I am speechless over your story. You are so very brave and honest and I am quite sure that by sharing this with the world you will help others and also help yourself completely heal. I wish you the best with this. view book

What an amazing writer you are! I started the first chapter expecting to read just a few paragraphs and twelve chapters later and my morning blown- I just want more of this. Penny is such an endearing character - and Dr. Paul is the sort of man that everyone would love as a father or uncle. The only character I had difficulty with was Lacey - she doesn't ring true as a "virgin" in fact she comes across as a slut in some parts and I am not sure if this was your intention. We know she is obviously up to something along the lines of snagging herself a doctor but if we are supposed to like her in the end then I don't believe this will read genuine - otherwise all the other characters are amazingly portrayed for the reader and likable.

I have to agree with another comment that Dr. Paul really did seem to be in love with Penny a little too quickly - having not seen her in so long I would think he would proceed cautiously even after he discovered the abuse. Perhaps as suggested the relationship can grow slowly over time or perhaps hint that over the year he hadn't seen her he still left food bundles and toys for her at her home - I don't know but gestures that would show a slow love for her as one would a child they took in - he is certainly caring enough that's for sure.

I would have also appreciated a little bit of a time reference - you do setting so well but I was hard pressed to know if this was deep south in the early 1900s or much later. Lack of reference to technology makes it confusing as to decade. Did I miss something??

Anyway, this is just my little old opinion and I still would buy this book just based on the first few paragraphs I read. It has a slow burn to it that kept me turning the pages and now has me clamoring for more!
Absolutely let me know when you post more. Gorgeous prose and wonderful authentic dialogue make this a very beautiful, heart-wrenching story so far.

Best of luck - highly starred and on my shelf.
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I so enjoy your writing, Joe. I see you as the sort of author with a cult following and iconic when you leave this Earth. Thanks, as always, for the shear entertaining romp! view book

This has a very strong start and hoping it continues in that same vein. You have a talent for hooking the reader. On my shelf and starred! view book

I am enjoying your writing style so much. I love the way you open this with the pregnant girl and the stern father. Kate's internal dialogue reveals much about who she is and who she wants to be - her reactions to the new baby are so genuine as imagine any mom would be wanting to protect her newborn but knowing she will not be able to with such a mean, abusive father. I am anxious to read more and find out how all this turns out. As far as any nit-pics, I notice you begin with the story as Kate in third person and then you switch to first person - not sure if that is intentional but it did cause me to stop reading and backtrack. You also switch POV in CH 1 right before Kate falls at her mother's feet - she speaks from the mother's standpoint for that one sentence. "As her mother gazes..." suggests she knows what her mother is thinking. That is an easy fix. Otherwise, go through the manuscript and remove as many "had" and "that" as possible so they don't bog down the prose - they are unnecessary words we all over use. A little bit of work on your pitches will attract more readers I believe because this is a book not to be missed and the pitches to me are not strong enough attention grabbers!

So glad someone mentioned this book in the forums - I'll be back for more but for now you are on my shelf with high stars! Liz view book

I can so relate to this - I adopted my daughter in 2000 and she is now an adult but it was an incredibly eye-opening experience of the damage that can be done at such a young age. I applaud you for your courage in writing this book and I know when I get further into the story, I will want to know how it ends. Well written so far and told with sincerity. liz view book

Poignant, beautiful and often too sophisticated for the likes of me. This is something for the bedside- best savoured over time. I look forward to reading more but on my shelf already! view book

You are a master at dialogue - I like the ease with which your characters converse. I still have a ways to go but wanted to stop for a moment to shelf and comment. Liz view book

I have shelved this book and (highest) starred it - not only because it is written in gorgeous prose but it is also very cutting edge - a poignant and satisfying read so far. liz view book

This is superb writing! As I read the first chapter I felt as though I had just bought the book at B&N - it is that polished and well-written. I have only read chapter one but will comment further and in detail when I read what is uploaded. Welcome and thanks for sharing your excellent work with us. view book

Excellent pitches that promise to make for a riveting read! Will comment more after the first few chapters but on my shelf because based on pitches I'd buy it! Liz view book

So far from what I've read this is going to do very well on Authonomy. Quite compelling and promises to be a page-turner. I will message you my specific comments in a day or so, otherwise - this is on my shelf! Well done. Starred high as well.

Liz
The Cheech Room view book

I truly love this book - so frigging funny!

Liz view book

I really love this so far - the way you build the suspense in the first chapter, making the reader wonder where the heck this void is and what will happen next. Nice hook at then end. I'm headed back to read chapter two but on my shelf for now! Liz view book

This is quite insightful - an important read - on my shelf tomorrow! liz view book

Just finished reading your first three chapters, Joe, and there is nothing not to like about this. While many books have you turning the pages to see what happens next, this is a book to be enjoyed in the moment. Every bit of what I have read so far is so well constructed and polished that it makes for a very smooth read. You make it so easy to picture the players here - I love how you set up your mom abruptly taking your bike away when you were 8 and already getting mischeivious. I imagine your mom will come back on the scene at some point. And Spud is hilarious. The ride on the elephant is so damn well written that I was there - up on the paciderm myself under the mesh of electrical wires and over the cacophany of the bizar. I believe this is beyond memoir, because you take us on a ride and you as the writer are right along there next to us. It is a memoir that reads like great fiction. There is a movie quality to this - like a Fear and Loathing or Rum Diaries. If the computer would let me shelve this again, I would. I am giving this book six stars! Liz view book

OMG - I'm sitting here crying over Looking Back through your Music Box - so well written - simply and heartbreaking! I promise to read the others - just picked this one randomly - will comment more later but on my shelf for now and highly starred.

liz
The Cheech Room view book

So far this is easy to support - your writing is quite deep and with a magical feel that makes for great fantasy fiction, the kind I am jealous I cannot write. I realize it doesn't make-up for the impersonal i-phone message you recieved from the agent but I have shelved your book and will comment more when I have read more and looked up some of your words in the dictionary. :)

Liz
The Cheech Room view book

I am in love with this book. I used to sing my kids a song about a Kookaburra when they were babies to put them to sleep. I didn't even know what a kookaberra was until just now. This adorable story gave me goosebumps so far! My only issue is I want to read more. Shelved and top starred.

Liz
The Cheech Room view book

This is a compelling read so far - it is certainly a character driven story and you have real writing talent. It is also refreshing to read a novel without dragons and ghouls but rather real life issues that can be far scarier. Well done and backed.

Liz
The Cheech Room view book