie, I read Chapter 5, I found it intriguing. People like to discover things and you convey great excitement with your description. Good Luck with your book, I am sure it will do well. Kindest Regards and Best Wishes Lenny Banks Tide and Time: At the Rock

Here's my promised read of your first two chapters. It's an intriguing premise and tackles very contemporary issues - fitness/obesity and natural resource shortage. (Ok, electricity isn't currently a problem for the developed world, but it could be in the near future. I can't imagine that happening in the next few years, though. The mention of Prince Charles and the Queen suggests that this takes place in this decade.) Your writing style is clean and suitable for the intended audience. No real grammatical errors as such, although I did feel it needed additional punctuation in a few places, especially around dialogue. You have a few bits of dialogue ending "X said" accompanied by an action in the same sentence. (i.e. "'There are some candles in the cupboard under the stairs,’ she announced handing one of the torches to her husband whose dark brown hair was sticking up in damp clumps across the top of his head.") Fine to use this construction occasionally, not all the time. Vary your structure a little. But that's just a minor nitpick. Overall, this is very good and I will think about clearing a space for it on my Desk as soon as possible. Rated five stars I look forward to your review of "Tamria". James "Tamria" *** CHAPTER 1 “The screen flickered momentarily and then died.” – feel this sentence would read better if it had a comma. –> “The screen flickered momentarily, and then died.” “staggering off of the exercise bike” – shouldn’t really use “off of”, it’s a clumsy word-use. –> “retorted his sister, staggering off the exercise bike” A quick science question: is the kinetic energy generated in a dynamo by a person pedaling a bike sufficient to power an Xbox console, or a microwave? I admit to not knowing much about physics, but I was under the impression cycle-power was only enough to power, say, a torch or small lamp. I know this is fiction, though. “Suspension of disbelief” and all that! “arguments made as an hour’s surfing the net was exchanged…” – how about “net-surfing” instead of “surfing the net”? That’s two words fewer, at least, and fits the sentence better. “Only Buckingham Palace and no. 10 Downing Street still had the luxury of power and hot water without pain.” – So who’s powering the servers that allow internet-surfing? Pity the poor losers who got that job. I would think the internet would be one of the last things on people’s minds in a free-electricity-less world! “‘Watching your favourite programme?’ asked Mum.” – I’d change the last two words around. –> “‘Watching your favourite programme?’ Mum asked.” “three-quarters-of-an-hour” – I’m normally a stickler for correct hyphen use (as Lucy Middlemass would be able to tell you) but I don’t know if it’s needed here. –> “three quarters of an hour.” “Grace grabbed the remote control and settled back as her mother climbed into the well-worn saddle and began to peddle.” – as with my first comment, I think this sentence needs a comma near the end. It’s a trivial nit-pick. –> “Grace grabbed the remote control and settled back as her mother climbed into the well-worn saddle, and began to peddle.” CHAPTER 2 “His face began twitching in a rat-like manner” – hmm, sounds like an apt description of Tony Blair. –> “His face began to twitch” “The Prime Minister delivered this life-changing statement at such speed” – “with such speed”, not “at such speed.” “Dillon wondered whether he had misheard” – “if” instead of “whether” “Then the screen went blank…” – again, I think a comma might improve the flow of this sentence, which is rather long and without punctuation. –> “Then the screen went blank again and the lights went out, leaving him sitting alone in the lounge, trying to take in the enormity of what had just happened.” “The television flickered back to life again” –don’t need “again”. –> “The television flickered back to life”. “give out a huge sigh of relief” –> “release a huge sigh of relief’ ? A clever idea! Get all the fat children and parents to *pedal* for their food and TV! Better yet, pedal while they’re *watching* TV! A sound initiative – curb obesity and cut the drain on the National Grid at the same time. You should run for office! “lost all track of time and urgency” – can you lose all track of urgency? That’s what the sentence seems to be suggesting. Doesn’t make sense. –> “lost all sense of time or urgency” is better. “ ‘There are some candles in the cupboard under the stairs,’ she announced handing one of the torches to her husband whose dark brown hair was sticking up in damp clumps across the top of his head.” – another long sentence in need of punctuation. Only one comma required. –> “‘There are some candles in the cupboard under the stairs,’ she announced, handing one of the torches to her husband whose dark brown hair was sticking up in damp clumps across the top of his head.” Next sentence: also could use a comma. “Half an hour later the four of them were seated around the kitchen table, the pungent scent of lavender hanging above them like a cloud.” “smirked Dillon.” – a character can’t “smirk” dialogue. (Any more than he can “scowl” dialogue. I’ve had this brought up on my own writing. So I’m going through and dealing with all instances of dialogue tag misuse.) –> “said Dillon with a smirk” is a good alternative. “replied Mrs McCready…” – this is a long bit of description attached to Mrs. McCready replying, and I wonder if it might work better if the sentence was broken up. (Also shouldn’t “high-lighted” be a single word, “highlighted”?) –> “‘I think that might be the least of your worries,’ replied Mrs McCready, running her fingers through her highlighted curls. She lounged back and basked in the heady scent given off by the candles she had received several Christmases ago.” (P.S. Isn’t “McCready the name of the harridan housekeeper in C.S. Lewis’s The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe? I like the name, anyway!) “minor set back” – “set back” is one word. –> “setback”. “‘Yes I get the picture,’ snapped his father wishing…” – put a comma after “father”, for the sentence to flow. You have a lot of long sentences (particularly after dialogue) lacking essential punctuation. “Fortunately the fridge was humming again but whether the electric oven would be working tomorrow was beginning to worry her” 1, again, this sentence needs a comma. 2, “would be working” –> I think “would work” is tidier and avoids a confusing choice of tense. 3, “Fortunately the fridge was humming again, but whether the electric oven would work tomorrow was beginning to worry her.” “ ‘Yes, Dillon’s right,’ agreed Mr McCready coming back downstairs…” – I would make the action separate to the dialogue here, i.e. in a separate sentence. If you look, you have quite a few instances of the “said X doing this” structure. Better to use “said X. He/she did this” for variation. –> “‘Yes, Dillon’s right,’ Mr McCready agreed. He came downstairs carrying the box of tablets he had been looking for.” I’m slightly bewildered that we don’t know anything about these characters yet, in terms of their age or physical appearance. How old is Dillon? Given his speech, and the fact that he’s playing an Xbox, I’d imagine early teens. Given his sister’s poutiness and self-interest, she’s probably a teenager too. But you need to give the reader something to work on. All I know so far is that Mrs McCready has highlighted hair. You don’t need to give detailed physical descriptions, and sometimes it’s best to reveal as little as possible, except where a clear visual picture is needed, to allow the reader to picture the character in their head. For example, all I give away about my story’s hero Coren is his age (fifteen), size (skinny, short, given an exact height later of five foot six), hair (tousled – colour not mentioned, a passing comment later that he is “fair skinned and fair haired”), and athletic. Specifics are given to Dio (red hair, impish build, mischievous grin, dirty hands) because they are essential to understanding his personality. (i.e. red hair is commonly considered a sign of aggressiveness or eccentricity – the former in Dio’s case.) A great deal of attention is lavished on the attire worn by Queen Beruthia and Boss Bacchus, because that is important to those characters. Cassius’s skin colour is mentioned (swarthy) to set him apart from the other main characters (they are all white-skinned), and that might go some way to explaining his sense of self-superiority. So you may not need to go into great detail with your characters’ appearances, but at least give us some idea what your protagonists look like. Is Dillon or anyone in his family overweight? That’s an important question, if in your story the issues of obesity and electricity are interlinked!

