Hi David,

I do like football so this was an enjoyable read. Although Jack isn't the most likeable character initially, I found his journey and the descriptions amidst it all interesting. I'm happy to shelve it as I think it's a good story.

Best wishes, Nikki view book

Hi Jo,

sorry it's taken me a while to get to this.

I enjoyed the read though! It's a good thriller with some strong characters. There's obviously a lot of back story here, which leaves a lot to be covered later on.

Although a good read, I did find that sometimes the descriptions made me stumble a little. They could be cut down a little in places and physical action used instead.

Good luck with this! view book

Hi Kenneth,

I enjoyed your main character. And the whole premise is great. Generally a really original piece and written well. My own problem- I don't really understand the whole lizard part! And almost why it was neccesary as seeing yourself in a porn clip is disturbing enough!
Good stuff though and really happy to support this.

Nikki (Ellipsis) view book

Hi Jason,

some strong characters here.Although I didn't like Mary very much, I did want to find out why Thom feels she never really loved him properly. Interesting stuff. The narration kept me reading more. I also liked the dynamic between Vicky and Thom. Good stuff. Dialogue was pretty sharp throughout.

One point- is this in chronological order? At some points, I think I lost sense of time.

Really happy to shelve this. Nikki (Ellipsis) view book

Hi Kev,

this is a good crime novel with attitude.

Not too much to say reallt but shelving now!

Nikki view book

Hi Steve,

this is an enjoyable read. I like Christina's character and although the first few chapters has a lot of info in, you do this quite well. The trauma she faces as a child is written well and believably. A quick turn on the shelf.

All the best with this, Nikki (Ellipsis) view book

Whoops, meant to write my comments here!

Good story and good characters, I enjoyed reading this. So I'm happy to shelve.

Like I said, I do wonder if the two characters will ever meet, they seem rather different but who knows?! view book

Hi Jared,

this instantly strikes me as a well written novel. The descriptions are really intricate but not too overloaded. Marcus is definitely a scary bastard! I think late in the novel, you will probably reveal a bit more about his past. He seems completely psychotic from the initial chapters.

Donna seems interesting too. Both closely linked to death.

A few things:

I think you need to seperate the varying perspectives in the chapters. Marcus and Donna seem to have a few paras each, without any indication viewpoint is changing. So just fix that is you can.

My other huge problem- the font is far too small! I relaly wanted to read more but on the screen, this hurt my eyes and although I wanted to read on, I couldn't. This is too good a novel to be discarded because of a simple font issue.

I'm shelving this now- great stuff!

Nikki (Ellipsis) view book

Hi Simon,

you know your stuff, that's for sure! Reading this, I could see how much research and effort went into this. Of course I have read Shakespeare and studied it at various levels, but I would still have no concept of accuracy regarding all this histroy. Very intriguing though.

I did find the amount of names a bit overwhelming, therefore got a bit lost. Perhaps this was also because the chapters seems a little long with a lot of info packed in.

I think this is a good piece of work though. Happy to shelve.

All the best, Nikki view book

Hi Mike,

this is slightly unconventional, which I found I enjoyed. The narrator has a strange style of narrating, which is both interesting and sometimes juvenile. After all, she is fifteen/sixteen? This is why it works. Also you feel she will learn a lot through the course of the story.

It almost felt like it was set several decades ago though, which was strange as I thought from the pitch that it sounded like it was set in the future? I'm a bit unclear here. Perhaps more clarification on the times as the phone Barney uses seems a bit unclear, the nuns and Linda's mum also seema bit old fashioned in some senses.

Interesting style though and clearly a lot of wrongs to be put right. I found myself enjoying this.

So in conclusion, happy to shelve! Nikki (Ellipsis) view book

Hi Sara,

this is a good thriller. The characters are strong and the story is good. There's a lot of nasty stuff going on! Really good page turner.

My only issue- perhaps a few more times you could invest more emotion in the action. I sometimes felt I was told how people were feeling, rather than showing through their expressions, gestures or actions

Happy to back this and thanks for suggesting a swap! GOOD LUCK! view book

Hi JD,

this is refreshingly different in the same way Sex and the City is good- a woman talking about and having sex. And the sex is generally written well, if not a bit too over zealous on Sam's part at times! It was also refreshing seeing into a marriage from a man's point of view, a more sensitive man as well. However, I did find Sam's lack of guilt and willingness to shag any number of man slightly unbelievable at times. Simply as a woman, that's all.

I will shelve this but I think you could work on Sam a little.

Best, Nikki view book

Hi Bob,

what can I say- good characters, well written, dialogue almost spot on and story flowing well. All round successful here and definitely better than some I have seen in the shops!

A few quibbles- I am confused by the first chapter. Is this the past, the future or the present? Is the woman mentioned again later in the novel?

Also- it's a little strange to call Elliot by his surname throughout as it creates distance from the readers but this isn't major, just something to think about.

Overall, really pleased to have read this. Shelved and will be kept in my rotating bookshelf.

Looking forward to your comments also. Nikki (Ellipsis) view book

Hi Robert,

Lines of Control is a well-written crime/thriller. I can't really fault it. Perhaps a minor quibble is chapter 2- there seemed to be a lot of terms (job titles) mentioned here but this isn't that much of an issue. Good dialogue, good characters and a good story to pursue.

Only other quibble is I think the pitch could be a bit more succint and direct. Perhaps a few of the sentences are too long. Also, the font is a bit hard to read on screen! But that's probably just me.

Overall, much enjoyed and happy to shelve.

Nikki (Ellipsis) view book

Hiya Philip,

I've just read several of your stories. I can see you write well but I couldn't help wanting a bit more spice and connection throughout. For example, the story entitled 'Love me Love my Rat' is full of sparring between the two characters, whereas the first story has elongated conversation which loses some of it's impact. Also is there no way to connect all of them? I think this is always advisable in short story collections- perhaps an image, a phrase, an object could all appear in them. Not sure, just making suggestions.

I'll shelve this, and wish you all the best.

Nikki (Ellipsis) view book

Dear David,

Green Ore is not usually what I would pick up but I found it a good read! First off, I'm happy to shelve as you are clearly a talented writer.

Looking over the feedback from others, it finally struck me what my only issue was: I think a bit more emotive language could really build on this already good set of characters and story, and just give it that final edge. Perhaps a few more gestures of fear, apprehension, excitement, adrenaline- whatever!

Olwud and Judd are great companions though and you've managed to make Judd seem human, which is a nice touch which works well.

All the best with this David! view book

Hi Sheryl,

good alternate story here. The first chapter is great, although some description could be cut perhaps. Otherwise good stuff throughout here. Sometimes slightly too much telling of how people feel, just show it through actions or expressions sometimes.

Otherwise this is a strong piece and I'm happy to shelve. Hope you make the shelf!

Best, Nikki view book

Hiya Tom,

great stuff! Such an easy read as it flows really well. Nick is a likable character and the dialogue is dealt with well. Lots of intrigue, not only about this strange future but also Nick's family life.

Happy to shelve! Best, Nikki view book

Hi Ian,

I enjoyed this read. It was well-written and I wanted to keep going with it.

The characters are good and the story is really intriguing.

I don't have any suggestions for improvement, I was merely reading this, which I guess is a good thing!

Shelving. All the best, Nikki view book

Hi NSL-

this isn't my type of novel but I can tell it's well written and I'm sure people will relate to the characters.

All the best NSL and I'm shelving now.

Kind regards, Nikki view book