609 days ago
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I was absolutely riveted to this first chapter. I think I even forgot where I was for a while. I didn’t actually notice any mistakes; I was just swept away by the story and by your skill as a writer. I will definitely read more later. Good luck and backed.
You have a fantastic imagination and sense of story but you do need to work on the mechanics of writing. You do have a very good story here and it would be a shame to let it down for the want of some polishing up. I attended a writing course which helped me a great deal. There are also a lot of good...
I like the beginning with the bells, and the cat taking us through the streets and history of the city – leading us on into the story. The dimly lit room with the man and the girl. She has a gift of sight into what is to be. Good end to the chapter with the tall man and the promise of what Esrella s...
OK. Not only is this hilarious, it is very well written - easy to read, great characterization, good dialogue. On top of that the storyline is unusual. Great opening too BTW. Thumbs up. I would buy this if I flipped it open in a bookshop and read the first paragraph. GPJ
A heartwarming story. I always had horses when I was young and you really seem to have caught their essence. I can see a lot of young girls loving this book. Good luck with it. GJ