Hi Debbie. I'm on chapter six, and you sucked me right in. I love it. I love the idea you've come up with; I think it's fantastic, and I'm eager to see how it all turns out. I'll definitely be back for more!

a terrifically fun satire. Fun for the whole family. G rated inanity.

Hi Debbie, I've read the first five chapters and it seems like a good idea for (not only a children's book) but for maybe a children's si-fi novel as well? I like the part were you describe the grandparent's maybe communicating using knitting needles, that's funny : ) I'll carry on reading when I grab a few more spare hours. Speak soon. David PS: Keep up the good work, It's a good idea.

Hi Debbie, Book swap review as promised. I've read 11 chapters and your story is wonderfully entertaining. I am going to try this on my youngest as I think she will enjoy it. Just one small thing, your Chapter 12 has reverted to Chapter 1. When you've fixed it let me kow so that I can read on and find out what happens to Speedy! Lots of stars and will be back for more! Thanks Al Seyers The Orb Gatherer

CHIRG Review- Speedy McCready There are quite a few reasons this story has been on my shelf for some time. Imaginative! Well written! Wonderful Pace! And a pure enjoyment to read! There are not too many stories that you can picture your own family as the cast of characters, and how they would deal with the problems of generating your own power. I hope more would take the time to read this story. JJ Marro Magic of the Frogs

SPEEDY MCGREADY This is a story based on a great premise: what would our world be like if we no longer had electricity? I think children will enjoy reading this not only because you have good characters but they’ll think about their own family as they read and wonder how no television or working oven would affect them. If I had a suggestion it would be to not begin with Dillon demanding his sister pedal the bike for him. It introduces him as selfish and self centered (and unless that’s what you intended) that’ usually not a good way to introduce your main character. He should be the one struggling to produce enough electricity for an ungrateful sister. Also, unless I missed it, you don’t tell your reader his age; that’s a big way in which readers identify with characters. Either way, this is a great idea for a book. Highly starred and added to my shelf. Wanttobeawriter: Who Killed the President?

I've re-read the first and second chapters. All makes perfect sense - although I've just noticed it was sort of Grace's idea first! She thought of harnessing the power of the corgis in Buckingham Palace. If only she'd said something. Typical older brother gets all the credit... I'm not sure what has changed, but that's a good thing because it means nothing stands out as being new and not fitting. I'm not finished with this book yet! Lucy

Hi Debbie! I've just finished the first chapter, and I really liked it! It's funny and heartwarming :) You're a great writer, reading this was very easy :) I'll be reading the following chapters soon!

CHIRG review and read swap! I've just finished reading your wonderful story- what a brilliant idea for a children's book! The plot is interesting and entertaining, the characters are vivid and believable, and the writing style is perfect for children. It's honestly difficult to fault this; it's well-written with a good balance of description and dialogue and you weave backstory into the narrative without moving away from the plot. This kept me entertained from beginning to end, and has a relevant environmental message which makes it an educational read as well as a good story. Great stuff- highly starred! Emma

What a great story! Fun and quirky but educational too - kids will hopefully understand that electricity doesn't just 'happen' and perhaps learn not to take it for granted! They might also have compassion on those who don't have this easy access to electricity/water and other things we take for granted in the western world. You are a talented writer and the story flows very well. High stars from me and I hope you do really well with this lovely book. Margaret How do I know I know God?

Speedy McCready ought to be on the nursery school green curriculum (if there is such a thing). I can't imagine why hooking up to hamster power is fiction, when it would obviously work so well in real life. Perhaps you should suggest it on one of those Downing Street petitions. If there were 100,000 signatures, it would have to be debated in Parliament. That would be a pretty novel way to promote a hamster-powered novel...

