auroranemesis recent comments

written 785 days ago
cherry

Really humorous start to the story, loved the names of the places and people you chose.
You have a lyrical flow to your writing, and it comes across in a soft conversational way, which I like a lot.
Your characters are colourful and vibrant. This and the dialogue ass feeling and pace to the text.
‘Best porcelain sunlight’
‘Spider’s gossamer glinting.’
Two very good pieces of description, that add a light almost fairytale effect to narrative.
This is going to be a popular book.
Well done, enjoyed the read.
Have rated 5*.
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written 789 days ago
cherry

Hiya again Angela.
Good beginning, sounds like me at the moment.
Love the sentence
'Very few things are close to my heart and so writing this book is like copying and pasting me onto the paper.’
Written like an author.
Great introduction, leaving the reader with an interesting question to reason upon.
I too wanted to be Zena the warrior princess, so with you there.
Try reader the first few chapters of ‘Cider with Rosie’ Laurie Lee, you have his eye for description.
Like how your writing changes from the innocence of childhood, to the demons of the world around you.
Your writing flows and are excellent with your use of the written word.
Throughout there is an innocence and the waiting for something. This book is your search and you share it with your reader.
I was drawn in and had instant empathy for you.
You use the bible and speech of God and your believes and how you found them, but you are not preachy. This makes your book good as you are letting the readers explore for themselves.
This book is on my wish list and I have rated it high.
Well done, a joy to read.
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written 790 days ago
cherry

Erie start, with some very good description. Like the hammer horrors, that scared me when I was younger.
Excellent use of imagery and it uses all of the reader’s senses. Drawing them in like a fly in a web.
I started to feel dread, knowing death was close, and was wondering what would happen next.
There is tension, atmosphere, and this to your enticing style of writing, a good mixture that works well.
I love the use of the colour red and how you varied it. Like Blood-heat-pain, this shows you have a very good grasp of the written language.
This story has a lot of potential and you know your market and your readers well.
String scenes and devilish characters.
Well done.
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written 791 days ago
cherry

Yarg review.
Excellent start, you set the mood and hook the reader in.

You move the reader on with a mixture of action and suspense.
Dialogue nicely woven in creating dynamic scenes, which introduce the characters.
Love the end of the first chapter, how could a person not carry on reading.
Your style of writing is almost nightmarish; this is said as a compliment.
It’s surreal macabre, all you would expect from this genre.
Then you dive into normality, leaving us with unanswered questions- Great.
Your use of the written word is sharp and impressive, I feel like I have been put on a rollercoaster ride.
This is the kind of story you would read at night, and then sleep with the light on.
This book grows and grows and you give it an interesting voice.
Really enjoyed.
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written 791 days ago
cherry

A strong book, excellently written.
You lead us on a journey that is full of demons and spiritual light.
Your words are strong and fascinating and give a person much to think about. It certainly did me.
You don’t come over as condescending or patronising, even though some of the contents is dark.
The book has a good strong flow and the pitch, pace and power are just right.
I cannot say I am knowledgeable on these things, but I can say I enjoyed what you
You have searched deep into your self and have found a strong voice full of conviction and grace.
You wrote about and understood what you were trying to say. And its proves a convincing read for all.
Well done.
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written 794 days ago
cherry


Yarg review
Great opening chapter, that builds up into a crescendo.

Strong, believable characters, like Brian.
You keep the reader interested with a good fluent plot.
Very colourful descriptions that add dimension to the narrative, you have an interesting imagination.
A natural storyteller and a promising story.
Well done.
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written 794 days ago
cherry

Yarg Review
Loved the prologue as it set the scene well, creating a mystical feel to the piece.
You jump straight into the action, setting a good pace for the story, and getting the reader interested straight away.
I had empathy for your characters immediately; this creates a connection and makes them feel real.
You are a natural storyteller and your writing is soft and fluent, almost poetic.
The hooks you place in the text pulls the reader deeper into the plot and you are compelled to continue.
A good piece of literature, with a lot of promise.
Well done.
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written 795 days ago
cherry

Strong start to story that goes straight into action.
Good use of description in fourth Paragraph.
Language fits genre and the plot, but no so as to over face the text and stop you reading.
Very fluent feel to whole of first chapter.
You have set the scene well, inviting the reader with tempting hooks that pull us into the next chapter.
A soft and sentimental read that flows with a dream like quality, even though it shows the harshness of life in the past.
You have done your homework and researched your chosen market well.
The characters are believable and you instantly empathize with the protagonist.
Will continue reading and will rate high.
WELL DONE XXXX.
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written 799 days ago
cherry

