elires1067 recent comments

written 1373 days ago
cherry

I am really enjoying this story! Strong characters, great storyline. Truly gripping from chapter 1 through chapter 10.

Great job, Matt!
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written 1382 days ago
cherry

Read it beginning to end. What an amazing story! There are a few spots that bogged me down a bit, but what a great story! I could hear the wheels turning in Holly's head as she prepared that second wish. I was right there with her as she was cleaning out the tub from the boys. It was really a great read!

Good luck! view book

written 1391 days ago
cherry

Interesting story line. It's a good story, but reads like a clinician's detailed report. It needs more feeling, more passion, life.
This could really be a great book with just a little more umph in it.

Good luck! view book

written 1392 days ago
cherry

I must have missed something...Who wrote these quotes? It says in the pitch that you 'found them' but in 13 pages I couldn't find a single author name.
I've always wanted to do a collection of quotes, but didn't because you need to get permission.
I do wish you luck, but please add author names to the individual quotes. view book

written 1399 days ago
cherry

Just my kind of intrigue! I like it. I noticed some typos and word awkwardness, but nothing that couldn't be fixed easily enough.

The only puzzling thing that wasn't explained is how the scrolls ended up there? Perhaps later in your story that comes in?

How close are you to finishing? I certainly am interested in reading more.

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written 1400 days ago
cherry

HONEST FEEDBACK TO FOLLOW:

Short pitch: Shorten it. Tell me what the book is about, not the tags. There is a place where they go and it's not on your pitch.

Long pitch: You wrote: "My father molested my older sister since she was a baby, raped her from age five, threatening death to her and family, if she told. 1947, told at age eleven. He was imprisoned. Raped her lots 1970 until my twin brother threatened him."
If he threatened death to her family, wouldn't it be to your family to? If she told at 11 and he was imprisoned, then how could he rape her? Or is this just redundant?

You wrote: "Granny raped by her father, so Mama and her brother were born. Granny castrated her father after he raped Mama when she was fifteen, birthed a son, put up for adoption, a secret until Mama was dying of cancer at age seventy-three, searched, found him, then told us six siblings."
Again I am confused. Why would your granny allow her father to see the kids? If he was the father, she knew he was a rapist. Why subject your teen daughter to that? Who searched for your brother, you or your mother? Again, not clear...

Sadnessess? Is that a word? My spell checker can't find it...

You jump around way too much! From when you were tiny? What age is tiny? Why not start there?

Your pitch is disorganized, wavering, and unclear.

Start off with some action, or why I should read the book. Make it a SALES PITCH, not just ramblings.

Good luck with your book. Please take a look at MY book, Pathways: Surviving Life's Storms. It is a true story about the mix ups we often find ourselves in and how we can get out of them.

Hope this helps!

Eley view book

written 1400 days ago
cherry

Dear ____________, I love your ____________________ because they usually _______________.Your pitch is excellent, so set the hook for me to read your book. :) When you use short paragraphs & lots of dialogue, it makes me want to keep reading to find out what's going to happen next. I'm backing your book. :)
Could you please take a moment to back my ____________ books? Thanks, Eley :)

This is information from authonomy (so beware of any other untrue information you may receive that is spam & not quotes of authonomy):
"When you back a book, it only improves the ranking of that book, not yours. However, the author whose book you are backing may decide to back your book also, in which case yes, your ranking would be improved"...authonomy quote.
"Every time you place a book on your bookshelf, your recommendation pushes the book up the rankings. And while that book sits on your bookshelf, your reputation as a talent spotter increases depending on how well that book performs.
backed :)
Love, Eley:) view book

written 1401 days ago
cherry

This is great! Bloody brilliant!
Caught my eye as I wrote my book in 32 days. I only intended to take a peek, but finished it still grinning.

Thank you for sharing the story.

Eley view book

written 1401 days ago
cherry

Although this genre is usually not my cup of tea, I enjoyed the read. You brought your characters to life. The story was well written and interesting throughout.

Good luck!

Eley view book

written 1401 days ago
cherry

What an interesting collection...I enjoyed the stories (well most of them), thought provoking, deranged. The characters can be felt and understood.
Well done.

Eley view book

written 1401 days ago
cherry

This is just classic! Of course I began reading it to my teenage son when you were talking about listening to mothers...Only got him hooked so he stayed for the rest of the read.
How funny! I laughed my arse off!

Uncle John, uncle John, can you tell me another one?

Anyway, thanks for the laugh. I really needed it!

Eley view book

written 1402 days ago
cherry

Well, you came up on my Fair Critter Review so now I have to delve deeper...

Very interesting story! In keeping with the flow of the rest of the story, I recommend you keep chapter 1 instead of chapter 2. Although the story flow is extremely important, so is a great opening. Perhaps more of what is going on in the president's head...

There are bits in here where I got bogged down by detail. Now I like detail, but I also like it to stay with the POV the book is written from. What does the president see? Hear?

The history is good, but seems to come in in the middle of nowhere at times. Again, stick to the POV. What the president knows and when he knows it.

The story line is excellent! With a little polish, you could truly make it shine!

Still can't believe I stayed up all night reading this story!


GREAT!

Eley view book

written 1403 days ago
cherry

Love our characters! They seem to come to life right before your eyes. The dialogue is well written.

I'm backing! view book

written 1403 days ago
cherry

This was laugh out loud funny! I enjoyed every last chapter!

Funny that I choose to read this tonight as morning rolls around I go to therapy for the first time in 20 yrs!

Loved the book! Very well written, story within a story was great. I could picture the character sitting there talking up a storm to this poor counselor. Really drew me in!

Excellent!

Thank you,
Eley view book

written 1404 days ago
cherry

WOW! I don't know what to say...

The story is so great! Desperate. I didn't want to keep reading it, but felt compelled to do so anyway. I needed to know how it ended, what was to become of them.
I can feel the pain, sorrow, desperation in the characters. The horrors faced.
Thank you for writing it.

Eley view book

written 1405 days ago
cherry

Okay, so I was only going to read a chapter or two...I instead stayed til the end.
Thank you for these wonderful words put strung together to create the symphony.
I truly needed to read this and appreciate you writing it.
Thank you!

Eley view book

written 1406 days ago
cherry

Well, I must say, this is the first book that I have sat down and read chapter by chapter through to the end.
The story line is amazing! The characters are a work of art! Truly an excellent work of art.
Thank you for sharing this story.

Eley view book

written 1407 days ago
cherry

I was quite surprised by this one. I didn't think I would like it, but after reading the first chapter, I was pleasantly surprised.
Thanks for sharing it with me.
Eley view book

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