CHIRG Hi Debbie, I thought I’d just hop in and have a look at your book. This is a great read, with lovely, believable characters and an intriguing theme. Below are some chapter-by chapter comments. These are just my opinion, and I’m no expert, so feel free to take what works for you and toss the rest. Ch 1 1) ‘X Box’ In NZ, this is written as a single word, ‘Xbox’ – but maybe that’s just NZ. 2) ‘panted Grace his eight-year-old sister as she’ Commas after ‘Grace’ and ‘sister’ 3) ‘she moaned pushing her’ Comma after ‘moaned’ 4) ‘off of the pedals’ Remove ‘of’ (This might be a kiwi thing) 5) ‘she offered placing’ Comma after ‘offered’ 6) ‘well worn’ Hyphenate 7) I love this concept – and I love the way families have to ‘work’ for their energy – and work together to help each other. A few small things spring to mind, here. Maybe there could have been a spate of kidnappings when the grid first went out (or perhaps still continuing) as people used kids as child-slaves to power their houses? Also, given the ingenuity of the human race – and, in fact, you touched on it yourself with the mention of the corgis – maybe the price of animals (such as dogs, horses and donkeys) and houses with gardens has sky-rocketed as people rig treadmills in their back yards. Maybe there could also be windmills on roof-tops? And there are certainly solar energy devices already in existence. The price of these could sky-rocket. Also, it wasn’t that long ago (in NZ, anyway) that people used alternative fuels for powering their ovens (such as coal-ranges) and I think gas-operated Agas are still around. Maybe there could be a huge run on these in the shops, and people could be creating chimneys and demanding that old coal-mines are revived, or rushing out to buy barbeques. Well, anyway, just a few ideas that you might be able to weave into the story somewhere – or maybe you already have. Ch 2 1) ‘long, thin legs already aware’ Comma after ‘legs’ otherwise it sounds as though his long, thin legs are already aware. 2) ‘our control and no alternative’ Should be something like, ‘our control and there’s no alternative’ 3) If the national grid is being overloaded, then, when people start producing their own energy, the pressure will come off it and it will start working properly again – so won’t there be a base amount of electricity that the government can supply to each household? 4) ‘went out leaving him sitting’ Comma after ‘out’ 5) ‘garbled speech Dillon felt’ Comma after ‘speech’ 6) ‘his head sending’ Comma after ‘head’ 7) ‘announced handing’ Comma after ‘announced’ 8) ‘husband whose dark’ Comma after ‘husband’ 9) ‘McCready at length’ Comma after ‘McCready’, otherwise it sounds as though he spoke at length. 10) ‘set back’ Hyphen 11) ‘tablets for my nose,” he grumbled’ Should be ‘tablets for my nose?” he grumbled’ Ch 3 1) ‘his back trying’ Comma after ‘back’ 2) ‘who like most’ Comma after ‘who’ This is a lovely story. Thoroughly enjoyable. Your writing style is perfect for the age-group you’re aiming for, with a well-balanced mix of narrative and dialogue. Your characterisation is great and your concept is beautifully unique. We take electricity so much for granted these days – especially our children. It’s very clever to get them thinking about what life might be like without it. Highly starred. Sue

This is fantastic! I've gone through the first four chapters. I really like Grace - you've done a great job getting into a kid's head. And the premise is one of the most original and fun I've ever read.

Interesting premise! We Americans would all be much fitter if we lived in your world. You have a way with dialogue; it flows naturally. Being from the South, I particularly enjoyed the English euphemisms.

This is a sweet kids book. I'd have enjoyed it when I was younger. 6 stars!

This is really good writing, Debbie. I'm no expert whatsoever regarding children's writing, but you've managed to write intelligently, while keeping it simple to read. That's a balance many writers struggle to achieve. Your narrative is warm and witty, plus you've got an interesting and original storyline that's wonderfully silly and great fun. I couldn't find any grammatical quibbles, the short paragraphs are very reader-friendly, and I'm not surprised this is attracting big support in a short space of time. I'll keep this on my watchlist, and am happy to give this a genuine six-stars. Well done. I work exclusively with kids - ASD and 'normal(?),' and it's obvious you understand them - ASD or not!

Hi Debbie, Fabulous idea for a children's story - it's one that would really make them think too, about how easy their lives are! Amusing and witty through the first few chapters, I found myself thoroughly entertained, despite the story being aimed at children. The story builds nicely through the chapters and I really feel that this book has heart, enough to do really well. I hope so. I'm putting it on my shelf. Melissa Lessons in the Dark

I'm just a big kid at heart. This one makes me laugh. 6 stars and on my shelf.

Speedy McCreedy--Chirg Review This is a very cute story with a serious message. I really enjoyed the 8 chapters I read. The way this story is told will be really appealing to younger kids, and there are plenty of things they can identify with: the younger sister always in the shadow of her genius brother and the spats and arguments between siblings, for example. I loved your ideas and your writing style. There is a lesson to be taught to kids here, and you do it with humor and without being preachy whatsoever, a fine line to walk. Other than some issues with a lack of commas (an easy enough fix) I found this to be well-edited and very engaging. High stars and a shelf spot for Speedy when a slot opens up! EV

A good read, I must say. I'm not the world's best critic, but I'll try. Normally, children's literature is not my cup of tea, but I found this entertaining. I especially liked the small things, you know, the things that make a story come to life. Such as Dillon's hair standing on end when he gets a bright idea. Keep doing that. It might be a bit on the shorter side, even for a children's book, but that might just be me craving more to read. Good job all the way through. And as a foreigner I can say that there were no places, where I lost my place or failed to understand the meaning. So there's that too.

