I've just read the prologue and chapter one, and think it's a strong start that compels me to read more. A few things beyond grammar that I've noticed: (1) the "Gods" just seems too generic a term. Your character Adrianna clearly is devoted to them, and to be so abstract and distant to "the Gods"... view book

Hi Alan, I appreciated your excellent review/edit of my work so much, I thought I'd check out yours. I've only read one chapter so far, but plan to read more after this (I never write comments "later"). Being in recovery from addiction myself, I find myself being caught up in the story, and actua... view book

Hello, Thanks for your comments on my book; I'm glad you're enjoying the read. I'm also enjoying your read, having finished the first 5 chapters, I find the subject one I definitely sympathize with. Since it looks like you've already received a lot of positive feedback and know your strengths... view book

Yeah, I mean it's clear you got a ton of talent. My first impressions as a reader are that you are on THE VERGE of brilliance. On the cusp of it, but still teetering between too much vague description that reads as just that, as opposed to controlled and intriguing spaciousness in description (loo... view book

Yeah, this is pretty good, and you can see where attention to detail was given. The thing that is missing from making this a complete hook for me is a more compelling break up in the narrative. It seems a bit sporadic, and could use a bit of filtering, putting the most attention grabbing aspects a... view book