Loved Mama Lorna’s description of making the scones, it made my mouth water.
All the characters are strong and different, yet they fit together well and enhance the text.
I felt empathy for them and the harshness of their lives, you brought this across well in your writing.
I especially liked the paragraph that described her relations village, where nothing grew longer than a year old height and all were married before they were twelve.
You draw a wonderful and sometimes sad picture of this women and her family’s life, but put it across in an almost dream like way. The last bit made me smile, I really wanted the best for Gaudencia and she got it despite the lizard.
A lovely first story that makes me wants to read on and I will.
Well done a fluent and dazzling set of stories.
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written 799 days ago
cherry

Yarg review
Strong start with descriptions that draw a great picture.
Liked the introduction of the girl in Para 2.
Leather flapping swished past.. Good use of onomatopoeia.
Golden orbs, a great description of dragon’s eyes, piercing and evil.
Brilliant use of imagination, you paint a world that is different, yet believable.
Dialogue is just right and aids the progression of the piece, which leads you deeper and deeper into the plot.
I like the protagonist; she is fiery and strong, better for fighting this large menacing dragon. It is David versus goliath, with dragons.
Really enjoyed this and will continue to read.
Well done.
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written 799 days ago
cherry

Yarg
Lila peered around the corner of a tall house, the stone walls damp and coarse under her fingers. To her relief the street was empty. All she could see was an abandoned fish cart with flies buzzing lazily around it and a stray mutt scratching for scraps of food in a heap of rubbish in an alley.
An excellent start that really draws me in. The description is fluent and I like the attack on your senses. The way they humiliated willow by cutting her hair, the clink of metal. I like the character Lila and the Le Fey is an excellent choice as being descended from the fey or fairies add magic to the text.
Your writing is dynamic and you lead well into each chapter, with tempting little hooks and questions, that need to be answered. I feel this would be a good read for all ages, and I have to confess sometimes the books are better.
The voice in this book is strong and the whole language is sharp.
Really enjoyed. Well done. Yarg review view book

written 800 days ago
cherry

A great read, with a strong and interesting story.
I think the story is the most important part of the book.
This shows you are a natural storyteller.
Your language is good and the story flows.
Enjoyed what I read and will recommend to others.
Well done view book

written 800 days ago
cherry

A fast pacy story with a lot of strength. Great characters that add dimension to the text. The plot is well thought put and excellently written. Your writing draws the reader in and you are hungry for the next page. You are a natural story teller who has really thought this story out. I really liked this stor. Well done. view book

written 803 days ago
cherry

A great read, with a strong and interesting story.
I think the story is the most important part of the book.
This shows you are a natural storyteller.
Your language is good and the story flows.
Enjoyed what I read and will recommend to others.
Well done view book

written 803 days ago
cherry

An enchanting story, wrote with real feeling and an understanding of your characters.
You are at ease with your storytelling techniques.
The pace flows beautifully and the POV is perfect, and makes the story more captivating.
Your description is enthralling and the dialogue is gripping.
You end each chapter with a riveting hook that makes the reader turn the page wanting more of the feeling you convey in your lines.
I can see your feeling run deep with the writing of this book and it shows in the finished piece.
Well done, I have rated this very highly and would recommend it to others.
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written 805 days ago
cherry

Yarg Review
Strong beginning, with a good plot and pitch.
Brilliant narrative, flecked with golden dialogue and jewel encrusted description.
Fluent and lyrical, quick and staccato.
Good hooks to draw reader into next chapter.
Language convincing and characters too.
Time difference easy to believe and well researched.
Liked this a lot.
Well done.
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written 805 days ago
cherry

A delicious read, with a very strong opening.
You’re writing flows well and you seem at ease with your writing style.
Our characters are first rate and add colour and dimension to your scenes.
A colourful dialogue with a staccato feel, that draws the writing on.
Good ending on your chapters lead you on to reading the next chapter
I enjoyed reading and would recommend.
Well done. view book

written 807 days ago
cherry

The plot twists are inventive, making the book unpredictable and fun to read.
prose is solidly descriptive
Each page had me gripped to the very end, with very strong characters, writing.
Every time you reach a full stop you crave for another sentence. You could read this from the breakfast table right to bed!
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written 810 days ago
cherry

Yarg review.

An enchanting story, wrote with real feeling and an understanding of your characters.
You are at ease with your storytelling techniques.
The pace flows beautifully and the POV is perfect, and makes the story more captivating.
Your description is enthralling and the dialogue is gripping.
You end each chapter with a riveting hook that makes the reader turn the page wanting more of the feeling you convey in your lines.
I can see your feeling run deep with the writing of this book and it shows in the finished piece.
Well done, I have rated this very highly and would recommend it to others.
xx
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written 811 days ago
cherry

Yarg review

Wow, what a piece.

Strong and fast flowing, with a good pace.
I can see why young readers would be draw to this.
Colourful character with enough dialogue to keep up the read.
Nice hook at end of chapters that make you want to carry on reading.
Yes, I like this, well done view book