CHIRG Review. Speedy McCready. Chapter 1 - A really good opening chapter, introducing the family and situation. Some lovely imagery here. 'Couch potatoes in a state of utter shock' made me laugh, also, 'Prince Charles or the Prime Minister's kids couldn't get off of their backsides', bit of a nice, gentle side-swipe adults reading to a child will understand a them and us situation, bound to arise if this does actually ever happen. Chapter 2 - I noticed, following on from the first chapter, you use 'that' a lot when it really isn't needed. I think it slows the flow, so maybe consider cutting 'that' as much as possible. Friction, so often evident between siblings, comes across very well. Chapter 3 - I like the way you are dribbling descriptions of how everyone in the family looks, along with some quirky traits. Much better than hitting the reader with all this information in one go. Chapter 4 - Dillon working on his invention - 'two whole days and nights'. How can he work in the dark without electricity? Maybe explain he's using candles as children tend to pick up on the tiniest things. Chapter 5 - Irrascible, but compliant Grandmother, Grandfather knocked out by a glass of sherry and a secret duel between clashing knitting needles and jigging slippers - all very amusing. Chapter 6 - Dillon making notes in the middle of the night - how does he see to do this? The concept is excellent and so pertinent to the situation society is in at the moment. I'm assuming this is targeted at an audience between the ages of 8 -12? Perhaps younger, if a parent is reading. You've kept the chapters short and sweet, which is a good thing, children won't get bored as you press on to the next thing, stimulating interest to see what happens next. Your characters are very well drawn and you've injected a good sense of a family more than willing to pull together and make the best of what's available, rather than moan about what they're missing. Dialogue is realistic and the prose, often humerous, stops short of being comedic, which, in my opinion would do the story a disservice. Some editing needed, missing speech marks and commas, but these can easily be sorted out. Overall, really charming with some good lessons to be learned, your book should do very well. Highly starred and on my shelf waiting for a space to open up. Nanty - Chrys!

This makes me think of the wave generators in the ocean up in the North in Scotland and in Japan... they use wave power to create electricity... alternative energy sources like wind turbines around here in Northern California... that create their own issues with bird strikes and the like... Very interesting... light hearted but serious... well written, keeps me interested... will gladly finish it as soon as possible... and back it... good premise and relevant as I work my stories on my computer... I've included the problem of dark matter and dark energy in my next story... physicists say once we crack that problem, we will have abudnant energy sources right in front of us... but they haven't worked it out yet...

Here's my review. What a wonderful idea; imagining a life without electricity! And wow how that would affect children, with all their computers and games consoles. Would make a child wonder about how they would cope if it did happen in real life. I like the thought of Dillon meeting the prime minister and the queen. How thrilling! I cannot fault your writing; it flows well and there are no annoying typos. The only constructive criticism would be: in the first chapter it seems to concentrate on Grace's POV, when the MC is Dillon. I would change that chapter in to his POV. Starred highly and intrigued to read more esp about the hamster. KC

Hello Debbie My Sunday evening read was lovely... what innocence, what originality and what a story... perfect... not only did I enjoy it but my fourteen year old mentioned some ideas that would help generate power. How one could combine alternative energy with children's entertainment is definitely a first and deserves more than just a publishing contract. You are creative and imaginative in a realistic and fun way... Just loved it...the story, the ideas, the kids interactions and the flow of the story. Well done and max stars from me... Good Luck with its journey Thanks FC

CHIRG Review What an original idea. It's a lot of fun; I love the rat like PM and the hamster's smug athleticism and the family life is very engaging. Love the idea of Dylan breeding hamsters to power the nation! There's an interesting ecological thought beneath it all though. I wouldn't be at all surprised if it actually happened in the not too distant future. How would we stay on Authonomy? I wonder if fast typing can generate electricity? Seriously, great idea and great children's book. I think this is topical enough to catch a publisher's attention. Lots of stars and staying on my watchlist for the future.

As with many children's books, this one may be read at different levels. It certainly is a satire on our attempts to replace hydrocarbon energy sources with 'alternative' ones. Every time alternative energy becomes competitive with dwindling hydrocarbon supplies, enormous new supplies are discovered...

Debbie: This is GREAT; Absolutely, GREAT! I read every chapter in one sitting. I love the lessons: family connectedness, seeing value in what is around you - even the small things; honesty & integrity, working hard, being diligent, working smart, perserverance, and yes, the truth does win out in the end. All this and so much more captured in this delightful tale. As soon as the current run for the Editor's desk is over (4 more days) I will DEFINITELY be placing Speedy McCready on my shelf.. High stars and a backing - DEFINITELY. Ashara (Like Corns on My Toes)

This is a WONDERFUL book. The strong story has a modern theme with some lovely old school references. The concepts and antics are simultaneously crazy and credible. Superbly written with pace, style and humour. Clever structure ensures an easy read with a vocabulary broad enough to encourage and to educate children. The characters and their relationships are so beautifully drawn, distinctive and believable that even the anthropomorphic elements seem totally natural. I'm hooked!!

A nice change from the norm in children's books and how refreshing. Also might get them thinking about the environment too. There's lots of like and enjoy about this book and it's amusing too. Definitely got my vote and happy to put on my shelf. Best of luck with this.

