WHAT AN AMAZING opening. the hook at the end of your first chapter is quite breathtaking and this bodes well for the rest of the book and i'm delighted to put this on my shelf. xx m THE ETON MOTHERS' HANDBOOK view book

wilf, i love your writing. this is well up to standard. funny, gripping, novel and very literate. lovely work. backed. xx m THE ETON MOTHERS' HANDBOOK view book

yes, there is a little editing needed (and a better pitch) but this is strong story-telling and i'm delighted to back your book. xx m THE ETON MOTHERS' HANDBOOK view book

first of all, you MUST change your short pitch and miss out the words 'that will be yours one day'. the sentence has much more kick without it. nice opening chapter - all the angst of being a teenager plus the spaceship angle. the israeli delegation is a great touch. shelved. xx m THE ETON MO... view book

there is some nice writing here but IMO you need to hold your characters differently for your reader to relate to them. 'the boy' goes on for far too long in chapter one and then chapter two starts with 'the girl'. i really think you need to change this. also your sentences in chapter one are too si... view book