Hello Debbie-- book- Speedy Mc Cready-- Read the first six chapters and glanced at some more- There are many things to like about this children's story- it's certainly and original humorous story line and love the antics that Dillon and Grace get up to- the dialogue is superbly written making this story fresh and stylish- I feel that you have a winner in your hands here- good luck with it debbie- tom bye- book - from hugs to kisses- please read some of my story, as a boy growing up in Dublin in the 40s , thanks

Debbie, So far I've really enjoyed your book and how you've managed to include a serious global issue in a children's book and keep it age appropriate. And, most importantly so far you're accomplishing the number one goal of any author which is telling a good story. It's a story kids can read but it doesn't over simplify and treat them like unintelligent people. I like what I see and can promise I will be back for more. If your book keeps up the momentum of the first few chapters I will definitely be backing it. Sean

Hi Debbie, I've only read a few chapters so far, but will definitely be back for more! The concept of this book is fantastic and made me smile several times. The brother/sister relationship is excellently portrayed, and Dillon seems an instantly likeable MC! Have backed, and will certainly be back for more! Effie. (We All Fall Down)

Speedy McCready Thought I’d pop back for some more. Ch 8 Well, I’m glad to see Speedy is getting a well-earned break and is getting himself an education at the same time. It’s pretty genius of you to think of all these things. Grace is so sweet to want to take him to the beach - you are very good at capturing the way children think. She’s sort of awkward but with nothing but kind intentions. Ch 9 I like that Dillon considers his teacher to be a fellow scientist, albeit an inferior one. The teacher is so well-described I can smell him. I know when you describe Dolittle as living up to his name you mean he doesn’t do much, but the name seems sort of taken already. I would expect him to be able to talk to animals. I didn’t realise to start with that Dillon was having this conversation with all the other students in the classroom. I suppose I assumed it was after the lesson. Ch 10 “They don’t do hamsters.” is very funny. Made me laugh out loud, and remember the sorts of things my grandparents used to say. I can’t find anything wrong here at all. It continues to be funny, gentle and full of character. Lucy

This is a very good book for children to read. It shows the usual relationship between a brother and his sister which reminds me of me and my sister when we were little kids and use to fight over just about everything. i give it all six stars.

Hi Debbie, Not read it all yet, but what a great story! A great idea with possible environmental links? Your characters are all believable and instantly identifiable as a close knit family. I think for the target age, the chapters are just the right length to deliver in short bursts. Please don't be offended, but I saw similarities in style with mine! :) Looking forward to reading more when I get chance - highest stars awarded!!!! Cheers, Mike. (Rudolf Goes Bananas)

Love the characters and the " talking" that they do is real and intresting. I will back this when my 24 hours of my previous books are up. Love the plot. Keep going and never give up. Best wishes, Chipper Newman

Just started this and it is great fun. I especially liked the concept of the corgis racking up a few energy credits and the way the mother says 'I could give you fifteen minutes' implies both the exhaustion and compromise of family life. I'm W/L this and I'll come and read some more (feeling guilty about the pile of ironing....).

CHIRG review I've read the first eight chapters, and this is a very cute book. I love the name! It's a great 'high-concept' idea, which I'm sure children will find very amusing, and it has a good, family-centred message. Speedy the hamster is particularly brilliant as a character - I love the fact he's hooked on science because his cage is lined with 'Would Be Scientist'! The prose is clear and tight and the dialogue convinces. I agree with keirthomas that the premise - that they have to generate power because the national grid is overloaded - doesn't quite stack up (surely there would still be some power if this was the case? It would just be erratic, not grind to a halt.). It would be good to link it to reality (oil running out, or climate change, or war causing the problem). However, this is really for younger readers and i'm sure they'll just go along for the ride. I'm putting this on my bookshelf...

Very interesting concept which used for the story ! It shows individual's responsibility. I like the way you showed importance of team work of family for power generation. Nice work so far.!

Interesting premise and the execution is, so far, well done. I found myself wanting to read more as I finished the first chapter. Though these types of stories aren't normally what I read, it is a light read. And the idea of living without electricity in a world so dependant on it now, is strange. It's like a continuous blackout (and blackouts themselves are annoying). Overall, a great read so far!

I read the first chapter and instantly wanted to read on. The thought of having to work for electricity is frightening but brilliant. Well written.

Hello Debbie, I was breathless with Grace on the bike and I felt Dillon's frustration at the shortened x box game. Well written and nicely paced. The idea that individuals should have to create their own electricity is brilliant lesson to all of us. High stars and definitely on my Watch List.

I was quite impressed with this and felt.drawn in instantly. You seem to capture the whine and attitude of children very well. The characters were extremely life like. Well done. :)). This was unique and well written. What an imagination you have.

Fun and different. It has a unique style to it and is super well written. New! Shelby Z./Driving Winds P.S. Please take a look at my pirate adventure Driving Winds.

Hi Debbie As requested here's a review of your book. I read the first four chapters, and then skipped ahead to a few chapters later in the book (sorry but I can't read all the book because there are so many to review here on Authonomy!). As I always point out in my reviews, I look at books from a commercial viewpoint and assume that authors are on Authonomy because they want to be a commercial success. So I'm less likely to pick-up on typos and literary nuances, and more likely to suggest changes to make for something more likely to be picked up by publishers. First of all, I should say your book is perhaps the most well-structured book I've seen on Authonomy so far. You know how to keep moving the plot along, and make good use of speech and characters to maintain interest. It is in many ways a good example of a children's story, and follows proven pathways. I like the antiestablishment feeling in the story. I genuinely can imagine David Cameron appearing in front of Downing Street, with Nick Clegg alongside looking sour-faced, as Cameron tells the country they've dropped the ball when it comes to electricity. I'm also reminded of the brown-outs during the 1970s! The trouble I had with the novel is the premise. I appreciate I'm a grown-up but it didn't add-up for me. Wouldn't it have been better to tie-in the lack of electricity to an environmental cause, something that many young people are concerned about and which is very nascent right now? It seems to me that would anchor the story a little more firmly, and give the characters and plot more justification. And I was left with lots of questions: how they could have cheese and pickle for sandwiches, yet have no electricity? Isn't cheese stored in the fridge? How does the food even get delivered if fuel is at a premium (presumably diesel is rationed, otherwise people would just use generators)? Don't expect children to ignore these questions! There's an invisible line of dramatic license and I felt you strayed a little on the wrong side of it with the setup premise. The family could live on a remote island, for example, that has no power. This causes Dilon to solve his energy crisis using rodents, and it transpires this could then be applied to the world—huge success for Dilon! (Although I'm also not sure that kids are going to feel 100% happy about their pets being put to hard work generating electricity—this is another part of the book's premise that rubbed-up against me a little; a way around this would be to have some kind of genetically enhanced superhamster, to whom generating electricity is actually a pleasure.) One big problem here on Authonomy is that lots of people have lovely ideas and premises, but are unable to execute them successfully. In other words, their writing leaves a lot to be desired. I feel the issue for your book is the other way around: you've come-up with a really well-written and well-executed piece of fiction, but the premise needs a good examination and some rejigging. You might need to be a little more sympathetic to how children are likely to view the events in the book. Of course, this is all just my opinion! As always I hope there's some things here that are helpful.

just read some of your book (great title), thought the end of chapter 3, waiting for gran and grandad! :-) was funny, It really made me smile. I am glad that your description states light-hearted as that sums it up so far. I think that kids would love it and adults would appreciate the plot. Well done with this and good luck, i look forward to reading more. Little Miggy x

A truly delightful story with a serious message. It's a great premise and very current (if you'll excuse the pun!) with so much talk of sustainability, the ever increasing cost of oil, etc. Everything about this book smacks of a future children's classic that I can imagine reading to my grandchildren. Excellent stuff, a whole constellation of stars for you. Melanie La Vie en Rosé

CHIRG short review Well done! Enjoyable from the very beginning. Would appeal to kids and families. Made me laugh! On my WL. Will back as soon as I can. Randall The STRIKERZ

Hello Rook, would you like me to comment on your manuscript Speedy McCreedy? It sounds fun and very healthy. Brigitte

This is a great idea for a children's book - but given that the price of electricity keeps going up and the fact that most of the nation seems to be overweight, I'm surprised that someone hasn't already thought of it in the real world!

This is a CHIRG review Speedy McCreedy Well, I can’t fault a pitch like that! Brilliant premise for a children’s story. The front cover is very appealing and kept me reading until that lovely hamster turned up. I like the first chapter - the details about the Christmas dinner and sulky Dillion over his X-Box game are just the sorts of things children would enjoy. I did wonder what’s stopping people from powering things themselves? Surely Grace could pedal herself while watching television and leave Dillion to his grumpy moods? The flashback in the second chapter is well-timed. Much better than putting it first, which is what I would have been (rather boringly) tempted to do. The whole family are described very well, although Dillion isn’t at all likeable at this point! In the third chapter, I love that Grace wants to harness the power of Grandpa’s tapping foot. What a clever girl. Are we sort of stuck in the flashback here? I wouldn’t have expected the time shift to the beginning of the electricity crisis to carry on for more than a couple of chapters. It makes the first chapter seem like a flashforward to a time we might not actually get back to. Ch 7 - one typo in “lightning” - you’ve got an extra ‘e’ in the later occurance of the word. I expected to like this, and I do. Your writing is pretty much error free and has a lovely tone. It’s inventive and original. I’ll star it highly for now, with the intention that it will make it’s way onto my shelf at some point. Lucy

My kids would love this book! And I would love to read it to my couch potato teens! I think your idea is very unique and I feel it is a good message for kids ( to be a little more active and be grateful for all the luxuries we have today). Have given it five stars.

Chapter 4 - You keep the interest going. I laughed when Mr. McCready tried on the shoes. You moved the story along with the paragraph - after a month working on the grid. And the hamster checking out the maze great, but now do you really think their project will pay off. I will read on to see.

I love the title. As I was reading I envisioned the story being accompanied by large and colorful drawings, like the books my school librarian used to read to my class in first grade. This could be one of those books.

A charming story. I am placing this story on my watch list.

Debbie; Regardless of the quality of the writing, the characterisations, the pacing of the story and the enjoyment to read (which were all exceptionally good,) I thought the premise of the story warrants your book going on my WL alone. What an extremely good idea. This makes it believable and at least to kids, whom its aimed at, highly possible. Well done. RMA Sea Spray and Stars

Yes, the dialogue is wonderful. Into the second chapter and the power outage and need to create ones own power - the fall out from that on the family dramatic. You have developed the political attitude between the Prime Minister an now what will happen - "Getting worked up over nothing?" I doubt it and that teases me on to the third chapter. I will continue to read and put it on my shelf. Good read - seems appropriate for youth, but it certainly held my interest. I have limited reading and writing time, but will make time for this Janice

Debbie, Speedy McCready. What a fun title to say out loud. It’s so catchy. And oh, to get off the grid… I love your furry solution. How fun to imagine what life would be like if we really did have to come up with ways to power our luxuries. I could see your book being required reading for elementary aged kids. It’s entertaining, easy to read and educational. The McCready family has just enough quirkiness to make them interesting and lovable. They have just the right mix of family cooperation and rivalry and the reader hopes they’ll succeed in their imaginative endeavor. I’m really impressed with your writing. Clean, smooth and in tune with the contemporary generation. There was one spot in chapter four where I felt you were relying too much on your reader to fill in the blanks. I couldn’t quite picture the whole boot experiment and then I wanted a few more details pertaining to how the hamster grid was constructed and how it was supposed to work. Despite the vagueness, I really enjoyed what I read. I think this will be a big hit with school age kids and adults alike. Have you had any teachers read this? It might be fun to read this in a classroom setting and get kid’s and teacher’s feedback. I could see some fun energy lessons and experiments to be done in conjunction with reading your book. Six stars! Dianna Lanser Nothing But The Blood Here’s a couple easy fixes: Chapter one “I’ve got (a) cramp in my left leg.” Chapter four “Now all I need to do is work out how much (how much) I’m going to charge per unit of energy.”

What a delightful treasure of a story! I can just see this with illustrations (part of me is an artist)! This is bound to become a children's best seller! I loved Dillion and his sister, Mom, and Dad....and laughed out loud at wiring up Grandmom's knitting needles and Grandad's feet. The hamsters are precious. I've only a minor suggestion: for the age group targeted, some of your vocabulary might need to be simplified a bit. There's a repeat of the phrase, "how much" in Chapt. 4 (Dillon says, "Now I need to do is work with how much how much I..." The length of your paragraphs are marvelous for children (and for us adults, too, :-) and your English is perfect (if a little advanced in spots for children). I'm giving you 6 stars for the perfect little book! Blessings, Pat

What a great story, so well told. I noticed a few things have been picked upon by others, so I won't go there. This is a little gem - brilliant dialogue driven characterisation. Good luck Ian

I was delighted to see the cute cover on your book and love the title, the book is wonderful! My husband has been suggesting this for some time to get rid of obesity in schools! Very nicely done, Karen Faking it in France. 6*

I think kids would really enjoy this. tbh I didn't wrm to Dillon at the beginning, but may do so after I read a bit more. Well done. You've already received some useful comments so there's not a great deal for me to add.

Maybe this book should never be published. It could give the government ideas. :-) I found the story delightful and amusing as I imagined this family all taking their turn to peddle away, so each member could have their comfort time. I couldn't help but chuckle as I read on. I like the way you have kept the paragraphs small and manageable, making it easy for youngsters to read and follow. This is a great well written story, which will bring a lot of pleasure to many, young and old alike. Could this be a small typo here - his wet hair dripping front the tip of his ski slope ........... Another little typo in chapter six - he'd even been allowed to look after they one that was kept as a school ..... Enjoyed, and starred. Chris.

l like your easy-to-read narrative style with ecellent description and dialogue too. backed. read SEASONS...

Debbie, I really loved this. It made me laugh. I loved the relationship between Grace and Dillon; they are a typical brother and sister. I loved the fun of it but of course, it has a serious underlying message. Inviting the grandparents around and the picture of grandma knitting was lovely. This has a hint of Roald Dahl. You have a satirical style and so you can get away with the exaggeration. I didn't spot any errors. Well done and best wishes with this. Tracey

I gave you maximum stars

I'm back for more Speedy McCready. The title alone is satisfying

Hi Debbie, I had so much fun reading this book as I really appreciate Brittish humor. The reference to the royals getting off of their backsides made me laugh out loud! This book is not just for kids. I love how you incorporate energy issues in a fun creative way... It's like getting children to eat chocolate covered raisins, the significance of the subject matter slathered in goodness! If only all school books could be written this way how much more could be learned... Even so, I believe your intent was for pure fun pleasure and that it brings. Great fun way to keep kids reading, goog job Mary Ann Agent h. High i stars and watch list

Debbie, Although your pitch gives the impression of a light-hearted, quirky read for kids, I wasn't quite sure what to expect. You have the perfect opening line with Dillon playing on his PS3; one which immediately shows you aren't out of touch with a younger generation. I love how his eight-year-old sister is powering the machine. Dillon's lack of sympathy whilst glued to his PlayStation is (dare I say) spot on. High scores are everything. Poor Grace though, you build up a nice image of her wobbly legs. One minor point, when Grace sits down you switch from PS3 to PS2. I do like the sentence regarding the army of couch potatoes and their microwave dinners. Excellent! I like the idea of the family making agreements between themselves. A sort of bartering system for electricity. You follow that up nicely with pledges for birthday presents. I can't help imagining that in a world powered by exercise, there wouldn't be any issues regarding childhood obesity. Brilliant idea of harnessing the Queen's corgis to a battery store! So far this is a good start . . . Chapter two: I think this is a good place to introduce some back story. Here we have it with the P.M. showing up in the middle of children's television. Has he no idea how important Rastamouse is? Anyway, Mr. McCready's not having a good time. You have natural-sounding dialogue, and I think the families response is a sensible one. I'm intrigued to find out how Dillon's hamster will come into play. Of course, all hamsters like to have a hamster wheel, but considering their size . . . Your writing is very fluent, and whilst there are a couple of typos, these can easily be corrected. In terms of actual story there's really nothing here to criticise. I think this is a book most adults could enjoy reading with their mini-me(s). It's relevant, fun, witty, and contains enough sparks of originality to make it different. Highly starred and placed on my watchlist! Ben - The Frogness of Being

Speedy McGreedy bring out the kid in me. In fact, its good for adult because we get stress and humour reduce stress. This book is packed with humour. The scene with the active hamster remind me of the Green Mile. There 's a active hamster in it

Highly starred. This is brilliant stuff Its fun and a little different. I like the fact that it sends out a message about the environment in a quirky way, its an essential issue today. I have it on my watchlist will read more.

Debbie. I love love love this. It is very funny and a wonderful way to get children to think about energy use in a fun way without being at all preachy. Well Done! There are lots of delightful funny details such as Mr McReady's large feet catching the ground, and him not wanting to go to work smelling like an old lady. I think children will love to hate the evil teacher - genius The only possible problem I picked up on is the occasional use of language that is possibly too advanced for the age range. Examples are - the phrases 'Heir apparant' and 'perpetually dormant, also the word 'aforementioned'. Obviously you don't want to dumb the language down, but a quick read through to check for anything too advanced or - dare I say it - old-fashioned would make this 'practically perfect.' Have you finished it yet because I really want to find out what happens. I have rated this highly and will put it on my bookshelf Best of luck with it Kirstie

Dear Debbie Sorry only getting back to you now, but my pc crashed a few days ago so I'm using my ph and stylus - goung is really very slow. I had an opportunity to finish Speedy McCready and the further I read the more I liked your fluent style which is important for younger readers. I cleary pictured the hamster and his wheel making electricity. You paint a very clear picture. I' m keen to read the rest of the book. Highly rated and remains on my watch list. Hoping to hear from you soon. If you do hve a moment to look at my first attempt to publish I 'd be most grateful to hve comments from a seasoned writer like you. Kindest regards Maretha/African Adventures of Flame,Family,Furry and Feathered Friends

Hi Julia Just read first four chapters of Shadow Jumper. I like the title and think that with the eye-catching front cover it would be very attractive to youngsters on a bookshelf. Yr story has good pace and the dialogue is easy to follow and convincing. I think the drip-feeding of information about Jack's dad is a good hook to keep on reading as well as the knack you have of finishing chapters on a cliff hanger. Will certainly read more and wish you the very best of luck. Have given you many stars. Deebbie

Hi Julia Thanks for letting me know what you thought of Speedy McCready and the typo. Yr comments are very welcome. Will have a chance to look at Shadow Jumper tomorrow. Take care Debbie

I've read the first five chapters and think this is very good. It's entertaining, has unique subject matter and is pitched just right for children. I love the idea of having to create your own electricity and the children thinking of novel ways of doing that. I noticed a typo at the end of the fifth chapter (last sentence - should it say it rather than in?) but other than that it is very clean. You have obviously spent a great deal of time on your story. All the best with your writing. Highly starred and a recommended read! Julia Shadow Jumper

Hi Tod Thank you for reading Speedy McCready - glad you liked it. Will Take a look at The Lost Wink . Debbie

This is very entertaining! I would expect it would capture kids' imaginations. The title has a nice ring to it, and the voice and language are right on target. Best of luck with this! Tod Schneider The Lost Wink

Hello Kenneth Thank you for ypour very welcome comments on Speedy McCready. I am glad you like the idea of a National Grid powered by people on exercise bikes! You never know, it may yet catch on! Thanks again Debbie

[QUOTE] Debbie, A children's book with grownup appeal "Speedy McReady." The language is simple and easy to follow, the dialogue realistic with much humour, not only compatible with those below a certain height level, but also those above. The premise of everyone being required to go on the exercise bike to help make up for the failings of the Nationa Grid is truly inspired and should be made national policy. Pedal power rules. Thank you so much for the inspiration. Kenneth Edward Lim The North Korean [ENDQUOTE]

Debbie, A children's book with grownup appeal "Speedy McReady." The language is simple and easy to follow, the dialogue realistic with much humour, not only compatible with those below a certain height level, but also those above. The premise of everyone being required to go on the exercise bike to help make up for the failings of the Nationa Grid is truly inspired and should be made national policy. Pedal power rules. Thank you so much for the inspiration. Kenneth Edward Lim The North Korean

Hi Faith Thank you for taking the time to look at Speedy McCready and for yr comments. I have read the first 2 chapters of yr book and found it very engaging. Can picture the' outing' very clearly as I work with children on the autistic spectrum and know what lengths we have to go to when going out on trips! Will definitely read more of yr book. Debbie

[QUOTE] Dear Debbie, I love your title and your opening chapter! What a fun, creative piece for children. You have such a perfect premise for our electricity-dependent society! :) I can only imagine how this story will unfold as Dillon, Grace, Mum, and Dad literally pedal for their luxuries. It is such a pleasure to find such a fresh, imaginative piece. I look forward to reading on. Giving you many stars and wishing you every success. All the very best, Faith Rose Now To Him [ENDQUOTE]

Dear Debbie, I love your title and your opening chapter! What a fun, creative piece for children. You have such a perfect premise for our electricity-dependent society! :) I can only imagine how this story will unfold as Dillon, Grace, Mum, and Dad literally pedal for their luxuries. It is such a pleasure to find such a fresh, imaginative piece. I look forward to reading on. Giving you many stars and wishing you every success. All the very best, Faith Rose Now To Him

Dear Debbie What an original idea for a book, and so funny. I laughed out loud at the thought of mum and her roast potatoes. This story is a gem. Your observation of the family feels sympathetic and realistic. I like the idea of brainy kids giving everyone good ideas. And yes, this is a great way to demonstrate the value of electricity. I hope this does well. It certainly deserves to. And, as an added bonus, the MS is clean and easy to read, so that I could just enjoy the six chapters I read. All the best Fran Macilvey :-))

Debbie, here for our reading swap and very glad I came! This is a brilliant premise for a story and very clearly imagined. The first scene was well chosen to really make children think about how much electricity they use. The dialogue is realistic and the voices of the children feel authentic. It's funny (love the PM wiping his nose on his cuff on national TV!) and inventive. Just a couple little niggles... 1) Wasn't quite sure of the ages of the children. I could guess, but you might want to pop it in somewhere (subtly), it helps to build up a picture of them in our minds. 2) Your point of view shifts around a bit within your third person narrative, sometimes Dillon, sometimes Grace, which is fine. But "Those days had gone leaving an army of couch potatoes..." sounds like the author narrating not the kids and too much flipping from one POV to another makes it harder to read. It worked better for me when you stuck to the 'voice' of the children, I want to know how they would describe the change, not an adult! It's more interesting that way, for your intended audience as well!! These are small niggles though and easily fixed. 5 stars from me! Sharda. Here's the link to mine when you get the chance. No pressure. http://www.authonomy.com/books/42835/mr-unusually-s-circus-of-dreams/